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Jeb and Dash: A Diary of Gay Life, 1918–1945
Not yet published
Expected 16 Jun 26Here is the journal of Jeb Alexander, a gay man who lived in Washington, D.C. during the first half of the 20th century. Documents his life and details the joy & anguish of his on-&-off love affair with college chum C.C. Dasham.
368 pages, Paperback
First published November 1, 1993
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Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews
March 22, 2017
Cross-posted at Shelf Inflicted and at Outlaw Reviews
Finally finished!
This book took me months to read and even though I was tempted to set it aside more than once, I’m glad I was patient enough to see it through to the end.
This is a condensed version of Jeb’s diary edited by his niece, Ina Russell, starting from when Jeb was 12 years old and ending a year before his death in 1965. This diary covers the years between 1918 and 1959. I loved the glimpse of history between two world wars, politics, famous personalities, plays, literature, music, observations on life and the world, and the details about gay life in a time when the word “gay” had a different meaning and homosexuality was a crime. I presume Ina Russell left out many details of Jeb’s cruising in Lafayette Square to spare the sensibilities of mainstream readers, but I think these details would have added some spice and richness and shown how dangerous and difficult gay life was for many people.
Jeb meets Dash while in college and throughout his story relays his deep affection for him. Even though his feelings are not returned, the two men remain friends for many years.
August 25, 1920
“I have at last found a friend, a lovable, handsome fellow, a realization of the friend I have dreamed of during all those lonely nights while I walked alone through the streets.”
February 11, 1921
“I want love and affection. Damn it! All that Stevenson said about journals is true. This diary of mine is a tissue of posturing. My real thoughts on such matters as sex are not admitted even to myself. I will be frank. I am madly in love with C. C. Dasham.”
July 16, 1927
“Returned home tired and nervous. Dinner with Dash. His entrancing personality so enthralls me! So beautiful, so beautiful. I would do anything for him.”
August 1, 1936
“Dash got his ticket, checked his bag, and gave me a strong handclasp. The goodness, sweetness, and steadfastness of his loyal, generous nature shone from his wide, serious, green eyes. That may sound like a rhapsody, but it’s God’s truth.”
The love pouring from Jeb’s words made me sad, knowing that he and Dash were not meant to be. I wish Jeb had moved on and found someone else to love. I also wish he would have fulfilled his aspirations of becoming a writer instead of spending many lonely nights drinking and journaling about his sad life.
The center of the book contains photos of Jeb, Jeb and Dash, Jeb’s family, a copy of a handwritten page in his diary, and places he’s lived in and visited. I would have liked to see some photos of the friends who meant so much to him.
There was some lovely, evocative writing here and a sense of immediacy, particularly in the last section during the World War Two years. There were also a lot of mundane details and too much repetition, some of which became tedious to read.
I would recommend this to those interested in gay history, the history of Washington, D.C., and the impact significant historical events have on individual lives.
Finally finished!
This book took me months to read and even though I was tempted to set it aside more than once, I’m glad I was patient enough to see it through to the end.
This is a condensed version of Jeb’s diary edited by his niece, Ina Russell, starting from when Jeb was 12 years old and ending a year before his death in 1965. This diary covers the years between 1918 and 1959. I loved the glimpse of history between two world wars, politics, famous personalities, plays, literature, music, observations on life and the world, and the details about gay life in a time when the word “gay” had a different meaning and homosexuality was a crime. I presume Ina Russell left out many details of Jeb’s cruising in Lafayette Square to spare the sensibilities of mainstream readers, but I think these details would have added some spice and richness and shown how dangerous and difficult gay life was for many people.
Jeb meets Dash while in college and throughout his story relays his deep affection for him. Even though his feelings are not returned, the two men remain friends for many years.
August 25, 1920
“I have at last found a friend, a lovable, handsome fellow, a realization of the friend I have dreamed of during all those lonely nights while I walked alone through the streets.”
February 11, 1921
“I want love and affection. Damn it! All that Stevenson said about journals is true. This diary of mine is a tissue of posturing. My real thoughts on such matters as sex are not admitted even to myself. I will be frank. I am madly in love with C. C. Dasham.”
July 16, 1927
“Returned home tired and nervous. Dinner with Dash. His entrancing personality so enthralls me! So beautiful, so beautiful. I would do anything for him.”
August 1, 1936
“Dash got his ticket, checked his bag, and gave me a strong handclasp. The goodness, sweetness, and steadfastness of his loyal, generous nature shone from his wide, serious, green eyes. That may sound like a rhapsody, but it’s God’s truth.”
The love pouring from Jeb’s words made me sad, knowing that he and Dash were not meant to be. I wish Jeb had moved on and found someone else to love. I also wish he would have fulfilled his aspirations of becoming a writer instead of spending many lonely nights drinking and journaling about his sad life.
The center of the book contains photos of Jeb, Jeb and Dash, Jeb’s family, a copy of a handwritten page in his diary, and places he’s lived in and visited. I would have liked to see some photos of the friends who meant so much to him.
There was some lovely, evocative writing here and a sense of immediacy, particularly in the last section during the World War Two years. There were also a lot of mundane details and too much repetition, some of which became tedious to read.
I would recommend this to those interested in gay history, the history of Washington, D.C., and the impact significant historical events have on individual lives.
June 12, 2012
This 284-page condensation of about 50 volumes of a personal diary provides a wealth of detail about gay life in Washington DC from WW1 to WW 2. Much of it is fascinating, but much of it is also repetitive and boring. The niece of Jeb Alexander edited the huge archive but needed to be more ruthless in her trimming. Probably 100-150 pages would have been sufficient. Ina Russell, who acknowledges she knew very little about her uncle's gay life, apparently has cut out some of the more erotic material. The daily entries mention Jeb frequently prowling around Lafayette Park (across from the White House) and other cruising spots, but we don't have much detail on what happened. It is hard to believe that Jeb recorded his itinerary without disclosing what took place in the bushes. There are a few hints of Jeb evading police patrols, but no mention of his ever being arrested. Perhaps he was lucky and never did get charged, but this memoir leaves that question unanswered. The book is revealing for showing the extensive gay underground that existed in Washington D.C. from World War 1 onward. The central story line is Jeb meeting a handsome boy at college at age 19 and becoming immediately infatuated. Although they had various romantic encounters in their younger years, it appears Dash didn't share the same degree of affection as Jeb and repeatedly told Jeb to back off. So they continued on as mostly platonic friends, but with Jeb always wishing for something more. We have this relationship described from only one side, so we can only speculate what Dash's true feelings might have been. In some episodes, they spend the night together, but in others, Jeb is shown as celebrating New Year's Eve alone while Dash is with other friends. The diary would have been improved if Ina Russell had been able to coax some of Jeb's drinking pals to share reminiscences for publication. More photographs of Jeb and his friends would have enhanced the narrative. Still, within its limitations, the book opens the shutters on urban gay life before Stonewall. A lot of gay stuff was going on, at least in D.C., even if the word "gay" back then usually meant "tipsy." There are also some lyrical descriptions of Washington landmarks, scenery and presidential appearances in an era when ordinary Washingtonians could encounter VIPs almost daily. Also memorable are the scenes describing the impact of WW 2 on daily life, with hordes of uniformed GIs roaming the city and its bars.
April 3, 2018
"Jeb and Dash" should more accurately have been entitled "Jeb versus Dash." After a brief romance in 1927, Dash's ardor waned, while Jeb continued with an obsessive, unreciprocated passion for decades. However, and in spite of the acute tension that sometimes existed between them, they remained close friends (though not a couple), apparently for the remainder of their lives. At his death in 1965, Jeb left an immense diary of fifty volumes, covering the period 1912-1964, and containing a detailed account of his life and times. From this archive his niece, Ina Russell, extracted several hundred short passages, covering the years 1918-1945, and focused mainly on Jeb's gay life in Washington D.C. Jeb is a sensitive, perceptive and intelligent man, with an exceptional gift for writing. His vividly detailed entries describe his family, co-workers, friends, acquaintances. As relatively little documentation survives for the lives of ordinary gay men before the 1970s, Jeb's extensive accounts seem especially valuable. Here we find Jeb and Dash, from their late teens to middle age and beyond, among a large, close knit and enduring circle of gay male friends. We get an almost palpable feeling for the time, place, and people. We see the quaint, gentlemanly courtesies of a by-gone era, the members of their set regularly meeting at someone's apartment, helping each other off and on with their coats, lighting each other's cigarettes, accompanying each other to a train station and lingering on the platform to wave good-bye, writing letters to each other, exchanging birthday and Christmas gifts, and generally looking out for one another. Of course we also see their love-affairs, jealousies, and quarrels. We catch their gossip as it filters through to Jeb. We see them cruising Lafayette park, finding sex-partners in cinemas or bars, or attending drunk and disorderly parties, ending with everyone stripped to the buff. Beyond the book's historical value, did I enjoy it? Basically, yes. Vivid, perceptive, and well written, it was a pleasure to read. However, I sometimes found myself getting impatient with Jeb. Jeb knows his faults and he laments them, but he never overcomes them, nor seems to try. He is painfully shy and also highly critical of others, and yet complains of loneliness. By his mid-twenties he finds himself in a rut from which he never extricates himself. His highest aspiration is to become a novelist. He resolves to work toward this goal, but he is without a craftsman's discipline and, apparently, an artist's inspiration. He yearns for a soul-mate, but cannot (does not) conquer his hopeless obsession for Dash. The sterility of Jeb's character, and his pointlessly perpetual pining for Jeb, actually depressed me. In one reflection, however, I ultimately took pleasure and comfort. Jeb never succeeded in writing his Pulitzer-winning novel -- or any novel, for that matter -- but he still seems to have left behind him a literary masterpiece -- his journal. When all fifty volumes have been edited, annotated and published, I strongly suspect that it will be acknowledged as a masterpiece, and that Jeb will take his place among the great American diarists.
October 20, 2014
I'll come clean and admit that I gave up half way through this book. I am usually persistent if I've paid for something but this just bored me. I suspect that the severe editing combined with the very safe life style of Jeb contributed to the rather turgid style.
The editor is a nephew I think of the diary writer. He is not gay. He states in the introduction that the diaries are quite extensive so they are severely edited. He 'removed the boring parts about the cruising' and the casual meet ups. I thought they would have been the interesting parts because what is left makes very boring reading. Jeb was a public servant so he had to be very circumspect in how he lived or he could lose his job. He was very shy anyway and not given to wild parties or rocking the boat. Basically if he were alive today there would be no place for him in a reality TV show. Although a sound enough man there is very little that stands out to warrant taking the time to read the edited diary entries.
The editor also took it upon himself to amalgamate certain persons into one, condense days into one entry and remove parts that might offend the living relatives of those mentioned in the diary. In effect what you have left is a very dry sanitised version of the man's life and largely impossible to gauge what he really was like. I couldn't see any point in continuing with dreary day to day descriptions of going for walks or catching a bus. These are no Orton diaries or Kenneth Williams diaries. The best of his life - or that most interesting to gay men - is probably on the cutting room floor. The editor, in trying to preserve the memory of his relative, has done him a disservice and a lot is lost to posterity. Try reading 'The Evening Crowd at Kirmsers' as a memoir of that time but in St Paul's.
The editor is a nephew I think of the diary writer. He is not gay. He states in the introduction that the diaries are quite extensive so they are severely edited. He 'removed the boring parts about the cruising' and the casual meet ups. I thought they would have been the interesting parts because what is left makes very boring reading. Jeb was a public servant so he had to be very circumspect in how he lived or he could lose his job. He was very shy anyway and not given to wild parties or rocking the boat. Basically if he were alive today there would be no place for him in a reality TV show. Although a sound enough man there is very little that stands out to warrant taking the time to read the edited diary entries.
The editor also took it upon himself to amalgamate certain persons into one, condense days into one entry and remove parts that might offend the living relatives of those mentioned in the diary. In effect what you have left is a very dry sanitised version of the man's life and largely impossible to gauge what he really was like. I couldn't see any point in continuing with dreary day to day descriptions of going for walks or catching a bus. These are no Orton diaries or Kenneth Williams diaries. The best of his life - or that most interesting to gay men - is probably on the cutting room floor. The editor, in trying to preserve the memory of his relative, has done him a disservice and a lot is lost to posterity. Try reading 'The Evening Crowd at Kirmsers' as a memoir of that time but in St Paul's.
October 11, 2013
Highly recommended! I could hardly put this down! I think I identified a great deal with the author. It's amazing how very little some things have changed for gay men. I really sympathized with Jeb's difficulties as he struggled to find a meaningful vocation, tried to find a voice as a writer and struggled with his sexuality and tried to find love.
More than that, it was fascinating to read firsthand accounts from someone working in Washington during the end of WWI, through the Great Depression and through WWII.
I hope someday my niece feels interested enough to go through my journals and find meaning in them.
More than that, it was fascinating to read firsthand accounts from someone working in Washington during the end of WWI, through the Great Depression and through WWII.
I hope someday my niece feels interested enough to go through my journals and find meaning in them.
November 12, 2019
Interesting diary, but somewhat poorly edited. I think the niece was afraid of the world knowing too much about her uncle's sex life so she sanitized it too much.
It would be interesting to see a new version of the diaries edited by a professional historian and not a close relative afraid of divulging too many of the family secrets. Since the book was published in 1993, a new editor might not be so afraid of frank discussions of gay life in early 20th Century DC.
It would be interesting to see a new version of the diaries edited by a professional historian and not a close relative afraid of divulging too many of the family secrets. Since the book was published in 1993, a new editor might not be so afraid of frank discussions of gay life in early 20th Century DC.
February 18, 2015
This edited journal of a gay man living among a group of gay friends in Washington, DC, from 1918-1945, provided a fascinating glimpse into that world. For me, one of the most memorable moments which offered a unique perspective of urban life during the Depression was when Jeb finds a man sleeping on a cot in his hallway. The landlord had rented out the hall for $10 a month. Eventually the cot disappears when the hallway tenant couldn't pay even the $10.
As a person, Jeb (not his real name)was obsessed with his sometime lover Dash and spends much of the early part of the book whining about their relationship. As one reader of the book says, "As a book it's a little down, but enjoyable--and I did get wistful when I wasn't wanting to slap Jeb."
As a person, Jeb (not his real name)was obsessed with his sometime lover Dash and spends much of the early part of the book whining about their relationship. As one reader of the book says, "As a book it's a little down, but enjoyable--and I did get wistful when I wasn't wanting to slap Jeb."
January 27, 2020
I really liked this book! I found myself identifying with Jeb quite a bit. The editing left something to be desired - the book came out in 1993, and I feel as though some of the juice might have been omitted. There were also large swaths of time without entries or explanations. I was fascinated almost the entire time I read this.
Read
February 15, 2021Read this book almost 30 years ago when it first came out. What was interesting to me then, a peak behind the curtains, hungry for any knowledge of my elders who went before me, and stunned how seemingly long ago the events took place. Now, I see the heartbreak, almost stalker-like qualities of Jeb, and monotony of modern life. Along with, the ability to make your own way in the world, choosing your family of friends, love of the arts. Sadly, somethings have not changed. The DC described in the book is full of racism, complaints that DC is not a state, and police brutality. One big thing that has changed since my first reading of the book, the internet. I enjoyed searching for locations and events mentioned in the book. Finding old postcards of the restaurants and apartment buildings, for that's all that is left, most have been torn down log ago. The location of the Krazy Kat Klub is in the same alley that The Green Lantern is in now. I'm pretty sure Jeb's friend "Max," is the artist Philip Fletcher Bell.
https://www.findagrave.com/memorial/1...
https://www.aaa.si.edu/collections/in...
https://outlet.historicimages.com/pro...
https://www.shorpy.com/node/3453
https://www.findagrave.com/memorial/1...
https://www.aaa.si.edu/collections/in...
https://outlet.historicimages.com/pro...
https://www.shorpy.com/node/3453
July 31, 2019
There is probably not much to interest the casual reader in this book, which is an abridgment of the editor’s uncle’s vast collection of diaries he began writing shortly before he started college in 1918 and continued throughout his adulthood as a closeted gay man in Washington DC. The editor admits that she left out some things that would embarrass living relatives, so it’s likely that some of the drama that could have been offered has been left on the cutting room floor.
However, as someone interested in the everyday life of gay individuals during the 1920s and DC history, this book is invaluable to me. I also found Jeb’s usage of the word “queer” to self-identify during his college years to be very interesting, considering the heated discussion about that word going on right now in LGBTQ spaces.
If you’re looking for insight into the average queer lifestyle during the interwar period, or the details of a middle-class man living in DC at that time, I highly recommend this book. If you’re looking for a thrilling read, this isn’t it.
However, as someone interested in the everyday life of gay individuals during the 1920s and DC history, this book is invaluable to me. I also found Jeb’s usage of the word “queer” to self-identify during his college years to be very interesting, considering the heated discussion about that word going on right now in LGBTQ spaces.
If you’re looking for insight into the average queer lifestyle during the interwar period, or the details of a middle-class man living in DC at that time, I highly recommend this book. If you’re looking for a thrilling read, this isn’t it.
April 6, 2016
This is a nicely edited collection of diary entries by a gay man spanning almost three decades in the early 20th century. It reads like a story rather than just a bunch of strung-together snippets from a man's journal. While it focuses on Jeb's one-sided (mostly) infatuation with Dash, it also provides a good insight into the dynamics of a circle of gay friends living in Washington DC in the last century. The historical artifacts of prohibition, two world wars, and the Great Depression make for obvious differences from 21st century life, but Jeb's feelings of lust, love, loneliness, and disappointment are universal. Jeb is not an entirely sympathetic character; he is pompous, judgmental, and a bit of a slacker who thinks he should be more successful than he is, but isn't willing to do what is required to become so.
July 18, 2018
Enjoy this a lot, but I like diaries, gay history and D.C. history. If I didn't know where the locations and neighborhoods were in relation to one another, it would have been a hard read. The editor certainly provided no such guidance.
November 25, 2007
More than just a diary, this carefully-edited story casts a warm and lingering light on post-war Washington DC, and examines a life of chronic Almosts. Recently adapted to the stage.
December 16, 2014
Equal parts depressing and inspiring, but the historical details of a life so different from mine, mixed with personal ruminations that are way too familiar, are what kept me riveted.
November 17, 2015
Abruptly omits the last 20 years of his life.
April 16, 2021
I give this 5 stars for "Jeb," but not the editor, his niece, Ina Russell. I quickly became enamored of this book and thoroughly enjoyed witnessing life in the first half of the 20th century through the eyes of a gay man in Washington, D.C.
Jeb fell in love with "Dash" in college, but that love was unrequited and mostly extremely frustrating. Their lives intertwine throughout, but, as is often the case in real life, never come together fully despite Jeb's wishes. Dash is incredibly annoying, and how Jeb maintained his passion is difficult to understand, but then, who hasn't had a similar experience?
Jeb wants desperately to become a great author, but other than a short story or two, he never seems to write anything, except for his diary, which contains the occasional breathtakingly luminous phrase--making one wonder "what if." Jeb is terribly shy, frustrated with his orientation, yet reckless at times. He never seems to achieve anything he really desires, and that's heartbreaking and real. Having written diaries in a long and difficult stretch of my own life, I caught many parallels and echoes, making my reading experience surreal at times.
My eyes were opened to the reality of gay culture in the nation's capital during this time--who knew! Seeing history witnessed in the moment through an observer was fascinating.
I'm deeply grateful that Ms. Russell produced this book, but am also deeply frustrated by it. Her editing can be brutal at times, with long months and even most of a year deleted here and there, jumping from one month to several months later, often with no explanation. She plays fast and loose with the real-life characters--eliminating some, combining others, and changing everyone's names. While she adds occasional helpful historical notes and explanations, many of these are obvious while one wishes for more explication elsewhere--for instance, Jeb's long stretch of illness, which appears after a lengthy edit of months, and which is never really explained. On top of it all, she simply avoids the last two decades of his diaries.
When I finished reading the book, I wept, not only for Jeb, and for so many who have experienced similar frustrations in life and love, but I also cried also in frustration because I would have loved to read more from his 50 volumes of detailed diaries. I understand they have been donated to a college, so perhaps someday more of his vivid and unique memories will live again.
It's a heart-rending, eye-opening, moving story of a real life that I hope will last through the ages.
Jeb fell in love with "Dash" in college, but that love was unrequited and mostly extremely frustrating. Their lives intertwine throughout, but, as is often the case in real life, never come together fully despite Jeb's wishes. Dash is incredibly annoying, and how Jeb maintained his passion is difficult to understand, but then, who hasn't had a similar experience?
Jeb wants desperately to become a great author, but other than a short story or two, he never seems to write anything, except for his diary, which contains the occasional breathtakingly luminous phrase--making one wonder "what if." Jeb is terribly shy, frustrated with his orientation, yet reckless at times. He never seems to achieve anything he really desires, and that's heartbreaking and real. Having written diaries in a long and difficult stretch of my own life, I caught many parallels and echoes, making my reading experience surreal at times.
My eyes were opened to the reality of gay culture in the nation's capital during this time--who knew! Seeing history witnessed in the moment through an observer was fascinating.
I'm deeply grateful that Ms. Russell produced this book, but am also deeply frustrated by it. Her editing can be brutal at times, with long months and even most of a year deleted here and there, jumping from one month to several months later, often with no explanation. She plays fast and loose with the real-life characters--eliminating some, combining others, and changing everyone's names. While she adds occasional helpful historical notes and explanations, many of these are obvious while one wishes for more explication elsewhere--for instance, Jeb's long stretch of illness, which appears after a lengthy edit of months, and which is never really explained. On top of it all, she simply avoids the last two decades of his diaries.
When I finished reading the book, I wept, not only for Jeb, and for so many who have experienced similar frustrations in life and love, but I also cried also in frustration because I would have loved to read more from his 50 volumes of detailed diaries. I understand they have been donated to a college, so perhaps someday more of his vivid and unique memories will live again.
It's a heart-rending, eye-opening, moving story of a real life that I hope will last through the ages.
January 3, 2019
I didn't dislike this book, I guess I have a lot of complicated feelings about it. I didn't "enjoy" it, but that was because the life of protagonist was depressing and honestly a little too close to home. So my "enjoyment" was really affected by my personal feelings. I guess that's inevitable with such a personal narrative, because it's literally diary entries. I do feel like it's misleading titling it "Jeb and Dash."
August 2, 2025
🌟 3/5
Mmm. Yea it was okay. Good for understanding gay culture and gay life in the early 1900s, but Jen is just a boring white guy to me. I don’t relate to him, his struggles, or his life. He has some relatable moments but overall it was hard to get through. I’ll still keep the book as a window into queer life in 1900s.
Mmm. Yea it was okay. Good for understanding gay culture and gay life in the early 1900s, but Jen is just a boring white guy to me. I don’t relate to him, his struggles, or his life. He has some relatable moments but overall it was hard to get through. I’ll still keep the book as a window into queer life in 1900s.
March 1, 2020
Big story of a gay man’s closeted life in WDC and his struggles. Lots of familiar places mentioned but a map showing them all would have made it a lot more interesting and useful to a modern day resident reader. A good read for my many commutes around town.
December 25, 2022
Loved this thorough look into early 20th century gay life in DC. Jeb was such a deb in his condensed diaries, especially as he aged, so the book dragged on quite a bit but many of the moments from the book will stick with me a long time. 3.5 stars
January 29, 2023
An incredible read. Truly a must read diary of early gay life in Washington, D.C. Again and again I learn the vibrancy and struggles of early queer life.
August 1, 2014
This book is plodding and tedious to read. Yes, it's a diary, but should have much better editing.
September 27, 2015
What a wonderful book! It gave me a sense of a familial past I can relate to.
November 20, 2017
OK memoir. The story of a Sad Sack. Remember him?
Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews