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True #2
True Beginnings
A DARK EROTIC ROMANCE
Max has been in control since the beginning. There's never been a question in Lucy's mind about that. Take Max, take his control. But Max still questions himself...will he be able to control his anger...
Max has been in control since the beginning. There's never been a question in Lucy's mind about that. Take Max, take his control. But Max still questions himself...will he be able to control his anger...
146 pages, Kindle Edition
First published December 3, 2014
About the author
Willow Madison
10 books270 followersFor new release info, sign up for her (never spammy) newsletters:
http://willowmadisonbooks.com
Willow Madison enjoys writing in a variety of genres including dark psychological suspense, contemporary romance, and dark romance. All her books have one thing in common: an unflinching, unapologetic, uncompromising exploration into what dark corners our desires can take us.
Find yourself in Willow Madison Books
More About Willow . . .
Willow came into this world hand first, clutching a No 2 pencil between her chubby baby fingers. Coming up with ways to twist the lives of her Barbies and Kens was a favorite pastime from her towheaded youth.
In the wilds of the Windy City, her imagination really took off, resulting in all sorts of dramas, big and small.
Speaking of size, she prefers her male characters to be larger than life, unapologetically Alphaholish, and as close to so wrong he’s right as she can write.
Willow embodies a wanderlust, having explored five continents and called seven states home so far, with a hope to never lose her tumbling tumbleweed status unless it’s for the chance to live out her ultimate fantasy.
She’s had many loves, some four-legged and viciously fanged, others high in calories and covered in chocolate. Tacos are hard for her to resist, and she’s a firm believer that chili sauce makes most anything better.
A perfect day ends with stretching and a new book.
Some of this is fictitious. But you can’t fault her—Willow is a writer.
Connect with Willow . . .
https://www.facebook.com/willowmadiso...
http://willowmadisonbooks.com
Willow Madison enjoys writing in a variety of genres including dark psychological suspense, contemporary romance, and dark romance. All her books have one thing in common: an unflinching, unapologetic, uncompromising exploration into what dark corners our desires can take us.
Find yourself in Willow Madison Books
More About Willow . . .
Willow came into this world hand first, clutching a No 2 pencil between her chubby baby fingers. Coming up with ways to twist the lives of her Barbies and Kens was a favorite pastime from her towheaded youth.
In the wilds of the Windy City, her imagination really took off, resulting in all sorts of dramas, big and small.
Speaking of size, she prefers her male characters to be larger than life, unapologetically Alphaholish, and as close to so wrong he’s right as she can write.
Willow embodies a wanderlust, having explored five continents and called seven states home so far, with a hope to never lose her tumbling tumbleweed status unless it’s for the chance to live out her ultimate fantasy.
She’s had many loves, some four-legged and viciously fanged, others high in calories and covered in chocolate. Tacos are hard for her to resist, and she’s a firm believer that chili sauce makes most anything better.
A perfect day ends with stretching and a new book.
Some of this is fictitious. But you can’t fault her—Willow is a writer.
Connect with Willow . . .
https://www.facebook.com/willowmadiso...
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Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 37 reviews
August 16, 2019
Dark, disturbing and yet totally addictive.
This is a difficult read, it really is, in the past I've read 'Fifty Shades' and a whole host of books of a similar vein but I have never read anything quite like this and I actually wonder sometimes why I'm still reading it, it's kind of like watching a horror film through your fingers you don't want to watch but you can't fully look away.
It's hard to get across just how harrowing and disturbing this book is at times and it's most likely because we're witnesses to the change as it slowly happens, Lucy is literally changing before our eyes and it's not an easy thing to experience as she's slowly moulded into the perfect little Stepford wife for Max.
The other books I've read have involved pain and bondage, you know the type I mean but this is on a whole different level this is a total takeover of her life and she's willingly going ahead with it and I just can't get my head around why and maybe that's partly why I'm struggling so much. We watch her change before our eyes, every time we meet her she seems to have lost a little more of herself while she strives to become Max's perfect little girl.
But I can't help myself I'm totally addicted and I've already downloaded 'True Choice' and 'True Control 4.1' and 'True Control 4.2' so there's no end in sight for my self inflicted torture.
This is a difficult read, it really is, in the past I've read 'Fifty Shades' and a whole host of books of a similar vein but I have never read anything quite like this and I actually wonder sometimes why I'm still reading it, it's kind of like watching a horror film through your fingers you don't want to watch but you can't fully look away.
It's hard to get across just how harrowing and disturbing this book is at times and it's most likely because we're witnesses to the change as it slowly happens, Lucy is literally changing before our eyes and it's not an easy thing to experience as she's slowly moulded into the perfect little Stepford wife for Max.
The other books I've read have involved pain and bondage, you know the type I mean but this is on a whole different level this is a total takeover of her life and she's willingly going ahead with it and I just can't get my head around why and maybe that's partly why I'm struggling so much. We watch her change before our eyes, every time we meet her she seems to have lost a little more of herself while she strives to become Max's perfect little girl.
But I can't help myself I'm totally addicted and I've already downloaded 'True Choice' and 'True Control 4.1' and 'True Control 4.2' so there's no end in sight for my self inflicted torture.
December 25, 2015
Why The Effing Hell Are You Reading Book Two?
I had a ton of misgivings and my thoughts felt like firecrackers thrown in a pressure cooker in book one.
I ultimately couldn't even decide on a star rating for the book because I was so torn between having mad respect for the way the author forced me to confront my own thoughts as a sexual being, a human being, & a woman vs really wanting to punch Max in the nuts & stow Lucy away in a nice strip club with a guy named Ike the Pike.
I'm not gonna lie, when book one was over I wanted to curl up in a corner with a big dose of NA cheese puff & a bag of Cheetos just to get over the PTSD the end caused me. Wuss? I'll own it.
So, wtf am I reading book two, you ask?
As I conversed with fellow reviewers and the author, I knew I needed to finish this one out, not for the entertainment enjoyment of it but rather the mental challenge of it. The author challenges me, figuratively and LITERALLY (the winch) to dig deep and finish this series.
It's a hard, disturbing, and thought provoking read that not everyone will be able to physically and emotionally stomach. Be warned~
The Slap Wrap Up
I wondered how Max would handle his disciplinary actions r/t public perception. I was impressed by how he wanted Lucy to handle it.
To me, this is a vital element to the story. If he had chosen hiding, I would have lost any possibility of understanding his version of a dominant role. If you have to hide it, it's wrong and there would have really been no further thought I needed to put into it.
One, Two, Three, Let's DickPunch Max!
Like in book one, I want to jerk this f'r up and hurt him very badly . I find him to be intolerable, with one loving hand and one sadistic hand.
Ie... This bitch can't ever even close the bathroom door or take a piss without asking permission.
...Than ask permission to piss, but hey.. Whatever floats your panties, Lucy ...literally.
Danger, Will Robinson, D.A.N.G.E.R!!!
There is an angry tension in Max's character that's palpable off the pages. To the reader, his restraint and mental control seem like they are being held high in the air by a thread and Lucy is a kitten naively standing under it pawing at the last fibers as she's trustingly unaware that a simple snap would destroy her.
There is a turning point in Max's control. I feel like he has been dishonest with Lucy in his promising her he would never harm her past the point of recovery. Eventually, he internally admits that he wasn't confident in that promise when he made it and wasn't sure if the darkness would lead him to a place he would irreparably harm her.
^That^ is another pivotal moment for me because he put her in certain positions of grave harm when he recognized that he didn't know if he could maintain control. He lied. Of all his faults, he wasn't a liar up until that point. D/S relationships, by their very nature and no matter what tier of intensity they fall, ALL rely on one basic constant - a loop of trust, honesty, & respect.
Lucy
I might need to ask Max if I can write this section...?
;) Thanks, Max ;)
I had a lot of review questions on whether Lucy knew about, accepted, even understood his dominate behavior in book one. Book two brings a lot of depth to Lucy's character as a newly submissive woman.
These quotes give tremendous insight into where Lucy's mental state is:
Doubts about her consenting and being a willing participant in the D/S dynamic are clearly dispelled.
In book one, Lucy's mental and emotional focus r/t the dynamics of her D/S relationship with Max was from a place of bewilderment - she was amazed at how far submissive she allowed herself to go to please him.
In book two, the author delves deeper, beyond mere consent, to Lucy's own psyche in this relationship - desires, needs, pleasure, pain, etc being gained and met through pleasing him. In other words, does she like all this shit herself, for herself -or- for only him, to please only him. That's a question that I felt needed to be answered to believe the longevity of the relationship, and it was answered.
I don't know about delicious lol. It's difficult to process both sides of this: the torment and the pleasure. Lucy talks a good game about being happy with Max and loving him... BUT she's constantly a crying, sick, fearful, mess of a woman on the edge of a nervous breakdown.
The psyche conflict as she is simultaneously 1) wound tightly in angst, fear, and distress as she is terrified of doing any little thing to displease Max 2) being a guilty self-loathing emotional wreck when she does displease Max and also 3) finding some solace, pleasure, and comfort in the being relieved of all the above through his punishments.
It's a mind fuck!
At 77%, I'm disturbed by how desperate she is & how she has so tightly woven together his love, her forgiveness, his anger, her worthiness, and their entire relationship into this ball of harsh, cruel punishments.
I find her word choices and state of mind disturbing on so many levels:
Domestic Discipline vs Abuse
I continue to personally view a lot of the physical discipline as violent and abusive.
There is a lot, and I do mean a lot, of physical hitting, spanking, slapping, pinching, etc in this book. It's harsh. It's not in any way playful. It's sometimes violent. It's sometimes without reason or justification.
I'm actually starting to wonder if Max is a sadist?!?
*clears throat LOUDLY*
Maintenance? Max, you Mf'er, you need YOUR ass spanked with a 4x4!
I can understand regimented discipline, but not hurting someone just because you can. Again, it's the picture I have of what a sadist's mentality is like.
Readers should know that much of the pain he inflicts upon her as discipline is 'just because he can' mentality.
This also goes beyond physical strikes to what I would consider psychological torture. She's in a constant state of fear, for example. Another example is that he beats her, ties her up, and leaves her in a closet all night long. For my own personal definition and lines, this is what I classify as psychological abuse.
Fuck All The Slapping
I've discovered I have a real aversion to face slapping. It would be a hard limit for me, like do it and I'll cut your penis off kinda limit.
Max's rules and "little girl" do this or that irritates the shit out of me, but it doesn't disturb me. The slaps to the face in book one disturbed me. And, the slaps to her face in book two equally disturbed me, even though they were done during sex and not as hard. To hell with this slapping shit!
As I noted with the discipline often just being 'because I can,' the hurt he inflicts during sexual acts isn't always from a mentality of his/her pleasure, but rather with a mentality of 'just because I can.' Again, disturbing TO ME.
Again, Sadistic?
Is There Anything I Do Like About Max?
White gold,please.
Max has a protective moment.
.......-----.....----.... Yeah, that's about it.
Note To Author
Out of both books, there was only one scene that didn't feel was natural; if felt forced, contrived. Character hole?
• Lucy understands and expects Max's various rules from open doors, saying yes sir, and basically not making a move without his approval. Yet, she acts flabbergasted during a convo about his expectations for her future employment status. I expected it. Lucy should've expected it. So, her deer between headlights reaction didn't ring true and made her look like a twit. Just something to think about if you do any revisions in the future.
btw: How wrong is it that I want Lucy to ride off into the sunset with the brother?!?!? Bahaha.
Bottom Line
The author warns you there ain't no damn candy, and she didn't lie.
This is not a book for the readers that demand to have a sugar coated BDSM relationship, like FSOG. This book exposes all the raw nerves and just keeps pinching the hell out of them.
The same triggers from book one are only amplified here.
Thought provoking. In a book world with too much fluff, this is actually a very thought provoking book. Painful to read, but no less thought provoking.
My takeaway from this book is this:
Personally....
I still don't agree with the level of domination and submission here. I still don't agree with what I consider Abuse, not Punishment. And, now I don't believe in the mentality it's done from, either.
Yet....
I do believe that love & relationship dynamics do not come in a one-size-fits all picture frame for society to approve or disapprove of before two people can be frame themselves as a couple in love.
So...
Who is to judge how two consenting adults express themselves within their relationship?
Define what is love?
Define abuse for yourself?
What's the difference between arriving at pleasure from mild pain (ie a candy coated spanking) vs arriving at pleasure from a greater pain (ie a slap to the face?)
Where is the line between dominating another's mind, body, and spirit and consuming their very identity and soul to the point they don't exist?
****Again, I'll let the review speak for itself and decline a star rating.
I had a ton of misgivings and my thoughts felt like firecrackers thrown in a pressure cooker in book one.
I ultimately couldn't even decide on a star rating for the book because I was so torn between having mad respect for the way the author forced me to confront my own thoughts as a sexual being, a human being, & a woman vs really wanting to punch Max in the nuts & stow Lucy away in a nice strip club with a guy named Ike the Pike.
I'm not gonna lie, when book one was over I wanted to curl up in a corner with a big dose of NA cheese puff & a bag of Cheetos just to get over the PTSD the end caused me. Wuss? I'll own it.
So, wtf am I reading book two, you ask?
As I conversed with fellow reviewers and the author, I knew I needed to finish this one out, not for the entertainment enjoyment of it but rather the mental challenge of it. The author challenges me, figuratively and LITERALLY (the winch) to dig deep and finish this series.
It's a hard, disturbing, and thought provoking read that not everyone will be able to physically and emotionally stomach. Be warned~
The Slap Wrap Up
I wondered how Max would handle his disciplinary actions r/t public perception. I was impressed by how he wanted Lucy to handle it.
To me, this is a vital element to the story. If he had chosen hiding, I would have lost any possibility of understanding his version of a dominant role. If you have to hide it, it's wrong and there would have really been no further thought I needed to put into it.
One, Two, Three, Let's DickPunch Max!
Like in book one, I want to jerk this f'r up and hurt him very badly . I find him to be intolerable, with one loving hand and one sadistic hand.
"She doesn't have the right to privacy anymore."
Ie... This bitch can't ever even close the bathroom door or take a piss without asking permission.
...Than ask permission to piss, but hey.. Whatever floats your panties, Lucy ...literally.
Danger, Will Robinson, D.A.N.G.E.R!!!
There is an angry tension in Max's character that's palpable off the pages. To the reader, his restraint and mental control seem like they are being held high in the air by a thread and Lucy is a kitten naively standing under it pawing at the last fibers as she's trustingly unaware that a simple snap would destroy her.
There is a turning point in Max's control. I feel like he has been dishonest with Lucy in his promising her he would never harm her past the point of recovery. Eventually, he internally admits that he wasn't confident in that promise when he made it and wasn't sure if the darkness would lead him to a place he would irreparably harm her.
^That^ is another pivotal moment for me because he put her in certain positions of grave harm when he recognized that he didn't know if he could maintain control. He lied. Of all his faults, he wasn't a liar up until that point. D/S relationships, by their very nature and no matter what tier of intensity they fall, ALL rely on one basic constant - a loop of trust, honesty, & respect.
Lucy
I might need to ask Max if I can write this section...?
;) Thanks, Max ;)
I had a lot of review questions on whether Lucy knew about, accepted, even understood his dominate behavior in book one. Book two brings a lot of depth to Lucy's character as a newly submissive woman.
These quotes give tremendous insight into where Lucy's mental state is:
"And I have surprised myself with how much I like it this way. He's in control. There's never been a question about this in my mind. Take Max, take his control."
"He made me a promise. And I know that I can trust him. I know that I can give into these feelings...that I'm safe... to be turned on by his anger, his control."
"I crave your love, Max. I need your love. The pain...is part of your love and I crave it."
"Max....please...I'll do anything to deserve your forgiveness." "Do...do what you have to do...punish me...please!"
Doubts about her consenting and being a willing participant in the D/S dynamic are clearly dispelled.
In book one, Lucy's mental and emotional focus r/t the dynamics of her D/S relationship with Max was from a place of bewilderment - she was amazed at how far submissive she allowed herself to go to please him.
In book two, the author delves deeper, beyond mere consent, to Lucy's own psyche in this relationship - desires, needs, pleasure, pain, etc being gained and met through pleasing him. In other words, does she like all this shit herself, for herself -or- for only him, to please only him. That's a question that I felt needed to be answered to believe the longevity of the relationship, and it was answered.
I don't know about delicious lol. It's difficult to process both sides of this: the torment and the pleasure. Lucy talks a good game about being happy with Max and loving him... BUT she's constantly a crying, sick, fearful, mess of a woman on the edge of a nervous breakdown.
The psyche conflict as she is simultaneously 1) wound tightly in angst, fear, and distress as she is terrified of doing any little thing to displease Max 2) being a guilty self-loathing emotional wreck when she does displease Max and also 3) finding some solace, pleasure, and comfort in the being relieved of all the above through his punishments.
It's a mind fuck!
At 77%, I'm disturbed by how desperate she is & how she has so tightly woven together his love, her forgiveness, his anger, her worthiness, and their entire relationship into this ball of harsh, cruel punishments.
I find her word choices and state of mind disturbing on so many levels:
"I can't move and he's going to beat me like this. I lower my head only slightly in an agony of shame. He doesn't even trust me not to move"
Domestic Discipline vs Abuse
I continue to personally view a lot of the physical discipline as violent and abusive.
There is a lot, and I do mean a lot, of physical hitting, spanking, slapping, pinching, etc in this book. It's harsh. It's not in any way playful. It's sometimes violent. It's sometimes without reason or justification.
I'm actually starting to wonder if Max is a sadist?!?
"I like hurting you, Lucy"
"Her tears always make me harder."
*clears throat LOUDLY*
"This is a maintenance spanking, Lucy."
"Even if you've been on your best behavior all week long, as you should be anyway...you will receive a spanking."
Maintenance? Max, you Mf'er, you need YOUR ass spanked with a 4x4!
I can understand regimented discipline, but not hurting someone just because you can. Again, it's the picture I have of what a sadist's mentality is like.
Readers should know that much of the pain he inflicts upon her as discipline is 'just because he can' mentality.
This also goes beyond physical strikes to what I would consider psychological torture. She's in a constant state of fear, for example. Another example is that he beats her, ties her up, and leaves her in a closet all night long. For my own personal definition and lines, this is what I classify as psychological abuse.
Fuck All The Slapping
I've discovered I have a real aversion to face slapping. It would be a hard limit for me, like do it and I'll cut your penis off kinda limit.
Max's rules and "little girl" do this or that irritates the shit out of me, but it doesn't disturb me. The slaps to the face in book one disturbed me. And, the slaps to her face in book two equally disturbed me, even though they were done during sex and not as hard. To hell with this slapping shit!
As I noted with the discipline often just being 'because I can,' the hurt he inflicts during sexual acts isn't always from a mentality of his/her pleasure, but rather with a mentality of 'just because I can.' Again, disturbing TO ME.
"You belong to me, Lucy. And, I'll do whatever I like to you. Whenever I feel like it. Do you understand me?" ... "And I like slapping you. I like the look on your face."
Again, Sadistic?
Is There Anything I Do Like About Max?
White gold,please.
Max has a protective moment.
.......-----.....----.... Yeah, that's about it.
Note To Author
Out of both books, there was only one scene that didn't feel was natural; if felt forced, contrived. Character hole?
• Lucy understands and expects Max's various rules from open doors, saying yes sir, and basically not making a move without his approval. Yet, she acts flabbergasted during a convo about his expectations for her future employment status. I expected it. Lucy should've expected it. So, her deer between headlights reaction didn't ring true and made her look like a twit. Just something to think about if you do any revisions in the future.
btw: How wrong is it that I want Lucy to ride off into the sunset with the brother?!?!? Bahaha.
Bottom Line
The author warns you there ain't no damn candy, and she didn't lie.
This is not a book for the readers that demand to have a sugar coated BDSM relationship, like FSOG. This book exposes all the raw nerves and just keeps pinching the hell out of them.
The same triggers from book one are only amplified here.
Thought provoking. In a book world with too much fluff, this is actually a very thought provoking book. Painful to read, but no less thought provoking.
My takeaway from this book is this:
Personally....
I still don't agree with the level of domination and submission here. I still don't agree with what I consider Abuse, not Punishment. And, now I don't believe in the mentality it's done from, either.
Yet....
I do believe that love & relationship dynamics do not come in a one-size-fits all picture frame for society to approve or disapprove of before two people can be frame themselves as a couple in love.
So...
Who is to judge how two consenting adults express themselves within their relationship?
Define what is love?
Define abuse for yourself?
What's the difference between arriving at pleasure from mild pain (ie a candy coated spanking) vs arriving at pleasure from a greater pain (ie a slap to the face?)
Where is the line between dominating another's mind, body, and spirit and consuming their very identity and soul to the point they don't exist?
****Again, I'll let the review speak for itself and decline a star rating.
March 15, 2020
Like in Book 1 I've no misgivings or conceptions of Max and Lucy's relationship. Here we have much developed view of Lucy's reaction and behaviour to Max's "training" to mold her into a perfect little submissive. I don't know why I'm still surprised by the things she goes through. Their relationship has pleasure, pain and abuse. Lucy is terrified to displease Max, she is constantly on edge of despair. Then she brings out self-loathing and feels guilty by blaming herself, convinced she deserves the punishment. Max is so comfortable by the things he does. He is completely okay if people sees the bruises he inflicted on Lucy,
"Aren't you afraid of someone asking me about my face?"
"No."
"Why not?!"
"Because if anyone asks you, you'll have to say what happened. Won't you?"
"And what happened...is you misbehaved. Didn't you?”
"And I had to punish you. Didn't I?"
I don't know why I'm still baffled.
Jake is Max's younger brother by three years who is freshly out of relationship. He seems so nice and sweet at the beginning but as we proceed with his interactions in the book we find he has a dark side. Looking forward to read more about him.
I'm addicted to this dark disturbing story. In the end there is a turning point in Max and Lucy's life. I'm quite obsessed with them.
"Aren't you afraid of someone asking me about my face?"
"No."
"Why not?!"
"Because if anyone asks you, you'll have to say what happened. Won't you?"
"And what happened...is you misbehaved. Didn't you?”
"And I had to punish you. Didn't I?"
I don't know why I'm still baffled.
Jake is Max's younger brother by three years who is freshly out of relationship. He seems so nice and sweet at the beginning but as we proceed with his interactions in the book we find he has a dark side. Looking forward to read more about him.
I'm addicted to this dark disturbing story. In the end there is a turning point in Max and Lucy's life. I'm quite obsessed with them.
August 11, 2016
Lord this book had me tied in all sorts of knots. And not the fun Shibari style knots. Like sick from anxiety kind of knots.
So, Max is just as domineering and controlling in this episode as he was in #1. Actually more so, as he’s getting Lucy more and more accustomed to hisrequests demands. Max has been very honest about what he expects from Lucy, and how he expects her to behave. So it’s no one else’s fault but Lucy’s when he finds out she’s been making plans without asking him, then asking him after the fact. The fact that she is still pushing his boundaries at this point is only going to be taken out of her behind. I, in no way, feel bad for the punishment that Lucy suffers at Max’s hands when she knowingly goes against one of his rules. Lord, the whole scene at her work party? Had me on pins and needles to see what would happen. And let me be honest here, if Lucy were my girlfriend, and she was acting that way at a party (work or not), I would indeed punish her for being so disrespectful to me. Again, she’s breaking rules that she fully knows the consequences to. My husband would be PISSED if I was splashing around in a pool with my male work buddies. Without a swim suit on and in a white dress. He would also freak the eff out if I was letting all manner of dudes put their hands on me. Whether it’s an “innocent” gesture or not. The fact of the matter is that most of the time it is never innocent when a single guy gently touches your arm or whatever. That’s flirting. Because really, you would never touch your co-workers like that if it is just a professional friendship. I also thought that blah-blah (the guy who touches her arm and has a thing for her, I can’t remember his name sorry), was disrespectful for knowing that she had a boyfriend/fiancé and continued to flirt with her and touch her. That is not a stand-up guy peeps. Brad, maybe? Sorry, still trying to remember his name. In addition to that I think Tracy is the worst kind of friend. She’s not supportive, she expects everyone to do what she wants without any discussion. I understand that Lucy somewhat has this relationship with Max, but is was agreed to beforehand. Not just assumed that super-special snowflake gets whatever they want. Tracy doesn’t listen to her friends, doesn’t take their feelings into consideration, and is constantly talking down to them in a most condescending manner. I can’t stand her.
I’m honestly a little jealous of, and pissed at, Lucy. I love that Max is so traditional and rule-based. He may be more so than I could personally handle in real life, but that kind of control and the ease with which he does it, is super sexy. Lucy doesn’t realize what she has and how she is jeopardizing it. If you still wanted to act like a single girl, then you should’ve stayed a single girl. You don’t get to be in this kind of committed relationship with someone but still pretend like you’re a single party girl always going to clubs, getting drunk, and letting random guys touch and come on to you.
When I finished reading this I was in no way upset with Max, but rather getting royally pissed at Lucy and how she lets Tracy treat her and how disrespectful she’s been to Max. Lucy, you stupid twat, you knew what kind of relationship you were going to get with Max. So why do you continue to be surprised by the things that happen? I’m going to say this again, this is not an abusive relationship. It is a very extreme Domestic Discipline relationship. Max doesn’t magically get angry for no reason. There is always a reason and it is usually either something that Lucy should’ve figured out on her own. i.e. common sense (don’t get in a pool with a bunch of guys while wearing a white sundress). Or it is something that has already been spelled out by Max. You know the rules, you know the consequences. Either man up and accept the relationship for what it is, which you obviously enjoy. Or effing leave. You don’t get it both ways.
So, I guess what I'm trying to say her is, this isn't nearly as "bad" as I thought it was going to be or how other people made it out to be. Mindfuck? yes. abuse? no. I like Max and his domineering ways. There are enough people out there that we can all find someone else to share in our personal brand of lifestyle and kink.
I received a copy of this book for free from the author, in exchange for my honest review.
So, Max is just as domineering and controlling in this episode as he was in #1. Actually more so, as he’s getting Lucy more and more accustomed to his
I’m honestly a little jealous of, and pissed at, Lucy. I love that Max is so traditional and rule-based. He may be more so than I could personally handle in real life, but that kind of control and the ease with which he does it, is super sexy. Lucy doesn’t realize what she has and how she is jeopardizing it. If you still wanted to act like a single girl, then you should’ve stayed a single girl. You don’t get to be in this kind of committed relationship with someone but still pretend like you’re a single party girl always going to clubs, getting drunk, and letting random guys touch and come on to you.
When I finished reading this I was in no way upset with Max, but rather getting royally pissed at Lucy and how she lets Tracy treat her and how disrespectful she’s been to Max. Lucy, you stupid twat, you knew what kind of relationship you were going to get with Max. So why do you continue to be surprised by the things that happen? I’m going to say this again, this is not an abusive relationship. It is a very extreme Domestic Discipline relationship. Max doesn’t magically get angry for no reason. There is always a reason and it is usually either something that Lucy should’ve figured out on her own. i.e. common sense (don’t get in a pool with a bunch of guys while wearing a white sundress). Or it is something that has already been spelled out by Max. You know the rules, you know the consequences. Either man up and accept the relationship for what it is, which you obviously enjoy. Or effing leave. You don’t get it both ways.
So, I guess what I'm trying to say her is, this isn't nearly as "bad" as I thought it was going to be or how other people made it out to be. Mindfuck? yes. abuse? no. I like Max and his domineering ways. There are enough people out there that we can all find someone else to share in our personal brand of lifestyle and kink.
I received a copy of this book for free from the author, in exchange for my honest review.
September 12, 2020
I mean this relationship is a train wreck. 😳😳😳
August 16, 2019
4.5 stars, rounding up to 5 because this book is my favorite of the series.
Ok, I'm not sure what to say. The way this twisted, dysfunctional "love" story messed with my emotions was addicting to me. This is a loaded series full of potential triggers and I see how it crossed lines for many readers.
Ok, I'm not sure what to say. The way this twisted, dysfunctional "love" story messed with my emotions was addicting to me. This is a loaded series full of potential triggers and I see how it crossed lines for many readers.
May 15, 2020
I finished book 1, bought book 2, started it immediately and then read it straight through.
So many things to say. So many. I still doubt that this relationship is totally safe. But then I don't doubt either that it is what Lucy wants, or at least thinks she wants. And I'm pretty sure anyone in a M/s relationship will find me a judgemental a-hole. Whilst Lucy and Max don't define their relationship in that way he DOES want to control her even down to her thoughts. He doesn't want her to have any free will other than the will to please and live for him. That scares me half to death and is what makes this both and uncomfortable AND a gripping read.
"I crave your love, Max. I need your love. The pain... is part of your love and I crave it."
I've never really 'felt' any romance in either book so far, but this to me is a psychological mind-f**k of a read anyway. One that has you questioning Lucy, Max, the author and your own sanity at times. I'm determined to finish this series over the weekend, as for the first time in a long time I am TOTALLY DESPERATE to know how a story ends.
He enjoys seeing bruises he has made on her - ok I could go with that, but these bruises are on HER FACE. Conversely this means he isn't ashamed of what he does and therefore in his mind at least it isn't abuse. It's part of his control over Lucy. Though at times I got the impression all he wants is a doll who dresses, acts, thinks, speaks and poses exactly to his design. He doesn't want Lucy. THAT is where my struggle is with Max. And yet I'm still fixated and enthralled by the story - kudos to the author for such great writing.
"...I want to get you to a point that your thoughts are automatically centered on me. And nothing else. And that your behaviour is second nature."
She'll make a good wife... with a few more lessons.
So there I am hating on Max when he says
"But I don't want you to be afraid of me truly hurting you. I will never do anything to you.. that can't heal without damage." I want to reassure her not frighten her this morning.
So just as I step back from the edge he then tells me
I expect her not to close any doors to me. She doesn't have the right to privacy anymore.
aaaannnnndddd I'm right back at wanting to suffocate him.
Lucy doesn't help matters either. She has me questioning her sanity on more than one occasion. I never could have imagined him slapping me, let alone me accepting it as punishment for breaking one of his rules. But he did... and I did. And now I'm forever changed somehow. I think and feel differently. It's all about Max, pleasing him, not disappointing him... not angering him..
It's those last three words that bother me. So often it's all about Max but then just when I'm back to hating him he does something thoughtful for Lucy. I turn to Max and give him a kiss on the cheek, "Thank you for thinking of this." I know it's really his doing. His attentiveness to me, his caring nature, is what I fell in love with first.
No, my old self didn't have someone who cares so much about me, loves me as much as I love him.
The number of times she flinches when he raises his hand - woah. She is on edge, she is jumpy, she is scared to upset or disappoint him. That is why this doesn't really sound a healthy relationship. I'm afraid to move or speak.
Seriously girl? I'm torn between wanting her to just get the heck out of there and respecting her right to choose that relationship. Particularly as there are times Max's control really does feel more like abuse. He frequently slaps, pinches and grabs at her. He seems to enjoy thrusting deep enough to hurt her during sex, he twists her wrist at one point, he controls what she is able to wear - even when this leaves her too hot or too cold. How is any of that showing care for her welfare and wellbeing? He gets angry that she "let guy's touch her" as though she can control the actions of others.
And yet again there are times when he DOES seem to value, care for and put her needs first.
I still like Jake better "I don't want you to get hurt, Lucy, because he thinks it's the only way to love." He adds, softly, "You deserve better than that...."
So many things to say. So many. I still doubt that this relationship is totally safe. But then I don't doubt either that it is what Lucy wants, or at least thinks she wants. And I'm pretty sure anyone in a M/s relationship will find me a judgemental a-hole. Whilst Lucy and Max don't define their relationship in that way he DOES want to control her even down to her thoughts. He doesn't want her to have any free will other than the will to please and live for him. That scares me half to death and is what makes this both and uncomfortable AND a gripping read.
"I crave your love, Max. I need your love. The pain... is part of your love and I crave it."
It's all my fault! If I hadn't been indecent, if I hadn't let those men touch me, if I hadn't gone out to lunch {this is a WORK event} without his permission...none of this would have happened. I berate myself in silence.
I've never really 'felt' any romance in either book so far, but this to me is a psychological mind-f**k of a read anyway. One that has you questioning Lucy, Max, the author and your own sanity at times. I'm determined to finish this series over the weekend, as for the first time in a long time I am TOTALLY DESPERATE to know how a story ends.
He enjoys seeing bruises he has made on her - ok I could go with that, but these bruises are on HER FACE. Conversely this means he isn't ashamed of what he does and therefore in his mind at least it isn't abuse. It's part of his control over Lucy. Though at times I got the impression all he wants is a doll who dresses, acts, thinks, speaks and poses exactly to his design. He doesn't want Lucy. THAT is where my struggle is with Max. And yet I'm still fixated and enthralled by the story - kudos to the author for such great writing.
"...I want to get you to a point that your thoughts are automatically centered on me. And nothing else. And that your behaviour is second nature."
She'll make a good wife... with a few more lessons.
So there I am hating on Max when he says
"But I don't want you to be afraid of me truly hurting you. I will never do anything to you.. that can't heal without damage." I want to reassure her not frighten her this morning.
So just as I step back from the edge he then tells me
I expect her not to close any doors to me. She doesn't have the right to privacy anymore.
aaaannnnndddd I'm right back at wanting to suffocate him.
"You don't have the right to decide what you do, what we do, anymore. I expect you not to make plans again, Lucy. You get my permission first."
I've been controlling and demanding.
"I've never lied to her. Lucy knows her place."
"You belong to me, Lucy. You are mine. And I want you dependent on me."
There may be times when she is unable to leave the bed after a spanking, legs and ass too swollen or sore.
She knows she can't argue with me.
Her cries only drive me to want to hurt her more. I stop and take a few deep breaths, she keeps her eyes closed still.
Lucy doesn't help matters either. She has me questioning her sanity on more than one occasion. I never could have imagined him slapping me, let alone me accepting it as punishment for breaking one of his rules. But he did... and I did. And now I'm forever changed somehow. I think and feel differently. It's all about Max, pleasing him, not disappointing him... not angering him..
It's those last three words that bother me. So often it's all about Max but then just when I'm back to hating him he does something thoughtful for Lucy. I turn to Max and give him a kiss on the cheek, "Thank you for thinking of this." I know it's really his doing. His attentiveness to me, his caring nature, is what I fell in love with first.
No, my old self didn't have someone who cares so much about me, loves me as much as I love him.
The number of times she flinches when he raises his hand - woah. She is on edge, she is jumpy, she is scared to upset or disappoint him. That is why this doesn't really sound a healthy relationship. I'm afraid to move or speak.
And he told me the next day that was the only chance he was ever going to give me to make a decision for myself. I no longer had a choice of leaving him.
And I knew he was right. My heart no longer had a choice. I'd given in to him...to his anger...to his control...to his love.
Seriously girl? I'm torn between wanting her to just get the heck out of there and respecting her right to choose that relationship. Particularly as there are times Max's control really does feel more like abuse. He frequently slaps, pinches and grabs at her. He seems to enjoy thrusting deep enough to hurt her during sex, he twists her wrist at one point, he controls what she is able to wear - even when this leaves her too hot or too cold. How is any of that showing care for her welfare and wellbeing? He gets angry that she "let guy's touch her" as though she can control the actions of others.
And yet again there are times when he DOES seem to value, care for and put her needs first.
I'm glad that I'm still in control of my anger enough to stop from slapping her as hard as I want to.
My anger is only slightly spent. I am hurt by her betrayals. My anger keeps heating up and I have to breathe deeply to get it under control again.
"But I can't punish you more... not tonight. You are too swollen already." Knowing that he's putting my safety and care ahead of his anger, even in his darkness, tortures me more.
I take aspirin out and walk back to the bed. When she returns I make her take these with the water. We have a long drive today and I don't want her too stiff to go.
"I want to make everything perfect for you, Lucy"
I still like Jake better "I don't want you to get hurt, Lucy, because he thinks it's the only way to love." He adds, softly, "You deserve better than that...."
August 19, 2015
Max is an a$$hole, and I truly think I might be in love with him. He never apologizes for the way he is, truly believing he is entitled to Lucy's obedience for the mere fact that he is a man. Alpha in the extreme, he continues Lucy's lessons on what he expects from her. When she misbehaves, she is punished... and it is brutal, but when she is "his good girl" oh how she is rewarded, and we are too because damn those are some hot scenes.
There are some side stories going on with Max's brother as well that make this one even juicier. Once again, the ending is that perfect mix of not a horrible cliffhanger, but still making you want to one click the next.
There are some side stories going on with Max's brother as well that make this one even juicier. Once again, the ending is that perfect mix of not a horrible cliffhanger, but still making you want to one click the next.
January 18, 2021
The low rating expresses my feelings of the FMC and how much she frustrated me!
I had the same feeling reading this series that I had with Consequences (the MMC
was less mean in this one), needless to say I was appalled by it. It's not a dark romance, it's more of a "consensual" abusive relationship, he wanted her bc he felt that she'll accept his way of life, but if he'd ever sensed any reluctance from her to accept him a 100%, he would have let her go, so he'll continue to look for "the one" for him. He took her without any effort or concessions (from him of course, bc she did a lot!). I didn't understand the female MC, too passive, not questionning any of the Hs decisions for her,even when she wasn't happy with them. I understand that one wants to let go of control, but not of reasoning, not at the level this FMC did anyway. She wasn't even unhappy in her old life to help me understand why she jumped that easily in the opposite direction. I don't know, maybe if it was presented like a real BDSM relationship, without that hypocrisy from the MMC wanting a traditional family and him being a traditional man not a kinky one, I would have believed it better. I would have understood her wanting a BDSM relationship but not an abusive one!
I had the same feeling reading this series that I had with Consequences (the MMC
was less mean in this one), needless to say I was appalled by it. It's not a dark romance, it's more of a "consensual" abusive relationship, he wanted her bc he felt that she'll accept his way of life, but if he'd ever sensed any reluctance from her to accept him a 100%, he would have let her go, so he'll continue to look for "the one" for him. He took her without any effort or concessions (from him of course, bc she did a lot!). I didn't understand the female MC, too passive, not questionning any of the Hs decisions for her,even when she wasn't happy with them. I understand that one wants to let go of control, but not of reasoning, not at the level this FMC did anyway. She wasn't even unhappy in her old life to help me understand why she jumped that easily in the opposite direction. I don't know, maybe if it was presented like a real BDSM relationship, without that hypocrisy from the MMC wanting a traditional family and him being a traditional man not a kinky one, I would have believed it better. I would have understood her wanting a BDSM relationship but not an abusive one!
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 29, 2018
THIS REVIEW HAS SPOILERS!!!
There was nothing "DARK EROTIC ROMANCE" about this story. This is a story, in my opinion, fulled with mental and physical abuse; NOT love, not romance, definitely nothing erotic!!!
I have read my share of D/s stories with perfectly strong Alpha Males but Max (and his stepdad Rod) is nothing but an abuser. There was nothing "Alpha" about him; the sex scenes were very lack luster for what he put Lucy through. Now, nothing is wrong with a little spanking if that is your kink; BUT, slapping her in the face repeatedly; embarrassing her in front of their friends and co-workers; jeopardizing her job; saying when she can use the bathroom, when or what she can eat or drink, telling her how to dress, how to speak, when to socialize ..... WHAT THE ACTUAL F**K!!!
Max was doing too much. I know in most series (this one has 4 books) things begin nicely, then go downhill, but eventually there is redemption for the characters and we get a HEA. I don't know if Max can be redeemed in my eyes. I shudder to think about what he'll do to her in the other books.
Again, I'm kinda glad this series is available under Kindle Unlimited because I would be pissed if I had purchased these books.
There was nothing "DARK EROTIC ROMANCE" about this story. This is a story, in my opinion, fulled with mental and physical abuse; NOT love, not romance, definitely nothing erotic!!!
I have read my share of D/s stories with perfectly strong Alpha Males but Max (and his stepdad Rod) is nothing but an abuser. There was nothing "Alpha" about him; the sex scenes were very lack luster for what he put Lucy through. Now, nothing is wrong with a little spanking if that is your kink; BUT, slapping her in the face repeatedly; embarrassing her in front of their friends and co-workers; jeopardizing her job; saying when she can use the bathroom, when or what she can eat or drink, telling her how to dress, how to speak, when to socialize ..... WHAT THE ACTUAL F**K!!!
Max was doing too much. I know in most series (this one has 4 books) things begin nicely, then go downhill, but eventually there is redemption for the characters and we get a HEA. I don't know if Max can be redeemed in my eyes. I shudder to think about what he'll do to her in the other books.
Again, I'm kinda glad this series is available under Kindle Unlimited because I would be pissed if I had purchased these books.
July 18, 2015
I can’t be the only to ever want amnesia just so I can read my favorite books all over again. This is the way I feel about this series by Willow Madison. I read the first book in the series, True Nature, and couldn’t wait to begin True Beginnings.
Max is a man who puts other Alpha males to shame. He controls every aspect of our heroine Lucy, and does it unapologetically. At times, I felt Lucy’s fear as my heart raced in terror. I felt her difficulty in accepting the things Max asked of her. Over it all, I also felt her love for Max and her desire to please him. Evil, evil man is just so sexy, she couldn’t help wanting him.
Lucy seems to be an extreme submissive. Everything Max does turns her on and even when she is frightened, she is also desperate to please him. I read on as Max slowly inducted Lucy into his way of life. He has rules for her and Lord help her if she disobeys or doesn’t do as he expects.
Max is a right a**hole, there is no doubt. He’s manipulative, chauvinistic, and sexy. Yeah, he’s a bad boy. And I absolutely would run the other way if I ever met him in real life. But as a fantasy, he’s just right. He hits all the right buttons.
Another character I’m really starting to fall for is Jake, Max’s brother. Jake… what can I say, he’s dreamy and sigh worthy. He’s the gentler sexy and I felt so bad for him in this book when he had his break with Julia.
The book was fascinating and well written, keeping my interest and my heart either racing or breaking. I loved the characters and I loved the story. I can’t wait for more. Off to book 3, True Choices.
Max is a man who puts other Alpha males to shame. He controls every aspect of our heroine Lucy, and does it unapologetically. At times, I felt Lucy’s fear as my heart raced in terror. I felt her difficulty in accepting the things Max asked of her. Over it all, I also felt her love for Max and her desire to please him. Evil, evil man is just so sexy, she couldn’t help wanting him.
Lucy seems to be an extreme submissive. Everything Max does turns her on and even when she is frightened, she is also desperate to please him. I read on as Max slowly inducted Lucy into his way of life. He has rules for her and Lord help her if she disobeys or doesn’t do as he expects.
Max is a right a**hole, there is no doubt. He’s manipulative, chauvinistic, and sexy. Yeah, he’s a bad boy. And I absolutely would run the other way if I ever met him in real life. But as a fantasy, he’s just right. He hits all the right buttons.
Another character I’m really starting to fall for is Jake, Max’s brother. Jake… what can I say, he’s dreamy and sigh worthy. He’s the gentler sexy and I felt so bad for him in this book when he had his break with Julia.
The book was fascinating and well written, keeping my interest and my heart either racing or breaking. I loved the characters and I loved the story. I can’t wait for more. Off to book 3, True Choices.
July 22, 2016
*I received a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review* Thanks Willow Madison.
I had to take a moment to process what I just read. My emotions were everywhere (I felt like I was on time out, tied up and put in a dark closet) After reading this book, I'm starting to feel like Max is a frickin sadist. Because the shit he did in this book. It's like that Rihanna song; "Work!" Just change the word to;."Rules, Rules, Rules, Rules!" Mr. Traeger, didn't hold back in this book!! I feel like we aren't getting the full story on him (like I'm waiting for the big secret reveal) And the scene at the company party (YIKES) I felt completely gutted and humiliated for Lucy..
I must say one thing, "Anyone else wishing something pops off with Jake (the brother) and Lucy??" I know it's coming. I can feel it! Yup, I just went there! Lol.
Now on to Lucy.. Oh, Lucy! Lucy! Girl, WTF happen to you?? My goodness! I just can't.
“Heigh-ho, heigh-ho, it's off to, reading book #3" [Whistling]
March 30, 2015
Max and his dad are in great need of a GIANT whoop ass! Being submissive is one thing, being a punching bag....
March 23, 2015
I just want to make it clear that there is a Happy Ever After, but it's going to be after you read the whole series : )
March 7, 2020
Thanks to the generous gift by Willow of the entire series,i am now able to follow Lucy and Max’ journey towards her total submission.
And what a journey it is turning out to be....
If you don’t like your stories dark,don’t start this series!
Please,listen to my warning,if you don’t understand the kind of relationship Max and Lucy have,with him in full control of everything she does,don’t start this series!
In True Beginnings,Max starts molding Lucy into the kind of girl he wants her to be.
Having had the choice of leaving once,and staying instead,Lucy has to know what he expects of her.
She may have had a rough idea of his demands,but now she is starting to find out how far he really wants to take her....
Follow his strict rules,or face punishment.
Her friends are wondering though,seeing the change in her behaviour and appearance.
His brother,however,is the first to openly question what Max is doing.
The hardest part for Lucy is standing up for herself,admitting she wants what Max does to her,what he wants her to do.
She still thinks things through,and maybe she gives in too easily,maybe it’s because she fears punishment,but.
She KNOWS each time why she’s punished,what she’s done wrong.
And she KNOWS she deserves punishment.
That’s what she consented to,that’s what she knows to expect.
And she HATES disappointing Max.
Max knows what he wants Lucy to become,but he admits to himself,he has to tread carefully not to cross the line into abuse like his mother once....
Lucy is the first girl to accept who and what he is,and that takes a little adjusting for him as well.
He explains the rules to her,and he explains what happens if she disobeys.
Seeing her do her best to be the girl he needs,makes him proud.
Knowing he likes to see his mark on her,calls to his inner sadist.
And knowing she accepts that side of him.....
This second part of their story took me deeper down the rabbithole.
Deeper into the dark.
And i love going there!
Can’t wait to start True Choices!
And what a journey it is turning out to be....
If you don’t like your stories dark,don’t start this series!
Please,listen to my warning,if you don’t understand the kind of relationship Max and Lucy have,with him in full control of everything she does,don’t start this series!
In True Beginnings,Max starts molding Lucy into the kind of girl he wants her to be.
Having had the choice of leaving once,and staying instead,Lucy has to know what he expects of her.
She may have had a rough idea of his demands,but now she is starting to find out how far he really wants to take her....
Follow his strict rules,or face punishment.
Her friends are wondering though,seeing the change in her behaviour and appearance.
His brother,however,is the first to openly question what Max is doing.
The hardest part for Lucy is standing up for herself,admitting she wants what Max does to her,what he wants her to do.
She still thinks things through,and maybe she gives in too easily,maybe it’s because she fears punishment,but.
She KNOWS each time why she’s punished,what she’s done wrong.
And she KNOWS she deserves punishment.
That’s what she consented to,that’s what she knows to expect.
And she HATES disappointing Max.
Max knows what he wants Lucy to become,but he admits to himself,he has to tread carefully not to cross the line into abuse like his mother once....
Lucy is the first girl to accept who and what he is,and that takes a little adjusting for him as well.
He explains the rules to her,and he explains what happens if she disobeys.
Seeing her do her best to be the girl he needs,makes him proud.
Knowing he likes to see his mark on her,calls to his inner sadist.
And knowing she accepts that side of him.....
This second part of their story took me deeper down the rabbithole.
Deeper into the dark.
And i love going there!
Can’t wait to start True Choices!
January 18, 2021
This storyline amounts to abuse just because he can. H: This is a maintenance spanking. h: The pain is part of your love and I crave it. It's how you show me how much you love me. If slapping me pleases you...then that's what I want too.... Ridiculous! There is no justification for his tough love. It reads as more of the same thing over and over and doesn’t progress past his “training” of the heroine.
What makes this book bad compared to similar storylines, which I do like, is that the heroine is just blah. She has no opinion or personality other than what the hero allows her to have, brainwashed; has not credible body responses to his abuse. It’s not just controlling or jealousy — it’s not even the “lifestyle” — it’s puppeteer boring, Pavlovian reaction. DNF
What makes this book bad compared to similar storylines, which I do like, is that the heroine is just blah. She has no opinion or personality other than what the hero allows her to have, brainwashed; has not credible body responses to his abuse. It’s not just controlling or jealousy — it’s not even the “lifestyle” — it’s puppeteer boring, Pavlovian reaction. DNF
January 20, 2015
Ok, I know I said I'd never read the follow ups but I just had to find out what happened. I'm by no means saying that the author has done a bad job with these books, not at all but because of the disturbing nature of the story I find it wrong to say I liked it. It's definitely a dark tale as the title suggests and well written. I'm hoping the story takes a turn around but I don't think this will be a happy ever after. :(
January 7, 2015
Once again, great read and I am hooked. Book 4 needs to be out soon :)!!!! Onto book 3.
March 9, 2020
It's my fault I started reading this book so late in the evening and I couldn't stop until the end, I even had to start with the next one in the series.
True Beginnings continues with Max and Lucy's story exactly at the same point where the first book ended, the very first pages being Max's POV and his Machiavellian mind, centered on one thing: the conditioning of Lucy to make her his perfect, obedient sub with "time and training". The way he extends his web around her, step by step, made my stomach all tied up in knots, tension gripping me until the last page.
Still not sure if I like Max. He seems to be angry all the time for any little detail and that may have been where the tension came from, because you don't know what the next trigger for his temper is going to be. I felt for Lucy, she's trapped like a fly in his spider's web, but the woman is totally in lust/love with him, in fact, his anger makes her wet.
The line between abuse and domination is a fine thread here; he starts to control all aspects in her life (clothes, social life, language, even the use of the bathroom) and that's kind of "normal" in a TPE relationship, but Lucy doesn't seem to know (not a 100%) where she's getting herself into, not yet, she's discovering it as she goes. It felt a bit abusive to me because of his anger issues...I've read other TPE books where the discipline was even harsher and there were even more restricitions, but there was no anger on part of the dominant partner, and Max feels like a ticking bomb and you don't know when he's going to explode...that makes for a stressful relationship for sure. I found also hard to swallow the concept that women should be subservient of men, in general, just because they're women, and the whole concept of "acceptable" femininity was truly creepy to say the least (I suspect it was totally intentional on part of the author, very well played).
I found fascinating how the MMC wants to make their special brand of loving known to their friends and family so they can be more themselves, that's a pretty ballsy move on his part, one that makes the h completely mortified.
Loved the introduction of Jake, Max's brother, at first sight a kinder version of his older brother but that makes you doubt if he's going to stay so sweet in the near future. I'm looking forward to reading more about him and if he's going to choose his family's ways or will continue to deny himself (is he like Max??)
Lucy's now completely changed ("I think and feel differently", "its all about Max, pleasing him, not disappointing him...not angering him"), becoming more the submissive Stepford Wife that he wants and loving it. Her world is narrowing down to what he dictates and she thrives on it, it's important to stress that she is totally willing even though some readers are going to hate it.
I'm going to continue with the next book, and I highly recommend this series to readers who enjoy the dark side of erotic romance; avoid this series if you're going to be offended by unconventional dynamics, or by things that are not the way you like...this book was written to stretch your boundaries, so you have to be open-minded if you want to enjoy it.
Thank you so much, Willow!
True Beginnings continues with Max and Lucy's story exactly at the same point where the first book ended, the very first pages being Max's POV and his Machiavellian mind, centered on one thing: the conditioning of Lucy to make her his perfect, obedient sub with "time and training". The way he extends his web around her, step by step, made my stomach all tied up in knots, tension gripping me until the last page.
Still not sure if I like Max. He seems to be angry all the time for any little detail and that may have been where the tension came from, because you don't know what the next trigger for his temper is going to be. I felt for Lucy, she's trapped like a fly in his spider's web, but the woman is totally in lust/love with him, in fact, his anger makes her wet.
The line between abuse and domination is a fine thread here; he starts to control all aspects in her life (clothes, social life, language, even the use of the bathroom) and that's kind of "normal" in a TPE relationship, but Lucy doesn't seem to know (not a 100%) where she's getting herself into, not yet, she's discovering it as she goes. It felt a bit abusive to me because of his anger issues...I've read other TPE books where the discipline was even harsher and there were even more restricitions, but there was no anger on part of the dominant partner, and Max feels like a ticking bomb and you don't know when he's going to explode...that makes for a stressful relationship for sure. I found also hard to swallow the concept that women should be subservient of men, in general, just because they're women, and the whole concept of "acceptable" femininity was truly creepy to say the least (I suspect it was totally intentional on part of the author, very well played).
I found fascinating how the MMC wants to make their special brand of loving known to their friends and family so they can be more themselves, that's a pretty ballsy move on his part, one that makes the h completely mortified.
Loved the introduction of Jake, Max's brother, at first sight a kinder version of his older brother but that makes you doubt if he's going to stay so sweet in the near future. I'm looking forward to reading more about him and if he's going to choose his family's ways or will continue to deny himself (is he like Max??)
Lucy's now completely changed ("I think and feel differently", "its all about Max, pleasing him, not disappointing him...not angering him"), becoming more the submissive Stepford Wife that he wants and loving it. Her world is narrowing down to what he dictates and she thrives on it, it's important to stress that she is totally willing even though some readers are going to hate it.
I'm going to continue with the next book, and I highly recommend this series to readers who enjoy the dark side of erotic romance; avoid this series if you're going to be offended by unconventional dynamics, or by things that are not the way you like...this book was written to stretch your boundaries, so you have to be open-minded if you want to enjoy it.
Thank you so much, Willow!
September 4, 2015
We pick up in this book where the first one left off.
Let me start by saying this is a lifestyle I could never fathom for myself. So, I don't understand how someone could give up ALL control of their life. Lucy has done just that. I understand that she is submissive but it's so much more than that with her. There is something deep rooted in her psyche that she needs and allows Max to inflict abuse upon her.
BDSM etc is a lifestyle that appeals to more people than you would expect and to be honest I think there is a large amount of women who like to give up a small percentage of control at times...thank you very much to Fifty Shades of Grey. Well, I'm getting off course here.
Max needs control and I believe most of that is due to how he was raised and what he experienced in life. But the anger issues concern me. As I say all of this I can't stop myself from reading this. It's dark and disturbing at times. But it pulls you under without an escape. The authors descriptions are intense, boarding on obsessive control. The step father is a character I'm pretty sure I don't like, the mother I can't figure out and his brother Jake...I see hope for. Yet he seems to be changing too!
When the truth is brought out to his friends, Max refuses to allow judgment and openly admits his need to discipline (which is so much more in my personal opinion). It's an uncomfortable realization the true depths of this man yet it is accepted. There are positive points in this story yet I'm still curious if Lucy can live her life like this forever. Does Jake have more behind his sudden acceptance of this lifestyle. I'm very interested in seeing where this will go.
So, once again this book will be very disturbing to some so I'd advice you consider how open minded your are willing to be before you decide on reading this book. The author did a wonderful job of writing this book. Each emotion is felt deeply and some are not so welcome, but she did her job in expressing her characters, their flaws and needs to us as if we were the ones in the story.
I will continue to follow this series to the end. I'm not sure I'll like what happens or not but I just can't stop myself. That in itself is the tale of a great author.
Let me start by saying this is a lifestyle I could never fathom for myself. So, I don't understand how someone could give up ALL control of their life. Lucy has done just that. I understand that she is submissive but it's so much more than that with her. There is something deep rooted in her psyche that she needs and allows Max to inflict abuse upon her.
BDSM etc is a lifestyle that appeals to more people than you would expect and to be honest I think there is a large amount of women who like to give up a small percentage of control at times...thank you very much to Fifty Shades of Grey. Well, I'm getting off course here.
Max needs control and I believe most of that is due to how he was raised and what he experienced in life. But the anger issues concern me. As I say all of this I can't stop myself from reading this. It's dark and disturbing at times. But it pulls you under without an escape. The authors descriptions are intense, boarding on obsessive control. The step father is a character I'm pretty sure I don't like, the mother I can't figure out and his brother Jake...I see hope for. Yet he seems to be changing too!
When the truth is brought out to his friends, Max refuses to allow judgment and openly admits his need to discipline (which is so much more in my personal opinion). It's an uncomfortable realization the true depths of this man yet it is accepted. There are positive points in this story yet I'm still curious if Lucy can live her life like this forever. Does Jake have more behind his sudden acceptance of this lifestyle. I'm very interested in seeing where this will go.
So, once again this book will be very disturbing to some so I'd advice you consider how open minded your are willing to be before you decide on reading this book. The author did a wonderful job of writing this book. Each emotion is felt deeply and some are not so welcome, but she did her job in expressing her characters, their flaws and needs to us as if we were the ones in the story.
I will continue to follow this series to the end. I'm not sure I'll like what happens or not but I just can't stop myself. That in itself is the tale of a great author.
November 10, 2015
I was given this ARC for an honest review.
Well, well, well Max is still Max! And I still do not like his ways! But Lucy continues to like the way he treats her! I completely do not understand this type of relationship besides Max is a total control freak who loves to discipline Lucy in every situation he can. Sometimes to me, this is just too much to handle but the way it's written still has me wanting to read more, only hoping for the best!
Well, well, well Max is still Max! And I still do not like his ways! But Lucy continues to like the way he treats her! I completely do not understand this type of relationship besides Max is a total control freak who loves to discipline Lucy in every situation he can. Sometimes to me, this is just too much to handle but the way it's written still has me wanting to read more, only hoping for the best!
February 29, 2016
IM??????????,? OMG if I thought book 1 was something I was unprepared for then book 2 was just.....BOOM!!!
I hate what Lucy is becoming though. I want to slap her awake!! Both her and Max.
*back flips of the earth*
I hate what Lucy is becoming though. I want to slap her awake!! Both her and Max.
*back flips of the earth*
Read
March 23, 2016FINALLY! True Beginnings available in paperback:
https://www.createspace.com/6131746
https://www.createspace.com/6131746
August 9, 2019
Rating: 4.5 Stars
Let the relationship begin1!! Book 2 is about Max and Lucy exploring their Total Power Exchange relationship. Max is taking over Lucy's life...period. There are rules and there are punishments. Max has definitely kicked it up a notch now that he knows Lucy is ride or die for him.
We get to learn so much more about Max and what makes him tick. We meet his entire family, his close friends and we discover his ultimate desire with Lucy. Wow...this was intense to say the least. Again, I'm hooked and can't wait to read the third book. I feel so naughty for enjoying this tale of darkness. This story is so different. I'm sure the author gets a lot of bad press about abuse and what not. I have to keep telling myself, everyone is not like me. There are many couples out there that enjoy this lifestyle. Who am I to judge? To each his own.
Why Not 5 Stars?
I still feel somewhat disconnected with Max and Lucy in the sex scenes. I do not feel the love and pleasure between the two...there's plenty of pain, but not the love.
Lucy, Lucy, Lucy - perhaps this is what happens during a TPE, but Lucy's character sounds/feels different. She is no longer that confident person in book 1. I get that she let go and let Max have the power, but she seems almost child like. Like a 16 year old child. Not the same Lucy.
Let the relationship begin1!! Book 2 is about Max and Lucy exploring their Total Power Exchange relationship. Max is taking over Lucy's life...period. There are rules and there are punishments. Max has definitely kicked it up a notch now that he knows Lucy is ride or die for him.
We get to learn so much more about Max and what makes him tick. We meet his entire family, his close friends and we discover his ultimate desire with Lucy. Wow...this was intense to say the least. Again, I'm hooked and can't wait to read the third book. I feel so naughty for enjoying this tale of darkness. This story is so different. I'm sure the author gets a lot of bad press about abuse and what not. I have to keep telling myself, everyone is not like me. There are many couples out there that enjoy this lifestyle. Who am I to judge? To each his own.
Why Not 5 Stars?
I still feel somewhat disconnected with Max and Lucy in the sex scenes. I do not feel the love and pleasure between the two...there's plenty of pain, but not the love.
Lucy, Lucy, Lucy - perhaps this is what happens during a TPE, but Lucy's character sounds/feels different. She is no longer that confident person in book 1. I get that she let go and let Max have the power, but she seems almost child like. Like a 16 year old child. Not the same Lucy.
July 27, 2015
Lucy is still madly in love with her Max...and she wants to do anything to please him...her punishment's are hard , but she takes them like a pro and even thanks him...she must have his forgiveness. I sometimes look at Max as abusive, he is harsh and afraid her will lose control...but then I remember he is not holding Lucy captive, she does have a choice and this is the type of relationship she wants with Max..This is intense...but good
July 19, 2015
I've decided to review once I'm done with the series.
no-way-jose
May 19, 2018Ahan, Claudia. Senta la. So hitting someone is bdsm?
https://www.goodreads.com/review/show...
https://www.goodreads.com/review/show...
June 29, 2024
After reading this whole series, and both alternative endings, I am revising my review down to 2 stars. This was a very emotional, uncomfortable, unforgiving, and exhausting series with no HEA and a sadness that will long be remembered.
This has been a difficult read for me. I've read 'Consequences' and a lot of books with a similar storyline, but I have never read anything quite like this, where the h is not subjected to this behavior against her will. The other books I've read have involved pain, domination, captivity and bondage, and the h fights and struggles for her life and freedom. This is a total takeover of the h's life and she's willingly going along with it. I just can't get my head around why, and maybe that's why I'm struggling so much. It's kind of like watching a horror movie; you don't want to watch, but you can't look away. This is a story that is filled with domestic violence, mental and physical abuse. It is NOT a love story, not a romance, not really D/s, and definitely not erotic. It's almost too realistic to be enjoyable, yet the author pulls you in even though you are uncomfortable.
The writing is very good. I think that this author is amazing, which is why I have continued to read this story even though I am definitely not liking it very much. It's unleashing the motherly instinct to save a child, so I know that I am invested now and want to see both alternative endings. I hope I can live with at least one of them.
3.5 stars
This has been a difficult read for me. I've read 'Consequences' and a lot of books with a similar storyline, but I have never read anything quite like this, where the h is not subjected to this behavior against her will. The other books I've read have involved pain, domination, captivity and bondage, and the h fights and struggles for her life and freedom. This is a total takeover of the h's life and she's willingly going along with it. I just can't get my head around why, and maybe that's why I'm struggling so much. It's kind of like watching a horror movie; you don't want to watch, but you can't look away. This is a story that is filled with domestic violence, mental and physical abuse. It is NOT a love story, not a romance, not really D/s, and definitely not erotic. It's almost too realistic to be enjoyable, yet the author pulls you in even though you are uncomfortable.
The writing is very good. I think that this author is amazing, which is why I have continued to read this story even though I am definitely not liking it very much. It's unleashing the motherly instinct to save a child, so I know that I am invested now and want to see both alternative endings. I hope I can live with at least one of them.
3.5 stars
May 23, 2016
Two days ago, after getting offended by my review, the author posted a blog post, claiming that I was "threatening to kill and torture her" when I wrote it in a figurative sense in my review that this book made me want to kill and torture the author. First of all, if she is an author, she would have realized it. However, I have removed my statement to prevent any future backlash from people. Secondly, she is clearly doing this for publicity. I did not receive a single message from the author asking me if I wanted to kill her or torture her. She did not even comment on my review. Instead, she started a whole new game of publicly humiliating and cyber-bullying me only because I was honest in my review about her awful book. I don't know if any of the people happily bashing me on her post know this but cyber-bullying is a bigger crime than me "threatening" her (which did not even happen). I will only say this. I would have changed my review if the author had at least talked to me in even remotely humane terms but she chose the coward's way of erupting negativity against me. Hence, I will not apologize. I will not change my review. This world needs love. It does not need people who think it is their right to bully someone to do what they want. I will not victimize myself by posting my own blog post. I wish that people who are calling me immature will see how immature it is to publicly say anything to anyone. Plus, you violated my privacy, Willow. That is not acceptable. Don't you dare think you can publicly use my name and then put yourself in the victim's light.
I am supposed to take a book seriously that starts with this:
This book is intended for adults only. Spanking and other sexual activities represented in this book are fantasies only, intended for adults. Nothing in the book should be interpreted as the author's advocating any non-consensual spanking activity of spanking of minors
My favorite is "spanking of minors".
And by "non-consensual", does the author admit her hero is so twisted he is basically doing everything without the heroine's consent? Because that makes this book totally pointless since the author is constantly trying to convince us her hero is such a gentleman.
We start off with these golden words by max:
I actually like seeing the small bruises. I worry this makes me a monster
You mean, you didn't know you are one?
You earned those marks little girl. For misbehaving. And I won't have you lying about how you got them
He's not even worried someone will report him to the police. Most people in any part of the world are still not accepting of the fact that people can consent to someone hurting them so do not give me the "this is dumb excuse" bullshit. Welcome to the read world, people
Our dear little Lucy manages to appear even more crazy in this part than she did in the first one.
Max told her not to drink anything he hasn't ordered for her but she still drinks something.
I know it's me. I'm just not sure what it is that I've done to upset him
Let's go back to Max's childhood. Max's mom abused him until he was seven until his step dad came into their lives and gave his mom some tough love. I can accept (grudgingly) that his mom became better due to his dad's strictness (although this makes no logic) but Max wants to keep Lucy on a tight leash for God knows what. Lucy is sweet and innocent (according to him). so why does she need tough love? See, the author can't even JUSTIFY Max's behavior.
This book also made me hate Lucy's friends even more. As though their constant use of decades old slang wasn't irritating enough, Tracy does weird shit like yell losers at Max and Lucy's face and go around laughing like crazy. It was obvious the author has no idea how girls behave in real life and she wanted Tracy to seem irritating to Max so she added this whole shit where Tracy is an overbearing ass.
Then, lo and behold, we have a robbery.
A
Robbery
Do you wanna know why? Because Willow wanted her readers to see how "protective" Max is and how he is the perfect knight in shining armor. ha ha.
When a thief appears out of nowhere and aims his gun at Max, he takes his and Lucy's watch and hands them over to the thief. For a controlling asshole who like to beat girls, he sure is a pussy when it comes to beating thieves. I stand corrected when I say this story is wrong on so many levels. And Max is more like teenage girl than a dominating man.
And just to convince you that her lovely hero is awesome, the author has every single on of her characters tell Lucy that "Max is a good guy".
If I had a dime for every time I read these words, i'd be rich.
It wasn't until I met Max that I....I saw how a man has to be in control more....of his own anger....himself....and the ones he loves
This, right here, is gold. I think we should give the author a standing ovation for writing something like this
![]()
And Lucy doesn't disappoint when it comes to convincing me she's cuckoo. She tiptoes around Max for God knows what reason. She laughs out loud (especially while crying). She stares at him without blinking then complains her eyes are watering. The list goes on and on and on.
We then spend a tortuously looooooong time in which Max's brother Jake breaks up with his girlfriend when she becomes too ambitious and Lucy is happy with Max for breaking them up as though he is god himself. urgh.
I am not going to hide who I am....certainly not from my best friend
Yes, telling your best friend you're a controlling freak and him not reporting you to the police and instead requesting to ogle your girlfriend's swollen but is totally normal.
I don't even get why he didn't tell his best friend before. They have been friends for a long time so why hide it from him if Max trusts him?
Plus, the said best friend's wife is even more accepting of Max and says that "it's in all of her favorite smut books"....
What book has a control freak who treats his gf like a punching bag? Why would people read this sort of shit?
You do make me so happy, Lucy. I love you. And I will always make you my good girl
I suddenly have overwhelming love for Anastasia Steele. In fact, I think she's the best weak minded girl ever.
And I...like that you ....that you do what you want....to me....I like that I'm yours
I wonder what irritated me more. The commas or Lucy's hesitant words that bespoke her craziness.
Knowing that he's putting my safety and care ahead of his anger, even in his darkness, tortures me more.
Bear in mind that she says this after Max decided he shouldn't punish her any further since then her body would be permanently damaged but our lovely Lucy sees this as his way of "putting her care first". Max can't punch a broken punching bag now, can't he? So that's why he isn't hitting you anymore, you stupid girl.
After this, I had had enough. So I skimmed through the rest of the book. Max takes a "more trained" Lucy to see his parents and happily shows her off.
Needless to say, I won't be reading the rest of the series. The author wanted a dark romance, she instead gave me a shitty book. But I guess shit is dark too. I have never seen an author so sure of herself who has failed this badly.
Final verdict:
I am supposed to take a book seriously that starts with this:
This book is intended for adults only. Spanking and other sexual activities represented in this book are fantasies only, intended for adults. Nothing in the book should be interpreted as the author's advocating any non-consensual spanking activity of spanking of minors
My favorite is "spanking of minors".
And by "non-consensual", does the author admit her hero is so twisted he is basically doing everything without the heroine's consent? Because that makes this book totally pointless since the author is constantly trying to convince us her hero is such a gentleman.
We start off with these golden words by max:
I actually like seeing the small bruises. I worry this makes me a monster
You mean, you didn't know you are one?
You earned those marks little girl. For misbehaving. And I won't have you lying about how you got them
He's not even worried someone will report him to the police. Most people in any part of the world are still not accepting of the fact that people can consent to someone hurting them so do not give me the "this is dumb excuse" bullshit. Welcome to the read world, people
Our dear little Lucy manages to appear even more crazy in this part than she did in the first one.
Max told her not to drink anything he hasn't ordered for her but she still drinks something.
I know it's me. I'm just not sure what it is that I've done to upset him
Let's go back to Max's childhood. Max's mom abused him until he was seven until his step dad came into their lives and gave his mom some tough love. I can accept (grudgingly) that his mom became better due to his dad's strictness (although this makes no logic) but Max wants to keep Lucy on a tight leash for God knows what. Lucy is sweet and innocent (according to him). so why does she need tough love? See, the author can't even JUSTIFY Max's behavior.
This book also made me hate Lucy's friends even more. As though their constant use of decades old slang wasn't irritating enough, Tracy does weird shit like yell losers at Max and Lucy's face and go around laughing like crazy. It was obvious the author has no idea how girls behave in real life and she wanted Tracy to seem irritating to Max so she added this whole shit where Tracy is an overbearing ass.
Then, lo and behold, we have a robbery.
A
Robbery
Do you wanna know why? Because Willow wanted her readers to see how "protective" Max is and how he is the perfect knight in shining armor. ha ha.
When a thief appears out of nowhere and aims his gun at Max, he takes his and Lucy's watch and hands them over to the thief. For a controlling asshole who like to beat girls, he sure is a pussy when it comes to beating thieves. I stand corrected when I say this story is wrong on so many levels. And Max is more like teenage girl than a dominating man.
And just to convince you that her lovely hero is awesome, the author has every single on of her characters tell Lucy that "Max is a good guy".
If I had a dime for every time I read these words, i'd be rich.
It wasn't until I met Max that I....I saw how a man has to be in control more....of his own anger....himself....and the ones he loves
This, right here, is gold. I think we should give the author a standing ovation for writing something like this
And Lucy doesn't disappoint when it comes to convincing me she's cuckoo. She tiptoes around Max for God knows what reason. She laughs out loud (especially while crying). She stares at him without blinking then complains her eyes are watering. The list goes on and on and on.
We then spend a tortuously looooooong time in which Max's brother Jake breaks up with his girlfriend when she becomes too ambitious and Lucy is happy with Max for breaking them up as though he is god himself. urgh.
I am not going to hide who I am....certainly not from my best friend
Yes, telling your best friend you're a controlling freak and him not reporting you to the police and instead requesting to ogle your girlfriend's swollen but is totally normal.
I don't even get why he didn't tell his best friend before. They have been friends for a long time so why hide it from him if Max trusts him?
Plus, the said best friend's wife is even more accepting of Max and says that "it's in all of her favorite smut books"....
What book has a control freak who treats his gf like a punching bag? Why would people read this sort of shit?
You do make me so happy, Lucy. I love you. And I will always make you my good girl
I suddenly have overwhelming love for Anastasia Steele. In fact, I think she's the best weak minded girl ever.
And I...like that you ....that you do what you want....to me....I like that I'm yours
I wonder what irritated me more. The commas or Lucy's hesitant words that bespoke her craziness.
Knowing that he's putting my safety and care ahead of his anger, even in his darkness, tortures me more.
Bear in mind that she says this after Max decided he shouldn't punish her any further since then her body would be permanently damaged but our lovely Lucy sees this as his way of "putting her care first". Max can't punch a broken punching bag now, can't he? So that's why he isn't hitting you anymore, you stupid girl.
After this, I had had enough. So I skimmed through the rest of the book. Max takes a "more trained" Lucy to see his parents and happily shows her off.
Needless to say, I won't be reading the rest of the series. The author wanted a dark romance, she instead gave me a shitty book. But I guess shit is dark too. I have never seen an author so sure of herself who has failed this badly.
Final verdict:
October 12, 2019
Whoa!
This was a massive upbeat compared to book 1.
Max and Lucy’s relationship has definitely taken a turn. Will not spoil at all but will state this may not suit all readers.
Domination is a word I will use lightly. Degradation, well I don’t know where to start.
Simply put, Lucy made her decision on where her relationship to Max goes. Positive/Negative choices, made by two consenting adults.
To readers, choose wisely if you dare to read. May have trigger lapses for some, but do remember this is fictional, though it does also happen in life.
Operative word .... consensual.
Looking forward to book 3.
This was a massive upbeat compared to book 1.
Max and Lucy’s relationship has definitely taken a turn. Will not spoil at all but will state this may not suit all readers.
Domination is a word I will use lightly. Degradation, well I don’t know where to start.
Simply put, Lucy made her decision on where her relationship to Max goes. Positive/Negative choices, made by two consenting adults.
To readers, choose wisely if you dare to read. May have trigger lapses for some, but do remember this is fictional, though it does also happen in life.
Operative word .... consensual.
Looking forward to book 3.
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