It's Only Temporary: The Good News and the Bad News of Being Alive

by Evan Handler

What if you were supposed to die, but you didn't? And what if, years later, your precious second chance didn't turn out anything like you thought it would? That's the journey Evan Handler experiences, and the one he explores in It's Only The Good News and the Bad News of Being Alive. In a collection of funny, offbeat, and poignant autobiographical essays, Handler moves beyond the supposedly incurable illness he triumphed over in his mid-twenties--only to tumble through his thirties and forties in search of ever elusive love and happiness. From bold attempts to rekindle his acting career to hapless efforts to run faster around New York's Central Park reservoir, from bizarre Internet dates to twenty-seven breakups (involving only ten women), Handler careens through his against-all-odds existence. Always searching for meaning in his unlikely survival, he shares stories of sadistic junior high school gym teachers, bullying wannabe Hollywood moguls, returned engagement rings, and Europeans' fascination with American bathroom habits. Picking up ten years after his first book, Time on Fire, Handler again uses what the New York Times calls his laceratingly funny and revealing storytelling skills to weave twenty-one new tales into a defiantly unconventional memoir. Consistently witty and insightful, Handler's stories shift effortlessly from the comedic to the profound, musing with equal intensity on the existence of God and his experiences with TV stardom. Then, just when it seems he's failed to make the most of his astonishing second chance, Handler finds his way to miracles even greater than the ones that saved his life. His memoir describes his journey from darkness to light, from yearning to gratitude, and in so doing succeeds as both a stirring love story and a classic coming-of-age tale. It's Only Temporary celebrates the transformation of a boy to man--even if it look Handler more than forty years to get there.

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, Humor, Biography

Kindle Edition

First published May 1, 2008

About the author

IT'S ONLY TEMPORARY: THE GOOD NEWS AND THE BAD NEWS OF BEING ALIVE, by actor/author Evan Handler.

Evan Handler is an actor best known as Harry Goldenblatt from HBO’s Sex and the City and the author of the critically acclaimed memoir Time on Fire: My Comedy of Terrors. Handler currently co-stars in Showtime’s hit series Californication co-starring David Duchovny. His past acting credits include Lost, The West Wing, Ransom, and Taps. Handler also has written for Elle, Mirabella, O, the Oprah Magazine, USA Weekend, and The New Yorker.

Reviews

[mehg-hen · Rating 1 out of 5]

"I can die now because I am married, have a child, and am a little famous. Also, all my stuff is nice. When it comes to women, I trade up." Any normal other person would probably love this book. I would like a book that says "I can die now because I am amazed by figure skating and I ate an incredible pastrami sandwich." I am going to get a pastrami sandwich from a Zagat rated deli with a bunch of old people immediately because the nap I couldn't take didn't make me less mad.

I would like to read his first book. I would bet this is a great book to hear read.

[Jeff · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read Evan's second book first because I couldn't find a copy of the first book in good shape (I since have.) This one picks up where the last one left off and while we whould be happy for Evan being free and clear of Leukemia, the book is full of his post trumatic trails. I grew up in the same town as Evan so when he mentions my middle school gym teach or one of my best friends older brothers death, well, it really hits home. Sadly, when I finished the book I felt like I had read Evan's attempt to Set The Record Straight on his personal life. Still, it is an interesting life and he is a great story teller - telling a tale as if you and he were sitting at a bar. We go back and forth in time, weaving the story of his life rather than rolling it out ina straight line.

[Jenny (Reading Envy)]

Abandoned because I wasn't really connecting with his stories. Amazing to recover from leukemia and be a reasonably successful actor, but I'm not sure I cared.

[Kris · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is one of those books that was there for me at the right time, when everything seemed chaotic and unnerving. Handler writes in a charming way about a variety of heavy topics and provides some great life insight. Pick this up when you're feeling down.

[Charlene Elovitz]

Jan. 2020

[Yoav · Rating 1 out of 5]

Self-indulgent, offensively time-wasting, truly awful

[Daniel Stolfi · Rating 5 out of 5]

Helped me a lot through my cancer experience when I was twenty-five years old. Read it in 2008 so it may be out of date for new survivors or people currently going through cancer. But a great book about overcoming hardships. Inspired me to write my memoir too!

[Gypsy Lady · Rating 3 out of 5]

Page xi
I’ve noticed that each utterance I make offers infinite opportunities for misunderstanding. No matter how clearly I think I’ve put my message across, I’ll be surprised to learn I’ve failed to convey what it is I meant, or to anticipate the prisms of each and every reader’s mind.

Page 7
Then he added, “Of course, I think a person’s emotional health has a lot to do with their physical health, so I wasn’t surprised to hear you’d gotten sick.”

I felt my face flush, then did my best to push the color back down below my neck. I took a few breaths, but chose not to get angry. Or, more accurately, I chose not to show how angry I was. I didn’t ask the questions that formed in my mind” “So, I got what I deserved? is that what you’re saying? Acute leukemia in exchange for acting like an ass-hole?” I did some quick estimations, figuring that if arrogance and insensitivity were all it took to cause cancer, people would be getting diagnosed by the tens of millions every day.

Page 67
He used his time to read and educate himself in regard to filmmaking principles and theories. Of course, few things are more tedious, or perhaps more dangerous, than a person who’s come to view himself as an expert solely from theoretical readings.

Page 205
The time might not be far off when it’ll take an autopsy to calm me down.

Page 217
Before a catheter could be inserted into Elisa’s spinal column, through which her epidural pain relief would flow, the physicians need to get her “informed consent’ for the procedure. A young resident read her his required text faster than the the most distracted flight attendant has ever sped thrugh the safety feature of an aircraft.

“Doyouunderstandthateverymedicalprocedurecarriestheriskofcomplications?”

Page 218
The calm wisdom in that infant’s eyes is something I will never forget.

[Nicole · Rating 4 out of 5]

Let me preface this review by saying that the book's cover has got to be the best cover I've ever seen. Too funny... a coworker of mine gave me this book because she knew that I had an obsession with Harry Goldenblatt from Sex and the City. Unfortunately, Harry is nothing like Evan. haha. He is a GREAT writer, and I truly enjoyed reading his takes on life. He find comedy in everything - even when he was literally on his deathbed in the hospital practically dying from leukemia. I also thought the book got better as it went along. While the beginning parts were definitely thought-worthy, I liked seeing how he developed as a person because of his cancer, and of course the story of how he met his wife. Very cute book, and a very quick read. If anything, read the book for the cover. In this case, you CAN judge a book by its cover. : )

[Lindsay Russo · Rating 3 out of 5]

Kind of a mix of David Sedaris' memoirist-humor and a grumpy self-help book, I enjoyed this book. Handler has a quirky way of writing, and the development of both the women in his life as well as his self-actualization from story to story made for a murky through-line. "27 breakups with 10 women" isn't a bad way to end bachelorhood...

The only thing that annoyed me was a disclaimer of his writing style at the start. If you write a certain way, or make a choice to write a certain way, own it. It made the beginning awkward for me, as he talked about being such a successful young actor until his illness, and then about his later fame. Good actors make bold choices. Shouldn't good writers as well?

[Kim Olson · Rating 3 out of 5]

I've many times recommended Evan Handler's first book, Time on Fire, about his fight against leukemia (in his early 20s) and his tireless efforts to circumvent the frightening incompetence of the doctors and hospitals that were supposed to be trying to keep him alive. Written with uncommon grace and humor, his story stayed with me and I often wondered how he was doing.

Then a few years ago, his face popped up on Sex and the City. His newfound visability will likely make this book--which covers more recent years--an even greater commercial success. His comic navel-gazing covers topics ranging from his commitment-phobia to career successes and missteps. I still appreciate Handler's wit, but this book doesn't quite stand on its own like his first.

[Laren · Rating 2 out of 5]

Here's a book from an actor (best known as Charlotte's husband Harry from "Sex and the City") who survives a deadly form of cancer only to discover he doesn't have any great insights or answers to life as a result of this struggle. In fact, the story really isn't that compelling as a result. He doesn't chronicle much of the cancer battle or even his work as a struggling actor, choosing instead in this book to focus on his string of relationships leading up to his wife. I guess US magazine is right: Stars - they're just like us!

[Kristen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I didn't want this book to end. In fact, when I read the last paragraph and looked to see the word "Acknowledgements" at the top of the next page, I was disappointed - but not in the sense that the book was incomplete. What I loved most was Handler's wit and VERY honest acknowledgment of some less-than-desirable choices and actions. He also made an excellent decision to write his memoir as a series of non-chronological stories. Loved it!

[Iris AE · Rating 3 out of 5]

A very honest and true account of how a life can go... Evan Handler underwent chemotherapy, survived cancer, then became actor and screenwriter and finally landed a success as 'Harry' in Sex and the City. Yet, he remained and incredibly accurate observer of human detail, and honest throughout, with himself in particular. This book describes a journey through stages of self-inquisition, finally ending more than beautifully - but I won't give that away, read it yourselves!

[Amanda · Rating 3 out of 5]

really great start - only to devolve into stories about how "amazing" his wife and inlaws are...
that's great evan - for you. but i found it really boring. very disappointing, considering how much i enjoyed the first 2/3 of the book.

so go ahead - read it - but you might want to stop when he meets his wife. or maybe not - maybe you and i are just different.

[Izetta Autumn]

I'm looking forward to reading this memoir. Recently, I saw Evan Handler on the Tavis Smiley show, speaking about his book. I found myself really engaged in the discussion he was having - the focus on gratitude and Handler's realness about illness. I liked that he resisted being the "hero" having survived illness, while also centering on his gratefulness for surviving.

[Jennifer]

I can't seem to finish this one. I don't really understand why, it's not like it's a bad book, i like the guy and he is funny. this is the book that Rich was reading when he was diagnosed, he never finished it.... so i picked it up thinking i would read it. i am probably half way through it too, but i have had the book since June of 2008.

[Stacy · Rating 2 out of 5]

I would probably have given this a 2.5 if that was an option. It was entertaining enough-- but I found it a little simpering at times. I did appreciate his honesty about his choices in life, good and bad and it definitely got better towards the end. But during some of it, I was wondering, "Where are you going with this?" and I didn't always get that answered.

[Evan · Rating 4 out of 5]

I actually liked this one a little better than his first. Basically its a biography of little stories from his life after his bout with cancer, bone marrow transplant. While I thought the first one tended to be a little whiny at times, this one seems more honed into his angry comedy and sarcasm.

3.5 / 5.0

[Melissa · Rating 4 out of 5]

Insights from a man who was supposed to be dead 20 years earlier. While the author is a well-known actor, there's very little of the Hollywood biography here. More reflections from someone who recognizes his flaws and shares them in an honest, amusing manner.

[Lara · Rating 5 out of 5]

I could write review after review and never even scratch the surface of how wonderful this book is. Though I did try here: http://chickennuggetsofwisdom.com/201...

[Lisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was lucky enough to get an advance copy of this book. It's fantastic so far! It comes out May 1, 2008.

[Karen · Rating 3 out of 5]

Can't wait to sink my teeth into this one; he's the actor who plays Charlotte's husband on Sex and the City. Love him!

[Mary Kathryn · Rating 4 out of 5]

The stakes aren't as high as in "Time on Fire," but his writing is still compulsively readable.

[Jaye · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is one of those books that I really wanted to like a lot more than I did. Needless to say, it was pretty disappointing.

[Tamara · Rating 4 out of 5]

My favorite story is how Evan and his wife met. I was able to get my copy autographed and meet the author at the Jewish Book Fair!

[Karen · Rating 4 out of 5]

just finished reading this. it's a good read, well written. i don't like to discuss books in reviews, i just like to say if i liked it or not.

[Megan · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have a bald man crush on Evan Handler. He is hilarious, charismatic, and just so darn likable. His wife is a lucky woman.

[Stephanie · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked the writing better than in his first book, but I didn't love. I really liked reading about his wife's opinion of American hygiene.

[Madeleine · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read his earlier book "Time on Fire" and this was a great follow up. Evan writes well. The essay about the bidet had me laughing out loud.