The Courage to Be Disliked

by Ichiro Kishimi, Fumitake Koga

Genres: Audiobook

338 pages, Mass Market Paperback

Published August 19, 2025

About the author

Ichiro KISHIMI Philosopher, Adlerian psychologist and translator of English and German languages. Born in 1956.

M.A.in philosophy from Kyoto University. Director of the Japanese Society of Adlerian psychology. Former counselor at Maeda Clinic in Kyoto and has taught philosophy and ancient Greek at various institutions such as Kyoto University of Education and Nara Women's University.

He presently teaches educational psychology and clinical psychology at Meiji School of Oriental Medicine in Suita, Osaka. Kishimi now has his own private counseling office in Kameoka, Kyoto, and devotes his time to giving lectures on Adlerian Psychology and child education.

Reviews

[Nomin Otgonbayar · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is the book I read while ago when I was definitely facing issues of trying to fit in and trying to be liked by everyone. It was very interesting to read as a person who loves to read and write and enjoy reading. It was understandably the most, therefore, one of the books I would read again and recommend to people who struggle with fitting in society.

It digs deep into our reflections of trying to be someone else, but also, being who we truly are and people will accept us and judge us. It is harsh world to live in where we all judged by our races, appearances, cultures, and beliefs, or thoughts. However, we are able to live in the earnest of the now to accept, forgive, and embrace ourselves as individuals that at the end of the day, all those noises and judgments do not matter at all to be our true authentic self in our true colors. To keep living for our own lives.

I wouldn’t give this a book a 5 stars. It made me realize not try to fit into places where people don’t accept of who I am. I don’t have to be in that place anymore and just walk away. The people will come along the way. It is only to live in the now, the moment, the present. Enjoy your life while it lasts and who cares anyway? It is our own lives that we create for our own future and happiness. One of the best things to do is to stay out of social media platforms because you find yourself in better places, moods, and more relaxed, and more readings to do!

[Justmyfantasyworld · Rating 3 out of 5]

"A healthy feeling of inferiority is not something that comes from comparing oneself to others; it comes from one’s comparison with one’s ideal self." 🤔🧠

THE COURAGE TO BE DISLIKED by lchiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga, is an interesting take on life and philosophy. Some parts of it gave me new perspectives, others I could just not agree on.

The book is written in an interesting way since it reads as a dialogue between two people. The older person is explaining the philosophy to the younger person. In some ways this worked well, but it also confused me a bit at times.

✨️ 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 | ★★★ | 3.5/5

FIND ME HERE • @justmyfantasyworld

[Heather Snoop · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5- If you need a little inspirational life book, this is the way to go. The audio book was great, it just gave a really great perspective for life.

[Lastavitza · Rating 4 out of 5]

Some ideas presented in this book were quite hard for me to swallow and understand. I felt like I need to grow more to be able to see the viewpoints given by the main character - even if I didn’t agree with him.

I really like the idea of building horisontal relationships. As someone who grew up in a society that valued respect of the elderly even if they didn’t treat you the same, I am still trying to find a balance where my children will feel safe with me and respect me because they rely on me, not because they are afraid of punishment. The horizontal relationships idea really helps with finding that.

[Emily Bavaria · Rating 3 out of 5]

I cannot agree that trauma isn’t real. The fact that psychology has no real understanding of the function of the brain, it is a guess in the dark. Science is trying to understand where memory is in the brain. We often know a therapy or drug helps an individual but have no real understanding of how! However, I do believe that our interpersonal relationships should be horizontal. But think of all the generational healing that must occur. One can live in the here and now, live life as a journey even a journey full of joy and still have to accept the reality that some individuals are enemies that don’t deserve to be comrades.

[Sylvia McBride · Rating 3 out of 5]

I kept seeing this book featured on book lists that said it was life changing but honestly I am still unsure how I feel about it. Normally I can easily breeze through nonfiction but that was not the case this time. The book is a dialogue between a young man and philosopher which focuses on Adlerian psychology ideas. I actually found myself writing notes down to wrap my head around some of the concepts. I also found myself thinking about the theories in my free time, questioning if it all truly made sense.

[Mieke René · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was an Audible listen since I received 2 free months of Audible via an Amazon purchase, such great marketing. I prefer to read a book but this we an interesting, brand new topic of Adlering psychology study presented in a cool way that was more like being present with the actual dialogs of a philosopher and a student. I pulled what I wanted out of it and would like to learn more, just what the authors would want. It’s intentionally broken up to allow for natural stops to help absorb the information. Would recommend if you’re in the mood for learning different ways of thinking.

[joshua · Rating 5 out of 5]

Phenomenal book. 10/10, I will have to read a few more times both to fully absorb and to practice in daily life. Give it a go if you are feeling lost or stuck, recommend it immensely. I enjoy the way the content is represented as dialogue it makes it easier to understand and more exciting to read through even though this is not that sort of book. The lessons that can be learned from this book are life changing albeit difficult to implement if you have been living a certain way your entire life but i hope to implement slowly but surely.

[Carolyn Santa Maria · Rating 5 out of 5]

A little misleading with the title of the book, as that is a small segment of the overarching purpose of the book, which is to discuss the tenets of Adlerian psychology.

On that note, truly enjoyed the dialogue, found the tenets of Adlerian psychology fascinating, and many of them helpful, and will recommend to others.

[Kate Evans · Rating 4 out of 5]

“We are not living to satisfy others expectations. If you are not living life for yourself, who else is going to live it for you?”

[Jonathan Adams]

I was reminded of Plato's Republic and that's purposeful. I'm going to read this again.

[Araif Yusuff · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very light read, but the concepts were simple to understand. Found this to be a good read and appreciate the format in which the narrative was written. Kept me engaged.

[Haylee Zuchowski · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.75 ⭐️

[Heidi Aschenbrenner · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book really made me think. I found myself in reflection after each chapter. I liked the narrative manner the material was presented.

[brian · Rating 4 out of 5]

explained good concepts and principles but some were difficult to grasp or understand. may re-read in the future. good first philosophy book; loved the dialogue structure.

[claire · Rating 5 out of 5]

im not scared of the haterz anymore

[Megan · Rating 3 out of 5]

I find that this book may have been overhyped. There were some inspirational quotes and phrases I got out of it, but overall I kindof found it stuffy and bland