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I Just Wanted Love: Recovery of a Codependent, Sex and Love Addict
D.J. Burr is a man on a mission; successful business owner, highly respected psychotherapist and survivor of a dysfunctional life. At a young age, all he wanted was to be loved, but instead found himself targeted by a sexual predator. D.J. slipped into a life of addiction and clawed his way through broken relationships and seedy sex clubs--looking for love in all the wrong places. D.J. will take readers on a roller coaster of emotions as he details his search for grace and love
232 pages, Paperback
First published December 31, 2014
2 people are currently reading
146 people want to read
About the author
D.J. Burr
7 books8 followersD.J. Burr, LMHC, LPC is a licensed mental health counselor, private practice consultant, and author specializing in addiction recovery and trauma therapy. Born and raised in Marietta, GA, D.J. now operates ABLE Life Recovery, a virtual practice serving clients across multiple states.
Personal Journey: D.J.’s path to becoming a therapist was forged through his own recovery journey. After experiencing childhood trauma and sexual abuse, he struggled with addiction for years before finding healing through 12-step recovery and rigorous honesty. With 13 years in recovery, D.J. has transformed from surviving life to truly living it.
Professional Mission: D.J. specializes in sex addiction recovery, codependency, and trauma work, bringing both clinical expertise and lived experience to his practice. He is EMDR-trained and focuses on helping individuals move from addiction to thriving recovery.
Community Builder: Founder of the Private Pay Practitioners Facebook community (14,000+ members) and creator of resources that have helped hundreds of therapists build sustainable private pay practices.
Published Works: Author of “I Just Wanted Love: Recovery of a Codependent, Sex and Love Addict” and “The Private Pay Practitioners Playbook,” blending personal recovery insights with professional expertise.
Beyond Work: D.J. enjoys writing, horror movies, and has an admitted love for Nickelback and Destiny’s Child. He’s also a fan of classic 80s-90s cartoons like Transformers.
Personal Journey: D.J.’s path to becoming a therapist was forged through his own recovery journey. After experiencing childhood trauma and sexual abuse, he struggled with addiction for years before finding healing through 12-step recovery and rigorous honesty. With 13 years in recovery, D.J. has transformed from surviving life to truly living it.
Professional Mission: D.J. specializes in sex addiction recovery, codependency, and trauma work, bringing both clinical expertise and lived experience to his practice. He is EMDR-trained and focuses on helping individuals move from addiction to thriving recovery.
Community Builder: Founder of the Private Pay Practitioners Facebook community (14,000+ members) and creator of resources that have helped hundreds of therapists build sustainable private pay practices.
Published Works: Author of “I Just Wanted Love: Recovery of a Codependent, Sex and Love Addict” and “The Private Pay Practitioners Playbook,” blending personal recovery insights with professional expertise.
Beyond Work: D.J. enjoys writing, horror movies, and has an admitted love for Nickelback and Destiny’s Child. He’s also a fan of classic 80s-90s cartoons like Transformers.
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Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews
January 5, 2015
`Readers will be taken on a journey of self-discovery from the stages of my life to the inner workings of my recovery'
Darrett "D.J." Burr is a licensed mental health counselor in the Washington State; national certified counselor and a specialist in problematic sexual behavior. He has been in private practice in Seattle, WA for almost five years. D.J. is the co-founder, owner, and Executive Director of A.B.L.E. Counseling Services, LLC. D.J. is the creator of ABLE Affirmations, ABLE Life Recovery, and the ABLE Care Clinic. D.J. published Unfinished: A GLBT Domestic Violence Workbook while completing his Masters in Community Counseling at Argosy University-Atlanta in 2009. D.J. is set to release his memoir, I Just Wanted Love: Recovery of a Codependent, Sex and Love Addict, on December 31, 2014. Born in raised in Marietta, GA, D.J. has been known to many as a survivor. His childhood was less-than-nurturing. D.J. spent the majority of his early years tending to other's needs and wants; not knowing what his were. He kept fighting for more--more understanding of himself.
The power in DJ Burr's book begins with the quality of writing. He is fearless in his sharing his life, and the following opening pages makes that very clear. ``Someone actually said they were addicted to me, and that was the straw that broke the camel's back. I could no longer hold in all the pain and shame. I cried out in grief as I had this man inside pf me and said, `Take the condom off. I need you. I am addicted to you too.' Every ounce of who I was washed out of me as I climaxed multiple times with this man who was not wearing a condom. When it got right down to it, I just didn't believe I was worth anything. I wish I could say that I learned from my mistake that day, but I didn't. I took that risk again and again with him and others. At this point, I was utterly spent thinking about all the emotional baggage I had in my life. I just wanted to be wanted for me and who I was, but I didn't know how to get there. Somehow, I thought I would find the answers to my questions at the bathhouse. The bathhouse I frequented was a place where men could freely have sex out in the open or in private rooms. There was porn, a steam room, and showers. The facility even provided vending machines that were stocked with lubricant, condoms, and candy.'
Burr takes on a topic that is rarely written in self help books. Yes, it is a confessional, but that is how he makes his points so very pungent. The majority of the book is an instruction manual on how to deal with sex and love addiction, including therapy techniques and the 12 step program. Because of Burr's courage, we finally have a resource for those who are faced with this problem. It is a very fine addition to the literature.
Darrett "D.J." Burr is a licensed mental health counselor in the Washington State; national certified counselor and a specialist in problematic sexual behavior. He has been in private practice in Seattle, WA for almost five years. D.J. is the co-founder, owner, and Executive Director of A.B.L.E. Counseling Services, LLC. D.J. is the creator of ABLE Affirmations, ABLE Life Recovery, and the ABLE Care Clinic. D.J. published Unfinished: A GLBT Domestic Violence Workbook while completing his Masters in Community Counseling at Argosy University-Atlanta in 2009. D.J. is set to release his memoir, I Just Wanted Love: Recovery of a Codependent, Sex and Love Addict, on December 31, 2014. Born in raised in Marietta, GA, D.J. has been known to many as a survivor. His childhood was less-than-nurturing. D.J. spent the majority of his early years tending to other's needs and wants; not knowing what his were. He kept fighting for more--more understanding of himself.
The power in DJ Burr's book begins with the quality of writing. He is fearless in his sharing his life, and the following opening pages makes that very clear. ``Someone actually said they were addicted to me, and that was the straw that broke the camel's back. I could no longer hold in all the pain and shame. I cried out in grief as I had this man inside pf me and said, `Take the condom off. I need you. I am addicted to you too.' Every ounce of who I was washed out of me as I climaxed multiple times with this man who was not wearing a condom. When it got right down to it, I just didn't believe I was worth anything. I wish I could say that I learned from my mistake that day, but I didn't. I took that risk again and again with him and others. At this point, I was utterly spent thinking about all the emotional baggage I had in my life. I just wanted to be wanted for me and who I was, but I didn't know how to get there. Somehow, I thought I would find the answers to my questions at the bathhouse. The bathhouse I frequented was a place where men could freely have sex out in the open or in private rooms. There was porn, a steam room, and showers. The facility even provided vending machines that were stocked with lubricant, condoms, and candy.'
Burr takes on a topic that is rarely written in self help books. Yes, it is a confessional, but that is how he makes his points so very pungent. The majority of the book is an instruction manual on how to deal with sex and love addiction, including therapy techniques and the 12 step program. Because of Burr's courage, we finally have a resource for those who are faced with this problem. It is a very fine addition to the literature.
March 27, 2015
In I Just Wanted Love: Recovery of a Codependent, Sex and Love Addict, author Darrett "D.J." Burr's memoir takes the reader along for the ride on his emotional journey of recovery and renewal. This is a compelling and powerful memoir written in an inspirational style that bears the author's soul, and reveals the harrowing depths and direction that his addiction and dependency took him in before finding the courage and determination to seek recovery and a change in his lifestyle.
D.J.'s story is told in a very realistic, graphic, and straight forward style that will have the reader experiencing the full gamut of emotions. You can't help but feel empathy and compassion for him as his life has been anything but easy, yet you will also cheer him on as he healed during his recovery, and how it eventually led him towards a very admirable, fulfilling, and resourceful direction. I admire D.J.'s conviction, ethic, integrity, and determination to use his personal experience in his career as a licensed mental health counselor in order to help others who have also experienced traumatic lifestyles that comes with addiction and dependency. Along with his story, the author also provides the reader with informative and resourceful therapy techniques and information on the twelve step program.
I Just Wanted Love is an inspirational memoir that everyone can relate to and should read, it is a story that will stir your soul and resonate with you for a very long time.
Disclaimer: I received a copy of the book from the author in exchange for my honest review and participation in a virtual book tour event hosted by Pump Up Your Book.
http://jerseygirlbookreviews.blogspot...
D.J.'s story is told in a very realistic, graphic, and straight forward style that will have the reader experiencing the full gamut of emotions. You can't help but feel empathy and compassion for him as his life has been anything but easy, yet you will also cheer him on as he healed during his recovery, and how it eventually led him towards a very admirable, fulfilling, and resourceful direction. I admire D.J.'s conviction, ethic, integrity, and determination to use his personal experience in his career as a licensed mental health counselor in order to help others who have also experienced traumatic lifestyles that comes with addiction and dependency. Along with his story, the author also provides the reader with informative and resourceful therapy techniques and information on the twelve step program.
I Just Wanted Love is an inspirational memoir that everyone can relate to and should read, it is a story that will stir your soul and resonate with you for a very long time.
Disclaimer: I received a copy of the book from the author in exchange for my honest review and participation in a virtual book tour event hosted by Pump Up Your Book.
http://jerseygirlbookreviews.blogspot...
April 13, 2015
A Hearts Journey of Recovery, . . . What an excellent read. Being brave to share ones story in a way that those in recovery or not can understand, learn, and have compassion is exactly what this Author was able to accomplish with his book. Being in recovery over 8 1/2 years myself, I know the struggles we go through to recover. And also being a recovery writer and author myself, I know how difficult it is to write what many of us go through with any addiction, let alone a sex addiction and more. And a man sharing his story is not your usual find.
Reading D.J.'s story has touched me deeply. I to could relate to family and friends who turn away, and even though our addictions are different, I to spent years just looking to be loved unconditionally, and had many bad relationships, forced ones, ones with men who mistreated me, just because I wanted SOMEONE, ANYONE in my life. But then having that intense need for sex, and thinking it will fill those empty holes in our lives must have been hard to go through. Let alone the health risks as well.
Many 12 Step Recovery programs tell us we can recover without having to know the WHY'S of us turning to addiction in the first place. Well, this book proves that many of us do find the underlying issues, and past childhood trauma and being raised like I was in a dysfunctional life can effect many of us. Just an exceptional read! I'm patiently waiting for BOOK #2. . .
Reading D.J.'s story has touched me deeply. I to could relate to family and friends who turn away, and even though our addictions are different, I to spent years just looking to be loved unconditionally, and had many bad relationships, forced ones, ones with men who mistreated me, just because I wanted SOMEONE, ANYONE in my life. But then having that intense need for sex, and thinking it will fill those empty holes in our lives must have been hard to go through. Let alone the health risks as well.
Many 12 Step Recovery programs tell us we can recover without having to know the WHY'S of us turning to addiction in the first place. Well, this book proves that many of us do find the underlying issues, and past childhood trauma and being raised like I was in a dysfunctional life can effect many of us. Just an exceptional read! I'm patiently waiting for BOOK #2. . .
September 18, 2015
Intense, intriguing, and inspirational – this is how I would describe “I Just Wanted Love.” I really did not know what to expect when I started reading this book. This is not your typical self-help or 12-step book. What surprised me the most is how honest and raw it is – you witness the wounds and then watch the healing take place. The journey isn’t pretty either.
Even though this book it is a very easy read, I had to read and digest it in small doses. There’s a lot pack into 233 pages. D.J. goes below the surface and exposes the depth of his soul. All you want to do is reach out and hug him. By the end, you cannot do anything but admire his strength and courage. Besides his honesty, I like how D.J. offers healing and hope to his readers.
You do not have to be a love or sex addict to pick up this book. We all can empathize and sympathize with feelings of hopelessness, despair, and the will to survive. Everyone just wants to be loved. There is something for everyone in this book.
Even though this book it is a very easy read, I had to read and digest it in small doses. There’s a lot pack into 233 pages. D.J. goes below the surface and exposes the depth of his soul. All you want to do is reach out and hug him. By the end, you cannot do anything but admire his strength and courage. Besides his honesty, I like how D.J. offers healing and hope to his readers.
You do not have to be a love or sex addict to pick up this book. We all can empathize and sympathize with feelings of hopelessness, despair, and the will to survive. Everyone just wants to be loved. There is something for everyone in this book.
June 30, 2017
-Disclaimer: I won this book for free through goodreads giveaways in exchange for an honest review.-
I didn't want to do a review at all on this book because I disliked it so much. But I suppose I shall, keeping it short & not so sweet. Sometimes I wonder what goes on inside people's heads. Then I find a book like this & wish I hadn't of thought such a thought. To me it was too, too graphic (sexual) & not everything you think of needs to be written. Overall I didn't like one thing about the book. It was too sexual, disgusting, it was against everything I believe in, I didn't relate, & disliked the writing style.
I didn't want to do a review at all on this book because I disliked it so much. But I suppose I shall, keeping it short & not so sweet. Sometimes I wonder what goes on inside people's heads. Then I find a book like this & wish I hadn't of thought such a thought. To me it was too, too graphic (sexual) & not everything you think of needs to be written. Overall I didn't like one thing about the book. It was too sexual, disgusting, it was against everything I believe in, I didn't relate, & disliked the writing style.
March 16, 2015
Torn with emotions when reading this book and even after. DJ Burr is an inspiration! It's sad to know that this actually happens in so many lives. It was a hard read but yet even harder to put down! *WARNING* Emotional and touchy subject.
*Received for an honest review*
*Received for an honest review*
February 1, 2018
What a relatable book. Written well.
Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews