No Place Like Home, Thank God: A 22,000 Mile Bicycle Ride Around Europe

by Steven Primrose-Smith

Amazon UK Bestseller Number 1 in Cycling and Top 3 in Travel and in Sport"There are many books about cycle touring but few are as entertaining, informative and engaging as this one...The result is a funny and informative account of his travels to some of the Continent's well-known and more undiscovered corners. The writing is excellent..." - Julie Rand, CYCLE MagazineAfter a near fatal brain haemorrhage Steven Primrose-Smith decides that life is too short to hang around. Inspired, he jumps on his bicycle to travel a road that stretches 22,000 miles across the whole of Europe.During his ride through 53 countries, climbing the equivalent of 20 Everests, he dodges forest fires, packs of wild dogs and stray bulls, is twice mistaken for a tramp, meets a man in Bulgaria who lives under a table, discovers if ambassadors really do dish out pyramids of Ferrero Rocher at parties, transforms into a superhero after being savaged by radioactive mosquitoes near Chernobyl and comes close to death in France, Norway, Ukraine and Russia.Such a massive challenge requires calories and Steven gets his from the more unsavoury elements of European brains, testicles, lung and spleen stew, intestine sandwiches, sausages famous for smelling of poo, a handful of maggots and even a marmot. Nobody eats marmots.But the distance and his culinary adventures are only a part of the mission. His real objective is much more difficult. Will he be able to confirm something he has long suspected or will he, after all his searching, eventually find somewhere in Europe worse than his home town of Blackburn?Recent Amazon review “If you love travel, you will love this book! This is by far the best cycle-based travel book I have read...I could not put it down! It's very well-written, naturally funny without trying too hard and... about the places and people he discovers, not the bike itself...Inspirational and very funny.” “Highly entertaining – you'll laugh out loud. This is the funniest book I've read for a very long time. It's so much more than a story about a bike ride - it's a travelogue, a witty and astute observation about people and life, a candid description of many places you'd never even dream of visiting! Once you start to read it, I guarantee you WON'T put it down. I laughed out loud a dozen times before I'd even covered the first 3 chapters. Highly recommended.”“Very entertaining – never a dull page! What a Journey - once I started it I literally had to keep reading until the end! His descriptions of people and places along the way made me feel like I was right beside him on his epic journey and he kept me laughing all the way along! A definite must read...I can't wait for his next book!” “A travelogue with a difference! BIG laughs, pithy observations on life, the universe and everything else and simply great stories. A great read from start to finish.”“Thought-provoking and funny. This book made me laugh out loud as well as ponder the meaning of life; for anyone who has ever ridden a bike, done a bit of travelling or eaten food. Worth a read.”“A must read. I really enjoyed this book! The author has a witty vision of life and a special sense of humour. Loved it!”“Fab book with wonderful descriptions of his traveling experiences...make this well written book a joy to read and am happy to recommend it.” “Good fun and a great read. Laugh out loud funny...Looking forward to the sequel.”“Loved it from the first sentence!”“a great read witty funny”

Genres: Travel, Cycling, Nonfiction

353 pages, Kindle Edition

First published July 30, 2014

About the author

Steven Primrose-Smith has written sketches, songs, sitcoms and pantos for London-based NewsRevue, the world's longest-running live satirical comedy show, and The Sitcom Trials, as well as a series of comedy shows he produced in Spain. His writing has also appeared in The Independent, Cycle magazine and The National Student Magazine.

Steven's book "No Place Like Home, Thank God", about his near-death experience and the resulting 22,000-mile bicycle ride around Europe, is an Amazon International bestseller, reaching #1 in Cycling and #3 in both Sport and Travel. He has written four travel follow-ups: "Hungry for Miles" describes his 2015 attempt to cycle across Europe surviving on only £1 a day; "Route Britannia", another Amazon bestseller, explores in two parts his 2016 5,000-mile ride through every county in Britain; "Biking Broken Europe", yet another bestseller, follows his 6,000-mile journey through the more unstable bits of Europe, including the frozen and not-so-frozen conflicts of Transnistria, Abkhazia and Nagorno-Karabakh; and his latest book, "The Quest for the Holy Quail", tells of his 3,000-mile foodie adventure through the whole of Morocco as it closed down around him due to Covid-19.

As well as travel books, Steven writes humorous novels. His first, another Amazon UK bestseller (#1 in Satire), is "George Pearly is a Miserable Old Sod", a murder-mystery involving the most unpopular man on the Costa del Sol. He has recently released his third novel, "How Not to Be a Unicorn", in which a well-meaning New Age mum indulges her young son's wishes to be a unicorn and, while he sleeps, superglues a horn to his head.

Steven also manages EuropeByBicycle.com, a hub of information about cycling in Europe with country guides for over 50 destinations.

For the latest information about Steven and his latest releases and projects, please visit www.primrose-smith.com.

Reviews

[John · Rating 3 out of 5]

Can't quite bring myself to give this one four stars, so it's 3+ I guess.

Perfectly readable story, so I suppose my quibble is that it has the feel of being too ambitious in putting so much travel in one book. Towards the end, he seemed to be rushing through the trip to get it over with.

I'd read more of his work. For one thing, I liked his sense of humor (usually).

[Lynn H · Rating 2 out of 5]

A bit full of himself in the writing, with comments that he may have thought were funny but really made him look patronising. There was no sense of the accomplishment of the achievement. The information about the countries was very limited and didn’t give a feel of the major changes that the downfall of the USSR provoked in the countries and across the whole continent. The stereotyped generalisation that all of these Eastern European countries were willing partners in their post war fate was a tad patronising. The ride through Western Europe and Scandinavia gave not feeling for the diversity of these countries. I didn’t feel the challenge was a life changing experience as some travel books are. More a tick list of things to be got through.

[alec ramsey · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting but more importantly fun.

This book genuinely made me smile at times with Steven's quips and observations on life a c the different countries he is cycling through.

[Jessica Manning · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great Read!

A perfect mix of humor and adventure. I would recommend this to anyone who enjoys travelogues and is interested in Europe.

[Tom Bilcze · Rating 4 out of 5]

I found “No Place Like Home, Thank God: A 22,000 Mile Bicycle Ride Around Europe” by Steven Primrose-Smith an entertaining read. Many bicycle touring books are merely tour journals that rattle off the stats of their ride. Steven Primrose-Smith’s writing style is far from that. This book captured his trifecta tour of European capitals entertainingly. His matter-of-fact style of writing described his encounters and thoughts about the people, places, and roads he cycled quite vividly. I recommend this book if you are looking for a bicycle touring book that is not the same old formula but a book that makes you laugh while cycling with the author on this tour.

[Lonnie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Incredible odyssey & insights

Really observant and reflective of his experiences, Steven provides real insight into the different countries and cultures. At times absolutely hilarious, he provides an intelligent perspective of of his experiences. An extremely fun read of an obviously very interesting and intelligent individual.

[Ken Pemberton · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great holiday read

Humorous and not too descriptive. Gave an honest insight into long distance cycle touring which for those like me that think they would love to do it but never will did make for interesting reading. Unnecessary political slant but didn't detract too much.

[Gary Pettersson · Rating 3 out of 5]

Very entertaing

An entertaining and honest story about travelling through Europe. I really enjoyed it and even laughed out loud in places.

[Iin · Rating 5 out of 5]

Super read, great fun, interesting view on life and had a blast while cycling the world, brilliant book

[Chris Lee-Francis · Rating 2 out of 5]

The stories would make amazing pub conversation, but it didn't make a great book unfortunately.

[Ceri Jones · Rating 4 out of 5]

Quite funny in parts, a bit superficial in terms of the countries he visited, but not too surprising given how many he went to.

[Richard · Rating 3 out of 5]

A nicely written travel book of a pretty epic adventure around the whole of Europe. I read the printed version and would have liked some photos in the book, but other than that a really good read.

[Myra L Rice · Rating 3 out of 5]

Bicycle ride around Europe

Not well written account of riding around Europe on a bike. I know he didn't have a lot of time, but I would have liked to read more about each country not just the road conditions!

[David Sykes]

Well an interesting read, better than some plods around places, seemed rushed in the end. Will pick up other books of his one day.