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Releasing What Isn't Yours
From a revered psychologist comes a groundbreaking, multilayered mind-body-spirit approach for alternate paths to empowerment and healing
If you’ve ever experienced a pivotal life event that felt as though it broke you apart and left you struggling to recover, psychologist Laurel Parnell understands. After the tragic death of her son, when expert knowledge in trauma recovery wasn’t enough to reclaim her True Self, she embarked on a journey that led to the development of a whole new approach.
Multidimensional Integrative Healing (MDIH) is a powerful healing method that integrates transpersonal psychology (looking beyond ego or the sense of self to explore deep spiritual and transcendent experiences), Eastern spiritual practices, and diverse spiritual and energetic traditions of the world. Dr. Parnell also incorporates Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) and Attachment-Focused EMDR (AF-EMDR), her protocol variation focused on individual attachment style.
MDIH recognizes there are different dimensions of reality that exist and can be accessed for healing. These include physical, emotional, psychological, somatic, and spiritual. By understanding these various dimensions, we can better align with our inner knowing and innate healing intelligence. Come back to the version of who you know yourself to truly be. MDIH can guide you to access resources that can be called on for help when needed, engage your energetic sovereignty, release energies that don’t belong to you, and finally move toward wholeness.
If you’ve ever experienced a pivotal life event that felt as though it broke you apart and left you struggling to recover, psychologist Laurel Parnell understands. After the tragic death of her son, when expert knowledge in trauma recovery wasn’t enough to reclaim her True Self, she embarked on a journey that led to the development of a whole new approach.
Multidimensional Integrative Healing (MDIH) is a powerful healing method that integrates transpersonal psychology (looking beyond ego or the sense of self to explore deep spiritual and transcendent experiences), Eastern spiritual practices, and diverse spiritual and energetic traditions of the world. Dr. Parnell also incorporates Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) and Attachment-Focused EMDR (AF-EMDR), her protocol variation focused on individual attachment style.
MDIH recognizes there are different dimensions of reality that exist and can be accessed for healing. These include physical, emotional, psychological, somatic, and spiritual. By understanding these various dimensions, we can better align with our inner knowing and innate healing intelligence. Come back to the version of who you know yourself to truly be. MDIH can guide you to access resources that can be called on for help when needed, engage your energetic sovereignty, release energies that don’t belong to you, and finally move toward wholeness.
254 pages, Paperback
Published June 16, 2026
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July 6, 2026I ultimately chose not to finish this book, and I find myself having a more complicated reaction to it than a simple star rating can capture.
My familiarity with Laurel Parnell comes through her work as an EMDR trainer, educator, and author. I’ve learned a great deal from her contributions to that field, which is why I picked this book up in the first place.
What surprised me is that this isn’t really a book about psychotherapy in the way I expected. Instead, it is largely about integrating spirituality, energetic healing, and shamanic perspectives into healing work.
To be clear, my hesitation is not because I am opposed to spirituality. Quite the opposite. I have a very expansive view of healing and I deeply appreciate the value of spiritual traditions, and deeply respect non-Western approaches to healing. I also found Parnell’s personal story of losing her son moving and could understand how that experience led to wanting to share with others a more expansive view of healing.
Where I struggled was with the presentation of these teachings.
As I read, I found myself increasingly uncomfortable with the idea of taking spiritual and Indigenous-informed teachings and translating them into a structured therapeutic model to be taught, replicated, and disseminated by people who may have little connection to the cultural contexts from which those ideas originated. While I believe the author’s intentions are sincere, parts of the book felt uncomfortably close to cultural appropriation for me.
At the same time, I recognize my own ambivalence. I am not generally a fan of gatekeeping knowledge, and I understand the desire to share meaningful experiences and practices that have been personally transformative. I don’t have a clear answer for where the line should be drawn.
Ultimately, though, I found myself wishing these teachings were being presented by elders, practitioners, or teachers who have spent decades carrying and stewarding these traditions within their original cultural contexts. For me, there is a meaningful difference between being an expert in EMDR and being an expert in spiritual or Indigenous healing traditions and without knowing her well it felt like using her positioning as a EMDR authority to step into another lane.
This may be a valuable and meaningful book for readers who are specifically seeking an integration of psychotherapy and spirituality. For me, however, it wasn’t the book I expected, and I ultimately decided not to continue reading.
Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for the advance copy in exchange for an honest review. As always, all thoughts and opinions are my own.
My familiarity with Laurel Parnell comes through her work as an EMDR trainer, educator, and author. I’ve learned a great deal from her contributions to that field, which is why I picked this book up in the first place.
What surprised me is that this isn’t really a book about psychotherapy in the way I expected. Instead, it is largely about integrating spirituality, energetic healing, and shamanic perspectives into healing work.
To be clear, my hesitation is not because I am opposed to spirituality. Quite the opposite. I have a very expansive view of healing and I deeply appreciate the value of spiritual traditions, and deeply respect non-Western approaches to healing. I also found Parnell’s personal story of losing her son moving and could understand how that experience led to wanting to share with others a more expansive view of healing.
Where I struggled was with the presentation of these teachings.
As I read, I found myself increasingly uncomfortable with the idea of taking spiritual and Indigenous-informed teachings and translating them into a structured therapeutic model to be taught, replicated, and disseminated by people who may have little connection to the cultural contexts from which those ideas originated. While I believe the author’s intentions are sincere, parts of the book felt uncomfortably close to cultural appropriation for me.
At the same time, I recognize my own ambivalence. I am not generally a fan of gatekeeping knowledge, and I understand the desire to share meaningful experiences and practices that have been personally transformative. I don’t have a clear answer for where the line should be drawn.
Ultimately, though, I found myself wishing these teachings were being presented by elders, practitioners, or teachers who have spent decades carrying and stewarding these traditions within their original cultural contexts. For me, there is a meaningful difference between being an expert in EMDR and being an expert in spiritual or Indigenous healing traditions and without knowing her well it felt like using her positioning as a EMDR authority to step into another lane.
This may be a valuable and meaningful book for readers who are specifically seeking an integration of psychotherapy and spirituality. For me, however, it wasn’t the book I expected, and I ultimately decided not to continue reading.
Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for the advance copy in exchange for an honest review. As always, all thoughts and opinions are my own.
June 30, 2026
Thank you to NetGalley and Macmillan Audio for providing me with an ARC of this audiobook in exchange for an honest review.
DNF @ 47%.
This book seemed to be exactly what I was looking for. As a former mental health counselor and someone who is actively in therapy, I have been trying to find ways to address the generational trauma that I carry. While my current therapist (and my preferred style of counseling) uses cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) in a patient-centered way, she isn't trained in EMDR, which is one of the gold standard treatments for trauma.
I am the daughter of a Holocaust survivor and former refugee. There was never a time that I didn't know about the Holocaust, when there weren't documentaries on the History Channel or books on the tables about WWII. I grew up hearing my father speak, bringing him to my history classes and learning more about his past. He loved going to schools and learning, and he passed that down to me as well. However, it wasn't until he had already passed and October 7th happened that the generational trauma really hit me hard. Watching the world change and turn antisemitism into the last acceptable racism, turning the innocent people kidnapped into 'occupiers' and 'colonizers,' was difficult and I'm glad my father wasn't alive to see any of this. Seeing photos of people holding hands to prevent Jewish students from entering a university building hit me especially hard - there is a nearly identical photo that you can find on social media, with young men wearing Nazi armbands holding hands to prevent Jewish people from entering buildings.
While I always love learning more about psychological techniques and breakthroughs, I was hoping that I would be able to utilize this book more in my own life. And I honestly tried as hard as I could, but had to DNF it just before reaching the halfway point. I knew it was time when I didn't want to listen to the audiobook and found myself actively finding even my least favorite chores to delay having to read more of this.
Honestly, I was hoping that I would be able to relate this information to my life. Do I lean heavily on evidence-based practices, both in my former profession and current life? Absolutely. I don't believe that simply because a practice isn't evidence based it isn't useful, I do understand that every theory or technique started out without being labeled as evidence-based, and that sometimes the studies just haven't been done yet.
I find myself struggling more with abstract ideas than with concrete or tangible concepts, and while I don't expect each book to be fully tailored to my needs or wants, I did try my hardest to remain open to these ideas. Parnell relies heavily on tapping, which I know some people find helpful, but it didn't feel comfortable or natural to me.
The audiobook is narrated by Parnell, and I can't write a review without discussing her narration. She has a smooth voice that is easy to listen to, and it is the perfect voice to lead a meditation - calm and soothing, even and just the right mix of soft and forceful. I could easily see how clients would find meditation easier with her leading it, and that's an area that I have tried to work on for years and consistently struggle. But if there was going to be a guided meditation I would follow, ideally Parnell would be narrating it.
Part of the disconnect I had while reading came from the way these meditations are guided. While Parnell does an outstanding job with the guided meditations, I had a harder time following along than I would normally. There was one specific area where i struggled more than most (I would guess), and that is incorporating ancestral guides and 'finding my well or spring.' The author discusses her British ancestral guides, but shares that her well/spring is in Tibet. I have a lot of respect for Eastern religions and their practices, even if I don't incorporate them into my own practice. For me, my spirituality is directly tied to my ethnicity as a Jew - I can rely on God and my faith and my ancestors, but there was one part of the spirituality meditation that was not a good fit for me, and that was 'finding an ancestor who is safe and well.' As far back as my great-grandparents on both sides, my family has faced oppression, trauma, discrimination, and violent pogroms in every generation. Finding an ancestral guide who is both well and safe is nearly impossible, even if I went back thousands of years as suggested. This made it really difficult for me to participate in the meditation, and it set my mind reeling, realizing that my intergenerational trauma doesn't just come from one generation back, but from basically every generation. The only reason I am alive is because my ancestors stubbornly hung on to life and Judaism, and trusted their intuition in dangerous times.
This book can be a really valuable resource for someone who is struggling to find their spirituality and ancestral connection, but it didn't do that for me. Learning more about tapping and how spirituality plays a role in mental health treatment and recovery was new for me, since I stopped working in the field years ago, but it makes me eager to see more of the new practices that come out and just understand how these techniques work. Overall, this wasn't a great fit for me, but I was looking for something different and had a hard time applying abstract ideas. I can still readily suggest this to others, even if it wasn't necessarily helpful for me specifically. So go into this with an open mind and take my review with a grain of salt, and see if it can help you.
DNF @ 47%.
This book seemed to be exactly what I was looking for. As a former mental health counselor and someone who is actively in therapy, I have been trying to find ways to address the generational trauma that I carry. While my current therapist (and my preferred style of counseling) uses cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) in a patient-centered way, she isn't trained in EMDR, which is one of the gold standard treatments for trauma.
I am the daughter of a Holocaust survivor and former refugee. There was never a time that I didn't know about the Holocaust, when there weren't documentaries on the History Channel or books on the tables about WWII. I grew up hearing my father speak, bringing him to my history classes and learning more about his past. He loved going to schools and learning, and he passed that down to me as well. However, it wasn't until he had already passed and October 7th happened that the generational trauma really hit me hard. Watching the world change and turn antisemitism into the last acceptable racism, turning the innocent people kidnapped into 'occupiers' and 'colonizers,' was difficult and I'm glad my father wasn't alive to see any of this. Seeing photos of people holding hands to prevent Jewish students from entering a university building hit me especially hard - there is a nearly identical photo that you can find on social media, with young men wearing Nazi armbands holding hands to prevent Jewish people from entering buildings.
While I always love learning more about psychological techniques and breakthroughs, I was hoping that I would be able to utilize this book more in my own life. And I honestly tried as hard as I could, but had to DNF it just before reaching the halfway point. I knew it was time when I didn't want to listen to the audiobook and found myself actively finding even my least favorite chores to delay having to read more of this.
Honestly, I was hoping that I would be able to relate this information to my life. Do I lean heavily on evidence-based practices, both in my former profession and current life? Absolutely. I don't believe that simply because a practice isn't evidence based it isn't useful, I do understand that every theory or technique started out without being labeled as evidence-based, and that sometimes the studies just haven't been done yet.
I find myself struggling more with abstract ideas than with concrete or tangible concepts, and while I don't expect each book to be fully tailored to my needs or wants, I did try my hardest to remain open to these ideas. Parnell relies heavily on tapping, which I know some people find helpful, but it didn't feel comfortable or natural to me.
The audiobook is narrated by Parnell, and I can't write a review without discussing her narration. She has a smooth voice that is easy to listen to, and it is the perfect voice to lead a meditation - calm and soothing, even and just the right mix of soft and forceful. I could easily see how clients would find meditation easier with her leading it, and that's an area that I have tried to work on for years and consistently struggle. But if there was going to be a guided meditation I would follow, ideally Parnell would be narrating it.
Part of the disconnect I had while reading came from the way these meditations are guided. While Parnell does an outstanding job with the guided meditations, I had a harder time following along than I would normally. There was one specific area where i struggled more than most (I would guess), and that is incorporating ancestral guides and 'finding my well or spring.' The author discusses her British ancestral guides, but shares that her well/spring is in Tibet. I have a lot of respect for Eastern religions and their practices, even if I don't incorporate them into my own practice. For me, my spirituality is directly tied to my ethnicity as a Jew - I can rely on God and my faith and my ancestors, but there was one part of the spirituality meditation that was not a good fit for me, and that was 'finding an ancestor who is safe and well.' As far back as my great-grandparents on both sides, my family has faced oppression, trauma, discrimination, and violent pogroms in every generation. Finding an ancestral guide who is both well and safe is nearly impossible, even if I went back thousands of years as suggested. This made it really difficult for me to participate in the meditation, and it set my mind reeling, realizing that my intergenerational trauma doesn't just come from one generation back, but from basically every generation. The only reason I am alive is because my ancestors stubbornly hung on to life and Judaism, and trusted their intuition in dangerous times.
This book can be a really valuable resource for someone who is struggling to find their spirituality and ancestral connection, but it didn't do that for me. Learning more about tapping and how spirituality plays a role in mental health treatment and recovery was new for me, since I stopped working in the field years ago, but it makes me eager to see more of the new practices that come out and just understand how these techniques work. Overall, this wasn't a great fit for me, but I was looking for something different and had a hard time applying abstract ideas. I can still readily suggest this to others, even if it wasn't necessarily helpful for me specifically. So go into this with an open mind and take my review with a grain of salt, and see if it can help you.
June 18, 2026
This is the ultimate toolkit with great explanations and guidance in each section.
The best explanation for MDIH is from the synopsis of the book:
"Multidimensional Integrative Healing (MDIH) is a powerful healing method that integrates transpersonal psychology (looking beyond ego or the sense of self to explore deep spiritual and transcendent experiences), Eastern spiritual practices, and diverse spiritual and energetic traditions of the world. Dr. Parnell also incorporates Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) and Attachment-Focused EMDR (AF-EMDR), her protocol variation focused on individual attachment style."
I'm ready to dive into a few of these. I've done EMDR in the past, but not like this. The alternate tapping method I tried while listening to this audio and going through the safe space exercise was powerful.
If you are into this healing style and if you are looking for a toolbox with great explanations of each step and a guided session for each, then this book is so worth the time and effort. I highly recommend the audiobook on this, because I've already learned so much in the time I've spent with it and want to dive deeper into the wonderful teachings here.
Dr. Parnell learned all of this from teachers in live environments and not just through books and videos. The depth and core memory implanting that happens with in-person teaching is truly magical. There's really nothing like it. It's always good to reach out to someone who is trained in these methodologies like Dr. Parnell. Look to see if there is someone who can guide and teach you in your area.
One other portion of this book that is quite important; the setting of boundaries and dealing with spiritual attachment. She has a few exercises and methods that she goes over for this. I seriously recommend that if you are doing something like this that you do it with someone who knows how to do this correctly, like in this method that she walks you through. The story that she shares about a group event where the group needed to cross over a tribal leader and the spirits of his loved ones and tribe members that were anchored in the land, where their lives ended, was magical and actually made me tear up.
One last note: Her narration is so peaceful and relaxing. So listen to this when you have full attention to do so, because it's better to absorb a voice like this, which is truly a wonderful gift she has and is sharing.
5 Stars.
Thanks to #netgalley and #MacmillanAudio for the advanced listening copy. This book is available in audiobook format on 6-16-2026 at all places where audiobooks are sold.
#ReleasingWhatIsntYours
#LaurelParnellPhD
The best explanation for MDIH is from the synopsis of the book:
"Multidimensional Integrative Healing (MDIH) is a powerful healing method that integrates transpersonal psychology (looking beyond ego or the sense of self to explore deep spiritual and transcendent experiences), Eastern spiritual practices, and diverse spiritual and energetic traditions of the world. Dr. Parnell also incorporates Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) and Attachment-Focused EMDR (AF-EMDR), her protocol variation focused on individual attachment style."
I'm ready to dive into a few of these. I've done EMDR in the past, but not like this. The alternate tapping method I tried while listening to this audio and going through the safe space exercise was powerful.
If you are into this healing style and if you are looking for a toolbox with great explanations of each step and a guided session for each, then this book is so worth the time and effort. I highly recommend the audiobook on this, because I've already learned so much in the time I've spent with it and want to dive deeper into the wonderful teachings here.
Dr. Parnell learned all of this from teachers in live environments and not just through books and videos. The depth and core memory implanting that happens with in-person teaching is truly magical. There's really nothing like it. It's always good to reach out to someone who is trained in these methodologies like Dr. Parnell. Look to see if there is someone who can guide and teach you in your area.
One other portion of this book that is quite important; the setting of boundaries and dealing with spiritual attachment. She has a few exercises and methods that she goes over for this. I seriously recommend that if you are doing something like this that you do it with someone who knows how to do this correctly, like in this method that she walks you through. The story that she shares about a group event where the group needed to cross over a tribal leader and the spirits of his loved ones and tribe members that were anchored in the land, where their lives ended, was magical and actually made me tear up.
One last note: Her narration is so peaceful and relaxing. So listen to this when you have full attention to do so, because it's better to absorb a voice like this, which is truly a wonderful gift she has and is sharing.
5 Stars.
Thanks to #netgalley and #MacmillanAudio for the advanced listening copy. This book is available in audiobook format on 6-16-2026 at all places where audiobooks are sold.
#ReleasingWhatIsntYours
#LaurelParnellPhD
August 9, 2026
In Releasing What Isn't Yours, psychologist Dr. Laurel Parnell shares her personal journey through profound grief and introduces Multidimensional Integrative Healing (MDIH). This mind-body-spirit framework helps readers identify and release emotional burdens that aren't truly theirs—such as inherited family patterns, relational baggage, and ancestral trauma. By combining transpersonal psychology, somatic awareness, and spiritual traditions, the book offers a map to reclaim your true self.
While this book ultimate wasn't the right fit for me personally, it is undeniably well-written and filled with deep wisdom. I have known that Dr. Parnell is a major pioneer and advocate for EMDR therapy. Because I have never been able to practice or engage with that specific modality myself, I worried the book might rely too heavily on it. Fortunately, the author blends in so many alternative tools—like dreamwork and somatic exercises—that you don't need to do EMDR to find value here. I deeply respect the author's viewpoint and her compassionate approach to energetic boundaries. I appreciate my ARC.
While this book ultimate wasn't the right fit for me personally, it is undeniably well-written and filled with deep wisdom. I have known that Dr. Parnell is a major pioneer and advocate for EMDR therapy. Because I have never been able to practice or engage with that specific modality myself, I worried the book might rely too heavily on it. Fortunately, the author blends in so many alternative tools—like dreamwork and somatic exercises—that you don't need to do EMDR to find value here. I deeply respect the author's viewpoint and her compassionate approach to energetic boundaries. I appreciate my ARC.
July 8, 2026
I am a big fan of EMDR as it has helped me with anxiety and phobias in the past. But Attachment Focused-EMDR seems to go further. Energetic sovereignty is all about setting boundaries and protecting yourself from others’ energies. There are some excellent suggestions on how to easily accomplish this like grounding, energy bubble, energetic cleansing plus many more. The sections on dreamwork, afterdeath communications and spirit attachments are to me best done with a practioner rather than on your own. They sound scary but definitely can be remedied.
The practices in every section are detailed but easy to do. This is a book to go back to again and again. I definitely recommend it.
The practices in every section are detailed but easy to do. This is a book to go back to again and again. I definitely recommend it.
Displaying 1 - 5 of 5 reviews