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Afraid to Feel
145 pages, Paperback
Published July 21, 2025
1 person is currently reading
8 people want to read
About the author
Alex Tucker
1 book4 followersAlex Tucker is an HWA writer from the Appalachian Mountains of Virginia. His novella Afraid to Feel recently debuted through Alien Buddha Press, and two more books are scheduled for publication in 2026 and 2027. Alex’s short fiction has been featured in Occupying Bodies from Black Hare Press, Carols for the Dead from Desiree Horton, and Creepy Podcast’s daily Patreon. Others will be included in upcoming works from Inky Bones Press, Burial Books, and SGNL Magazine. He is also a blog contributor for Burial Books. Prior to becoming a full-time author, Alex worked as an engineer in various locations around the globe. He currently lives in Japan with his wife and their two cats, returning to the US in 2026.
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Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews
October 20, 2025
Have you ever woken up suddenly from a dream and had to spend a few minutes working out what was real and what wasn't? If so, then boy do I have a little treat for you.
Cory is a middle aged, married, father of 2. He should have it all, but his marriage and family life is at risk due to his emotional unavailability. His wife has had enough. Therapy hasn't changed anything and he starts to realise that he may lose everything that is dear to him. That is, unless he finally tells her the truth about him. The truth about his life, his childhood. The truth about his dreams and the reason he is closed off from his emotions. But the truth may not be what it seems as the lines between reality and the dream-world blur.
I was lucky enough to come across Steph's Creepy Reads call for readers for her October Indie-Tron event celebrating indie authors. I was even luckier that Afraid to Feel by Alex Tucker was the book I received to read as part of this event. At only 145 pages long this can easily be read in one sitting, which I did as it had me hooked from the start. It's more a psychological thriller with a side order of existential crisis, than a horror. Tucker does a brilliant job of exploring the ways in which our dreams can manifest, or bleed into and affect our reality. There were definitely moments where I was unsure about what was Cory's reality and what was a dream, which, at times, gave the story an almost ethereal feel and definitely created a lot of tension. Tucker also uses this story to highlight the importance of emotional health and how there is power in feeling the big stuff, and not suppressing or stifling your feelings. Also, I did not see that twist coming at all!! A thoroughly enjoyable read and I would highly recommend.
Thank you to Alex Tucker for the review copy and to Steph's Creepy Reads for creating such a fab Indie-Tron event! Indie books rule!
Cory is a middle aged, married, father of 2. He should have it all, but his marriage and family life is at risk due to his emotional unavailability. His wife has had enough. Therapy hasn't changed anything and he starts to realise that he may lose everything that is dear to him. That is, unless he finally tells her the truth about him. The truth about his life, his childhood. The truth about his dreams and the reason he is closed off from his emotions. But the truth may not be what it seems as the lines between reality and the dream-world blur.
I was lucky enough to come across Steph's Creepy Reads call for readers for her October Indie-Tron event celebrating indie authors. I was even luckier that Afraid to Feel by Alex Tucker was the book I received to read as part of this event. At only 145 pages long this can easily be read in one sitting, which I did as it had me hooked from the start. It's more a psychological thriller with a side order of existential crisis, than a horror. Tucker does a brilliant job of exploring the ways in which our dreams can manifest, or bleed into and affect our reality. There were definitely moments where I was unsure about what was Cory's reality and what was a dream, which, at times, gave the story an almost ethereal feel and definitely created a lot of tension. Tucker also uses this story to highlight the importance of emotional health and how there is power in feeling the big stuff, and not suppressing or stifling your feelings. Also, I did not see that twist coming at all!! A thoroughly enjoyable read and I would highly recommend.
Thank you to Alex Tucker for the review copy and to Steph's Creepy Reads for creating such a fab Indie-Tron event! Indie books rule!
September 4, 2025
I wanted to give this a read since Alex will be joining me for an episode on my podcast, and I can, without a doubt, say I devoured this book.
When I read the description for it, I was highly intrigued, especially because I’ve always found dreams and nightmares and that particular world fascinating.
What I didn’t expect from this book was to feel completely mind blown and questioning my own reality. (There were a lot of moments I questioned if I was awake or dreaming).
This story was conveyed well, with descriptions of dreams and nightmares that I think gave the story so much life. It was like watching a movie in my head as I read.
The ending was something I didn’t see coming and didn’t expect. The way he brought it all to an end was a great closing of Corey’s story.
I highly recommend this if you want a book that will not only keep you wondering but also have you questioning reality along the way.
When I read the description for it, I was highly intrigued, especially because I’ve always found dreams and nightmares and that particular world fascinating.
What I didn’t expect from this book was to feel completely mind blown and questioning my own reality. (There were a lot of moments I questioned if I was awake or dreaming).
This story was conveyed well, with descriptions of dreams and nightmares that I think gave the story so much life. It was like watching a movie in my head as I read.
The ending was something I didn’t see coming and didn’t expect. The way he brought it all to an end was a great closing of Corey’s story.
I highly recommend this if you want a book that will not only keep you wondering but also have you questioning reality along the way.
September 2, 2025
This book is wonderful. This book is a psychological suspense. This was unexpected. 🤯 You must read. You will experience some sort of emotion. Well done Alex. 👏🏼
August 17, 2025
What a novella!!
I didn’t know much about this when I went into it (which I’d recommend) I just knew it was something got to do with feelings 👀
Where this story went took me by surprise but in the best possible way, it’s a short 143 page novella that really hits and makes your brain doubt a lot 😰 the only reason it’s not 5 ⭐️ is because I wanted more, having this being a full novel would be 🤌🏻 I was also a little gagged at the ending too because what?!?! 👀
Thanks to Alex for reaching out and sending me a copy to read!! 🖤
I didn’t know much about this when I went into it (which I’d recommend) I just knew it was something got to do with feelings 👀
Where this story went took me by surprise but in the best possible way, it’s a short 143 page novella that really hits and makes your brain doubt a lot 😰 the only reason it’s not 5 ⭐️ is because I wanted more, having this being a full novel would be 🤌🏻 I was also a little gagged at the ending too because what?!?! 👀
Thanks to Alex for reaching out and sending me a copy to read!! 🖤
November 11, 2025
⚠️ Trigger Warnings
Emotional abuse and workplace bullying (Protagonist is repeatedly belittled and humiliated by his boss in front of colleagues. These scenes may be distressing for readers sensitive to power imbalances or toxic work environments.)
Alcohol Dependence (Protagonist drinks nightly to suppress dreams and avoid emotional processing. Whilst not depicted as violent or chaotic, the routine is clearly compulsive and tied to unresolved trauma.)
Mental Health and Emotional Repression (The novel explores dissociation. emotional numbness, and the psychological toll of avoidance. The protagonist’s inability to express or process feelings affects his marriage and parenting.)
Childhood Trauma - non explicit (The protagonist references a traumatic event from his past, that shaped his emotional detachment. The details were withheld, buyt the impact is central to the story’s emotional arc.)
Martial Breakdown and Emotional Neglect (The protagonist’s wife' emotional distress and the strain of their relationship are portrayed with raw intensity. The children also express feelings of being ignored or emotionally disconnected from their father.)
Therapy and Mental Health Conversations (couple’s therapy, and individual sessions are part of the narrative, with realistic portrayals of emotional confrontation and vulnerability.)
PLEASE NOTE THIS BOOK WAS GIFTED TO ME AS PART OF Macabre Mortis Book Club - Find our little community here.
Book Background - Potential Spoilers Ahead!
The novel follows Cory Gardner (our protagonist), a programmer, whose life is defined by emotional avoidance and a fortess-like detachment from everyone around him, including his wife and children. At work, he endures the bullying from his toxic boss without any protest from his part, he would absorb every insult and belittling scenario until he’s forever internally scarred.
At home, his wife, Kate, and their daughters have their own struggles as the wall he has built around him seems impenetrable. He isn’t as present as he should be for his wife and children and this has significant impact on the family dynamic which is depicted throughout the book.
The narrative explores Cory’s inability, or refusal, to express emotion, tracing this back to a childhood trauma. His coping mechanisms include isolation, nightly functional (up for interpretation) alcoholism, and obsessive routines (like cooking with surgical precision). The story builds tension, not through the norm of gore, haunting horror, or supernatural monsters, but through the creeping dread of emotional decay, martial collapse and the haunting consequences of unprocessed trauma.
Ongoing Themes and Motifs
There’s emotional horror which is the main theme. The true horror lies within Cory’s numbness, and his silence and detachment become monstrous in their own right because they erode his marriage and destroy his family bonds,
Isolation Vs Connection: It’s Cory’s preference for solitude clashes with Kate’s insistence on growth and intimacy, created a chilling portrait of how avoidance can destroy relationships.
Dependence and Fragility: Kate becomes the “load bearer” in Cory’s emotional architecture, which highlights the danger of relying on one person to contain another person’s darkness and contempt.
Domestic Dread: Home life is toxic, the dinner table conversations, therapy sessions, and every day family life are infused with unease, showing how horror can thrive in the ordinary, every day, behind closed doors.
Personal Reflections
Alex Tucker’s prose is precise, deliberate and emotionally charged, mirroring Cory’s obsession with exactness (like his refusal to cook with “a dash” or “a pinch”). The tone is claustrophobic with long passages of internal reflections that make you, as the reader, feel trapped inside Cory’s impenetrable fortress of avoidance.
The horror in this is the psychological and existential, not the reliant on gore, cruelty, or demonic entities. This is what appeals to readers like myself who relish horror’s emotional resonance, but prefer to avoid depictions of animal or child abuse. I also tend to try and steer away from domestic violence or emotional abuse in a marriage where possible, but I did feel able to read this, but please read with care and remember your mental health comes first.
Tucker wisely keeps the experience of the children centred on emotional neglect, rather than physical harm, which maintains the tension without crossing into territory that may be distressing.
I absolutely loved the psychological depth, I appreciate a horror that digs into the human psyche rather than relying on scare factor or goriness. Cory’s emotional repression and it’s ripple effects are the kind of layered horror I tend to gravitate towards.
The novel transforms every day family life into a site of dread and toxicness. I love a horror that looks at the familiar, and real life events and scenarios. Tucker absolutely nails this.
This book has a slow-burn atmosphere, but not too much of a slow burn you find yourself wanting it to speed up or skip. You are drawn in and you don’t want to miss a page.
Afraid to Feel succeeds as an indie horror novel because it refines what horror can be, it’s not blood soaked gore and violence, but the suffocating terror of emotional paralysis. Tucker crafts an exceptional protagonist who is both sympathetic and terrifying, aa amana who’s refusal to feel becomes the monster haunting his own family.
For readers who love horror that is intimate, psychological and emotionally devastating, it’s standalone, in my opinion. It’s less about jump scares and more about the slow erosion of the love, trust, and connection. It’s a kind of horror that lingers long after it’s final page. It’s a chilling exploration of emotional avoidance and it’s destructive consequences. It’s a horror for readers who love depth, atmosphere and psychological unease that you know at any point could spill into the real life of you or someone you know. It makes you sit back and THINK.
Goodreads Review can be found here: Goodreads
Rating: ⭐⭐⭐☆☆ (3/5) Atmospheric and emotionally layered, but not quite nightmare fuel for the horror-hardened.
📚 Call to Action
If you’ve got horror book recommendations that could genuinely rattle a horrorcore veteran, I want them. Indie authors welcome, bonus points for originality and psychological depth. Just a heads-up: I tend to avoid books with repeated animal abuse. My TBR is hungry, and I’m ready to feed it something truly terrifying.
I’m asking you now to go seek out this book, support Alex and his artistry. You can find him on social media (linked below).
Instgram & Threads - @alextuckerwrites
Goodreads - https://www.goodreads.com/author/show...
Linktree - https://linktr.ee/alextuckerwrites
Emotional abuse and workplace bullying (Protagonist is repeatedly belittled and humiliated by his boss in front of colleagues. These scenes may be distressing for readers sensitive to power imbalances or toxic work environments.)
Alcohol Dependence (Protagonist drinks nightly to suppress dreams and avoid emotional processing. Whilst not depicted as violent or chaotic, the routine is clearly compulsive and tied to unresolved trauma.)
Mental Health and Emotional Repression (The novel explores dissociation. emotional numbness, and the psychological toll of avoidance. The protagonist’s inability to express or process feelings affects his marriage and parenting.)
Childhood Trauma - non explicit (The protagonist references a traumatic event from his past, that shaped his emotional detachment. The details were withheld, buyt the impact is central to the story’s emotional arc.)
Martial Breakdown and Emotional Neglect (The protagonist’s wife' emotional distress and the strain of their relationship are portrayed with raw intensity. The children also express feelings of being ignored or emotionally disconnected from their father.)
Therapy and Mental Health Conversations (couple’s therapy, and individual sessions are part of the narrative, with realistic portrayals of emotional confrontation and vulnerability.)
PLEASE NOTE THIS BOOK WAS GIFTED TO ME AS PART OF Macabre Mortis Book Club - Find our little community here.
Book Background - Potential Spoilers Ahead!
The novel follows Cory Gardner (our protagonist), a programmer, whose life is defined by emotional avoidance and a fortess-like detachment from everyone around him, including his wife and children. At work, he endures the bullying from his toxic boss without any protest from his part, he would absorb every insult and belittling scenario until he’s forever internally scarred.
At home, his wife, Kate, and their daughters have their own struggles as the wall he has built around him seems impenetrable. He isn’t as present as he should be for his wife and children and this has significant impact on the family dynamic which is depicted throughout the book.
The narrative explores Cory’s inability, or refusal, to express emotion, tracing this back to a childhood trauma. His coping mechanisms include isolation, nightly functional (up for interpretation) alcoholism, and obsessive routines (like cooking with surgical precision). The story builds tension, not through the norm of gore, haunting horror, or supernatural monsters, but through the creeping dread of emotional decay, martial collapse and the haunting consequences of unprocessed trauma.
Ongoing Themes and Motifs
There’s emotional horror which is the main theme. The true horror lies within Cory’s numbness, and his silence and detachment become monstrous in their own right because they erode his marriage and destroy his family bonds,
Isolation Vs Connection: It’s Cory’s preference for solitude clashes with Kate’s insistence on growth and intimacy, created a chilling portrait of how avoidance can destroy relationships.
Dependence and Fragility: Kate becomes the “load bearer” in Cory’s emotional architecture, which highlights the danger of relying on one person to contain another person’s darkness and contempt.
Domestic Dread: Home life is toxic, the dinner table conversations, therapy sessions, and every day family life are infused with unease, showing how horror can thrive in the ordinary, every day, behind closed doors.
Personal Reflections
Alex Tucker’s prose is precise, deliberate and emotionally charged, mirroring Cory’s obsession with exactness (like his refusal to cook with “a dash” or “a pinch”). The tone is claustrophobic with long passages of internal reflections that make you, as the reader, feel trapped inside Cory’s impenetrable fortress of avoidance.
The horror in this is the psychological and existential, not the reliant on gore, cruelty, or demonic entities. This is what appeals to readers like myself who relish horror’s emotional resonance, but prefer to avoid depictions of animal or child abuse. I also tend to try and steer away from domestic violence or emotional abuse in a marriage where possible, but I did feel able to read this, but please read with care and remember your mental health comes first.
Tucker wisely keeps the experience of the children centred on emotional neglect, rather than physical harm, which maintains the tension without crossing into territory that may be distressing.
I absolutely loved the psychological depth, I appreciate a horror that digs into the human psyche rather than relying on scare factor or goriness. Cory’s emotional repression and it’s ripple effects are the kind of layered horror I tend to gravitate towards.
The novel transforms every day family life into a site of dread and toxicness. I love a horror that looks at the familiar, and real life events and scenarios. Tucker absolutely nails this.
This book has a slow-burn atmosphere, but not too much of a slow burn you find yourself wanting it to speed up or skip. You are drawn in and you don’t want to miss a page.
Afraid to Feel succeeds as an indie horror novel because it refines what horror can be, it’s not blood soaked gore and violence, but the suffocating terror of emotional paralysis. Tucker crafts an exceptional protagonist who is both sympathetic and terrifying, aa amana who’s refusal to feel becomes the monster haunting his own family.
For readers who love horror that is intimate, psychological and emotionally devastating, it’s standalone, in my opinion. It’s less about jump scares and more about the slow erosion of the love, trust, and connection. It’s a kind of horror that lingers long after it’s final page. It’s a chilling exploration of emotional avoidance and it’s destructive consequences. It’s a horror for readers who love depth, atmosphere and psychological unease that you know at any point could spill into the real life of you or someone you know. It makes you sit back and THINK.
Goodreads Review can be found here: Goodreads
Rating: ⭐⭐⭐☆☆ (3/5) Atmospheric and emotionally layered, but not quite nightmare fuel for the horror-hardened.
📚 Call to Action
If you’ve got horror book recommendations that could genuinely rattle a horrorcore veteran, I want them. Indie authors welcome, bonus points for originality and psychological depth. Just a heads-up: I tend to avoid books with repeated animal abuse. My TBR is hungry, and I’m ready to feed it something truly terrifying.
I’m asking you now to go seek out this book, support Alex and his artistry. You can find him on social media (linked below).
Instgram & Threads - @alextuckerwrites
Goodreads - https://www.goodreads.com/author/show...
Linktree - https://linktr.ee/alextuckerwrites
January 23, 2026
This book follows a man who has thoroughly trapped his emotions. Afraid to feel, Afraid of the consequences, and Afraid of what will happen if he lets down his wall. This story is emotionally taut and mind bending. The end will have you questioning if you should be Afraid to Feel..
August 25, 2025
What a twist (ed) story! Great read! Now I wonder what’s next????
October 21, 2025
This definitely left me feeling unsettled.
Imagine if your dream world caused awful events to happen in your life. To the people you love. You'll never want to sleep again.
Imagine if your dream world caused awful events to happen in your life. To the people you love. You'll never want to sleep again.
January 15, 2026
Read it in 1 sitting as I needed to know what was going on. Several lines stood out to me as ones I wanted to underline. The fever dream feeling is captured so well. Psychologically Disorienting.
December 2, 2025
A powerful work about how many of us put up walls and isolate ourselves. And in this process, we lose our minds, identity, sense of reality. For how do we truly know who we are except through our interactions with other people? We are social creatures, after all. Without opening up to others, who are we really?
Unfortunately, I found myself identifying too much with this man who was terrified to sleep because he might slip into the nightmare realm. Who filled his nights with doomscrolling and watching horror movies and drinking to distract himself from his feelings and intrusive thoughts. Who shut out other people because of his fear of intimacy. Who put on a mask every day--a veneer of stability and happiness.
His remote work only adds to his loneliness and isolation. And even though he is witnessing his family fall apart--losing his connection with his wife and daughters--he continues to isolate himself.
Things take a weird turn when we realize why our protagonist Cory is afraid to feel and afraid to dream. As a child, his anger-fueled nightmares--directed at his brother--manifested themselves in reality. The dream world and the "real" world (is there a difference?) became one terrifying realm. Cory doesn't want to feel too strongly for fear that his dreams may hurt his current family.
Cory's child-like nightmares and their deadly real world consequences were the most terrifying aspect of this novella. His dreams reminded me of my own as a child: rooted in familial anxieties, combined with a consumption of Goosebumps and Are You Afraid of the Dark? And even today, I wonder about the influence of dreams on reality and vice versa. It's an intriguing premise that Alex Tucker explores throughout these pages with a tinge of disquieting nostalgia. A brilliant metaphor for buried trauma and the unhealthy habit of suppressing negative emotions. The fear of opening up. Afraid to feel.
This book horrified me and yet also gave me hope--that we can break down these walls and open up and fight our inner demons by allowing others in.
A beautiful, stunning piece of psychological fiction.
Unfortunately, I found myself identifying too much with this man who was terrified to sleep because he might slip into the nightmare realm. Who filled his nights with doomscrolling and watching horror movies and drinking to distract himself from his feelings and intrusive thoughts. Who shut out other people because of his fear of intimacy. Who put on a mask every day--a veneer of stability and happiness.
His remote work only adds to his loneliness and isolation. And even though he is witnessing his family fall apart--losing his connection with his wife and daughters--he continues to isolate himself.
Things take a weird turn when we realize why our protagonist Cory is afraid to feel and afraid to dream. As a child, his anger-fueled nightmares--directed at his brother--manifested themselves in reality. The dream world and the "real" world (is there a difference?) became one terrifying realm. Cory doesn't want to feel too strongly for fear that his dreams may hurt his current family.
Cory's child-like nightmares and their deadly real world consequences were the most terrifying aspect of this novella. His dreams reminded me of my own as a child: rooted in familial anxieties, combined with a consumption of Goosebumps and Are You Afraid of the Dark? And even today, I wonder about the influence of dreams on reality and vice versa. It's an intriguing premise that Alex Tucker explores throughout these pages with a tinge of disquieting nostalgia. A brilliant metaphor for buried trauma and the unhealthy habit of suppressing negative emotions. The fear of opening up. Afraid to feel.
This book horrified me and yet also gave me hope--that we can break down these walls and open up and fight our inner demons by allowing others in.
A beautiful, stunning piece of psychological fiction.
August 22, 2025
Absolutely thrilling. This book explores your dreams, or maybe nightmares and how they affect our reality. If you have ever had nightmares so real you jolt awake ready to fight whatever banshee was in front of you in your sleep, you will love this book. Alex absolutely nails what it's like to have modern day anxiety and to have to stuff down your feelings in an allegory for how pent up anger and sorrow manifest in real life. This novella will have you glued to the end, an absolute page burner. It will have you questioning what is real and what is a dream.
December 15, 2025
A quick novella that went from sad to weird quick (complimentary)
The novel centralizes around Cory and his family. He is demeaned and unfulfilled at work. He lets every insult and degradation slide off him because, as the title suggests, he's afraid to feel. As the story progresses we learn why he's so apprehensive to show his emotions and the disturbing reasons and lengths he takes to dampen them.
This book was a lot of fun. It was surprisingly emotional to watch Cory's story evolve and a wild ride to watch as everything unraveled from there.
The novel centralizes around Cory and his family. He is demeaned and unfulfilled at work. He lets every insult and degradation slide off him because, as the title suggests, he's afraid to feel. As the story progresses we learn why he's so apprehensive to show his emotions and the disturbing reasons and lengths he takes to dampen them.
This book was a lot of fun. It was surprisingly emotional to watch Cory's story evolve and a wild ride to watch as everything unraveled from there.
Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews