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Beyond Zero
She wondered what had become of her.
A mute kind of darkness had settled in—numbing her until she felt nothing at all.
No warmth. No glow.
Not even the comfort of tears.
She was buried beneath her own wreckage.
A sorrow too still, too deep, slowly hollowed her out, long after life had taken her color.
Her voice.
Her name.
There might've been a better way to live—but she never learned how.
This isn't where her story began, but it is where it ends—
in a journal she never meant for anyone to read.
Quietly.
Slowly.
Until she was no longer easy to find.
A mute kind of darkness had settled in—numbing her until she felt nothing at all.
No warmth. No glow.
Not even the comfort of tears.
She was buried beneath her own wreckage.
A sorrow too still, too deep, slowly hollowed her out, long after life had taken her color.
Her voice.
Her name.
There might've been a better way to live—but she never learned how.
This isn't where her story began, but it is where it ends—
in a journal she never meant for anyone to read.
Quietly.
Slowly.
Until she was no longer easy to find.
151 pages, Paperback
Published August 29, 2025
1 person is currently reading
4 people want to read
About the author
Asawer K.
2 books9 followersMy stories uncover the hidden moments we rarely admit to, but all of us know. At the heart of my writing is the belief that even our heaviest truths deserve to be heard.
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Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews
September 16, 2025
This is one of those books that's not really about a specific plot — the story here is told via emotions instead.
Written with a stream of consciousness style, the story is revealed to us through the journal entries of a young woman that is very clearly suffering from depression (and perhaps some anxiety as well). The writing style is overall rather simple, making it technically easy to read — however this book really packs a punch emotionally. "Beyond Zero" proves that you don't need a bunch of fancy words or metaphors to convey strong emotions, you just have to be open and honest.
For readers who have personal experience with depression, this will likely be a relatable story. I personally found it to very accurately portray thoughts that I myself had when I was at my worst with depression in the past (especially during my school years). It really hits the mark on the feelings of confusion where you're wondering why this is happening to you, why you can't just be happy, and also the blame that you might pile upon yourself for not being able to just snap out of it and go back to being happy.
If you're a reader that has not had to deal with depression in the past, then this one might not connect to you the same way, however I do think it could help shed some insight as to how others around you could be feeling. Especially since it touches on the point as to how you never really know what a person is feeling on the inside — just because someone is always smiling doesn't mean that they're actually okay.
For those looking for a short, emotional read, this might be a good choice for you. But I would caution that if you're not in a good place mentally, maybe put it on the shelf and come back at a later date.
(Thank you to BooksGoSocial for providing an advance review copy for free via NetGalley! I am leaving this review voluntarily and all opinions are my own.)
Written with a stream of consciousness style, the story is revealed to us through the journal entries of a young woman that is very clearly suffering from depression (and perhaps some anxiety as well). The writing style is overall rather simple, making it technically easy to read — however this book really packs a punch emotionally. "Beyond Zero" proves that you don't need a bunch of fancy words or metaphors to convey strong emotions, you just have to be open and honest.
For readers who have personal experience with depression, this will likely be a relatable story. I personally found it to very accurately portray thoughts that I myself had when I was at my worst with depression in the past (especially during my school years). It really hits the mark on the feelings of confusion where you're wondering why this is happening to you, why you can't just be happy, and also the blame that you might pile upon yourself for not being able to just snap out of it and go back to being happy.
If you're a reader that has not had to deal with depression in the past, then this one might not connect to you the same way, however I do think it could help shed some insight as to how others around you could be feeling. Especially since it touches on the point as to how you never really know what a person is feeling on the inside — just because someone is always smiling doesn't mean that they're actually okay.
For those looking for a short, emotional read, this might be a good choice for you. But I would caution that if you're not in a good place mentally, maybe put it on the shelf and come back at a later date.
(Thank you to BooksGoSocial for providing an advance review copy for free via NetGalley! I am leaving this review voluntarily and all opinions are my own.)
October 28, 2025
Thank you so much to the publisher for the e-arc
4 stars!
Reading this hit hard and made me think more about myself and my own struggle with mental health.
It was different to read such something that felt so close to my own thoughts and feelings. The last note at the end is what broke me. And thank you for it.
4 stars!
Reading this hit hard and made me think more about myself and my own struggle with mental health.
It was different to read such something that felt so close to my own thoughts and feelings. The last note at the end is what broke me. And thank you for it.
September 15, 2025
this is a book for all the girls who spent their childhood thinking they were destined for greatness and their teenage years feeling like the world was ending because they realised they weren’t.
the entire novel is told in the format of journal entries, but the level of detail and style of writing makes it feel more like a collection of memories or stream of consciousness.
everything is described exactly as it is while still requiring you to read between the lines lest you miss something important. i actually wish i had a physical copy because i know i would’ve had a better experience if i had the freedom to scribble my thoughts in the margins.
it carries on a bit and the timeline is a little confusing, but i forgive it because the voice of the character is so strong that it makes it make sense. like, it really does sound like it was written by a teenage girl who is going through all these things in real time and jumping from feeling to feeling with no transition in between. i almost felt as if i was reading something i shouldn’t — like it was really someone’s personal diary. i think a lot of people are going to relate to lily, because i definitely did.
that being said, i feel like the ending left a lot to be desired and i left the book with a slightly sour taste in my mouth. it was a good foundation, i just wanted more.
(netgalley reviewer)
the entire novel is told in the format of journal entries, but the level of detail and style of writing makes it feel more like a collection of memories or stream of consciousness.
everything is described exactly as it is while still requiring you to read between the lines lest you miss something important. i actually wish i had a physical copy because i know i would’ve had a better experience if i had the freedom to scribble my thoughts in the margins.
it carries on a bit and the timeline is a little confusing, but i forgive it because the voice of the character is so strong that it makes it make sense. like, it really does sound like it was written by a teenage girl who is going through all these things in real time and jumping from feeling to feeling with no transition in between. i almost felt as if i was reading something i shouldn’t — like it was really someone’s personal diary. i think a lot of people are going to relate to lily, because i definitely did.
that being said, i feel like the ending left a lot to be desired and i left the book with a slightly sour taste in my mouth. it was a good foundation, i just wanted more.
(netgalley reviewer)
September 30, 2025
nothing's heavier than the silence of trying
There's so much I want to say about this book. I expected to see the weight of emotions, the heaviness of a girl's story just trying to get by. I didn't expect to experience it. To feel it on such a visceral level that I'd need to just--sit. Sit with it and breathe. Because not only was it strong, not only was it real--it was something I'm still living. My thoughts echoing back to me on this quick 152-page read. Maybe that's why I felt it so strongly.
It's a story told through flashes and streams. A nonlinear way of storytelling where we experience Lily's story rather than just being told it. Where we pick apart the secrets and the stories between the lines, all the hidden information subtly revealed through a girl just trying to learn how to exist in a world that's greyed out. Nothing mentioned outright as even she wants to put it aside, to hide it from everything and everyone. And even when she gets a sort of reprieve, it still feels like a lie.
And that's just a sentiment I know a little too well. Feeling it deep in the marrows of my bones.
Also, please don't expect a plot where there's a beginning, a climax, and an end. There's just a story, Lily's story. You start in the middle, and you follow as she tries. It's a story of a girl hoping to be heard. Just take notice.
10/10 will read again.
There's so much I want to say about this book. I expected to see the weight of emotions, the heaviness of a girl's story just trying to get by. I didn't expect to experience it. To feel it on such a visceral level that I'd need to just--sit. Sit with it and breathe. Because not only was it strong, not only was it real--it was something I'm still living. My thoughts echoing back to me on this quick 152-page read. Maybe that's why I felt it so strongly.
It's a story told through flashes and streams. A nonlinear way of storytelling where we experience Lily's story rather than just being told it. Where we pick apart the secrets and the stories between the lines, all the hidden information subtly revealed through a girl just trying to learn how to exist in a world that's greyed out. Nothing mentioned outright as even she wants to put it aside, to hide it from everything and everyone. And even when she gets a sort of reprieve, it still feels like a lie.
And that's just a sentiment I know a little too well. Feeling it deep in the marrows of my bones.
Also, please don't expect a plot where there's a beginning, a climax, and an end. There's just a story, Lily's story. You start in the middle, and you follow as she tries. It's a story of a girl hoping to be heard. Just take notice.
10/10 will read again.
September 22, 2025
Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC! This review is voluntary, and all opinions are my own.
Beyond Zero was a short read, coming in at 151 pages, but it definitely wasn’t an easy read. Readers who struggle with mental health should definitely pay mind to the content warnings in the beginning of the book, as the content does get quite heavy.
The story is told through a series of diary entries by our main character Lily. The writing feels very real and raw; as though these could be diary entries from an actual teenage girl going through grief, loss, abuse and the decline of their mental health as a direct result.
The book was well written, but because of it being written as a series of diary/journal entries, there wasn’t a real ‘plot’ per se. At times it was difficult to follow, again due to the writing style. The end also felt lacklustre for me.
Overall, I would give this book 2.25 stars.
Beyond Zero was a short read, coming in at 151 pages, but it definitely wasn’t an easy read. Readers who struggle with mental health should definitely pay mind to the content warnings in the beginning of the book, as the content does get quite heavy.
The story is told through a series of diary entries by our main character Lily. The writing feels very real and raw; as though these could be diary entries from an actual teenage girl going through grief, loss, abuse and the decline of their mental health as a direct result.
The book was well written, but because of it being written as a series of diary/journal entries, there wasn’t a real ‘plot’ per se. At times it was difficult to follow, again due to the writing style. The end also felt lacklustre for me.
Overall, I would give this book 2.25 stars.
September 23, 2025
As someone who has struggled, this book was both triggering and healing. Written in a poetic stream of consciousness, Beyond Zero touched a part of me that was deeply hidden and very visible at the same time.
Lily is a student, who is struggling with depression. She isolates herself from friends and family and sometimes spends days in bed or on the couch, just staring at the wall. I think she gives a perfect insight in how someone with depression and suicidal thoughts thinks and tries to survive through the worst of it.
Definitely check your triggers before reading Beyond Zero. But if you are brave enough to read about someone struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts, as someone who has been through it, it might heal a part of you you didn't know needed healing or know how to heal it.
Thank you NetGally for the eARC.
Lily is a student, who is struggling with depression. She isolates herself from friends and family and sometimes spends days in bed or on the couch, just staring at the wall. I think she gives a perfect insight in how someone with depression and suicidal thoughts thinks and tries to survive through the worst of it.
Definitely check your triggers before reading Beyond Zero. But if you are brave enough to read about someone struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts, as someone who has been through it, it might heal a part of you you didn't know needed healing or know how to heal it.
Thank you NetGally for the eARC.
October 17, 2025
This book reads like a stream of consiousness, a reality lived from underwater, on a difficult path. An inner world of melancholy, anxiety, depression and pain. The plot is loose & not important as it is the feelings, emotional landscape and thoughts that we twist, turn and wade through it while we are up to our necks.
I liked the honesty in this book, you could really feel how you can get stuck in your thoughts and grasping for a future which might never arrive or you end up sleeping through. While the heaviness of thought is hard at times it makes you realise that we are not alone in what we go through, it's ok to not be ok and sometimes just breathing the next breath is enough to break though and move beyond zero.
I liked the honesty in this book, you could really feel how you can get stuck in your thoughts and grasping for a future which might never arrive or you end up sleeping through. While the heaviness of thought is hard at times it makes you realise that we are not alone in what we go through, it's ok to not be ok and sometimes just breathing the next breath is enough to break though and move beyond zero.
November 27, 2025
Beyond Zero is a quiet, aching descent into a mind that’s grown too used to silence. The book reads like a confession whispered through pages heavy, still, and deeply human. The author captures that numbing kind of sorrow that doesn’t explode, but erodes. The fragmented, journal like structure makes the grief feel intimate, almost intrusive, and the minimalism in the prose gives every line extra weight. It’s the kind of story that lingers not because of dramatic twists, but because of how honestly it portrays the slow fading of a person who was once so much more than her pain. Bleak, tender, and haunting.
September 20, 2025
This is a very heart wrenching account of trauma and abuse. Please read the trigger warnings. It was a little difficult at first to understand what was going on but once you get into it and realize it’s journalistic entries it makes more sense. I think the raw emotions were a little hard to read but it gives a deep understanding of the horrific effects of abuse. The ending wasn’t very great for me and it’s not my normal type of read but it was an okay read.
September 28, 2025
intense, raw, very diary-like stream of conscious book with some intense vibes. 5 stars. tysm for the arc.
September 14, 2025
Thank you to NetGalley for the ARC.
This book, I feel a lot of burned out gifted kids can relate to. Lily, honey I just want to wrap my arms around you and tell you that everything is ok.
The writing was gorgeous, and the way someone with depression, insomnia, and trauma was depicted was very very understandable. This is a book that certainly can be triggering for some, but I guess that’s the whole point.
The ending was very open-ended. Did Lily leave? Did she stay? Who emailed her? So many questions!
But I enjoyed this a lot. Honored to have been the first review!
This book, I feel a lot of burned out gifted kids can relate to. Lily, honey I just want to wrap my arms around you and tell you that everything is ok.
The writing was gorgeous, and the way someone with depression, insomnia, and trauma was depicted was very very understandable. This is a book that certainly can be triggering for some, but I guess that’s the whole point.
The ending was very open-ended. Did Lily leave? Did she stay? Who emailed her? So many questions!
But I enjoyed this a lot. Honored to have been the first review!
October 28, 2025
Thank you NetGalley for the ARC.
TW: emotional distress, trauma, mental health struggles, and sui/ci/dal thoughts.
Oof... It's a short book, but it's definitely not easy to read. Please read the trigger warning before starting to read this book.
The writing feels poetic, and the single sentence makes it seem more like Lily's journal than a standard piece of fiction. Her words express pain, sorrow, and hopelessness. Reading this book felt like going through a journal written by a burned-out, desolate, gifted student trying to get through life, slowly losing her last spark of wanting to live. The feeling of being depressed, anxious, and isolated is very relatable and understandable.
While the author successfully gives a very intimate and introspective look at the characters' journeys, I think the book can be beneficial if there is a little bit more context rather than just a stream of consciousness (but, I guess that's the whole point of this book?). I believe that structuring the storyline with chapters and incorporating streams of thought will enhance the book's enjoyment. But, again, maybe this wasn't the author's intention.
Still, I enjoy reading this book. The book is worth a look if you enjoy stories with a melancholy and gloomy atmosphere. It may also appeal to those who appreciate narratives focusing primarily on a character's introspection rather than following a traditional plot-driven approach. It reads more like an intimate and unfiltered chronicle of the protagonist's inner world.
TW: emotional distress, trauma, mental health struggles, and sui/ci/dal thoughts.
Oof... It's a short book, but it's definitely not easy to read. Please read the trigger warning before starting to read this book.
The writing feels poetic, and the single sentence makes it seem more like Lily's journal than a standard piece of fiction. Her words express pain, sorrow, and hopelessness. Reading this book felt like going through a journal written by a burned-out, desolate, gifted student trying to get through life, slowly losing her last spark of wanting to live. The feeling of being depressed, anxious, and isolated is very relatable and understandable.
While the author successfully gives a very intimate and introspective look at the characters' journeys, I think the book can be beneficial if there is a little bit more context rather than just a stream of consciousness (but, I guess that's the whole point of this book?). I believe that structuring the storyline with chapters and incorporating streams of thought will enhance the book's enjoyment. But, again, maybe this wasn't the author's intention.
Still, I enjoy reading this book. The book is worth a look if you enjoy stories with a melancholy and gloomy atmosphere. It may also appeal to those who appreciate narratives focusing primarily on a character's introspection rather than following a traditional plot-driven approach. It reads more like an intimate and unfiltered chronicle of the protagonist's inner world.
Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews