It's Gonna Get Messy: An Unfiltered True Story of Heartbreak, Healing, and Reinvention

by Becca Eve Young

She built the life she was supposed to want—a high-flying career, a marriage, a carefully crafted plan. Until everything came crashing down. A dear friend dies. Her marriage unravels. She’s laid off while alone in a foreign country as a global pandemic hits. Then, just when she thinks it can’t get worse, she gets the call that her father has died.

Stranded in rural Mexico, cracked open by grief, she experiences a supernatural encounter under the full moon that sets her on a wild, often hilarious, sometimes heartbreaking journey. From car crashes and chaotic hookups, to silent meditation retreats, psychedelic revelations, robberies, and mystical moments—this is what happens when life blows up and a woman dares to say yes to becoming someone new.

Becca’s journey is raw, hilarious, and a deeply human memoir that reads like fiction. What starts as a freefall becomes a wild quest to untangle grief, rewrite old stories, and rediscover her own worth. Told with spiritual sass, hard-won wisdom, and gut-punching honesty, this incredible true story is for anyone who’s ever felt lost in their own life and is searching for more.

For fans of Glennon Doyle, Chelsea Handler, Gabrielle Bernstein, and Elizabeth Gilbert, this is a raw, funny, and soul-stirring invitation to remember who you are—and reclaim the freedom to become who you were always meant to be.

Genres: Memoir

439 pages, Kindle Edition

Published September 30, 2025

Reviews

[Roslyn McLarty]

I wish I could give this book 10/5 stars. It made me laugh, cry AND spiritually expanded me. It was so relatable yet inspiring at the same time.

Becca is a gifted writer who pulls you in with her raw honesty and keeps you there with her humor, compelling story telling and her depth. I saw parts of myself in her story, which was both deeply comforting and enlightening.

One moment I was cringing about the drinking and dating stories (so relatable) and the next I was feeling motivated to book myself on the next silent meditation retreat or try plant medicine in order to connect with myself and the universe in new ways.

I can tell this book came from such a deeply connected and grounded place and it’s a gift to all of us that get to read it. Thank you Becca.

[Cindy Liberman]

I devoured this book in a few days after getting it! The very first scene is funny, open and relatable, and I was hooked from there. It's Gonna Get Messy made me realize how many people share their vulnerabilities in a superficial and curated way. This book is truly honest - taking me into Becca's most vulnerable, funny, embarrassing and sometimes dark moments. It's like a coming of age book for your 30's. If you're on a journey of self-discovery or just feeling stuck or burned out - this is a great read. I believe Becca's journey will truly help me on my own path.

[Anne Jisca]

This memoir follows the author through her "life crisis" which followed the pandemic. It follows her through ongoing unemployment, flying to/from Mexico and the USA, dating experiences, death of her father, and more.

For myself, and based on my own past experiences and "life crisis", I could not connect with the author at all. I don't like rating memoirs, as everyone deserves to have their story heard if they wish, but this felt very privileged without her realization of her privilege.

[Charlotte's Maple Library]

Thank you NetGalley for this ARC opportunity!

With beautifully poetic and deep prose, the author tells a vulnerable tale of her spiritual awakening and the mess that got her to that point. I so enjoyed the author's POV, her tone, humor

Let me start with that this book suggests it is both autobiography and a story of woman finding her way through the uncaring corporate world, oppressive societal and religious expectations, and all withing the exceptionally challenging world of international travel during covid shut downs.

I gave it 4 stars for 2 reasons:

1.) I was provided an ARC in audiobook format. The author narrates and her voice is full of life and her heart was raw in many parts; however, other parts felt forced and inconsistent. I love hearing the author's POV, but the merging of both biography and story is lost during more neutral parts of the story, feeling stale in the narration. Almost like youre reading aloud for a school report. I wonder whether a professional narrator may see and articulate the nuances with more consistency.

2.) This is a long story that dives deeply into a short few years of the authors experience. This does include views into upbringing and past, but the majority is based on her late 30s to early 40s. There were some parts of the story beautifully and deeply described while some part were not as explored and it made some of the Mexico travel and living portions feel long. The final journey at the end was beautiful and I wonder if some of the other descriptions could have been shortened. The book is also marketed at Chelsea Handler level humor. I would say thats a stress to liken it to a professional comedian BUT it is still quite funny, maybe just the wrong comparison.

Overall, I truly loved the book. This is a more critical review, but I value her vulnerability and relatability, along with her beautifully written style. I would suggest this book to anyone going through the crisis of identity; searching for validation of a dissatisfaction for corporate culture; or wanting to learn what loving yourself looks like at 40.

[Janell DeGennaro]

Great book about self-reflection and self-healing in this busy world we live in. The author undergoes a fascinating spiritual journey in life that is admirable, forcing the reader to look at their perspectives and life choices.

[Kennedy Purcell]

~ARC Review~

There’s something so intimate and special about listening to an audiobook memoir that’s narrated by the author, and It’s Gonna Get Messy truly captures that feeling. From the very beginning, it felt personal, like being let into someone’s inner world.

When I saw Becca Eve Young’s memoir being compared to Untamed by Glennon Doyle, I knew I had to give it a shot. Memoirs are one of my favorite genres because there’s nothing like listening to and learning from other people’s lived experiences, and this one also came at the perfect time for me.

I was freshly unemployed, thinking the worst about myself, and unsure (and honestly, still unsure) what career step is next. There was something incredibly comforting about listening to Becca talk about finding herself when she didn’t really know what the next move was anymore. Her story met me exactly where I was.

Amid ending a long-term relationship, losing her job during COVID, moving to Mexico, experiencing dating in a new country, and losing her dad, Becca never gives up. She gets deeply honest with herself through soul-searching and holistic explorations, and invites the reader to sit with her through the messiest parts of her life.

Her writing is so descriptive and beautiful that I could easily picture every scenario in my mind. She has such a way with words without ever trying to sound like she has it all figured out, which made the story feel even more real and relatable.

Funny, honest, vulnerable, intelligent, and determined, this audiobook often felt less like listening to a memoir and more like FaceTiming a friend. It takes real courage to write out your entire story, especially your supposed failures, but Becca shows that even our lowest moments can lead us toward growth and enlightenment.

This book is a reminder that the messiest parts of life often have the most to teach us.

Thank you so much to NetGalley & @beccaeveyoung for this amazing ARC, and to Becca for taking time to chat, I’m truly grateful for the opportunity to experience this story.

[Amber K]

Before even beginning to read Becca’s book, I already felt her story was going to be relatable to not just myself but others and that was just from reading a summary blurb.

Once I began to read her story I could tell her writing wasn’t going to be like an actual story the reader is reading after being perfected, but instead it was as if she was personally telling her story to me in an unfiltered and raw manner. Becca’s story will resonate with many many people who read it!

From start to finish I would catch myself nodding in agreement with situations she spoke of in her story that have resonated in my personal life experiences. There were times on and off I would find my eyes filling with tears from the rawness in certain parts of the book.

Becca’s story has opened my eyes even more to how we should approach life and what we’ve been through in our past by seeing how our past experiences effect who we are and how we look at and approach life in present time. Sharing her story was not only spiritual but brave and by her doing just that, she shows that we too have the courage inside us to share our stories, to embrace our imperfections, and so much more.

Ultimately, walking away after reading her story, I have a renewed sense of self reflection, needing to slow down in life, opening myself up more to healing and hope.

Thank you Becca for sharing your story! I will carry all I’ve learned from reading it with me for a long time to come.

[قوتخرنة]

So hear me out. I genuinely adored this book. I liked it a lot more than I thought I would actually. With the comp authors listed as Gabby Bernstein, Rachel Hollis, and Elizabeth Gilbert, I wasn’t sure how I would feel about this because, well, I don’t like any of those other authors.

And even though I can see the relationship to the messages those three admittedly strong women share, this book was more refreshing, self-deprecating, and thought-provoking. Becca doesn’t make herself sound perfect. Quite the opposite.

I definitely wouldn’t call it exciting or adventurous. In fact, I think that’s what makes this book so special. Becca is just living her regular life. And it evolves into her living her best life. It’s simple, and that’s what makes it so easy to relate to. Well, her story is simple, her emotions and thought processes are definitely not! Her perspective shifts back-and-forth like her moods. And she takes us as the readers along for the ride. Getting into the head of someone like this is not something I’m accustomed to in my reading and it was definitely jarring for me to read. That being said, I greatly appreciated the ending and all of the introspection That came with all of the lessons learned.

This book is proof that you don’t have to run off and climb Everest, meditate naked on a mountain, milk yaks, or join a monastery to pick up on some spiritual wisdom to share with others.

While I can’t say too much of this book was very relatable for me in my life, because we have such different backgrounds, that’s actually a pro for me because that’s the whole point of reading, isn’t it? To live other people‘s lives? but I think it will be very relatable for many many people.

Definitely a solid four stars. Well done for a debut!

[Robert L]

The author’s writing style immediately drew me in — vivid, descriptive, and crafted with real skill. What stood out most for me, though, was how much I personally connected with her story. Having recently left the corporate world myself and now living in Southern Baja California, I found so many of her reflections resonating with my own life.

Her background also felt familiar. Like me, she grew up with old-fashioned, often codependent parents, and she writes about that experience with honesty and clarity. I especially appreciated her openness around experimenting with plant medicine, as that mirrors parts of my own journey as well.

Overall, this book felt less like reading someone else’s story and more like having a mirror held up to parts of my own. It’s beautifully written, deeply relatable, and an important contribution for anyone navigating transformation, healing, or personal growth.

[Natalie]

It's Gonna Get Messy is a raw and emotionally honest memoir about grief, identity loss, divorce, and rebuilding your life when everything falls apart.
She explores heartbreak, spirituality, reckless decisions, and personal reinvention with a voice that is vulnerable, funny, and refreshingly unfiltered. Rather than offering a polished “self-help” journey, Becca embraces the chaos and uncertainty that comes with real transformation.
It’s funny, light hearted & inspiring. I felt connected with Becca & like I walked alongside her throughout her many ups & downs. She gracefully admits her mistakes & shares her learnings along the way.
Healing is never straight forward or simple - & we are reminded of this constantly throughout this book.

[Jamie Hallen]

Wow! This book was incredible for multiple reasons.

First, the story: I was hooked from literally the first page. The story was honest, fun, heartbreaking, and courageous. It takes one on the rollercoaster of life, and one that is similar to what most of us experience. There were so many connections that I was able to make along the way.

Next, the writing: The writing of this book is impeccable. I found this a very easy read... a page-turner, if you will. The words flowed smoothly, and the transitions between scenes and chapters were seamless. When I read this, I felt that I was with her every step of the way!

[Stephanie M.]

I seriously almost read it in one day because the pages just kept turning. Her writing just flows & the stories are that good. Initially, reading the jacket, I thought it was a little daring to liken the writing to authors like Chelsea Handler & Elizabeth Gilbert but the more I read, the more I felt it. Becca was having her eat, pray, love moment & I was totally here for it.

I shed many very real and very heartfelt tears feeling so connected to Becca’s experience as a daughter losing her beloved Dad.

I’m looking forward to sharing this book with friends & suggesting it to my book club. I don’t think I’ll ever go on a silent meditation retreat but I sort of feel like I already did because I got to experience it through reading Becca’s book. I’m finding pockets of joy & carving out moments in the rat race of life to stay centered & use my breath to connect back to myself. Working in Healthcare requires resilience to stave off burnout & Becca’s book found me at a good time.

[Deena Fisher]

I almost never write reviews, but THIS BOOK absolutely deserves GIANT ACCOLADES! From the very first page, I was swept into the author's authentic and insightful journey. I cried, I laughed, I had SO MANY "ah-ha!" moments! I learned so much - and even deep insight and 'knowings' in my own life. So grateful to have gone on this raw and wonderful journey! THE WORLD NEEDS MORE OF THIS ENERGY! Bravooooo! This is a brave and highly entertaining story that I HIGHLY RECOMMEND diving into! Serious kudos!

[Dorota]

I don’t usually pick up non-business books, but Becca’s story caught my attention right away. What stood out to me was how real and relatable it felt — not just her experiences, but the people and situations she described that reminded me of myself and those around me. It’s honest, funny, and human in a way that makes you feel like you’re right there with her. A refreshing read that pulled me in more than I expected.

[Bobbi Mullins]

This book takes you on a journey, walking through the authors messy middle but in the process also connecting it with your own. It's about creating your path and realizing that you are the only one that can walk it. It's not going to be or feel linear, it's messy... but that's also what makes it beautiful. Also, the twist at the end with her Dad, makes it feel full circle while also being a fresh breath of beginning again.

[Whitney]

I absolutely adore this book! I interviewed Becca for my podcast, Women Waken, and she was kind enough to send me a copy beforehand. Right away the book sucks you in, a mix of fun, touching, spiritual, inspiring, and emotional. You can feel Becca's Soul come through in her writing; vibrant, authentic, and kind hearted. This book is a must read for personal growth and gentle guidance on this MESSY ride of life!

[Mindy Bormann]

Becca’s story could be one of our stories but most are too scared to step out of our comfort zone. I could relate to Becca in so many ways though out this story. This story teaches you life, love and death, and the good, the bad and the ugly. I highly recommend this book as a must read.

[Jennifer Sweeney]

Wow, what a debut! Thank you again. Algorithm for placing this book in my feed. (Or maybe it’s the Source). I highly recommend this book, especially to other midlife women who are finding their way to a more authentic, free self. There was a lot in this book I could relate to as far as grappling with the ways I was parented created dysfunctional programming in my brain, leading to repetitious less than healthy patterns and a deep discomfort with myself. Becca is far more adventurous than me! I was delighted to see that she later developed a belief that mediation and dropping in to her heart space was a way to connect within so much more so than psychedelic experimentation. I could relate to sorting through and deconstructing from the religion of one’s childhood, though mine looked different than hers did, and I remain more faith based than universe/spiritual. This book was a goldmine of beautiful reminders for us as evolving humans and especially as women. I had a hard time putting it down and made lots of highlights.