Emočný tréning: Naučte sa rozvíjať 7 kľúčových vlastností emocionálnej zdatnosti

by Emily Anhalt, Ivana Krekáňová (Translator)

Staňte sa lepšími ľuďmi! Sedem krokov k emocionálnej zdatnosti.

Pracovať na svojej fyzickej kondícii je pre nás samozrejmé, ale pokiaľ ide o emocionálne zdravie, mnohí z nás ho nechávajú na náhodu. Čo keby sme mohli vytrénovať aj svoju myseľ a dosiahnuť tak spokojnosť a úspech? To je prísľub knihy Emočný tréning, ktorá vás krok za krokom prevedie rozvojom siedmich základných vlastností emocionálnej zdatnosti potrebných na to, aby ste sa stali lepšími lídrami, podnikateľmi a ľuďmi.

Genres: Nonfiction, Psychology, Mental Health, Self Help, Relationships, Personal Growth

304 pages, Hardcover

Published November 14, 2025

Reviews

[Marisa G. · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a psychologist, it's often hard for me to find a book that teaches me something new, but this one is it. Love that it's both thought-provoking and practical. I'm looking forward to trying more emotional pushups.

[Monnie · Rating 5 out of 5]

When I requested this book, it was mostly because I've been a student of psychology most of my life; so much so, in fact, that my undergraduate degree is in the I subject. Little did I know, however, that the direction my life would take at the time I started to read it would bring a few much-appreciated insights. Those life events, alas, also meant I was late in finishing and reviewing the book - a pre-release copy from the publisher in exchange for an honest review, for which I'm thankful (and very apologetic). But now I've finished and, with a little help from the book, I'm working to get my personal life back in order once again.

For openers, while it's easy to read, this isn't what I call a "pop-psych" book; you won't find cognitive distortions like "stinking thinking" or "analysis paralysis" (although I'll give the author, a clinical psychologist, points for tidbits like, "You only need to get up one more time than you fail"). Rather, she outlines seven steps for achieving emotional fitness: mindfulness, curiosity, self-awareness, resilience, empaathy, communication and playfulness. And she follows that up with a discussion of why we need to get better at each and presents specific steps for getting there.

That doesn't mean it will be a walk in the park. As she puts it, "Every single thing you want in your work and personal lives lives on the other side of discomfort." Examples taken from her personal experiences as a therapist are helpful, and exercises make it easier to put the suggestions to work in your own life so you can become, as the book description suggests, the best leader, entrepreneur and human you can be. At the end are resources like related books and the author's sources that back up what's in each chapter. I certainly learned from it, and I'm sure other readers will as well.

[Gary Ware · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is emotional fitness explained in a way that even skeptics will appreciate.

[Chloe Voorheis · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Flex Your Feelings” by Dr. Emily Anhalt is an effective tool for anyone looking to better understand themselves, and discovering more about your emotions. Dr. Anhalt's philosophy that you can work your emotional muscles like you work your physical muscles is a clever insight to how we can strengthen our emotions to be our best selves. Like physical exercise and training, there is no quick fix to becoming more emotionally intelligent. It’s something you have to practice and learn everyday.
Dr. Anhalt identifies seven traits for strengthening your emotional fitness. They are mindfulness, curiosity, self awareness, resilience, empathy, communication, and playfulness. For each trait she shares her personal experiences with her clients who were struggling particularly with that trait. She communicates simply how we as humans can be unaware that these emotions are hindering us to excel in our personal and professional lives. For each trait she gives her readers a “push up”, which is essentially a small exercise designed to help strengthen that particular emotional muscle.

I thoroughly enjoyed this reading experience. Not only did I learn more about my own emotions, but I have an eye opening realization of how I can go about making changes to better my emotional state when I’m stressed, or upset.
I enjoy the playful comparisons Dr. Anhalt makes with emotional fitness and physical fitness. Both relatable and innovative.

I would recommend this book to anyone! Whether you are looking to be more emotionally fit, or just want a better relationship with yourself and others around you. “ Flex Your Feelings” will give you the confidence to be your strongest self.

Thank you to NetGalley and Penguin Group Putnam for a copy of this book in exchange for a honest review.

[Sarah Bassett · Rating 4 out of 5]

read for book club and loved! great tools and authors writing was great. 4.5 ⭐️

[Ann Knuttila · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dr. Emily Anahlt is going to be the keynote speaker at the BWC annual event this year, which is why I read this book. I am so glad I did! This book is all about working on yourself in the workplace. It was a fast-paced read with easy to follow actionable steps to improve your mental health as a leader, entrepreneur and human. I took away so many little nuggets that I've already started implementing. Highly recommend!

[Megan Sampson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Rare that I give a nonfiction book 5 stars, but I loved this one

[Emily Ramey · Rating 5 out of 5]

I didn’t realize this had more to do with workplace settings, or at least the examples used were mainly workplace related. Either way I enjoyed listening to this and had some good insight to become a better employee and emotionally fit.

[Tiago Bandeira · Rating 5 out of 5]

Reading Flex Your Feelings felt like a conversation with a wise friend who gently encourages you to take better care of your emotional health. The way the author breaks down the 7 traits of emotional fitness is incredibly relatable and easy to understand. It’s the perfect blend of scientific knowledge and real-life applications. After finishing, I found myself more resilient in difficult situations and better able to process my emotions without feeling overwhelmed. This book has changed the way I view emotional growth.

[Tommy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Jam-packed with relatable stories, digestible insights, and invaluable action items, Flex Your Feelings is a standout in the emotional intelligence space. Dr. Anhalt’s narration brings warmth and clarity to the audiobook, leaving me genuinely motivated to level up my emotional fitness. I shared it with my entire company the moment I finished. This one earns a place on the shelf alongside Atomic Habits, Dare to Lead, Radical Candor, and Grit.

[Simone Stolzoff · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was great! Practical, approachable with just the right amount of anecdotes and patient stories to keep me turning the page. If you liked Maybe You Should Talk to Someone, you’ll love Flex Your Feelings!

[Sarah Peck · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've been a huge fan of Dr. Emily Anhalt since I came across her work on Twitter, and learned more about her through different groups and teachings she's offered. The work on emotions, emotional agility and flexibility, and strengthening your ability to navigate FEELINGS is so deeply needed. I hope that everyone gets a chance to encounter this work and help share it widely!

Feelings matter so much. But dealing with them? SO HARD.

Dr. Emily Anhalt helps us deal with feelings and get *emotionally* stronger. It's wild that we teach push-ups in schools but we still don't teach the ins and outs of how to deal with our emotional landscapes.

We know about physical exercise. But strengthening our emotional capacity? That's next level.

[Alissa Brandon · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love this author. Very knowledgeable and accessible. Love her concept of emotional pushups

[Reader · Rating 5 out of 5]

It helped me rethink how I show up for my team and for myself.

[Adam W. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Flex Your Feelings is the kind of book that sneaks up on you. You pick it up to support a friend, and by page three you’re highlighting lines and quietly rethinking how you relate to your emotions.

Emily writes with clarity, warmth, and an honesty that makes the science land and the stories resonate. As a coach, I’ve read a lot of books in this space—but few have hit me this personally. It gave me language, tools, and real permission to stop “toughing it out” and start tuning in.

If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, emotionally foggy, or like your feelings were getting in the way—this book flips the script. Your emotions aren’t obstacles, they’re signals.

Thank you, Emily, for writing the book we all needed. This is one I’ll be recommending for a long time.

[Vbj · Rating 5 out of 5]

Each chapter felt like a little mirror. Sometimes flattering, sometimes honest, always helpful.

[dan king · Rating 5 out of 5]

I enjoyed the way this book breaks down the concepts of seven traits of emotional fitness from personal relationships to professional leadership contexts. The examples throughout the book helped me recognize patterns in my own behavior and provided a clear pathway for growth. I really appreciated the way Dr. Anhalt balances psychological insights with strategies that are easy to put into action.

I’d definitely recommend this book for anyone looking to improve their leadership capabilities or improve their personal relationships.

[James Hewitt · Rating 5 out of 5]

Flex Your Feelings is a refreshingly practical and science-informed guide to building emotional intelligence like a muscle: something to be trained, not just understood. Dr. Emily Anhalt distils deep psychological insight into a clear 7-step plan that feels both doable and impactful, whether you're leading a team, navigating relationships, or simply trying to manage the mental load of everyday life. A standout for anyone serious about sustainable performance and wellbeing.

[Juliana Tichota · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’ve always struggled with emotional overwhelm, and this book gave me the permission and guidance to embrace my emotions without judgment. The practical tips helped me understand how emotional fitness is like working out...it’s a skill you build with practice. I love that the author combines humor with real insights, making this a book you not only read but also actively use in daily life. If you want to stop running from your feelings and start embracing them, this is the book for you.

[Reader · Rating 5 out of 5]

Really enjoyed the thoughtful and practical insight that Dr. Anhalt brought to this book! It brings actionable and accessible ways to do the hard work of creating daily exercises that help instill lasting and positive changes for your mental health. I highly recommend giving it a read.

[Erin Samueli · Rating 5 out of 5]

Equal parts science and soul. That’s a rare combo, and it works.

[Doug Siebum · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is fantastic! It provides valuable insight and tips that you can apply to your life today.

[Grokjes · Rating 5 out of 5]

absolutely loved it! Dr Anhalt is a genius and I love her approach - it makes working on your mental health SO much less daunting. def recommend.

[Danny Nguyen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Highly recommend this book! You exercise your body, now exercise your mind/emotions! Helpful for anyone interested in have better relationships with others and yourself.

[Jason Milen · Rating 5 out of 5]

This isn’t just a self-help book, it’s an experience. I laughed, I reflected, and I finished it feeling better equipped to handle life.

[Anna Goldfarb · Rating 5 out of 5]

It’s practical without being preachy, deep without being heavy. Loved it!

[Jezzeri · Rating 4.75 out of 5]

Discomfort allows for growth, learning, and excitement. When you make that leap and keep at it, what was once seemingly impossible will become doable. Many people turn away from discomfort because they underestimate their tolerance for it. When you feel uncomfortable and want to move away from it, take a deep breath, feel your feelings, and remind yourself that you can do hard things.

Here are prompts when you're feeling uncomfortable:
1. Try labeling your discomfort
2. What is the worst thing that can happen? Play out the worst case scenario. Then play out the best case scenario and the most likely scenario.
3. Ask for support if you need it
4. Remember that this feeling won't last forever; it is survivable
5. Remind yourself that challenging this discomfort head on is going to make you stronger and help you grow

Being curios is the opposite of being defensive.Rather than fighting to keep uncomfortable information out, you're asking o take it in. That generally involves asking a lot of questions. Curiosity helps you think more strategically, have more collaborative relationships, and increase trust.

To increase curiosity, listen, question everything, and take in what you hear.

We can only view the world through the lens of our own experience. Learning to trace what you're feeling from moment to moment will help you respond appropriately instead of instinctively, taking full responsibility for yourself and your actions. The more you know regarding self-awareness, the more you'll realize you don't know. There is always more to understand about yourself. When you learn to let down your defenses and get curious, you're in a position to see what's behind those defenses and get to know yourself in a deeper and more honest way. Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will rule your life. With self-awareness, you will come to realize that you are creating your reality in so many ways. Once you realize it, you can change it.

What are your biggest strengths and superpowers? What are your biggest personal struggles that need your attention? What motivates you and gives you a sense of purpose? How do you think your friends, family, and coworkers see you?

When you're self-aware, you will make better decisions. You will be more patient, understanding, and resilient, so you can handle frustrating moments and better manage your emotions. You will have a larger reservoir of willpower and determination to achieve your most important goals. You will be a more confident, successful, well-rounded leader and show up better for your colleagues and coworkers and at home, you will be more present for the people you love.

Resilience is the ability to bounce forward through setbacks and failures. Resilience is the ability to acknowledge whatever challenge you're facing, reflect on it, learn from it, and use it as a springboard to grow into a better version of yourself. Resilient people don't let failure stop them; they push forward, but they do so thoughtfully, with their eyes wide open, and with an honest perspective about how they feel and what they need. The true key to this trait is adaptability. The most successful are those who can adapt to a changing environment.

Obstacles to resilience: anxiety, your inner critic, burnout, shame, toxic positivity, fear of success

Use these as a reminders as you work on your resilience:
1. Acknowledge that setbacks, struggles, and pain are inevitable parts of life. You can't ignore them away
2. Allow yourself to feel emotions and remind yourself that you have gone through tough things before. Don't forget to grieve
3. Offer yourself compassion and patience while being accountable for your actions
4. Lean into gratitude. It reminds you what you still have and allows you to appreciate what you had before you lost it

To cultivate empathy, expose yourself tt as many different cultures and experiences as you possibly can. When you step outside of your normal life and immerse yourself in novel contexts, your'e forced to look through a different lens. They key is to go in with an open mindset and an eagerness to see the world through perspectives unlike your own. Diverse experiences rewire your brain, making you a more flexible empath. Expand your horizons--watch a documentary, read a book, take a class, go somewhere new.

As important as it is to empathize with others, it's also vital to turn your compassion inward. Empathy for yourself means lettering yourself feel your emotions, supporting yourself through difficult moments, and recognizing that imperfection is part of the human experience. Self-compassion also involves treating yourself with care, not just kind words. As your love for yourself grows, you will also attract and accept more love into your life from others. Leaning into empathy will transform your relationships, and as you better understand your needs and boundaries, as well as the needs and boundaries of others, you'll be in a much better position to solve problems and collaborate through conflict.

Communication is the ability to accurately, directly, and thoughtfully share your feelings, boundaries, needs, and expectations with others. Connection does not exist without communication. Communicating effectively is uncomfortable but it is important to remind yourself that you are likely to endure all kinds of discomfort by not communicating. To communicate effectively, you must first lower your defenses. Curiosity allows for a conversation to go in both directions. The more authentically curious you are, the better at communicating you'll be. Understanding your communication style and what is or isn't working about it is an important first step to improving it. Communicating with empathy means having some understanding of the other person's feelings and needs.

Listen as much as you speak. Leave some room. Silence allows space for reflecting, processing information, and considering responses thoughtfully. Watch your tone. Show, don't tell. Body language is a critical aspect of nonverbal communication--it conveys emotions, attitudes, and intentions through physical cues.

Playfulness is the ability to imaginatively explore the realm of what's possible in any situation without attachment to specific outcomes. Everything that has ever been created in this world has come about as a result of play. Play in its purest form is an unbounded, free-flowing experimentation. With play, the means is more important than the end. The very act of being playful opens up a world of possibilities. Playfulness can ignite you. Being playful is about granting yourself the permission to think divergently, try on new perspectives, and fail without catastrophic consequences. It paradoxically engages you more fully in the present moment while expanding your capacity to envision alternative futures. Play allows you to purposefully disengage from the stresses of daily life in order to engage with a refreshed, more vibrant spirit.

One of the most important hallmarks of a strong mental and emotional health is the ability to exist in the gray. Analytic psychology outlines the type of emotional development that is characterized by a person's ability not to think in extremes--to accept the fact that nothing and no one is all good or all bad. To strengthen this trait of emotional fitness, work on becoming a "yes, and..." person. Pay attention to moments when you can "yes, and..." those around you When someone shares an idea or suggestion, respond with "Yes, and..." and build on their contribution. Practice suspending judgment and embracing the possibilities presented by others.

[jula · Rating 5 out of 5]

𝐒𝐏𝐑𝐀𝐖𝐍𝐎ŚĆ 𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐂𝐉𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐍𝐀.
ᴊᴀᴋ ᴡᴢᴍᴏᴄɴɪć 7 ꜰɪʟᴀʀóᴡ ᴢᴅʀᴏᴡɪᴀ ᴩꜱyᴄʜɪᴄᴢɴᴇɢᴏ.

autor: 𝐝𝐫. 𝐄𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐀𝐧𝐡𝐚𝐥𝐭
wydawnictwo: 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐮𝐬

[𝐰𝐬𝐩ół𝐩𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐚 𝐫𝐞𝐤𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐨𝐰𝐚]

Do książek psychologicznych miałam wiele podejść i za każdym razem szybko mi się nudziły. Zawsze miałam wrażenie, jakby mówili do mnie w jakimś nieodkrytym języku, przez co niczego nie rozumiałam. Jakie było więc moje zaskoczenie, kiedy trafiłam na książkę dr Emily Anhalt, od której nie byłam w stanie się oderwać.

Jest to pozycja ukazująca po kolei 7 filarów zdrowia psychicznego: 𝐮𝐰𝐚ż𝐧𝐨ść, 𝐜𝐢𝐞𝐤𝐚𝐰𝐨ść, 𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐨ś𝐰𝐢𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐦𝐨ść, 𝐨𝐝𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐧𝐨ść 𝐩𝐬𝐲𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐳𝐧𝐚, 𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐚, 𝐤𝐨𝐦𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐤𝐚𝐜𝐣𝐚 𝐢 𝐳𝐚𝐛𝐚𝐰𝐚. Dowiadujemy się, w jaki sposób możemy wzmacniać każdy z nich, prowadząc do sprawności emocjonalnej.

Zacznę od tego, co dla mnie najważniejsze – wszystko było napisane prostym językiem. Nie musiałam się trudzić podczas czytania, dlatego cała lektura była bardzo przyjemna.

Kolejnym plusem było pokazanie każdego filaru na podstawie prawdziwych pacjentów i ich sytuacji. Pomagało to w dokładnym zrozumieniu znaczenia np. uważności czy empatii, bo mimo że wydaje nam się to logiczne, czasem możemy odbierać je całkiem inaczej.

Bardzo podobały mi się również wstawki zachęcające czytelnika do działania, w których krok po kroku opisywano, jak następnym razem możesz spróbować się zachować, jakie pytanie zadać, a czego unikać.

To, co mi się również podobało, to sposób, w jaki autorka angażowała czytelnika i sprawiała, że można było poczuć, że ta książka jest naprawdę skierowana właśnie do nas. Przykładowo, w części, w której przedstawiona została ciekawość, na końcu dostaliśmy zadanie, które realnie każdy z nas może wykonać. Polegało ono na wysłaniu wiadomości do osoby, z której opinią się liczymy, z prośbą, aby napisała, co według niej robimy super, a co moglibyśmy zrobić o 10% lepiej. Takie zadania sprawiały, że nie czułam się tylko odbiorcą kolejnych informacji, ale naprawdę mogłam odnieść je do siebie. Dzięki temu z wielką chęcią sięgałam po dalsze rozdziały.

Podsumowując, jest to książka, która pozwoli Wam stopniowo wzmacniać swoją sprawność emocjonalną. Dowiecie się wielu ciekawych rzeczy, a przez samą lekturę wręcz popłyniecie.

[ReadOrBeRead · Rating 5 out of 5]

An actual game-changer of a book.

I picked up Flex Your Feelings expecting another self-help book with recycled advice, and ended up with countless highlighted ideas and notes in margins. This book is smart, honest, and genuinely useful.

My favorite thing about it: the mix of thought-provoking ideas, and actual tools for how to make change. The author calls the exercises "emotional pushups" and they're short, thoughtful ways to "flex your emotional muscles." I’ve already added a few into my daily routine, and I can see what the author means about small gains eventually leading to big change.

The tone is warm and encouraging without being fluffy, and the author clearly understands what it’s like to navigate stress, self-doubt, and messy emotions, especially if you're a success and growth-oriented person.

If you’ve ever wanted a guide to help you strengthen your emotional muscles (without needing to meditate on a mountaintop), this is it. Highly recommend.

[Yishai Manischewitz · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dr. Anhalt’s Flex Your Feelings shines as a vibrant master-class in emotional literacy, channeling her clinical expertise into an engaging roadmap for everyday resilience. Many readers will recognize her from the clear, compassionate psychoeducation she shares on Instagram and TikTok, and that same warmth radiates through every page. Each chapter blends research-backed insights with instantly usable exercises, making even complex psychological concepts feel refreshingly accessible. The result is a wholehearted celebration of feeling work that leaves you empowered to meet life’s ups and downs with curiosity, courage, and genuine confidence. Highly recommended!