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Drunkard: A Hard-Drinking Life

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An extraordinarily honest memoir about the life of a functioning alcoholic and the realities of recovery from a veteran columnist for the Chicago Sun-Times

Neil Steinberg loves his wife. He loves his two young sons. He loves his job and his ramshackle old farmhouse in the suburbs. But he also loves to drink, a passion that rolls merrily along for twenty-five years until one terrible night when his two worlds collide and shatter.

Drunkard is the story of one man’s fall down the rabbit hole of alcoholism, and his slow crawl back out. Sentenced to an outpatient rehab program, Steinberg discovers that twenty-eight days of therapy cannot reverse the toll decades of vigorous drinking take on one’s soul. In clear, distinctive, honest, and funny prose, Steinberg comes to grips with his actions, rebuilds his marriage, and reclaims his life.

Unlike outlandish tales of addiction’s extremes, Steinberg’s story is a regular person’s account of the stark-yet-common realities of a problem faced by millions around the world. Drunkard is an important addition to the pantheon of critically acclaimed, bestselling memoirs such as The Tender Bar, Drinking: A Love Story, and Smashed.

288 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2008

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316 people want to read

About the author

Neil Steinberg

17 books27 followers
Neil Steinberg is a columnist for the Chicago Sun-Times, where he has been on staff since 1987.

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5 stars
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264 (39%)
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58 (8%)
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 106 reviews
Profile Image for Caroline.
881 reviews3 followers
March 15, 2009
Neil Steinberg is one of the few reasons why I still read the Sun Times. I remember reading about when he went to jail for smacking his wife and felt a drop in my stomach - like when you realize that the Santa at the mall is the same fat guy sucking on a smoke and retching in an alley way. It is a shock to put the two together. This book makes the divide even more. I wanted to like Neil Steinberg more after reading the book and I hoped that I could get more of the "real" him. Instead he came off as what I'm sure he wanted too - a privileged guy who drinks too much and doesn't really care. Maybe that is why I didn't care to much for him after the book - especially since I know he's been drinking again as he writes in his colmuns. I want their to be a reason for him to drink; a bad childhood, a tramautic experience in which he watched his best friend and dog drown, something that would make his drinking seem to be not his fault. But I guess that says alot about why addiction is so scary. It can be the nothings that get you rather than the somethings.
Profile Image for Lynn.
1,175 reviews
August 20, 2008
I have read quite a few drunkologues but none quite like this one. I can't exactly put my finger on the difference. Maybe it's because he not only pulls no punches but because he also makes no excuses, does no whining, and horrifies us as he entertains us. Maybe it's because he doesn't come from a bizarre, angst-ridden or addiction-wracked family like so many others who have told their stories. He had/has the kind of family and life many people only dream about - children, home, loving wife, supportive extended family, friends, great job - the whole package.

This is a clear, though not pretty picture, of how easily anyone could slide down the slippery slope of alcoholism if we are not paying attention - maybe even if we are. Steinberg shows us just how simple it is to do, how easy it is to rationalize and deny reality, and how very difficult it is to get past self-involvement and the siren call of the disease in order to find redemption. While I can't say I "enjoyed" this book, I will say it was a compulsive, educating read. The man can write.
Profile Image for Jennifer.
297 reviews
October 29, 2008
With a title "Drunkard: A Hard-Drinking Life", I expected an Augusten Burroughs style tale. I was sorely disappointed.

I got to page 173 before I was so infuriated with Neil's excuses, whining, ego and apparent lack of interest in recovery that I gave up. I didn't CARE if Neil drank again or recovered; if his marriage survived or failed; or if he was allowed to continue writing his newspaper column.

To add insult to injury, Neil's journey towards alcoholism is just plain BORING. There were no wild-drinking stories. Just a slow and steady decent into alcoholism by a boring, middle-aged suburbanite.

This book earns the dubious distinction of being the furthest I've gotten into a book before abandoning it.

If you're looking for an interesting memoir about addiction, I'd suggest sticking to "Dry" by Augusten Burroughs or "A Million Little Pieces" by James Frey.
Profile Image for Koren .
1,172 reviews40 followers
September 15, 2019
The author is a columnist for the Chicago Sun-Times so when, in an alcoholic rage, he hits his wife (something he never did sober), of course it is a big deal and makes the paper. He writes a book about his path to sobriety and all the pitfalls along the way. Few people succeed the first time and the author is no different. Drinking was a way of life for him and it was hard to quit when alcohol was all around and also being in the public eye. I was glad his wife stuck by him. This was a good look at what goes on inside the head of someone who is doing the best they can but, after all, is human.
7 reviews
December 14, 2016
I found this book extremely helpful to read as someone who has removed alcohol from my life for health and safety reasons but also as someone who still has a persistent desire to drink. Maybe you would never in a million years look at yourself and say, "I think I'm an alcoholic" but anyone who's ever wondered if they drink too much or may have had a few too many on a couple of occasions but has never wanted to consider that they have a problem, this book is a must read, if not as a cautionary tale of how it all catches up one way or another. Steinberg gives us some hearty wisdom along the way, though he fights the treatises of AA tooth and nail, not getting it until he gets it. This book is honest and straight-forward, with a narrator you sometimes despise but often find yourself nodding along with.

This book helped me on a personal level. I've spent the holidays badly wanting to drink even though I have been sober a year and in all honesty wish to continue being sober. I was standing in the kitchen listening to NPR when an interview with Neil and Sara Bader came on about Out of the Wreck I Rise. Neil made mention of his history with alcohol that he'd written about in this book. So I ordered this book, and I read it instead of drinking and it helped me remember the reasons why I can't drink. Like Neil, once I start I cannot stop. It's motivating to read the experience of someone who rejects most of what AA teaches but also can find the validity in the program, that even if we aren't hard drinkers getting shitfaced around the clock , even if we drank and still managed to keep our jobs, our families, and our lives on track, we still arrive at the conclusion that we are simply one of those people who cannot drink. I think more folks need to know that the line between social drinking and alcoholism is razor thin at best, and that this dependency is a sneaky beast and isn't always as obnoxious as an unintelligible drunk falling down in the street; rather it can invade our lives quickly and quietly and nest itself in our brains before we realize what's happening. I appreciate that this book exists and hope to find more like it.
Profile Image for Ocean.
Author 4 books52 followers
Read
November 12, 2020
i made it to page 61 of this book. i picked it up because i'm writing about the midwest and this guy lives in the chicago burbs. also he's an alcoholic and i'm an alcoholic so i thought reading his story would be helpful.
but, omg, this guy is UNBEARABLE. he is publicly humiliated after hitting his wife, an action for which he doesn't seem to apologize (but does ponder divorcing her over, even though it was entirely his fault) and the paper for which he works writes an article about it. he gets arrested by cops that APOLOGIZE to him and say that they love his chicago sun times column, and gets off incredibly easy and cannot stop being a dick. he goes to court-ordered rehab and literally writes, "how can i possibly be helped by someone whose office is smaller than my own?" then he complains that the intake worker didn't laugh at his joke about child sexual abuse!!!! you can't make this shit up.
he clearly thinks he's so much smarter than everyone else in rehab. i spent years working in a rehab, and these wealthy white guys who love telling staff they're doing everything wrong, despite the fact that said person's life is a complete and utter mess, are everyone's LEAST favorite client. i wish i could hug the people who had to put up with this asshole. i also heard, via these reviews, that he's drinking again and writing columns about it, probably lauding himself while putting his family through hell. seriously, fuck this guy.
Profile Image for Brandon.
184 reviews1 follower
February 16, 2020
I was not familiar with Steinberg as a columnist before I read this book, so everything about him (i.e. his writing career, his assault charge, his addiction) was totally new to me. I had randomly picked up this book at my library, and was intrigued by the memoir as I, just like many others, know someone that alcoholism has affected.

I was deeply invested as I worked my way through this book, my gut tightening when reading about when he hit his wife, or when he had a relapse after his first two months sober. I understand many did not care for the book due to the the unhappy subject matter and Steinberg being an unapologetic asshole the whole way through, but that's why I appreciated it. There was no happy ending. There was no definitive statement saying he would never drink again. The book left me feeling the way Neil seemed to: optimistic, yet exhausted at the seemingly endless amount of self-improvement ahead. I don't find myself feeling particularly bad for Steinberg, and I don't think that was his intention for the audience. I felt he just wanted to let the reader in on how a self-labeled "drunkard" experienced the world, regardless of how infuriating or illogical it may seem to those looking from the outside.

I took a lot from this book. It made me look inward at how my own vices sometimes overpower my ability to make the right decision. I also feel it may help me understand the mentality of those I love that experience addiction a little better. I don't think this book is for the faint of heart, but I do think the uncomfortableness it forces on the reader is meaningful, and fulfills Steinberg's goal in writing out his story.
Profile Image for Brian Kelly.
8 reviews2 followers
January 22, 2017
Most of the sober blogs and books I've discovered are written by women. Some are especially well-written like Drinking: A Love Story, but I wanted to hear that same level of introspection and depth from a man's perspective. This was harder to find than I expected. Then I came across Neil Steinberg's memoir.

Neil tells an especially tough story about his struggles with alcohol. It's not pretty. It's hard to know for certain how honest it is, but given the amount of negative actions and words that author shares about himself I trust this is about as honest as it gets.

If you have difficulty reading romantic recollections of a drinker's relationship with alcohol I would steer clear of this one. I find Neil's recollections helpful to understand what he was going through and just how deep he had gone.

I was especially impressed with how this memoir shows how gradually alcoholism goes from seldom celebration to "functional" drinking to problem drinking and physical addiction. It is so subtle. Neil's story is obviously just one man's perspective, but the detail with how he describes the evolution of the habit alone makes this worth a read.

I also found it helpful to read the perspective on AA from an agnostic/atheist (yes, he is somewhere in-between, or maybe that's me). He is both very critical and very supportive of the program. It's probably one of the most honest, thorough takes I've read about AA.

Prior to reading this book I was unfamiliar with the author and his Chicago Sun-Times column. I'm finding that I like personal memoirs written by professional writers (see: Brené Brown). If you like journalists and reading the news you might find this to be an especially good fit for a sobriety read.
Profile Image for Gregg.
507 reviews24 followers
May 30, 2021
Steinberg is someone I found when I stumbled across his blog this winter—he wrote a qualified defense of a local hack columnist that was one of the best pieces of writing about writing I’d seen on a blog in years—but it took a few months for me to look him up and discover his back story. This book is everything I loved about his blog and columns, and it’s thoroughly engrossing. Steinberg is honest about his struggles and relapses, and he gives the clearest window into AA that I suppose you can give without betraying anyone’s trust. He doesn’t just wield le mot juste ; I marvel also at his turn of phrase, seamless literary allusion and sense of humor. Good luck, Mr Steinberg.
Profile Image for TC.
101 reviews25 followers
February 10, 2013
Unlike probably most people who read this, I'm not familiar with Steinberg's column or his style. I came just to read a book about one person's struggle with addiction, and that's what this is: a story about a guy who has to face that his drinking went from something that was part of his life, to something he lived for. I feel it captured well what it must be like to wrestle with an addiction, particularly the constant rationalizing. For example, he doesn't want to let go because he paints beautiful, seductive pictures of wine tasting tours, sunsets on the beach, and jovial moments with literate co-workers at storied Chicago bars. Who would want to stop such sophisticated living?

But then, he relates the need to get a fix at 10:30 on a Saturday morning, and so grabs his son and deposits him at the local library as a pretext to buying some cheap vodka which he then consumes in the men's room--a lot of drinking goes on in bathrooms, in this story. Buying a cheap sweet liqueur on the sly and downing it in a disgusting porta-john while on a road-trip with the family doesn't have the same urbane ring as sipping a fifty-year port in a hotel lobby in Lisbon. No matter how much he might believe in the fantasy of the latter, his reality appears to be firmly of the former. I appreciate he was honest enough to share both.

Thanks to a court order, he reluctantly treats his addiction with the twelve steps, fighting each one (particularly surrendering to a higher power, good agnostic that he is). Yet it apparently provides enough of a structure and outlet that, despite his disdain, it helps him. He points out that until science properly understands the root of addiction and how to cure it, this and similar therapies are a bit like battling cancer by shouting at it. But for now, this is all we have.

Though the book ends on an uptempo beat--"one year clean and sober as of press time!"--it's clear there's nothing to celebrate here. He's an addict who can destroy his life with alcohol at any moment. I think he did a good job capturing the self-centerdness, the self-delusion, and the general selfishness of someone who is a functional addict, and the long hard slog they have if they choose to try to extract themselves from that self-focus, and instead focus on others. If you're an addict, maybe there's an inspirational story for you here. I am not one (and no, I'm not in denial), but if ever there was a reason to not become one, Steinberg's memoir provides plenty of misery showing why not.
Profile Image for Paige.
6 reviews
September 18, 2008
the reviews on the cover are correct... it's for anyone who's faced an uphill battle and won- or even lost.

one of the best quotes: "If your life is going to be wedded to a slur, it might as well be a colorful one." (re: use of the term 'drunkard')

The cover has lime green lettering with a large ice cube and it screamed "You need to read me!" from the shelf of a Barnes & Noble and I purchased it on a Friday night. I was done by 3:30pm on Saturday. It is not a thin book. It is the memoir of one man's struggle with alcoholism. But it is not just for alcoholics. It is a book for anyone facing an addiction, anyone trying to climb a mountain, anyone who is not perfect, and anyone who maybe thinks they in fact are perfect... and they've always wondered what the other side is like.
Drunkard is a tale, a chronology, a documentary. It is honest and it does not suppose to tell you there is hope for you... the only message is "This is my story" ... not to discount the actual many messages... but really, that's the bottom line.
It chronicles a craving. Always on your mind. Where is the next drink coming from? How good will it be? And eventually it doesn't matter to the point of desperation of drinking the cooking vanilla in the kitchen cupboard.
The catalyst to change for the Drunkard in the book was a night in jail. The law forced him into rehab. And so the journey begins...
It's an amazing read and I highly recommend it.
Profile Image for Mia.
63 reviews2 followers
January 26, 2009
"Frankly, I prefer 'drunkard.' 'Alcoholic' is so clinical. 'Drunkard' is redolent of tankards and alehouses and Falstaff in a wide leather belt. If your life is going to be wedded to a slur, it might as well be a colorful one." (pg. 166)

This book is smooth and easy (like a good scotch?). Steinberg really lets the reader into his head and is brutally honest. When he relapses after nearly a full month off the wagon, I felt like screaming "Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!! Don't go down in the basement!!!!!!" Despite this being the story of his struggle with alcohol addiction, I think many different kinds of addicts can relate (much of what he felt was the same way I felt when I quit smoking cigarettes after 25 years -- the drugs change the way the brain functions and thought processes become perverted). In spite of some of his asshole behavior, I sympathized with him and was rooting for him all the way -- and appreciated the fact that he never once made excuses for himself or his behavior. I have family members who were/are alcoholics and this book helped me understand them a bit better.
Profile Image for Pamela.
309 reviews4 followers
July 22, 2009
This is a narrative stroll through a year of Neil Steinberg's life, a Chicago Suntimes Columnist, self proclaimed Drunkard who describes his court proscribed rehab and multiple relapses. Never a fan of his column, I can honestly say I like him less after reading his biography. He comes accross as an arrogant soul who has zero reflection on how his destructive behavior injurs those around him. I understand that when in the depths of addiction, it is challenging to see beyond your own self, but.... It's as though he wants to romantically take on the role of hard drinking journalist and describe his follies into sobriety and relapses without ever confronting the pain that lies underneath. It's a quick read, but very little of substance of depth. I am glad that I didn't purchase this book but borrowed it from a friend. I'd hate to think that the pain he put his family and friends through would lead to income from book sales. I fear that his lack of judgement and fear of consequences will impair his driving or worse in the future. Glad to know that he takes the train home to the Northern Suburbs and that I won't see him on the expressway after a working lunch.
Profile Image for Terry Allen.
13 reviews
August 2, 2014
I like biographies, so this one interested me. It's not like anything I've read before. The lifestyle and draw of alcohol in this book were a little shocking. But more shocking to me was his inability to recognize the scope of his problem or understand the affect on his family, and fellow alcoholics while in forced therapy. I guess that was exactly the pint if the book. It's what alcoholism is. It's a loss if rationality. I'm glad he wrote it, I'm glad I read it, and I hope it finds the people who need to read it!
Profile Image for Matt.
23 reviews17 followers
November 16, 2020
Book 1 of my 50 books in 52 weeks.

Drunkard reads like Bukowski lite. Written by popular Chicago Sun Times author Neil Steinberg, this memoir chronicles his struggle with booze and details [not surprisingly:] his path to recovery.
Profile Image for Stephenie (Insta: reading_and_running_ ).
76 reviews1 follower
December 19, 2021
I don’t know why I listened to this whole book. The main character was the worst. This was pretty much a day to day account of the most unlikable man’s quest for his next drink. I couldn’t even root for him; I just wanted him to go away.
Profile Image for Emily Green.
594 reviews22 followers
November 21, 2018
Neil Steinberg’s recovery memoir “Drunkard” covers more drinking than it does recovery. By focusing on relapse, Steinberg shows the painful struggle to gain sobriety as well as the irrational pull of addiction. Typically rational people are made into fools by their addictions, as Steinberg demonstrates as he tries to avoid, critique, and dilute the program of Alcoholics Anonymous.

Steinberg is a happy journalist with an idyllic family living in a nice home. At least, that’s what Steinberg thinks, until he strikes his wife and goes to jail. From there, he enters outpatient rehab and attempts to rebuild his life, but finds that he is unable sustain sobriety. Even as his marriage and relationships with his children are jeopardized, he still finds himself slipping into drinking. Sometimes he plans his slips and sometimes he slips completely against his will.

Steinberg does not come across as a particularly sympathetic character. After smacking his wife, instead of remorse or concern for his wife, he considers getting a divorce so that he can drink in peace. During a group session he complains that his wife will not do what he asks her to do, including getting the laundry done when he asks. He also shows little concern for leaving his sons alone so that he can buy liquor.

While these behaviors are related to addiction, the selfishness seems to be beyond obsession and demonstrates a complete disregard for others, especially his wife.

Drunkard shows the obsession and bafflement of addiction. The narrative feels honest and straight forward. It is hard to stay with Steinberg without flinching, but that is part of the point, is it not? There is nothing glamorous about addiction.

I found this book as I was looking for Steinberg’s anthology Out of the Wreck I Rise, which I heard him discussing on one of my favorite podcasts, Poetry off the Shelf. In the interview, he said that he aims to change the perception of recovery to one of bravery. This is not the book that will change public opinion, since the reader does not get the view of Steinberg as particularly brave.
Profile Image for Zee.
370 reviews4 followers
September 17, 2022
Picked this book randomly from my college’s library. I was interested to learn more about the struggles of addiction. Not even halfway through the book I was just infuriated with Neil’s approach to the whole thing. He blamed his wife for his mishaps, he had an ego problem, and he lacked any interest in recovery. Mid-way through the book I stopped caring, I didn’t care if he drank again; if his marriage failed; or if he’s going to lose his job. Moreover, the writing style wasn’t up my alley, and I found the book to be boring. Wouldn’t recommend for peeps who want to see the difficult side of recovery and alcoholism.
Profile Image for Prudence.
308 reviews2 followers
November 17, 2025
Realistic, honest account of the day to day life of a journalist who is submerged in the jworld of hydraulic lunches, cocktails with clients, and alcohol fueled social events. On top of this he is sure that bottles of Jack Daniel's are stashed within easy reach. His careless disregard for his wife and barely tolerated frustration with his children is apparent. The banality of his life is intolerable without the comfort of spirits. Anyone familiar with alcoholism will recognize this unromanticized portrait of the daily struggle and repeated recoveries endured by the protagonist. Unreliable, yet human. Good insight into the brain of the addict.
269 reviews4 followers
April 20, 2018
I didn't really particularly enjoy Steinberg until after he sobered up, so I'd missed this book when it came out. But I'm enough of a fan now that when he mentioned this recently I tracked down a copy. It's absolutely excellent. It's not really more or less than it purports to be--one man's story of how alcohol was central to his life right up until it was about to cost him everything. He doesn't get sober in any dramatic way--he gets help, he relapses, he gets some more help, he screws up, and finally it holds--but the writing is so intimate that I found it hard to put it down.
Profile Image for Sharon.
356 reviews2 followers
May 19, 2023
I thought this was a well crafted book. Alcoholism is a very hard thing to beat. He fights the message that he can’t drink at all, terribly hard. Relapses, again and again. Has a tough time admitting that he needs help, that he needs to listen to others. He appears to be in love with himself as the hard drinking reporter, he craves that image. It makes him feel sophisticated and world wise.
All not true, but that’s what he tells himself. The amounts he drinks astonished me. Just the sheer quantity.
Profile Image for David L..
76 reviews
September 14, 2018
I wonder how hard it was for him to write this tell-all book about his alcohol addictions. He is, to this day, a Chicago Sun-Times columnist and I would guess that a form of therapy was writing this book, because writing is what he does. I can't imagine drinking like this or the pain and difficulties and emotional stress trying to quit.
Profile Image for Jen.
224 reviews
September 7, 2023
I found this book easy to read and engaging, despite finding the author/main character unlikeable. I can’t separate my enjoyment of this book from the personal experience of being the child of an addict, so I know my opinion is biased. The storytelling is balanced and pleasant even if the story itself is not.
Profile Image for Doug.
821 reviews
April 19, 2024
Well written (as expected) but there is a LOT of time spent reviewing the long, slow realization by the author that there is a problem. And even with realization, the inability to see how much of a problem. I suppose it's that "good grief - get a clue" sense that is wearing. One wonders how long we fail to see our own problems - and how patient people are, waiting for us to clue in!
Profile Image for Kathy Taggart.
60 reviews2 followers
June 3, 2025
One of my favorite writers gives an in depth account of his struggles with alcoholism and recovery. Real insight and humor. I need to listen to the audiobook to hear his original version unaffected by the publisher, who thought it was too funny. Warning - he’s noted that his book makes you want to drink. I can see it.
3 reviews
September 7, 2017
Powerful writing. Compelling, relevant subject matter.
Profile Image for Margaret R.
296 reviews2 followers
May 9, 2018
Excellent writing especially in the beginning. At the end became tedious.
Profile Image for Erik Steiner.
60 reviews13 followers
March 23, 2019
Great autobiographical account of top journalist's struggle with alcoholism.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 106 reviews

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