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Ticker: The Funniest Man Alive
Stan “The Funniest Man Alive” Merlino is a show business icon. An Oscar, and multiple Emmy, Golden Globe, and Tony winner; he’s an “above the title” headliner on Broadway and TV, in motion pictures and standup comedy. Merlino’s name, quite simply, means joyful laughter around the globe.
But now, all his success cannot buy Merlino a single extra sunrise. Advancing kidney cancer - discovered too late. Stan quickly recognizes that he must make good on the one unpaid debt that defined his life. He must find Ticker Turner.
Flash back to a Summer Saturday in 1991. “A Bourbon and Diet Coke past midnight.” Merlino is the master of ceremonies at the Marquee Club, an upscale strip joint in center city Philadelphia. A Three Stooges suit enters and asks for a chance to do standup. Stan turns him down, but then the guy throws five $100 bills on the bar and bets that the audience will love him.
Stan accepts the bet and winds up witnessing the most gifted comic he’s ever seen. As the little guy comes off stage, he asks Merlino how he did and Stan answers, “You were ticking like a Swiss watch.” In an instant, Stan gains a friend who will become a brother, and Bernie Turkowski becomes Ticker Turner, professional comedian.
Ticker is Merlino’s and Turner’s story. Punchlines, laughter, heartaches, and all.
But now, all his success cannot buy Merlino a single extra sunrise. Advancing kidney cancer - discovered too late. Stan quickly recognizes that he must make good on the one unpaid debt that defined his life. He must find Ticker Turner.
Flash back to a Summer Saturday in 1991. “A Bourbon and Diet Coke past midnight.” Merlino is the master of ceremonies at the Marquee Club, an upscale strip joint in center city Philadelphia. A Three Stooges suit enters and asks for a chance to do standup. Stan turns him down, but then the guy throws five $100 bills on the bar and bets that the audience will love him.
Stan accepts the bet and winds up witnessing the most gifted comic he’s ever seen. As the little guy comes off stage, he asks Merlino how he did and Stan answers, “You were ticking like a Swiss watch.” In an instant, Stan gains a friend who will become a brother, and Bernie Turkowski becomes Ticker Turner, professional comedian.
Ticker is Merlino’s and Turner’s story. Punchlines, laughter, heartaches, and all.
400 pages, Kindle Edition
Published June 26, 2025
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