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The Legend of the 10 Elemental Masters
What begins as an investigation into the cause of a series of unusual and unexplained events turns into a battle to save the Earth from elemental destruction. A mysterious, powerful, and persistent evil force seeks the masters of the elements that control and balance each element from an Earth entirely of that element. Earth's only hope is a powerful, spell-casting alien who has the dream of making three ordinary humans become like him. What hideous act does the evil force have planned?Immerse yourself into a deep, twisting plot that feels like you're playing a role playing game instead of reading. The unique script-like format reads like a classic role playing game. The in-depth, extreme character statistics and numbers popping out of objects further immerse you into the play.
275 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 1, 2008
24 people are currently reading
397 people want to read
About the author
Nick Smith
17 books3 followersLibrarian Note: There is more than one author in the GoodReads database with this name. See this thread for more information.
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Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews
October 4, 2020
a strange and compelling little piece of outsider art that despite being almost completely unreadable manages to be fascinating. a lot of the appeal has to do with having previous knowledge of the author, ulillillia, a guy who makes tutorials on the proper method of degreasing pizzas, and how to cook hamburger helper without any meat (down to on-the-spot mental recalculations of the exact measurements). the way nick smith percieves the world is radically different from your average person, but unlike a lot of other famous atypical people on the internet, you can see theres a specific roundabout logic to all the things he does. he thinks old drinks are gross, so logically, he chugs every bottle he drinks in one long pull, etc. of course! i dont mean any of this as an insult, hes just different and seems like a very nice guy from all his postings.
the story itself is set in a world where damage numbers pop out of people when theyre hurt, and everything is described down to the most minute detail, hexadecimals so you can be absolutely sure what color someones hair is, the exact size and shape of a room along with its specific units of brightness, so on. details are so minutely described that it actually becomes distracting. obviously, this isnt a casual read, and learning exactly how someones bedroom looks can be as much of a slog as you can imagine.
ulillillia doesnt seem to use a single metaphor or poetic description in the entire thing, its rote and exact and to the point. he has a singular vision in mind for how events unfold, and you the reader get to experience about as close to the way the author invisioned it in his head as one can. the novel is formatted as a screenplay, after all, he had the movie in his mind and maybe thats the best way to convey what he saw.
the main character of this story is one "Knuckles", a deeply OP alien who decides for some reason to tow around/kidnap a small gaggle of youths on his predetermined adventure to stop a bad guy, amusingly named "Seth King" from his plan to summon the 10 Elemental Masters to do... something or the other. Knuckles is extremely overpowered from the first page to the last. he can easily defeat any opponent in battle, and he is always 2 steps ahead of the villains plans. this naturally creates zero (0) tension for the plot, and one of the most fascinating parts of this book is trying to figure out the intentions behind making our hero so strong that you never think even for a second that he will fail.
the authors atypical nature leads to many memorable moments among the humdrummery of chair colors, or bed patterns. the way the characters interact with one another feel alien, with my favorite scene being this weird little chapter where the gang orders pizza (with coupons!) and the way the conversation goes is profoundly weird. reading it, you get the sense ulillillia feels more comfortable describing the exact way a spell looks while being cast, down to the feet it shoots in any direction, than he is communicating on even a basic level with most other human beings.
with all the intensive mechanics and pages of appendixes in the back of the book, its clear the author has put a ton of thought into the way the world works. the systems all do make sense, as always, in their weird and roundabout little way. heres 3 pages describing what each stat on a character mean. the plot doesnt make a lick of sense, characters have no real motivations, and plot holes pop up all the time, but yknow what? thats not why he wrote this thing. he wrote it with the numbers and the mechanics in mind.
the man clearly enjoyed writing this, its exactly his thing, and i think this is a fully realized piece of art because it fulfilled exactly what it intended to do. youre really never going to see much like this, anywhere else, ever. a difficult read, but completely unique and well worth your time if youre interested in the complicated man who wrote this thing on a keyboard lined with dryer sheets.
the story itself is set in a world where damage numbers pop out of people when theyre hurt, and everything is described down to the most minute detail, hexadecimals so you can be absolutely sure what color someones hair is, the exact size and shape of a room along with its specific units of brightness, so on. details are so minutely described that it actually becomes distracting. obviously, this isnt a casual read, and learning exactly how someones bedroom looks can be as much of a slog as you can imagine.
ulillillia doesnt seem to use a single metaphor or poetic description in the entire thing, its rote and exact and to the point. he has a singular vision in mind for how events unfold, and you the reader get to experience about as close to the way the author invisioned it in his head as one can. the novel is formatted as a screenplay, after all, he had the movie in his mind and maybe thats the best way to convey what he saw.
the main character of this story is one "Knuckles", a deeply OP alien who decides for some reason to tow around/kidnap a small gaggle of youths on his predetermined adventure to stop a bad guy, amusingly named "Seth King" from his plan to summon the 10 Elemental Masters to do... something or the other. Knuckles is extremely overpowered from the first page to the last. he can easily defeat any opponent in battle, and he is always 2 steps ahead of the villains plans. this naturally creates zero (0) tension for the plot, and one of the most fascinating parts of this book is trying to figure out the intentions behind making our hero so strong that you never think even for a second that he will fail.
the authors atypical nature leads to many memorable moments among the humdrummery of chair colors, or bed patterns. the way the characters interact with one another feel alien, with my favorite scene being this weird little chapter where the gang orders pizza (with coupons!) and the way the conversation goes is profoundly weird. reading it, you get the sense ulillillia feels more comfortable describing the exact way a spell looks while being cast, down to the feet it shoots in any direction, than he is communicating on even a basic level with most other human beings.
with all the intensive mechanics and pages of appendixes in the back of the book, its clear the author has put a ton of thought into the way the world works. the systems all do make sense, as always, in their weird and roundabout little way. heres 3 pages describing what each stat on a character mean. the plot doesnt make a lick of sense, characters have no real motivations, and plot holes pop up all the time, but yknow what? thats not why he wrote this thing. he wrote it with the numbers and the mechanics in mind.
the man clearly enjoyed writing this, its exactly his thing, and i think this is a fully realized piece of art because it fulfilled exactly what it intended to do. youre really never going to see much like this, anywhere else, ever. a difficult read, but completely unique and well worth your time if youre interested in the complicated man who wrote this thing on a keyboard lined with dryer sheets.
July 25, 2018
For this review, I can't decide whether to coin the term "ulillilliastic" or "ulillilliastrophe". This book treads a fine line between the two. It's a screenplay, a novel, and a description of a movie all at once, taking place in an alternate multi-dimensional reality where life is a video game, strength and magic are described by incredibly complex statistical attributes and elemental affinities, and little hit point numbers pop of out people and objects when they are harmed.
I read this because I knew it would be awful, and it is. But I'm serious when I say it is also a profound, rare, and compelling distillation of the mind from which it came -- a mind that functions like none other, one that most of us are happy we don't have to live in, and sadly one of the type that we tend to be too focused on fixing to really learn anything from.
Aside from the endless barrage of needless detail regarding the colors of the different damage indicators (complete with hex codes), numerical tiers of magic and their spell effects, and exact calculations of running speed, position, and vocal pauses of every character, the thing that is legitimately fascinating to me is that the main character, Knuckles is a creature so strong that he has conquered death itself. Immune to all harm, he is also able to resurrect and cure anybody around him with a magic spell that takes milliseconds to cast.
For some inexplicable reason, Knuckles takes three regular high school kids along on a bizarre quest to save the world from a time travelling ultra-powerful human who is kidnapping elemental masters for... some purpose. It doesn't matter. Knuckles gets exactly what you would expect out of these kids: absolutely fucking nothing. They assist neither magically nor intellectually, with Knuckles able to overcome every obstacle with nearly no effort. The kids exist only to fall, flounder, and repeatedly die and require resurrection. Yet Knuckles counts them as friends anyway.
As far as I understand, Knuckles is ulillillia's real-life imaginary companion in his fantasy, video game world. Just sit with that for a minute and your psych thesis writes itself.
I don't know what else to say. This book is hilariously unreadable. It's childish, trite, and error-ridden, and it demonstrates the author's struggles with communication and interpersonal relationships. He poured out a serving of his inscrutable, obsessive brain, and published it unedited and unfiltered, resulting in what might just be an accidental post-modern masterpiece.
I read this because I knew it would be awful, and it is. But I'm serious when I say it is also a profound, rare, and compelling distillation of the mind from which it came -- a mind that functions like none other, one that most of us are happy we don't have to live in, and sadly one of the type that we tend to be too focused on fixing to really learn anything from.
Aside from the endless barrage of needless detail regarding the colors of the different damage indicators (complete with hex codes), numerical tiers of magic and their spell effects, and exact calculations of running speed, position, and vocal pauses of every character, the thing that is legitimately fascinating to me is that the main character, Knuckles is a creature so strong that he has conquered death itself. Immune to all harm, he is also able to resurrect and cure anybody around him with a magic spell that takes milliseconds to cast.
For some inexplicable reason, Knuckles takes three regular high school kids along on a bizarre quest to save the world from a time travelling ultra-powerful human who is kidnapping elemental masters for... some purpose. It doesn't matter. Knuckles gets exactly what you would expect out of these kids: absolutely fucking nothing. They assist neither magically nor intellectually, with Knuckles able to overcome every obstacle with nearly no effort. The kids exist only to fall, flounder, and repeatedly die and require resurrection. Yet Knuckles counts them as friends anyway.
As far as I understand, Knuckles is ulillillia's real-life imaginary companion in his fantasy, video game world. Just sit with that for a minute and your psych thesis writes itself.
I don't know what else to say. This book is hilariously unreadable. It's childish, trite, and error-ridden, and it demonstrates the author's struggles with communication and interpersonal relationships. He poured out a serving of his inscrutable, obsessive brain, and published it unedited and unfiltered, resulting in what might just be an accidental post-modern masterpiece.
March 27, 2014
Imagine if... raw computer programming data, a calculus textbook, RPG Maker, and a bad fanfiction all had a baby...
The result is this awful unreadable abomination of text where we get pounded with so many ridiculous descriptive detail that it makes even the most long-winded of authors's texts look sparse.
Visit the author's website and gaze into unfathomable insanity.... HERE
The result is this awful unreadable abomination of text where we get pounded with so many ridiculous descriptive detail that it makes even the most long-winded of authors's texts look sparse.
Visit the author's website and gaze into unfathomable insanity.... HERE
July 25, 2025
Bubsy the Cat and his consequences. Don't put fall damage in your 2D platformer.
September 15, 2018
This is a very unique text, and I'm not at all surprised that I had such a positive reaction to it.
At first blush, ulillillia imposes a daunting task upon his reader: to share his vision of the story with a degree of specificity that one could only hope a lawmaker might command when enacting legislation. But don't worry; there are six appendices comprising twenty sections into which one may sink one's teeth if one so chooses. The hexadecimal codes that ulillillia uses to describe color might alone deter all but the most passionate of readers (a valuable lesson, perhaps, to the many straight-to-Kindle writers seeking their famous J.K. Rowling lifestyle through networking on Goodreads), though, to be fair, ulillillia himself notes in the preamble to Appendix 5: What numerical colors mean that "you can simply ignore (skip over) these notes [(i.e., the explanation of what numerical colors mean)]," which begs the question: Why would ulillillia spend so much time and energy to provide such incredible detail within the story? Well, I'll tell you why. As with the miniature dissertation on gliding in Appendix 6 in which ulillillia explains that gliding at maximum speed occurs "at an angle near 6.827994177089°," the color detail serves to enhance the overall reading experience for those interested enough to care. I'm not going to tell you that you should care. The text itself should - as should any other story of great literary merit - compel its reader to care for it. And in this respect, ulillillia egregiously fails.
Or does he? In place of compelling characters, realistic conversation, any semblance of human drama, sound physics, and a plot ulillillia offers his readers such focused, mathematical description of speed, space, color, and physical description that we readers could reenact the story to the up quark if such a universe that could contain the events of the story were to exist. So, at least we know what he's talking about when he's talking about nothing.
Is it a fanfic? Why is Knuckles so ridiculously OP? We may never know the answers to these questions. But we do know that the story was typed on a keyboard covered by dryer sheets.
I, for one, really enjoyed it. This book is a wild ride across the street for those who are brave enough to strap on a helmet, safety goggles, elbow pads, knee pads, shin guards, some heavy gloves, and a plastic body bubble to venture forth in their INKAS Huron Armored Personnel Carrier (APC) (8484 x 2565 x 3099 (mm), wheelbase 5994 (mm), seats 16) with 284 liters of fuel capacity.
I have to say the pizza party in Scene 20 had to be my favorite part. And although I wouldn't harm a fly, if I were the one waiting on Tu at a restaurant, I would have beat her unmercifully. It's also an enlightening scene. Notice that
By the way, if you felt betrayed, as I initially did, that Knuckles gives a full summary of the entire book on page 252, just think of it as ulillillia's benevolence. He provided you a convenient way to relive the story without any of the unique detail that makes this book really one of a kind.
I'm excited to read The Secret in the Basement next. So maybe this book is one of two of their own kind. We shall see. In amazing detail, I hope.
At first blush, ulillillia imposes a daunting task upon his reader: to share his vision of the story with a degree of specificity that one could only hope a lawmaker might command when enacting legislation. But don't worry; there are six appendices comprising twenty sections into which one may sink one's teeth if one so chooses. The hexadecimal codes that ulillillia uses to describe color might alone deter all but the most passionate of readers (a valuable lesson, perhaps, to the many straight-to-Kindle writers seeking their famous J.K. Rowling lifestyle through networking on Goodreads), though, to be fair, ulillillia himself notes in the preamble to Appendix 5: What numerical colors mean that "you can simply ignore (skip over) these notes [(i.e., the explanation of what numerical colors mean)]," which begs the question: Why would ulillillia spend so much time and energy to provide such incredible detail within the story? Well, I'll tell you why. As with the miniature dissertation on gliding in Appendix 6 in which ulillillia explains that gliding at maximum speed occurs "at an angle near 6.827994177089°," the color detail serves to enhance the overall reading experience for those interested enough to care. I'm not going to tell you that you should care. The text itself should - as should any other story of great literary merit - compel its reader to care for it. And in this respect, ulillillia egregiously fails.
Or does he? In place of compelling characters, realistic conversation, any semblance of human drama, sound physics, and a plot ulillillia offers his readers such focused, mathematical description of speed, space, color, and physical description that we readers could reenact the story to the up quark if such a universe that could contain the events of the story were to exist. So, at least we know what he's talking about when he's talking about nothing.
Is it a fanfic? Why is Knuckles so ridiculously OP? We may never know the answers to these questions. But we do know that the story was typed on a keyboard covered by dryer sheets.
I, for one, really enjoyed it. This book is a wild ride across the street for those who are brave enough to strap on a helmet, safety goggles, elbow pads, knee pads, shin guards, some heavy gloves, and a plastic body bubble to venture forth in their INKAS Huron Armored Personnel Carrier (APC) (8484 x 2565 x 3099 (mm), wheelbase 5994 (mm), seats 16) with 284 liters of fuel capacity.
I have to say the pizza party in Scene 20 had to be my favorite part. And although I wouldn't harm a fly, if I were the one waiting on Tu at a restaurant, I would have beat her unmercifully. It's also an enlightening scene. Notice that
By the way, if you felt betrayed, as I initially did, that Knuckles gives a full summary of the entire book on page 252, just think of it as ulillillia's benevolence. He provided you a convenient way to relive the story without any of the unique detail that makes this book really one of a kind.
I'm excited to read The Secret in the Basement next. So maybe this book is one of two of their own kind. We shall see. In amazing detail, I hope.
July 8, 2019
One of those books where the best reviews are the articles about it, I suspect. Anyone who hasn't read articles about this book should really do so.
I'm not going to rehash the premise (sonic? fanfic-esque neuro-atypical author fantasy proxy saves the world which runs in JRPG physics) or the method (the book transcends text to actually go into the physics and mechanisms of the world in the most literal of ways) more than I have to; while it's not a enjoyable book in a conventional fiction sense (which is the _point_, the fascinating with this book is that it's its outsider art by a non-writer in the traditional sense, a particular personality who has conveyed his values into a complete work with integrity to his vision and values. And I don't mean this as a dog-whistle for some kind of unsavoury content: this book is a perfectly viable young adult fantasy novel with good people winning over villains, albeit one written by someone who is a particular kind of neuro-atypical and optimized for that particular kind of neuro-atypical.
And in that sense, the book fulfills what it sets out to do. It's not one I can personally connect with, but if someone said they really connected with it on their mental wavelength, I'd believe them, and I'd be glad this book existed for them.
I'm not going to rehash the premise (sonic? fanfic-esque neuro-atypical author fantasy proxy saves the world which runs in JRPG physics) or the method (the book transcends text to actually go into the physics and mechanisms of the world in the most literal of ways) more than I have to; while it's not a enjoyable book in a conventional fiction sense (which is the _point_, the fascinating with this book is that it's its outsider art by a non-writer in the traditional sense, a particular personality who has conveyed his values into a complete work with integrity to his vision and values. And I don't mean this as a dog-whistle for some kind of unsavoury content: this book is a perfectly viable young adult fantasy novel with good people winning over villains, albeit one written by someone who is a particular kind of neuro-atypical and optimized for that particular kind of neuro-atypical.
And in that sense, the book fulfills what it sets out to do. It's not one I can personally connect with, but if someone said they really connected with it on their mental wavelength, I'd believe them, and I'd be glad this book existed for them.
May 20, 2013
Incredible book.
April 5, 2020
Not necessarily an amazing book, but a fascinating insight into one of the most unique minds on the internet. Some sort of cross between a novel, a screenplay, and a video game, this is a weird one worth checking out.
September 11, 2016
I can't believe I finished the entire thing.
February 12, 2021
Absurd Pantagruelian adventures and obsessive far-beyond-Robbe-Grilletian physical descriptions filtered through a Final Fantasy-themed lucid fever dream.
Completely sui generis.
Completely sui generis.
September 3, 2021
The more I read of the LitRPG genre, the more I really start to hate it. There's never a need to actually depict character hit points flashing 'on the screen' (i.e. page). God, it's just so cringy and unnecessary. Not to mention the restrictions its fans place on LitRPG authors. You seemingly have to adhere to a die hard, strict formula or they're off your hype train.
May 6, 2020
Look.
I appreciate outsider art, and this is as outside as you can get.
But having the protagonist of your story be an insanely overpowered entity, there is never any danger or suspense to the story. Setting aside the "unique" prose and questionable explanation of math, the story itself lacked any sort of hook or drama. The characters' speech patterns were odd. There were side-stories that didn't advance the plot or the characters. It was a slog to get through.
This was not a book I enjoyed. Your mileage may vary.
I appreciate outsider art, and this is as outside as you can get.
But having the protagonist of your story be an insanely overpowered entity, there is never any danger or suspense to the story. Setting aside the "unique" prose and questionable explanation of math, the story itself lacked any sort of hook or drama. The characters' speech patterns were odd. There were side-stories that didn't advance the plot or the characters. It was a slog to get through.
This was not a book I enjoyed. Your mileage may vary.
January 28, 2022
It’s not good, and I wouldn’t recommend it to most people. That said, it’s a fascinating look into the author’s mind. He understands storytelling in a broad strokes sort of way, but things like dramatic tension are cast aside in favor of making sure you know the exact (and I do mean exact) color and size of the room the characters are in. I don’t know much about the author’s history on the internet, if I did I might have “enjoyed” the book more.
July 19, 2025
This book was made in a lab not to appeal to me. I don't like RPGs, I hate numbers, I don't like reading scripts, there are too many characters who all sound the same... But man, if you factor in the metanarrative, this is pretty charming.
Which is at once praise and criticism. Nick Smith's "eclectic" writing hits you like a cinderblock to the skull and inundates you with numbers and formulae before you've wrapped your head around the fact that the main character is, essentially, a purple monkey who doesn't eat or sleep. It is not good. But in researching the author I've come to really appreciate Nick Smith as a person, which increased my tolerance beyond where it'd normally be. Is that fair? I don't know, but it kept me from giving it up.
This is the most outside outsider book we've had on the podcast since Empress Theresa. And having those books as a frame of reference somehow makes this one feel more hollow. There's so much math and stat sheets and NOTHING that I really don't know what Nick Smith was trying to SAY here. Not that he has to say something--he can be here to entertain, but if that were the case, then why isn't this fun?
Which is at once praise and criticism. Nick Smith's "eclectic" writing hits you like a cinderblock to the skull and inundates you with numbers and formulae before you've wrapped your head around the fact that the main character is, essentially, a purple monkey who doesn't eat or sleep. It is not good. But in researching the author I've come to really appreciate Nick Smith as a person, which increased my tolerance beyond where it'd normally be. Is that fair? I don't know, but it kept me from giving it up.
This is the most outside outsider book we've had on the podcast since Empress Theresa. And having those books as a frame of reference somehow makes this one feel more hollow. There's so much math and stat sheets and NOTHING that I really don't know what Nick Smith was trying to SAY here. Not that he has to say something--he can be here to entertain, but if that were the case, then why isn't this fun?
October 28, 2019
This was a truly unique and entertaining book from start to finish. There are some pacing issues, namely the scene where 6 of the elemental masters get captured when the first two had entire scenes dedicated to each. This made that point of the story feel a little bit rushed. I also had somewhat of an issue with the main character facing no issues that he couldn't solve effortlessly with spells. I was hoping at some point a road block of some sort would throw him for a loop and his spells wouldn't solve the problem, thus leaving it to the other characters to figure something out or him having to come up with a new strategy. The characters didn't have great characterization, but near the end that got a little bit better. Overall, I would say this was still a fun book to read and would recommend it. I look forward to reading the author's second book.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 10, 2021
Only book I can think of where the narrative is bound by an internal physics engine. I think readers can get a lot of inspiration out of it. Ulilillia is an incredible artist. It's fractal, which means themes and imagery repeat themselves throughout the book. It also means you don't really need to read past the first two chapters. It's not very good in terms of the story or writing but you don't really read it for that.
Read
May 6, 2025A star rating seems pointless for a work like this. Ulillillia is a unique individual, and unless you’re a fan of the man’s videos online, I can see how this work would be bewildering. I thoroughly enjoyed my time in his world, but this is very much “outsider art.”
With all that said, I’m looking forward to reading his other book.
With all that said, I’m looking forward to reading his other book.
February 19, 2021
Completely batshit, but in a good way?. An RPG played in the mind of an high-functioning autist written as a screenplay. Never ceased to surprise me, but not for everyone.
July 10, 2024
fantastic outsider fiction that demonstrates alot of how ulilili percieves the world.
Read
October 28, 2024remember to degrease your pizza.
August 21, 2025
autism simulator. must be extremely boring for people with no minds eye
Read
January 23, 2026mfw I'm a waitress working minimum wage in pizza hut and an evil force casts Cardiac Arrest 3 on me
January 28, 2026
Yes I actually read this and I have a physical copy. To do it, I had to force myself by making it the only book I brought with me on a four day river rafting trip. It's not a book you'd read for the normal reasons that people read books for. Frankly I don't really remember what happens. What it is is outsider art from someone who is clearly very concerned with having things be measured and defined by those measurements, and with having the interactions of the world governed by highly consistent RPG systems. All the characters are very down with this understanding of the world, so it's not really a story about a character navigating the world with this mindset. It's more like, this is how the author wishes reality worked, so in his fiction, all of the characters think like he does. Read around 2022.
August 22, 2021
I basically completely agree with the review written by username Jaymz
Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews