Adulting for Amateurs: Misadventures of a Geriatric Millennial

by Jess H. Gutierrez

From the author of A Product of Genetics (and Day Drinking) comes a rowdy and hilarious new collection of essays on life as an elder millennial, filled with life lessons on everything from marriage to parenting to rolling with the punches when Gen Z mocks your TikTok dances

In Adulting for Amateurs, Jess H. Gutierrez marvels at how—we can’t avoid the fact anymore—her cohort, the millennials, are approaching middle age. While 1998 seems like just yesterday, we are now grown-ups who feel like we’re still growing up. And at forty-two, Jess has quite a trove of stories to tell.

Jess is leaning into her geriatric millennial years and reflects on how growing up does not necessarily bestow one with maturity. When the dinner covers were lifted to reveal vertically posed sausages, hundreds of the fanciest wedding guests, including the mayor, were treated to a demure and refined Jess’s explosive guffaws. While Jess’s brothers now have wholesome families and responsible jobs, she can’t stop one-upping them, even if it gets her brother nearly fired by a potty-brained prank right before he scrubs into surgery. When Jess and her wife booked their first grown-up vacation, they discovered too late that their Hawaiian trip was to a Mormon resort and therefore completely alcohol free. So Jess and her wife bravely put on their big-girl panties—and slunk off in a makeshift escape from this cheerful teetotaler paradise.

Turns out, even as a responsible homeowner with a mortgage, three kids, and a yard of chickens, Jess might not have matured much beyond her twenties. She’s still the woman who in an earlier era survived queer-dating fails and aughts-era pop culture moments—ultimately discovering that an illegal rave cannot heal a broken heart and that vampire-romance franchises are terrible dating manuals for a budding trailer park lesbian.

Altogether these are the makings of delightful material for this bawdy—sometimes poignant and, dare we say, occasionally wise—new listen.

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, Essays

304 pages, Hardcover

Expected publication April 21, 2026

Reviews

[Sophia Kenward · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thank you NetGalley & the publishers for this ARC!

I enjoyed this book a lot! I may not be a millennial (and oh boy, this is a very millennial title for a book!), but I feel like a lot of this book is universal. I will never not laugh at stories of lesbians dating men before realizing they're gay as I have plenty of my own, and there are some pretty great ones here.

I wasn't expecting this book to make me laugh as much as it did, although not every chapter was a hit for me (the first chapter after the introduction in particular was a big miss and made me unnecessarily worried for the rest of the book). The chapter on the Hawaii vacation made me laugh out loud.

[Cari · Rating 5 out of 5]

Gutierrez returns with another laugh-out-loud memoir. I was laughing so hard while reading this that I almost woke up my family in our hotel room over the Labor Day holiday. I am not sure if it would appeal to members of other generations, but I am a geriatric millennial and related closely to Gutierrez's experiences. Pretty much if a book makes me snort with laughter, it's going to get five stars. I love Gutierrez's voice and candid recollections of the times in her life that embarrassed and challenged her (as well as triumphs!)

[Richard Propes · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's safe to say I was expecting the humor to be found within the pages of Jess H. Gutierez's "Adulting for Amateurs: Misadventures of a Geriatric Millennial," her latest collection of essays on life with her central theme this time encompassing her existence as a now elder millennial.

At 42 and approaching middle age, Gutierrez leans into this stage of her life with more than a little humor and a surprising amount of sentimentality. That's where I was most surprised by "Adulting for Amateurs" - its irreverent yet unabashed heart. Gutierrez has kinda sorta grown up, a responsible homeowner with a mortgage, three kids, chickens, and a lengthy relationship with a wife we can't help but adore by the end of "Adulting for Amateurs" whether Gutierrez is talking about vertically posed sausages, an absolutely inspired "first grown-up vacation," or any number of other topics approached by Gutierrez throughout this consistently engaging read.

If you're timid, you may want to brace yourself for occasionally naughty and bawdy set of essays and Gutierrez's unique perspectives on life, love, relationships, parenting, and existing in the world as a queer geriatric millennial.

"Adulting for Amateurs" is the kind of book that makes you want to take a trip back and visit Gutierrez's last essay collection, "A Product of Genetics (and Day Drinking)," and that's what I'm getting ready to do right now!

[yarnandprose · Rating 3 out of 5]

The author and I have a lot in common: three kids, married, within a five year age difference, and we both have Southern backgrounds.

There are a lot of very relatable feelings in this book. Each chapter is an anecdote related to feeling like an “elder millennial.” It is a strange space to be in. We don’t feel young, but we also don’t feel old. We like to dress in cool clothes, but hate crop tops.

The stories from her mid-twenties are very colorful and wild and there were parts I found funny. The only thing I kept having trouble with was the tone and language in the book. Her tone is very direct and boisterous. The stories are peppered with foul language and crass imagery. I can absolutely see someone else reading these stories as laugh out loud hilarious, but this type of writing style is not personally for me.

She does shine a truth on the fact we still don’t feel like we know what we are doing despite being declared adults with responsibilities. Every word in the book comes across as genuine and I raise my glass to her for pulling it all together.

*** Many thanks to Netgalley and publishers for providing a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. ***

[Jaclyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I didn’t know how I’d feel about this one going in. I don’t know how I feel about the word “adulting.” Ironically, I associate use of this term more with younger Millennials.

However, I had a lot of fun reading this essay collection. Gutierrez is self-aware, vulnerable, and laugh-out-loud funny in a string of misadventure tales that live up to the name. The long list of shout-outs to various Gen X and Elder Millennial pop culture touchstones in the beginning felt a little tedious, but once we got rolling I did not want to get off the ride.

That is probably my biggest hangup with this book. I love Elder Millennial (or Oregon Trail Millennial, as I prefer) and Gen X cultural references as much as the next guy, but Gutierrez occasionally leans too hard on them. It can feel a little reach-y, like she's demonstrating her generational cred. This is unnecessary. She has plenty of subtle opportunities to weave in-jokey references in, and her voice is plenty strong enough without falling back on devices.

All in all, though, I was thankful for the opportunity to read an ARC of this book via NetGalley. It was a super fun read from a unique perspective.

[Janelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a fun & nostalgic read. I hadn't read Gutierrez's previous work before picking this up but was immediately hooked by the cover and title. I'm a mid-90s on-the-cusp Millennial (I refuse to call myself a Zillennial) but still resonated with MANY of the experiences she shared. I keep wondering if I'll ever feel like I've reached that point of being a "Real Adult ™" and I found her perspective on the impostor syndrome of becoming and "feeling like an adult" so reassuring. Several of her essays had me laughing out loud and I'll absolutely be keeping an eye out for whatever she publishes next.

Thank you to Dutton, Tiny Reparations Books & Netgalley for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.

[Justin Bitner · Rating 3 out of 5]

Many thanks to NetGalley for the eARC of this book.

I was intrigued with this book based off the cover and title, but I have to admit that it ended up being middle-of-the-road for me.

Gutierrez shares essays recounting her upbringing and her stories with friends, work, romantic partners, etc. References to millennial and millennial-adjacent things are sprinkled in, but nothing really ever delivered that sharp laugh.

Overall, a light, quick read but not one I would necessarily revisit or recommend.

[Adri Holt · Rating 4 out of 5]

Getting older is absolute bullshit.” –FACTS.

Everyone has their own journey. Everyone has experienced something that they’re not proud of. This author lays it all out on the line for all to see, from childhood to her current life, she tells it like it is. She is hilarious, self-deprecating, and wonderfully relatable.

If you need some millennial nostalgia and a lot of laughs. This one is for you.

#ThxNetGalley #JessHGutierrez #AdultingforAmateurs