Overall: ⅕ I started this book to break up the awful monotony of The Unseen Ones (book two in Harrington’s other horrible series) Authors are usually supposed to grow as they put out more books, but harrington gets so so much worse. This is an illustrated book, which is supposed to be human made art, but more on that later
Octavia (Female Main Character): ⅕ Oh my good, Octavia is horrible. She’s extremely annoying, but clearly not in a way that’s intentional. She is desperate for Azariah’s attention throughout the entire book, but it’s supposed to be slow burn? At one point, Azariah buys her some clothes, and she’s like, “is this an act of kindness?” This is in the first few chapters of knowing him. She eventually becomes self-rightous too, and goes on and on about how she’s the keyholder and she’s so special, blah blah blah. She completely lacks any depth, and things are constantly happening to her, rather than just being involved in the plot.
Azariah (Male Main Character): ⅕ Azariah is supposed to be our, “new book boyfriend” according to all of Harrington’s marketing. Would you like a boyfriend who jerks you around by your arm on several occasions? He does this before him and Octavia get together, but it’s never addressed. There’s never even a half-hearted apology. He’s the type of boyfriend that’ll punch walls and then say at least it wasn’t you. When he isn’t being an abusive turd, he’s doing absolutely nothing. He has no personality. Is that Harrington’s way of making him mysterious? He’s just boring and dull. He only exists to further Octavia’s plot, and the whole book could’ve existed without him. When he does talk it’s only to justify why he was a jerk by saying Octavia reminds him of his dead wife. (Of course he has a dead wife. It wouldn’t be a grocery store paperback without that tired plot point.)
Absalom (Side character): ⅕ What was his purpose? He was only there to help Octavia escape, get food to them, and prove pierre is bad. There was no emotion at his death because we knew nothing about him. Harrington handles nothing with respect. She constantly refers to him as, “the sick boy.” Would you only refer to a child with a profound disability as, “the disabled child?” No, because it’s disrespectful. Eventually, he’s referred to as, “the dead boy” for the rest of the book.
Villains: ⅕ Harrington thinks she writes amazing villains. She calls them despicable and vile. Maybe she means like Gru from Despicable Me, because they’re all basically cartoon characters.They’re so goofy and silly, and none of them are scary. If you have to say your villains are sooo bad, are they?
Pierre (Villain): ⅕ He’s so goofy. At one point he throws his pointer finger in the air and yells, “Let’s go boys!” to get his army to move. That is hilarious and such a Disney Channel villain thing to do. He comes off very…gay. I mean that literally here, everything he does screams, “hey I like men.” He’s supposed to be a scary scary rapist though? So I guess he isn’t gay, but she definitely wrote him more silly than scary. At one point he laughs and says, "I'm so bad." He reminds me of Count Olaf, but the really horrible Jim Carrey version. He lays his whole plan out to her like Dr. Doofenschmirtz, and all of his dialogue with her is lame and childish. His only purpose is to give Azariah a backstory and Octavia some adversary when going into the darkness. Oh, and to kidnap Octavia yet again. At one point, he literally screams, “RONAN!” into the air while Azariah is getting away. Like a Scooby Doo villain. His constant mustache twirling is absolutely hilarious, but not in the way Danielle might think. It just further adds to the cartoon vibes. He’s always saying he’s going to, “have his way” with Octavia or “violate” her. Can the author not say rape? More on that later. Speaking of rape, his motives for continuing to persue Azariah don’t make sense. He already murdered and raped Rebekah. He’s mad because Azariah cut his face? His injuries don’t make sense either, like logistically.
Voramir (Villain): ⅕ He only exists to tell Octavia she’s blood bound to the key. Oh, and he pokes her with a knife, and it somehow leaves a big ass wound. That wound is brought up by Harrington again ¾ of the way through the novel, which is crazy because it for sure would’ve been an issue before that. It hurts again a little after that too when Harrington needs it to.
Elak (villain): ⅕ He’s tied with Pierre for cheesiest villain. He’s so dramatic all the time but in that special Disney Villain way Danielle makes all her own. The parts with him are mostly dry and stupid.
Elthron (villain): He only exists because Danielle remembered Octavia had a dad. Octavia spent the entire book worried about her mom and brother, but she thought about her dad exactly 0 times. He was sent to go confront the darkness. You know, the thing that kills you if you touch it. Octavia didn’t even ponder if he was okay.
Bathroom creep (villain) Attempted rape: 1/5 He only exists so that Danielle could use the touch her and you die troupe. The creep lightly grazed her vagina with her clothes still on. Octavia never mentions it again, so was it not traumatic? When Octavia does talk about it, she only mentions how Azariah killed for her, not how that attempt made her feel. It was just a super insensitive way for Harrington to make Octavia see Azariah differently. It was not at all handled delicately by Danielle. No one ever says the word, “rape” either. It’s always something goofy like, “violate” or “have his way with her.” If you’re going to write about it, you need to be able to say the word. Or maybe you shouldn’t be writing about it. When you pair this with Harrington’s weird dedication it comes off very, “just get over it Octavia.”
Dedication: Might as well touch on it while we’re here. Her dedication basically says that her book is for those who know that the fruit of walking through the darkness is better than having it removed. Excuse me? I’d rather not have gone through some of the crap that I’ve been through, and that take reeks of privilege. Oh yeah, I was abandoned and molested, but Danielle says that the “fruit” of that is better than having loving parents. Don’t write trauma if you're going to be insensitive and disrespectful to actual victims on the first page. The next page has a Bible verse on it, even though this book totally isn’t a Christian book guys.
Plot: ⅕ This is just badly reimagined and thinly veiled Bible stories with a loose love plot weaved in. The whole thing is Juvenile and stupid. Octavia accidentally cuts her hand while trying to cut a fishing line, and that’s how she got the key. She keeps saying, “If it wasn’t for that unfortunate fishing accident I wouldn’t be in this mess!” It’s crazy corny and reads like a middle grade book. The physics of her cutting herself don’t make much sense either. The whole plot is inconsistent. At one point, Azariah is sneaking her out in a wheelbarrow. Then, he hooks the wheelbarrow to a horse? A few sentences later the wheelbarrow is a cart, and it’s full of stuff. Caska is supposedly rare, but everyone has it. Every time anyone is eating it’s almost always Caska. We’re constantly being asked several questions in a row via monologue instead of Harrington showing us how that might play out or why it’s a problem. It’s like I’m at the end of a bad soap opera. “Will Pierre have his way with Octavia? Does Azariah ever get that cube of cheese from Absalom? How did that wheelbarrow turn into a cart? Will Danielle ever actually hire an editor? Tune in next week to find out on, Keyholer.” Octavia is also kidnapped a stupid amount of times, and it always plays out the same way like from a template. It gets old really fast. The kidnappings only serve to move her through the lands.
Prose: ⅕ It is so clunky and bad. There is way too much metaphor, and you can tell when Danielle got lost in it. Just like her last books, everything is happening in the MCs stomach. At one point it somersaulted. You can’t tell me that doesn’t sound like a kids chapter book. Here’s a list of Harrington’s CONSTANTLY repeated words: And then, With that, As well, Clutches, All the lands, Parcels, Soul, Heart breaking/fracturing, and Mouth splitting into smile.
Dialogue: ⅕ No one talks to each other the way Harrington’s characters do. It’s all so childish and goofy. Most of it lacks substance. All the voices are indistinct from each other. There are a lot of times where dialogue is just used as a giant info-dump.
World Building: ⅕ There isn’t much. She describes the 5 senses of every town she visits, but that’s it. There are no houses described. When we see animals, they’re already food. No one has a caska in their yard. There are no yards. She follows a script with describing, and it makes the whole thing drag along. We spend almost no time in the lands and most of the time in the woods. We get no details on anyone’s economy, police force, business, the military, ect.
Religion: ⅕ This wasn’t advertised as a Christian book, but it is. The whole thing is Bible stories. Explanation of the religious system isn’t given until the last three chapters. Even then, the religion is just christianity and isn’t explained any further. She’s supposed to go bring the light to the world, and the darkness is stored in her. Seriously? Could you be more on the nose with the Bible stories?
Magic System: ⅕ Nothing is ever explained. We have no idea how the waters work. The explanations we do get are vague and sometimes juvenile or don’t make sense.
Romance: ⅕ It’s not slow burn. Not even close. As soon as Azariah does anything polite Octavia thinks he’s in love with her. We’re spoon fed the romance through Octavia’s weird assumptions. It’s very rushed when the romance does happen. He gives no reason for her to fall in love, and his only reason for loving her is that she looks like his dead wife. As previously discussed, he abuses her twice before they’re together, and it’s never addressed. He apologizes for, “losing his temper” as if he didn’t just squeeze her arm so hard his knuckles were white. The romance isn’t the main plot even though the book is described as a romantasy. The no spice physical intimacy (kissing) comes out of nowhere, and it wasn’t well written.
Here’s several other things that deserve their own category:
Beating you over the head with descriptions: If someone is old every description about them will tell you that. It isn’t just their finger. It’s their shriveled finger. Crinkly eyes, sagging face, wrinkly jowls. She does the same with fat people, and it comes off extremely disrespectful. It's their pudgy face, fat hand, round stomach, chins plural. She needs to learn to get to the point with her descriptions too.
Food description: Do you like food? Well, you won’t anymore after reading Danielle’s descriptions. She says Octavia wants to feel fish, “flake through her teeth.” That sounds like she’s flossing with a fish. Here’s a direct quote about someone eating caska,” He stuck the roasted bird into his mouth, chewing it and letting the juices dribble down his chin.” Disgusting.
Octavia’s Period: Just like with rape, Danielle can’t even say the word period. It’s her, “flow.” Once again, don’t write about something if you can’t say it. We also don’t see the period start. She just tells us she started it several days before. Every girl knows the feeling of when your period starts and the mad dash to get a period product. We get none of that. At one point she’s free bleeding on a white horse, and we don’t see that get stained at all. She would definitely stink, but that’s not described. Period cramps are never talked about or any other symptoms for that matter. Does she have acne? Is she cranky? Is she craving something specific? She puts the same wet pants back on after cleaning up even though that would feel disgusting. That feeling is never described. She’d probably have a massive yeast infection or TSS. It’s clear Harrington put this in as an afterthought.
Plagiarism: There are several direct quotes from Harry Potter, The Bible, Hunger Games (catching fire), Mulan, and Percy Jackson.
Illustrations: All of Harrington’s illustrations are exceptionally bad. She claims they are all 100% human made art. They reek of AI. I ran them through several AI checkers, and they all came back as 100% AI. I can’t add photos to GoodReads, but I’ll try to host a link with proof of this. She never credits her artist on the copyright page, the acknowledgements, or on socials. So, I did some digging. She tagged her in one post when she first started getting illustrations back. I went to the page on Instagram, and the artist has a Fivver. The artist is very clearly using AI. Her gigs talk about the types of photos that you have to send and literally uses the words, “generate” and “repeat” in her listings. She expresses that the finished, "repeated"m photos won't look exactly like the ones you sent her. She doesn’t even sign her art. I’m assuming that’s why Danielle only tagged her the one time and didn’t put credit for her in the book because she was worried the artist would comment that she does actually use AI. Either that, or she was embarrassed that she got scammed so easily. Also, Danielle’s cover is AI made by Damonza. She credited them for some reason though even though they don’t hide that they’re AI.
Editing: Harrington clearly didn’t have an editor. There are so many mistakes in this book that if you played a drinking game with them, you’d die. You can’t convince me she wasn’t drunk when writing and editing this book. It reads like bad watpad stories.
Missing Page: There was a whole page missing from my book. It was a pretty important page too because it’s Azariah saying goodbye to Octavia at the darkness. Without it, she suddenly teleports in front of the darkness, and Azariah is gone. I had access to the E-book, so I went back and read it there. It…wasn’t great. I’m just glad I ordered the paperback because the people who got the hardback still don’t have the books, and there’s been little communication or apology from Danielle. She actually said, “This is why KickStarter said your products aren’t guaranteed.” Uh, no it isn't’t? They mean that just because you back something doesn’t mean it will get enough backers to get made. Here’s the full quote on that from KickStarter, “If you're an early backer, supporting the project before it reaches its goal, it's important for you to be aware that you're not yet guaranteed a product. Importantly, on Kickstarter, payments from backers are only taken if a project is successfully funded and at the conclusion of the project.” You still have to send people their books, Danielle. It’s been over two months now. It took several months longer to get my E-book too. She said that she feels like she should apologize, but it isn’t her fault BookVault is taking so long. I did a short Google search of BookVault and found so many bad reviews. In a matter of minutes. You should apologize because you’re the one who picked a shoddy manufacturer, and you made us wait on the, “early release” E-book. I think I got it a few weeks before the book was supposed to come out instead of a few months. There's a reason most of her reviews are fellow authors. They're probably doing review trades.
EDIT: I wanted to give Harrington the benefit of the doubt that she didn't know. She posted the "line work" from the artist and seemed oblivious to the fact that this is a common scam. She paid very little for these (her reviews are up on Fiverr with prices. I have screenshots of that too.) But now she's going through and deleting a bunch of her AI marketing. That just screams guilty backpedaling after getting called out, not just by me, but on threads as well.