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These Are Not My Final Words
Johnny is fine.
His best friend and writing partner, Jace, is dead.
But Johnny is fine.
It’s really not a problem that the animated TV duck, Dick, that Johnny created with Jace appears at Jace’s funeral and begins speaking to Johnny with Jace’s voice.
Through messy memories, this unreliable narrator must learn to untangle his co-dependency from Jace by facing his unrequited feelings and opening his heart to new possibilities.
Maybe by letting go of the show, Johnny can learn to let go of his own grief and say goodbye to Jace - and Dick - for good.
His best friend and writing partner, Jace, is dead.
But Johnny is fine.
It’s really not a problem that the animated TV duck, Dick, that Johnny created with Jace appears at Jace’s funeral and begins speaking to Johnny with Jace’s voice.
Through messy memories, this unreliable narrator must learn to untangle his co-dependency from Jace by facing his unrequited feelings and opening his heart to new possibilities.
Maybe by letting go of the show, Johnny can learn to let go of his own grief and say goodbye to Jace - and Dick - for good.
- GenresContemporaryLGBTFiction
270 pages, Paperback
Published November 4, 2025
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 32 reviews
March 12, 2026
"When you look back at a life post-mortem and search desperately for clues and suffering, you'll find them."
The book is written from Johnny's perspective, whose best friend commits suicide. He struggles with handling grief as it begins to manifest in surreal ways throughout his daily life.
Overall, this was a compelling read. As someone who has yet to experience serious loss, there is profoundness in finding comfort in the known even if it means forcing one's self to take baby steps to engender a sense of normalcy. I enjoyed that the chapters were split into episodes similar to a television show, which was a nice callout to Johnny's film writing background. The humor, particularly the quips made by Dick, felt juvenile. However, as a juxtaposition, the emotional vulnerability displayed by Johnny and Riley helped set a serious tone that I appreciated given the gravity of the topic.
Thank you to NetGalley and Truborn Press for providing me with an advance review copy.
The book is written from Johnny's perspective, whose best friend commits suicide. He struggles with handling grief as it begins to manifest in surreal ways throughout his daily life.
Overall, this was a compelling read. As someone who has yet to experience serious loss, there is profoundness in finding comfort in the known even if it means forcing one's self to take baby steps to engender a sense of normalcy. I enjoyed that the chapters were split into episodes similar to a television show, which was a nice callout to Johnny's film writing background. The humor, particularly the quips made by Dick, felt juvenile. However, as a juxtaposition, the emotional vulnerability displayed by Johnny and Riley helped set a serious tone that I appreciated given the gravity of the topic.
Thank you to NetGalley and Truborn Press for providing me with an advance review copy.
November 10, 2025
In which our MC Johnny attempts to come to terms with the death by suicide of his best friend Jace, hindered and helped by an imaginary animated talking duck.
A very individual approach to grief processing, for sure, but all the more realistic (or as realistic as hallucinating ducks can get) for that. It's not emotional wallowing or trauma-dumping, the author is simply telling a quirky story about something truly awful. I enjoyed it a lot -- there's a lot of the practical 'one foot in front of the other' life stuff that tends to happen after a death, especially a sudden one and I particularly enjoyed Johnny and Riley (Jace's wife) renegotiating their own complicated relationship.
Recommended if you're looking for something a little offbeat but warm-hearted!
This review is based upon a complimentary advance reading copy provided by the publisher.
A very individual approach to grief processing, for sure, but all the more realistic (or as realistic as hallucinating ducks can get) for that. It's not emotional wallowing or trauma-dumping, the author is simply telling a quirky story about something truly awful. I enjoyed it a lot -- there's a lot of the practical 'one foot in front of the other' life stuff that tends to happen after a death, especially a sudden one and I particularly enjoyed Johnny and Riley (Jace's wife) renegotiating their own complicated relationship.
Recommended if you're looking for something a little offbeat but warm-hearted!
This review is based upon a complimentary advance reading copy provided by the publisher.
September 29, 2025
Samantha Ryan’s THESE ARE NOT MY FINAL WORDS tells the story of Johnny, a thirty-something screenwriter in Hollywood dealing with the suicide of his best friend and writing partner, Jace. He copes with the loss the only way he knows how: through an imaginary cartoon duck that speaks in Jace’s voice. As he learns to navigate life, work, and family without Jace’s larger-than-life presence, Johnny is left to confront his feelings for Jace, his career, and himself alongside his new animated sidekick.
In a surprisingly charming depiction of the absurdity of grief, Ryan balances wit and sincerity, creating a novel that is as endearing as it is poignant.
While the novel is heartfelt and often in on the joke, a few conversations could have been enriched with more physical description, and certain plot turns felt a bit rushed. These are small distractions that ultimately kept this from being a perfect five-star read. (Review based on an ARC)
In a surprisingly charming depiction of the absurdity of grief, Ryan balances wit and sincerity, creating a novel that is as endearing as it is poignant.
While the novel is heartfelt and often in on the joke, a few conversations could have been enriched with more physical description, and certain plot turns felt a bit rushed. These are small distractions that ultimately kept this from being a perfect five-star read. (Review based on an ARC)
November 5, 2025
4.25⭐️
This was a wonderfully funny, heartbreaking look at processing grief.
Johnny is fine? I love an unreliable narrator trying to reconcile his feelings and memories with newly revealed secrets and trying navigate life without his best friend who he had a codependent relationship with.
Aside from the hallucination - the story felt real and grounded. The relationship between Johnny and Riley, Jace’s widow felt true in the ebbs and flows. You felt their friendship and loss of their person who represented different things to both of them.
You also understood why Johnny and Jace were friends and why Johnny was so ride or die. Sometimes in these types of grief books, you’re like why are they friends? Here I got it.
Chapter 13 was gut wrenching.
This was short and sweet. I couldn’t put it down. I actually enjoyed the ending. Even if I could’ve used another 30 pages to flesh out some things.
Thank you to NetGalley for the Advanced Reader Copy.
‘There is no term for when one human is in a present, and one is in the past. There’s no way to express that one can live while the other cannot. No conjunction defined what it meant to survive the death of someone else.’
“Why do you look different? Something’s different.”
He laughed. “I’m drawn at. I’m not used to being presented in three dimensions. I think our brain is filling in some of the gaps maybe.”
“That makes sense.”
He laughed again. “That’s the part that makes sense to you. Jesus Christ.”
‘I didn’t feel like I was having some kind of mental break with reality, but I wasn’t sure what that would feel like. It had never happened before. The brief thought that Jace would find this fucking hilarious crossed my mind.’
‘I was immediately very conscious of the idea that everyone around me, looked like they were about to cry at any minute, but also were waiting for me to cry at any minute, and I wasn’t sure how to handle either of those ideas.’
‘I flipped through the notebook, desperately searching for more sacred text, more clues, or insight into the very real and honest Jason Van Noy. But it was page after page of blank nothingness – empty space of an unfinished life.’
This was a wonderfully funny, heartbreaking look at processing grief.
Johnny is fine? I love an unreliable narrator trying to reconcile his feelings and memories with newly revealed secrets and trying navigate life without his best friend who he had a codependent relationship with.
Aside from the hallucination - the story felt real and grounded. The relationship between Johnny and Riley, Jace’s widow felt true in the ebbs and flows. You felt their friendship and loss of their person who represented different things to both of them.
You also understood why Johnny and Jace were friends and why Johnny was so ride or die. Sometimes in these types of grief books, you’re like why are they friends? Here I got it.
Chapter 13 was gut wrenching.
This was short and sweet. I couldn’t put it down. I actually enjoyed the ending. Even if I could’ve used another 30 pages to flesh out some things.
Thank you to NetGalley for the Advanced Reader Copy.
‘There is no term for when one human is in a present, and one is in the past. There’s no way to express that one can live while the other cannot. No conjunction defined what it meant to survive the death of someone else.’
“Why do you look different? Something’s different.”
He laughed. “I’m drawn at. I’m not used to being presented in three dimensions. I think our brain is filling in some of the gaps maybe.”
“That makes sense.”
He laughed again. “That’s the part that makes sense to you. Jesus Christ.”
‘I didn’t feel like I was having some kind of mental break with reality, but I wasn’t sure what that would feel like. It had never happened before. The brief thought that Jace would find this fucking hilarious crossed my mind.’
‘I was immediately very conscious of the idea that everyone around me, looked like they were about to cry at any minute, but also were waiting for me to cry at any minute, and I wasn’t sure how to handle either of those ideas.’
‘I flipped through the notebook, desperately searching for more sacred text, more clues, or insight into the very real and honest Jason Van Noy. But it was page after page of blank nothingness – empty space of an unfinished life.’
October 30, 2025
Funny, sad, and heartfelt. 'These Are Not My Final Words' is an honest account of grief and how it can affect different people. Every chapter brought something new and unexpected. And while the theme is grief, this novel is so much more: it's a story of love, self-exploration, and acceptance.
These Are Not My Final Words follows Jonathan (Johnny), a screenwriter whose best friend, Jace, passed away suddenly. Johnny finds it incredibly difficult to move on – to accept that, from now on, he has to live his life without Jace in it, because, well, who is Johnny without Jace?
Johnny starts to see the animated Duck they created, Dick, AKA Jace, making him wonder whether he’s having a mental breakdown or if it’s normal to start hallucinating when grieving someone who was so close to you.
Samantha Ryan has written a sad but also funny account of the grieving process. It is messy. It is heartbreaking. But it can also be beautiful. The interactions between Johnny and Dick are hilarious, as Dick is, well, a dick.
In These Are Not My Final Words, the reader has a front-row seat to how grief works: how it can impact someone’s life – their relationships, work, and overall well-being. Samantha Ryan did an amazing job with this novel. While the theme may be considered dark, this novel is very uplifting.
The way Samantha used her quill is magnificent. This novel was easy to read and easy to like, and I recommend it to anyone who enjoys modern literature or has recently suffered a loss and needs a reminder they’re not alone – that ‘it’s okay to not be okay’.
These Are Not My Final Words follows Jonathan (Johnny), a screenwriter whose best friend, Jace, passed away suddenly. Johnny finds it incredibly difficult to move on – to accept that, from now on, he has to live his life without Jace in it, because, well, who is Johnny without Jace?
Johnny starts to see the animated Duck they created, Dick, AKA Jace, making him wonder whether he’s having a mental breakdown or if it’s normal to start hallucinating when grieving someone who was so close to you.
'I opened my eyes wide enough to see what was causing the problem and was staring straight at Dick, settling his feathers into the chair where Blake had been sitting only an hour before.'
Samantha Ryan has written a sad but also funny account of the grieving process. It is messy. It is heartbreaking. But it can also be beautiful. The interactions between Johnny and Dick are hilarious, as Dick is, well, a dick.
In These Are Not My Final Words, the reader has a front-row seat to how grief works: how it can impact someone’s life – their relationships, work, and overall well-being. Samantha Ryan did an amazing job with this novel. While the theme may be considered dark, this novel is very uplifting.
'I turned to her, watching the tears welling up. I didn’t cry when Jace died. I hadn’t cried about any of it. It was too sad to make me cry. Instead, I had been numb, stumbling around, observing it all without participating.'
The way Samantha used her quill is magnificent. This novel was easy to read and easy to like, and I recommend it to anyone who enjoys modern literature or has recently suffered a loss and needs a reminder they’re not alone – that ‘it’s okay to not be okay’.
October 22, 2025
These Are Not My Final Words had me laughing, crying, and laughing so hard I cried. I could not put this book down.
Johnny is getting ready to leave the funeral of his best friend and writing partner, Jace, when he finds an odd sight in the church. Dick the duck, the popular cartoon character created by Jace and Johnny is sitting there in a pew, holding Johnny's glasses. Thus starts this quirky yet heartrending story of grief and healing.
Ryan's writing pulled me in from the very first paragraph. I also deal with dark and hard life situations with humor so I was right there with Johnny through his grief. I absolutely loved Johnny and Dick. I know they are the same person but the way they played off each other to lighten the very heavy load of the story was perfection.
The only thing holding this story back for me was that the last third of the book felt a little rushed. Some plot points could have used a little more time to really hit home.
I am so glad I stumbled upon this ARC (thank you Netgalley and Samantha Ryan) and I will be singing it's praises for a long, long time.
Johnny is getting ready to leave the funeral of his best friend and writing partner, Jace, when he finds an odd sight in the church. Dick the duck, the popular cartoon character created by Jace and Johnny is sitting there in a pew, holding Johnny's glasses. Thus starts this quirky yet heartrending story of grief and healing.
Ryan's writing pulled me in from the very first paragraph. I also deal with dark and hard life situations with humor so I was right there with Johnny through his grief. I absolutely loved Johnny and Dick. I know they are the same person but the way they played off each other to lighten the very heavy load of the story was perfection.
The only thing holding this story back for me was that the last third of the book felt a little rushed. Some plot points could have used a little more time to really hit home.
I am so glad I stumbled upon this ARC (thank you Netgalley and Samantha Ryan) and I will be singing it's praises for a long, long time.
February 9, 2026
I got this book from netgalley, not realizing it had already been published. Highly recommend, unless discussion of suicide is a trigger for you. A man loses his best friend and business partner to suicide and is trying to deal with his numbness and life after. They created a show together called Dick, who is a detective and a duck. Dick starts following him around. So it starts as a slightly amusing take but gets more serious as it goes. Really tough topic done really well.
March 15, 2026
This is a wonderful exploration of grief, the challenges of supporting someone with mental illness, and learning to forgive yourself. While I found it more tragi- than comic, the premise of the imaginary duck did provide a humorous element that stopped this from feeling heavy. I think the themes are universal, and the well-drawn characters and innovative plot structure make them relatable and poignant.
May 14, 2026
Thank you to Samantha Ryan and NetGalley for the opportunity to read this book.
*These Are Not My Final Words* by Samantha Ryan is a strange, heartfelt, and emotionally messy exploration of grief, co-dependency, and unresolved love. Blending surreal elements with deeply human emotions, the novel manages to be funny, uncomfortable, and quietly devastating all at once.
The story follows Johnny, who insists repeatedly that he is “fine” after the death of his best friend and creative partner, Jace. Of course, it becomes immediately obvious that he is anything but. Things spiral further when the animated TV duck Johnny and Jace created together suddenly appears at the funeral speaking in Jace’s voice. From there, the novel leans fully into its surreal premise, using the bizarre appearance of this cartoon duck as both comic relief and an emotional manifestation of Johnny’s inability to let go.
What works especially well is Johnny’s narration. He is deeply unreliable, emotionally avoidant, and often frustrating, but that is exactly what makes him feel authentic. Ryan captures the strange denial that can come with grief so well, particularly when it is tangled up with unresolved feelings and emotional dependence. Johnny’s relationship with Jace is messy and complicated in a way that feels painfully believable. The novel explores not only the loss of a friend, but also the loss of a future Johnny never admitted he wanted.
The humour throughout the book is another standout. The absurdity of a foul-mouthed animated duck showing up during moments of emotional collapse should not work nearly as well as it does, but Ryan balances the comedy and heartbreak carefully. The surreal elements never completely overshadow the emotional core of the story, instead reinforcing Johnny’s fractured mental state and inability to separate memory from reality.
The writing itself has a raw, conversational quality that suits the narrative perfectly. The fragmented memories and emotional spirals mirror Johnny’s grief, creating a story that feels chaotic in an intentional way. At times, the book feels almost like watching someone slowly unravel while trying desperately to convince everyone, including themselves, that they are okay.
That said, the novel’s emotional messiness can occasionally work against it. Some sections feel repetitive, particularly in Johnny’s internal monologue, and there are moments where the pacing drifts slightly as the story circles the same emotional beats. While the surreal tone is compelling, it can also create a little emotional distance in places, making some scenes feel more abstract than impactful.
Still, when the book lands emotionally, it lands hard. Beneath the humour and weirdness is a genuinely moving story about learning to separate love from dependence and understanding that grief is not something you “fix” by refusing to face it. The ending, in particular, feels earned and emotionally satisfying without becoming overly neat or sentimental.
Overall, *These Are Not My Final Words* is an inventive and emotionally honest novel that uses surrealism to explore very real pain. It is funny, awkward, heartfelt, and occasionally heartbreaking, with a protagonist who feels frustratingly human in all the best ways.
A strong 3.75-star read for anyone who enjoys emotionally messy characters, unconventional grief stories, and novels that balance absurd humour with genuine emotional depth.
*These Are Not My Final Words* by Samantha Ryan is a strange, heartfelt, and emotionally messy exploration of grief, co-dependency, and unresolved love. Blending surreal elements with deeply human emotions, the novel manages to be funny, uncomfortable, and quietly devastating all at once.
The story follows Johnny, who insists repeatedly that he is “fine” after the death of his best friend and creative partner, Jace. Of course, it becomes immediately obvious that he is anything but. Things spiral further when the animated TV duck Johnny and Jace created together suddenly appears at the funeral speaking in Jace’s voice. From there, the novel leans fully into its surreal premise, using the bizarre appearance of this cartoon duck as both comic relief and an emotional manifestation of Johnny’s inability to let go.
What works especially well is Johnny’s narration. He is deeply unreliable, emotionally avoidant, and often frustrating, but that is exactly what makes him feel authentic. Ryan captures the strange denial that can come with grief so well, particularly when it is tangled up with unresolved feelings and emotional dependence. Johnny’s relationship with Jace is messy and complicated in a way that feels painfully believable. The novel explores not only the loss of a friend, but also the loss of a future Johnny never admitted he wanted.
The humour throughout the book is another standout. The absurdity of a foul-mouthed animated duck showing up during moments of emotional collapse should not work nearly as well as it does, but Ryan balances the comedy and heartbreak carefully. The surreal elements never completely overshadow the emotional core of the story, instead reinforcing Johnny’s fractured mental state and inability to separate memory from reality.
The writing itself has a raw, conversational quality that suits the narrative perfectly. The fragmented memories and emotional spirals mirror Johnny’s grief, creating a story that feels chaotic in an intentional way. At times, the book feels almost like watching someone slowly unravel while trying desperately to convince everyone, including themselves, that they are okay.
That said, the novel’s emotional messiness can occasionally work against it. Some sections feel repetitive, particularly in Johnny’s internal monologue, and there are moments where the pacing drifts slightly as the story circles the same emotional beats. While the surreal tone is compelling, it can also create a little emotional distance in places, making some scenes feel more abstract than impactful.
Still, when the book lands emotionally, it lands hard. Beneath the humour and weirdness is a genuinely moving story about learning to separate love from dependence and understanding that grief is not something you “fix” by refusing to face it. The ending, in particular, feels earned and emotionally satisfying without becoming overly neat or sentimental.
Overall, *These Are Not My Final Words* is an inventive and emotionally honest novel that uses surrealism to explore very real pain. It is funny, awkward, heartfelt, and occasionally heartbreaking, with a protagonist who feels frustratingly human in all the best ways.
A strong 3.75-star read for anyone who enjoys emotionally messy characters, unconventional grief stories, and novels that balance absurd humour with genuine emotional depth.
April 2, 2026
ARC review
Johnny and Jace have been best friends and writing partners since college, which birthed the creation of their now-hit comedy tv show “Dick”. Now, Jace has taken his own life and Johnny is joined at his funeral by their character Dick - an animated Duck that speaks with Jace’s voice. Of course no one else can see or hear Dick, but his likeness to his dead friend and unwillingness to leave him alone unsettles Johnny through his journey of grief in the months following Jace’s death.
As far as grief goes, I think Samantha Ryan has created a fantastic portrayal. There is an added layer of guilt and shame Johnny feels due to how Jace died and this manifests in his delusions of Dick, who kinda represents Jace but also represents them as a partnership. Johnny is gay and Jace was not, and Johnny has always been in love with Jace throughout his own relationships and Jace’s marriage, so he feels the loss greater than anyone else potentially. He floats between the present and the past as he remembers and mourns the person who had the most impact on his life, often wearing rose-coloured glasses, and I really empathised with him.
After the initial disbelief over the appearance of a cartoon, Johnny accepts Dick’s presence, and he becomes an unreliable narrator at times and exhibits out-of-the-norm behaviour. His journey and feeling of hopelessness looks a lot like my experience with grief so the whole experience was a little cathartic - couple tears were shed! Both men are flawed and messy, even from Johnny’s own perspective, and I wouldn’t change anything about them.
Overall, These Are Not My Final Words is a moving portrait of a friendship that burrows so deep into you that it feels like a limb, and what happens when that limb gets ripped off.
Mental health and su*c*de is a prominent theme throughout, look after yourself before/while/after reading if you want to take my rec! 🫶
Johnny and Jace have been best friends and writing partners since college, which birthed the creation of their now-hit comedy tv show “Dick”. Now, Jace has taken his own life and Johnny is joined at his funeral by their character Dick - an animated Duck that speaks with Jace’s voice. Of course no one else can see or hear Dick, but his likeness to his dead friend and unwillingness to leave him alone unsettles Johnny through his journey of grief in the months following Jace’s death.
As far as grief goes, I think Samantha Ryan has created a fantastic portrayal. There is an added layer of guilt and shame Johnny feels due to how Jace died and this manifests in his delusions of Dick, who kinda represents Jace but also represents them as a partnership. Johnny is gay and Jace was not, and Johnny has always been in love with Jace throughout his own relationships and Jace’s marriage, so he feels the loss greater than anyone else potentially. He floats between the present and the past as he remembers and mourns the person who had the most impact on his life, often wearing rose-coloured glasses, and I really empathised with him.
After the initial disbelief over the appearance of a cartoon, Johnny accepts Dick’s presence, and he becomes an unreliable narrator at times and exhibits out-of-the-norm behaviour. His journey and feeling of hopelessness looks a lot like my experience with grief so the whole experience was a little cathartic - couple tears were shed! Both men are flawed and messy, even from Johnny’s own perspective, and I wouldn’t change anything about them.
Overall, These Are Not My Final Words is a moving portrait of a friendship that burrows so deep into you that it feels like a limb, and what happens when that limb gets ripped off.
Mental health and su*c*de is a prominent theme throughout, look after yourself before/while/after reading if you want to take my rec! 🫶
January 19, 2026
I liked the tv writing conventions/tv tropes that are sprinkled throughout - especially how the chapters are set up like known types of tv episodes (bottle episode, finale, etc). The writing surrounding grief and how complex it is, how everyone handles it differently, was excellent and somehow felt like it mirrored how disorienting deep grief can be.
The author really does a fantastic job of making all these characters deeply unlikeable people, but then making you pause and wonder if that’s just what grief is doing to them. Riley felt so inconsistent in how she views Johnny and even how she treats Johnny: this is could be a mirror of the extremely inconsistent way Jace treated him as well. But then we have small glances at things like a photo of the three of them on vacation, a taste of the fact that there was a warm multi-year relationship there that we haven’t seen at all.
In the same way, it’s so difficult to feel Johnny’s supposed love for Jace as well. Every snapshot of their relationship felt codependent and toxic. Every memory that crops up for Johnny is a fight or just a snippet of Jace being absolutely awful. Every memory of them together had me wanting to tell Johnny to get up and stop letting Jace treat him this way. And while Johnny does come around to seeing how unhealthy their connection was - is it also coloured by the grief and anger over losing his closest friend?
In short, this book is itself a reflection of how confusing and unique grief really is.
Thank you to Truborn Press and NetGalley for this eARC!
The author really does a fantastic job of making all these characters deeply unlikeable people, but then making you pause and wonder if that’s just what grief is doing to them. Riley felt so inconsistent in how she views Johnny and even how she treats Johnny: this is could be a mirror of the extremely inconsistent way Jace treated him as well. But then we have small glances at things like a photo of the three of them on vacation, a taste of the fact that there was a warm multi-year relationship there that we haven’t seen at all.
In the same way, it’s so difficult to feel Johnny’s supposed love for Jace as well. Every snapshot of their relationship felt codependent and toxic. Every memory that crops up for Johnny is a fight or just a snippet of Jace being absolutely awful. Every memory of them together had me wanting to tell Johnny to get up and stop letting Jace treat him this way. And while Johnny does come around to seeing how unhealthy their connection was - is it also coloured by the grief and anger over losing his closest friend?
In short, this book is itself a reflection of how confusing and unique grief really is.
Thank you to Truborn Press and NetGalley for this eARC!
February 4, 2026
I was immediately drawn to the title of this book, and after reading the plot summary, I had high expectations because it seemed right up my alley. I’m happy to say that I was not disappointed. The author tackles grief with humor and creates a deeply relatable protagonist, one you can’t help but feel for.
The chapters are structured like episodes of a TV show, and given the protagonist’s job as a showrunner and screenwriter, the novel is filled with clever references to plot devices, tropes, and narrative techniques. This format works particularly well and adds another layer of charm to the story.
I also really enjoyed the flashbacks, in which the protagonist recalls the early days of starting the company and the steps that ultimately led to its success. If you enjoyed Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow for its exploration of friendship, the development of a creative project, and grief, you will most likely enjoy this book as well.
The chapters are structured like episodes of a TV show, and given the protagonist’s job as a showrunner and screenwriter, the novel is filled with clever references to plot devices, tropes, and narrative techniques. This format works particularly well and adds another layer of charm to the story.
I also really enjoyed the flashbacks, in which the protagonist recalls the early days of starting the company and the steps that ultimately led to its success. If you enjoyed Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow for its exploration of friendship, the development of a creative project, and grief, you will most likely enjoy this book as well.
March 12, 2026
3.5 rounded up
Thank you to the author for sending me a copy for review (sorry it took me forever to get to it)!
These Are Not My Final Words is a lovely, quiet, deeply emotional novel that I really enjoyed reading. It left me feeling sad, but not in a devastated way- it leaves you with hope that our main character will find a way forward, without sacrificing the deeply depressing nature of the novel.
The novel touches on important themes like suicide, depression, and grief in a way that's engaging, honest, and incredibly approachable. I think this book will touch people; I know it touched me.
If you enjoy queer stories & honest approaches to the sadder parts of life- this one's for you.
Thank you to the author for sending me a copy for review (sorry it took me forever to get to it)!
These Are Not My Final Words is a lovely, quiet, deeply emotional novel that I really enjoyed reading. It left me feeling sad, but not in a devastated way- it leaves you with hope that our main character will find a way forward, without sacrificing the deeply depressing nature of the novel.
The novel touches on important themes like suicide, depression, and grief in a way that's engaging, honest, and incredibly approachable. I think this book will touch people; I know it touched me.
If you enjoy queer stories & honest approaches to the sadder parts of life- this one's for you.
March 6, 2026
Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC, in exchange for an unbiased review.
I was drawn to this book because of its crazy plot description: During the funeral for cartoonist Jase, his creative partner Johnny sees their famous animated duck character in the congregation. The duck follows Johnny around as he tries to process his partner's suicide.
It's a comic novel and a meditation on grief and unrequited love. Each chapter is named for a TV show writing gimmick (like a McGuffin, or Clip Show). While I thought the ending was a bit abrupt, I really enjoyed the author's creativity and humor about an otherwise dark subject.
I was drawn to this book because of its crazy plot description: During the funeral for cartoonist Jase, his creative partner Johnny sees their famous animated duck character in the congregation. The duck follows Johnny around as he tries to process his partner's suicide.
It's a comic novel and a meditation on grief and unrequited love. Each chapter is named for a TV show writing gimmick (like a McGuffin, or Clip Show). While I thought the ending was a bit abrupt, I really enjoyed the author's creativity and humor about an otherwise dark subject.
October 25, 2025
Samantha Ryan is "4 and 0" with her latest published book. She switches genres with ease, while keeping her trademark warmth and in-depth character studies.
I found the first quarter a little unmoored, not having her usual specificity of place, but as the book continued, I realized it was intentional. The end had me tearing up multiple times with the hard-won honesty.
I would highly recommend it for those who love the first season of Kevin Can F Himself, as it has
a similar sense of humor, or for those who enjoy the domestic stories of Liane Moriarty.
I found the first quarter a little unmoored, not having her usual specificity of place, but as the book continued, I realized it was intentional. The end had me tearing up multiple times with the hard-won honesty.
I would highly recommend it for those who love the first season of Kevin Can F Himself, as it has
a similar sense of humor, or for those who enjoy the domestic stories of Liane Moriarty.
February 27, 2026
4.5 stars rounded up!
I absolutely loved this! The premise was super interesting and Ryan's writing is so engaging, I just couldn't put this down. The characters were complex and I loved how Ryan explored grief and how we process it, learning to find the balance between being heartbroken at losing someone so close to you and finding joy in the time you did have together.
I loved the way the chapters were presented like episodes in a TV series and each fit a different episode trope.
Thanks to NetGalley for this arc
I absolutely loved this! The premise was super interesting and Ryan's writing is so engaging, I just couldn't put this down. The characters were complex and I loved how Ryan explored grief and how we process it, learning to find the balance between being heartbroken at losing someone so close to you and finding joy in the time you did have together.
I loved the way the chapters were presented like episodes in a TV series and each fit a different episode trope.
Thanks to NetGalley for this arc
October 12, 2025
Once I started the book I found that I didn’t want to put it down, I immediately fell into the story and it was like I was right there alongside Johnny. The way the story is told made the emotions that much deeper and the personal connections stronger. Grief and loss are tricky things to address, and this book takes a very raw and real look at those emotions, no matter how hard it may be to face them. The raw honesty around dealing with those emotions made the story relatable and had me crying by the end, and wanting more. It is a read that will leave you thinking about it once you close it. I only wish I could read it again, for the first time.
December 7, 2025
Johnny is fine. Johnny goes through the motions. Johnny doesn’t really decide anything for himself.
Reading this one was an enjoyable experience, if not a memorable one. Johnny’s emotional journey is well explored, his grief process complete. Although i can see it was not the point, I do wish some of Jace’s relationships with other people had been fleshed out a little.
Johnny is endearing, but his appeal hinges on pity and a few humorous moments.
This was a Netgalley copy - a few typos and errors remain, but i’ll assume those were edited out before publishing.
Reading this one was an enjoyable experience, if not a memorable one. Johnny’s emotional journey is well explored, his grief process complete. Although i can see it was not the point, I do wish some of Jace’s relationships with other people had been fleshed out a little.
Johnny is endearing, but his appeal hinges on pity and a few humorous moments.
This was a Netgalley copy - a few typos and errors remain, but i’ll assume those were edited out before publishing.
January 16, 2026
4.5⭐️
What a quirky, chaotic (in the BEST way), heart wrenching, lovely book this is!
Everyone processes grief differently and Johnny is processing through an imaginary duck. It's not wrong. It's a look through the eyes of the ones left behind after they've lost someone to suicide. It's a look into how easy it is to miss the signs. A narrative on humanity and grief. It's is not trauma-dumping, it's real.
I laughed and I cried and I FELT things.
What a quirky, chaotic (in the BEST way), heart wrenching, lovely book this is!
Everyone processes grief differently and Johnny is processing through an imaginary duck. It's not wrong. It's a look through the eyes of the ones left behind after they've lost someone to suicide. It's a look into how easy it is to miss the signs. A narrative on humanity and grief. It's is not trauma-dumping, it's real.
I laughed and I cried and I FELT things.
February 22, 2026
Please read the triggered warnings on this book!
-suicide
This novel, goes through grief with a humorous side to it. And for it to have such a heavy topic, I devour in three days. Johnny has my heart. We followed him through the death of his best friend and co-workers. And how he dealt to let him go. How he tries to move with his life, trying to love again. It's funny, emotional, romantic and heartwarming. I can fully see it as a movie!
-suicide
This novel, goes through grief with a humorous side to it. And for it to have such a heavy topic, I devour in three days. Johnny has my heart. We followed him through the death of his best friend and co-workers. And how he dealt to let him go. How he tries to move with his life, trying to love again. It's funny, emotional, romantic and heartwarming. I can fully see it as a movie!
May 5, 2026
4.5 Stars Rounded up to 5
This is one of those books you want to throw across the room when you finish, but you would still read it all over again given a different choice. A genuine and beautiful character study mixing grief and humor. A little repetitive at a few points, but otherwise a poignant look at those left behind after someone's choice to suddenly separate themselves from their own life.
This is one of those books you want to throw across the room when you finish, but you would still read it all over again given a different choice. A genuine and beautiful character study mixing grief and humor. A little repetitive at a few points, but otherwise a poignant look at those left behind after someone's choice to suddenly separate themselves from their own life.
January 6, 2026
ARC Review
I was so intrigued by this book, but it fell so short of my expectations. I love characters constantly tinged with self-loathing but this didn’t work. The voice wasn’t for me.
Thank you to Truborn Press and Netgalley for the ARC.
I was so intrigued by this book, but it fell so short of my expectations. I love characters constantly tinged with self-loathing but this didn’t work. The voice wasn’t for me.
Thank you to Truborn Press and Netgalley for the ARC.
September 29, 2025
This book will make you laugh and cry.
September 22, 2025
If Wilfred and Looking for Alaska had a baby, this would be it.
In 2013, I reread LFA. I was 20, still trying to make sense of the sudden and terrible death of a close friend when we had just graduated high school. John Green's young people searching for sense in a senseless tragedy spoke to my young, grieving heart.
It's 2025, and I've been fortunate to have loved and had the misfortune of trying to make sense of more senseless tragedy..including the kinds in These are Not My Final Words. like Green, Samantha Ryan wrote grief as if my broken heart bled into her pages.
This book is everything I love about her writing. raw, honest, funny, devastating. I cried as much as I laughed and sighed.
I had the pleasure of an advance copy in exchange for my honest review.
In 2013, I reread LFA. I was 20, still trying to make sense of the sudden and terrible death of a close friend when we had just graduated high school. John Green's young people searching for sense in a senseless tragedy spoke to my young, grieving heart.
It's 2025, and I've been fortunate to have loved and had the misfortune of trying to make sense of more senseless tragedy..including the kinds in These are Not My Final Words. like Green, Samantha Ryan wrote grief as if my broken heart bled into her pages.
This book is everything I love about her writing. raw, honest, funny, devastating. I cried as much as I laughed and sighed.
I had the pleasure of an advance copy in exchange for my honest review.
February 23, 2026
This is a hard one to rate. I'm not going to say this was a BAD book, because it definitely wasn't. It has a really interesting premise and beautiful cover that caught my attention immediately. I love stories that explore grief and mental illness, and this book had that, along with an extra dose of codependency.
The things I liked:
- I enjoyed the non-linear approach. I liked how the main character dips in and out of time, before and after Jace. It can be a little confusing to follow at times, but I liked it!
- I liked the portrayal of Jace and the reality of his codependence with Johnny. The author does a great job at lacing together both really good aspects of Jace and really toxic aspects. It's so easy to make someone seem better than they were after they've died, and the author doesn't shy away from writing about Jace in the totality of who he was.
- In continuation of that, i really came to care about Jace and Johnny's bond.
- The portrayal of grief in general was really well done and empathetic.
The things I didn't like:
- I feel like there were subplots that were toyed with and dropped, or just not developed at all. I liked Yuto when he was introduced - I was excited about Yuto. But he doesn't really end up... Going anywhere and his relationship with Johnny doesn't feel like it matters. The plagiarism plotline doesn't go anywhere either, and it's even brought up by Dick how it's anticlimactic. Just because you point it out yourself doesn't make it good writing - it just feels lazy and a waste of page space.
- The characters in general were really flat and hard to distinguish from each other. There are SO many names introduced throughout the story and only like a quarter of them matter. Often a character would appear on a page and I'd be like 'shit - am I supposed to know who this is?' This isn't helped by the fact that there's little to NO character descriptions apart from MAYBE Riley, who we know is black.
- the ending was........ Unsatisfying.
I liked the general shape of the story and it's characters and it has a lot of potential, but unfortunately it just ended up falling really flat to me.
UPDATE: While my problems with the book remain the same, I've decided to update my review to a 3.5 instead of a 2.5. I've ruminated on it more and found the good aspects compelling. It's definitely a story I've come back to and thought about and would definitely re-read if it were made into an audiobook.
This was an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
The things I liked:
- I enjoyed the non-linear approach. I liked how the main character dips in and out of time, before and after Jace. It can be a little confusing to follow at times, but I liked it!
- I liked the portrayal of Jace and the reality of his codependence with Johnny. The author does a great job at lacing together both really good aspects of Jace and really toxic aspects. It's so easy to make someone seem better than they were after they've died, and the author doesn't shy away from writing about Jace in the totality of who he was.
- In continuation of that, i really came to care about Jace and Johnny's bond.
- The portrayal of grief in general was really well done and empathetic.
The things I didn't like:
- I feel like there were subplots that were toyed with and dropped, or just not developed at all. I liked Yuto when he was introduced - I was excited about Yuto. But he doesn't really end up... Going anywhere and his relationship with Johnny doesn't feel like it matters. The plagiarism plotline doesn't go anywhere either, and it's even brought up by Dick how it's anticlimactic. Just because you point it out yourself doesn't make it good writing - it just feels lazy and a waste of page space.
- The characters in general were really flat and hard to distinguish from each other. There are SO many names introduced throughout the story and only like a quarter of them matter. Often a character would appear on a page and I'd be like 'shit - am I supposed to know who this is?' This isn't helped by the fact that there's little to NO character descriptions apart from MAYBE Riley, who we know is black.
- the ending was........ Unsatisfying.
I liked the general shape of the story and it's characters and it has a lot of potential, but unfortunately it just ended up falling really flat to me.
UPDATE: While my problems with the book remain the same, I've decided to update my review to a 3.5 instead of a 2.5. I've ruminated on it more and found the good aspects compelling. It's definitely a story I've come back to and thought about and would definitely re-read if it were made into an audiobook.
This was an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
October 3, 2025
Where to begin with this book?
Ryan has somehow taken very dark, traumatic subject matter and turned it into a masterpiece of a novel that will make you cry one minute and laugh the next. John is a screen writer, and each chapter of this book is written as if it is an episode of a sitcom. I truly felt like I was watching a tv show while reading this and felt that it was such a unique aspect that made this book so much more than just a sad novel about losing someone you love.
The grief of losing his best friend to suicide has consumed John’s life to the point that he is having flashbacks to times spent with Jace, and has manifested his best friend into their joint creation “Dick” and animated duck. As he navigates the loss of his friend and closest coworker, John is also learning that it is okay to not be okay, and that he is deserving of more than he thought.
The way that Ryan has handled the hard topics in this book is incredibly beautiful. She presents a main character that is in some ways struggling to find the new him, but is also open to talking about his grief and doing whatever he can to help himself mentally. The grief in this book is depicted so respectfully and feels so relatable to others who are experiencing grief.
This novel does cover some very heavy topics but it was done so wonderfully that I could not put it down.
Ryan has somehow taken very dark, traumatic subject matter and turned it into a masterpiece of a novel that will make you cry one minute and laugh the next. John is a screen writer, and each chapter of this book is written as if it is an episode of a sitcom. I truly felt like I was watching a tv show while reading this and felt that it was such a unique aspect that made this book so much more than just a sad novel about losing someone you love.
The grief of losing his best friend to suicide has consumed John’s life to the point that he is having flashbacks to times spent with Jace, and has manifested his best friend into their joint creation “Dick” and animated duck. As he navigates the loss of his friend and closest coworker, John is also learning that it is okay to not be okay, and that he is deserving of more than he thought.
The way that Ryan has handled the hard topics in this book is incredibly beautiful. She presents a main character that is in some ways struggling to find the new him, but is also open to talking about his grief and doing whatever he can to help himself mentally. The grief in this book is depicted so respectfully and feels so relatable to others who are experiencing grief.
This novel does cover some very heavy topics but it was done so wonderfully that I could not put it down.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
October 25, 2025
Sensitive, yet irreverent, These Are Not My Final Words is a study in contrasts. Most notably, it shows laughter and tears as two sides of the same coin, with the help of an obnoxious, quacking animation that is part intrusive thought and part indispensable companion. It mingles the absurd and profound, the fantastical and the mundane in a manner reminiscent of master storyteller Ray Bradbury, while delivering contemporary freshness and authenticity via its main character. Through his journey of confronting loss, Johnny convincingly embodies the anxieties and beauties of the human condition (along with the quirks of the creative mind) and lends pathos to a relationship that walks a wobbly tightrope between soulmate-level devotion and toxic codependence.
In short, These Are Not My Final Words is a funny and poignant portrait of grief, love in many facets, and self-discovery.
Thank you to the author and NetGalley for the advanced review copy.
In short, These Are Not My Final Words is a funny and poignant portrait of grief, love in many facets, and self-discovery.
Thank you to the author and NetGalley for the advanced review copy.
March 26, 2026
These Are Not My Final Words by Samantha Ryan is a unique and touching story about grief, friendship, and learning to move forward. The novel follows Johnny, a Hollywood screenwriter trying to cope with the loss of his best friend and writing partner, Jace. What makes the story stand out is the strange but meaningful way Johnny deals with his grief.
The mix of sadness and humour works surprisingly well, making the story feel both heartfelt and a little quirky. Some moments felt slightly rushed, but overall it offers a warm and thoughtful look at how people process loss. Just note that it includes discussion of suicide, which may be difficult for some readers.
The mix of sadness and humour works surprisingly well, making the story feel both heartfelt and a little quirky. Some moments felt slightly rushed, but overall it offers a warm and thoughtful look at how people process loss. Just note that it includes discussion of suicide, which may be difficult for some readers.
October 25, 2025
This was far more of a tragic story than a comedic one, but Dick the duck did provide some much appreciated comedic relief.
It’s a fantastic exploration of grief, of learning to forgive yourself, of the challenges that come with caring for someone with a mental illness.
Thank you Net Galley for the eARC.
It’s a fantastic exploration of grief, of learning to forgive yourself, of the challenges that come with caring for someone with a mental illness.
Thank you Net Galley for the eARC.
October 24, 2025
mostly a tragic story, but nothing with a giant, sarcastic, animated duck as a main character can fully be a tragedy, and the funny aspects really enliven this one. 5 stars. tysm for the arc.
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