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The Rest of Our Lives
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BOOK OF THE YEAR
'Feels less like reading a novel and more like sitting in a car beside a dear friend . . . a profoundly moving experience.' ANN PATCHETT
'Deeply human ... a beautifully quiet and devastating book.' SARAH JESSICA PARKER
'Funny, wise and knowing.' CLARE CHAMBERS
When Tom's wife had an affair, he resolved to leave her once their children had grown up. Twelve years later, after driving his daughter to university, he remembers his pact and keeps driving West to visit friends, family and an old girlfriend.
But he also has secrets of his own - trouble at work and health issues - and sometimes running away is the hardest thing to do.
'Feels less like reading a novel and more like sitting in a car beside a dear friend . . . a profoundly moving experience.' ANN PATCHETT
'Deeply human ... a beautifully quiet and devastating book.' SARAH JESSICA PARKER
'Funny, wise and knowing.' CLARE CHAMBERS
When Tom's wife had an affair, he resolved to leave her once their children had grown up. Twelve years later, after driving his daughter to university, he remembers his pact and keeps driving West to visit friends, family and an old girlfriend.
But he also has secrets of his own - trouble at work and health issues - and sometimes running away is the hardest thing to do.
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First published March 25, 2025
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September 24, 2025
"I could have done without this" the main character thinks 2/3 into this book, and I full heartedly concur with him. Like the worst Woody Allen movie in writing. Shortlisted for the 2025 Booker.
He doesn’t really figure in my life these days but I’m going to talk about him anyway.
This book feels like Jane Austen in the worst way, in the sense that every character is introduced not by the salary in pounds per year but through their academical achievements and career, in the most unironic manner by the main character. Tom is an older man, 55, and a law professor, looking back at his marriage with Amy. There is a lot of resentment pervading the narrative, around an affair 12 years ago, about the raising of Miri, their daughter and about Amy not having a job. Then Tom also gets cancelled due to woke, in his own unreflective rendition of the facts. I would rather think his consulting on the side, taking up an expert opinion role for someone he used to work for, is also an ethical conundrum.
The Rest of Our Lives is a bit meandering told, in a voice that is close to but not fully curmudgeon. Besides complaining (over and over again) of his wife cheating over a decade ago he goes on and on about all the social house calls he does with his “friends”, people whose kid go to Brown (8% acceptance rate) versus his own daughter going to Carnegie Mellon (18% acceptance rate) and how visitors bring along a bottle of Pol Roger (not sure if in Tom's book this is an acceptable champagne or not). The opening of the second chapter is so inelegant, some name dropping of someone who did a PhD at Harvard in a confusing manner that doesn’t have any relevance to the narrative, and is rather exemplary of how Benjamin Markovits seems to write.
The "friends" of the main character are people who go to their club where a jacket is required, say to him lunch there is more expensive than he might expect but they’ll cover it, and have an illicit affair with their student. Or they want to start a class action lawsuit for white people getting discriminated in basketball. What is this supposed to say about the main character through which we perceive the world of the novel?
You’re a very frustrating person to live with his rather neurotic wife mentions near the end of the book and I wholeheartedly agree based on 200 pages. Besides the end of the book, which is quite accurately described (except for introducing a Dutch female student called Betje, which is something even my grandmother wouldn’t have as a first name) based on my own medical experiences, I didn’t care about anything I read and this was dangerously close to getting 1.5 stars rounded down.
Some quotes and further thoughts below but I hope I get this book out of my system sooner rather than later.
Quotes:
“You’re on the wrong side of history.”
“I guess that’s true.”
We don’t really communicate at that level anymore.
At some level everything you feel or think is a kind of taking sides.
We worked our way through all ten seasons, watching the show get steadily worse. People turning into caricatures, but maybe this is what happens to people.
I liked to think of myself as lower-middle class
I’m not sure I know what you’re talking about.
He doesn’t really figure in my life these days but I’m going to talk about him anyway.
I’m just… a little adrift right now. I can’t seem to get a grip on anything.
I’m sorry if I got it wrong tonight. I’m getting a lot of things wring right now.
Straight men who can’t communicate and then just go play basketball, watch baseball and drink beer or drive
You worry because it makes you feel better about yourself.
I never had a problem you couldn’t solve by going to the gym.
You reach a point in your life where you don’t want strangers in your life anymore.
There’s almost nothing you can’t do to yourself, that’s what I thought
We’re not really communicating right now - my god, are you dramatic teenagers or something?
You can talk too much about everything, I don’t know if it helps
He doesn’t really figure in my life these days but I’m going to talk about him anyway.
This book feels like Jane Austen in the worst way, in the sense that every character is introduced not by the salary in pounds per year but through their academical achievements and career, in the most unironic manner by the main character. Tom is an older man, 55, and a law professor, looking back at his marriage with Amy. There is a lot of resentment pervading the narrative, around an affair 12 years ago, about the raising of Miri, their daughter and about Amy not having a job. Then Tom also gets cancelled due to woke, in his own unreflective rendition of the facts. I would rather think his consulting on the side, taking up an expert opinion role for someone he used to work for, is also an ethical conundrum.
The Rest of Our Lives is a bit meandering told, in a voice that is close to but not fully curmudgeon. Besides complaining (over and over again) of his wife cheating over a decade ago he goes on and on about all the social house calls he does with his “friends”, people whose kid go to Brown (8% acceptance rate) versus his own daughter going to Carnegie Mellon (18% acceptance rate) and how visitors bring along a bottle of Pol Roger (not sure if in Tom's book this is an acceptable champagne or not). The opening of the second chapter is so inelegant, some name dropping of someone who did a PhD at Harvard in a confusing manner that doesn’t have any relevance to the narrative, and is rather exemplary of how Benjamin Markovits seems to write.
The "friends" of the main character are people who go to their club where a jacket is required, say to him lunch there is more expensive than he might expect but they’ll cover it, and have an illicit affair with their student. Or they want to start a class action lawsuit for white people getting discriminated in basketball. What is this supposed to say about the main character through which we perceive the world of the novel?
You’re a very frustrating person to live with his rather neurotic wife mentions near the end of the book and I wholeheartedly agree based on 200 pages. Besides the end of the book, which is quite accurately described (except for introducing a Dutch female student called Betje, which is something even my grandmother wouldn’t have as a first name) based on my own medical experiences, I didn’t care about anything I read and this was dangerously close to getting 1.5 stars rounded down.
Some quotes and further thoughts below but I hope I get this book out of my system sooner rather than later.
Quotes:
“You’re on the wrong side of history.”
“I guess that’s true.”
We don’t really communicate at that level anymore.
At some level everything you feel or think is a kind of taking sides.
We worked our way through all ten seasons, watching the show get steadily worse. People turning into caricatures, but maybe this is what happens to people.
I liked to think of myself as lower-middle class
I’m not sure I know what you’re talking about.
He doesn’t really figure in my life these days but I’m going to talk about him anyway.
I’m just… a little adrift right now. I can’t seem to get a grip on anything.
I’m sorry if I got it wrong tonight. I’m getting a lot of things wring right now.
Straight men who can’t communicate and then just go play basketball, watch baseball and drink beer or drive
You worry because it makes you feel better about yourself.
I never had a problem you couldn’t solve by going to the gym.
You reach a point in your life where you don’t want strangers in your life anymore.
There’s almost nothing you can’t do to yourself, that’s what I thought
We’re not really communicating right now - my god, are you dramatic teenagers or something?
You can talk too much about everything, I don’t know if it helps
September 17, 2025
1.5, rounded up.
Booker 2025 #6 for me to have read.
Had never read any Markovits, and bloody unlikely to read any of his other tomes, past or future. If there were any truth in advertising, this SHOULD have been entitled The Most Boring, Whitest Guy in America Takes a Road Trip.
The author is kind of the male equivalent of Anne Tyler, writing comforting, though rather dull books about 'ordinary' people and their very common lives. [But hey, Booker panel - Tyler herself, who inexplicably keeps getting nods, wrote an eligible book this year - why didn't you just rubber stamp THAT one?!]
In searching other reviews, I came upon this beauty for his previous (award-winning) book You Don't Have to Live Like This, and if you just change the name of the MC and the page number, it's exactly how I felt about THIS one:
Our first person narrator Greg Marnier is a massive Olympic-gold-medal-standard dweeb and overdescribes his daily life in hair-tearing facepalming detail. So achingly dull is most of this ... that many readers have launched it at the wall even before the statutory 100 pages amidst cries of “I can’t stand this no more” or “I’d rather have my face eaten by one of them revolting face eating alien things from that movie we saw last month”. If only these readers would have stuck around till page 172, which is when something actually happens. I too was one of those readers emitting muffled groans and sotto voce expletives and I was on the tippytoes of writing yet another famously cruel one star denunciation when I had an attack of perverseness.
It takes FOREVER for this to achieve minimal liftoff, and then we are just subjected to a standard issue male midlife crisis, that results in the aforementioned road trip, where various figures from MC Tom Layward's past emerge, none of them terribly interesting, amidst interminable games of pickup basketball (... Tom envisions writing a tome about such games, although there would seem to be even LESS of an audience for that book than this one).
Not only is the story being told plodding, but it is rendered in the flattest prose imaginable. And the final quarter of the book suddenly morphs into a maudlin and rather quesy medical drama, but by that time I was kind of hoping for Tom's swift and imminent demise.
So why 2 stars instead of one? Well, as the book went along, I grudgingly found a few glimmers of interest; it was short enough I knocked it off in one day - and it has probably the coolest cover of any of the Booker Baker's Dozen! And I reserve 1 star for the truly unreadable, which this marginally skirts. But once again, HOW could the judges include this mediocrity when so many worthier novels were tossed asunder? (... where's Ripeness? Muckle Flugga? Our Evenings?!!)
Booker 2025 #6 for me to have read.
Had never read any Markovits, and bloody unlikely to read any of his other tomes, past or future. If there were any truth in advertising, this SHOULD have been entitled The Most Boring, Whitest Guy in America Takes a Road Trip.
The author is kind of the male equivalent of Anne Tyler, writing comforting, though rather dull books about 'ordinary' people and their very common lives. [But hey, Booker panel - Tyler herself, who inexplicably keeps getting nods, wrote an eligible book this year - why didn't you just rubber stamp THAT one?!]
In searching other reviews, I came upon this beauty for his previous (award-winning) book You Don't Have to Live Like This, and if you just change the name of the MC and the page number, it's exactly how I felt about THIS one:
Our first person narrator Greg Marnier is a massive Olympic-gold-medal-standard dweeb and overdescribes his daily life in hair-tearing facepalming detail. So achingly dull is most of this ... that many readers have launched it at the wall even before the statutory 100 pages amidst cries of “I can’t stand this no more” or “I’d rather have my face eaten by one of them revolting face eating alien things from that movie we saw last month”. If only these readers would have stuck around till page 172, which is when something actually happens. I too was one of those readers emitting muffled groans and sotto voce expletives and I was on the tippytoes of writing yet another famously cruel one star denunciation when I had an attack of perverseness.
It takes FOREVER for this to achieve minimal liftoff, and then we are just subjected to a standard issue male midlife crisis, that results in the aforementioned road trip, where various figures from MC Tom Layward's past emerge, none of them terribly interesting, amidst interminable games of pickup basketball (... Tom envisions writing a tome about such games, although there would seem to be even LESS of an audience for that book than this one).
Not only is the story being told plodding, but it is rendered in the flattest prose imaginable. And the final quarter of the book suddenly morphs into a maudlin and rather quesy medical drama, but by that time I was kind of hoping for Tom's swift and imminent demise.
So why 2 stars instead of one? Well, as the book went along, I grudgingly found a few glimmers of interest; it was short enough I knocked it off in one day - and it has probably the coolest cover of any of the Booker Baker's Dozen! And I reserve 1 star for the truly unreadable, which this marginally skirts. But once again, HOW could the judges include this mediocrity when so many worthier novels were tossed asunder? (... where's Ripeness? Muckle Flugga? Our Evenings?!!)
September 23, 2025
Update : Now shorlisted for the Booker Prize 2025
This is the sort of okay book that you don’t want to find on a Booker longlist, but you understand why it was chosen. It deals with the most fashionable subject at the moment (see how Adolescence won everything at the Emmys while being just an okay show): the crisis of masculinity. For me, it didn’t say anything new or in an interesting way.
I also understand the comparisons with All Fours, but the protagonist here is so much less compelling. His interests were just boring, and the author seemed too afraid to say anything meaningful about his chosen themes, such as wokism or racism.
Anyway, I’m gonna repeat myself. Despite the criticism, this is an okay book. Hopefully, the win was simply making it onto the longlist.
This is the sort of okay book that you don’t want to find on a Booker longlist, but you understand why it was chosen. It deals with the most fashionable subject at the moment (see how Adolescence won everything at the Emmys while being just an okay show): the crisis of masculinity. For me, it didn’t say anything new or in an interesting way.
I also understand the comparisons with All Fours, but the protagonist here is so much less compelling. His interests were just boring, and the author seemed too afraid to say anything meaningful about his chosen themes, such as wokism or racism.
Anyway, I’m gonna repeat myself. Despite the criticism, this is an okay book. Hopefully, the win was simply making it onto the longlist.
November 12, 2024
"Nobody tells you what an intense experience loneliness is, how it has a lot of variations..."
Let me start by saying I didn't know what to expect from this book. A Jazzy cover, a title implying a romance, few reviews online for me to pre-empt a narrative. None of that mattered when I jumped in to this book.
Following the life of protagonist Tom as he drops his daughter at college and takes himself on a long trip across country meeting friends of old and strangers at basketball courts - this novel plunges straight into male mental health and what it's like getting by when there's nobody there who knows what's happening inside your head.
I freaking loved this book for how matter-of-fact and easy to read it was whilst simultaneously touching on deep topics and the tragedy of your life passing you by.
Highly recommended if you want to read something real and something that will resonate.
Let me start by saying I didn't know what to expect from this book. A Jazzy cover, a title implying a romance, few reviews online for me to pre-empt a narrative. None of that mattered when I jumped in to this book.
Following the life of protagonist Tom as he drops his daughter at college and takes himself on a long trip across country meeting friends of old and strangers at basketball courts - this novel plunges straight into male mental health and what it's like getting by when there's nobody there who knows what's happening inside your head.
I freaking loved this book for how matter-of-fact and easy to read it was whilst simultaneously touching on deep topics and the tragedy of your life passing you by.
Highly recommended if you want to read something real and something that will resonate.
March 12, 2025
I'm still unclear about my feelings toward this book. It started off with a definite premise - a man whose youngest child has gone to college has to decide whether or not to leave the wife who cheated on him 10 years before. He had always told her that he would stay until the children left. So after he drives the girl to college he just keeps on driving with the pretext, to himself, that he is merely going to see old college buddies and his son.
As the journey continues, however, his health begins to suffer and his plans become even less coherent.
I think it was the second half of the book that had me confused because it seemed to be all about the things he didn't want rather than making any real decisions. His inability to even care for himself became quite monotonous.
There is also quite a bit of narrative about sports (especially basketball) none if which I understood or had an interest in.
So though it started off interesting, I'm afraid I got rather bored towards the end. None of the characters were particularly sympathetic either - the husband was apathetic, the wife was whiny, the son was judgemental and the daughter appeared divorced from relationships with any of them. There's also some casual racism that goes unchallenged and I found that part hard to read.
I simply picked the wrong book. It wasn't for me.
Thankyou to Netgalley and Faber & Faber for the advance review copy.
As the journey continues, however, his health begins to suffer and his plans become even less coherent.
I think it was the second half of the book that had me confused because it seemed to be all about the things he didn't want rather than making any real decisions. His inability to even care for himself became quite monotonous.
There is also quite a bit of narrative about sports (especially basketball) none if which I understood or had an interest in.
So though it started off interesting, I'm afraid I got rather bored towards the end. None of the characters were particularly sympathetic either - the husband was apathetic, the wife was whiny, the son was judgemental and the daughter appeared divorced from relationships with any of them. There's also some casual racism that goes unchallenged and I found that part hard to read.
I simply picked the wrong book. It wasn't for me.
Thankyou to Netgalley and Faber & Faber for the advance review copy.
Read
September 30, 2025Shortlisted for the Booker Prize 2025
3.5
"Is the idea of healing to get you back to the way you used to be or to turn you into something new?"
When Tom Layward learned that his wife Amy had an affair, he vowed to leave her after his youngest child left home for university. Twelve years later, suspended from his job as a law professor, he dropped his daughter off in Pittsburgh and kept driving west. Despite signs of poor health, Tom begins a road trip that links past and present, visiting his brother, an old girlfriend, a college buddy, and his son. By crafting the novel in the first person, Markovits provides access to Layward's inner, if somewhat muddled, world.
The Rest of Our Lives is low-key for an American road novel. Layward appears distant from the events of his life and views himself as blameless for everything that has gone wrong: his suspension from his job, his wife's infidelity, and his poor health. The trip becomes his mechanism for
regaining control without confronting his problems.
I liked the novel. It's short, moves quickly, and keeps the reader in the moment. Markovitz is a polished writer and is adept at blending humour with sorrow. Despite its strengths, I was surprised that it made the Booker shortlist as it doesn't break new ground in content, style, or structure. Its inclusion in the shortlist made me realize how little I understand the judges' criteria. Booker lists aside, I recommend The Rest of Our Lives. It's a great read.
3.5
"Is the idea of healing to get you back to the way you used to be or to turn you into something new?"
When Tom Layward learned that his wife Amy had an affair, he vowed to leave her after his youngest child left home for university. Twelve years later, suspended from his job as a law professor, he dropped his daughter off in Pittsburgh and kept driving west. Despite signs of poor health, Tom begins a road trip that links past and present, visiting his brother, an old girlfriend, a college buddy, and his son. By crafting the novel in the first person, Markovits provides access to Layward's inner, if somewhat muddled, world.
The Rest of Our Lives is low-key for an American road novel. Layward appears distant from the events of his life and views himself as blameless for everything that has gone wrong: his suspension from his job, his wife's infidelity, and his poor health. The trip becomes his mechanism for
regaining control without confronting his problems.
I liked the novel. It's short, moves quickly, and keeps the reader in the moment. Markovitz is a polished writer and is adept at blending humour with sorrow. Despite its strengths, I was surprised that it made the Booker shortlist as it doesn't break new ground in content, style, or structure. Its inclusion in the shortlist made me realize how little I understand the judges' criteria. Booker lists aside, I recommend The Rest of Our Lives. It's a great read.
November 7, 2025
Twelve years ago, lawyer Tom Layward chose to stay with his wife after her affair, deciding that when his youngest child, daughter Miriam, left for college, he would reevaluate his marriage and potentially leave Amy. The time has now come to drop Miriam off, and after he does so, he just keeps driving west.
The novel chronicles his trip across the country and into himself as he deals with some increasingly serious health concerns, a possible new court case he doesn't have the energy for, various pick-up basketball games, and a plentitude of strangers and old acquaintances he sees along his drive. Told in a close 1st person voice of a man beginning to recognize the resurfacing of past problems he's suppressed, the novel reckons with big themes of family and marriage, complicity, ambition, achievement, and what success really looks like when looking back on life.
I found Tom to be a delightfully sincere, if not sometimes oblivious, character to follow. He seems to be doing his best; he's been wronged, but recognizes when his own shortcomings have led to further difficulties. He's at a turning point in his life, and Markovits does a great job of presenting him without falling into stereotypes/cliches.
The writing in this is simple but profound. There were so many ways that Tom internalizes his feelings and has conversations with himself that I found relatable. He's more comfortable dealing with his problems alone, or so he thinks; and over the course of the road trip, begins to understand how to open up, rely on others, be in community, and move forward instead of constantly looking back.
I will also say, without spoiling anything, there is a turn in the last third of the novel that dealt with topics very close to my heart. Especially in relation to a father/son dynamic in a particular locale that I found quite effective and moving; I know for me it brought up a lot of old memories and feelings that maybe it won't quite have the same effect on for others, but that is the beauty of literature! This story felt, in some ways, tailored to me as both a reader, a son, a man, and an American.
Though this is on the Booker Prize shortlist, I don't necessarily see it winning and am fine if it doesn't. Nevertheless, I am so glad this was nominated if only to put it on my radar. I had quite low expectations because so many felt differently about it than I did (which is fine, but just goes to show you can't always know how a book will work for you until you give it a shot), and I'm happy to say I loved this one and will be thinking about it for quite a while.
The novel chronicles his trip across the country and into himself as he deals with some increasingly serious health concerns, a possible new court case he doesn't have the energy for, various pick-up basketball games, and a plentitude of strangers and old acquaintances he sees along his drive. Told in a close 1st person voice of a man beginning to recognize the resurfacing of past problems he's suppressed, the novel reckons with big themes of family and marriage, complicity, ambition, achievement, and what success really looks like when looking back on life.
I found Tom to be a delightfully sincere, if not sometimes oblivious, character to follow. He seems to be doing his best; he's been wronged, but recognizes when his own shortcomings have led to further difficulties. He's at a turning point in his life, and Markovits does a great job of presenting him without falling into stereotypes/cliches.
The writing in this is simple but profound. There were so many ways that Tom internalizes his feelings and has conversations with himself that I found relatable. He's more comfortable dealing with his problems alone, or so he thinks; and over the course of the road trip, begins to understand how to open up, rely on others, be in community, and move forward instead of constantly looking back.
I will also say, without spoiling anything, there is a turn in the last third of the novel that dealt with topics very close to my heart. Especially in relation to a father/son dynamic in a particular locale that I found quite effective and moving; I know for me it brought up a lot of old memories and feelings that maybe it won't quite have the same effect on for others, but that is the beauty of literature! This story felt, in some ways, tailored to me as both a reader, a son, a man, and an American.
Though this is on the Booker Prize shortlist, I don't necessarily see it winning and am fine if it doesn't. Nevertheless, I am so glad this was nominated if only to put it on my radar. I had quite low expectations because so many felt differently about it than I did (which is fine, but just goes to show you can't always know how a book will work for you until you give it a shot), and I'm happy to say I loved this one and will be thinking about it for quite a while.
August 26, 2025
After a bit of time to marinate, I've decided that the reason this didn't really work for me was that it felt like 3 separate books and I didn't like all of them. There were moments when I liked this much more than my star rating suggests; specifically the first third of the novel which I found to be quite a thoughtful but light consideration of moving out of the phase of active parenting. At that point, this felt sort of Nick Hornby-esque and although it wasn't giving BOOKER vibes, I was enjoying it. I found the second 2 thirds a bit less coherent and compelling and the storytelling lost some of its charm. Basically, a bit too disjointed for me.
April 14, 2025
I absolutely loved this book. I can’t stop thinking about it. A dad drops his kid off at college then just carries on driving, visiting old friends from his youth on the way. I do love a road trip story and this fits that bill but it is also so much more. It’s heartfelt and poignant and I now want to read everything this guy has ever written!!
September 24, 2025
Shortlisted for the Booker Prize 2025
My first real disappointment of this year's list. Not saying this is a bad book, but its main protagonist never really engaged my sympathy and I got a little bored. It is also a very American book.
My first real disappointment of this year's list. Not saying this is a bad book, but its main protagonist never really engaged my sympathy and I got a little bored. It is also a very American book.
September 23, 2025
*** Shortlisted for the 2025 Booker Prize ***
”I'm just a middle-aged guy, getting older.”
Tom Leyward doesn't recognise the face that peers at him from the bathroom mirror in the morning. Puffy, with eyes leaking water, which take hours to settle. When he gets up too quickly he gets head spins. His body doesn't correlate with how he feels in his mind. It's all gone by too fast.
After dropping his daughter off to start college, on a whim Tom starts his own road trip. Reminiscing over the past, and trying to figure out the present. His marriage to his wife Amy is hanging by a thread, and he's unsure if he's really left her or not.
”These things happen-families end up a certain way.”
Visiting old friends, colleagues, his estranged younger brother and girlfriend from his college days, Tom is trying to figure it all out.
We go backwards and forwards as he drives along, learning about his childhood and dreams of the future as a young man.
It's interesting to be inside the head of a white middle-aged male, as it seems lately they're generally tarnished with the same brush, and tend to be overlooked in comparison to others in regards to their own fears about ageing and wondering if they can still be loved or feel something toward others.
”Nobody tells you what an intense experience loneliness is, how it has a lot of variations."
I was surprised to enjoy it as much as I did, and for this Booker read it was a story I got more into as the book progressed.
I'm not sure what the criteria is for a book to be longlisted for the Booker Prize? This seems to maybe be an unusual choice to be included. Though perhaps for the very fact of its ordinariness - being simply about the grind of life - that it was nominated.
3.5 ⭐️ I’d consider reading more of his books if I stumbled upon them.
Book 7 of my Booker Prize longlist odyssey. That's as much as I could fit in before the shortlist is announced shortly.
Postscript! Wednesday 24.Sept.25
Now shortlisted for the Booker Prize 2025. Which I'm more than a little perplexed by. While I enjoyed this, I don’t know what the criteria was for it to move to the shortlist, while other books which I felt had more to offer were left behind.
”I'm just a middle-aged guy, getting older.”
Tom Leyward doesn't recognise the face that peers at him from the bathroom mirror in the morning. Puffy, with eyes leaking water, which take hours to settle. When he gets up too quickly he gets head spins. His body doesn't correlate with how he feels in his mind. It's all gone by too fast.
After dropping his daughter off to start college, on a whim Tom starts his own road trip. Reminiscing over the past, and trying to figure out the present. His marriage to his wife Amy is hanging by a thread, and he's unsure if he's really left her or not.
”These things happen-families end up a certain way.”
Visiting old friends, colleagues, his estranged younger brother and girlfriend from his college days, Tom is trying to figure it all out.
We go backwards and forwards as he drives along, learning about his childhood and dreams of the future as a young man.
It's interesting to be inside the head of a white middle-aged male, as it seems lately they're generally tarnished with the same brush, and tend to be overlooked in comparison to others in regards to their own fears about ageing and wondering if they can still be loved or feel something toward others.
”Nobody tells you what an intense experience loneliness is, how it has a lot of variations."
I was surprised to enjoy it as much as I did, and for this Booker read it was a story I got more into as the book progressed.
I'm not sure what the criteria is for a book to be longlisted for the Booker Prize? This seems to maybe be an unusual choice to be included. Though perhaps for the very fact of its ordinariness - being simply about the grind of life - that it was nominated.
3.5 ⭐️ I’d consider reading more of his books if I stumbled upon them.
Book 7 of my Booker Prize longlist odyssey. That's as much as I could fit in before the shortlist is announced shortly.
Postscript! Wednesday 24.Sept.25
Now shortlisted for the Booker Prize 2025. Which I'm more than a little perplexed by. While I enjoyed this, I don’t know what the criteria was for it to move to the shortlist, while other books which I felt had more to offer were left behind.
August 19, 2025
Try as I might, I cannot see what is interesting, or entertaining about this sort of contemporary American writing.
But I was persuaded to read it, my first Markovits, on it making the Booker Longlist; surely, I thought, this must have some appeal. But I’ve done that before, tried to broaden my horizon with such contemporary American novels, get away from what I usually read, and find out why other people, notably here, the judges, think so highly of it.
It wasn’t just that I found the characters dull and couldn’t give a tinker’s cuss about what they got up to, but also I found it almost offensive at times in the language used.
The only positive I can find is that it was, mercifully, quite short.
But I was persuaded to read it, my first Markovits, on it making the Booker Longlist; surely, I thought, this must have some appeal. But I’ve done that before, tried to broaden my horizon with such contemporary American novels, get away from what I usually read, and find out why other people, notably here, the judges, think so highly of it.
It wasn’t just that I found the characters dull and couldn’t give a tinker’s cuss about what they got up to, but also I found it almost offensive at times in the language used.
The only positive I can find is that it was, mercifully, quite short.
October 8, 2025
I think it is a (underappreciated and misunderstood) sensitive, deep look into the human soul, with empathy and compassion for our flawed and changing nature.
I can't believe people complain about "all the basketball references" (really, like 4 or 5 paragraphs 🙄) and miss all the clarity with which he depicts complicated feelings. I loved it and I think he fully deserves to be on The Booker short list and I do intend to read more of his work.
I can't believe people complain about "all the basketball references" (really, like 4 or 5 paragraphs 🙄) and miss all the clarity with which he depicts complicated feelings. I loved it and I think he fully deserves to be on The Booker short list and I do intend to read more of his work.
August 14, 2025
2.5 stars
September 8, 2025
Stopped at 54%
July 31, 2025
a review in the guardian billed this as ‘a male counterpart to all fours’, a book i didn’t really like much, so it was up in the air as to whether i’d like this.
the rest of our lives follows tom, a middle aged professor, who, after his wife’s affair, resolves to leave her once their youngest daughter turns eighteen. 12 years later, when that day arrives, tom drops his daughter off at college and then keeps driving, dropping in on various people from his past.
it was a quick read with easy, stream of consciousness writing, but the interesting premise sadly never lives up to its potential and ultimately makes for quite a dull book.
it offers up a lot of themes that could be explored well - ageing, marriage, midlife, identity, empty nest syndrome etc - but it never lets itself dig deep enough and therefore the book doesn’t have much emotional weight. the ending just fizzles out in quite an unsatisfying way, and dare i say the ending was a little corny too.
2.75
the rest of our lives follows tom, a middle aged professor, who, after his wife’s affair, resolves to leave her once their youngest daughter turns eighteen. 12 years later, when that day arrives, tom drops his daughter off at college and then keeps driving, dropping in on various people from his past.
it was a quick read with easy, stream of consciousness writing, but the interesting premise sadly never lives up to its potential and ultimately makes for quite a dull book.
it offers up a lot of themes that could be explored well - ageing, marriage, midlife, identity, empty nest syndrome etc - but it never lets itself dig deep enough and therefore the book doesn’t have much emotional weight. the ending just fizzles out in quite an unsatisfying way, and dare i say the ending was a little corny too.
2.75
September 29, 2025
El protagonista repasa distintos momentos de su vida, se encuentra con personas de su pasado, intenta retomar antiguos proyectos, permitiéndose quizás esta pausa como un momento de chequeo personal, de entender las decisiones que lo llevaron a su yo del presente, los momentos que lo definen, mientras recibe mensajes de su propio cuerpo, y es que en esta introspección más psicológica ha dejado en segundo plano señales de su salud que se vuelven cada vez más urgentes.
Me pareció muy ágil de leer, fue como subirse al auto con el protagonista y sentarse a escuchar su historia mientras van cambiando los paisajes en el camino. Un roadtrip muy interesante sobre envejecer, sobre las decisiones que vamos tomando, las huellas de la infancia, los amores de la juventud, y las complejidades y desafíos de la adultez.
Actualmente esta novela forma parte de las nominadas a la shortlist para el Booker Prize 2025.
Me pareció muy ágil de leer, fue como subirse al auto con el protagonista y sentarse a escuchar su historia mientras van cambiando los paisajes en el camino. Un roadtrip muy interesante sobre envejecer, sobre las decisiones que vamos tomando, las huellas de la infancia, los amores de la juventud, y las complejidades y desafíos de la adultez.
Actualmente esta novela forma parte de las nominadas a la shortlist para el Booker Prize 2025.
March 25, 2025
I'm definitely showing my age when I say that I'm really enjoying midlife slice of life novels at the moment. This new novel from British-American writer Benjamin Markovits explores empty nest syndrome and a midlife road trip and asks the question - what is left when your kids leave home for college?
Tom is a law professor and father of two, married to Amy. Amy had an affair a decade ago and Tom promised himself that once their youngest child Miriam left for college, he'd leave his wife. That time has arrived and as Tom sets off to settle Miriam into college, he embarks on a road trip, not fully knowing where it is going to take him.
This is one of those books where the characters are sharply drawn and where, though not a huge amount happens, it gets under your skin. Tom isn't always a particularly nice person, nor is his brittle wife, but their redeeming characteristics bubble beneath the surface and we slowly find out what has brought them to this point and where they go from here. Examining midlife, mortality and marriage, The Rest of Our Lives asks the hard questions, to which there are no easy answers.
There's a fair bit of basketball chat in here in case that is off-putting to anyone, don't say you weren't warned! If you enjoy this, I think you'll also enjoy This Is Who We Are Now by James Bailey and Coming Home by Tom Lamont, both of which are refreshing reads that portray masculinity with nuance and empathy. 4/5 stars
Many thanks to Faber Books for the advance copy via @netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
Tom is a law professor and father of two, married to Amy. Amy had an affair a decade ago and Tom promised himself that once their youngest child Miriam left for college, he'd leave his wife. That time has arrived and as Tom sets off to settle Miriam into college, he embarks on a road trip, not fully knowing where it is going to take him.
This is one of those books where the characters are sharply drawn and where, though not a huge amount happens, it gets under your skin. Tom isn't always a particularly nice person, nor is his brittle wife, but their redeeming characteristics bubble beneath the surface and we slowly find out what has brought them to this point and where they go from here. Examining midlife, mortality and marriage, The Rest of Our Lives asks the hard questions, to which there are no easy answers.
There's a fair bit of basketball chat in here in case that is off-putting to anyone, don't say you weren't warned! If you enjoy this, I think you'll also enjoy This Is Who We Are Now by James Bailey and Coming Home by Tom Lamont, both of which are refreshing reads that portray masculinity with nuance and empathy. 4/5 stars
Many thanks to Faber Books for the advance copy via @netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
unfinished
October 10, 2025THIS is one of the six best books of the past year!? I thought I'd try Markovits again after the lacklustre A Weekend in New York but I barely made it past page 10. What a boring voice!
August 27, 2025
Tom Layward is a 55-year-old law professor who decided twelve years ago that he would leave his marriage to Amy (due to her infidelity) once their youngest child, Miriam, turned eighteen. After dropping Miriam off at college, instead of heading home, Tom keeps driving with only a vague idea of his destination. He ends up visiting several people from his past. Tom is taking forced leave due to complaints that have arisen from his course on hate crime. He is also dealing with health issues. This “road trip” novel relates a man’s midlife crisis and the complexities of his long-term marriage.
It is written in first person by Tom as he tries to find himself. It is structured in three parts. The first two-thirds are bland (bordering on boring) and appear to be there only to set up the final third. There are many ancillary characters that remain under-developed and add very little. It briefly touches on a currently relevant topic but never explores it in any depth. It is written in an informal colloquial manner and filled with references to product brand names. These types of books about a man’s existential crisis can be hit or miss with me, and this one is more of a miss.
It is written in first person by Tom as he tries to find himself. It is structured in three parts. The first two-thirds are bland (bordering on boring) and appear to be there only to set up the final third. There are many ancillary characters that remain under-developed and add very little. It briefly touches on a currently relevant topic but never explores it in any depth. It is written in an informal colloquial manner and filled with references to product brand names. These types of books about a man’s existential crisis can be hit or miss with me, and this one is more of a miss.
Read
November 7, 2025thank you simon & schuster and netgalley for the digital arc!! sorry for what i'm about to say!!
booker prize committee, when i catch you...you can't keep doing this to me!!!
the rest of our lives follows tom, a father tasked with dropping his daughter off at college. we learn that tom's wife alice had an affair 12 years ago, and tom essentially decided that he would wait to leave her until their children had grown up. now faced with that reality amidst career and health difficulties of his own, tom is at a crossroads. so he just keeps driving.
on paper, this book *should* work for me. tom is a law professor, i'm a recent law school graduate. tom is basketball fan who gives legal advice to an nba team owner, i'm a fervent nba enthusiast. and tom is dropping his daughter off at university in pittsburgh, and i literally went to school in pittsburgh and have lived there for years. look at all these connections that should inspire some sort of fondness or excitement or interest!!
however, this book has also been dubbed the male version of all fours by miranda july, a book i hated. so...my expectations were cautiously low.
and unfortunately, i was right to have placed them there. i almost feel like it is a disservice to compare this novel to all fours, not because i enjoyed that book, but because it makes it seem that this novel has anything going on at all. while yes, both novels are about parents going on road trips and embarking on journeys of self-discovery, those connections are too loose to inspire any real comparison in my eyes. while i found all fours remarkably odd and off-putting for its strange character choices and random plot points, the rest of our lives lacks anything interesting at all.
truthfully, i spent most of this book just waiting for something, anything to happen. like the main character in the fellow booker shortlisted title flesh, tom is a character that just sort of lets life happen to him without exhibiting any real agency. and i didn't like flesh, so it's no surprise that i didn't like this book either.
the first third or so of the novel, we learn about tom and alice and their kids and alice's affair. and essentially, everybody sucks. i didn't feel connected to any of the characters, i did not feel bad for any of them. i was mostly just interested in the drive from new york to pittsburgh where tom drops off his daughter miri at cmu, and this was because i need benjamin markovits to include a map of the route these characters took.
(indulge me in pittsburgh geography talk for a minute, simply because it has been driving me nuts for the entire month it took me to finish this book.) they're driving from new york to pittsburgh, right? ok fine, lots of possible routes, i guess. however, he specifically name drops delmont and murrysville, which are east of pittsburgh. and then they are in downtown pittsburgh, and then they are unpacking at the cmu dorms. so there are two possibilities here: either he is implying that cmu is in downtown pittsburgh, which it is not, it's in oakland. OR he is saying they drove through delmont and murrysville AND downtown pittsburgh before reaching cmu, which makes no sense because oakland is between murrysville and downtown pittsburgh. you wouldn't have to go downtown at all because you would get to oakland first. it doesn't make any sense.
so you're probably thinking, claire, who gives a shit? and the answer is me. because why include those details if they are wrong (please editors, someone change this before publication lmao there is still time!!), or why include them at all? and also, this is the most i cared about anything in this entire book LMAO the only emotion this book was able to get from me was concern about the geographic route they drove from new york to pittsburgh. that's it. nothing else interested me, which is probably why it took me a literal month to get through.
otherwise, this book proposes a lot of questions about what it means to be a middle-aged white man in modern society, which is already a topic i don't really care to read about, but this book fails because it doesn't actually have anything new or interesting to say about these questions. it might be poking fun at those people, or it might be empathizing with them, or maybe it is just simply acknowledging that these types of people exist. regardless, the delivery of such information was not inspired or innovative or, to be blunt, worthy of anyone's time. weirdly, i was reminded of rachel cusk at times, if rachel cusk's writing was stripped of all whimsy and nuance.
so tldr, skip it lol
booker prize committee, when i catch you...you can't keep doing this to me!!!
the rest of our lives follows tom, a father tasked with dropping his daughter off at college. we learn that tom's wife alice had an affair 12 years ago, and tom essentially decided that he would wait to leave her until their children had grown up. now faced with that reality amidst career and health difficulties of his own, tom is at a crossroads. so he just keeps driving.
on paper, this book *should* work for me. tom is a law professor, i'm a recent law school graduate. tom is basketball fan who gives legal advice to an nba team owner, i'm a fervent nba enthusiast. and tom is dropping his daughter off at university in pittsburgh, and i literally went to school in pittsburgh and have lived there for years. look at all these connections that should inspire some sort of fondness or excitement or interest!!
however, this book has also been dubbed the male version of all fours by miranda july, a book i hated. so...my expectations were cautiously low.
and unfortunately, i was right to have placed them there. i almost feel like it is a disservice to compare this novel to all fours, not because i enjoyed that book, but because it makes it seem that this novel has anything going on at all. while yes, both novels are about parents going on road trips and embarking on journeys of self-discovery, those connections are too loose to inspire any real comparison in my eyes. while i found all fours remarkably odd and off-putting for its strange character choices and random plot points, the rest of our lives lacks anything interesting at all.
truthfully, i spent most of this book just waiting for something, anything to happen. like the main character in the fellow booker shortlisted title flesh, tom is a character that just sort of lets life happen to him without exhibiting any real agency. and i didn't like flesh, so it's no surprise that i didn't like this book either.
the first third or so of the novel, we learn about tom and alice and their kids and alice's affair. and essentially, everybody sucks. i didn't feel connected to any of the characters, i did not feel bad for any of them. i was mostly just interested in the drive from new york to pittsburgh where tom drops off his daughter miri at cmu, and this was because i need benjamin markovits to include a map of the route these characters took.
(indulge me in pittsburgh geography talk for a minute, simply because it has been driving me nuts for the entire month it took me to finish this book.) they're driving from new york to pittsburgh, right? ok fine, lots of possible routes, i guess. however, he specifically name drops delmont and murrysville, which are east of pittsburgh. and then they are in downtown pittsburgh, and then they are unpacking at the cmu dorms. so there are two possibilities here: either he is implying that cmu is in downtown pittsburgh, which it is not, it's in oakland. OR he is saying they drove through delmont and murrysville AND downtown pittsburgh before reaching cmu, which makes no sense because oakland is between murrysville and downtown pittsburgh. you wouldn't have to go downtown at all because you would get to oakland first. it doesn't make any sense.
so you're probably thinking, claire, who gives a shit? and the answer is me. because why include those details if they are wrong (please editors, someone change this before publication lmao there is still time!!), or why include them at all? and also, this is the most i cared about anything in this entire book LMAO the only emotion this book was able to get from me was concern about the geographic route they drove from new york to pittsburgh. that's it. nothing else interested me, which is probably why it took me a literal month to get through.
otherwise, this book proposes a lot of questions about what it means to be a middle-aged white man in modern society, which is already a topic i don't really care to read about, but this book fails because it doesn't actually have anything new or interesting to say about these questions. it might be poking fun at those people, or it might be empathizing with them, or maybe it is just simply acknowledging that these types of people exist. regardless, the delivery of such information was not inspired or innovative or, to be blunt, worthy of anyone's time. weirdly, i was reminded of rachel cusk at times, if rachel cusk's writing was stripped of all whimsy and nuance.
so tldr, skip it lol
October 22, 2025
My expectations before reading this were quite low as none of my Goodreads friends seemed to like it much. But since it’s shortlisted for the Booker, and as I often like books about people who are at a changing point in their life, I at least wanted to give it a try. I liked the meandering style, and got drawn in by Tom’s thoughts, doubts and feelings about his life, marriage, family, friends etc. I did rather enjoy reading this, but I don’t think it should win the Booker Prize. (Kitamura is still by far my favourite).
Thank you Simon & Schuster US and Edelweiss for the ARC.
Thank you Simon & Schuster US and Edelweiss for the ARC.
August 17, 2025
Heralded as the male "On All Fours" and teased as relying heavily on pick-up basketball for its storytelling, The Rest of Our Lives sank right to the bottom of my Booker Prize reading list: Neither of these things appeals to me. Luckily, however, these things also do not relate to the novel I just read. Yes, there is a midlife crisis and a road trip, and yes, sometimes we spent roughly six lines on him playing basketball, but the weight of the narrative lies elsewhere.
The man (Tom) whom we follow on his road trip (and midlife crisis) begins by taking his daughter to college. He is a little old-fashioned, both in the seminars he teaches on hate crimes and in his judgement of sexual misconduct in the NBA. His children tell him he is on the wrong side of history, but his behaviour is far from egregious. However, he has a decision to make: Years ago, his wife had an affair, and now that his last child is leaving home, he must decide whether the marriage is over. Rather than returning home after dropping his daughter off at college, he moves on, visiting people from his past and perhaps working on a book about pick-up basketball encounters. His body is not quite cooperating — he suspects he has long Covid — but he travells from place to place and reflects on his relationship, his family and his friends.
The selling point of this novel is its narrative tone, a disarming first-person narrative. We are inside the mind of a middle-aged man who encounters a world that is no longer always made for him and a reality that he does not always want to accept. Yet while he is far from perfect and is often stuck in his prejudices, he is not a villainous old white man. Instead, we gain insight into male friendships and the dynamics of masculinity. We explore male-dominated spaces as we get to know this character, learning about his past and present, and the possibilities of his future.
There is a lot of literary real estate when it comes to the relationship dynamics of middle-aged couples, but Markovits excels in staying with his protagonist and letting us see for ourselves. Nothing is easy, black-and-white or one-sided. Making us understand the intricacies of the presented relationships and understanding the validity of different perspectives while keeping us glued to Tom is an impressive feat.
A recurring theme in this is social roles, performance and expectation. Tom himself reflects on his desire to talk to his wife:"If you call Amy now the person you talk to will not be the person in your head, for whom you have these warm and simple feelings. It will be another person, who doesn’t like you much these days, with whom you get into stupid arguments.” And yet, there is no question that there is a great deal of love and understanding present. We get to know Tom and, perhaps against our will, begin to see — and perhaps even like — him for who he is.
I thought this was an unassuming but successful contender for the Booker Prize, and I would not be unhappy to see it on the shortlist. It is easy to read, very entertaining and manages to show the ridiculousness of Toms behaviour without making him the but of the joke - and it manages to explore its themes without becoming high brow or overly conceptual.
The man (Tom) whom we follow on his road trip (and midlife crisis) begins by taking his daughter to college. He is a little old-fashioned, both in the seminars he teaches on hate crimes and in his judgement of sexual misconduct in the NBA. His children tell him he is on the wrong side of history, but his behaviour is far from egregious. However, he has a decision to make: Years ago, his wife had an affair, and now that his last child is leaving home, he must decide whether the marriage is over. Rather than returning home after dropping his daughter off at college, he moves on, visiting people from his past and perhaps working on a book about pick-up basketball encounters. His body is not quite cooperating — he suspects he has long Covid — but he travells from place to place and reflects on his relationship, his family and his friends.
The selling point of this novel is its narrative tone, a disarming first-person narrative. We are inside the mind of a middle-aged man who encounters a world that is no longer always made for him and a reality that he does not always want to accept. Yet while he is far from perfect and is often stuck in his prejudices, he is not a villainous old white man. Instead, we gain insight into male friendships and the dynamics of masculinity. We explore male-dominated spaces as we get to know this character, learning about his past and present, and the possibilities of his future.
There is a lot of literary real estate when it comes to the relationship dynamics of middle-aged couples, but Markovits excels in staying with his protagonist and letting us see for ourselves. Nothing is easy, black-and-white or one-sided. Making us understand the intricacies of the presented relationships and understanding the validity of different perspectives while keeping us glued to Tom is an impressive feat.
A recurring theme in this is social roles, performance and expectation. Tom himself reflects on his desire to talk to his wife:"If you call Amy now the person you talk to will not be the person in your head, for whom you have these warm and simple feelings. It will be another person, who doesn’t like you much these days, with whom you get into stupid arguments.” And yet, there is no question that there is a great deal of love and understanding present. We get to know Tom and, perhaps against our will, begin to see — and perhaps even like — him for who he is.
I thought this was an unassuming but successful contender for the Booker Prize, and I would not be unhappy to see it on the shortlist. It is easy to read, very entertaining and manages to show the ridiculousness of Toms behaviour without making him the but of the joke - and it manages to explore its themes without becoming high brow or overly conceptual.
October 13, 2024
This is a new author for me, but the book sounding very appealing in its description and the cover made me curious.
The story follows Tom, his wife and their children and covers some very heavy subjects, including affairs, health, friendships, aspirations, grown up children, mental health-at times it goes pretty deep. You realise pretty much straight away that the story is being narrated by Tom, so you get all of his thoughts first hand. I personally enjoyed this as I felt it made for a deeper insight into him as a character. It allowed you to feel exactly what he was feeling and at times I questioned in my own head whether or not I would respond in the same way.
I'm not sure if you would call Tom and his wife Amy a middle aged couple, however they do have a grown up son and a daughter who is heading off to college. As a family and as a couple they have been through their fair share of life in general. You learn pretty quickly that Tom may have a significant health issue. Although this is mentioned throughout the story, the author has cleverly taken its focus completely away from the rest of the story. At times I completely forgot about it as I was so absorbed in finding out where the whole story was going next.
Emotionally, I found myself very invested in this book. Towards the last few chapters I was worried about Tom, even trying to diagnose him.
This is a well written book with lots of detail. It's an easy read with a story that builds with believable characters and life experiences. It genuinely left me wanting to know what's next for Tom and his family.
The story follows Tom, his wife and their children and covers some very heavy subjects, including affairs, health, friendships, aspirations, grown up children, mental health-at times it goes pretty deep. You realise pretty much straight away that the story is being narrated by Tom, so you get all of his thoughts first hand. I personally enjoyed this as I felt it made for a deeper insight into him as a character. It allowed you to feel exactly what he was feeling and at times I questioned in my own head whether or not I would respond in the same way.
I'm not sure if you would call Tom and his wife Amy a middle aged couple, however they do have a grown up son and a daughter who is heading off to college. As a family and as a couple they have been through their fair share of life in general. You learn pretty quickly that Tom may have a significant health issue. Although this is mentioned throughout the story, the author has cleverly taken its focus completely away from the rest of the story. At times I completely forgot about it as I was so absorbed in finding out where the whole story was going next.
Emotionally, I found myself very invested in this book. Towards the last few chapters I was worried about Tom, even trying to diagnose him.
This is a well written book with lots of detail. It's an easy read with a story that builds with believable characters and life experiences. It genuinely left me wanting to know what's next for Tom and his family.
April 10, 2025
A middle-aged man discovers that his wife has an affair. Although their marriage has been in trouble for quite some time, he decides to do nothing until all his kids leave home for college. Finally, the day came.
This could have been such an emotional, reflective story about broken love, broken hopes, and shattered lives. The empty nest syndrome, combined with betrayal and devastating loneliness, sounds like a perfect recipe for a bestseller. Unfortunately, what we have here is a mess. Thoughts, memories, and countless unimportant dialogues made me lose interest at the beginning of the book. I decided to keep going, hoping that the book would pick up. DNF at 45%.
This could have been such an emotional, reflective story about broken love, broken hopes, and shattered lives. The empty nest syndrome, combined with betrayal and devastating loneliness, sounds like a perfect recipe for a bestseller. Unfortunately, what we have here is a mess. Thoughts, memories, and countless unimportant dialogues made me lose interest at the beginning of the book. I decided to keep going, hoping that the book would pick up. DNF at 45%.
August 7, 2025
A fascinating commentary on the pipeline of lonely middle-aged white man to normalised racism/sexism/homophobia/transphobia. The sense of pitiful resignation that leads someone to being so benign in their own life.
December 8, 2025
The Rest of Our Lives follows Tom, a middle-aged man who drops his daughter off at college and simply… doesn’t go home. Instead of returning to his wife, he drifts across the country, visiting old friends and acquaintances, circling around his past and his regrets. On paper, it’s a classic midlife road-trip setup, but the way the story is told feels just as wandering as Tom’s journey.
For me, the book often felt like it was meandering right along with him. The narrative slips from one visit and memory to another, and at times I found it genuinely difficult to follow where we were in his timeline or even what the emotional throughline was supposed to be. The plot isn’t really “plotty”; it’s more like being inside Tom’s head as he circles around his marriage, his choices, and the life he’s built (and maybe wants to escape).
One thing that did help me make sense of the book is the idea that Tom may be dealing with undiagnosed medical issues that affect his state of mind. There are hints of physical symptoms and an overall fogginess to the way he processes events. Reading it that way, the confusion and lack of structure almost become part of the point—Tom doesn’t fully understand what’s going on with his own body or his future, and the book’s hazy, drifting style reflects that.
That said, even if that’s intentional, it still made the experience of reading it a bit frustrating at times. I had trouble staying grounded in the story and emotionally connected to Tom because I kept losing the thread of where we were and why certain scenes mattered. There are thoughtful observations about aging, marriage, and disappointment scattered throughout, and I can see this really working for readers who enjoy very interior, character-driven novels where voice and mood matter more than clear momentum.
Overall, I’d say this is a thoughtful, introspective road-trip novel that leans heavily into its main character’s muddled inner life. For me, the meandering structure and difficulty in following Tom’s journey kept it from fully landing, but readers who don’t mind a more diffuse, wandering style may get more out of it.
Thank you to NetGalley and Simon & Schuster | S&S/Summit Books for the advance copy.
For me, the book often felt like it was meandering right along with him. The narrative slips from one visit and memory to another, and at times I found it genuinely difficult to follow where we were in his timeline or even what the emotional throughline was supposed to be. The plot isn’t really “plotty”; it’s more like being inside Tom’s head as he circles around his marriage, his choices, and the life he’s built (and maybe wants to escape).
One thing that did help me make sense of the book is the idea that Tom may be dealing with undiagnosed medical issues that affect his state of mind. There are hints of physical symptoms and an overall fogginess to the way he processes events. Reading it that way, the confusion and lack of structure almost become part of the point—Tom doesn’t fully understand what’s going on with his own body or his future, and the book’s hazy, drifting style reflects that.
That said, even if that’s intentional, it still made the experience of reading it a bit frustrating at times. I had trouble staying grounded in the story and emotionally connected to Tom because I kept losing the thread of where we were and why certain scenes mattered. There are thoughtful observations about aging, marriage, and disappointment scattered throughout, and I can see this really working for readers who enjoy very interior, character-driven novels where voice and mood matter more than clear momentum.
Overall, I’d say this is a thoughtful, introspective road-trip novel that leans heavily into its main character’s muddled inner life. For me, the meandering structure and difficulty in following Tom’s journey kept it from fully landing, but readers who don’t mind a more diffuse, wandering style may get more out of it.
Thank you to NetGalley and Simon & Schuster | S&S/Summit Books for the advance copy.
August 9, 2025
A potentially promising plot for this Booker longlister but for me it plays it too safe, which ultimately puts it on the boring and forgettable side.
Tom Layward, a married father of two in his fifties, drives his youngest child to college and then just keeps on going, off on a cross country road trip. He may be leaving his wife, he’s not sure. Something like this had long been expected, we’re told, as after his wife had an affair twelve years ago he’d planned to wait to leave the marriage until the kids left home.
Establishing his wife’s affair at the open immediately puts the reader on Tom’s side and establishes a conventional reason for his actions. We can sympathize with Tom, whereas it would have been more challenging if he’d simply been fleeing an unsatisfactory marriage. Markovits himself offers a hint of this more interesting novel that was not to be when he writes,
But dissatisfaction with a version of that particular description of marriage was not sufficient for the novel he ended up writing, which makes Tom less interesting than he could have been.
Markovits also plays it very safe, given the audience for literary fiction, in his handling of the “anti-woke” backlash currently topical. Along his journey, Tom meets with a young white basketball player who is trying to make it into the NBA and who wants to sue the league for anti-white discrimination, given that the majority of players on rosters are African-American. This is pretty ridiculous obviously, and the character in general is clearly drawn to be. Is this character interesting? No. Could you write a character to represent the “anti-woke” ideology who is not easily dismissible? Come on, try.
Playing it safe in these and other ways, in addition to its unremarkable prose, make this a disappointment as an example of one of the best pieces of fiction of the year.
Tom Layward, a married father of two in his fifties, drives his youngest child to college and then just keeps on going, off on a cross country road trip. He may be leaving his wife, he’s not sure. Something like this had long been expected, we’re told, as after his wife had an affair twelve years ago he’d planned to wait to leave the marriage until the kids left home.
Establishing his wife’s affair at the open immediately puts the reader on Tom’s side and establishes a conventional reason for his actions. We can sympathize with Tom, whereas it would have been more challenging if he’d simply been fleeing an unsatisfactory marriage. Markovits himself offers a hint of this more interesting novel that was not to be when he writes,
You fall in love with somebody when you’re 26, and you see them in all kinds of different lights and according to their potential, but after years and years of marriage and shared parenting and all the other shared decisions you have to make just to get through the days, you accumulate a lot of data about that person that after a while just seems more or less accurate. If you continue to have illusions, that’s your fault. So if you stay married it’s because you’ve accepted that this is what they’re like, and what your life with them is like, and you stop expecting them to do or give you things you know perfectly well they’re unlikely to do or give you.
But dissatisfaction with a version of that particular description of marriage was not sufficient for the novel he ended up writing, which makes Tom less interesting than he could have been.
Markovits also plays it very safe, given the audience for literary fiction, in his handling of the “anti-woke” backlash currently topical. Along his journey, Tom meets with a young white basketball player who is trying to make it into the NBA and who wants to sue the league for anti-white discrimination, given that the majority of players on rosters are African-American. This is pretty ridiculous obviously, and the character in general is clearly drawn to be. Is this character interesting? No. Could you write a character to represent the “anti-woke” ideology who is not easily dismissible? Come on, try.
Playing it safe in these and other ways, in addition to its unremarkable prose, make this a disappointment as an example of one of the best pieces of fiction of the year.
September 14, 2025
Well, this didn’t feel very Booker-ish (despite being long listed), but I liked this very realistic story of a marriage on the rocks. It’s very very “of the moment” in the sense that many of the telling details grounds the story firmly 2020’s. Something about the interactions and reactions between the four family members, Tom, Amy and their two children, seemed so believable to me. My one quibble is there’s a number of ancillary characters whose purpose seems only to reflect the protagonist in a mirror for the readers to see. This is the story of one man. A deep character dive. I can see why for some readers that might not be enough to be a prize winner.
Reminded me a lot of Tom Wolfe's work.
Reminded me a lot of Tom Wolfe's work.
August 31, 2025
Well we have ourselves a cuckoo in the nest for I don’t know why on earth this is on the Booker Longlist. Angry white man having himself a wee mid life crisis, whinges for 200 odd pages in a stream of consciousness sort of a narrative, and goes on a small road trip that had as much point as the book. In that it had none. I have little nice to say. The font is alright.
I also don’t know why it was necessary to know everyones height, there’s a fair bit of oh she’s gained a few pounds and it’s just incredibly meh. Basically Tom’s wife Amy cheated on him a number of years ago and they stayed together but the intention was that he might, maybe, possibly leave her once their youngest daughter goes off to college. Miri goes off to college and Tom after her driving her to her new dorm takes an impromptu road trip across some of America for a few days. He meets up with people from his past and there’s a theme of all their lives not quite living up too expectation and rather them having to compromise or settle to an extent. This maybe helps Tom reframe the life he had with Amy and that actually it was decent enough, but also he seems to think the world owes him something and to be honest he can just fuck right off. Pretty much everyone is rich and the privilege be hanging out of them and yet somehow chips on shoulders about how hard they all have things. There’s an underlying health condition in which he often wakes up with a swollen face and leaky eyes and to be honest I was just hoping he’d keel over dead so I wouldn’t need to read anymore. Very no. And yet wouldn’t be in the least surprised if it ends up on the shortlist. 1/5
I also don’t know why it was necessary to know everyones height, there’s a fair bit of oh she’s gained a few pounds and it’s just incredibly meh. Basically Tom’s wife Amy cheated on him a number of years ago and they stayed together but the intention was that he might, maybe, possibly leave her once their youngest daughter goes off to college. Miri goes off to college and Tom after her driving her to her new dorm takes an impromptu road trip across some of America for a few days. He meets up with people from his past and there’s a theme of all their lives not quite living up too expectation and rather them having to compromise or settle to an extent. This maybe helps Tom reframe the life he had with Amy and that actually it was decent enough, but also he seems to think the world owes him something and to be honest he can just fuck right off. Pretty much everyone is rich and the privilege be hanging out of them and yet somehow chips on shoulders about how hard they all have things. There’s an underlying health condition in which he often wakes up with a swollen face and leaky eyes and to be honest I was just hoping he’d keel over dead so I wouldn’t need to read anymore. Very no. And yet wouldn’t be in the least surprised if it ends up on the shortlist. 1/5
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