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Better Than Normal: Virtues for an Off-Script Life
Not yet published
Expected 14 Apr 26Normal is a myth—and recognizing that truth can free us all.
In a world obsessed with fitting in, Better Than Normal dares to ask a revolutionary What if the problem isn't people who don't conform, but the idea of "normal" itself?
Author and pastor MaryAnn McKibben Dana delivers a powerful critique of society's restrictive expectations while offering a transformative vision for human flourishing. Drawing from her experience as a mother navigating mental health challenges with her children, she reveals how forcing people into ill-fitting boxes creates cycles of shame, stigma, and othering that diminish us all.
This isn't just another self-help book—it's an exploration of how culture shapes our understanding of worthiness and belonging. And it's a study that extends far beyond mental health to encompass anyone living outside society's narrow bounds—neurodivergent individuals, LGBTQ+ people, racial minorities, those with disabilities—populations that collectively represent the majority of us. McKibben Dana demonstrates that liberation comes not from adjusting to dominant culture, but from creating spaces where all people can thrive authentically.
The book explores six transformational shifts that move people and communities from scarcity to
embracing curiosity over certainty,
courage over comfort,
presence over productivity,
authenticity over artifice,
beauty over blandness,
and community over competition.
McKibben Dana's vision extends far beyond individual transformation to encompass congregational renewal and cultural change. And her pastoral wisdom, honed through years of preaching and parenting, reveals how letting go of rigid normalcy doesn't just liberate those who struggle; it empowers everyone to live more creatively, empathetically, and abundantly.
Better Than Normal serves as both mirror and map, reflecting the ways current systems fall short while charting a course toward genuine flourishing. For those ready to put down the script of normalcy and move into the radical possibilities of human dignity, this book is a catalyst for the collective work of transformation. Normal is a myth—and recognizing that truth might just free us all.
In a world obsessed with fitting in, Better Than Normal dares to ask a revolutionary What if the problem isn't people who don't conform, but the idea of "normal" itself?
Author and pastor MaryAnn McKibben Dana delivers a powerful critique of society's restrictive expectations while offering a transformative vision for human flourishing. Drawing from her experience as a mother navigating mental health challenges with her children, she reveals how forcing people into ill-fitting boxes creates cycles of shame, stigma, and othering that diminish us all.
This isn't just another self-help book—it's an exploration of how culture shapes our understanding of worthiness and belonging. And it's a study that extends far beyond mental health to encompass anyone living outside society's narrow bounds—neurodivergent individuals, LGBTQ+ people, racial minorities, those with disabilities—populations that collectively represent the majority of us. McKibben Dana demonstrates that liberation comes not from adjusting to dominant culture, but from creating spaces where all people can thrive authentically.
The book explores six transformational shifts that move people and communities from scarcity to
embracing curiosity over certainty,
courage over comfort,
presence over productivity,
authenticity over artifice,
beauty over blandness,
and community over competition.
McKibben Dana's vision extends far beyond individual transformation to encompass congregational renewal and cultural change. And her pastoral wisdom, honed through years of preaching and parenting, reveals how letting go of rigid normalcy doesn't just liberate those who struggle; it empowers everyone to live more creatively, empathetically, and abundantly.
Better Than Normal serves as both mirror and map, reflecting the ways current systems fall short while charting a course toward genuine flourishing. For those ready to put down the script of normalcy and move into the radical possibilities of human dignity, this book is a catalyst for the collective work of transformation. Normal is a myth—and recognizing that truth might just free us all.
Kindle Edition
Expected publication April 14, 2026
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Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews
Review of advance copy received from Author
Better Than Normal is one of those rare books that feels like a conversation instead of a lecture.
MaryAnn McKibben Dana writes openly about her experiences, lived, not just studied. She insists that people who live with mental illness are not broken goods. The book quietly dismantles the lie that “normal” is the goal. Instead, it argues that the parts of us we’ve been taught to hide—our sadness, our queerness, our questions about God, our anger at injustice—might actually be where our truest strength lives.
Dana reminds us that worth isn’t earned by fitting in and makes a case that healing doesn’t happen in isolation but rather It happens when people resist the pressure to perform and instead practice being honest with themselves and others. That honesty becomes an act of resistance—against perfectionism, against systems that rank human value, against the idea that suffering disqualifies you from meaning.
The author emphasises self worth … the slow, stubborn belief that your life matters even when you’re tired, even when you’re different, even when you don’t know what you believe. The book doesn’t promise happiness. It promises dignity. And in a world that constantly measures people by productivity, purity, or palatability, that’s radical.
Better Than Normal doesn’t fix you. It reminds you that you were never the problem. It’s a book for anyone who has felt too sad, too queer, too spiritual, too angry, or too much—and wondered if there was room for them anyway. According to this book, there is. And that room might be exactly where change starts.
MaryAnn McKibben Dana writes openly about her experiences, lived, not just studied. She insists that people who live with mental illness are not broken goods. The book quietly dismantles the lie that “normal” is the goal. Instead, it argues that the parts of us we’ve been taught to hide—our sadness, our queerness, our questions about God, our anger at injustice—might actually be where our truest strength lives.
Dana reminds us that worth isn’t earned by fitting in and makes a case that healing doesn’t happen in isolation but rather It happens when people resist the pressure to perform and instead practice being honest with themselves and others. That honesty becomes an act of resistance—against perfectionism, against systems that rank human value, against the idea that suffering disqualifies you from meaning.
The author emphasises self worth … the slow, stubborn belief that your life matters even when you’re tired, even when you’re different, even when you don’t know what you believe. The book doesn’t promise happiness. It promises dignity. And in a world that constantly measures people by productivity, purity, or palatability, that’s radical.
Better Than Normal doesn’t fix you. It reminds you that you were never the problem. It’s a book for anyone who has felt too sad, too queer, too spiritual, too angry, or too much—and wondered if there was room for them anyway. According to this book, there is. And that room might be exactly where change starts.
February 5, 2026
I received a n advance reading copy of this book. I have read all of MaryAnn McKibben Dana’s books and really appreciate her honest, straightforward voice that challenges me and other readers to live with intentionality and authenticity. This book, in particular, came out of a time of struggles she and her family had around mental health with her teenage children. It caused her to wonder more about the values our American society encourages that attempt to define quite narrowly what is a normal way of living.
She discusses three individual values and three communal values and offers an alternative value to each, values that are more open, more communal, and more relational. The values she holds up provide for more diversity, many paths to success, and a more authentic way of life that celebrates that each of us was created as a unique child of God with gifts to offer the world. When our communities recognize and celebrate these unique gifts, we are able to work together rather than against each other to live in communities that are healthier and more supportive to all.
While she writes from a white, Christian perspective, her use of narrative story and literary and cultural examples make this an accessible book for those who are not connected to a faith community as well. For small groups who would like to read and discuss this book, questions for reflection for each chapter are included at the back of the book.
She discusses three individual values and three communal values and offers an alternative value to each, values that are more open, more communal, and more relational. The values she holds up provide for more diversity, many paths to success, and a more authentic way of life that celebrates that each of us was created as a unique child of God with gifts to offer the world. When our communities recognize and celebrate these unique gifts, we are able to work together rather than against each other to live in communities that are healthier and more supportive to all.
While she writes from a white, Christian perspective, her use of narrative story and literary and cultural examples make this an accessible book for those who are not connected to a faith community as well. For small groups who would like to read and discuss this book, questions for reflection for each chapter are included at the back of the book.
January 29, 2026
I really enjoyed this book!
As some with anxiety who is parenting someone that seems to have anxiety this book had so many useful suggestions and tools.
I will definitely be buying a copy once released!
As some with anxiety who is parenting someone that seems to have anxiety this book had so many useful suggestions and tools.
I will definitely be buying a copy once released!
Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews