Chiara Barzini speaks of relics. Her latest book, Aqua, is itself its own relic. A mix of memoir and history book renewing my belief in the magic real people can create. Edens out of empty space. The grandeur of human imagination and the eventual ruin the overly ambitious and greedy face. The ruin of empires.
From the preface, which sets the tone and grounds you in the present moment- the LA fires are raging, our government collapsing, how did we get here? Barzini is about to tell us.
There is also an underlying frustration women can never seem to escape strung throughout Aqua- a tale of the Los Angeles Aqueduct from its start in the Owens Valley to the very city in which it empties, that of how to be a mother, a writer, a person. The blame/shame game we are ceaselessly asked to play. She asks of herself how not to feel guilty for the things she wants as she leads us across Rome, New York, Los Angeles.
In the book, juxtaposed to the history of the making of the Aqueduct is the desire to turn her screenplay into a movie. She repeatedly seeks signs in the desert on her journey with a faith that something hopeful is coming despite the intuited sense of doom nipping at her heels. All these very real and relatable desires she splays against the backdrop of a city, a country that perhaps is no longer fit to hold them.
But a love for LA is also within these pages, respect and awe. For nature as it was and returns to despite human intervention and for the humans who have made the city what it is.
My biggest takeaway from the book might be our need for versatility in order for our survival. We cannot control the land. Something the mentioned Cahuillas knew but as we have always done, we push out the indigenous protectors of the land and with them the wisdom of how to survive in it.
Barzini deftly balances information about the building of Mulholland’s Aqueduct, Los Angeles itself, and her personal life in a way that made my heart ache. You can almost see in our history the exact moment it all goes wrong, but foresight and all that…
Furthermore the power of Water and all its symbolism is extremely striking. She nails the irony of cult leaders in the desert. The messiah tropes and granola girls. But she also utters a grave note on how this city is haunted by ghosts. Homes and mansions like sentient beings as they’re destroyed by fire and flood and the ever persistent echo of the Manson murders that changed the city forever.
Even more haunting and aching was her chapter on the Salton Sea, “The largest mistake seen from space.” What have we done? The image of her walking over not sand, but bones and the loss of the artist Shig “it takes a lot of mental balance to want to stay alive when everything around you is dying.” I remembered Lauren Cho. Bombay Beach, depression after Covid, our allergy to our own mortality…the mourning that takes place in the desert, a purification, a training, contemplation. My first trip to Joshua Tree came after my uncle’s passing from cancer. Barzini speaks of the ruins of Bombay Beach, the sewers of Rome how we, “walk over layers of bodies, over homes and tombs.”
Reading Aqua I found the same myth and Mysticism readers of Francesca Lia Block would find in her books (I highly suggest readers of House of Hearts to reach for Aqua next).
Further in the book Chiara speaks of the horrible ways the people in the desert, especially the Cahuilla Indians are being treated and our prison industrial system. Border patrol and the “dreams” we are being “sold” the atomic bomb practices and all the hidden things our country tries to bury.
Deeper in the book the dream of her screenplay becoming a film remains and as a writer myself the thought of: the most interesting thing has already been made whatever could my story add to it? Is hard felt. Your story matters! (Aside from Aqua being a poignant and mesmerizing mirage itself, Barzini’s Things That Happened Before the Earthquake is quintessential California adolescence reading.)
Aqua is also a girl’s road trip book. An adventure with childhood friends who stayed into adulthood and are her pillars throughout this journey. The importance of these female friendships in our lives.
The girls hit up Vegas and all her emptiness: Capitalism at its most failing. Empty stores and empty hearts.
This is still a story about “water diversion and corruption” “solar farms destroying the desert in the name of green energy” and I’m again reminded of yet another trip to Joshua Tree where I did not recognize the now large fields of turbines marring the land.
How do we atone for what we stole from the land?
The chapter on Manzanar and “California’s fucked up history. We have Native land with a Spanish name, diverted water, we have the imprisonment of Japanese people and now we have a national park” America finds ways to celebrate or historicize anything. Why can’t it just be labeled for what it is? A former concentration camp. Not to mention Shinoda’s Stingray Corvette becoming the most recognized as American thing designed by a citizen of this country said country threw in a prison camp.
And yet, “maybe it’s still possible to dream big in a world that’s falling apart.” Chiara helps us believe it is.
“We get greedy when our dreams threaten to slip away. We try to makes things fit even when they don’t. We become proud and overconfident.”
Barzini doesn’t get her movie and Mulholland became a recluse, shrinking away from his city and himself after the tragedy of the San Francisquito Dam collapse. You feel bad almost for the now broken man whose ambition and greed blackened a dream. The people of the Owens Valley sleep with oxygen tanks because the dust is so bad LA needs to divert the water back to where it was stolen just to cover the lake enough to quell the cancerous dust.
This all seems like a tragic anticlimactic end, but when asked, Barzini says she would “do it all again.” There have to be dreams of the future her friend Olivia Laing tells her. Just like the graffiti Chiara finds on her journey says: Soar crash heal repeat.