I was excited about this one, but it was actually pretty disappointing. It's not a bad story, just...very mediocre and shallow.
Despite the back cover's summary, Harue is 41 years old when he meets his first-ever boyfriend. We start, a little confusingly, when he is 42...with all the tension completely stripped out of the story because he's a year into dating and living with Fujishima. They had a recent argument about Harue's pessimism and "dark thoughts," but are still being very new-in-love and cutesy. Harue curls around Fujishima in bed, desperately spinning a little wish-spell to ensure they stay together forever.
It's very sweet...but a little bit of a weird way to start, because it ends up making their future seem not quite as settled and guaranteed as the "forever" Harue wants so badly.
We then skip back to their first meeting, when overworked salaryman Harue is out drinking after another long day at work, and runs into a guy he'd matched with on a dating app he'd only installed on his phone for work purposes and had forgotten to delete. The backstory for that was funny, with Harue literally dropping his phone on his face and accidentally "liking" a hot, out of his league guy's profile.
Fujishima had matched back, or their phones wouldn't have chimed with recognition when they were in the same bar, but he clearly hadn't been that interested, because he'd never bothered messaging Harue.
Once they start talking, though, he gets increasingly intrigued: Harue is cute, interesting, and very refreshing. He seems to really get Fujishima and laughs along with him, contributing such good conversation that they stay out drinking and talking until the last train is gone. So they go to a love hotel - something Fujishima is used to and has indeed used this app for - but which Harue is not remotely ready for.
At no point in the story does Harue actually tell Fujishima that he's completely inexperienced; it's implied near the end, when he's "practicing kissing," but we don't get to see him telling Fujishima he's literally never dated anyone. He just says things like "it's been a while." Fujishima is his first love and his first boyfriend, and it makes him extra anxious and worried about getting a lot of things wrong, or making Fujishima lose interest in him.
Fujishima tells Harue that's what he loves about him...because after one night of talking and some online chats, he's decided he's in love. And Harue says he is, too.
That was...honestly way too fast. I appreciated that the physical parts were a slower progression, with Fujishima respecting Harue's pace and understanding he didn't want to rush things he wasn't ready for or experienced in. But you don't fall in love overnight, and it cheapened their story a little bit.
It also added to everything feeling a little more shallow. Fujishima loved all those fresh, exciting expressions Harue had, which were largely due to his inexperience. But a year later, they have an argument about Harue...still being insecure and pessimistic and hard on himself, which is what Fujishima had claimed to love about him? So the shine wore off, that quickly, as things do with new relationships.
That's what made the pacing and structure feel off to me. I did like the little bits of Fujishima's side, where it showed more of what he liked about Harue and how lonely he'd been, even with a lot more relationship experience. But I never felt the real depth of their connection.
Plus we literally got two separate guys barging in to try to steal Fujishima away, which was an awful lot for a story this short.
And a lot of the art was pretty indistinguishable...there's this particular, very distinctive jacket/blazer pattern that was used (with only minor variations) for Fujishima, one of his former app hook-up buddies, and one of his gay male coworkers. Then this other guy, an ex wedding client of Fujishima's who'd gotten divorced so he could be with him instead, suddenly shows up out of nowhere to tell Harue he's drab and doesn't deserve him. I had to flip back to figure out if he was the same former hook-up guy (he wasn't).
Fujishima goes from "oh hey it's been so long, nice to see you," to an instant "I WILL CALL THE POLICE FOR HARASSMENT," which was also really weird pacing and hardly even seemed in character. Then Harue has this kind of immature outburst about "he's my boyfriend, how dare you say I'm not good enough!"
On top of that, there's this whole side thread about Fujishima's grandmother dying, and then his cat dying, and him being a lot more sad about the cat. There are close up panels showing him touching his cat necklace and being sad, and the ex-hook-up guy tells Fujishima he's sad and lonely because of his dead cat and should hook up with him again so he doesn't feel so alone...
But Fujishima never talks to Harue about his cat. Then they suddenly have a cat when they move in together. Happy ending, woo?
It feels like so many scattered ideas that just didn't work for a coherent story. Should probably be a lower rating, but I wanted to like this so badly that I'll just let it stay at 3 stars. It'd be nice to have more actually good stories about middle-aged men in love, or finding love later in life. I appreciate that there was an attempt, at least.
Nice idea, fairly poor execution.