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Parched: A Memoir

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One woman’s journey to the bottom of the bottle—and back.
 
In this tragicomic memoir about alcoholism as spiritual thirst, Heather King—writer, lawyer, and National Public Radio commentator—describes her descent into the depths of addiction. Spanning a decades-long downward spiral, King’s harrowing story takes us from a small-town New England childhood to hitchhiking across the country to a cockroach-ridden “artist’s” loft in Boston. Waitressing at ever-shabbier restaurants, deriving what sustenance she could from books, she became a morning regular at a wet-brain-drunks’ bar—and that was after graduating from law school.
 
Saved by her family from the abyss, King finally realized that uniquely poetic, sensitive, and profound though she may have been, she was also a big-time mess. Casting her lot with the rest of humanity at last, she learned that suffering leads to redemption, that personal pain leads to compassion for others in pain, and, above all, that a sense of humor really, really helps.

276 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2005

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About the author

Heather King

13 books76 followers
Heather King is an essayist, memoirist, and blogger. Raised on the coast of New Hampshire, she struggled with alcoholism for many years, got sober in 1987, and converted to Catholicism in 1996.

She is the author of nine books of essay and memoir, and has recorded over 30 slice-of-life commentaries for National Public Radio's "All Things Considered."

She also speaks nationwide, writes a weekly arts and culture column for “Angelus,” the archdiocesan newspaper of LA, and a monthly column on unsung saints for “Magnificat” magazine.

Her work, which she roughly defines as "the tragicomedy of the cross," ranges in subject from addiction to vocational crises, conversion, food, money, cancer, unrequited love, prayer and healing from abortion.

She lives in Pasadena, CA. For more info and her blog, visit Heather King: Mystery, Smarts, Laughs.

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5 stars
290 (24%)
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396 (34%)
3 stars
336 (28%)
2 stars
120 (10%)
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21 (1%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 126 reviews
Profile Image for Tara.
185 reviews24 followers
October 31, 2012
Oddly for a Practical Theology book, the first adjective that comes to mind for this book is hilarious. Her sarcastic commentary on her own life made me laugh, even as I winced my way through her very, very drunk existence. It was also the first book in Practical Theology to make me cry...not because of her miserable life of abject squalor (scooping cockroaches out of your warm, flat beer first thing in the morning, anyone?), but because she finally finds grace and redemption at the end. She writes her memoir as a Christian--not explicitly, because excepting the Bible verses that begin each chapter, there is little discussion of God. Nevertheless, it was obvious that she was "new Heather" writing about "old Heather." In stark contrast, Fat Girl was "Bitter Judith Moore" writing about "Slowly becoming bitter Judith Moore." Heather King can look at her stupid, sinful behavior and honestly assess it. She makes no excuses, she takes responsibility for her actions, and she gives the glory to God. So refreshing after Fat Girl.

(And can I just say I am extremely amused by the fact that she went through law school COMPLETELY PLASTERED and graduated cum laude nevertheless.)

(Not saying that's acceptable.)

(But it's wicked funny.)

(Ok, mostly wicked.)

(...and funny.)

(I'm done.)
Profile Image for Michael.
20 reviews1 follower
August 29, 2009
This book brings to surface every alcoholics' fear: What if after becoming sober I become less interesting? King, despite her innate intellectual gifts, (of which I felt I was too often reminded) makes the fear valid. I feel that King had a riveting grasp and decent perspective on intoxication, but that did not extend into sobriety. According to this memoir King was subjected to an intervention (which ran exactly like they do on the show). After the intervention the writing lost any hint of irony, wit, and personality. Obviously this is not true of King as a person since she was able to inhabit her former intoxicated self with much success, but this brings to light the various ways in which authors try to deal with the rift between sobriety and addiction. King chose a classic narrative arc, although she does have the now familiar addiction prologue. This arc builds a foundation for many expectations and readers expect a before and after which lowers the jaw. The payoff of this book is that it simply exists. Does that make it meta or postmodern? Does an addiction memoir need an after or can it be implied? Imagine the show Intervention without the follow-up, imagine being stuck on the hook.
44 reviews
June 13, 2007
Parched
(Memoir of a recovering alcoholic)

When I’m reading a memoir, I want the author to grab hold of me and not let go. I want to find myself thinking about the book even when I’m not reading it. I want it to help me see something new or see something old in a new way. I want the writing to be stunningly brilliant and the story to be incredibly compelling. This? This was just alright.

On the one hand, hearing about someone’s life as a falling-down drunk (her words) was fascinating (and sad); but on the other hand, not as fascinating as you might expect. Like a lot of modern memoirs, I think this was probably cathartic for the author and enlightening for her friends and family (and other recovering—or not—alcoholics), but it left me wondering what, in particular, struck the publisher as particularly noteworthy about it. I’m sure there are a number of other memoirs in the same vein which say pretty much the same thing. Not a bad read, just not a very good one either.
Profile Image for Kate.
Author 7 books259 followers
July 30, 2015
(3 1/2 stars)

My favorite part of this book was the Q&A with the author at the end when she said this:

"I myself can never get enough of other people's personal essays and memoirs. I think we're all hungry for stories, hungry to make sense of the world, hungry to know we're not alone."

and this:

"Writing is an act of love. It has to spring from an essential stance of love toward this world that hurts us so much, and is at the same time shot through with splendor and glory."

Parched is very well written. For my taste, though, it was a bit over-done on the "downtrodden" part and under-done on the "what happens when she decides to face the music and change her life" part.

A few quotes I related to:

"It was no accident that the very first time I drank, and almost every time after, there were boys involved. For me, romance, fantasy, the pain of prospective heartache delivered the same kind of addictive rush..."

"The irony of instant gratification is that it leaves such lasting scars."

"Drinking was a fake way to feel better."

Profile Image for R.J. Will.
Author 5 books1 follower
April 30, 2015
This is an amazing book written by a woman of great courage. She gives us a beautifully-written story of her raging alcoholism, and there are no holds barred. For that very reason, the book in one sense was hard for me to read. Heather King takes the reader deep into the sad, sordid and scary world of alcohol addiction, and I wanted to scream at this highly intelligent woman and tell her to save herself before it was too late. Parched is one of the best memoirs I have read in years. It left me breathless.
Profile Image for Carolyn Stanley.
33 reviews
August 17, 2008
Originality in reviews would be great, but most reviews of this book were similar in a compassionate way....readers can't believe the authors poor, sad existence and how she made it through law school drunk. Many also said there was a "weird" Catholic conversion at the end. I didn't see it. I saw a woman who PREVIOUSLY had faith at one point in her young life and she regained it later on when she needed to most. I was expecting some strange occult happening w/ interventionists trying to sell her on the gift of God. Not so.......
Before I go any further, I should also say the book deserves at least another half star but I couldn't give one due to the fact goodreads.com doesn't let me or I'm to computer illiterate to figure it out.

Now, the beginning was a bit slow but the middle and end started to rev up. I loved Heather King's no nonsense style of writing. There were some parts that had me cracking up even though the events in the book itself were tragic. At one point in rehab, a counseler had pointed to a cliche clown painting and and said it reminded her of Heather "laughing on the outside and crying on the inside" to which the author wrote "A clown painting!? If that wasn't retarded, I didn't know what was."

The biggest question I have about this book is WHY? Why was her self esteem so low that she hated herself. She thought she deserved nothing? Her family, while poor....was really not that different from my family or many families back in that generation. (BTW-My mother was the same way w/ the windows in the Winter...ugh!) I didn't go out and drink at 13....I was waiting to read that something horrific happened to her in her youth but nothing.

While the author regularly mentions her parents are basically poor (a table of people share one piece of chicken or fish) the contradiction is in that they were always sending her one hundred dollars here and there, however that wouldn't completely support her. They also paid thousands for rehab. Now, throughout the book, she is getting fired and spending her money at the bar so who is supporting her? And I don't just mean rent/food/bills. I mean, when she just gets up and goes to Europe or goes to Puerto Rico and is always doing these extravagant things. (And yes, I realize she did get evicted from an apartment however there were many more apartments she lived in and had to pay for)

Another inconsistency that leaves me confused is that Terry is moving out to live w/ his rich boyfriend Steven. Steven leaves for the south and Terry invites her to stay w/ him. She arrives to what sounds like a crack house. An old dilapidated building with an entire floor of apartments sharing one extremely filthy, vile bathroom. The hallways are filled w/ odors and cat puke and the buildings residents are drunks and drug addicts. Did I miss something in the book?

The authors time in rehab was an eye opener for the author and the reader. Heather King conveyed her time there fantastically. I'm happy she has found some faith. Regardless of a persons religion (and this book isn't about religion-though it touches on having faith or reviving it) the book proves you need to have a little faith in something bigger than yourself or others to keep a person strong.

Though I had some discrepancies w/ the book at times, I applaud Heather King for getting through her tough dark times and for the story.
HOWEVER, a memoir worth reading (and one that REALLY GRABS YOU) is 'The Glass Castle' by Jeanette Walls. I've yet to read something nearly as good!
Profile Image for MaryAnn (EmilyD1037).
119 reviews2 followers
October 10, 2016
I really enjoyed this book, despite the swearing
and some of the grosser details of an abject
alcoholic life on the skids.

I don't usually read this type of book, as a child
forced to live in an alcoholic home, I don't like
to relive it. However, I read it because I wanted
the next two books to make sense.

I found the book when I was searching for books
by or about St. Therese of Lisieux. The 3rd book
in this "series" is about her life during a time she
(Heather) was reading/following? St. Therese's
spirituality. I hope the next two are as good or
better the first one.
Profile Image for Alloe.
15 reviews5 followers
September 20, 2012

Oh this book....I now know we are not all born with self esteem, and how sad it is that drugs and alcohol overcome ones potential. This booked dragged for me. On chapter 21 I had to call it quits. I may go back to it in between other books. It just didn't move me.
Profile Image for Emilia P.
1,726 reviews71 followers
September 24, 2015
Ughhhhh I loved this book. I've read a lot of Heather King before, pretty much all from the perspective of her recovering alcoholic, Catholic converted, wonderful, messy self, and so reading this book was really the missing puzzle piece to that stuff (um...maybe I need to go re-read those with this in mind?). Basically, I got where she was coming from in this book, which was terrifying, and speaks to both her strengths as a writer and my own experiences of self-doubt and self-loathing (hooray!)....for King, as a young person, alcohol served as a way to cover up/ignore all the things she was good at or cared about and absolved her from ever really trying or failing at anything, because it already confirmed for her, everyday, that she was a failure, that it was all that she was good for. At the same time, she saw the people and events around her with a keen eye (and they are fascinating in the retelling), loved a few but important people in her life very deeply, and hoped beyond hope in her gut that someone would save her from her increasingly messed-up self. It is heavy stuff, man. Spoiler alert: Family and uhhh probably God save her. And it was important for me to remember in my head the sober King, who is still a total sometimes nervous and sad and lonely weirdo but who is trying very hard and very nobly to be good and do good in the world (through her beautiful and challenging writing! hooray!) and how redemption and salvation and all of that beautiful, wonderful stuff is a lifelong, messy, and exhilarating process. Thank you so much for sharing that journey with us, H.K. You are singular. <3 <3 <3
Profile Image for Amanda.
69 reviews2 followers
August 17, 2009
Her clarity is a little implausible sometimes, which makes it hard to accept as pure truth, but what is pure truth anyway? I kind of feel like I'm living in squalor and actively letting everyone around me down just about now. That is how much it has gotten under my skin (possibly connected to the fact that I read it cover to cover in about 36 hours.

Seriously, though. I ran into Susan this morning, Susan who I'd flaked on yesterday morning, giving in instead to my theory of plausible dependability -- I asked to meet, she suggested Saturday at 9:30, I never actually said I'd be there. And so when the moment came I heard her unlocking the gate and I stayed put, reading a book about alcoholism. I feel a little like I stayed put, drinking heavily.

Point of annoyance: there's a lot of definitive recovery information ("I didn't know then that my body was hard wired to be addicted to alcohol.") that I don't necessarily buy. So if you think addiction is more complex you're likely to be hitting your head against a wall. I'm not an expert on addiction but I'm a big believer in spectrums of choice and predestination.
3 reviews
March 19, 2009
I have read many memoirs of various kinds, some very hard to read, about incest victims, drug addicts, and alcoholics. This one was different. The author mixes the raw daily life of a down and out alcoholic with humor in ways one would not imagine possible. But Ms. King has that kind of way with telling the truth. Hers is a tour de force life: Her childhood does not appear to be the cause of becoming an addict; indeed, I think rather it is her physical addiction at the tender age of 13--do not be put off by this--that establishes her immediate future as a heavy drinker of alcohol. Ms. King and her siblings share a penchant for irrelevancy and needling sarcasm that I think is interesting. She says she grew to believe that she was special, and it took her many years of a deteriorating lifestyle before she wakes up enough to recognize that her "specialness' has kept her from seeing clearly how much she is addicted. But it is in the telling that is so riveting and despite the subject matter, highly enjoyable. I salute her.
Profile Image for Laura.
32 reviews
January 23, 2009
I would give this 3 1/2 stars if half stars were allowed.

This is the second memoir of an alcoholic in Boston that I've read in a month. While reading Drinking: A Love Story - with all of Caroline Knapp's talk about the feel of wine bottle in your hand, the sounds of the cork releasing and the wine pouring in the glass, and the smoothness of the drink in your mouth - I constantly wanted to pour myself a glass. Heather King's experience is very different; her descriptions of drinking out of customer's cocktails as she waited tables or waking up to drink warm beer left in cups from the night before never made me thirsty.

There's not much of her recovery story here, just her life as a drunk until her family stages an intervention and she enters rehab. That was the one disappointment for me because I like reading about how people overcome their struggles. That will be her next book, I suppose.
Profile Image for Joanne McCoy.
94 reviews8 followers
March 2, 2013
Writing a recovery memoir is a lot like doing an impersonation of Millard Filmore. Who's to say how accurate it is? Therefore, it's my personal opinion that the lion's share of memoirs written by recovering people are either highly embellished or downright false. (James Frey's A Million Little Pieces is a prime example, and even Augusten Burroughs' much-beloved Dry has been called into question of late.) Not so with Heather King's Parched. There is real authenticity in this book about what it took for the author to finally figure out how to fill the hole in her soul with something non-toxic. In Heather King's own words: "Parched is a book about alcoholism as the human thirst for meaning gone awry. It is not a book about recovery; it is a book about resurrection. It is a memoir about a God so merciful that He welcomes all prodigal sons and daughters home. With jokes." Heather King's path may not be my path, or yours. But that's the point.
Profile Image for Heather Wildman.
Author 4 books4 followers
July 30, 2011
If this had been a work of fiction, I probably would have hated it. There was a lot of tell, but when it comes to actual memories of people, such as biographies, memoirs, and other such stories, I am a lot less picky about them. Books like these give an inside view to others who may have never experiences such things or who have lived with such experiences or others who go through them.

I've always loved learning about the inner workings of others, and while this isn't one of the most gripping and inspiring books of this kind that I've read, it did offer a lot of insight into the life of an addict. Putting oneself out there is hard enough. Admitting imperfections is a huge feat.

I give the readability of this book three stars, and the authors bravery in writing it four stars. Kudos, Heather, for putting yourself out there for others to get a glimpse of.
Profile Image for Badly Drawn Girl.
151 reviews28 followers
April 18, 2010

I have read so many memoirs that deal with addiction. At some point, most of them began to all run together. It's one long story told from a slightly different perspective. Heather King has done a difficult thing. She has taken a tired out theme and breathed new life into it. She presents one of the most shocking pictures of alcoholism I've ever seen in print and she does it by striking the perfect balance between humor and seriousness. This is a woman who literally wasted her talents and God given gifts for years. It's a life of quiet desperation that may have ended in death if it weren't for her family's intervention. I highly recommend this book to anyone interested in drinking/addiction and recovery.
Profile Image for Sally.
202 reviews4 followers
July 1, 2009
Well, since I live with men in recovery, I thought this would be interesting, and insightful. Oh, it was.

This is a very honest memoir about a young woman who becomes addicted at thirteen after her first drink. Heather manages college, law school and passing the bar, while being basically a real gutter low life drunk, living in squalor and working as a waitress in a trashy diner. It was shocking, really. There is a scene described when Heather leaves a recovery program that caused a momentary heave and sob on my part. While I cannot know those feelings she had personally, I certainly have seen some of it here at Isaiah House.
Profile Image for Ella.
65 reviews2 followers
October 26, 2010
I kept seeing this book on the shelf at the used book shop. I always passed it over because I don't drink and I had no interesting in reading some possible celebration of some girls drunken antics.

One day, I got over myself, and decided to read it. Something I won't regret.

Having a brother with drinking issues maybe I looked into this a bit differently but it really helped me obtain a completely non-straightedge jaded hardcore kid view point on how HE might feel about his lifestyle.

The book is funny.... well, because without humor a tragedy or something of the nature is just sad right?

If you are hungry for stories... check it out.
Profile Image for Julie.
130 reviews7 followers
July 30, 2008
I liked this book. Heather King describes her life as an alcoholic vividly and unflinchingly. No high functioning alcoholic here, she tells of how her life spun out of control until she had truly hit bottom. I liked her description of how it may not be life circumstances that predispose people to abuse alcohol, but the individual's reaction to those circumstances that creates the perfect storm for becoming an alcoholic. I found the book very moving. Anyone who is interested in how the mind of an alcoholic works will find much to think about in the this book.
Profile Image for Amy.
451 reviews44 followers
June 10, 2009
Palpable, Poignant, Humorous, Frightening & Sad. Like "A Million Little Pieces" this is a memoir about a person's descent into alcoholism. Unlike James Frey, Heather King is all too real in the telling of her experiences. Smart and talented, Heather was able to complete law school while in a drunken stupor. But, she continued to support her habit through waitressing jobs that she could get through half blitzed. This memoir follows her through her downward spiral, family intervention, stint in rehab and her new found appreciation for just being alive. Good read.
Profile Image for Betsy Dion.
270 reviews
February 25, 2012
This book is an interesting look into one woman's life as an alcoholic. Although she describes many awful things, she keeps her sense of humor and avoids self pity. There are so many terrible things from her childhood that she just takes in stride (the negative interaction patterns of her family, the lack of food and heat, etc). She seems like she is writing this book from a healthy place, and does not glamorize her former life (unlike some other addiction memoirs). I would have liked to see more of her life in recovery, but maybe that is another book...
Profile Image for Tiffany.
51 reviews18 followers
December 25, 2014
To read this account of a young woman recounting her addiction made every image of an alcoholic I had disappear. Bright, smart, creative, the only explanation for the compulsion to drink, she realizes, is spiritual and biological. She allowed me to reflect with her on why some people are addicts and some aren't, because our needs and feelings and experiences are commonplace but our compulsions are not. This is a brave retelling of every ugly, shameful, embarrassing part if her life as an alcoholic- a published moral inventory for the world to see.
Profile Image for Shaun.
161 reviews
January 12, 2009
This is such a great memoir. It starts off with Heather's current situation and backtracks from her childhood. It was heartwrenching at some parts and very real throughout. As I was reading, I was thinking about the folks that I see and can understand why they say, "man, you just don't know!" I really recommend this book, not because of the topic, but because of the great writing and the humor.
9 reviews1 follower
June 9, 2009
This is the memoir of an alcoholic written years after she'd been to rehab and not had a drink. It's hard to get through at times; as in the same old story day after day, but it's well written in that she doesn't make excuses or blame anyone. She simply talks about what her life was like as an alcoholic and why and how things changed for her after 20 years of self destruction. She also has a certain humor that I enjoy.
Profile Image for Elisa.
98 reviews1 follower
January 14, 2010
I finished this book only because it was a relatively easy read.
It was mostly about her dive into the depths of alcoholism and it just went on and on too long. I think she is blaming her upbringing but then at the end says how wonderful her family is!!? Whatever. She sounds liked she has pitied herself for 29 years. And it got a little old.
I'm glad I finished it and I'm glad she got sober.
I wanted to stop reading this book so many times!!
24 reviews1 follower
June 23, 2010
This was painful to read, just because Heather King was so self-destructive in her early life! But she has a refreshing point of view on all of her problems: she is quick to blame herself rather than her circumstances, and give glory to God rather than medicine. It's amazing, the grace that found her in the middle of her personal desert.
King has an appealing writing style, too. Her stories are full of distinct characters and clear-sighted introspection.
Profile Image for Mike.
110 reviews23 followers
May 2, 2011
We used this book as a text for our class in Practical Theology at NSA. The purpose was to use an autobiography to think about how we might bring the author to Christ were we to know her. How might you lead Heather to the Lord? How would you surprise Heather with the Gospel of Jesus? How would you enter her life in a way that will give you an audience with her that will allow you to talk about the things she has lived through?
Profile Image for Kirk Duckers.
21 reviews
June 19, 2011
What a story. This woman nearly died of alcoholism before she was 35 years old. Amazingly, during her worst times in her disease, she was able to graduate with a law degree, but nearly lost everything because she just couldn't quit drinking. Now over 20 years sober, Heather King has been a commentator for NPR's "All Things Considered," and has been published in a variety of magazines, journals, and compilations. She also has a few other books that follow this scary, but life-affirming memoir.
Profile Image for Emily.
Author 2 books82 followers
May 9, 2012
I thought there were well-written parts, but mostly I wanted to smack her! She drank and drank and threw away all her opportunities....and yet still managed to succeed in law school and pass the bar...but when she realized her problem, it made the rest of the pages worth it. King is brutally honest with herself and her reader, but I did spend a lot of time thinking, "What happened to her that led to this sort of life?"
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