Stuck on Hard Mode: The ADHD, Autistic, and AuDHD Strategy Guide for Real Life

by Erin Phillips

Your energy levels are depleted; those laundry and washing up questlines are all flashing with red exclamation marks and nearly everything is on fire...but that's just an average day for many neurodivergent people, right?

Being autistic, ADHD or AuDHD can sometimes feel like you're stuck on hard mode with no option to toggle that difficulty setting. Fear not! The first ever neurodivergent-friendly strategy guide to everyday life is here to improve your gameplay in a world built for neurotypicals.

Hilarious, fun and packed full of gorgeous art and 'screenshots' from the ultimate game - real life - this strategy guide is your tool to surviving the missions and quests of the daily grind.

Helped along by your digital companion Erin and allies you'll meet along the way, this guide features advice on customising your character, exploring gender, developing your stats, managing tricky status effects like burnout, and even making friends and exploring relationships in multiplayer mode. In this guide you have all the strats, tips and tricks you need to thrive during all aspects of gameplay as a neurodivergent player. So, let's begin and establish a play style that works for you.

Genres: Nonfiction, Autistic Spectrum Disorder, Self Help, Mental Health, Adhd

144 pages, Kindle Edition

Published May 21, 2026

Reviews

[Lotta Z · Rating 1 out of 5]

Thank you to NetGalley and Jessica Kingsley Publishers for this ARC. All thoughts are my own.

DNF - I thought this book was going to be about Autism and ADHD exclusively BUT it's not. Gender and sexuality are being discussed early on and I didn't pick up this book for that sorry. I liked the idea of the book, but the subject matter should have been restricted to the title in my opinion.

Thanks for reading!

🤍🤍🤍

[Natalie all_books_great_and_small · Rating 3 out of 5]

I received an advance reader copy of this book to read in exchange for an honest review.

Stuck on Hard Mode is a self-help/information book for children/YA with ADHD, ASD and AuDHD told in a format of gaming which I'm sure will appeal to numerous children/YA and help them relate to the content told through a gaming narrative and language. The illustrations are fun and there is some good information within the book but what put me off the book and what I didn't think it contained when I requested it was the information relating to sexuality and gender which I do feel should be highlighted in the books information.

[Janine · Rating 4 out of 5]

Stuck on Hard Mode is a short how-to guide for teens (and maybe those older than teens) on the Autism Spectrum and/or ADHD to navigate a world built for neurotypical (NT) people. Based on the notion of these people living life on “hard mode”, comes a guide that sounds much like a MMORPG manual. Using terms like “level” for age, it’s written much like you’re playing a game, but in life.exe, you only have one and there’s no respawns. While this wording might appeal to a certain crowd, I didn’t entirely vibe with it, even though I’m a gamer. Otherwise, this is a great guide for teens to navigate the real world with their unique traits (termed stats) and how to make things easier in many aspects of life. I do like that the author is an older autistic that had to learn life without knowing they were on hard mode and speaks very much like a mentor. The most important thing is that the teens know that they aren’t broken, just different with their own challenges, which might seem harder in this NT world. Part of me wished this existed when I was a teen. Highly recommended!
*I received an ARC from Netgalley and Jessica Kingsley Publishers. All opinions are my own.*

[Kasey Szamatulski · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you Netgalley and Jessica Kingsley Pubslishers for the advanced reader's copy!

As someone who is AuDHD, this book feels so wonderful to have! For a long time, I've searched books about Autism and ADHD to help me improve my life. While the advice would overlap, there wasn't much about someone with both conditions. In fact, some sources drew a hard line between the two-urging readers not to mix up the two conditions due to similar symptoms. What is a someone with AuDHD -essentially mixed up-to do? Wait for a book like this to come out!

I loved the explanation of life-as Life.exe the game we are all playing. However, the game was built for the neurotypical (NT) folks with neurodiverse (ND) folks feeling like broken NT builds. Yet this book helps show that is not the case-we can thrive and win at our Main Quest-whatever that is for folks that are Autistic, ADHDers, and AuDHDers. It's a matter of knowing how the mind works and working with it to help us thrive-it's not a matter of pushing ourselves to Burnout status to match others. With the game analogy, it really breaks down aspects of Austitic, ADHD, and AuDHD life-such as various stats and statuses- such Luck being level of privilege, Bandwidth being mental energy and Burnout being a status that you can recover from if you truly take care of yourself. Knowing that I’m not a broken NT, just a different build as an AuDHDer is so nice and comforting!
For a target audience, I’d say this would mainly be more middle school/ young adult mainly because the examples use characters or ‘builds’, that are either trying to get into university, struggling in class, or in relationships. Most of the art depicts teenagers/young adults as well. Still, I fell like it could be good for any age willing to learn about Autism, ADHD, and AuDHD.

Overall, I highly recommend this to anyone with Autism, ADHD, or both, or to family and friends that want to understand the neurodiverse in their life. I really look forward to seeing this book in stores!

[Laurla2 · Rating 5 out of 5]

-5 stars. written by an AuDHD gamer and uses gaming related metaphors and analogies throughout the book. has a glossary in front to help with those gaming terms.

-bandwidth - amount of energy and endurance a person has to work with to get through their day. varies from person to person. determines the amount of interaction of which they are capable of, and how quickly a players mental energy is consumed. [like spoon theory]
-burnout - result of accumulation of stress, overwhelm, and exhaustion from everyday activities. burnout leaves a persons energy depleted and lowers their threshold to be able to function and perform normal tasks.

-compares neurotypical (NT) as a game player whose stats are well balanced, and neurodiverse (ND) as one whose stats are unevenly distributed, leaving them with big penalties in some areas, and bonuses in others. they struggle to keep up with same-level players because they're playing on hard mode compared to NTs. (the game is "life")
-ND traits are often assumed to be character flaws rather than evidence of disability.
-compares the difficulty of getting services, accommodations, and medications to slogging thru repetitious boring side quests. not easy, you have to do them multiple times, and it takes a lot of time and energy.
-NTs accuse you of cheating when you get accommodations.
-NT players have never experienced the game in the same way you have, and will probably never understand how much of a struggle it is to compete with others who are always better equipped for the challenges thrown at them. NTs sometimes need reminding that not all players of life are just like them.

-sensory processing disorder - the senses are not heightened, instead the way the brain processes and filters outside stimuli fails. where an NT brain would filter out extraneous sensory information (the hum of overhead lights, the noise of someone talking on the phone in another room, etc), the ND brain doesn't filter these out, meaning that those noises are more easily overwhelming.

-emotional dysregulation - the player experiences an emotion but can't properly process the emotion in real time in order to respond to it thoughtfully or with any kind of restraint. the players brain, instead, only allows the player a limited set of instinctual reactions (such as fight, flight, or freeze). these instinctual reactions tend to complicate things, making quests even more difficult than they need to be.

-rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD) - being so terrified of rejection that you won't ask the person out on a date to begin with. a feeling like you've done something wrong, or that someone is mad at you for the most inane reasons. RSD turns a text saying "maybe but i need to check to make sure" into "lol, probably not, i'm hoping someone better will want to go with me. i may deign to go on your silly quest as a last resort, though." [omg there's a name for this bullshit my brain does to me?!!]

-the ASD build is one of extremes. an ASD player with low perception may not register certain external (or even internal) stimuli at all and are considered hyposensitive. ASD with high perception are more aware of the sensations of the world around them and are seen as hypersensitive. they may have a problem with the brightness always seeming too be set too high, even indoors. they may have issues with sound, picking up high pitched noises from electronics that others seem to no hear, or finding the sounds of a particular location (grocery store) to be too loud and overwhelming. the texture of certain foods may make them gag. or perhaps they struggle with the daily quest of brushing their teeth, either because of the taste or texture of the toothpaste, or the noise of the bristles scrubbing their teeth. hyposensitive players may seek out big sensory experiences like listening to very loud music, burn fragrant candles, take very hot baths, ride roller coasters. players may also have poor interoception, which is when your body tells you things such as that you are hungry or thirsty, or have to use the bathroom. it can help pinpoint where pain is coming from when they are feeling unwell. it can cause toileting accidents because they may not get the urge to use the bathroom until it is almost or already too late.

-physical distractions like feeling hungry or restlessness can result in a penalty to mental bandwidth, as can worry and anxiety. the less mental bandwidth you have, the less information you can focus on at one time.

-players with ADHD tend to have a higher than average neurodexterity score. they are more creative, flexible thinkers with open minds and innovative ways of looking at things. they interact with the world in a different way than the NT player. they have a very different way of thinking about the world as well. ADHD players are great at coming up with new and different ideas or approaching existing ideas from a novel angle. the phrase 'to think outside the box' is a common trait. often the ADHD player never even noticed the box in the first place.

-previous versions of the DSM told mental health professionals that patients could have one disorder or the other, but not both autism and ADHD. only recently was it accepted as possible to have both.

-up until recently, studies done on people with ASD or ADHD only involved young middle class white boys. instead of being diagnosed, anyone of a different color, sex, or age, was labeled a trouble maker rather than being properly diagnosed. females were often labeled 'gifted, but quirky', and have a much lower chance of being given the correct diagnosis for their neurodivergence than boys despite the same level of privilege. girls' ND conditions manifest differently than their male counterparts. female tend to present with less outright behavioral problems such as defiance and hyperactivity, and more social awkwardness, which is interpreted as being shy. they are often seen as being a daydreamer, airhead, or space cadet when they fail to pay attention or are unable to focus.

-ND people have been convinced by NT society that their ND traits are simply moral failings and laziness, and if they “only worked harder”...
but it feels AWFUL to be trying your absolute best but still struggling with something, only to be told that
“you're obviously not working hard enough”.
other common, very unhelpful, very ableist phrases aimed at undiagnosed ND players include:
“everyone struggles with procrastination. you need to stop being so lazy.”
“you can do it if you just set your mind to it!”
“stop making excuses!”
“making friends is easy - just talk to people!”
“just eat it - you're acting like a baby.”
“stop doing that - you're embarrassing me.”
“you're being disrespectful! look me in the eye when i'm talking to you!”

-some days i feel extra autistic - sensory stimuli are more bothersome, or stress is causing me to be less vocal, and pushing me towards a shutdown. on my ADHD-dominant days i can talk nonstop, but if you ask me what i told you five minutes ago, it will already be forgotten because i can't hold a single thought in my head for more than two seconds before it is replaced by another. sometimes i feel both extra autistic and overwhelmingly ADHD and i don't know which traits i'm displaying come from which neurodivergence, because ASD and ADHD can cause similar behaviors, but for different reasons.

-high functioning ASD build, when struggling, often don't have their needs taken seriously, or sometimes, even acknowledged - they're often just seen as being over-dramatic, or as using autism as a scapegoat for personal failings.

-burnout is the result of an accumulation of stress, overwhelm, and exhaustion from everyday activities, which causes a bandwidth-depleting penalty over a period of time. once the bandwidth stat drops all the way down to zero, burnout is initiated, and all the players stats are negatively impacted. the player becomes unable to function at the level to which those around them have been accustomed, sometimes even to the point of being unable to leave their home. burnout can even be (unwittingly) self-inflicted, by trying to work on more career or personal projects, or volunteer more, or have more quests simultaneously active than the players mental bandwidth allows for. because ND players experience life on a higher level of difficulty than NT players, the stress, overwhelm, and exhaustion accumulate much more quickly, and take more time to recuperate from than they do for NT players.
-burnout can be reversed, but it takes time, and a lot of rest and self-care. even after recuperating fully, players should be careful not to overextend themselves, because after being burnt out once, they are more susceptible to it happening again.

-the meltdown effect is caused when acute overwhelm becomes too much for the players perception stat to handle. the meltdown is one of the most well-known aspects of autism, unfortunately, and NT players tend to wrongly equate them to temper tantrums. while they may appear similar from the outside, meltdowns and temper tantrums are NOT the same thing. temper tantrums are usually sparked by a player not getting their way. they are done for attention, and are used to manipulate others into giving them what they want. sometimes having their routine disrupted is the straw that breaks the autistic camel's back, so to speak, causing a meltdown. but it is never just the one instigating stressor that triggers meltdown, there is always more behind it. tension from something like sensory issues or social communication problems will have been building up within the ND player - sometimes for an entire day - and the disappointment or anxiety caused by something not going how they anticipated is what finally causes the emotional overload. another big difference between the meltdown effect and a tantrum is that tantrums are done consciously, with intention, while meltdowns are an instinctual response to stress, and not something the player has control over. meltdowns are exhausting, and they tend to wind down on their own once the player has had a chance to physically work out all the stress and tension they've been holding in.

-the shutdown effect is triggered by the same things that can cause a meltdown. if you are familiar with the concept of 'fight, flight, or freeze', a meltdown is an exaggerated fight or flight response, while a shutdown is the ND version of freezing. the difference between the two status effects is that instead of lashing out when pushed past their breaking point, players experiencing the shutdown status effect shrink inward. they have a hard time putting together thoughts or sentences (sometimes temporarily becoming completely non-vocal), and may even dissociate, which means their mind may feel disconnected from their body, or they may feel like they're dreaming. like the meltdown effect, the shutdown effect will usually go away on its own. however, it can sometimes take longer to come out of, because it is not physically exhausting the way a meltdown is. a meltdown is like a fire that burns itself out. a shutdown is like something that's been frozen solid having to fully defrost.

-public areas are almost always optimized for the convenience and comfort of the NT player. until the mindset of the NT player base around disability accommodation changes enough that accommodating the needs of ND players becomes the norm, it is going to have to be an ND player's job to either self-accommodate, or to self-advocate when they require accommodation and none is provided. self-accommodations include sunglasses or a brimmed hat to help with too much brightness, or even an oversized hoodie if the hood is large enough to pull partway over your forehead. for audio sensitivities, noise dampening devices such as ear plugs, ear defenders, or noise cancelling headphones.
[i wish there were more quiet rooms available in public spaces to go to when overwhelmed by all the people.]

-ambient noise and multiple conversations taking place around them can cause ND players with sensory sensitivities to become incredibly overwhelmed because we often aren't able to block out all the extraneous noise and distractions to focus on one noise, or one voice in particular.
-some ND players will even have difficulties processing the spoken word when there is no competing noise to distract them, auditory processing disorder. there can be a lot of lag time between the words being spoken and your brain processing their correct meaning.
-unfortunately while there are subtitles in the game of life, they are only a thing (sometimes) added to the media we consume. we don't have subtitles floating below us, writing out our words in real time. that would be pretty convenient for the deaf and hard of hearing, and players with auditory processing issues.

-for ND players with sensory sensitivities such as ASD or AuDHD builds, being comfortable is more of a requirement in order for the player to be able to function in any capacity. its hard to get anything done, or focus on anything important when the clothes you're wearing make you feel the need to scratch off your epidermis, keep sliding off or falling down, or are so tight that you fear one wrong move will see you popping out of your clothes like biscuit dough out of a can. ND players need to pay close attention to what material an item of clothing is made from, and how well it fits the player. preferences vary widely, so it may take a little time to figure out which materials are 'safe' materials, and which give you the squicks. and pay attention to tags.
-ill fitting clothes, especially when they're too tight, can come with a penalty to your perception and/or bandwidth stats, so wearing tight pants means you're unable to concentrate on anything but how uncomfortable you are all day. when you get home you nearly cry with relief as you peel off the offending pants.
-'same-clothes-ing' is the practice of buying, and subsequently wearing multiple identical articles of clothing, perhaps differing only in color or pattern.

-the ND player who struggles with regulating their emotions might have a reaction to being upset that seems disproportionate in both intensity and duration, such as a meltdown or shutdown. any emotion an ND player feels can easily become overwhelming, especially if they are unable to filter out other stimuli. it is surprising how quickly seemingly minor sensory annoyances can add up until they are completely unbearable, particularly when intense emotions, either good or bad, are being felt simultaneously.
-because ASD, ADHD, and AuDHD builds tend towards emotional dysregulation, many of us use self-stimulatory (stimming) behavior as a coping mechanism. moving our bodies in ways we find soothing can help distract us from intense feelings. it is something familiar and predictable to focus on in an unpredictable world.
- stimming doesn't have to involve big movements. even humming or otherwise vocalizing can be a type of stim. you may stim and not even realize it. do you fidget with your hands or feet a lot? do you catch yourself chewing on the inside of your cheek? do you compulsively bite your fingernails or pick at your cuticles? do you find yourself rocking or swaying in your seat? how about flapping your hands when excited or upset? these are all stimming behaviors.
-think of them as a type of maintenance. when we are able to perform regular maintenance, it helps our emotional regulation software run more smoothly.

-unregulated emotions can cause ND players to implode, which can take the form of self harm or self-injurious behaviors (SIBs, which are less consciously intended than self-harm, and tend to happen during the throes of a meltdown). both are coping mechanisms for emotional regulation, just like stimming. when an ND player who needs to stim to regulate their emotions but is kept from doing so, they will sometimes turn to self-harm when their emotions become so intense that it seems only physical pain will drown them out. during meltdown effect, when everything, not just emotion, is being felt too intensely, the overwhelmed brain is looking for the quickest way to get the bad feelings out. the ND brain has a preference for physical sensations over emotional ones. when a meltdown is allowed to fully play out, the player usually feels better when it is over. self-harm brings the same relief, though it will only be temporary, because the root issue causing the self-harm (emotional dysregulation) isn't addressed. instead, stim your hearts out! get the negative feelings out of your body through movement, making noise, or getting sensory gratification through touch, sight, smell, or even taste.
-stimming suggestions: online videos for those who stim visually or aurally like ASMR or soap cutting. fidget spinner. hard candy, mints, sour candy, or candy to crunch on. stickers to stick and unstick on hands, or a roll of tape. noise cancelling headphones. stimmy music or videos. shuffle playing cards. rubbing a soft velvety feeling plushie. chewing gum, or a therapeutic rubber chewy or chewelry. a smooth rock or worry stone. scented lotion. a small notepad or sketchbook to draw or color or doodle.

-it seems like NT players get more flustered at the idea that ND builds aren't "successful" at life than the ND players themselves. they tend to think of ND builds as "bugged NT builds" in need of fixing. that's where they're wrong. ND builds aren't bugged. we're just differently specced. ND builds would probably seem a lot less "disabled" if NTs really took note of our individual ND play styles and accommodated us, instead of trying to force ND players to play life as if we're simply glitched NTs. my player character is not bugged, and my build is not faulty. i may not be specced for success such as the NTs see it, and the quests i choose may not have the kind of outcome that NT builds want and often get - but that's okay. i can still play the game successfully and have a good time while at it. ND builds don't have to do anything extraordinary to have value - they just have to be themselves.

-socializing online seems to come more easily to ND people than socializing in person. theres no awkward eye contact required, you dont have to worry about people standing too close and invading your personal space. you don't have to worry about tripping over words because you have time to type them out and reread them before sending.

-many young players struggling with their main quest are trying to fit themselves into someone else's idea of what their main quest should be, rather than choosing their own path. sometimes it is a parent, a mentor, a teacher, almost always with good intentions. but they assume they know what is best for you without taking your wants, needs, or goals into account. your main quest is supposed to keep you engaged with and enjoying your time in life. your main quest is yours, and you can decide to change its trajectory at any point in life. you are the one who chooses how you play the game. 'winning' is based on your own set of criteria. criteria you can change at any time. winning at life comes down to enjoying your experience.
-the goal of life is not a perfect outcome, but the fun of character development along the way.
-the balance point between hope and despair is often simply feeling in control of your main quest.

[Joseph · Rating 2 out of 5]

clearly, the book is for younger readers. so it’s shallow depth is probably defensible. and the truth is we don’t know much about why brains work how they do. so perhaps there’s nothing satisfactory to say about underlying mechanisms. but i found myself struggling to make sense of the surface level descriptions of neurotypes without more context. for example, there are long passages describing how someone with adhd might struggle with a task, such as cleaning their room. and they’re grounded in this metaphor from video game character creation about cognitive trait scores. you have a low bandwidth score, so you get overwhelmed and spin your wheels, never making progress on the room. and while the point is clear, what does it mean to have a low bandwidth score? why do people with ADHD have lower bandwidth scores? how does this happen? why does that mechanism produce the observed experience? i’m an adult with children with adhd, so this part of the story is just as important to me as the stories about day to day life. i can see that they struggle to clean their room. it’s not that helpful to have a name for that “low bandwidth”. it would be more helpful to have a deeper causal story.

i should also say that some of the writing is less objective. theres a passage where the author differentiates “tantrums” from “meltdowns” that struck me as weird for example. i have never thought of “tantrums” as willful attempts at manipulation. perhaps other people use the word in that sense. it’s not defined that way in any dictionary i checked. and the distinction doesn’t really help with any practical question. ok fine, lets call it a meltdown. does that change anything about how to handle them?

another example of this is the condescending tone about “NT” players and how they perceive ND players. for example, neurotypical people “have an unfortunate tendency to treat ND behavior as a moral failure.”

at best, this is probably because of their own cognitive limitations and oversights, right? the implication is clearly that this is kind of a scumbag, ignorant ND attitude, when in reality it’s more just another way the two life experiences differ and produce conflict for the two player types. i dunno, not great.

[Paula · Rating 3 out of 5]

Stuck on Hard Mode by Erin Phillips is a unique and interesting take on being neurodivergence in a neurotypical world. The book reads like a manual for how to succeed in the game of life. or Life.exe as referenced in the book. It is written as an instructional guide that explains traits as character mods, factions, player builds, etc. The content is broken into small snippets of information that are easily digestible with black and white images of animated video game simulations dispersed throughout the book. The book discusses ADHD, Autism, AuDHD, gender and more. The book is somewhat autobiographical as well as instructive.

I found myself reading the book wondering who the ideal audience would be for such a book. A typical reader may not be a video game or Dungeons and Dragons (DnD player). They may not even be a fantasy or science fiction reader. Even if they are, the author introduces metaphoric characters and situations that seem to get in the way of understanding these neurodivergent challenges. They use world-building to create case study characters and familiar scenarios that will be referred to later in the text. Suggesting that a reader must have a strong mental recall and mental processing capabilities to digest the text. There were times where it felt like I needed a cheat sheet to understand what the author was trying to describe. On the most basic level, I understood the information. It seems that the author is very passionate about character-building, world-building and video games. The way it was described felt extraneous and cumbersome. It was difficult to fully read without feeling that I needed to do mental gymnastics to keep up with the book's jargon.

I appreciate the author's attempts at making the population's challenges feel relatable through a shared interest. Despite the information overload, the book's purpose is commendable. The book will find an audience. Every book has a reader. It will just take a reader with strong working memory recall, a passion for sci-fi and/or fantasy games, a background in character building, is neurodivergent and/or knows someone who is a part of the population.

[Angela · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thanks to Jessica Kingsley Publishers for providing an e-ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Stuck on Hard Mode by Erin Phillips is a funny guide for autistic people playing the game of life. Presenting life as a game, it is a strategy guide to help ADHD/autistic teens live a life that feels much harder to navigate than for neurotypical people. It covers topics such as gender and self-expression; dealing with burnout, meltdowns and time blindness; taking care of your sensory and emotional needs; and much more.

I am not a teen, so I am not the intended audience for this book, but having read a lot of advice and self help books for autistic people, I feel that the author has done a good job selecting and presenting advice that is relevant to teens, and presents it in a way that I would have found tremendously helpful when I was younger.

I find myself being very excited about this book being for both ADHD teens as well as autistic teens (and those that are both), because a lot of the advice that is out there tends to be aimed at either one or the other. I would not be surprised if this book being about both might lead some teens to realise that they might not be only one of the two, but in fact both.

Each chapter is divided into fairly short sections and subsections, which makes it an accessible read, and also has some asides with additional facts and Helpful Hints. The end of every chapter has a short summary, which really helps to lock in the most important parts of the text (separating out the main points in a text is something that some autistic people struggle with!).

The only drawback that I noticed while reading is that the author talks about both life as a game metaphorically, but also about actual games. This is sometimes a little bit confusing while reading, but does not ultimately stand in the way of good advice.

I would recommend this book to any nerdy autistic/ADHD teen that needs some guidance about living lives that work for them.

[Sophia Bernard · Rating 5 out of 5]

THE PERFECT BOOK FOR ADHD NERDS

I am the target audience. I understand not everyone relates or understands DND or video game terms, but this is for ME. THIS WAS PERFECT FOR ME. This book is genuinely the best ADHD book I’ve picked up out of DOZENS. And that is BECAUSE of the usage of DND and video game terms. I was GIDDY when going through the book. You used art, comics, storytelling, and terms that I found engaging.

I’m 20 years old, so still on that cusp of adult and child, and struggling with depression and ADHD. It’s a fight to get out of bed and do the things I love, let alone fix my life. But, to get out of bed, I need a self help book.

I’ve saved DOZENS of books, guides, videos, blogs, and other resources for ADHD. I’ve never touched any. And if I do, it’s only a few pages. It’s so difficult to force myself to SIT DOWN and just READ. So I don’t.

BUT: I love video games and DND. Yes, it’s sad that I have to bribe myself to read a book by making it ‘fun’ but OH MY GOSH DID THAT WORK.

As someone who is absolutely the target audience and understood all the terms: I was GIDDY to read this. ABSOLUTELY I’d rather read about an adventuring party -with GENUINE storytelling like I’m watching someone recount their DND adventure- than read about someone’s struggle with balancing motherhood and a law degree. I can’t relate to that yet. And yes, I’m childish. It’s boring. YES I absolutely prefer to read about an adventuring party.

TO THE PARENTS OF ADHD KIDS: Get this book. My mom bought me a pile of books about habits, executive function, smart teen guide, how to- and I read NONE of them. It’s attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. It’s hard to pay attention to stuff we don’t find interesting. This book, and others like it, are what WORK.

(Oh, and- I guess all these thoughts are mine? Idk I saw other people saying that.)

[Lizzy · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.75 ARC (Thank you NetGalley!)

Basically, this is the book I wish I had read when I was a kid.

An Autism/ADHD diagnosis can be anxiety-inducing, especially with the overwhelming vocabulary (and functionality) of it all. Enter this book: explaining neurodivergence using video game metaphors is incredibly clear and relatable. I really appreciate that the book focuses on both Autism and ADHD, showing that there can be a link between these categories. The overall tone of the book is empowering: The idea that neurodivergent people are not broken, just have different “stats.” I also particularly appreciated the section where the author encourages readers to stim if they need to (and offers many suggestions for how to do this covertly if readers are concerned about attracting attention).

My only question is why there wasn’t a quick note at the beginning of the book stating that not all sections may be appropriate for every reader (and that that’s okay). For example, I would feel comfortable recommending this book to a nine year old, but not if they aren’t ready to digest the lengthy section on sexuality. To be clear, the book is very encouraging and repeatedly reminds readers that everyone is different, however, I think some young readers may stop reading if they feel a section is not applicable to them (yet?).

For some young readers, this book will really speak to them and give them great insight into how they move through the world. The author uses “us” and “we,” which makes the tone welcoming and lets the reader know from the very beginning that they are not alone in facing the world (a great message for anyone).

[Emily · Rating 4 out of 5]

Stuck on Hard Mode is a 144-page extended metaphor, and while that metaphor occasionally falters, overall I found it surprisingly effective (and that's speaking as a very casual gamer). The one step remove from the way information about neurodivergence is typically communicated helps the same information to feel fresh and engaging and, perhaps more importantly, it does quite a good job of separating the experiences of neurodivergence from value judgments. Doing so allows readers the space to consider what fits them and what doesn't, and to gather helpful tips from a neurodivergent mentor when they find something that resonates.

As for content, the book will likely best fit the interests of older teens, as especially the later chapters put a fair amount of emphasis on considering possibilities for adult life and learning skills necessary for independence. However, there's plenty of information on topics that will be relevant to younger (and older) readers as well, such as exploring your identity, understanding and meeting your needs for different types of accommodations, and how different kinds of ADHD medications function if your doctor suggests giving them a try. The book has a lot of potential to grow with a young reader, meeting different needs at different stages. I also really liked that the book both included and differentiated autism, ADHD, and combined AuDHD throughout—something that's still rare in the proliferation of guides to neurodivergent life we've seen on shelves lately.

*I received an advance copy of Stuck on Hard Mode from NetGalley and Jessica Kingsley Publishers for review purposes. My opinions are my own.*

[Shilo Quetchenbach · Rating 5 out of 5]

I (AuDHD) read this with my 12you AuDHD kid. We read it at bedtime over a few weeks, and he really seemed to resonate with it. It probably helps that he loves video games, D&D, and fantasy books.

His review: 5 stars. It was both interesting and useful. It had a lot of facts in it. I didn't have any problems understanding the video game metaphors.

My review: 4.5 rounded up to 5 stars. It had a lot of vital information for ADHD, ASD, and AuDHD kids and teens to help them navigate life and understand themselves. I especially like that it includes a short section about gender and sexuality because that's something teens are figuring out and despite some people thinking we should keep them in the dark, it's really a lot easier if you have words to describe your experience. I also really like that it includes a section on activism because, again, that's something teens can relate to.

I did feel that it got a little bogged down in the video game metaphors at times, but overall the author did a great job translating neurodivergent experiences into video game speak. It may just be that I am not as into video games as my kid so I found it harder to parse.

I have been highly impressed with every Jessica Kingsley Publishers title I've picked up, and this is no exception.

*Thanks to NetGalley and Jessica Kingsley Publishers for providing an early copy for review.

[Janneke]

I really wanted to like this book. I think it could be a very helpful resource to many people, especially teenagers with autism or ADHD. Part of what makes this book stand out from others like it, is that it describes everything as if life is a video game. This drew my attention and made me pick it up, but sadly also got tiring very quickly for me. I guess I'm not familiar enough with video game terms, because I kept having to consciously think about what that related to in real life. The book does start with a comprehensive glossary of all the terms used, but having to go back to look at that or think about it, made this book take more mental energy than I have to spend currently and made me not want to pick it up to continue. I do still think this book could be great for many people, but I'm definitely not one of them.

*I received this book through Netgalley*

[Ashley · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was really excited for this book as someone who loves video games and is neurodivergent. I hoped it would bring those two worlds together and even become something I could share with my daughter when she is older. Unfortunately, the book fell short for me.

The gaming analogies did not always translate well for me. Some sections felt like a lot was being said without actually offering clear or actionable insight. I also felt the book drifted away from what I thought its core purpose would be at times, which made it harder to stay engaged.

I can see this book being more helpful for young adults, particularly those who are just beginning to learn about neurodiversity.

I received an advance reader copy of this book in exchange for an honest review via Netgalley.

[Savannah · Rating 5 out of 5]

This short book has some incredibly helpful language and tools for my (very) neurodivergent family to use.

I especially appreciate the discussions of gender identity and sexuality and how ADHD/Autism/AuDHD interact and inform these, how burnout happens more quickly and takes longer to recover from, and the importance of just acknowledging that life can be harder and we might need different strategies or accommodations to accomplish the same goals as neurotypical folks.

[Ultan · Rating 1 out of 5]

Would have given this a 2.5 to 3 star but the author really seems to enforce or subscribe to the idea that some people are privileged because of their skin colour or gender. As a late diagnosed autistic male I resent being told that I should have or was more likely to have an easier time growing up. I'm not sure if this was the author's intention but to me it came across that way. I recommend Autism for Adults by Dan Jones over this.

[daquackz · Rating 5 out of 5]

It was a nice reading. For the first time in 19 levels, I felt understood (mostly). At the beginning, I wasn't sure if I would made it with the game analogy but it made it easier to keep up with! I'm storing some practical advices. And overall, the sense of me not being a wrong fabricated alien. Thank you, Erin ᕦ⁠(⁠ò⁠_⁠ó⁠ˇ⁠)⁠ᕤ

[Melissa Orth]

Decent self help book on how to deal with being AuADHD. Read it for the awards committee I’m on but it didn’t really fit the criteria. Likens navigating one’s neuro-spiciness to playing video games, which may not work for everyone.

[Geoff Lehr · Rating 3 out of 5]

Personally, I didn't care for the framing of life-as-video game. I can see how it may be helpful or engaging for others.

I also went in hoping for more tools, but it was more an overview or introduction. If that's what you're looking for, this will be helpful. If not, less so.

[Nick Salenga · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a great book that offers guidance on managing everyday tasks, self-care, routines, relationships, identity, and challenges such as burnout.

[Bookbubble · Rating 5 out of 5]

Stuck on Hard Mode is one of the more original ways I’ve seen ADHD and autism explained for a general audience.

Erin Phillips uses video game logic, especially MMORPG language, to make neurodiversity easier to understand without flattening it into baby talk. Side quests, quest chains, buffs, debuffs, power-ups, and power-ons become a framework for attention, energy, medication, relationships, and daily functioning. The structure is clear, and the analogies hold up.

The strongest example is the comparison between stimulants as fast-acting power-ups and non-stimulants or antidepressants as slower power-ons. It’s a simple distinction, but it explains the difference well. The relationship material also stands out, especially where romance and social dynamics are framed as side quests or quest lines. That approach makes abstract social material more concrete.

This is an introductory book, but it covers more than the standard ADHD basics. Phillips gets into masking, late diagnosis, gender identity, racism, and socioeconomic status, and shows how those factors shape the neurodivergent experience. The overlap between ADHD and autism is also handled in a way that adds useful context rather than repeating the same surface-level explanations.

A lot of the core material was familiar to me, but the framing gave it a sharper angle, and I still picked up new things, especially in the autism sections. The illustrations were a good addition, and the doodle page at the end was a nice touch.

[Silas · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is an introduction to some of the issues that neurodivergent people might have which is framed in the metaphor of a video game, specifically an MMO video game. This is a special interest of the author, and it shows. While I haven't often played a game like she describes in her examples (kind of a space-based roleplaying game), I recognized a lot of both game elements and lived experiences, and the metaphor holds well. I do find that the book is oriented towards a younger reader, a bit, and I was a bit surprised at how little time it spent on relationships, both platonic and romantic. They are mentioned, but very little time is spent on the ways that neurodivergence might affect them. Perhaps a future book might deal with that more. Since this is not my first book on autism or ADHD, I knew a fair bit of this, and it didn't go deeper than I was already familiar with. Still, it is a great introduction for someone who is new to the topic, but familiar with video games even in a basic way (though if they love them, it will be even more enthusiastically received).