Chosen Family

by Madeleine Gray

.
 
Books about friendship are not often described as love stories, but this is one.

Nell Argall and Eve Bowman are both brilliant, odd and friendless. Traumatised in their first year of high school, their lives are changed forever when they meet.
 
Set in Sydney over eighteen years, Chosen Family follows Nell and Eve as they grow into themselves, as they both love and destroy each other. From school, to university, to careers, to motherhood, Nell’s and Eve’s is a relationship that is a life-raft that is also a poison apple that is also a Medusan stare, frozen in time.

Together, Nell and Eve are a double helix. Love, guilt, shame, joy – these emotions twist and turn between them. Can the wounds of adolescent betrayal ever really heal? Can we ever really understand what is going on in someone else’s head? And what’s love got to do, got to do with it? 

'. ‘ 'Madeleine Gray writes so acutely about the mess of desire and the human condition.' Nigella Lawson

A sexy, romantic, queer, epic literary novel for all readers by the award-winning author of the internationally acclaimed bestseller Green Dot Clear your schedule for the all-consuming read.' Books+Publishing
 

‘I inhaled this book, holding my breath at passages that felt ripped straight from my high school diary in 2007.’ LUCINDA PRICE (@Froomes), author of All I Ever Wanted Was to Be Hot

‘Hilarious and devastating ... This book is everything to me.’ SIANG LU, Miles Franklin-winning author of Ghost Cities

 

Genres: Fiction, Queer, Contemporary, LGBT, Book Club, Audiobook, Literary Fiction

348 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 29, 2026

About the author

Madeleine Gray is a writer and critic from Sydney. Her first novel, Green Dot, was an international bestseller. Her second novel is Chosen Family. She has an MSt in English from the University of Oxford and a PhD in feminist literary theory from the University of Manchester.

Reviews

[Tom Murdoch · Rating 3 out of 5]

So, this book did irritate me.

However, I was irritated insofar as I was challenged to think beyond my own, perhaps rudimentary, queer experiences.

Gray is a fun writer and I always enjoy her prose (it can be a bit verbose at times). I don’t love the constant pop culture references, as I feel it takes you out of the moment, but that’s just me (I would also argue some of the language choices used in the 2008-2014 chapters were anachronistic and needed editing).

Ultimately the core characters are extremely frustrating and flawed, and I struggled to root for them making objectively manic decisions (and frankly they often acted out of indulgence, not queer altruism as they would purport).

Also, I hate hate HATE the trope of young, naive people having babies because “they know they’ll do it better”. So that bothered me, but also challenged me to listen and consider to their perspectives concerning family dynamics and queer love. Ultimately it’s a neat love letter to the queer community and for that I guess I enjoyed it.

[Holly Pedler · Rating 3 out of 5]

Wow this book is irritating! The main characters are incredibly unlikable, it’s full of unrealistic, cringy dialogue and the timeline jumping is annoying especially when we have to read about high school drama. The whole scenario of Eve and Nell having a baby together and platonically co-parenting while Nell is completely in love with Eve and never says anything just didn’t feel real at all. I would’ve given this two stars but added an extra one for the beautiful cover design.

[❋ Booked Out Today ❋ · Rating 5 out of 5]

Chosen Family by Madeleine Gray
★★★★★

Nell and Eve’s friendship is decades long and is full of love, heartbreak, and unspoken longing. Bound by loyalty and complicated affection, they navigate growing up, identity, and the blurred lines between friendship and family.

Let me check something! I’ve read 80 books already in 2025. THIS HAS BEEN MY FAVOURITE READ OF THE YEAR! I am so blown away by Madeleine’s craft in composing a heartfelt, funny and captivating story.

The book constantly pulled me back in every single time. It was like the little plot twists were perfectly placed in the story to keep it going. I lost a whole night of sleep because I just couldn’t put this down. So girl you owe me a full night rest tonight. But I’ll probably be up tonight thinking about the ending now!

This book was so relatable as a mother. I connected with so many ideas and themes in this book. I felt connected with Eve and only really understood Nell’s character in the final chapter.

I usually find books that switch timelines difficult to navigate. This was controlled perfectly. Switching back to time at the right moment, pulling everything together nicely.

I laughed so hard about Lake’s artwork. That scene is the funniest thing I’ve ever read. I’m not even joking. I have Green Dot sitting on my shelf and I can’t wait to devour that now.

I am swept away by how heartfelt and amazing this story was. I’ll be telling everyone I know to read this.

👶🏼🍷🎨📝

Thank you to @netgalley for a copy of this book.

💭 What’s your favourite read for 2025 so far?

Pour a hot drink, it’s book talk time.
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[suzannah ♡ · Rating 5 out of 5]

oh how STUNNING. although this has completely broken me. perhaps my favourite read of the year????

[Sheree | Keeping Up With The Penguins · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you’ve ever found yourself longing for a queer version of Normal People that’s set in Sydney and has a few more laughs, look no further: Chosen Family is exactly what you need, especially if you enjoyed Madeleine Gray’s previous novel Green Dot.

My full review of Chosen Family is up now on Keeping Up With The Penguins.

[Emily Michele Smith · Rating 3 out of 5]

Ahhhh. I didn’t really know what to expect with this one. Just blindly went in because I knew it would be good.
Madeline has done it again… Written a book with characters I thoroughly dislike, a story I find incredibly frustrating and for the most part far from enjoyable. But somehow I still really enjoyed the reading experience. It was an easy read and I feel like such an insane amount of content fit into such a normal sized book.
I don’t think Madeline sets out to write books with loveable characters… (going off her last book), but I do think she is a great storyteller. It was really refreshing to read something abit different.

Torn between 3-4 stars…
4 star reading experience of a 2-3 star story hahaha

[chloe · Rating 4 out of 5]

what an intense homoerotic friendship in adolescence will do to a dyke 😔 lowkey this is a lesbian horror novel!! enjoyed this quite a lot! i enjoyed the writing style and the alternating timelines between the chapters and the exploration of queer family dynamics and of course, what it means to have a chosen family. but at the root this was also genuinely quite horrific and distressing in relation to the dynamic between eve and nell. like lesbians can be scary as fuck!

[Ruth · Rating 2 out of 5]

I wanted to like and enjoy this but I was just left annoyed and a bit angry that I'd lost time reading to the end. Eve is one of the worst fictional characters I've encountered in a while - selfish, unaware and a coward, seemingly driven through adulthood by petty teenage girl revenge and confusion. Nell turns into a soggy doormat enthralled by the awful Eve. And Lake - no 5-7 year old child speaks like that and that should've been knocked out by early readings and edits. Lake and Bridget did the emotional hard work for Eve in driving Nell away because Eve is too selfish and cowardly. Chelsea was belittled as 'basic' but in the end, she's educated, rational, compassionate and functional - without that care, the too neatly tied up end isn't possible.
I wanted more but didn't get it from Chosen Family.

[Rose · Rating 2 out of 5]

This was my first DNF of the year. I really wanted to love this book. And while I certainly didn’t hate it, I found my feelings about it came in ebs and flows. I loved the relationship between the 2 main characters, Eve and Nell to begin with, and the hook question (“What did Eve do to make Nell leave?”) kept me turning the pages. However, I found the dialogue between the girls as teenagers/young adults to be too unrealistic. While hindsight makes us all insufferable in early adulthood (insert personal cringe here), I found their dialogue too Dawson’s Creek-esque mixed with Sally Rooney’s style. I wanted more clumsiness out of the characters in that age bracket and more relatability. Think more Hannah Horvath and her friends in Girls.

That being said, I would still recommend it to those who enjoy novels by Meg Mason and Sally Rooney. It wasn’t a hard pass but rather a “not for me”.

[Emily Conaghan 🐛 · Rating 5 out of 5]

It must be pretty exciting for Madeleine Gray to write two books and then for me, Emily, to rate them both five stars!

[Thomas · Rating 5 out of 5]

So beautifully crafted, Chosen Family is a love letter to the queer community and what it means to grow into one’s self. I devoured this novel, the characters and Normal People esque plot… everything about it. Giving this anything below 5 stars would be a disservice. Do not miss this one when it comes out!!

[Annie Martin · Rating 2 out of 5]

Feels a slightly unfair rating as I did enjoy the plot, but the feeling I left this book with was frustration - the dialogue was really lacking for me which took me out of the story, especially because of how reliant the book was on it. There were moments of great insight into the characters but broadly I felt like I didn’t really understand them. I did love the visceral setting in Sydney’s queer scene, especially being away from home, but not enough to redeem the book!

[Chiara Osborn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I learnt three things from reading this book:

Every all girl high school experience from 2008-2012 was the same, from trying to kiss your best friend to being worried about your pubes during a swimming carnival.

The best way to ask if someone is a lesbian is, “Are you licking the light fantastic?”

And if you love someone…probably just tell them for goodness sake.

[Meghan Grant · Rating 5 out of 5]

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Chosen Family by Madeline Gray is a tender, sharp, and deeply validating exploration of love, friendship, and the messy work of becoming yourself.

This novel captures something rarely articulated so honestly: the quiet, life-shaping power of chosen family. Gray writes with a clarity that feels both intimate and disarming, illuminating the ways friendships can sustain us, disappoint us, and ultimately shape who we are just as profoundly as romantic relationships ever could.

The characters feel achingly real—flawed, loving, selfish, generous, and painfully human. Their connections unfold in ways that mirror real life: through small moments, miscommunications, shared meals, emotional messes, and the slow realisation that love doesn’t always look the way we’re taught it should. Gray’s prose is understated but emotionally precise, trusting the reader to sit with discomfort, longing, and growth rather than tying everything up neatly.

What makes Chosen Family truly special is its emotional honesty. It doesn’t romanticise friendship or queerness; instead, it honours them in all their complexity. It’s a book about learning how to show up, how to let people change, and how to choose each other again and again—even when it’s hard.

This is a novel for anyone who has ever found home in people rather than places. Quietly powerful, beautifully observed, and deeply affirming, Chosen Family is a book that lingers long after the final page.

This novel broke me, put me back together and then broke me all over again. It’s definitely a ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ read for me 🫶🏼

[Emily · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an example of why you should give authors a second chance. When I read Green Dot, I hated the characters and the plot, but really enjoyed the writing. I did not think I would read another one of Gray’s books, but the lesbian plot line intrigued me and I am SO GLAD i picked this book up! It’s only January, but this is a strong contender for my favourite book of the year. In the first half, my heart broke for Eve, and in the second half my heart broke for Nell. Like literally heart broken for her. I would’ve loved a bit more of a resolved ending, but I am going to choose that they finally lived happily ever after. While I think Gray’s writing is so clever and witty, I also love that she can portray an emotion so vividly - some of my favourite examples are “Eve feels like if she’s grieving anything, it’s the mother she never had rather than the person who just died” and “It’s like a police officer coming to your front door and instead of telling you your child is dead they instead inform you that they’ve found a wallet full of wash and it’s yours.”

[Heather Fox · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not what I was expecting & I’m not quite sure what to make of it. Liked but didn’t love! Characters were tricky and unlikable, with lots left unresolved. I normally love a found family storyline but I did feel it got lost in this one

[EmG ReadsDaily · Rating 4 out of 5]

‘And why is it that the things we really mean are usually the hardest to put into words?’

[Sammi · Rating 4 out of 5]

lesbians that can’t communicate are my favourite kind of lesbians! loved this for its inwards look at queer family and queer spaces (and lovely to have them be in sydney). Gray is a great writer, and I liked this even more than Green Dot. Chosen Family is filled with great references, Newtown locations and relationship dynamics that felt very real even though I wanted to shake Eve and Nell by the shoulders.

[Alana Schutz · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5 smashed through this

[Siobhan · Rating 1 out of 5]

This was sooo corny man, an easy read and quick to get through but soooo full of cringe queer archetypes and unrealistic dialogue. Would avoid all characters here with a ten foot pole. The growth of the characters made no sense. No one goes from being a highly repressed high school lesbian to suddenly eating pussy like a mad man with the first girl you hook up with. This was like some whacko fantasy fanfic or something. Screamed at the line “she was wearing suk workwear. She was a lesbian”. Author never heard of show don’t tell

[Anneka Parker · Rating 2 out of 5]

Lost me at the neoliberal socks and didn’t get me back. Main characters were annoying and unlikeable and the writing style was just too Gen Z for me (sooo many pop culture references)

[Julia Cooper · Rating 3 out of 5]

I loved the writing but found the characters unlikeable and the ending felt rushed.

[Rebecca · Rating 2 out of 5]

Ok start, but the book quickly became predictable and frustrating. It tried too hard to be woke and current, with forced references that felt unauthentic. Eve became increasingly unlikeable and manipulative, the character dynamics felt uncomfortable, and the ending was unsatisfying. Overall, a disappointing read that didn’t live up to its potential.

[Hannah Wright · Rating 3 out of 5]

Maybe 3.5 stars

This was a real page turner, I absolutely flew through it and was dying to know what happened next. I do love a book about people behaving badly and this was that, the high school experiences felt extremely real and relatable. The thing I had an issue with was the language and subject matter the teenage versions of themselves were using in their dialogue but if I frame it to myself that Eve is an unreliable narrator and that’s just her retelling the events I can forgive it. Messy dynamics is what this book really nailed for me

[Julie Garner · Rating 5 out of 5]

Just finished this heartbreaking, beautiful, coming of age novel from Madeleine Gray and I found I am still wiping tears from my cheeks.
As with Green Dot, I love her quirky, modern day writing style which sometimes goes over the head of this just past 50 year old 🤣.
Be prepared to fall in love with her characters, seriously dislike her characters and ache for her characters. These people, if not already your people, will become your people.
Chosen Family is exactly as it sounds. It’s about finding yourself and surrounding yourself with people who know you and love you anyway. It is about building and growing your community through the laughs, loves and the hard times. It’s the nitty gritty of life with some extra thrown in.
Eve, Nell, Lake, Markus and Tae, we love you and welcome you to our world 💕

[Brittney · Rating 3 out of 5]

Tw: Gosford mention

2.5 ⭐️

[Nadia · Rating 4 out of 5]

MB Review:

It is what it says on the tin. Best friends Eve and Nell, rejecting normative parental ideals, coparent a child together, but Nell is no longer in the picture. From childhood they understood each other in that way that good friends do, seeing right through to you, but shame and outside influences create a friction that’ll follow them throughout their lives. This equally funny and heart-wrenching novel is about chosen families, how we hide ourselves from the ones we love, and how those who see us can create or destroy us. A perfect summer read for the self-proclaimed ‘Thought Daughter.’

[Sam · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read this in like 2 days (I am a slow reader lol, this is big for me). Madeline’s writing is so in the now, I feel like I can see the characters on the street.

The high school flashbacks have strong reminders of what being a bit of an awkward teen was like.

I like how I didn’t have to wait long from Green Dot to Chosen Family, selfishly I am curious for the next release!

[Lucy · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.25 stars.

I really enjoyed the queer dynamics in this! It is full of complex relationships and I found it very entertaining. It also moves through early teens to early thirties and the relationships formed and lost in that time. Some of the dialogue might have been a bit unrealistic but maybe that's just how people in the arts who smoke a lot of weed talk? Not sure, but this is the first book I've read featuring a young lesbian mum and that was great.

[Marni Rose · Rating 4 out of 5]

oh a gorgeous book. finished in bed with a coffee & a marmite cheese toastie which i am sure is exactly how gray would want it to be read. i loved her debut and was impressed by how different this felt, chosen family crafts a really expansive world and i was so invested in all of the characters. found the exploration of familial trauma & queer family dynamics to be incredibly compelling, reminded me a bit of detransition baby