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384 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2014
So I picked up her book, and the first chapter opened my eyes to something new. Hunh, here I thought I was doing the right thing by taking it easy when I go in to the gym sporadically, afraid of how much I know it'll hurt if I work too hard at it, afraid of how sore I might be the next days afterwards if I push too hard. (However, listening to one's body is important and in general, I firmly believe in "do what works" - both short-term and long-term). I've been avoiding the gym because I know I've gotten out of the rhythm, out of the habit, and each metcon WOD will suck that much more, I know. I know how much it can hurt, and that knowledge is crippling. However, I've also known the joy and pride that comes from accomplishing something that you didn't think that you could do, and I've known what it feels like to triumph over oneself, and to watch others do the same. Those last parts, I haven't seen much in my sporadic attendance - I have to show up, first of all. (When I started CrossFit, I was 41 and mostly able to walk after a crippling lumbar disc herniation the prior year and have never considered myself to be an athlete-- when I attend CrossFit regularly, I'm often the strongest girl at the gym.)
But it seems that I've been missing an essential point - the intensity of working really hard for a little while is the point, and doing it in the company of others makes the pain and suffering not as bad. The scientific benefits to the body of working out really hard for a short amount of time are, frankly, amazing, particularly when compared to slogging things out for hours over some medium-energy workout. I love that I can get better results in shorter time, if I'm just willing to work hard and endure some unpleasantness. It's not all that bad, but it can look bad and crazy when you watch it from afar.
Learning to Breathe Fire reminded me of why I love CrossFit - the challenge, the inspiration, the power of community, the seeming insanity of it, how bonding it is and how it can break down walls between people, and how powerful simple acknowledgement and positive feedback can be. Reading the book has got me re-fired up to get back into working out, and I've gone as many times to the gym in the past week as I have in the past number of months (yes, really.)
I've heard about Glassman and Amundson and Khalipa before (I go to Khalipa's NorCal CrossFit - Khalipa taught my on-ramp class in fact*), and it was engaging to hear more of their backstories. I watched the CrossFit Games in person in 2011, despite not really knowing anyone at my gym and feeling incredibly insecure because I didn't yet look like a CrossFitter. Not sure if I look like one now, although I've managed to drop some extra pounds since then. Along the way I've consulted with a sports psychologist, because I wanted to know what it's like to think like an athlete so that I can be more like them. I've worked on my goats (running, ugh), and improved them some.
The other day, I did a hero wod (Barraza) that involved my favorite movement (deadlifts) and two of my least liked movements (running and burpees). I scaled the Rx weight a bit to 165, and I thought I'd have to remove some weight during the wod, because I haven't been working out much this year - but I didn't, and I did solid sets of three deadlifts the whole wod (an 18 min AMRAP: 200m run, 9 deadlifts, 6 burpee bar muscle ups (ok, so they were just burpees for me, another scaling). I was the strongest girl in class, although the slowest too (my metcon needs work). I used the running and burpees as recovery time (hah! I laughed at that mental triumph, how I never would've thought that running time could be my downtime). Never mind the numbers, doing that workout made my body feel so good through and through - it was refreshing to feel so in tune with the deadlifts, to realize yet again that my body areas that I've frequently thought of as my worst (thighs, butt, and wounded back) are indeed assets of considerable strength and ability. (Back in grade school, they teased me and called me Bubble Butt -- which I now know is a fabulous thing, but I didn't know that back then.)
This may all sound stupid and lame and boring to you, but the experience of doing more than I thought I could and doing well at something that I never dreamed I could do well at is more inspiring and amazing to me than any words on a page or screen can ever fully communicate. Doing all of that while being in my 40's, holding a stressful job at a startup, being a homeowner, grieving over my Dad who passed away last year, and enjoying my first boyfriend in ten years (a triumph in and of itself) - it's hard to describe. One of thing things I love about CrossFit is how it redefines what's possible for people in general, and particularly it redefines what's possible as we age and as we deal with stressors and challenges. CrossFit isn't the only game in town that redefines what's possible, but it's one of the few that do that and can fully engage you and get you fit and feeling good in your body.
p.s. It was comforting to learn why it can be so hard to count how much weight is on a bar during a workout, despite having an affinity and ability with math. Page 13 explains why (thank you! I thought it was just me being silly or stupid).
* I fell down when I tried a deep squat, and Jason pulled me up - I was mortified (I was not small), but he had nothing going on about it at all. It turns out that the ability to do a deep squat is a muscle-based, strength thing, a technique - I always had thought I couldn't do it because my butt was too big. hah! go figure.