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296 pages, Kindle Edition
First published March 17, 2026

Sufien again reckoned with the fact that what he was looking upon would never be his life. On this night, though, he could not simply dispense with the feeling. He had the sensation he was sinking. This was aging, the beginning of it. Now that he had a roof over his head again, the passing of time returned to Sufien. Temporarily reprieved from the dire concerns of survival, regret raced back in. He could not take any of the years back. Staring at Butler, teeming with all those lives yet to be lived, Sufien brushed up against his border, and this border was also a shackle, and on the other side of it, what awaited him.
Um Sufien knew better, she knew that loss begets loss. And that this was the beginning. Fortune begets fortune, and misfortune more misfortune. The curse warned of in nightmares of her mother and her mother’s mother had come for her. Now while all the other women in the camp rubbed their keys to their houses like talismans, Um Sufien accepted that she would never see her homeland again. Where had this awareness come from? She could almost hear the prophecy aloud, spoken very plainly, very distinctly. Who was speaking? The voice was her own. They would not return. Not her, not her children, and not even her children’s children. Palestine already belonged to another Earth.
What had Abdul Jalil done to their name? He had given himself over to war, first against the British, and then the Zionists. In the early ’40s, his own father had even shared a prophecy with Abdul Jalil: That he, Abdul Jalil, would lose everything, would live in a foreign place, under an unforgiving sun, and that he would meet his end there. No matter what you do, his father shook his head, ya rab. Back then, Abdul Jalil mistrusted the old man’s superstitions. He had felt so exuberant. He was liberating Palestine. There was nothing quite like the mania of a revolution holding up the thin body of a man. Then there was the defeat and more defeat. A man can lose a war once, but losing twice, again, is a verdict, or an edict. A decree. Abdul Jalil would never win. He was not just on the losing side: He was a loser.
Only Sufien knew the answer to this question. It was the day Sarah accompanied him to chemo and asked that question of Dr. Scott: How long does he have? She thought she was being brave. She thought she could bear the truth. And when Dr. Scott said six months, Sufien replied kus emic, and promptly began to die. That very day. His home had always been lost by the pronouncement of another. This was character; this was fate. Palestine is no longer your home; your body is no longer your home. And so, he was on his way.