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A Final Girl's Guide To The Horrors Of Dating
These days, dating's no loger like a rom-com.
It's more like a horror show.
So, it’s time to become the Final Girl.
Aka the one who makes it out alive.
From dating expert and top relationship podcaster, Rory Uphold, A Final Girl’s Guide to the Horrors of Dating is what happens when a hopeful romantic survives modern love’s monsters (ghosts, narcissits, clowns) then gives you all the tools to do it too.
Part memoir, part survival manual, this brutally honest and wickedly funny dating book is for anyone who’s been burned but still dares to believe in love.
With the wit and the candor of your most unfiltered friend, Rory walks you through the many “horrors” afflicting modern love. From serial cheaters to the ways we cheat ourselves, this book doesn’t just commiserate with your romantic nightmares; it arms you with the tools to rise above them.
Inside these pages, you’ll learn how
Spot red flags before they become full-blown horror scenesBreak toxic dating patternsStop wasting time in dead-end relationshipsSurvive bed deathGlow up after heartbreakExorcize the inner demons telling you you’re too much or not enoughShake off shame and societal pressure around being singleRomanticize whatever phase of life you’re inBecome the Final Girl of your own movieYou’ll laugh, cringe, maybe even scream—but by the end, you’ll remember that the Final Girl not only makes it out alive, she thrives. And you can too.
Pick up your copy today, so you can defeat modern love's monsters and get your happy ending afterall.
It's more like a horror show.
So, it’s time to become the Final Girl.
Aka the one who makes it out alive.
From dating expert and top relationship podcaster, Rory Uphold, A Final Girl’s Guide to the Horrors of Dating is what happens when a hopeful romantic survives modern love’s monsters (ghosts, narcissits, clowns) then gives you all the tools to do it too.
Part memoir, part survival manual, this brutally honest and wickedly funny dating book is for anyone who’s been burned but still dares to believe in love.
With the wit and the candor of your most unfiltered friend, Rory walks you through the many “horrors” afflicting modern love. From serial cheaters to the ways we cheat ourselves, this book doesn’t just commiserate with your romantic nightmares; it arms you with the tools to rise above them.
Inside these pages, you’ll learn how
Spot red flags before they become full-blown horror scenesBreak toxic dating patternsStop wasting time in dead-end relationshipsSurvive bed deathGlow up after heartbreakExorcize the inner demons telling you you’re too much or not enoughShake off shame and societal pressure around being singleRomanticize whatever phase of life you’re inBecome the Final Girl of your own movieYou’ll laugh, cringe, maybe even scream—but by the end, you’ll remember that the Final Girl not only makes it out alive, she thrives. And you can too.
Pick up your copy today, so you can defeat modern love's monsters and get your happy ending afterall.
- GenresRomance
322 pages, Kindle Edition
Published October 1, 2025
15 people are currently reading
181 people want to read
About the author
Rory Uphold
2 booksRory Uphold is a multi-hyphenate creator, performer, and accidental dating anthropologist. She began her writing career in music as a songwriter before transitioning into television, where she’s developed and sold original shows to your favorite networks. Rory lives in Los Angeles, where she hosts a podcast and regularly shares snippets of her life on social media. She loves John Williams' film scores, collecting vintage coffee mugs, and staying out of the sun.
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Displaying 1 - 15 of 15 reviews
September 20, 2025
I received this book as an ARC in exchange for my honest review. Although frankly, I would have purchased it for sure, because I have been listening to Rory’s podcast for a while now and I follow her on socials.
As for the book, for the most part, I would have given it a 4,5 out of 5 stars rating, but there was one chapter that really tipped it for me. The one about the abortion. Rory, if you’re reading this, THANK YOU for recounting the experience in such detail, I can’t imagine it was easy. To every woman out there: do yourself a favor and read this book, and the chapter about abortion twice. Not that all women will have abortions, it’s not at all what I’m saying. But the truth is, we will sometimes face this super difficult choice in life and we need to know exactly what to prepare for. I mean, exactly. I honestly think that this chapter is PSA.
All in all, we’ve all been there, in one situation or another. I personally could relate to much of what Rory talks about throughout the book and, while I sometimes chuckled, I would most often just nod and go “That’s about right” almost on repeat. I’m pretty sure we can all see ourselves in the stories, which can only mean one thing: they can also help us improve. And we all want that, right?
Do yourself a favor and get this book immediately. The “aha” moments might just change your life.
As for the book, for the most part, I would have given it a 4,5 out of 5 stars rating, but there was one chapter that really tipped it for me. The one about the abortion. Rory, if you’re reading this, THANK YOU for recounting the experience in such detail, I can’t imagine it was easy. To every woman out there: do yourself a favor and read this book, and the chapter about abortion twice. Not that all women will have abortions, it’s not at all what I’m saying. But the truth is, we will sometimes face this super difficult choice in life and we need to know exactly what to prepare for. I mean, exactly. I honestly think that this chapter is PSA.
All in all, we’ve all been there, in one situation or another. I personally could relate to much of what Rory talks about throughout the book and, while I sometimes chuckled, I would most often just nod and go “That’s about right” almost on repeat. I’m pretty sure we can all see ourselves in the stories, which can only mean one thing: they can also help us improve. And we all want that, right?
Do yourself a favor and get this book immediately. The “aha” moments might just change your life.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 23, 2025
I received an Advanced Readers Copy in exchange for an honest review.
I keep going back and forth between 4/5 and 5/5 stars. I ended up choosing 4/5 because a 5/5 book is PERFECT and I do have some *imperfect feelings* about this book.
Things that work really well: this book is honest and vulnerable. it is well written and thoughtful. Rory is a girls girl, and does a great job of mitigating the shame and judgement that accompanies challenging and common experiences often associated with being female. I also liked that she cited real research throughout the book. She also creates action by giving reflection questions and tasks at the end of each chapter so we can all incorporate some of these lessons into our own life and experiences. It's both memoir and self-help without being too much of either. It's relevant and personal and applicable.
Things that I struggled with: I do not like the cover. I know it sounds silly, but aesthetics and skincare matter (and a cover is skincare for a book). It was so realistic, and I saw the behaviors and personalities of Rory's horror stories in my own and my friends' relationships. Second, whether she meant to or not, I was left feeling a little hopeless about dating (men) and as though it's not really worth the risk. I know for a fact (or as close to it given that I only know Rory parasocially online) that Rory has close and safe relationships with (straight) men (even if just platonically) and that her female friends are married to "not horror-show" men. It would have been nice to hear a little but about her experience in platonic male friendships and witnessing healthy safe straight relationships (even if from the perspective of a heartbroken single person).
Regardless, this is 100% worth the read, and I would absolutely recommend this book to friends.
I keep going back and forth between 4/5 and 5/5 stars. I ended up choosing 4/5 because a 5/5 book is PERFECT and I do have some *imperfect feelings* about this book.
Things that work really well: this book is honest and vulnerable. it is well written and thoughtful. Rory is a girls girl, and does a great job of mitigating the shame and judgement that accompanies challenging and common experiences often associated with being female. I also liked that she cited real research throughout the book. She also creates action by giving reflection questions and tasks at the end of each chapter so we can all incorporate some of these lessons into our own life and experiences. It's both memoir and self-help without being too much of either. It's relevant and personal and applicable.
Things that I struggled with: I do not like the cover. I know it sounds silly, but aesthetics and skincare matter (and a cover is skincare for a book). It was so realistic, and I saw the behaviors and personalities of Rory's horror stories in my own and my friends' relationships. Second, whether she meant to or not, I was left feeling a little hopeless about dating (men) and as though it's not really worth the risk. I know for a fact (or as close to it given that I only know Rory parasocially online) that Rory has close and safe relationships with (straight) men (even if just platonically) and that her female friends are married to "not horror-show" men. It would have been nice to hear a little but about her experience in platonic male friendships and witnessing healthy safe straight relationships (even if from the perspective of a heartbroken single person).
Regardless, this is 100% worth the read, and I would absolutely recommend this book to friends.
October 7, 2025
I don't usually read self-help style books, but I have to confess I was sold by the title. However, I am not sure that this book can even be properly classified as “self-help” when it is closer to a memoir, with tales from the author’s dating history alternated with some advice and checklist questions you should ask yourself.
While the title is what drew me in, including horror tropes as metaphors for the different men felt very forced. Ex-boyfriend named Jack becomes Jack the Ripper and a friend who suddenly kisses her becomes a werewolf. The stories are great examples of different dating scenarios someone might find themselves in, but the horror movie character comparisons, for me, took away from the fact that everyone involved is very much human.
What I appreciate the most is how candidly she speaks about sex. There is a big focus in normalizing the subject and making women aware that the best thing they can do for their own pleasure is to be aware of their likes and dislikes. It also made me very happy to see both scientific journals and interesting statistics cited.
This was simply not the book for me, but I can definitely see how others might enjoy it. I am certain the tales can provide valuable insight and teach some women about certain situations that they might be better off avoiding in the future.
Thank you to NetGalley and Rory Uphold for the advanced copy. This review is left voluntarily and honestly.
While the title is what drew me in, including horror tropes as metaphors for the different men felt very forced. Ex-boyfriend named Jack becomes Jack the Ripper and a friend who suddenly kisses her becomes a werewolf. The stories are great examples of different dating scenarios someone might find themselves in, but the horror movie character comparisons, for me, took away from the fact that everyone involved is very much human.
What I appreciate the most is how candidly she speaks about sex. There is a big focus in normalizing the subject and making women aware that the best thing they can do for their own pleasure is to be aware of their likes and dislikes. It also made me very happy to see both scientific journals and interesting statistics cited.
This was simply not the book for me, but I can definitely see how others might enjoy it. I am certain the tales can provide valuable insight and teach some women about certain situations that they might be better off avoiding in the future.
Thank you to NetGalley and Rory Uphold for the advanced copy. This review is left voluntarily and honestly.
October 13, 2025
I’ve been a married gal for a very long time, so I never had the “pleasure” of navigating the LA dating scene (or really any dating scene), but A Final Girl’s Guide to the Horrors of Dating by Rory Uphold was still a BANGER of a read. She somehow makes modern romance feel both terrifying and hilarious, and she does it with zero judgment.
Rory’s voice reads like your funniest, sharpest friend, unfiltered, wild, and wise. She walks you through everything: spotting red flags early, breaking toxic patterns, embracing heartbreak, and becoming the Final Girl in your own story.
Whether you’re single, coupled, or somewhere in between, this book is for anyone who’s ever felt seen, burned, hopeful, or haunted by their own dating demons. I laughed, I cringed, I screengrabbed whole pages and sent to friends. If you care about love and surviving its chaos, you need to read this.
Rory’s voice reads like your funniest, sharpest friend, unfiltered, wild, and wise. She walks you through everything: spotting red flags early, breaking toxic patterns, embracing heartbreak, and becoming the Final Girl in your own story.
Whether you’re single, coupled, or somewhere in between, this book is for anyone who’s ever felt seen, burned, hopeful, or haunted by their own dating demons. I laughed, I cringed, I screengrabbed whole pages and sent to friends. If you care about love and surviving its chaos, you need to read this.
September 10, 2025
Received an arc for an honest review.
Book: Humored memoir/self help
Im a horror, and horror/romance fanatic so immediately the title and premise captured me. The construct was a novel idea yet ringing to "Hes Just Not That Into You" while comparing the experiences to horror tropes.
I really enjoyed the humor and self reflection the author has. The writing is very well done and edited. I enjoy this type of self help book, where you can relate to the author and what they have gone through.
The cover is lacking and needs a upgrade to really catch readers attention.
Book: Humored memoir/self help
Im a horror, and horror/romance fanatic so immediately the title and premise captured me. The construct was a novel idea yet ringing to "Hes Just Not That Into You" while comparing the experiences to horror tropes.
I really enjoyed the humor and self reflection the author has. The writing is very well done and edited. I enjoy this type of self help book, where you can relate to the author and what they have gone through.
The cover is lacking and needs a upgrade to really catch readers attention.
September 16, 2025
This book is any girls guide to navigating the horrifying and sometimes horrifyingly funny, modern dating world. It is fast paced and full of wit leaving you feeling like you’re swapping dating horror stories with your best friend.
My favorite part were the questions at the end of each chapter to ask yourself. They were fun to do on my own and actually learned a lot about myself along the way!
My favorite part were the questions at the end of each chapter to ask yourself. They were fun to do on my own and actually learned a lot about myself along the way!
October 2, 2025
This book is so clever & and absolutely must read for all women, single & coupled-up up alike. You will extra like it if you’re a thriller reader familiar with the “final girl” trope. Rory’s brutal honesty is both refreshing & hilarious — but also hopeful. I laughed out loud so much throughout this. Thank you for the ARC in exchange for an honest review!
October 5, 2025
I hate that every one of these stories is relatable… Rory might just be the voice of a generation! This book perfectly intertwines millennial dating with classic horror tropes and refreshingly insightful and applicable personal development tools. This isn’t SATC or Mel Robbins - single or coupled, this is the red pill of millennial enlightenment that we didn’t know we needed
October 7, 2025
Super fun memoir by an LA 20/30something that connects the dating world to horror tropes. It's got great humor, but also depth.
Great pop culture for the "Scream" fans out there. But if you're experiencing dating fatigue, you will GET IT. My favorite part takes place in a literal haunted house. Oh – and the chapter about witches.
Great pop culture for the "Scream" fans out there. But if you're experiencing dating fatigue, you will GET IT. My favorite part takes place in a literal haunted house. Oh – and the chapter about witches.
January 7, 2026
A great insight into the world of dating and the different scenarios you can encounter. Told with humor and personality this was a really good guide to either read all the way through or even skim chapters that apply to you.
Thank you to netgalley and the publishers for providing me with an arc for an honest review.
Thank you to netgalley and the publishers for providing me with an arc for an honest review.
October 9, 2025
This book is relatable in a way that's both cathartic and hopeful. Ultimately, it leaves the reader feeling empowered to take control of their own romantic narrative. I couldn't put it down—every single woman needs to read it.
November 7, 2025
She really puts in to perspective the horrors of dating, often relatable even if wildly unbelievable (which is a comfort on its own) this is a funny uplifting tale of maneuvering your own heart! Recommend!
November 11, 2025
I loved this book. It was a perfect depiction of modern dating and an ode to self-love with just the right amount of “fuck the patriarchy”. This book was scarily relatable, comforting and hilarious.
November 14, 2025
Incredibly witty, genuine and real. I wish I was able to read this when I was single in my 20s in LA!!
December 9, 2025
OMG this book is funny, entertaining and tells the truths about modern dating scaries. But also offers fun practical solutions.
Displaying 1 - 15 of 15 reviews