The Buddy System: A Modern Man’s Guide to Mastering Friendship and Leveling Up Your Life

by Matt Ritter, Aaron Karo

Let's face it—making and keeping friends as a grown man isn't easy. Between careers, relationships, and life's responsibilities, meaningful male friendships often take a backseat. But what if there were a proven system to help you build the social connections you've been missing?

Welcome to The Buddy A Modern Man's Guide to Mastering Friendship and Leveling Up Your Life, created by comedians, lifelong pals, and hosts of the wildly popular “Man of the Year” podcast, Matt Ritter and Aaron Karo. This groundbreaking audio guide provides a step-by-step framework for making new friends and strengthening existing relationships—all while keeping it real, relatable, and occasionally ridiculous.

Drawing from their nearly four decades of friendship, Matt and Karo break down the art and science of male friendship into simple, actionable strategies that actually work. From overcoming the dreaded "friendship recession" to mastering the delicate art of getting another dude's digits (without making it weird), they tackle the challenges that keep men from forming deeper connections.

You'll learn how

- Break through limiting beliefs that hold you back from making new friends

- Find your "Third Place"—the key to meeting like-minded people

- Level up casual acquaintances into real friendships

- Show up for your buddies during both good times and bad

- Create meaningful and lasting traditions that keep your crew connected

- Avoid the awkward “We should hang out sometime” conversation you never actually follow through on

The Buddy System isn't just about making friends—it's about becoming the kind of friend people actually want in their lives. Through hilarious stories, research-backed insights, and proven techniques, friendship experts Matt and Karo will help you build your "social fitness" just like you’d hit the gym and build physical fitness.

So, whether you're looking to expand your social circle, deepen existing friendships, or simply feel more connected, The Buddy System is the roadmap you need to get off the sidelines and back in the game. No more settling for surface-level relationships or letting great friendships fade away. It's time to level up your social life…and your life, period.

Genres: Audiobook

Audible Audio

Published October 23, 2025

About the author

Dr. Matt Ritter is a botany professor in the Biological Sciences Department at Cal Poly in San Luis Obispo, California, where he studies California’s native plants and trees in the urban forest. He’s the author of several books, including the funniest and best-selling guide to California’s urban forest, A Californian’s Guide to the Trees among Us. He won the Cal Poly Excellence in Teaching Award and the International Society of Arboriculture Award for Excellence in Education. He’s an avid woodworker, mason, and gardener.

Reviews

[Donna Simpson · Rating 3 out of 5]

I listened to this to get a better insight into how men think about friendship. I found that so much applied to me and my other female friends...especially as we get older. Don't be put off that this is targeted toward men. The advice is great for both sexes.

[William Bennett · Rating 4 out of 5]

I've never listened to these guys' podcast, but I stumbled upon this audiobook that anthologizes some of their content on Audible, and thought I would give it a listen. I've devoted a lot of thought to my friendships specifically and male friendships in general over the years, and it's been a recurrent topic of conversation with my closest guy friends over the last year as we've sought to deepen our own connections and bring more people into the circle we've cultivated.

This gets four stars for being engaging and fun—the guys seem like they would be really entertaining to hang out with—but I also found it less than life-changing. Some of that is the work I've already put in to learn some of these ideas about making and keeping friends. The biggest takeaway for anyone, I think, and the most important thing to reiterate about relationships in general, is how key vulnerability is to creating strong connections. Being real is the surest way to make and keep friends.

[Craig Carignan · Rating 4 out of 5]

It was a pretty good book. I was surprised.

[Tommy Piowaty · Rating 4 out of 5]

I love these guys! And this was a really fun lesson for a book. And honestly, I took a lot of great notes. This is killer for friendships and evangelism.