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Rainfall
What if grief doesn’t just take the ones you love but every piece of who you used to be?
She’s the girl unraveling under the weight of loss. He’s the boy who meets her where the shadows live.
Savannah doesn’t know if grief changed her—
or if it only stripped away the illusion that she was ever whole.
Since her mother’s death, she’s been unraveling. Pills blur the ache. Silence hides the truth. To her dad, she’s distant. To her friends, she’s fine. To Ethan, her boyfriend, she’s a ghost of the girl he remembers.
Then there’s Cole.
All sharp edges and quiet shadows, he doesn’t try to drag her back into the light. He meets her in the dark. He sees the pieces she can’t hold together—and, for a moment, she feels almost alive again.
But grief doesn’t let go easily.
And addiction doesn’t steal all at once. It waits in the cracks, takes root in the silence… until it becomes the only thing left to hold.
Rainfall is a raw and unforgettable new adult contemporary romance about grief, love, and the ways addiction can both numb and destroy. Savannah’s story is one of aching vulnerability, destructive choices, and the quiet hope that even in the darkest moments, connection can keep us breathing.
She’s the girl unraveling under the weight of loss. He’s the boy who meets her where the shadows live.
Savannah doesn’t know if grief changed her—
or if it only stripped away the illusion that she was ever whole.
Since her mother’s death, she’s been unraveling. Pills blur the ache. Silence hides the truth. To her dad, she’s distant. To her friends, she’s fine. To Ethan, her boyfriend, she’s a ghost of the girl he remembers.
Then there’s Cole.
All sharp edges and quiet shadows, he doesn’t try to drag her back into the light. He meets her in the dark. He sees the pieces she can’t hold together—and, for a moment, she feels almost alive again.
But grief doesn’t let go easily.
And addiction doesn’t steal all at once. It waits in the cracks, takes root in the silence… until it becomes the only thing left to hold.
Rainfall is a raw and unforgettable new adult contemporary romance about grief, love, and the ways addiction can both numb and destroy. Savannah’s story is one of aching vulnerability, destructive choices, and the quiet hope that even in the darkest moments, connection can keep us breathing.
- GenresRomanceDark Romance
533 pages, Kindle Edition
Published November 13, 2025
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 65 reviews
April 12, 2026
i was so angry at the fmc.
I had to remind myself she’s a 18 year old girl who just lost her mom and turned to substances to numb the pain. Her decisions made me so upset because nothing excuses cheating on her current boyfriend with the mmc and i really loved cole he honestly deserved better and the fmc was so stubborn to get help. Dont mistake my anger though, i did enjoy the read i just wanted to mother the fmc.
I had to remind myself she’s a 18 year old girl who just lost her mom and turned to substances to numb the pain. Her decisions made me so upset because nothing excuses cheating on her current boyfriend with the mmc and i really loved cole he honestly deserved better and the fmc was so stubborn to get help. Dont mistake my anger though, i did enjoy the read i just wanted to mother the fmc.
December 14, 2025
This is exactly why I love going into books blind. The love triangle alone had so many layers-showing the struggles of grief and addiction, and had me flipping the pages so fast. If you want a book to make you FEEL (deeply) then this is it. I am on my knees begging for book 2!
April 29, 2026
“𝙇𝙤𝙫𝙚’𝙨 𝙖 𝙨𝙩𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙩𝙧𝙖𝙙𝙞𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣. 𝙄𝙩 𝙡𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙨 𝙙𝙚𝙚𝙥 𝙞𝙣 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙗𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙨, 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙖 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙖𝙘𝙝𝙚, 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙘𝙖𝙣’𝙩 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙙𝙚𝙛𝙞𝙣𝙚 𝙞𝙩 𝙤𝙧 𝙝𝙤𝙡𝙙 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙤 𝙞𝙩. 𝙄𝙩’𝙨 𝙥𝙤𝙬𝙚𝙧𝙛𝙪𝙡—𝙩𝙤𝙤 𝙥𝙤𝙬𝙚𝙧𝙛𝙪𝙡 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚𝙨. 𝙂𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙢𝙪𝙘𝙝 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙩𝙧𝙤𝙡 𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙩...𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙩 𝙞𝙨 𝙨𝙘𝙖𝙧𝙮.”
■ Addiction
■ Grief
■ Mental health rep
■ Love triangle
■ Emotional
■ Forbidden love
𝙄 𝙘𝙖𝙣’𝙩 𝙦𝙪𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙨𝙘𝙧𝙞𝙗𝙚 𝙞𝙩, 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙣𝙚𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣. 𝙄𝙩’𝙨 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙬𝙚’𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚𝙙 𝙗𝙮 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙞𝙣𝙫𝙞𝙨𝙞𝙗𝙡𝙚, 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙗𝙚𝙮𝙤𝙣𝙙 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙𝙨.
This book was raw, heavy and emotional. It was so much more than a romance, it was about the fallout when someone you love passes away. The grief. The mental health struggles. The substance abuse. How the addiction controlled the FMC’s entire life.
“𝙔𝙤𝙪’𝙧𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙢𝙮 𝙛𝙖𝙫𝙤𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙥𝙞𝙚𝙘𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙘𝙝𝙤𝙘𝙤𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙚, 𝙎𝙖𝙫. 𝘼𝙡𝙬𝙖𝙮𝙨 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙗𝙚.”
Savannah is coming to terms with her mother’s death. Her boyfriend expects her to move on and can’t understand why she isn’t herself. Her relationship doesn’t feel right anymore and then, she meets Cole…
He loves her so much. She is so broken and she is still everything to him. He always shows up for her.
I can’t wait to continue this series!
■ Addiction
■ Grief
■ Mental health rep
■ Love triangle
■ Emotional
■ Forbidden love
𝙄 𝙘𝙖𝙣’𝙩 𝙦𝙪𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙨𝙘𝙧𝙞𝙗𝙚 𝙞𝙩, 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙣𝙚𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣. 𝙄𝙩’𝙨 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙬𝙚’𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚𝙙 𝙗𝙮 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙞𝙣𝙫𝙞𝙨𝙞𝙗𝙡𝙚, 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙗𝙚𝙮𝙤𝙣𝙙 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙𝙨.
This book was raw, heavy and emotional. It was so much more than a romance, it was about the fallout when someone you love passes away. The grief. The mental health struggles. The substance abuse. How the addiction controlled the FMC’s entire life.
“𝙔𝙤𝙪’𝙧𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙢𝙮 𝙛𝙖𝙫𝙤𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙥𝙞𝙚𝙘𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙘𝙝𝙤𝙘𝙤𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙚, 𝙎𝙖𝙫. 𝘼𝙡𝙬𝙖𝙮𝙨 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙗𝙚.”
Savannah is coming to terms with her mother’s death. Her boyfriend expects her to move on and can’t understand why she isn’t herself. Her relationship doesn’t feel right anymore and then, she meets Cole…
He loves her so much. She is so broken and she is still everything to him. He always shows up for her.
I can’t wait to continue this series!
November 10, 2025
The suffocating silence of grief, intensified by addiction and mental health struggles, can leave one feeling isolated, even in the presence of love. Following her mother's death, Savannah became a shadow of her former self, unrecognizable to those around her, including her boyfriend.
The period of grief a slow healing process only numb and destroy until it’s the only thing to hold on to.
I considered giving up on this book several times, but there were moments when I deeply connected with the protagonist, especially Savannah becoming a ghost after a tragic event. Although the story unfolded at a slower pace, I understood the reasoning behind it, as it mirrored the protagonist's heavy emotional and physical state.
The period of grief a slow healing process only numb and destroy until it’s the only thing to hold on to.
I considered giving up on this book several times, but there were moments when I deeply connected with the protagonist, especially Savannah becoming a ghost after a tragic event. Although the story unfolded at a slower pace, I understood the reasoning behind it, as it mirrored the protagonist's heavy emotional and physical state.
April 23, 2026
this book was good. it was written beautifully but it was very slow paced. i felt like i read a lot and it was kind of the same thing happening over and over but at the same time, i get it. i get why it was written like that. this book is very messy, emotional, and raw. we see the reality of someone dealing with trauma and dealing with addiction.
savannah… oh savannah. my heart hurts for her. she is so broken and sad. i didn’t agree with a lot of the choices she made but i understand them. i understand she did what she thought was right at the time. i understand she is struggling so so bad. i just want to give her a hug. 🫂
cole.. omg i love cole. he is perfect. he is just what savannah needed. he truly sees the real her and wants to save her so bad. he is trying so hard.
that ending? i kind of saw that coming but regardless i do want to continue this series. these babies deserve peace and happiness… and apparently book 2 we get cole’s POV so i need that asap!
savannah… oh savannah. my heart hurts for her. she is so broken and sad. i didn’t agree with a lot of the choices she made but i understand them. i understand she did what she thought was right at the time. i understand she is struggling so so bad. i just want to give her a hug. 🫂
cole.. omg i love cole. he is perfect. he is just what savannah needed. he truly sees the real her and wants to save her so bad. he is trying so hard.
that ending? i kind of saw that coming but regardless i do want to continue this series. these babies deserve peace and happiness… and apparently book 2 we get cole’s POV so i need that asap!
September 14, 2026
3.75 stars
this book was really interesting, emotional, and angsty, and I liked the female lead, savannah. I felt for savannah and her struggle with addiction. however, I think savannah and cole’s relationship moved way too fast. I was thrown off guard when they said “I love you” and started dating 50% into the first book of a trilogy. I did like their relationship, but I wish their relationship had more build up, which is why I can’t rate this book higher than 3.75 stars.
this book was really interesting, emotional, and angsty, and I liked the female lead, savannah. I felt for savannah and her struggle with addiction. however, I think savannah and cole’s relationship moved way too fast. I was thrown off guard when they said “I love you” and started dating 50% into the first book of a trilogy. I did like their relationship, but I wish their relationship had more build up, which is why I can’t rate this book higher than 3.75 stars.
August 12, 2026
“I know what that darkness can feel like.” His voice cracks again. “So if you ever forget how to hold yourself up, I’ll fucking carry you.”
“When I’m with you, it’s like I can finally breathe. Like maybe I’m not broken beyond repair. Maybe there’s still something left in me worth saving.”
I have been wanting to read this series for so long but was trying to hold off until closer to the release of book three... well now felt like the right time and man was it an emotional journey thus far.
First of all, I want to say thank you to Nikki for writing about topics that are not easy to navigate and doing it in a way that felt so raw and honest. The writing was easy to follow and very compelling. I was able to see it all happening in my head vividly. I am very impressed especially considering this is Nikki's debut novel.
Rainfall is centered around Savannah, the FMC, who has unfortunately lost a parent. She is in the throes of grief from the very start of this book, and it has heavily impacted her mental health. She is struggling to get through each day and has turned to substances to numb her mind. This leads her down a very dark and dangerous journey where these substances that once felt like were saving her are now trying to kill her.
A lot of this story in my opinion is character driven. Yes, things happen in the story but most of it is centered on Savannah and her struggling with her grief and how to navigate who she is now without her parent. Personally, I love character driven stories, but I felt like that was worth mentioning. I think Nikki does a fantastic job at letting the reader into Savannah’s head and truly feeling what it is like to go through grief, addiction, and mental health struggles. At times I found myself wanting to message my own parent and just tell them how much I loved them and imagining what losing them would feel like to me. It might sound silly, but I am 100% serious. That is how real it felt to me and how much I was able to connect with Savannah . I saw a lot of myself in her. Her mental health struggles and the need to use substances to cope is something I lived myself for so long. It was so tough being a bystander and not being able to jump into the book and help her myself.
Of course I can't not mention Cole, the MMC. Savannah has a boyfriend at the start of this book that is not Cole, but by chance Cole and Savannah meet shortly into this book and their chemistry was undeniable. Cole sees her in a way that her boyfriend does not and notices everything about her, most importantly her struggles and the pain she carries. He wants to help her, not fix or change her, but be there for her and see her be happy. He truly has the best intentions for her. He has his own struggles and has experienced some very difficult things, and I am glad we got a bit of that, and I really hope we get more in the next book. Cole is the perfect mix of everything. He's sweet, sexy, confident and so dang thoughtful. The way he loves Savannah and always shows up for her melts my heart.
With that being said, this story is messy and complicated. But most of all, it is real. I loved every moment of it. These characters are young adults and going through a lot of heavy stuff, especially Savannah, so you really have to have grace. I could never judge her for her choices, and I am rooting so hard for her.
Rainfall is single POV told by Savannah, but I am pretty sure book two, Where I Land, is dual POV, so we will get Cole's insight into everything which I am so ready for.
It was so hard watching Savannah spiral, and I was just waiting for something terrible to happen, but it was so necessary. Like they say, sometimes you have to reach rock bottom to finally work your way up. I am hopeful that Savannah will figure this out and I have faith that Cole will stick by her no matter how difficult it may be for them individually and their relationship. He is her person. Simple as that. It does break my heart thinking about how he must have felt watching Savannah go through all of this, especially with his past. I have a feeling his POV might wreck me even more so. But I also need it.
I will be immediately diving into Where I Land.
Also, I have to mention how much I have loved getting to meet all of the side characters. I cannot wait for Nate, Lily, Ty, Ryan and Jade's stories. I love this found family that Nikki has already built so far. While a lot of this is heavy, there are some fun and lighthearted moments interwoven throughout and I really enjoyed the bond this group has and hope we can get more of that and their individual stories.
“When I’m with you, it’s like I can finally breathe. Like maybe I’m not broken beyond repair. Maybe there’s still something left in me worth saving.”
I have been wanting to read this series for so long but was trying to hold off until closer to the release of book three... well now felt like the right time and man was it an emotional journey thus far.
First of all, I want to say thank you to Nikki for writing about topics that are not easy to navigate and doing it in a way that felt so raw and honest. The writing was easy to follow and very compelling. I was able to see it all happening in my head vividly. I am very impressed especially considering this is Nikki's debut novel.
Rainfall is centered around Savannah, the FMC, who has unfortunately lost a parent. She is in the throes of grief from the very start of this book, and it has heavily impacted her mental health. She is struggling to get through each day and has turned to substances to numb her mind. This leads her down a very dark and dangerous journey where these substances that once felt like were saving her are now trying to kill her.
A lot of this story in my opinion is character driven. Yes, things happen in the story but most of it is centered on Savannah and her struggling with her grief and how to navigate who she is now without her parent. Personally, I love character driven stories, but I felt like that was worth mentioning. I think Nikki does a fantastic job at letting the reader into Savannah’s head and truly feeling what it is like to go through grief, addiction, and mental health struggles. At times I found myself wanting to message my own parent and just tell them how much I loved them and imagining what losing them would feel like to me. It might sound silly, but I am 100% serious. That is how real it felt to me and how much I was able to connect with Savannah . I saw a lot of myself in her. Her mental health struggles and the need to use substances to cope is something I lived myself for so long. It was so tough being a bystander and not being able to jump into the book and help her myself.
Of course I can't not mention Cole, the MMC. Savannah has a boyfriend at the start of this book that is not Cole, but by chance Cole and Savannah meet shortly into this book and their chemistry was undeniable. Cole sees her in a way that her boyfriend does not and notices everything about her, most importantly her struggles and the pain she carries. He wants to help her, not fix or change her, but be there for her and see her be happy. He truly has the best intentions for her. He has his own struggles and has experienced some very difficult things, and I am glad we got a bit of that, and I really hope we get more in the next book. Cole is the perfect mix of everything. He's sweet, sexy, confident and so dang thoughtful. The way he loves Savannah and always shows up for her melts my heart.
With that being said, this story is messy and complicated. But most of all, it is real. I loved every moment of it. These characters are young adults and going through a lot of heavy stuff, especially Savannah, so you really have to have grace. I could never judge her for her choices, and I am rooting so hard for her.
Rainfall is single POV told by Savannah, but I am pretty sure book two, Where I Land, is dual POV, so we will get Cole's insight into everything which I am so ready for.
It was so hard watching Savannah spiral, and I was just waiting for something terrible to happen, but it was so necessary. Like they say, sometimes you have to reach rock bottom to finally work your way up. I am hopeful that Savannah will figure this out and I have faith that Cole will stick by her no matter how difficult it may be for them individually and their relationship. He is her person. Simple as that. It does break my heart thinking about how he must have felt watching Savannah go through all of this, especially with his past. I have a feeling his POV might wreck me even more so. But I also need it.
I will be immediately diving into Where I Land.
Also, I have to mention how much I have loved getting to meet all of the side characters. I cannot wait for Nate, Lily, Ty, Ryan and Jade's stories. I love this found family that Nikki has already built so far. While a lot of this is heavy, there are some fun and lighthearted moments interwoven throughout and I really enjoyed the bond this group has and hope we can get more of that and their individual stories.
August 7, 2026
Phew, I just finished and I’m a little overwhelmed.. I want to say so much but I don’t have enough/the right words for it .. so this review feels like I doesn’t do this book justice.. 🌧️
Please if you have triggers, check them before diving into Rainfall bc it could be too much if you‘re sensitive to themes like grief, addiction, mental health struggles, suicide (thoughts&description),..
This is one of the stories that will put you through all the emotions and will pull on your heartstrings like a violin.. 💔❤️🩹 and it’s just so beautifully written, I can’t believe it’s Nikki’s debut novel!
I cried throughout the whole book for various reasons but the last 10%!? Got me bawling my eyes out until I was finished.. 😭 Savannah & Come definitely have a piece of my heart now!❤️🩹
Sav and Cole found each other in a difficult stage in life and slowly fall in love; all the while Ethan, Savannah‘s boyfriend, want her to go back to „normal“ after the tragic death of her mom (R U kidding me!? 🤨).
Cole is her tower of strength, where she feels like she just can be. Even when she‘s drowning in grief and numbing herself. He‘s always there for her - unshakeable, never judging. He’s the perfect counterpart Savannah could‘ve ever ask for! ❤️🩹
But you feel and get glimpses, that he‘s struggling with something himself. So can’t wait to get to book 2!
It‘s so beautiful to see their good, almost carefree moments as a couple 🥺 but also get to see the reality of someone who‘s deep in grief, who no longer knows who she even is. and the addiction taking over and slowly destroying her and every little glimpse of light she has in n getting out of all the darkness.. 🌌
If you’re in search of a read that will most likely cause emotional damaged, tear your heart out and make you cry - I would highly recommend reading Rainfall!! 🌧️🥺
Please if you have triggers, check them before diving into Rainfall bc it could be too much if you‘re sensitive to themes like grief, addiction, mental health struggles, suicide (thoughts&description),..
This is one of the stories that will put you through all the emotions and will pull on your heartstrings like a violin.. 💔❤️🩹 and it’s just so beautifully written, I can’t believe it’s Nikki’s debut novel!
I cried throughout the whole book for various reasons but the last 10%!? Got me bawling my eyes out until I was finished.. 😭 Savannah & Come definitely have a piece of my heart now!❤️🩹
Sav and Cole found each other in a difficult stage in life and slowly fall in love; all the while Ethan, Savannah‘s boyfriend, want her to go back to „normal“ after the tragic death of her mom (R U kidding me!? 🤨).
Cole is her tower of strength, where she feels like she just can be. Even when she‘s drowning in grief and numbing herself. He‘s always there for her - unshakeable, never judging. He’s the perfect counterpart Savannah could‘ve ever ask for! ❤️🩹
But you feel and get glimpses, that he‘s struggling with something himself. So can’t wait to get to book 2!
It‘s so beautiful to see their good, almost carefree moments as a couple 🥺 but also get to see the reality of someone who‘s deep in grief, who no longer knows who she even is. and the addiction taking over and slowly destroying her and every little glimpse of light she has in n getting out of all the darkness.. 🌌
If you’re in search of a read that will most likely cause emotional damaged, tear your heart out and make you cry - I would highly recommend reading Rainfall!! 🌧️🥺
November 12, 2025
First and foremost: Be careful when reading this book... it contains mentions, thoughts, and description of suicide. Heavy themes of addiction that include drugs, smoking, and alcohol. Also loss of a loved one and the emotional weight of the grieving process.
This book pulled at every fiber of my being. It's painful and raw, exposing the multiple shades of grieving I think many of us hide from the eyes of others. Coping from an unexpected loss of my own, this book made me cry and highlighted emotions I didn't know I had.💔
Savannah's process of dealing with the pain of losing her mother was understandable in a sense that her and I are similar yet different. She refuses to feel anything because the pain is too much, and when the pain becomes too much for me, my mind wants to turn off and numb me out.
Reading about addiction is hard.
Savannah's struggles are no simple fix.
I had a hard time liking the MMC, Cole, even though he deeply loved her... he was kind of an enabler to her problems. Which I think was based out of fear of losing her.
Their connection was incredible. I loved that he was a constant solace for her, always there, always keeping her anchored when he could. He was the future she could have if she wanted.
It was a conflicting feeling, loving him and getting angry at the same time.
I was in a lot of feels🥹reading this.
Final thoughts...
Nikki captures grieving in a beautiful light albeit soul splitting way; I cried, A LOT😢
Cole is swoon worthy but I wanted to punch him a few times 👊
Savannah's journey is heartbreaking but spellbinding in a way you can't stop reading
Lily is the best friend we ALL WANT💗
Rating - 5⭐
Spice O' Meter - 🌶️🌶️.5
This book pulled at every fiber of my being. It's painful and raw, exposing the multiple shades of grieving I think many of us hide from the eyes of others. Coping from an unexpected loss of my own, this book made me cry and highlighted emotions I didn't know I had.💔
Savannah's process of dealing with the pain of losing her mother was understandable in a sense that her and I are similar yet different. She refuses to feel anything because the pain is too much, and when the pain becomes too much for me, my mind wants to turn off and numb me out.
Reading about addiction is hard.
Savannah's struggles are no simple fix.
I had a hard time liking the MMC, Cole, even though he deeply loved her... he was kind of an enabler to her problems. Which I think was based out of fear of losing her.
Their connection was incredible. I loved that he was a constant solace for her, always there, always keeping her anchored when he could. He was the future she could have if she wanted.
It was a conflicting feeling, loving him and getting angry at the same time.
I was in a lot of feels🥹reading this.
Final thoughts...
Nikki captures grieving in a beautiful light albeit soul splitting way; I cried, A LOT😢
Cole is swoon worthy but I wanted to punch him a few times 👊
Savannah's journey is heartbreaking but spellbinding in a way you can't stop reading
Lily is the best friend we ALL WANT💗
Rating - 5⭐
Spice O' Meter - 🌶️🌶️.5
November 1, 2025
✨ARC Review✨
This book is so so so much more than a romance. This book is about struggling with addiction and how it takes over your life completely.
Savanah is trying to cope with the death of her mom and feels alone. Her boyfriend and friends are wanting her to just move on and be who she used to be again. When she meets Cole she finally feels like she has an anchor in her life and someone who understands her grief and who she is. Even with someone finally by her side, she turns to pills and alcohol to numb everything else in her mind.
As hard as this was to read, I loved it. Savannah was frustrating at first with her back and forth between Ethan and Cole, but letting go of Ethan in her mind, would be letting go of her past. Once she lets go and starts moving towards the future, she realizes that she’s in over her head after watching someone OD at a friend’s house. The ending of this story is so heartbreaking, especially since it’s raw and sadly how the disease of addiction can turn.
Thank you so much Nikki Jimenez for letting me read Savannah’s story. I know, it’s Cole’s story too, but Savannah’s is one everyone should know. Also, thanks for the tears. You owe me for my therapy bill.
This book is so so so much more than a romance. This book is about struggling with addiction and how it takes over your life completely.
Savanah is trying to cope with the death of her mom and feels alone. Her boyfriend and friends are wanting her to just move on and be who she used to be again. When she meets Cole she finally feels like she has an anchor in her life and someone who understands her grief and who she is. Even with someone finally by her side, she turns to pills and alcohol to numb everything else in her mind.
As hard as this was to read, I loved it. Savannah was frustrating at first with her back and forth between Ethan and Cole, but letting go of Ethan in her mind, would be letting go of her past. Once she lets go and starts moving towards the future, she realizes that she’s in over her head after watching someone OD at a friend’s house. The ending of this story is so heartbreaking, especially since it’s raw and sadly how the disease of addiction can turn.
Thank you so much Nikki Jimenez for letting me read Savannah’s story. I know, it’s Cole’s story too, but Savannah’s is one everyone should know. Also, thanks for the tears. You owe me for my therapy bill.
November 8, 2025
•Engaging, raw and real - an incredible debut•
My 5 star review of Rainfall by Nikki Jimenez
I am stunned in the best way:
“I know what that darkness can feel like.” His voice cracks again. “So if you ever forget how to hold yourself up, I’ll fucking carry you.”
Rainfall is a powerful and beautiful debut, with a gripping, well-developed plot, beautiful description of the settings and smooth, engaging writing style.
This book hollowed out the deepest part of my soul, digging up emotions and pulling them to the surface. Yes, there is romance, and it is so good: hard-hitting spice full of teenage yearning. But what truly hit me was the deep understanding of grief and addiction the author portrays through the characters and their experiences. I felt the black hole of grief and the gritty itch of the drugs pulling at Savannah, the FMC. It was devastating to feel how this affected her and shaped her relationships with Ethan and Cole. This book carved out a little pit deep in my heart, making it swell with the love between Savannah and Cole and then leaving it emptied out as Savannah battled with her demons.
This was one of those books that will stick with me for a long time, and I am so thankful the author shared an ARC of this novel with me.
My 5 star review of Rainfall by Nikki Jimenez
I am stunned in the best way:
“I know what that darkness can feel like.” His voice cracks again. “So if you ever forget how to hold yourself up, I’ll fucking carry you.”
Rainfall is a powerful and beautiful debut, with a gripping, well-developed plot, beautiful description of the settings and smooth, engaging writing style.
This book hollowed out the deepest part of my soul, digging up emotions and pulling them to the surface. Yes, there is romance, and it is so good: hard-hitting spice full of teenage yearning. But what truly hit me was the deep understanding of grief and addiction the author portrays through the characters and their experiences. I felt the black hole of grief and the gritty itch of the drugs pulling at Savannah, the FMC. It was devastating to feel how this affected her and shaped her relationships with Ethan and Cole. This book carved out a little pit deep in my heart, making it swell with the love between Savannah and Cole and then leaving it emptied out as Savannah battled with her demons.
This was one of those books that will stick with me for a long time, and I am so thankful the author shared an ARC of this novel with me.
November 1, 2025
3.5 absolute GUT WRENCHING stars🌟. mrs nikki jimenez, this was SUCH an incredible debut. i was pulled RIGHT in and finished “Rainfall” in a day (like literally in two sittings). the writing was absolutely beautiful and so easy to digest, despite the heavy story being told. & i just FELT so many emotions. i laughed, i swooned, i cried (…and sobbed). it was perfect.
the story was so addictive (haha… ha) and i loved reading about the journey, both emotionally and physically, our mcs went through. they endured the struggles of addiction and jimenez truly explores the toll it has on not only the addict but the people around them. this was so much more than your typical romance book &, may i say, very reminiscent of joey and aoife’s story (in the BEST way possible).
savannah and cole’s love is truly palpable and their story was so complex, emotional, and sometimes frustrating (but like a good way?!). savannah, our fmc, is such a complicated character & one of those that, although you wont agree with all of the decisions she makes, you cant help but love and adore her completely. and then theres cole!!! the absolute definition of a perfectly broody mmc who only has a soft spot for the fmc (pls, i love them). they mesh so perfectly and you can tell that they were without a doubt made for each other.
overall, savannah (and cole’s) story is one that is so raw, so real, and so devastating. a story of grief and addiction but also of love and perseverance. a story that everyone should read, because for some people its reality.
& can i say the ending was absolutely HEARTBREAKING??? i honestly havent stopped thinking about it since. crossing my fingers that a sequel will be announced soon… because there will be one… right… right? (im just trying to cope)
a huge thank you to Nikki Jimenez for the eArc in exchange for my honest review! i’m so eternally grateful for the opportunity to have read and reviewed “Rainfall” early!💖
the story was so addictive (haha… ha) and i loved reading about the journey, both emotionally and physically, our mcs went through. they endured the struggles of addiction and jimenez truly explores the toll it has on not only the addict but the people around them. this was so much more than your typical romance book &, may i say, very reminiscent of joey and aoife’s story (in the BEST way possible).
savannah and cole’s love is truly palpable and their story was so complex, emotional, and sometimes frustrating (but like a good way?!). savannah, our fmc, is such a complicated character & one of those that, although you wont agree with all of the decisions she makes, you cant help but love and adore her completely. and then theres cole!!! the absolute definition of a perfectly broody mmc who only has a soft spot for the fmc (pls, i love them). they mesh so perfectly and you can tell that they were without a doubt made for each other.
overall, savannah (and cole’s) story is one that is so raw, so real, and so devastating. a story of grief and addiction but also of love and perseverance. a story that everyone should read, because for some people its reality.
& can i say the ending was absolutely HEARTBREAKING??? i honestly havent stopped thinking about it since. crossing my fingers that a sequel will be announced soon… because there will be one… right… right? (im just trying to cope)
a huge thank you to Nikki Jimenez for the eArc in exchange for my honest review! i’m so eternally grateful for the opportunity to have read and reviewed “Rainfall” early!💖
November 10, 2025
✨ARC READ✨
I’ve been holding off on writing a review because idk how to approach it and put it into words. As I told Nikki in a DM, “I have all the words but also not enough…”. This was a heavy topic to read about for many reasons but the love story behind it and its selflessness, gahhh my gosh!!!! Makes you fall hard for Cole and truly feel for Savannah. She’s hardheaded and so stubborn you want to shake her most time but I truly enjoyed this book.
Grief is hard. It’s messy, it’s ugly, it pulls you through vicious cycles of trying to find yourself again before the trauma but you can’t seem to get it right. You’re not yourself anymore so how do you find that person again? Grief hardens you in ways you can’t verbally explain and ways most people don’t understand. Grief ultimately leads Savannah down a path of self destruction in which she cannot pull herself from. Until she meets Cole. Cole became her anchor, her peace from all the turbulence. But was Cole enough?
Nikki, you tore my heart into pieces 😩🩶
I’ve been holding off on writing a review because idk how to approach it and put it into words. As I told Nikki in a DM, “I have all the words but also not enough…”. This was a heavy topic to read about for many reasons but the love story behind it and its selflessness, gahhh my gosh!!!! Makes you fall hard for Cole and truly feel for Savannah. She’s hardheaded and so stubborn you want to shake her most time but I truly enjoyed this book.
Grief is hard. It’s messy, it’s ugly, it pulls you through vicious cycles of trying to find yourself again before the trauma but you can’t seem to get it right. You’re not yourself anymore so how do you find that person again? Grief hardens you in ways you can’t verbally explain and ways most people don’t understand. Grief ultimately leads Savannah down a path of self destruction in which she cannot pull herself from. Until she meets Cole. Cole became her anchor, her peace from all the turbulence. But was Cole enough?
Nikki, you tore my heart into pieces 😩🩶
November 9, 2025
Rainfall by Nikki Jimenez is a raw and emotional journey that grips you from the very first page. It’s one of those stories that tugs relentlessly at your heartstrings, pulling you deeper into the FMC’s world of grief, loss, and the fragile hope for healing. I love when a book makes you feel so much that you can’t help but keep turning the pages, praying that the main character will finally find her happiness and peace.
What made this story hit even harder for me was how relatable the FMC’s grief and self-destruction felt. Her pain, her coping, her quiet strength—it all resonated in such a personal and gut-wrenching way. Nikki Jimenez captures raw emotion so beautifully that you can’t help but feel every ounce of it right alongside the character.
Rainfall isn’t just a story—it’s an experience. Heartbreaking, hopeful, and achingly human. Absolutely loved this book.
What made this story hit even harder for me was how relatable the FMC’s grief and self-destruction felt. Her pain, her coping, her quiet strength—it all resonated in such a personal and gut-wrenching way. Nikki Jimenez captures raw emotion so beautifully that you can’t help but feel every ounce of it right alongside the character.
Rainfall isn’t just a story—it’s an experience. Heartbreaking, hopeful, and achingly human. Absolutely loved this book.
November 15, 2025
ARC REVIEW ***
I just finished, I am absolutely wrecked.
This book was relatable in so many ways. Though this book is fiction, this sadly is the painful reality for many. I could appreciate the accurate depictions of the themes throughout the story.
Through this story, you see that grief is complex and healing isn’t linear.
You see many times that two very different things can be true at the same time.
You see the complexity of addiction at various stages and the way in which Cole’s love was a reflection of a life raft but even love sometimes isn’t enough. Addiction doesn’t discriminate and it hurt everyone in its path.
Thank you Nikki Jimenez for giving me the opportunity to read this book! This was a heavy story but absolutely worth the read.
I just finished, I am absolutely wrecked.
This book was relatable in so many ways. Though this book is fiction, this sadly is the painful reality for many. I could appreciate the accurate depictions of the themes throughout the story.
Through this story, you see that grief is complex and healing isn’t linear.
You see many times that two very different things can be true at the same time.
You see the complexity of addiction at various stages and the way in which Cole’s love was a reflection of a life raft but even love sometimes isn’t enough. Addiction doesn’t discriminate and it hurt everyone in its path.
Thank you Nikki Jimenez for giving me the opportunity to read this book! This was a heavy story but absolutely worth the read.
November 6, 2025
This entire book.
Savannah's entire world gets flipped over when her mother dies.
Her boyfriend expects her to just get over it. one night to happens to stumble into Cole.
Cole silences everything for her, makes her feel okay as broken as she is.
She also stumbled into pills, her addiction fighting a war inside of her.
Can Cole be enough for her?
the ending literally had me flipping back and forth on my Kindle double checking if it was really the end.
Savannah's entire world gets flipped over when her mother dies.
Her boyfriend expects her to just get over it. one night to happens to stumble into Cole.
Cole silences everything for her, makes her feel okay as broken as she is.
She also stumbled into pills, her addiction fighting a war inside of her.
Can Cole be enough for her?
the ending literally had me flipping back and forth on my Kindle double checking if it was really the end.
November 11, 2025
This book was amazing! I didn't fully know what it was about when I signed up for it, but it was way better than I thought it was going to be! Although I can't relate to most of Savannah's struggles, I do know the pain of losing a loved one. I love how no matter what, Cole loved her through all of it.
The ending left me with a lot of questions, but I still recommend it to anyone willing to read it!
The ending left me with a lot of questions, but I still recommend it to anyone willing to read it!
November 8, 2025
Love this book so so much. It had real raw emotions. Had me crying. I felt the pain for what the fmc was going through.
February 15, 2026
4.5 rounded up⭐️
I’ll be back with words😭 just know I love this with my whole chest
I’ll be back with words😭 just know I love this with my whole chest
March 18, 2026
Until I can gather all my emotions for a review just know…. ALL THE STARS 😩😭
Did Not Finish
June 29, 2026this was so boring
November 5, 2025
ARC Review 🥰
Oh. My. God. This book is raw, vulnerable, heartbreaking yet comforting and just UGH.
I love when I’m excited about an ARC and it pulls through.
Oh. My. God. This book is raw, vulnerable, heartbreaking yet comforting and just UGH.
I love when I’m excited about an ARC and it pulls through.
October 25, 2025
Rainfall By Nikki Jimenez absolutely destroyed me, Savannahs journey and addiction is a hard read but couldn’t stop and the love that Cole has for her continuously is so perfect. Left me screaming at my kindle but still so great.
October 15, 2025
This book is more than just a love story—it’s a raw, emotional journey through grief, loss, and the slow, often painful process of healing. the ending tho….unreal
December 5, 2025
3 stars
I wanted to love this. I started off loving it.
It’s real, it’s raw it gets addiction, grief, and love in a way that hits at first. But as the story went on, it started to feel repetitive. The same parties, the same inner monologues, the same cycle of hiding and spiraling over and over again. It stopped moving. As someone who grew up in a home surrounded by addiction who’s lost best friends to it, who’s lived in the chaos this just didn’t hit as hard as I hoped. It could’ve, but it didn’t.
The ending confused me. Is it a cliffhanger? Did she die? It’s just left… blank. And after chapters of that same back & forth, with no real growth or shift, it felt like the story didn’t evolve. It just circled.
I also expected it to go deeper. Yes, her father works a lot, but he loves her. He’s there. And there are people around her who clearly see she’s struggling her boyfriend, his mom (a nurse), her best friend Lilly who’s constantly worried but no one does anything they just watch her continuously take pills and get worse. That’s not what happens in real life. No one reaches out. No one calls for help. That’s not how it goes when you’re 18 and surrounded by adults and friends who love you. Somebody steps in. Somebody says enough. Especially when it’s this obvious especially with opiates and benzos & especially when your boyfriend’s mom is a ER nurse and you’re at her house every day.
I get that addiction is complicated. I’ve lived it. But even in the darkest stories, there’s usually a moment when someone tries. I wish this book had given us that.
I wanted to love this. I started off loving it.
It’s real, it’s raw it gets addiction, grief, and love in a way that hits at first. But as the story went on, it started to feel repetitive. The same parties, the same inner monologues, the same cycle of hiding and spiraling over and over again. It stopped moving. As someone who grew up in a home surrounded by addiction who’s lost best friends to it, who’s lived in the chaos this just didn’t hit as hard as I hoped. It could’ve, but it didn’t.
The ending confused me. Is it a cliffhanger? Did she die? It’s just left… blank. And after chapters of that same back & forth, with no real growth or shift, it felt like the story didn’t evolve. It just circled.
I also expected it to go deeper. Yes, her father works a lot, but he loves her. He’s there. And there are people around her who clearly see she’s struggling her boyfriend, his mom (a nurse), her best friend Lilly who’s constantly worried but no one does anything they just watch her continuously take pills and get worse. That’s not what happens in real life. No one reaches out. No one calls for help. That’s not how it goes when you’re 18 and surrounded by adults and friends who love you. Somebody steps in. Somebody says enough. Especially when it’s this obvious especially with opiates and benzos & especially when your boyfriend’s mom is a ER nurse and you’re at her house every day.
I get that addiction is complicated. I’ve lived it. But even in the darkest stories, there’s usually a moment when someone tries. I wish this book had given us that.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
January 5, 2026
Rainfall was my first read of 2026, and I picked it up after seeing it on BookTok and feeling like it would be a heavy, emotional read right up my alley, I immediately wanted to read it. Overall, I did enjoy this book, but it was definitely one of those reads that hits more emotionally than plot-wise for me.
This story deals with some really heavy topics (loss, grief, and addiction)… and the beginning especially hit very close to home for me. I lost my mom right after I turned 20 and the way Savannah’s grief over losing her mother was written felt incredibly real. Losing a mom in your young adult years changes you in ways that are hard to put into words, and this book captured that feeling in such a raw, honest way. I also connected with Savannah’s relationship and the way she slowly lost parts of herself after losing her mom. While my life took a different path than hers, I could still see how and why things unfolded the way they did for her.
As the story went on, though, the pacing started to slow for me, and it began to drag a bit. Some moments felt repetitive, and I kept waiting for something more to happen. That said, I can also see how that repetition may have been intentional, especially when portraying the cycle of addiction… it’s not pretty or fast-moving, and I imagine it often feels stuck on repeat.
Despite that, I still liked this book overall and would recommend it to the right reader, especially if you’re looking for something emotional and reflective. And I have to say, I absolutely adored Cole, he was definitely a standout for me.
This story deals with some really heavy topics (loss, grief, and addiction)… and the beginning especially hit very close to home for me. I lost my mom right after I turned 20 and the way Savannah’s grief over losing her mother was written felt incredibly real. Losing a mom in your young adult years changes you in ways that are hard to put into words, and this book captured that feeling in such a raw, honest way. I also connected with Savannah’s relationship and the way she slowly lost parts of herself after losing her mom. While my life took a different path than hers, I could still see how and why things unfolded the way they did for her.
As the story went on, though, the pacing started to slow for me, and it began to drag a bit. Some moments felt repetitive, and I kept waiting for something more to happen. That said, I can also see how that repetition may have been intentional, especially when portraying the cycle of addiction… it’s not pretty or fast-moving, and I imagine it often feels stuck on repeat.
Despite that, I still liked this book overall and would recommend it to the right reader, especially if you’re looking for something emotional and reflective. And I have to say, I absolutely adored Cole, he was definitely a standout for me.
February 21, 2026
It’s been a while since I’ve been angry with characters in a book. Relating to this book in so many ways hits hard. Loving someone with an addiction drains you, mentally and emotionally.
This story sucked me in immediately. Not because I knew the grief of losing a parent, but because of how much I related to Cole. This story frustrated me, made me laugh, and broke my heart.
Throughout the story I wanted to shake and smack Savannah. Screaming at her not to or don’t or get your shit together.
I don’t think I’ve read a book that made me like the boyfriend as much as I liked the new love interest. And poor Ethan. It’s easy as someone who’s never dealt with addiction or loss to wish for things to be the way they once were. But grief and addiction changes a person. As much as he tried he wasn’t enough. Wasn’t what Savannah needed in those moments.
But Cole, having experienced some of what was happening was able to get through to Savannah. He provided the understanding, love and safety she needed. Only addiction doesn’t care about that. And sometimes that’s not enough.
Also let me just say, I have never wanted to punch a friend as much as I wanted to punch Jade. Not only for what she encouraged but for how very close she hits to home. In all aspects and characters, I related to this story. It’s frustrating, it makes you feel helpless, and it’s soul crushing.
The ending though? That got me. This story hurts my heart. And now I have to sit here and wait to see what happens.
💊 addiction
💊 parent loss
💊 broken FMC
💊 love triangle
💊 forbidden love interest
💊 heartache
This story sucked me in immediately. Not because I knew the grief of losing a parent, but because of how much I related to Cole. This story frustrated me, made me laugh, and broke my heart.
Throughout the story I wanted to shake and smack Savannah. Screaming at her not to or don’t or get your shit together.
I don’t think I’ve read a book that made me like the boyfriend as much as I liked the new love interest. And poor Ethan. It’s easy as someone who’s never dealt with addiction or loss to wish for things to be the way they once were. But grief and addiction changes a person. As much as he tried he wasn’t enough. Wasn’t what Savannah needed in those moments.
But Cole, having experienced some of what was happening was able to get through to Savannah. He provided the understanding, love and safety she needed. Only addiction doesn’t care about that. And sometimes that’s not enough.
Also let me just say, I have never wanted to punch a friend as much as I wanted to punch Jade. Not only for what she encouraged but for how very close she hits to home. In all aspects and characters, I related to this story. It’s frustrating, it makes you feel helpless, and it’s soul crushing.
The ending though? That got me. This story hurts my heart. And now I have to sit here and wait to see what happens.
💊 addiction
💊 parent loss
💊 broken FMC
💊 love triangle
💊 forbidden love interest
💊 heartache
April 7, 2026
2⭐️ doesn’t feel enough but 3 ⭐️ feels almost too much.
I thought the writing was done well and was easily understood for such difficult topics. Grief and addiction are tough to get right and I feel they were done their justice.
My issues with the book lie solely in like NOTHING felt like it was happening. We went around in circles the whole time, which I get as we really see Savannah battling internal and externally throughout, but I needed more movement of the story line. Half the book was spent on will they/wont they when Cole was the obvious SAINT of a choice. Granted they’re 18 year old kids and what a mess my own brain and choices were at 18 but still I was begging for something to happen while being stuck on a carousel of the same shit.
Cole saves this book for me. What a fckn gem of a human down to his core. My god, his empathy and grace with Savannah. Seeing the good in her. At times an enabler before realizing how bad things were, but I digress.
His mom being so kind to Savannah and including her and her dad into holidays was so refreshing.
Lily is a steadfast friend.
Jade needs HELP. I get she has her own demons that we don’t know about but let’s stop passing out pills like candy and look inwards to our own issues.
We get Cole’s POV in book two let’s GOOO 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
I thought the writing was done well and was easily understood for such difficult topics. Grief and addiction are tough to get right and I feel they were done their justice.
My issues with the book lie solely in like NOTHING felt like it was happening. We went around in circles the whole time, which I get as we really see Savannah battling internal and externally throughout, but I needed more movement of the story line. Half the book was spent on will they/wont they when Cole was the obvious SAINT of a choice. Granted they’re 18 year old kids and what a mess my own brain and choices were at 18 but still I was begging for something to happen while being stuck on a carousel of the same shit.
Cole saves this book for me. What a fckn gem of a human down to his core. My god, his empathy and grace with Savannah. Seeing the good in her. At times an enabler before realizing how bad things were, but I digress.
His mom being so kind to Savannah and including her and her dad into holidays was so refreshing.
Lily is a steadfast friend.
Jade needs HELP. I get she has her own demons that we don’t know about but let’s stop passing out pills like candy and look inwards to our own issues.
We get Cole’s POV in book two let’s GOOO 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
November 4, 2025
Wow, this book was unexpected. It hit deep on a real personal level. I've been where Savannah is. Trying to block out the pain by feeling numb. I've lost parts of myself to trauma that I've yet to understand and overcome. I lost someone close at a young age in a similar fashion to Savannah's loss. I spiraled and rebelled. Took a lot of drugs and even tried to put an end to it all. Life is funny that way. Even when trying to numb the pain and not feel nothing at all, that silence is the loudest thing I've ever experienced in my life. At my darkest times, I thought the only to make it stop was to no longer exist. Grief, trauma, pain, denial, addiction.... They often go hand-in-hand and we are our own worst enemies so we tell ourselves there's no way out. Some say love overcomes everything. I don't know if that's true, but I can say that having at least one person who doesn't judge you, who really sees you and cares... That's all it takes sometimes, to make it out of that dark abyss. What a spectacular book. Thank you, Nikki Jimenez. I feel seen. I feel heard. I feel valued. You should be proud of what you wrote. I know it's going to help a lot of people.
And Cole.....I need him to be real. He was perfect. New book boyfriend!!
And Cole.....I need him to be real. He was perfect. New book boyfriend!!
November 11, 2025
📣 ARC REVIEW 📣
Verdict: 4⭐️ 2🌶
*It’s messy. It’s emotional. It’s honest–and even when I didn’t like what I felt, I couldn’t look away.*
This book hurt–in a raw, heavy, harder than I expected kind of way. It follows Savannah, a girl spiraling after her mother’s suicide, struggling to claw her way out of addiction while being torn between two men–Ethan, who she’s known since childhood, overprotective to the point of control, and Cole, the new guy, the one who should be better for her, but still keeps her too close to the life she’s trying to escape. I found myself angry at both men for different reasons, especially Cole, the “good choice”. He’s supportive and steady emotionally. The closest thing to comfort she’s had since the loss of her mother, but still contributes to her addiction.
This isn’t an easy story to love, but it’s one that stays with you. It’s emotional and frustrating but incredibly human. Jimenez’ writing captures addiction and grief with brutal honesty. The emotional conflict, the morally gray areas, the ache of wanting better for someone who’s still learning how to want better for herself–it’s all there.
Thank you for trusting me to meet Sav, Cole, Ethan, and the rest of the characters before the rest of the world. It has truly been a pleasure. ~ J.L. Danic
Verdict: 4⭐️ 2🌶
*It’s messy. It’s emotional. It’s honest–and even when I didn’t like what I felt, I couldn’t look away.*
This book hurt–in a raw, heavy, harder than I expected kind of way. It follows Savannah, a girl spiraling after her mother’s suicide, struggling to claw her way out of addiction while being torn between two men–Ethan, who she’s known since childhood, overprotective to the point of control, and Cole, the new guy, the one who should be better for her, but still keeps her too close to the life she’s trying to escape. I found myself angry at both men for different reasons, especially Cole, the “good choice”. He’s supportive and steady emotionally. The closest thing to comfort she’s had since the loss of her mother, but still contributes to her addiction.
This isn’t an easy story to love, but it’s one that stays with you. It’s emotional and frustrating but incredibly human. Jimenez’ writing captures addiction and grief with brutal honesty. The emotional conflict, the morally gray areas, the ache of wanting better for someone who’s still learning how to want better for herself–it’s all there.
Thank you for trusting me to meet Sav, Cole, Ethan, and the rest of the characters before the rest of the world. It has truly been a pleasure. ~ J.L. Danic
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