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These Are Not My Final Words
Johnny is fine.
His best friend and writing partner, Jace, is dead.
But Johnny is fine.
It’s really not a problem that the animated TV duck, Dick, that Johnny created with Jace appears at Jace’s funeral and begins speaking to Johnny with Jace’s voice.
Through messy memories, this unreliable narrator must learn to untangle his co-dependency from Jace by facing his unrequited feelings and opening his heart to new possibilities.
Maybe by letting go of the show, Johnny can learn to let go of his own grief and say goodbye to Jace - and Dick - for good.
His best friend and writing partner, Jace, is dead.
But Johnny is fine.
It’s really not a problem that the animated TV duck, Dick, that Johnny created with Jace appears at Jace’s funeral and begins speaking to Johnny with Jace’s voice.
Through messy memories, this unreliable narrator must learn to untangle his co-dependency from Jace by facing his unrequited feelings and opening his heart to new possibilities.
Maybe by letting go of the show, Johnny can learn to let go of his own grief and say goodbye to Jace - and Dick - for good.
270 pages, Paperback
Published November 4, 2025
29 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 15 of 15 reviews
November 10, 2025
In which our MC Johnny attempts to come to terms with the death by suicide of his best friend Jace, hindered and helped by an imaginary animated talking duck.
A very individual approach to grief processing, for sure, but all the more realistic (or as realistic as hallucinating ducks can get) for that. It's not emotional wallowing or trauma-dumping, the author is simply telling a quirky story about something truly awful. I enjoyed it a lot -- there's a lot of the practical 'one foot in front of the other' life stuff that tends to happen after a death, especially a sudden one and I particularly enjoyed Johnny and Riley (Jace's wife) renegotiating their own complicated relationship.
Recommended if you're looking for something a little offbeat but warm-hearted!
This review is based upon a complimentary advance reading copy provided by the publisher.
A very individual approach to grief processing, for sure, but all the more realistic (or as realistic as hallucinating ducks can get) for that. It's not emotional wallowing or trauma-dumping, the author is simply telling a quirky story about something truly awful. I enjoyed it a lot -- there's a lot of the practical 'one foot in front of the other' life stuff that tends to happen after a death, especially a sudden one and I particularly enjoyed Johnny and Riley (Jace's wife) renegotiating their own complicated relationship.
Recommended if you're looking for something a little offbeat but warm-hearted!
This review is based upon a complimentary advance reading copy provided by the publisher.
September 29, 2025
Samantha Ryan’s THESE ARE NOT MY FINAL WORDS tells the story of Johnny, a thirty-something screenwriter in Hollywood dealing with the suicide of his best friend and writing partner, Jace. He copes with the loss the only way he knows how: through an imaginary cartoon duck that speaks in Jace’s voice. As he learns to navigate life, work, and family without Jace’s larger-than-life presence, Johnny is left to confront his feelings for Jace, his career, and himself alongside his new animated sidekick.
In a surprisingly charming depiction of the absurdity of grief, Ryan balances wit and sincerity, creating a novel that is as endearing as it is poignant.
While the novel is heartfelt and often in on the joke, a few conversations could have been enriched with more physical description, and certain plot turns felt a bit rushed. These are small distractions that ultimately kept this from being a perfect five-star read. (Review based on an ARC)
In a surprisingly charming depiction of the absurdity of grief, Ryan balances wit and sincerity, creating a novel that is as endearing as it is poignant.
While the novel is heartfelt and often in on the joke, a few conversations could have been enriched with more physical description, and certain plot turns felt a bit rushed. These are small distractions that ultimately kept this from being a perfect five-star read. (Review based on an ARC)
November 5, 2025
4.25⭐️
This was a wonderfully funny, heartbreaking look at processing grief.
Johnny is fine? I love an unreliable narrator trying to reconcile his feelings and memories with newly revealed secrets and trying navigate life without his best friend who he had a codependent relationship with.
Aside from the hallucination - the story felt real and grounded. The relationship between Johnny and Riley, Jace’s widow felt true in the ebbs and flows. You felt their friendship and loss of their person who represented different things to both of them.
You also understood why Johnny and Jace were friends and why Johnny was so ride or die. Sometimes in these types of grief books, you’re like why are they friends? Here I got it.
Chapter 13 was gut wrenching.
This was short and sweet. I couldn’t put it down. I actually enjoyed the ending. Even if I could’ve used another 30 pages to flesh out some things.
Thank you to NetGalley for the Advanced Reader Copy.
‘There is no term for when one human is in a present, and one is in the past. There’s no way to express that one can live while the other cannot. No conjunction defined what it meant to survive the death of someone else.’
“Why do you look different? Something’s different.”
He laughed. “I’m drawn at. I’m not used to being presented in three dimensions. I think our brain is filling in some of the gaps maybe.”
“That makes sense.”
He laughed again. “That’s the part that makes sense to you. Jesus Christ.”
‘I didn’t feel like I was having some kind of mental break with reality, but I wasn’t sure what that would feel like. It had never happened before. The brief thought that Jace would find this fucking hilarious crossed my mind.’
‘I was immediately very conscious of the idea that everyone around me, looked like they were about to cry at any minute, but also were waiting for me to cry at any minute, and I wasn’t sure how to handle either of those ideas.’
‘I flipped through the notebook, desperately searching for more sacred text, more clues, or insight into the very real and honest Jason Van Noy. But it was page after page of blank nothingness – empty space of an unfinished life.’
This was a wonderfully funny, heartbreaking look at processing grief.
Johnny is fine? I love an unreliable narrator trying to reconcile his feelings and memories with newly revealed secrets and trying navigate life without his best friend who he had a codependent relationship with.
Aside from the hallucination - the story felt real and grounded. The relationship between Johnny and Riley, Jace’s widow felt true in the ebbs and flows. You felt their friendship and loss of their person who represented different things to both of them.
You also understood why Johnny and Jace were friends and why Johnny was so ride or die. Sometimes in these types of grief books, you’re like why are they friends? Here I got it.
Chapter 13 was gut wrenching.
This was short and sweet. I couldn’t put it down. I actually enjoyed the ending. Even if I could’ve used another 30 pages to flesh out some things.
Thank you to NetGalley for the Advanced Reader Copy.
‘There is no term for when one human is in a present, and one is in the past. There’s no way to express that one can live while the other cannot. No conjunction defined what it meant to survive the death of someone else.’
“Why do you look different? Something’s different.”
He laughed. “I’m drawn at. I’m not used to being presented in three dimensions. I think our brain is filling in some of the gaps maybe.”
“That makes sense.”
He laughed again. “That’s the part that makes sense to you. Jesus Christ.”
‘I didn’t feel like I was having some kind of mental break with reality, but I wasn’t sure what that would feel like. It had never happened before. The brief thought that Jace would find this fucking hilarious crossed my mind.’
‘I was immediately very conscious of the idea that everyone around me, looked like they were about to cry at any minute, but also were waiting for me to cry at any minute, and I wasn’t sure how to handle either of those ideas.’
‘I flipped through the notebook, desperately searching for more sacred text, more clues, or insight into the very real and honest Jason Van Noy. But it was page after page of blank nothingness – empty space of an unfinished life.’
October 30, 2025
Funny, sad, and heartfelt. 'These Are Not My Final Words' is an honest account of grief and how it can affect different people. Every chapter brought something new and unexpected. And while the theme is grief, this novel is so much more: it's a story of love, self-exploration, and acceptance.
These Are Not My Final Words follows Jonathan (Johnny), a screenwriter whose best friend, Jace, passed away suddenly. Johnny finds it incredibly difficult to move on – to accept that, from now on, he has to live his life without Jace in it, because, well, who is Johnny without Jace?
Johnny starts to see the animated Duck they created, Dick, AKA Jace, making him wonder whether he’s having a mental breakdown or if it’s normal to start hallucinating when grieving someone who was so close to you.
Samantha Ryan has written a sad but also funny account of the grieving process. It is messy. It is heartbreaking. But it can also be beautiful. The interactions between Johnny and Dick are hilarious, as Dick is, well, a dick.
In These Are Not My Final Words, the reader has a front-row seat to how grief works: how it can impact someone’s life – their relationships, work, and overall well-being. Samantha Ryan did an amazing job with this novel. While the theme may be considered dark, this novel is very uplifting.
The way Samantha used her quill is magnificent. This novel was easy to read and easy to like, and I recommend it to anyone who enjoys modern literature or has recently suffered a loss and needs a reminder they’re not alone – that ‘it’s okay to not be okay’.
These Are Not My Final Words follows Jonathan (Johnny), a screenwriter whose best friend, Jace, passed away suddenly. Johnny finds it incredibly difficult to move on – to accept that, from now on, he has to live his life without Jace in it, because, well, who is Johnny without Jace?
Johnny starts to see the animated Duck they created, Dick, AKA Jace, making him wonder whether he’s having a mental breakdown or if it’s normal to start hallucinating when grieving someone who was so close to you.
'I opened my eyes wide enough to see what was causing the problem and was staring straight at Dick, settling his feathers into the chair where Blake had been sitting only an hour before.'
Samantha Ryan has written a sad but also funny account of the grieving process. It is messy. It is heartbreaking. But it can also be beautiful. The interactions between Johnny and Dick are hilarious, as Dick is, well, a dick.
In These Are Not My Final Words, the reader has a front-row seat to how grief works: how it can impact someone’s life – their relationships, work, and overall well-being. Samantha Ryan did an amazing job with this novel. While the theme may be considered dark, this novel is very uplifting.
'I turned to her, watching the tears welling up. I didn’t cry when Jace died. I hadn’t cried about any of it. It was too sad to make me cry. Instead, I had been numb, stumbling around, observing it all without participating.'
The way Samantha used her quill is magnificent. This novel was easy to read and easy to like, and I recommend it to anyone who enjoys modern literature or has recently suffered a loss and needs a reminder they’re not alone – that ‘it’s okay to not be okay’.
October 22, 2025
These Are Not My Final Words had me laughing, crying, and laughing so hard I cried. I could not put this book down.
Johnny is getting ready to leave the funeral of his best friend and writing partner, Jace, when he finds an odd sight in the church. Dick the duck, the popular cartoon character created by Jace and Johnny is sitting there in a pew, holding Johnny's glasses. Thus starts this quirky yet heartrending story of grief and healing.
Ryan's writing pulled me in from the very first paragraph. I also deal with dark and hard life situations with humor so I was right there with Johnny through his grief. I absolutely loved Johnny and Dick. I know they are the same person but the way they played off each other to lighten the very heavy load of the story was perfection.
The only thing holding this story back for me was that the last third of the book felt a little rushed. Some plot points could have used a little more time to really hit home.
I am so glad I stumbled upon this ARC (thank you Netgalley and Samantha Ryan) and I will be singing it's praises for a long, long time.
Johnny is getting ready to leave the funeral of his best friend and writing partner, Jace, when he finds an odd sight in the church. Dick the duck, the popular cartoon character created by Jace and Johnny is sitting there in a pew, holding Johnny's glasses. Thus starts this quirky yet heartrending story of grief and healing.
Ryan's writing pulled me in from the very first paragraph. I also deal with dark and hard life situations with humor so I was right there with Johnny through his grief. I absolutely loved Johnny and Dick. I know they are the same person but the way they played off each other to lighten the very heavy load of the story was perfection.
The only thing holding this story back for me was that the last third of the book felt a little rushed. Some plot points could have used a little more time to really hit home.
I am so glad I stumbled upon this ARC (thank you Netgalley and Samantha Ryan) and I will be singing it's praises for a long, long time.
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October 19, 2025This is a wonderful exploration of grief, the challenges of supporting someone with mental illness, and learning to forgive yourself. While I found it more tragi- than comic, the premise of the imaginary duck did provide a humorous element that stopped this from feeling heavy. I think the themes are universal, and the well-drawn characters and innovative plot structure make them relatable and poignant.
October 27, 2025
This is a hard one to rate. I'm not going to say this was a BAD book, because it definitely wasn't. It has a really interesting premise and beautiful cover that caught my attention immediately. I love stories that explore grief and mental illness, and this book had that, along with an extra dose of codependency.
The things I liked:
- I enjoyed the non-linear approach. I liked how the main character dips in and out of time, before and after Jace. It can be a little confusing to follow at times, but I liked it!
- I liked the portrayal of Jace and the reality of his codependence with Johnny. The author does a great job at lacing together both really good aspects of Jace and really toxic aspects. It's so easy to make someone seem better than they were after they've died, and the author doesn't shy away from writing about Jace in the totality of who he was.
- In continuation of that, i really came to care about Jace and Johnny's bond.
- The portrayal of grief in general was really well done and empathetic.
The things I didn't like:
- I feel like there were subplots that were toyed with and dropped, or just not developed at all. I liked Yuto when he was introduced - I was excited about Yuto. But he doesn't really end up... Going anywhere and his relationship with Johnny doesn't feel like it matters. The plagiarism plotline doesn't go anywhere either, and it's even brought up by Dick how it's anticlimactic. Just because you point it out yourself doesn't make it good writing - it just feels lazy and a waste of page space.
- The characters in general were really flat and hard to distinguish from each other. There are SO many names introduced throughout the story and only like a quarter of them matter. Often a character would appear on a page and I'd be like 'shit - am I supposed to know who this is?' This isn't helped by the fact that there's little to NO character descriptions apart from MAYBE Riley, who we know is black.
- the ending was........ Unsatisfying.
I liked the general shape of the story and it's characters and it has a lot of potential, but unfortunately it just ended up falling really flat to me.
This was an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
The things I liked:
- I enjoyed the non-linear approach. I liked how the main character dips in and out of time, before and after Jace. It can be a little confusing to follow at times, but I liked it!
- I liked the portrayal of Jace and the reality of his codependence with Johnny. The author does a great job at lacing together both really good aspects of Jace and really toxic aspects. It's so easy to make someone seem better than they were after they've died, and the author doesn't shy away from writing about Jace in the totality of who he was.
- In continuation of that, i really came to care about Jace and Johnny's bond.
- The portrayal of grief in general was really well done and empathetic.
The things I didn't like:
- I feel like there were subplots that were toyed with and dropped, or just not developed at all. I liked Yuto when he was introduced - I was excited about Yuto. But he doesn't really end up... Going anywhere and his relationship with Johnny doesn't feel like it matters. The plagiarism plotline doesn't go anywhere either, and it's even brought up by Dick how it's anticlimactic. Just because you point it out yourself doesn't make it good writing - it just feels lazy and a waste of page space.
- The characters in general were really flat and hard to distinguish from each other. There are SO many names introduced throughout the story and only like a quarter of them matter. Often a character would appear on a page and I'd be like 'shit - am I supposed to know who this is?' This isn't helped by the fact that there's little to NO character descriptions apart from MAYBE Riley, who we know is black.
- the ending was........ Unsatisfying.
I liked the general shape of the story and it's characters and it has a lot of potential, but unfortunately it just ended up falling really flat to me.
This was an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
October 25, 2025
Samantha Ryan is "4 and 0" with her latest published book. She switches genres with ease, while keeping her trademark warmth and in-depth character studies.
I found the first quarter a little unmoored, not having her usual specificity of place, but as the book continued, I realized it was intentional. The end had me tearing up multiple times with the hard-won honesty.
I would highly recommend it for those who love the first season of Kevin Can F Himself, as it has
a similar sense of humor, or for those who enjoy the domestic stories of Liane Moriarty.
I found the first quarter a little unmoored, not having her usual specificity of place, but as the book continued, I realized it was intentional. The end had me tearing up multiple times with the hard-won honesty.
I would highly recommend it for those who love the first season of Kevin Can F Himself, as it has
a similar sense of humor, or for those who enjoy the domestic stories of Liane Moriarty.
October 12, 2025
Once I started the book I found that I didn’t want to put it down, I immediately fell into the story and it was like I was right there alongside Johnny. The way the story is told made the emotions that much deeper and the personal connections stronger. Grief and loss are tricky things to address, and this book takes a very raw and real look at those emotions, no matter how hard it may be to face them. The raw honesty around dealing with those emotions made the story relatable and had me crying by the end, and wanting more. It is a read that will leave you thinking about it once you close it. I only wish I could read it again, for the first time.
September 29, 2025
This book will make you laugh and cry.
September 22, 2025
If Wilfred and Looking for Alaska had a baby, this would be it.
In 2013, I reread LFA. I was 20, still trying to make sense of the sudden and terrible death of a close friend when we had just graduated high school. John Green's young people searching for sense in a senseless tragedy spoke to my young, grieving heart.
It's 2025, and I've been fortunate to have loved and had the misfortune of trying to make sense of more senseless tragedy..including the kinds in These are Not My Final Words. like Green, Samantha Ryan wrote grief as if my broken heart bled into her pages.
This book is everything I love about her writing. raw, honest, funny, devastating. I cried as much as I laughed and sighed.
I had the pleasure of an advance copy in exchange for my honest review.
In 2013, I reread LFA. I was 20, still trying to make sense of the sudden and terrible death of a close friend when we had just graduated high school. John Green's young people searching for sense in a senseless tragedy spoke to my young, grieving heart.
It's 2025, and I've been fortunate to have loved and had the misfortune of trying to make sense of more senseless tragedy..including the kinds in These are Not My Final Words. like Green, Samantha Ryan wrote grief as if my broken heart bled into her pages.
This book is everything I love about her writing. raw, honest, funny, devastating. I cried as much as I laughed and sighed.
I had the pleasure of an advance copy in exchange for my honest review.
October 3, 2025
Where to begin with this book?
Ryan has somehow taken very dark, traumatic subject matter and turned it into a masterpiece of a novel that will make you cry one minute and laugh the next. John is a screen writer, and each chapter of this book is written as if it is an episode of a sitcom. I truly felt like I was watching a tv show while reading this and felt that it was such a unique aspect that made this book so much more than just a sad novel about losing someone you love.
The grief of losing his best friend to suicide has consumed John’s life to the point that he is having flashbacks to times spent with Jace, and has manifested his best friend into their joint creation “Dick” and animated duck. As he navigates the loss of his friend and closest coworker, John is also learning that it is okay to not be okay, and that he is deserving of more than he thought.
The way that Ryan has handled the hard topics in this book is incredibly beautiful. She presents a main character that is in some ways struggling to find the new him, but is also open to talking about his grief and doing whatever he can to help himself mentally. The grief in this book is depicted so respectfully and feels so relatable to others who are experiencing grief.
This novel does cover some very heavy topics but it was done so wonderfully that I could not put it down.
Ryan has somehow taken very dark, traumatic subject matter and turned it into a masterpiece of a novel that will make you cry one minute and laugh the next. John is a screen writer, and each chapter of this book is written as if it is an episode of a sitcom. I truly felt like I was watching a tv show while reading this and felt that it was such a unique aspect that made this book so much more than just a sad novel about losing someone you love.
The grief of losing his best friend to suicide has consumed John’s life to the point that he is having flashbacks to times spent with Jace, and has manifested his best friend into their joint creation “Dick” and animated duck. As he navigates the loss of his friend and closest coworker, John is also learning that it is okay to not be okay, and that he is deserving of more than he thought.
The way that Ryan has handled the hard topics in this book is incredibly beautiful. She presents a main character that is in some ways struggling to find the new him, but is also open to talking about his grief and doing whatever he can to help himself mentally. The grief in this book is depicted so respectfully and feels so relatable to others who are experiencing grief.
This novel does cover some very heavy topics but it was done so wonderfully that I could not put it down.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
October 25, 2025
Sensitive, yet irreverent, These Are Not My Final Words is a study in contrasts. Most notably, it shows laughter and tears as two sides of the same coin, with the help of an obnoxious, quacking animation that is part intrusive thought and part indispensable companion. It mingles the absurd and profound, the fantastical and the mundane in a manner reminiscent of master storyteller Ray Bradbury, while delivering contemporary freshness and authenticity via its main character. Through his journey of confronting loss, Johnny convincingly embodies the anxieties and beauties of the human condition (along with the quirks of the creative mind) and lends pathos to a relationship that walks a wobbly tightrope between soulmate-level devotion and toxic codependence.
In short, These Are Not My Final Words is a funny and poignant portrait of grief, love in many facets, and self-discovery.
Thank you to the author and NetGalley for the advanced review copy.
In short, These Are Not My Final Words is a funny and poignant portrait of grief, love in many facets, and self-discovery.
Thank you to the author and NetGalley for the advanced review copy.
October 25, 2025
This was far more of a tragic story than a comedic one, but Dick the duck did provide some much appreciated comedic relief.
It’s a fantastic exploration of grief, of learning to forgive yourself, of the challenges that come with caring for someone with a mental illness.
Thank you Net Galley for the eARC.
It’s a fantastic exploration of grief, of learning to forgive yourself, of the challenges that come with caring for someone with a mental illness.
Thank you Net Galley for the eARC.
October 24, 2025
mostly a tragic story, but nothing with a giant, sarcastic, animated duck as a main character can fully be a tragedy, and the funny aspects really enliven this one. 5 stars. tysm for the arc.
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