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Bdsm Basics for Submissives - Dealing With the Mental and Emotional Side of Submission
Over the years, I have found a lot of helpless and sometimes clueless submissives that were mentally and emotionally abused by dominants. They each felt like they deserved anything they got and never even questioned the dominants about their behavior. One of the hardest things to learn as a new submissive in the world of BDSM is how to navigate and deal with the whirlwind of mental and emotional stress that can come from being in a D/s or M/s relationship. Many people believe they are not allowed to feel any bad feelings, think bad or wrong thoughts, and always have to be a happy submissive. As humans, we all have to deal with negative feelings and thoughts from time to time, even though we may be submissives. This guide is a tool that will help you understand, analyze, and deal with different types of emotions and mental stresses associated with being a submissive.
46 pages, Kindle Edition
First published September 14, 2014
72 people are currently reading
380 people want to read
About the author
Michelle Fegatofi
6 books90 followersMichelle has been in and around the BDSM Lifestyle for over 20 years as a submissive/slave. She mentors and advises new people, as well as writes educational books and blogs on different subjects from a submissive point of view. She shares her own life experiences and incites in hopes of inspiring others.
Find her on many social media sites at:
about.me/michellefegatofi
Find her on many social media sites at:
about.me/michellefegatofi
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Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 10 of 10 reviews
December 1, 2017
Great ready highly recommend it!
This was an awesome read. It helped in understanding my emotional submissive self. There were tips and ideas that reinforced what I already knew as well as new ones. Great read highly recommend it.
This was an awesome read. It helped in understanding my emotional submissive self. There were tips and ideas that reinforced what I already knew as well as new ones. Great read highly recommend it.
May 5, 2019
Excellent read
Very good book of basics for newbies. Easy to read but not rigid rules, more of a primer with insight and sides for continually improving oneself and ones relationship.
Very good book of basics for newbies. Easy to read but not rigid rules, more of a primer with insight and sides for continually improving oneself and ones relationship.
December 20, 2019
Such a lovely jumble of ideas
This is not a coherent text with a thesis but rather a sweet and sincere jumble of ideas from the author’s experience as a collared submissive. Nothing wrong with that. Among her life experiences are some good ideas. I really appreciate her kindness in reaching out to other submissives. My main criticism is the author’s attempt at dealing with subjects for which she has no knowledge and no expertise. Anxiety disorder is a lot more complicated than the simplistic portrayal in her book. Ultimately, she offered no solution to a mental condition that requires a health professional’s care. Alternatively, she might have quoted an expert about how anxiety disorder is defined, given real life descriptions from submissives, and concluded with references for seeking help. The same for the subject of relationship abuse.
Too many submissives who are in service to a Dom(me) have no one to turn to as they have questions about themselves in service or questions about what is normal in a D/s or M/s relationship. Do NOT allow yourself to become isolated! Lean on our community for the sake of your good health as well as for support for the relationship.
This is not a coherent text with a thesis but rather a sweet and sincere jumble of ideas from the author’s experience as a collared submissive. Nothing wrong with that. Among her life experiences are some good ideas. I really appreciate her kindness in reaching out to other submissives. My main criticism is the author’s attempt at dealing with subjects for which she has no knowledge and no expertise. Anxiety disorder is a lot more complicated than the simplistic portrayal in her book. Ultimately, she offered no solution to a mental condition that requires a health professional’s care. Alternatively, she might have quoted an expert about how anxiety disorder is defined, given real life descriptions from submissives, and concluded with references for seeking help. The same for the subject of relationship abuse.
Too many submissives who are in service to a Dom(me) have no one to turn to as they have questions about themselves in service or questions about what is normal in a D/s or M/s relationship. Do NOT allow yourself to become isolated! Lean on our community for the sake of your good health as well as for support for the relationship.
October 7, 2020
Very well written and informative
This is an excellent resource for Submissive partners in a BDSM relationship. The advice is very helpful a nd nonjudgemental. A very good resource for those just starting out in this lifestyle.
This is an excellent resource for Submissive partners in a BDSM relationship. The advice is very helpful a nd nonjudgemental. A very good resource for those just starting out in this lifestyle.
February 10, 2018
Very Informative
The book is very informative and offers good advice for dealing with emotions in a D/s relationship. It’s a very good beginners book.
The book is very informative and offers good advice for dealing with emotions in a D/s relationship. It’s a very good beginners book.
February 4, 2019
Great informational read for any submissive starting out in the lifestyle.
December 3, 2019
Lots of needed knowledge
I'm thankful. I needed to gain a better view of my own sexuality. I feel sexier just buying it! Whoohoo!!
I'm thankful. I needed to gain a better view of my own sexuality. I feel sexier just buying it! Whoohoo!!
January 22, 2020
Terrific! :)
April 16, 2020
very good book a lot of good information
July 20, 2016
For a short little intro book, it covered a lot of subjects and offered some good suggestions. It could have used a copy editor before being published, but a good beginner book non-the-less.
Displaying 1 - 10 of 10 reviews