Attuned and Attached: Heal Your Relationship with Yourself and Others to Create Lasting Connections

by Yolanda Renteria

A somatic psychotherapist's guide to building authentic and loving connections

Are your closest relationships often a source of stress rather than security?
Do you ever feel disconnected and lonely, even in the company of family and friends?

In Attuned and Attached, Yolanda Renteria invites you to take a deeper look at your emotional connections and discover what secure attachment and true intimacy actually feels like. With a practical programme of psychotherapy tools and accessible, safe ways of implementing somatic trauma healing, Yolanda will guide you to understand how your attachments have been formed, and how they are capable of being improved.

Begin a profound journey of self-discovery which has the potential to positively transform all of your relationships and interactions. You’ll learn how

Recognise signs of emotional disconnection in yourself and othersBreak patterns of intergenerational traumaDevelop skills to practise non-aggressive communicationCreate a safe and supportive communityThis book offers the ultimate roadmap to bringing more safety into all your relationships, so you can live a life filled with nourishing, peaceful and fulfilling connections.

Genres: Psychology

Kindle Edition

Expected publication May 28, 2026

Reviews

[Em · Rating 5 out of 5]

Attuned and Attached by Yolanda Renteria is an accessible and affirming guide for anyone who has ever wondered, Why do I keep reacting this way in relationships?

What I appreciated most is that you don’t have to be a therapist to understand this book. Renteria gently walks readers through how attachment wounds and internalized beliefs shape our self-concept and how that self-concept quietly drives how we show up with the people we love.

She names the self-protective impulses many of us carry (hyper-independence, perfectionism, people-pleasing, difficulty with accountability) and helps us see that these patterns aren’t character flaws they’re strategies that have helped us survive.

The strength of this book is its practicality. It doesn’t just explain disconnection; it offers tools to pause, reflect, set boundaries, repair ruptures, and move from reacting to relating. I especially appreciated her thoughtful inclusion of neurodiversity and how different nervous systems experience connection.

If you’ve ever said, “I had a good childhood, so why do I still feel emotionally distant?” this book offers you some important and insightful reflection points and a path toward safer, more honest relationships.

[Dadreadsanreviews (james) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thanks netgalley for the opportunity to review this work! Attuned and Attached is a great accessible book on crafting relationships though inner knowledge and communication skills. Renteria gives a wonderful introduction to attachment theory and emotional attunement, and she follows those threads throughout the book in describing how we can be in relationship with one another. Each chapter tackles an element of relationships, such as repair and giving the benefit of the doubt. Unfortunately, she does not tie attachment styles from the theoretical chapter to the practical advice, but the advice is framed in a very accessible way that resonates with real experiences. Overall, this is a great practical guide to crafting relationships from the perspective of self knowledge and emotional attunement.

[Megan · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've read a number of the books out there regarding relationships and attachment. Probably not all of them, but definitely most of them. I have to say this one is the best I've seen. Renteria combines examples, exercises, information, and data. This is accessible to anyone whether you have a detailed knowledge of attachment theory or no knowledge. The exercises are incredibly insightful. I appreciated that she does mention intersectionality. I would've loved more discussion of neurodivergency and how that interacts with attachment but the book can only be so long. I would highly recommend this.