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Did You Have the Life You Wanted?: A Novel
Did You Have the Life You Wanted? is a powerful work of women’s fiction about friendship, feminism, and the choices that shape a life.
In 1968, Anita Rappaport leaves her Brooklyn childhood behind and moves to Greenwich Village at the height of cultural and political upheaval. Against the backdrop of the Stonewall uprising, racially charged school strikes, Attica, and the emerging feminist movement, Anita navigates love, work, gender expectations, and the weight of family secrets. As she confronts violence, limited opportunities, and deeply ingrained stereotypes, Anita begins the lifelong work of defining herself on her own terms.
Spanning five decades—from the late 1960s through 2019—this multigenerational novel follows Anita and the women around her as they revisit a haunting question: Did you have the life you wanted? Their answers are revealing, heartbreaking, and unexpectedly hopeful.
A celebration of the 1970s and the women who lived through it, Did You Have the Life You Wanted? explores legacy, identity, and the enduring, life-affirming power of female friendship. Perfect for readers of literary fiction, feminist novels, and stories about women coming of age in times of social change.
In 1968, Anita Rappaport leaves her Brooklyn childhood behind and moves to Greenwich Village at the height of cultural and political upheaval. Against the backdrop of the Stonewall uprising, racially charged school strikes, Attica, and the emerging feminist movement, Anita navigates love, work, gender expectations, and the weight of family secrets. As she confronts violence, limited opportunities, and deeply ingrained stereotypes, Anita begins the lifelong work of defining herself on her own terms.
Spanning five decades—from the late 1960s through 2019—this multigenerational novel follows Anita and the women around her as they revisit a haunting question: Did you have the life you wanted? Their answers are revealing, heartbreaking, and unexpectedly hopeful.
A celebration of the 1970s and the women who lived through it, Did You Have the Life You Wanted? explores legacy, identity, and the enduring, life-affirming power of female friendship. Perfect for readers of literary fiction, feminist novels, and stories about women coming of age in times of social change.
426 pages
Published September 26, 2025
About the author
Andrea Simon
6 books68 followersAndrea Simon is a writer and photographer who lives in New York City. For the past several years, she has devoted her efforts to fiction and literary nonfiction, including her published memoir/history, Bashert: A Granddaughter’s Holocaust Quest, now in a paperback edition; her award-winning historical novel, Esfir Is Alive; her novel-in-stories, Floating in the Neversink; and her new novel, Did You Have the Life You Wanted? She is also the editor and a contributor to an anthology called Here's the Story ... Nine Women Write Their Lives. Andrea holds an MFA in Creative Writing from the City College of New York where she has taught writing.
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Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews
April 6, 2026
Anita, our main character poses this concept throughout the book:
Did you have the life you wanted?
This is not a fluff question requiring nostalgia and reflection, this book takes a good gander at how we are responsible for the life we live, and the choices we make.
I enjoyed this one, especially the time frame in life it covered. The 60s and 70s are decades full of history and passionate changes, and I enjoyed Anita's view on times, the obstacles and her associates/friends way of navigating them.
A big thank you to GetRed PR for a copy, this is one I am excited to discuss in a book club someday, it's the perfect type of discussion book.
Did you have the life you wanted?
This is not a fluff question requiring nostalgia and reflection, this book takes a good gander at how we are responsible for the life we live, and the choices we make.
I enjoyed this one, especially the time frame in life it covered. The 60s and 70s are decades full of history and passionate changes, and I enjoyed Anita's view on times, the obstacles and her associates/friends way of navigating them.
A big thank you to GetRed PR for a copy, this is one I am excited to discuss in a book club someday, it's the perfect type of discussion book.
April 16, 2026
Did You Have the Life You Wanted?
This is a question I feel like so many of us go through our life wondering, and trying to fulfill. Is it ever something we ever reach?
This story allows us to explore that while following Anita's life story. She has some friends that we see her stay close with, and I enjoyed this aspect. The support, and love they share for one another, along with the reminiscing really had me appreciating the friendships. We see all the hardships and where they prevail together, but also how life sometimes pulls them away from each other, but something always brings them back together as well!
I sit with this one not feeling fully satiated with not knowing how everything turned out, but also it makes sense to leave certain things unanswered because that's how life works.
Overall, this one had some really great moments, and takeaways that it's hard not to find something that you have experienced yourself in this book. Thank you GetRedPR for my gifted copy in return for my honest review!
This is a question I feel like so many of us go through our life wondering, and trying to fulfill. Is it ever something we ever reach?
This story allows us to explore that while following Anita's life story. She has some friends that we see her stay close with, and I enjoyed this aspect. The support, and love they share for one another, along with the reminiscing really had me appreciating the friendships. We see all the hardships and where they prevail together, but also how life sometimes pulls them away from each other, but something always brings them back together as well!
I sit with this one not feeling fully satiated with not knowing how everything turned out, but also it makes sense to leave certain things unanswered because that's how life works.
Overall, this one had some really great moments, and takeaways that it's hard not to find something that you have experienced yourself in this book. Thank you GetRedPR for my gifted copy in return for my honest review!
July 24, 2025
The book is well written, with evocative but not overdone descriptions. We trace the different lines in Anita's (the main character) story - her growing interest in the Holocaust, her writing background, her social work background - which culminate in her writing a book about the Holocaust to great acclaim. Too much of the last third of the novel is focused on every detail of her writing, her getting published, her promoting the book - maybe drawn from the author's own experiences, but these are details that don't hold my interest nor further the action of the book.
She has a number of friends, each with their own problems, so that they are fleshed out but interchangeable in some sense. (I had trouble keeping in mind who was who.) Some things are not fully developed, like a very serious drug reaction that for some reason does not end with her being rushed to the ER, and to which she refers in the future, but we never learn whether there was an underlying cause. It seems that it would be foreshadowing of some future situation but does not go that way. The book is meant to be a slice of life in the 1960s and 1970s, and that's probably the reason for all that befalls Anita and her friends, but there are too many loose ends for me to feel like I'm following through with her life.
The central question of the novel, "Did you have the life you wanted?", is put by Anita to multiple people, and that is a strong one and elicits interesting responses. It would be a great one to raise at a book club meeting that was discussing this book.
On the whole, I wouldn't talk this book down to anybody, but I wouldn't be enthusiastically recommending it as a next read, either.
I received a free copy of this book and am voluntarily leaving a review.
She has a number of friends, each with their own problems, so that they are fleshed out but interchangeable in some sense. (I had trouble keeping in mind who was who.) Some things are not fully developed, like a very serious drug reaction that for some reason does not end with her being rushed to the ER, and to which she refers in the future, but we never learn whether there was an underlying cause. It seems that it would be foreshadowing of some future situation but does not go that way. The book is meant to be a slice of life in the 1960s and 1970s, and that's probably the reason for all that befalls Anita and her friends, but there are too many loose ends for me to feel like I'm following through with her life.
The central question of the novel, "Did you have the life you wanted?", is put by Anita to multiple people, and that is a strong one and elicits interesting responses. It would be a great one to raise at a book club meeting that was discussing this book.
On the whole, I wouldn't talk this book down to anybody, but I wouldn't be enthusiastically recommending it as a next read, either.
I received a free copy of this book and am voluntarily leaving a review.
May 6, 2026
Did you have the life you wanted follows Anita Rappaport, a young woman just beginning life after college. She has already lived through several traumatic events & is constantly grappling with life & whether or not she is living to her fullest. This book has a great cast of female characters. I really enjoyed following their friendships through the years, and it was interesting to see how they changed as they aged. But, I really struggled to connect with any specific character. I appreciated that the author wasn’t afraid to handle heavy or taboo topics. I found the idea of a CR group very interesting!
The title itself is what initially drew me in, yet I don’t feel like it was ever truly answered. Each character really only gave an answer that felt surface level. I think maybe if I was older, I would have been able to connect with the characters a bit more.
Thank you Get Red PR for sending me a copy in exchange for an honest review!
The title itself is what initially drew me in, yet I don’t feel like it was ever truly answered. Each character really only gave an answer that felt surface level. I think maybe if I was older, I would have been able to connect with the characters a bit more.
Thank you Get Red PR for sending me a copy in exchange for an honest review!
April 6, 2026
The title drew me to this book. Initially, the title seems more of an accusation. However, as you read it becomes more of a contemplative question.
It’s starts with a young Anita in her 20’s working as a social worker. After a traumatic event she quits her job and takes on small temporary job that leads her a different direction in life.
The book focuses on female relationships and how life changes us over time, either taking us toward what we wanted or away from it. The CR group stands it to me the most. I wonder what it would be like to meet with a group of women on a regular basis and have a discussion on a random topic.
It’s starts with a young Anita in her 20’s working as a social worker. After a traumatic event she quits her job and takes on small temporary job that leads her a different direction in life.
The book focuses on female relationships and how life changes us over time, either taking us toward what we wanted or away from it. The CR group stands it to me the most. I wonder what it would be like to meet with a group of women on a regular basis and have a discussion on a random topic.
April 26, 2026
Did You Have the Life You Wanted? by Andrea Simon is one of those rare books that do so much more than simply tell a story. While I truly enjoyed getting to know Anita and following her journey, what struck me most wasn’t just her story, it was how deeply the book invites you to reflect on your own life.
Simon has a way of weaving introspection into every chapter, gently but powerfully encouraging readers to reconsider the choices they’ve made and the paths they’ve taken. It’s the kind of book that makes you pause, think, and even question things you may have long accepted without a second thought. That experience alone made this read feel incredibly meaningful.
At the same time, the portrayal of how women were treated across different time periods is both eye-opening and important. It adds depth and context to Anita’s story, highlighting the societal pressures and limitations she faced. But beyond the historical insight, it’s the emotional and philosophical impact that truly sets this book apart.
This isn’t just a story, it’s an experience. One that challenges you, moves you, and ultimately stays with you. A definite 5-star read.
Simon has a way of weaving introspection into every chapter, gently but powerfully encouraging readers to reconsider the choices they’ve made and the paths they’ve taken. It’s the kind of book that makes you pause, think, and even question things you may have long accepted without a second thought. That experience alone made this read feel incredibly meaningful.
At the same time, the portrayal of how women were treated across different time periods is both eye-opening and important. It adds depth and context to Anita’s story, highlighting the societal pressures and limitations she faced. But beyond the historical insight, it’s the emotional and philosophical impact that truly sets this book apart.
This isn’t just a story, it’s an experience. One that challenges you, moves you, and ultimately stays with you. A definite 5-star read.
October 2, 2025
When the title of a novel asks the question, Did You Have the Life You Wanted?, I’m guessing most readers of a certain age will be curious enough to pick up the book and see what the story is about, while at the same time attempt to answer the title’s question for themselves. At least this was my experience as I delved into this well-written fictional account of Anita Rappaport as she looks back on her younger days when she was a young social worker turned copywriter in New York City during the heydays of the late sixties and early seventies. An exciting time when danger lurked on city streets and sometimes on the subways.
In this rich and thought provoking story that explores friendship and the personal and professional lives of women, seasoned writer Andrea Simon, a lifelong New Yorker with numerous writing awards to her credit, takes the reader on an authentic and emotional journey where the past comes alive and depicts the joys and challenges, and sometimes sorrows, that come with lasting friendships and workplace and societal barriers.
I highly recommend it.
In this rich and thought provoking story that explores friendship and the personal and professional lives of women, seasoned writer Andrea Simon, a lifelong New Yorker with numerous writing awards to her credit, takes the reader on an authentic and emotional journey where the past comes alive and depicts the joys and challenges, and sometimes sorrows, that come with lasting friendships and workplace and societal barriers.
I highly recommend it.
October 4, 2025
Andrea Simon’s Did You Have the Life You Wanted opens with a title that is less a question and more an accusation, one that hovers over every page. It asks not only of the characters but of the reader: how do we measure a life, and who gets to decide if it was lived well? Simon, a memoirist and fiction writer, blends narrative modes here to produce a book that feels both intimate and universal, at once a personal excavation and a collective inquiry.
The book is structured around a central character—or perhaps, more accurately, a central consciousness—who reflects on relationships, ambitions, regrets, and the elusive balance between desire and duty. Simon resists linearity; instead, memory surfaces in fragments, anecdotes bleed into reflections, and the past is constantly renegotiated in the light of the present. This fragmented style mirrors the way people actually recall their lives—not as a neat chronology but as shards, flashes, overlapping voices.
What emerges is less the story of one life than a meditation on the very idea of fulfillment. The characters wrestle with parental expectations, with cultural scripts of success, with the tension between individual aspiration and collective responsibility. At times the prose has the gentle melancholy of Annie Ernaux, at others the raw candor of Elizabeth Strout. Simon is unafraid to linger on failure—not as spectacle, but as the quiet reality that most lives, when measured against idealized expectations, fall short.
Yet there is no cynicism here. Simon’s central triumph is her refusal to reduce her characters to symbols. They are messy, contradictory, and sometimes infuriatingly blind to their own complicity, but they are always alive. The question “Did you have the life you wanted?” becomes less about a binary yes/no and more about the recognition that lives are always partial, always compromised, always more complex than we can admit.
Placed within the broader canon of contemporary life-writing, the book stands out for its fluidity between memoir and fiction, its awareness that truth is not always factual but emotional. For readers weary of neat resolutions, Simon offers a more honest reckoning: life as process, as negotiation, as unfinished business. In an age obsessed with optimization and “living your best life,” this book is a necessary corrective, reminding us that most of us live the lives we can, not necessarily the ones we dream.
By the end, the reader is left not with answers but with a heightened sense of the questions themselves. And perhaps that is the point: to provoke reflection rather than deliver verdicts. In its quiet, meditative way, Did You Have the Life You Wanted insists that the measure of a life is not found in the grand gestures but in the fragile, imperfect human connections we make along the way.
The book is structured around a central character—or perhaps, more accurately, a central consciousness—who reflects on relationships, ambitions, regrets, and the elusive balance between desire and duty. Simon resists linearity; instead, memory surfaces in fragments, anecdotes bleed into reflections, and the past is constantly renegotiated in the light of the present. This fragmented style mirrors the way people actually recall their lives—not as a neat chronology but as shards, flashes, overlapping voices.
What emerges is less the story of one life than a meditation on the very idea of fulfillment. The characters wrestle with parental expectations, with cultural scripts of success, with the tension between individual aspiration and collective responsibility. At times the prose has the gentle melancholy of Annie Ernaux, at others the raw candor of Elizabeth Strout. Simon is unafraid to linger on failure—not as spectacle, but as the quiet reality that most lives, when measured against idealized expectations, fall short.
Yet there is no cynicism here. Simon’s central triumph is her refusal to reduce her characters to symbols. They are messy, contradictory, and sometimes infuriatingly blind to their own complicity, but they are always alive. The question “Did you have the life you wanted?” becomes less about a binary yes/no and more about the recognition that lives are always partial, always compromised, always more complex than we can admit.
Placed within the broader canon of contemporary life-writing, the book stands out for its fluidity between memoir and fiction, its awareness that truth is not always factual but emotional. For readers weary of neat resolutions, Simon offers a more honest reckoning: life as process, as negotiation, as unfinished business. In an age obsessed with optimization and “living your best life,” this book is a necessary corrective, reminding us that most of us live the lives we can, not necessarily the ones we dream.
By the end, the reader is left not with answers but with a heightened sense of the questions themselves. And perhaps that is the point: to provoke reflection rather than deliver verdicts. In its quiet, meditative way, Did You Have the Life You Wanted insists that the measure of a life is not found in the grand gestures but in the fragile, imperfect human connections we make along the way.
April 20, 2026
📚Book Review 📚- Did You Have The Life You Wanted by Andrea Simon
This is a book that tells the life story of a woman, Anita, who is struggling for independence in the late 1960’s-1970’s in a male dominated professional world. The book starts off as Anita is a social worker in a rough area of NYC, which was one of the only suitable jobs she can find when she finished college.
She almost gets assaulted by some young males and this leads to her quitting this job and starting in a career as a copywriter. She is living with her best friend in a small apartment and the book follows them as they navigate professional and personal relationships. Anita has had a traumatic life, but hasn’t realized it until her friends point it out to her. She forms a group with her friends, Conscious Raising group, to discuss current topics, which feels like the first generation book club!
I enjoyed Anita’s evolution as a wife and mother as well as her relationships with her friends. The last part of the book posed the question of the title and then her friends and others answering the question posed on the cover. Very thought provoking!
Thank you to Get Red Pr, Sibylline Press, and Andrea Simon for a copy of this book to review.
April 8, 2026
📖 Book Review 📖 As a therapist, I used to ask my clients to close their eyes and imagine they had a magic wand they could wave it and then visualize what they would change in their lives. Everyone had an answer and not just because they were in therapy, life is one wild and unpredictable journey and not many of us are where we expected to be. But the right tools and visualization motivate us to make changes to propel us in our growth. Andrea Simon brings a remarkably heartfelt novel that journeys through time and explores that existential question we all face.
Did You Have the Life You Wanted? follows the story of Anita as she walks through her dreams, hopes, trials, and disillusionment over the span of five decades. I think that no matter what era resonates with you, or what walk of life you originated from, Simon’s flawlessly smooth writing and reflections will connect with your own journey. Did You Have the Life You Wanted? radiates a warmth and coziness in writing and character development while pushing comfort levels with the relatable and relevant topics that have you thinking about that magic wand.
Did You Have the Life You Wanted? follows the story of Anita as she walks through her dreams, hopes, trials, and disillusionment over the span of five decades. I think that no matter what era resonates with you, or what walk of life you originated from, Simon’s flawlessly smooth writing and reflections will connect with your own journey. Did You Have the Life You Wanted? radiates a warmth and coziness in writing and character development while pushing comfort levels with the relatable and relevant topics that have you thinking about that magic wand.
April 23, 2026
This book sets out to explore an expansive, decades-long journey against a rich historical backdrop, but it ultimately didn’t work for me. While Anita’s life intersects with major cultural moments, the storytelling often felt more like a summary of events than a deeply immersive experience. I struggled to fully connect with the characters, and some of the emotional arcs felt distant rather than impactful. The themes of regret, identity, and female friendship are meaningful, but they never quite came together in a way that felt satisfying. The novel poses an interesting central question, yet its answers felt somewhat surface-level. In the end, I admired the scope, but the execution left me wanting more.
A huge shout out to Get Red PR for sending me the physical copy in exchange for an honest review.
A huge shout out to Get Red PR for sending me the physical copy in exchange for an honest review.
April 1, 2026
Alright, let’s get into it because this book is basically your no-nonsense bestie who grabs you by the shoulders and says, “Stop playing small and fix your life.” And honestly? We needed that.
Have the Life You Wanted is equal parts motivation, strategy, and gentle (okay, sometimes not-so-gentle) reality check. It’s not just about dreaming big—it’s about actually doing the work to get there. No fluff, no “manifest it and it’ll magically appear” energy this is grounded, practical, and refreshingly real.
Andrea Simon keeps it direct and relatable. You’re not drowning in jargon or overly complicated frameworks. It feels like a conversation with someone who’s been there, done that, and now wants you to do better with actionable steps instead of vague inspiration.
Have the Life You Wanted is equal parts motivation, strategy, and gentle (okay, sometimes not-so-gentle) reality check. It’s not just about dreaming big—it’s about actually doing the work to get there. No fluff, no “manifest it and it’ll magically appear” energy this is grounded, practical, and refreshingly real.
Andrea Simon keeps it direct and relatable. You’re not drowning in jargon or overly complicated frameworks. It feels like a conversation with someone who’s been there, done that, and now wants you to do better with actionable steps instead of vague inspiration.
April 11, 2026
Did you Have the Life You Wanted tells the brave story of one woman just trying to get by in life. I for one found this story to be very uplifting because at some poibt in life we have all tried having to find balance in our work and relationships. So in a way other readers will most likely find this story to be very relatable. I for one am super thankful that I took the time to read this book because the story was incredible.
We are introduced to Anita whom after college starts working as a social worker. She lives in the active 60's where civil rights are going on and danger is around every corner. She is at a point in hernlife where she is not only trying to make it in her career but her personal relationships as well.
We are introduced to Anita whom after college starts working as a social worker. She lives in the active 60's where civil rights are going on and danger is around every corner. She is at a point in hernlife where she is not only trying to make it in her career but her personal relationships as well.
April 23, 2026
have so many thoughts and feelings about this book that I don't know where to start. This is one of those moments where I wished I belonged to a book club or a group of women to talk about this book with. Right from the start it felt very personal to me. I sensed that this might be partly a memoir. I could feel it. So many things resognated with me. It also brought up a lot of questions for myself. I had a lot of inner dialogue while reading. I loved this book from beginning to end. I am certain it will stay with me for a very long time. I feel so fortunate to have been given the opportunity to read this phenomenal book. I already have the author's other books on my wishlist. And now excuse me for I must nurse my book hangover.
P.S. Read this book! :)
P.S. Read this book! :)
May 10, 2026
This book surprised me in the best way. I honestly wasn’t sure if I was going to like, it because it is different from the books I normally read, but I ended up loving every minute of this one. This book felt like sitting down with a friend and having a conversation about life’s trials and tribulations. I absolutely loved Andrea’s writing and how the story flowed. I really loved how she highlighted what it was like to be a woman in the 70s and tied it in with the social climate at the time. Highly recommend this book. Thank you Get Red Pr for the copy of this book.
October 10, 2025
Contemplative and compelling, Simon’s novel covers fifty years of her protagonist Anita’s life, from her early twenties in the late 1960’s to her seventies in 2019. Emphasizing feminism, female friendships, and making peace with complicated family relationships, the reader goes on a journey with Anita, asking herself: Do you have the life you wanted and is it too late to pursue the life you should have had? I loved it.
May 6, 2026
Did You Have the Life You Wanted? by Andrea Simon is a beautifully written, emotional read that really makes you stop and think. The characters feel real and relatable, and the story explores identity, choices, and expectations in such a thoughtful way.
It’s more of a slow, reflective journey than a fast-paced plot—but that’s what makes it stick with you long after you finish.
If you love character-driven stories that make you feel something, this one is absolutely worth it.
It’s more of a slow, reflective journey than a fast-paced plot—but that’s what makes it stick with you long after you finish.
If you love character-driven stories that make you feel something, this one is absolutely worth it.
December 9, 2025
As a younger woman than the characters featured in Andrea Simon's wonderful new book, I was happy to learn about all the important events that they experienced and how their generation paved the way for women's rights. An important book. Highly recommended.
Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews