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Digital Exhaustion: Simple Rules for Reclaiming Your Life
Brought to you by Penguin.
We all know the feeling of digital exhaustion.
The aimless scrolling, eyes glazing over at the screen. The feeling that no matter how many messages we respond to, how many posts we read, or how much data we sort through, we can never stay ahead of it.
Digital Exhaustion shows us how we can reimagine our relationship with our digital tools.
Digital transformation expert and Professor, Paul Leonardi, argues that our exhaustion comes from the “exhaustion triad;” that is, the way that our tools change how we pay attention, how we attribute behaviours and intentions to others, and how we experience our emotions.
By creating new habits around our use of technologies, we can set up boundaries so they stop depleting us so quickly. Follow these eight rules to regain control of your
Rule #1: Stop Using Half Your Tools.Rule #2: Make a Match.Rule #3: Batch and Stream.Rule #4: Wait. One Hour. One Day. One Week.Rule #5: Don’t Assume.Rule #6: Always Be Intentional.Rule #7: Learn to See Around Corners.Rule #8: Be Here, Not There.Discover the life-changing guide to using your digital devices in surprising new ways to help you beat exhaustion and find new sources of energy.
‘A practical game plan for pushing back. It's time to reclaim our lives!’ Cal Newport, bestselling author of Slow Productivity and Deep Work
© Paul Leonardi 2025 (P) Penguin Audio 2025
We all know the feeling of digital exhaustion.
The aimless scrolling, eyes glazing over at the screen. The feeling that no matter how many messages we respond to, how many posts we read, or how much data we sort through, we can never stay ahead of it.
Digital Exhaustion shows us how we can reimagine our relationship with our digital tools.
Digital transformation expert and Professor, Paul Leonardi, argues that our exhaustion comes from the “exhaustion triad;” that is, the way that our tools change how we pay attention, how we attribute behaviours and intentions to others, and how we experience our emotions.
By creating new habits around our use of technologies, we can set up boundaries so they stop depleting us so quickly. Follow these eight rules to regain control of your
Rule #1: Stop Using Half Your Tools.Rule #2: Make a Match.Rule #3: Batch and Stream.Rule #4: Wait. One Hour. One Day. One Week.Rule #5: Don’t Assume.Rule #6: Always Be Intentional.Rule #7: Learn to See Around Corners.Rule #8: Be Here, Not There.Discover the life-changing guide to using your digital devices in surprising new ways to help you beat exhaustion and find new sources of energy.
‘A practical game plan for pushing back. It's time to reclaim our lives!’ Cal Newport, bestselling author of Slow Productivity and Deep Work
© Paul Leonardi 2025 (P) Penguin Audio 2025
Audible Audio
Published October 9, 2025
About the author
Paul Leonardi
8 books6 followersPaul Leonardi is a leading expert in digital transformation, the future of work, and social networks.
Paul’s insights come straight from the front lines. For 20+ years, Paul has advised Fortune 500 companies, startups, and nonprofits on how to build smarter communication, foster innovation, and manage the people side of new tech. Whether he’s coaching executives or speaking to thousands at a user conference, Paul brings clarity, energy, and a sense of humor to complex topics like AI, remote work, and digital fatigue.
Paul has turned his research into practical ideas that have shaped thinking in Harvard Business Review, MIT Sloan Management Review, The New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and (his personal favorite) Car & Driver. His award-winning book, The Digital Mindset (co-authored with Tsedal Neeley and published with Harvard Business Review Press), offers a playbook for professionals navigating a tech-driven economy.
His newest book Digital Exhaustion (Riverhead Press) helps people learn to re-orient to their technologies in ways that improve their capacity for collaboration, innovation, and happiness whether at work or in their everyday lives.
At UC Santa Barbara, Paul chairs the Department of Technology Management, where he holds the Duca Family Endowed Chair. He also founded the university’s Master of Technology Management program, a graduate degree designed to help professionals harness the power of new technologies to build better businesses, products, and services.
Paul earned his PhD from Stanford University, and worked previously as a faculty member at Northwestern University. He lives with his family in Santa Barbara, CA.
Paul’s insights come straight from the front lines. For 20+ years, Paul has advised Fortune 500 companies, startups, and nonprofits on how to build smarter communication, foster innovation, and manage the people side of new tech. Whether he’s coaching executives or speaking to thousands at a user conference, Paul brings clarity, energy, and a sense of humor to complex topics like AI, remote work, and digital fatigue.
Paul has turned his research into practical ideas that have shaped thinking in Harvard Business Review, MIT Sloan Management Review, The New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and (his personal favorite) Car & Driver. His award-winning book, The Digital Mindset (co-authored with Tsedal Neeley and published with Harvard Business Review Press), offers a playbook for professionals navigating a tech-driven economy.
His newest book Digital Exhaustion (Riverhead Press) helps people learn to re-orient to their technologies in ways that improve their capacity for collaboration, innovation, and happiness whether at work or in their everyday lives.
At UC Santa Barbara, Paul chairs the Department of Technology Management, where he holds the Duca Family Endowed Chair. He also founded the university’s Master of Technology Management program, a graduate degree designed to help professionals harness the power of new technologies to build better businesses, products, and services.
Paul earned his PhD from Stanford University, and worked previously as a faculty member at Northwestern University. He lives with his family in Santa Barbara, CA.
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Displaying 1 - 23 of 23 reviews
June 21, 2025
Book Review: Digital Exhaustion: Simple Rules for Reclaiming Your Life by Paul Leonardi
Rating: 4.5/5
Initial Impressions
Leonardi’s Digital Exhaustion is a timely antidote to the overwhelm of our hyperconnected era. Unlike typical digital detox guides, this book acknowledges the impossibility of disconnecting entirely—instead offering pragmatic strategies to reshape our relationship with technology. Blending behavioral science with relatable anecdotes, Leonardi dissects the exhaustion triad (cognitive, emotional, and relational drain) with clarity and compassion.
Emotional Resonance & Reactions
Reading this felt like a wake-up call. Leonardi’s analysis of how we reflexively check emails or doomscroll—often mistaking busyness for productivity—hit uncomfortably close to home. His solutions, however, sparked relief. The chapter on strategic delay (waiting to respond to messages) was revelatory, as was the insight that using fewer tools more intentionally can reduce fatigue. While some sections leaned heavily into corporate contexts, the universal applicability of his rules (e.g., right tool for the task) kept me engaged.
Strengths
-Realistic Solutions: Rejects unrealistic abstinence in favor of actionable tweaks (e.g., time-blocking notifications) that respect modern work demands.
-Research-Backed: Draws on studies about attention fragmentation and tech-induced anxiety without drowning readers in jargon.
-Holistic Approach: Addresses not just productivity but emotional well-being, like how performative responsiveness erodes self-worth.
Constructive Criticism
-Corporate Bias: Examples skew toward knowledge workers; more diversity in case studies (e.g., caregivers, creatives) would broaden appeal.
-Depth on Emotional Traps: While identified, some psychological patterns (e.g., FOMO) could benefit from deeper unpacking.
-Visual Aids: Infographics summarizing rules or self-assessment tools would enhance practicality.
Final Verdict
Digital Exhaustion is a lifeline for anyone drowning in pings and screens. Leonardi’s blend of empathy and evidence makes this more than a productivity manual—it’s a blueprint for preserving humanity in the digital age.
Thank you to the publisher and Edelweiss for the review copy.
Rating: 4.5/5 (A smart, compassionate guide to thriving—not just surviving—in our tech-saturated world.)
Rating: 4.5/5
Initial Impressions
Leonardi’s Digital Exhaustion is a timely antidote to the overwhelm of our hyperconnected era. Unlike typical digital detox guides, this book acknowledges the impossibility of disconnecting entirely—instead offering pragmatic strategies to reshape our relationship with technology. Blending behavioral science with relatable anecdotes, Leonardi dissects the exhaustion triad (cognitive, emotional, and relational drain) with clarity and compassion.
Emotional Resonance & Reactions
Reading this felt like a wake-up call. Leonardi’s analysis of how we reflexively check emails or doomscroll—often mistaking busyness for productivity—hit uncomfortably close to home. His solutions, however, sparked relief. The chapter on strategic delay (waiting to respond to messages) was revelatory, as was the insight that using fewer tools more intentionally can reduce fatigue. While some sections leaned heavily into corporate contexts, the universal applicability of his rules (e.g., right tool for the task) kept me engaged.
Strengths
-Realistic Solutions: Rejects unrealistic abstinence in favor of actionable tweaks (e.g., time-blocking notifications) that respect modern work demands.
-Research-Backed: Draws on studies about attention fragmentation and tech-induced anxiety without drowning readers in jargon.
-Holistic Approach: Addresses not just productivity but emotional well-being, like how performative responsiveness erodes self-worth.
Constructive Criticism
-Corporate Bias: Examples skew toward knowledge workers; more diversity in case studies (e.g., caregivers, creatives) would broaden appeal.
-Depth on Emotional Traps: While identified, some psychological patterns (e.g., FOMO) could benefit from deeper unpacking.
-Visual Aids: Infographics summarizing rules or self-assessment tools would enhance practicality.
Final Verdict
Digital Exhaustion is a lifeline for anyone drowning in pings and screens. Leonardi’s blend of empathy and evidence makes this more than a productivity manual—it’s a blueprint for preserving humanity in the digital age.
Thank you to the publisher and Edelweiss for the review copy.
Rating: 4.5/5 (A smart, compassionate guide to thriving—not just surviving—in our tech-saturated world.)
July 6, 2026
Aim for a meaningful cut, like half.
(what you gain is energy, focus, and control)
good notes:
- Consider how many digital tools you use in a single day, at work and at home. Your phone, laptop, TV, car interface… Then there are your apps: Slack, Zoom, Gmail, WhatsApp, Netflix, Alexa. The list gets long fast – and you might be surprised at how little of it you truly control. The first rule for easing digital exhaustion is simple in theory: use fewer tools.
- Use four steps to pare them down. First, list every tool you use and sort them into three buckets: work, home, or both. Home apps create as much digital clutter as work tools, and you usually have more control over them.
- Second, assess each tool on three criteria: substitutability (can something else do the same job? ), instrumentality (is it essential for a specific task? ), and network lock-in (are you using it only because everyone else does? ). Tools that fail those checks are prime cuts. Third, act where you actually have influence.
- you may not be able to drop a required company platform, but you can consolidate elsewhere – agree on one shared drive, or ask contractors to use the video service you already know well. Fourth, run an energy audit. Does the tool energize you or drain you? If it costs you more than it gives and you don’t truly need it, let it go. If it gives you a genuine boost, it may earn its place.
- A text can read as “I’m busy,” while a call can read as “I care. ” Even simple choices send signals. If your channel creates the wrong impression, adjust and clarify your intent.
- Think scheduling meetings, reviewing documents, and entering expenses. Instead of spacing them out across the day, stack them together into one uninterrupted block. Be sure to organize your work by the type of thinking it requires – reading, deciding, drafting – rather than by which app it’s in.
- What if you’d waited an hour and answered with clarity and purpose? Triage each message into three buckets – reply within an hour, a day, or a week – and route the nonurgent messages to your next batch block or stream slot.
- This is the cadence you want: slower, clearer replies at predictable times.
- Digital tools make the leap from data to story easy – sometimes too easy. (ASSUMPTIONS)
Notes:
- we often think of attention as passive, but staying focused takes real energy. Every time you switch tasks – from an article to a text to a notification – your brain has to reorient and burn extra fuel. The more you switch, the more drained you feel, even if you haven’t done anything physical. Phones make those jumps feel effortless, but the cost adds up quickly. Maybe you’re toggling between apps, hopping across platforms, or trying to finish a report while answering messages from your kid’s school.
- Screens act like both portals and mirrors, pulling you into guessing what others think while also reflecting you back at yourself. Even on video calls, part of your attention hovers over your own face, watching yourself perform. All that self-monitoring drains cognitive energy and adds an emotional load. Emotions play a huge role in burnout, and tech amplifies them by making you feel less in control.
obvs notes:
- digital exhaustion – your mental battery draining while your devices keep demanding attention.
(what you gain is energy, focus, and control)
good notes:
- Consider how many digital tools you use in a single day, at work and at home. Your phone, laptop, TV, car interface… Then there are your apps: Slack, Zoom, Gmail, WhatsApp, Netflix, Alexa. The list gets long fast – and you might be surprised at how little of it you truly control. The first rule for easing digital exhaustion is simple in theory: use fewer tools.
- Use four steps to pare them down. First, list every tool you use and sort them into three buckets: work, home, or both. Home apps create as much digital clutter as work tools, and you usually have more control over them.
- Second, assess each tool on three criteria: substitutability (can something else do the same job? ), instrumentality (is it essential for a specific task? ), and network lock-in (are you using it only because everyone else does? ). Tools that fail those checks are prime cuts. Third, act where you actually have influence.
- you may not be able to drop a required company platform, but you can consolidate elsewhere – agree on one shared drive, or ask contractors to use the video service you already know well. Fourth, run an energy audit. Does the tool energize you or drain you? If it costs you more than it gives and you don’t truly need it, let it go. If it gives you a genuine boost, it may earn its place.
- A text can read as “I’m busy,” while a call can read as “I care. ” Even simple choices send signals. If your channel creates the wrong impression, adjust and clarify your intent.
- Think scheduling meetings, reviewing documents, and entering expenses. Instead of spacing them out across the day, stack them together into one uninterrupted block. Be sure to organize your work by the type of thinking it requires – reading, deciding, drafting – rather than by which app it’s in.
- What if you’d waited an hour and answered with clarity and purpose? Triage each message into three buckets – reply within an hour, a day, or a week – and route the nonurgent messages to your next batch block or stream slot.
- This is the cadence you want: slower, clearer replies at predictable times.
- Digital tools make the leap from data to story easy – sometimes too easy. (ASSUMPTIONS)
Notes:
- we often think of attention as passive, but staying focused takes real energy. Every time you switch tasks – from an article to a text to a notification – your brain has to reorient and burn extra fuel. The more you switch, the more drained you feel, even if you haven’t done anything physical. Phones make those jumps feel effortless, but the cost adds up quickly. Maybe you’re toggling between apps, hopping across platforms, or trying to finish a report while answering messages from your kid’s school.
- Screens act like both portals and mirrors, pulling you into guessing what others think while also reflecting you back at yourself. Even on video calls, part of your attention hovers over your own face, watching yourself perform. All that self-monitoring drains cognitive energy and adds an emotional load. Emotions play a huge role in burnout, and tech amplifies them by making you feel less in control.
obvs notes:
- digital exhaustion – your mental battery draining while your devices keep demanding attention.
January 5, 2026
The rules chapters were all things I had heard before but I appreciated the last several chapters that focus on awareness and how we can use tech and AI better.
February 12, 2026
Interesting at first, but soon becomes repetitive and loses focus.
November 22, 2025
Far more granular and practical than previous works I have read on the phenomena, such as Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport. Has things for people who cannot simply unplug from digital tools. Recommend.
Did Not Finish
February 18, 2026DNF.. reading this book made me exhausted 🫠
December 4, 2025
Digital exhaustion has been on the rise, with major upticks ~2010, when social media exploded, and ~2020, when COVID took over. Despite our reliance on digital technology and its many benefits in improving our connectivity and productivity, we have grown weary of its drain on our time and other resources, to the detriment of our personal relationships and peace of mind. We all need expert advice to help us cope with the constant barrage of annoying and/or less-than-helpful news stories, unsolicited advice, product/service offers, and other types of distractions.
According to the publisher’s summary, “Paul Leonardi maps out an achievable path to reducing your digital exhaustion [apart from unplugging, which is at best a short-term solution], drawing on extensive research to show how real people can use technology in healthy ways. These are realistic approaches that won’t fragment your attention and deplete your cognitive and emotional reserves. Many of the changes are simple yet surprisingly effective, like waiting longer to respond, making sure you’re using the right tool for your task, and being more conscious of the time and energy we allocate to our devices. He also explains the emotional traps that lead us into dysfunctional relationships with our technology, and how to escape them.
Leonardi tells us that in his research tracking 12,000 workers across 12 countries over 2 decades, from 2002 to 2022, the average digital exhaustion score went from 2.6 to 5.5, on a 0-6 scale. Exhaustion isn’t weakness: It’s physics. Like a phone battery that loses capacity, draining faster and faster, as it ages, our brains lose the ability to stay sharp all day. Our cognitive battery drains faster and faster as we age. Attempts at interpreting ambiguous messages or posts are particularly exhausting.
Contrary to conventional wisdom, multi-tasking isn’t a valuable skill; each context switching is a drain on our cognitive battery and a waste of the tiny reserve of energy, after accounting for vital functions such as breathing, heartbeat, and temperature regulation, that can be used for active thinking by our power-hungry brain. Leonardi has tracked 20 teams at three Fortune-500 companies, finding that the average knowledge worker toggles between apps and Web sites 1200 times per day. The cumulative exhaustion from all those energy-draining attention switches is mind-boggling.
Here are some of Leonardi’s pieces of advice.
- Be intentional: Don’t open windows and chase links capriciously.
- Use devices and apps sparingly: Pick a few and ditch the rest.
- Do not send e-mail replies with quick, incomplete messages.
- Do not view boundaries as limitations, but as energy preservers.
- Block windows of time for deep work, with silenced notifications.
- Use AI as time-saver or liberator, not as amplifier of exhaustion.
According to the publisher’s summary, “Paul Leonardi maps out an achievable path to reducing your digital exhaustion [apart from unplugging, which is at best a short-term solution], drawing on extensive research to show how real people can use technology in healthy ways. These are realistic approaches that won’t fragment your attention and deplete your cognitive and emotional reserves. Many of the changes are simple yet surprisingly effective, like waiting longer to respond, making sure you’re using the right tool for your task, and being more conscious of the time and energy we allocate to our devices. He also explains the emotional traps that lead us into dysfunctional relationships with our technology, and how to escape them.
Leonardi tells us that in his research tracking 12,000 workers across 12 countries over 2 decades, from 2002 to 2022, the average digital exhaustion score went from 2.6 to 5.5, on a 0-6 scale. Exhaustion isn’t weakness: It’s physics. Like a phone battery that loses capacity, draining faster and faster, as it ages, our brains lose the ability to stay sharp all day. Our cognitive battery drains faster and faster as we age. Attempts at interpreting ambiguous messages or posts are particularly exhausting.
Contrary to conventional wisdom, multi-tasking isn’t a valuable skill; each context switching is a drain on our cognitive battery and a waste of the tiny reserve of energy, after accounting for vital functions such as breathing, heartbeat, and temperature regulation, that can be used for active thinking by our power-hungry brain. Leonardi has tracked 20 teams at three Fortune-500 companies, finding that the average knowledge worker toggles between apps and Web sites 1200 times per day. The cumulative exhaustion from all those energy-draining attention switches is mind-boggling.
Here are some of Leonardi’s pieces of advice.
- Be intentional: Don’t open windows and chase links capriciously.
- Use devices and apps sparingly: Pick a few and ditch the rest.
- Do not send e-mail replies with quick, incomplete messages.
- Do not view boundaries as limitations, but as energy preservers.
- Block windows of time for deep work, with silenced notifications.
- Use AI as time-saver or liberator, not as amplifier of exhaustion.
December 7, 2025
Exactly the book I was looking for to help me make sense of my and others’ evolving relationship with technology, particularly this year when I’ve been in more of a desk job role that I have found tends to follow me home. The Part I overview of exhaustion from a sociology lens was insightful on how the interplay between Attention, Inference, and Emotion modulate our sense of exhaustion. Part II with the rules for resilience, while simple, were full of illustrative and interesting anecdotes including examples of research the author has conducted in this space. I immediately tested out Rule 1: Stop Using Half Your Tools and have been more cognizant of which contexts to apply Rule 2: Make a Match, Rule 3: Batch and Stream, and Rule 4: Wait. One Hour. One Day. One Week. Continuing to work on Rule 6: Act with Intention and Rule 8: Be Here, Not Elsewhere. Part III had some additional frames on managers, parents, and (for all) working with AI in the future which were also quite intriguing. All in all would highly recommend to everyone and especially those looking to improve their relationship with technology and reground themselves!
May 8, 2026
Started off pretty good then just bogged down after a bit. Understand the concepts, but the book was more business oriented than I had hoped. If I was early or middle of my working career, I’d find it more informative. But I’m retiring soon so a lot of it did not resonate with me. Or rather I couldn’t care less, since I’m retiring, haha. Best way to get rid of constant technology at work is to retire!
May 21, 2026
A useful introduction, full of interesting and surprising research. A little contradictory where it found you might introduce a change that reduces your exhaustion but then you will get a reputation for not being reliable and colleagues will be upset. The scariest part was the various reviews into billions of emails sent between 1000+ employees in one company! What size of data centre is that needing and what is that impact on the planet....
October 8, 2025
Finally, a book about using technology written by a tech expert! I thought this was a great example of data-informed advice for managing the siren call of our devices. I appreciated the nuance and writing style.
January 9, 2026
3.5: helpful tips, I like the insights. Calling it “research” is a bit steep, IMO, but it is a good read for anyone who feels burnt out at work and needs to reflect on how much their technology is adding to that.
February 1, 2026
Actually 4.5 stars. Very useful addition to the broad "how to deal with technology" genre, especially the AI chapters. I think the "rules" will be very helpful for me. My only critique is that he probably could have been a bit more concise.
February 5, 2026
I picked this up, randomly off the new book shelf. It was interesting and had some new research but nothing shocking. The principles are good principles for life, not just for interactions with technology, such as being present.
March 24, 2026
If you write a book about how cell phones are bad, I will read it. And then I will listen to all your podcasts on it...on my phone. I feel like I've read every book about how bad phones are. This one was fine. It got redundant and I got bogged down, but I did finish it.
March 27, 2026
Plenty of good information but I listened to this on audio and definitely zoned out a lot. Stuff about workplace digital exhaustion doesn’t really apply to me but the overall message is good. Kind of hate anything that promotes use of AI even though I get how it’s relevant here.
March 7, 2026
Helpful tips, but too much focus on work. Wish it included more personal use of technology.
March 27, 2026
A lot of things that are common sense but need to be expalined to us sometimes, and also a lot of things that are helpful in explaining this common sense to other people
April 17, 2026
“To become active curators of our own digital experiences.” Mostly interesting and opens up a lot of thought for dialogue.
May 21, 2026
Good basic info but became repetitive
August 10, 2026
Got boring after the second part. Also not really any new knowledge
October 30, 2025
A very useful and practical examination of why interacting with our devices can cause fatigue, and advice on how to combat it. Some of the parts of the book got into the weeds a bit of various studies, and I found myself skimming some of the more detailed descriptions, but the writing was clear and easy to understand. The "rules" for adjusting technology use to decrease fatigue felt very practical and acknowledged that it isn't realistic to completely "detox" from technology altogether. The discussion of AI was also nuanced and informative. Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.
August 21, 2026
Practical advice for surviving the onslaught of digital devices in our always-on world, backed by science.
Displaying 1 - 23 of 23 reviews