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The Ocean Would Paint Me Blue
Not yet published
Expected 2 Jun 26From the celebrated author of As Long as the Lemon Tree Grows comes a poignant novel about a Syrian American girl who uses a magical sketchbook to turn her grief into art, painting miraculous murals of her mother’s life in Syria.
Seventeen-year-old Jihad Dabbagh has always seen life with a heightened sense for colors, one of many magical blessings the women in her family possess. But Jihad's gift changes depending on her mood. When depression sets in, the world is a colorless oasis, and in the wake of her mother's sudden death, the world has become a permanent shade of grey.
Broken by tragedy, Jihad's family doesn't believe her color loss. Her father sends her to the elite Braxton Academy to finish her senior year. There, Jihad's name and hijab put a target on her back. Her haven comes in the form of an old sketchbook carved from a tree in her hometown in Syria — a country she only knew through her mother's stories. Jihad hasn't picked up a brush in over a year, but finds herself channeling the colors of her hurt, pain, and grief as she paints the story of her mother's journey in Syria.
When graffiti of that same mural starts magically popping up all over New York, her art goes viral and the world takes notice, the threat of legal consequences is imminent. To reclaim her voice, Jihad will have to paint a new future for herself and Braxton, guided by the resilience of her mother's story.
Seventeen-year-old Jihad Dabbagh has always seen life with a heightened sense for colors, one of many magical blessings the women in her family possess. But Jihad's gift changes depending on her mood. When depression sets in, the world is a colorless oasis, and in the wake of her mother's sudden death, the world has become a permanent shade of grey.
Broken by tragedy, Jihad's family doesn't believe her color loss. Her father sends her to the elite Braxton Academy to finish her senior year. There, Jihad's name and hijab put a target on her back. Her haven comes in the form of an old sketchbook carved from a tree in her hometown in Syria — a country she only knew through her mother's stories. Jihad hasn't picked up a brush in over a year, but finds herself channeling the colors of her hurt, pain, and grief as she paints the story of her mother's journey in Syria.
When graffiti of that same mural starts magically popping up all over New York, her art goes viral and the world takes notice, the threat of legal consequences is imminent. To reclaim her voice, Jihad will have to paint a new future for herself and Braxton, guided by the resilience of her mother's story.
367 pages, Kindle Edition
Expected publication June 2, 2026
About the author
Zoulfa Katouh
2 books6,273 followersAll Zoulfa wanted was to lay in her bed and eat sliced mango all day long with no single thought in her mind, but now she has two jobs, scientist and author. She has girlbossed so close to the sun, that she's burning. She lost the original plot.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 149 reviews
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
— 4/5 stars
Okay, so in my pre-read review, I said that getting the ARC of this book felt like a dream come true and I still stand by that. But what I didn’t expect was that this “dream” would turn into something so real, so raw, that it would actually shake me awake. Because that’s exactly what this book did. It felt like a reality check. A slap to the face. The kind that forces you to open your eyes whether you’re ready or not.
This book pulled me out of that comfortable little bubble we all sometimes live in. You know, the one where we scroll past pain, ignore injustice, and convince ourselves that since it’s not happening to us, it’s somehow distant… less real. But it’s not. And this book makes sure you feel that.
It made me realize how often we choose silence. How often we look away from suffering, inequality, and injustice simply because it doesn’t directly affect us. And that realization? It’s uncomfortable. It’s heavy. But it’s also necessary.
I truly appreciate Zoulfa Katouh for writing something so powerful, for using her voice to speak about issues that are often ignored especially for women, and more specifically Muslim women who are judged, misunderstood, and reduced to stereotypes because of their identity or appearance. Reading this felt like witnessing truths that people don’t talk about enough, and it honestly shook me to my core.
It’s heartbreaking to know that people go through so much pain just because of what they believe in, or how they choose to live their lives. And what’s even more unsettling is how normalized that indifference has become.
Because at the end of the day, injustice is injustice. It doesn’t matter who it happens to. Turning a blind eye doesn’t make you neutral it makes you part of the problem. And I firmly believe that staying silent in the face of wrong is just as damaging as committing it.
This book didn’t just tell a story. It made me think, reflect, and most importantly feel. And I think that’s something we all need a little more of.
➳ ABOUT THE BOOK
So this book revolves around a girl named Jihad.
And yes, even her name carries weight different meanings, different interpretations, depending on who’s saying it and how they choose to see it. But at its core, it means a fighter. And that’s exactly who she is. A fighter in every sense of the word.
She has spent her entire life trying to carve out a space for herself in a world that doesn’t always make room for people like her. A Muslim girl, living in a non-Muslim country trying to exist, to belong, to be seen beyond the labels people so easily place on her. She grew up believing in a certain version of the world, one her mother taught her about. But as she grows older, she realizes that reality is far more brutal. This world doesn’t always protect you. Sometimes, it just watches.
And that, to me, was one of the most heartbreaking parts. The way people turn a blind eye. The way someone can be harassed in the middle of the street, and others just… look away. That silence, that indifference, it says so much. Because sometimes, the people who do nothing are just as responsible as the ones causing harm.
But as if that wasn’t enough, Jihad goes through something even more devastating, she loses her mother. And that loss changes everything. She feels lost, directionless, like a part of her has been taken away forever. You can feel her grief, her confusion, her quiet struggle to keep going.Her father and sister try to support her, to help her move forward, and that’s how she ends up at Barrington University.
But things don’t get easier.
She starts realizing that people aren’t always who they claim to be. Even her childhood best friend, Alexis —someone she thought would always stand by her—turns into one of those people who dismiss her feelings, who say things like “you’re being too sensitive” or “it’s not that serious.” And honestly, that kind of betrayal hurts in a different way. Because it comes from someone you trusted.
As a hijabi, Jihad faces judgment, whispers, assumptions, things that slowly grow louder and more suffocating. At first, it’s subtle. But as time passes, it gets worse. The stares, the rumors, the quiet cruelty, it all builds up.
And then there’s Jamie.
Jamie was such a refreshing presence in the story. He didn’t come in like some grand savior, but more like someone who genuinely cared. Someone who saw her for who she truly was. Their bond starts off soft and simple, but of course, being in a high school setting, it quickly becomes the center of rumors and unnecessary drama.But what I loved the most about Jamie is that he helped her reconnect with herself. Not just her passion for art, but her identity, her strength, her sense of worth. He reminded her of who she was beneath all the noise, all the judgment.
And honestly, I truly, truly loved his character for that.
➳ ABOUT THE CHARACTERS
Okay, so I’m going to be really honest here, this book was not what I expected at all. I went in thinking it would be something soft, something comforting… but instead, it hit me like a brutal slap to the face. And I don’t even mean that in a bad way, it was just intense, raw, and very, very real.
At the beginning, I struggled a bit. The writing felt a little boring to me, and I just couldn’t fully get into it. It took me some time to actually connect with the story. But once it picked up oh my God, I devoured it. I’m not even exaggerating, I think I read the major chunk in like two hours because I just couldn’t stop. It was less about the plot at that point and more about the reality it was showing. The fact that people actually go through all of this it genuinely shook me.
And Jihad, what a character. Truly. Initially, I’ll admit, I didn’t like her much. I thought she was overly emotional, maybe even a little too sensitive. But as the story unfolded, I realized she wasn’t any of that, she was just a girl trying to find her place in a world that constantly made her feel like she didn’t belong. And that changes everything.
She wasn’t weak. She was fighting. Fighting every single day to exist, to be seen, to be heard. And honestly, that takes so much strength. She was never meant to fit in, she was meant to stand out, to shine. But the sad truth is, no matter how brightly you shine, there will always be people trying to dim your light. And that’s exactly what this book showed so painfully well.
I absolutely ended up loving her character. The way she stood up for herself, the way she kept going despite everything, it was inspiring in a way that feels heavy but necessary. It really felt like an eye-opener, watching someone fight so hard just to have a space in this world.
Now let’s talk about Alexis, because what the actual hell was that? I genuinely hated her. Like, with my whole heart. I kept expecting her to be there for Jihad, to stand by her side, to prove that at least one person wouldn’t turn their back on her. But no. She turned out to be one of the worst kinds of people, the kind who dismiss your pain, who make you question your own reality. That betrayal hurt more than anything.
And then there’s Jamie. Honestly, Jamie felt like a breath of fresh air in the middle of all that chaos. He was kind, patient, and actually listened. He didn’t try to fix her or silence her, he just made her feel seen and understood. And I think that’s what made him so special. He gave her something she had been craving all along, a sense of belonging.
I also loved how their bond wasn’t defined by religion or cultural differences. They came from completely different worlds, yet what connected them was something so simple and so important, humanity.
Because at the end of the day, before anything else, we are human. And that’s something people tend to forget.
➳ FINAL THOUGHTS
This book is honestly something I feel anyone and everyone should read. It’s not just a story, it’s an experience, a reflection of realities that people often choose to ignore. I truly loved how the author portrayed the indifference, the injustice, and the quiet suffering that so many women go through, especially Muslim women, who are constantly judged just because of how they choose to dress or simply because of who they are.
What stood out to me the most was how unapologetically real this book was. It didn’t try to sugarcoat anything. It didn’t hold back. While so many people hesitate to speak about these issues or avoid showing the harsh truth, quite literally Zoulfa Katouh held up a mirror in front of us, and that takes courage. And I deeply, deeply respect that.
It also wasn’t just limited to one group, it reflected the broader reality of how women, in general, face indifference and injustice in ways that are often dismissed or normalized. Reading it felt heavy at times, but also necessary. Like something you need to sit with.
The only small issue I had was that it took me a while to fully get into the book. Maybe it was my reading slump, maybe life was just getting in the way, but it did take some time for me to truly connect with it. However, once I reached the peak, there was no stopping me. I absolutely devoured it.
Overall, I really did love this book. It was powerful, emotional, and incredibly eye-opening. The only reason I’m not giving it a full five stars is because it took me a while to get into it. The slow start kind of affected my overall experience, and I feel like it disrupted the flow for me a little.
⚘ "Overall, if you’re in the mood for a book that will crush your soul, but also comfort you at the same time, this might just be the perfect book for you! 💌
— Thank you to NetGalley, the publisher and the author for providing me with an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈
౨ৎ pre-read:
⤿ started - 20 February, 2026
getting the ARC for this book felt like a dream come true 😭🤞🏻
Okay, so in my pre-read review, I said that getting the ARC of this book felt like a dream come true and I still stand by that. But what I didn’t expect was that this “dream” would turn into something so real, so raw, that it would actually shake me awake. Because that’s exactly what this book did. It felt like a reality check. A slap to the face. The kind that forces you to open your eyes whether you’re ready or not.
This book pulled me out of that comfortable little bubble we all sometimes live in. You know, the one where we scroll past pain, ignore injustice, and convince ourselves that since it’s not happening to us, it’s somehow distant… less real. But it’s not. And this book makes sure you feel that.
It made me realize how often we choose silence. How often we look away from suffering, inequality, and injustice simply because it doesn’t directly affect us. And that realization? It’s uncomfortable. It’s heavy. But it’s also necessary.
I truly appreciate Zoulfa Katouh for writing something so powerful, for using her voice to speak about issues that are often ignored especially for women, and more specifically Muslim women who are judged, misunderstood, and reduced to stereotypes because of their identity or appearance. Reading this felt like witnessing truths that people don’t talk about enough, and it honestly shook me to my core.
It’s heartbreaking to know that people go through so much pain just because of what they believe in, or how they choose to live their lives. And what’s even more unsettling is how normalized that indifference has become.
Because at the end of the day, injustice is injustice. It doesn’t matter who it happens to. Turning a blind eye doesn’t make you neutral it makes you part of the problem. And I firmly believe that staying silent in the face of wrong is just as damaging as committing it.
This book didn’t just tell a story. It made me think, reflect, and most importantly feel. And I think that’s something we all need a little more of.
➳ ABOUT THE BOOK
So this book revolves around a girl named Jihad.
And yes, even her name carries weight different meanings, different interpretations, depending on who’s saying it and how they choose to see it. But at its core, it means a fighter. And that’s exactly who she is. A fighter in every sense of the word.
She has spent her entire life trying to carve out a space for herself in a world that doesn’t always make room for people like her. A Muslim girl, living in a non-Muslim country trying to exist, to belong, to be seen beyond the labels people so easily place on her. She grew up believing in a certain version of the world, one her mother taught her about. But as she grows older, she realizes that reality is far more brutal. This world doesn’t always protect you. Sometimes, it just watches.
And that, to me, was one of the most heartbreaking parts. The way people turn a blind eye. The way someone can be harassed in the middle of the street, and others just… look away. That silence, that indifference, it says so much. Because sometimes, the people who do nothing are just as responsible as the ones causing harm.
But as if that wasn’t enough, Jihad goes through something even more devastating, she loses her mother. And that loss changes everything. She feels lost, directionless, like a part of her has been taken away forever. You can feel her grief, her confusion, her quiet struggle to keep going.Her father and sister try to support her, to help her move forward, and that’s how she ends up at Barrington University.
But things don’t get easier.
She starts realizing that people aren’t always who they claim to be. Even her childhood best friend, Alexis —someone she thought would always stand by her—turns into one of those people who dismiss her feelings, who say things like “you’re being too sensitive” or “it’s not that serious.” And honestly, that kind of betrayal hurts in a different way. Because it comes from someone you trusted.
As a hijabi, Jihad faces judgment, whispers, assumptions, things that slowly grow louder and more suffocating. At first, it’s subtle. But as time passes, it gets worse. The stares, the rumors, the quiet cruelty, it all builds up.
And then there’s Jamie.
Jamie was such a refreshing presence in the story. He didn’t come in like some grand savior, but more like someone who genuinely cared. Someone who saw her for who she truly was. Their bond starts off soft and simple, but of course, being in a high school setting, it quickly becomes the center of rumors and unnecessary drama.But what I loved the most about Jamie is that he helped her reconnect with herself. Not just her passion for art, but her identity, her strength, her sense of worth. He reminded her of who she was beneath all the noise, all the judgment.
And honestly, I truly, truly loved his character for that.
➳ ABOUT THE CHARACTERS
Okay, so I’m going to be really honest here, this book was not what I expected at all. I went in thinking it would be something soft, something comforting… but instead, it hit me like a brutal slap to the face. And I don’t even mean that in a bad way, it was just intense, raw, and very, very real.
At the beginning, I struggled a bit. The writing felt a little boring to me, and I just couldn’t fully get into it. It took me some time to actually connect with the story. But once it picked up oh my God, I devoured it. I’m not even exaggerating, I think I read the major chunk in like two hours because I just couldn’t stop. It was less about the plot at that point and more about the reality it was showing. The fact that people actually go through all of this it genuinely shook me.
And Jihad, what a character. Truly. Initially, I’ll admit, I didn’t like her much. I thought she was overly emotional, maybe even a little too sensitive. But as the story unfolded, I realized she wasn’t any of that, she was just a girl trying to find her place in a world that constantly made her feel like she didn’t belong. And that changes everything.
She wasn’t weak. She was fighting. Fighting every single day to exist, to be seen, to be heard. And honestly, that takes so much strength. She was never meant to fit in, she was meant to stand out, to shine. But the sad truth is, no matter how brightly you shine, there will always be people trying to dim your light. And that’s exactly what this book showed so painfully well.
I absolutely ended up loving her character. The way she stood up for herself, the way she kept going despite everything, it was inspiring in a way that feels heavy but necessary. It really felt like an eye-opener, watching someone fight so hard just to have a space in this world.
Now let’s talk about Alexis, because what the actual hell was that? I genuinely hated her. Like, with my whole heart. I kept expecting her to be there for Jihad, to stand by her side, to prove that at least one person wouldn’t turn their back on her. But no. She turned out to be one of the worst kinds of people, the kind who dismiss your pain, who make you question your own reality. That betrayal hurt more than anything.
And then there’s Jamie. Honestly, Jamie felt like a breath of fresh air in the middle of all that chaos. He was kind, patient, and actually listened. He didn’t try to fix her or silence her, he just made her feel seen and understood. And I think that’s what made him so special. He gave her something she had been craving all along, a sense of belonging.
I also loved how their bond wasn’t defined by religion or cultural differences. They came from completely different worlds, yet what connected them was something so simple and so important, humanity.
Because at the end of the day, before anything else, we are human. And that’s something people tend to forget.
➳ FINAL THOUGHTS
This book is honestly something I feel anyone and everyone should read. It’s not just a story, it’s an experience, a reflection of realities that people often choose to ignore. I truly loved how the author portrayed the indifference, the injustice, and the quiet suffering that so many women go through, especially Muslim women, who are constantly judged just because of how they choose to dress or simply because of who they are.
What stood out to me the most was how unapologetically real this book was. It didn’t try to sugarcoat anything. It didn’t hold back. While so many people hesitate to speak about these issues or avoid showing the harsh truth, quite literally Zoulfa Katouh held up a mirror in front of us, and that takes courage. And I deeply, deeply respect that.
It also wasn’t just limited to one group, it reflected the broader reality of how women, in general, face indifference and injustice in ways that are often dismissed or normalized. Reading it felt heavy at times, but also necessary. Like something you need to sit with.
The only small issue I had was that it took me a while to fully get into the book. Maybe it was my reading slump, maybe life was just getting in the way, but it did take some time for me to truly connect with it. However, once I reached the peak, there was no stopping me. I absolutely devoured it.
Overall, I really did love this book. It was powerful, emotional, and incredibly eye-opening. The only reason I’m not giving it a full five stars is because it took me a while to get into it. The slow start kind of affected my overall experience, and I feel like it disrupted the flow for me a little.
⚘ "Overall, if you’re in the mood for a book that will crush your soul, but also comfort you at the same time, this might just be the perfect book for you! 💌
— Thank you to NetGalley, the publisher and the author for providing me with an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈
౨ৎ pre-read:
⤿ started - 20 February, 2026
getting the ARC for this book felt like a dream come true 😭🤞🏻
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
This book had me raging, it had me sobbing, and it made me feel so helpless 😭 I loved how zoulfa write. rtc
___
As long as the lemon trees grow was a masterpiece that I have read 3 times 😭 and my last reread was during Ramadan, so I want to read her new book during this month as well 🤭 like you guys don't understand the mess that book made me, I never cry while reading books but that one made me SOB 😔😔 expecting the same from this <33
___
As long as the lemon trees grow was a masterpiece that I have read 3 times 😭 and my last reread was during Ramadan, so I want to read her new book during this month as well 🤭 like you guys don't understand the mess that book made me, I never cry while reading books but that one made me SOB 😔😔 expecting the same from this <33
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
3.25 stars!
This was such a beautiful and evocative read. The writing was stunningly poetic and lyrical that it felt as if I were living in the story itself. It was as if I forgot how to breathe. The fmc and her sister's childhood stories were incredibly moving. I will admit, they brought me to tears many a times while reading this novel. However, while the emotional core was stunning, I did run into a few hurdles with the story that kept it from being a perfect 5-star experience.
This book offers a burning and sizzling look at the mech. of Islamophobia and the weight of being Arab in a space that does not want you to take up room. While I understand that the fmc’s silence is a realistic reflection of the trauma and exhaustion that come with constant discrimination she had to face, it was deeply painful to witness. I found myself frequently wishing she would claim her power and it was incredibly frustrating to watch her remain quiet while her name, her faith and her very character were disparaged by those around her.
The characterisation was incredibly thin.
Aside from Jamie, the only character who truly was amazing was Amal, Jihad's sister. As an eldest daughter myself, I felt a deep, instant connection to her role. But I seriously could not distinguish among her friends. They all sounded the same- no difference. It was unbelievable at times seeing that the only person in the school with a sane mind to be Jamie (the mmc) and literally no other pupil, not even the teachers. The only person apart from Jamie I liked was Amal- the reason (probably) is that, that I'm the eldest daughter in my family too and I could relate to her.
Now, focusing on Jihad- as much as I wanted to love this, she made it a challenge. She felt less like a person and more like a collection of tragic circumstances. Even taking her trauma into account, it is frustrating because the book had so much going for it, but a protagonist without a clear personality makes for a very long read.
At the same time, I do recognize that her silence and hesitation likely reflect the reality of the systemic discrimination of her religion and culture. But then again, her behaviour with her father and her sister in her book made me forget about what she was going through and made me want to scream at her and put some sense in her. And the way she was not standing by herself from the very moment she entered her new school made it incredibly painful to watch everything unfold. Yes, I do understand that- not everyone responds with such confidence. Her reactions did sound real but it was painful to view it all.
The ending, however was beautiful but bittersweet. The author chose realism over revenge, which was the right move artistically, even if it’s emotionally unsatisfying. After everything she went through, I just wanted to see a glimpse of her and Jamie’s future together. I would have given anything for an extended ending.
₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊
.☘︎ ݁˖ 𝐏𝐫𝐞-𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝:
Although I haven't read As Long as the Lemon Trees Grow yet, the glowing reviews have me intrigued!! Anyways, buddy reading with mygranddaughter, ishyyy
Thank you to NetGalley and Little, Brown Books for Young Readers for the arc in exchange for an honest review.
Publication Date: 2 June 2026
This was such a beautiful and evocative read. The writing was stunningly poetic and lyrical that it felt as if I were living in the story itself. It was as if I forgot how to breathe. The fmc and her sister's childhood stories were incredibly moving. I will admit, they brought me to tears many a times while reading this novel. However, while the emotional core was stunning, I did run into a few hurdles with the story that kept it from being a perfect 5-star experience.
This book offers a burning and sizzling look at the mech. of Islamophobia and the weight of being Arab in a space that does not want you to take up room. While I understand that the fmc’s silence is a realistic reflection of the trauma and exhaustion that come with constant discrimination she had to face, it was deeply painful to witness. I found myself frequently wishing she would claim her power and it was incredibly frustrating to watch her remain quiet while her name, her faith and her very character were disparaged by those around her.
The characterisation was incredibly thin.
Aside from Jamie, the only character who truly was amazing was Amal, Jihad's sister. As an eldest daughter myself, I felt a deep, instant connection to her role. But I seriously could not distinguish among her friends. They all sounded the same- no difference. It was unbelievable at times seeing that the only person in the school with a sane mind to be Jamie (the mmc) and literally no other pupil, not even the teachers. The only person apart from Jamie I liked was Amal- the reason (probably) is that, that I'm the eldest daughter in my family too and I could relate to her.
Now, focusing on Jihad- as much as I wanted to love this, she made it a challenge. She felt less like a person and more like a collection of tragic circumstances. Even taking her trauma into account, it is frustrating because the book had so much going for it, but a protagonist without a clear personality makes for a very long read.
At the same time, I do recognize that her silence and hesitation likely reflect the reality of the systemic discrimination of her religion and culture. But then again, her behaviour with her father and her sister in her book made me forget about what she was going through and made me want to scream at her and put some sense in her. And the way she was not standing by herself from the very moment she entered her new school made it incredibly painful to watch everything unfold. Yes, I do understand that- not everyone responds with such confidence. Her reactions did sound real but it was painful to view it all.
The ending, however was beautiful but bittersweet. The author chose realism over revenge, which was the right move artistically, even if it’s emotionally unsatisfying. After everything she went through, I just wanted to see a glimpse of her and Jamie’s future together. I would have given anything for an extended ending.
₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊
.☘︎ ݁˖ 𝐏𝐫𝐞-𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝:
Although I haven't read As Long as the Lemon Trees Grow yet, the glowing reviews have me intrigued!! Anyways, buddy reading with my
Thank you to NetGalley and Little, Brown Books for Young Readers for the arc in exchange for an honest review.
Publication Date: 2 June 2026
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
──⟡⋆˙✩ 5 stars ✩ ⋆˙⟡──
The best thing about this book is how unapologetically Muslim it is. My religion is not diluted, condensed so others can feel comfortable. It is not reshaped into something easier to swallow, softer, quieter, more “acceptable.” It does not bend itself into something aesthetic for the masses. It does not apologize for existing.
Instead, Islam stands here in its purest, truest, most luminous form.
My religion is beautiful. This book reminded me of that all over again. I want to cry.
𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔 βօօҟͲąցʂ 𓍯𓂃
➽ Coming of Age
➽ Magical realism
➽ Hijabi FMC
➽ Black cat FMC x golden retriever MMC
ᥴꪮꪀꪻꫀꪀꪻ ᭙ꪖ᥅ꪀ꠸ꪀᧁᦓ:
Grief over death of a family member. Severe bullying and harassment. Racism. Islamophobia. Bleak realism over justice enacted.
𝕎𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕋𝕙𝕚𝕤 𝔹𝕠𝕠𝕜 𝕀𝕤 𝔸𝕓𝕠𝕦𝕥: ℕ𝕒𝕟𝕔𝕪 𝔼𝕕𝕚𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟 ᯓ★
After the death of Jihad's mother, her world is leached of color, literally. Everything fades into grey, like grief has rewritten reality itself. She’s sent to a school filled with rich white kids, where she is forced to endure racism, Islamophobia, and the exhausting weight of being other.
Jihad fights. For her right to exist. For her right to wear her hijab. For her right to be.
And somewhere in that storm, she meets Jamie. A boy with a heart as vast as the ocean he’s named after. A boy who brings warmth back into a world that forgot how to hold it.
𝕄𝕪 𝕋𝕙𝕠𝕦𝕘𝕙𝕥𝕤 𝕒𝕟𝕕 𝔽𝕖𝕖𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤 ᯓ★
This book is really such a love letter to Muslims. It's heavy, yes. It depicts the Islamophobia Muslims have to face while living in a non-muslim country. It shows the suffering we have to endure, with no hope for justice.
But it also does such a good job at showing the beauty of Islam. How it's not just a religion but a way of life. How it is a source of peace for us. It's been so long since I read a book that really shows us the true image of Islam. I felt loved. I felt so much closer to my deen. I am a Muslim and have been from birth. And reading this book made me really feel the beauty of it coursing through my veins. I want to inject this book into my arteries so it goes straight to my heart, making itself a home inside my ventricles.
This book inspired me so much. It made me realize how lucky I am. How privileged, to be born in a Muslim country, to be living in a Muslim country, with a bunch of Muslim friends, to not have to fight to simply exist, to not have to justify my existence to any stranger who dresses differently than me and has different beliefs than my own.
And can we talk about “Muslim representation” in other books for a second? Because please. Half the time it feels like authors want diversity points without doing the work. Muslim characters who are conveniently not religious, as if faith itself is the problem. As if Islam only becomes “acceptable” when it’s barely there.
Can you see me rolling my eyes? Because I am.
𝕵𝖎𝖍𝖆𝖉 𝕯𝖆𝖇𝖇𝖆𝖌𝖍 𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔
Jihad lives up to her name in the most powerful way. Because she fights. True to her name. She fights for her right to exist. To practice her religion. To wear her hijab. She refuses to let the bigots, islamophobes, the racists win. And refuses to be the victim. To be another tragedy.
She is a fighter. She is a warrior. She fights for the sake of Allah in her own way. This journey is her own personal Jihad.
My strong resilient precious girl.
She doesn't know. But I adore her.Damn who's cutting onions in my room
𝕵𝖆𝖒𝖎𝖊 𝕸𝖚𝖗𝖕𝖍𝖞 𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔
Okay can we finally talk about what an adorable ball of literal sunshine and fluff Jamie is? He's so so cute AHH I get cuteness aggression when he's on page I wanna eat him (I mean that in a halal way) I want really to squish his cheeks I swear.
The way he would stare too long at Jihad and get all shy and bashful, and start blushing while Jihad looks at him with confusion the whole time. hkskairieisnfusjdif.
I'M OKAY I SWEAR.
On my way to pray tahajjud so I can ask Allah for a Jamie. PLEASE MY LORD. Provide me Jamie.
Zoulfa Katouh weaves such kindness into her main characters. It builds up an ache in me. I don't know what to do with a boy so kind. It makes me want to cry.
𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕎𝕣𝕚𝕥𝕚𝕟𝕘 ᯓ★
The writing deserves to be framed and studied like art. I am STUNNED. Should I have been? It was the same in As Long As The Lemon Trees Grow. Zoulfa's writing has me on a chokehold.
How can someone write such a heavy book but infuse so much magic, so much whimsy into it? The ocean imagery, the jellyfish, the sea turtles, the colors slowly bleeding back into the world… it all feels like watching life return, piece by piece. Reading it made me feel magical. And that ending…
It felt like being handed a fairy tale after surviving a storm.
(ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ꕤ.ﾟ・Ꮖᥒ Ꮯꪮᥒᥴᥣᥙ᥉เꪮᥒ・
I reject any and all criticisms of this book.
Coming from a Muslim girl, this book written by a Muslim author, about a Muslim girl in a non-Muslim country who refuses to conform, is a masterpiece. If perfection could take a physical form and sit quietly on your shelf…
It would look exactly like this. ✩
Thank you NetGalley and Little, Brown Books for Young Readers for sending this book for review consideration. All opinions are my own.
⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹
Pre-Read
⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹
I got the ARC. I know I'm surprised too. Gotta thank Fadheela for alerting me when she did.
I LOVED As Long as the Lemon Trees Grow. But I'm a bit nervous about this since I saw a lot of mixed reviews T_T
PLEASE DO NOT DISAPPOINT
The best thing about this book is how unapologetically Muslim it is. My religion is not diluted, condensed so others can feel comfortable. It is not reshaped into something easier to swallow, softer, quieter, more “acceptable.” It does not bend itself into something aesthetic for the masses. It does not apologize for existing.
Instead, Islam stands here in its purest, truest, most luminous form.
My religion is beautiful. This book reminded me of that all over again. I want to cry.
𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔 βօօҟͲąցʂ 𓍯𓂃
➽ Coming of Age
➽ Magical realism
➽ Hijabi FMC
➽ Black cat FMC x golden retriever MMC
ᥴꪮꪀꪻꫀꪀꪻ ᭙ꪖ᥅ꪀ꠸ꪀᧁᦓ:
Grief over death of a family member. Severe bullying and harassment. Racism. Islamophobia. Bleak realism over justice enacted.
𝕎𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕋𝕙𝕚𝕤 𝔹𝕠𝕠𝕜 𝕀𝕤 𝔸𝕓𝕠𝕦𝕥: ℕ𝕒𝕟𝕔𝕪 𝔼𝕕𝕚𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟 ᯓ★
After the death of Jihad's mother, her world is leached of color, literally. Everything fades into grey, like grief has rewritten reality itself. She’s sent to a school filled with rich white kids, where she is forced to endure racism, Islamophobia, and the exhausting weight of being other.
Jihad fights. For her right to exist. For her right to wear her hijab. For her right to be.
And somewhere in that storm, she meets Jamie. A boy with a heart as vast as the ocean he’s named after. A boy who brings warmth back into a world that forgot how to hold it.
𝕄𝕪 𝕋𝕙𝕠𝕦𝕘𝕙𝕥𝕤 𝕒𝕟𝕕 𝔽𝕖𝕖𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤 ᯓ★
This book is really such a love letter to Muslims. It's heavy, yes. It depicts the Islamophobia Muslims have to face while living in a non-muslim country. It shows the suffering we have to endure, with no hope for justice.
But it also does such a good job at showing the beauty of Islam. How it's not just a religion but a way of life. How it is a source of peace for us. It's been so long since I read a book that really shows us the true image of Islam. I felt loved. I felt so much closer to my deen. I am a Muslim and have been from birth. And reading this book made me really feel the beauty of it coursing through my veins. I want to inject this book into my arteries so it goes straight to my heart, making itself a home inside my ventricles.
This book inspired me so much. It made me realize how lucky I am. How privileged, to be born in a Muslim country, to be living in a Muslim country, with a bunch of Muslim friends, to not have to fight to simply exist, to not have to justify my existence to any stranger who dresses differently than me and has different beliefs than my own.
And can we talk about “Muslim representation” in other books for a second? Because please. Half the time it feels like authors want diversity points without doing the work. Muslim characters who are conveniently not religious, as if faith itself is the problem. As if Islam only becomes “acceptable” when it’s barely there.
Can you see me rolling my eyes? Because I am.
𝕵𝖎𝖍𝖆𝖉 𝕯𝖆𝖇𝖇𝖆𝖌𝖍 𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔
Jihad lives up to her name in the most powerful way. Because she fights. True to her name. She fights for her right to exist. To practice her religion. To wear her hijab. She refuses to let the bigots, islamophobes, the racists win. And refuses to be the victim. To be another tragedy.
She is a fighter. She is a warrior. She fights for the sake of Allah in her own way. This journey is her own personal Jihad.
My strong resilient precious girl.
She doesn't know. But I adore her.
𝕵𝖆𝖒𝖎𝖊 𝕸𝖚𝖗𝖕𝖍𝖞 𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔
Okay can we finally talk about what an adorable ball of literal sunshine and fluff Jamie is? He's so so cute AHH I get cuteness aggression when he's on page I wanna eat him (I mean that in a halal way) I want really to squish his cheeks I swear.
The way he would stare too long at Jihad and get all shy and bashful, and start blushing while Jihad looks at him with confusion the whole time. hkskairieisnfusjdif.
I'M OKAY I SWEAR.
Zoulfa Katouh weaves such kindness into her main characters. It builds up an ache in me. I don't know what to do with a boy so kind. It makes me want to cry.
𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕎𝕣𝕚𝕥𝕚𝕟𝕘 ᯓ★
The writing deserves to be framed and studied like art. I am STUNNED. Should I have been? It was the same in As Long As The Lemon Trees Grow. Zoulfa's writing has me on a chokehold.
How can someone write such a heavy book but infuse so much magic, so much whimsy into it? The ocean imagery, the jellyfish, the sea turtles, the colors slowly bleeding back into the world… it all feels like watching life return, piece by piece. Reading it made me feel magical. And that ending…
It felt like being handed a fairy tale after surviving a storm.
(ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ꕤ.ﾟ・Ꮖᥒ Ꮯꪮᥒᥴᥣᥙ᥉เꪮᥒ・
I reject any and all criticisms of this book.
Coming from a Muslim girl, this book written by a Muslim author, about a Muslim girl in a non-Muslim country who refuses to conform, is a masterpiece. If perfection could take a physical form and sit quietly on your shelf…
It would look exactly like this. ✩
Thank you NetGalley and Little, Brown Books for Young Readers for sending this book for review consideration. All opinions are my own.
⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹
Pre-Read
⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹
I got the ARC. I know I'm surprised too. Gotta thank Fadheela for alerting me when she did.
I LOVED As Long as the Lemon Trees Grow. But I'm a bit nervous about this since I saw a lot of mixed reviews T_T
PLEASE DO NOT DISAPPOINT
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
REVIEW TO COME💔💔😭😭!!!!! I'M SO ANGRY, I'M SO MAD, I'M SO HURT, AND I FEEL SO HELPLESS💔💔!!!!!!!
💔🥀🖤I'm so ready to have my heart broken, but when I was approved for this ARC, I cried like a baby💔🥀🖤 !!!!!!!!!
💔🥀🖤I'm so ready to have my heart broken, but when I was approved for this ARC, I cried like a baby💔🥀🖤 !!!!!!!!!
Want to Read
February 22, 2026ˏˋ°•*⁀➷・❥・𝓹𝓻𝓮𝓿𝓲𝓮𝔀・❥・ˏˋ°•*⁀➷
⤿🪼19/02/26
OMG I GOT THE ARC, LITERALLY THE BEST RAMADAN GIFT EVER!!😭💓 I can't believe I have her now *crying in disbelief* It's "READ NOW" in netgalley for the next 24 hours, SO RUN BESTIES!!!!!🏃🏻♀️➡️🏃🏻♀️➡️🏃🏻♀️➡️🏃🏻♀️➡️
⤿🪼28/01/26
the cover is revealed now OMG SHE'S A BEAUTY 🥹😭💘 I've been camping out here for 4 YEARS AAAA I'M ABSOLUTELY GOING FERAL RN Y'ALL HAVE NO IDEA ASDFGHJKL 😩✋🏻
⤿🪼19/02/26
OMG I GOT THE ARC, LITERALLY THE BEST RAMADAN GIFT EVER!!😭💓 I can't believe I have her now *crying in disbelief* It's "READ NOW" in netgalley for the next 24 hours, SO RUN BESTIES!!!!!🏃🏻♀️➡️🏃🏻♀️➡️🏃🏻♀️➡️🏃🏻♀️➡️
⤿🪼28/01/26
the cover is revealed now OMG SHE'S A BEAUTY 🥹😭💘 I've been camping out here for 4 YEARS AAAA I'M ABSOLUTELY GOING FERAL RN Y'ALL HAVE NO IDEA ASDFGHJKL 😩✋🏻
Want to Read
October 22, 2025everyone. what book did i read june 4th of 2025 FOR THE FIRST TIME??? as long as the lemon trees grow! what is now COMING OUT june 4th 2026? THE OCEAN WOULD PAINT ME BLUE. what else takes place on june 4th?? MY BIRTHDAY. GUYS. THIS BOOK IS COMING OUT ON MY BIRTHDAY AFTER I READ LEMON TREES THIS YEAR ON MY BIRTHDAY.
THIS IS FATE.
THIS IS FATE.
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
thank you netgalley and little, brown books for the eARC—all thoughts are my own!
✦ publication date: june 02, 2026
TORE MY HEART OUT
when we read stories about islamophobia, we have to face a hard truth: hate it is a painful reality for millions of people. this story acts like a mirror to that hate. it shows a world where being different is used as a weapon. it shows how a judgmental look or harsh words can hurt someone deeply and stay with them for a long time. hate comes in many forms like a mean glance to actual physical violence. but the damage caused by this kind of hate is irreparable because, while a physical wounds might heal, the emotional pain caused by racism can last for a lifetime.
i couldn't put this book down. it was such an emotional story and i spent most of it in tears. zoulfa deals with bullying, grief, and loss in a way that feels so damn real and honest. the main character jihad, went through a lot of bad experiences, and her growth kept me until the very last page. the writing is sooo beautiful, haunting, and unforgettable. i truly don't have enough words to explain how much this book means to me.
please pick this up the moment it’s released. you won't regret it!
⤿ magical realism
⤿ grief and loss
⤿ friendship, identitity
⤿ romance as a sub plot
౨ৎ ⋮ more by zoulfa katouh
— as long as the lemon trees grow
✦ publication date: june 02, 2026
TORE MY HEART OUT
when we read stories about islamophobia, we have to face a hard truth: hate it is a painful reality for millions of people. this story acts like a mirror to that hate. it shows a world where being different is used as a weapon. it shows how a judgmental look or harsh words can hurt someone deeply and stay with them for a long time. hate comes in many forms like a mean glance to actual physical violence. but the damage caused by this kind of hate is irreparable because, while a physical wounds might heal, the emotional pain caused by racism can last for a lifetime.
i couldn't put this book down. it was such an emotional story and i spent most of it in tears. zoulfa deals with bullying, grief, and loss in a way that feels so damn real and honest. the main character jihad, went through a lot of bad experiences, and her growth kept me until the very last page. the writing is sooo beautiful, haunting, and unforgettable. i truly don't have enough words to explain how much this book means to me.
please pick this up the moment it’s released. you won't regret it!
⤿ magical realism
⤿ grief and loss
⤿ friendship, identitity
⤿ romance as a sub plot
౨ৎ ⋮ more by zoulfa katouh
— as long as the lemon trees grow
February 18, 2026
i did in fact have the pleasure of reading this a couple months ago and yes, i wept
I like to think of this book like A Very Large Expanse of Sea but respectful and with much better Muslim representation. it healed something in me that i didn't realize i had been hurting from, and spent the entire end of the book weeping – both in reflection for how beautiful this book was (i love Zoulfa's writing and will read literally anything she writes) but also mourning and grieving for the girl i was in high school who really, really needed to read this book. i feel lucky to live at the same time as books like Zoulfa's, whose FMCs are proud Muslims and pay a beautiful homage to Syria. this was easily one of the best books i've read.
I like to think of this book like A Very Large Expanse of Sea but respectful and with much better Muslim representation. it healed something in me that i didn't realize i had been hurting from, and spent the entire end of the book weeping – both in reflection for how beautiful this book was (i love Zoulfa's writing and will read literally anything she writes) but also mourning and grieving for the girl i was in high school who really, really needed to read this book. i feel lucky to live at the same time as books like Zoulfa's, whose FMCs are proud Muslims and pay a beautiful homage to Syria. this was easily one of the best books i've read.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
book #10 of m(arc)h challenge, where I try to read ALL the arcs I have in the month of March, which has now very clearly spilled into April, but I read most of this in March so I'm choosing to honor intent over technicality 😙💖
this is a deeply poignant read, a book that'll have you sobbing by the end. grief is not treated as one singular, dramatic event here, but something that alters everyday life.
the final third of this book is where everything becomes so much better. I did struggle with some of the characters, though: alexia's friends were wayyy too similar to each other and jamie felt almost too perfect to be real. I found myself wanting a little more *something* there, *something* that would make him feel less like an idea and more like a person. but even that didn't take away from my overall experience, which says a lot about how strong the writing was.
but jihad, i loved her. i loved how she chooses to not reduce herself. i loved how her faith is not diluted for palatability, nor is it framed defensively; it simply exists as something integral to her.
── .✦ pre-read 𖹭.ᐟ
got the arc yayyy!! 🥳
this is a deeply poignant read, a book that'll have you sobbing by the end. grief is not treated as one singular, dramatic event here, but something that alters everyday life.
the final third of this book is where everything becomes so much better. I did struggle with some of the characters, though: alexia's friends were wayyy too similar to each other and jamie felt almost too perfect to be real. I found myself wanting a little more *something* there, *something* that would make him feel less like an idea and more like a person. but even that didn't take away from my overall experience, which says a lot about how strong the writing was.
but jihad, i loved her. i loved how she chooses to not reduce herself. i loved how her faith is not diluted for palatability, nor is it framed defensively; it simply exists as something integral to her.
── .✦ pre-read 𖹭.ᐟ
got the arc yayyy!! 🥳
March 6, 2026
dnf @62%. I was really enjoying the book and liked the story a lot. Unfortunately, the fmc made it very hard for me to keep enjoying it.
I understand that the things she went through in her life aren’t easy to deal with, and trauma and discrimination can deeply affect how someone reacts in difficult situations. Still, I often found myself wishing she would stand up for herself. It was frustrating to watch people speak badly about her, her name, and her religion while she stayed silent. At times I just wanted to tell her: why let these idiots make you feel small just because you’re Arab and wear a hijab?
At the same time, I can recognize that her silence and hesitation might reflect the reality many people face when dealing with discrimination. Not everyone reacts with confidence or confrontation, and the fear of making things worse can be very real. In that sense, her reactions added a layer of realism to the character, even if it was difficult to watch her endure it.
Ultimately, I had to stop halfway through because the frustration outweighed my enjoyment, but I can still appreciate what the author may have been trying to portray through this character.
I understand that the things she went through in her life aren’t easy to deal with, and trauma and discrimination can deeply affect how someone reacts in difficult situations. Still, I often found myself wishing she would stand up for herself. It was frustrating to watch people speak badly about her, her name, and her religion while she stayed silent. At times I just wanted to tell her: why let these idiots make you feel small just because you’re Arab and wear a hijab?
At the same time, I can recognize that her silence and hesitation might reflect the reality many people face when dealing with discrimination. Not everyone reacts with confidence or confrontation, and the fear of making things worse can be very real. In that sense, her reactions added a layer of realism to the character, even if it was difficult to watch her endure it.
Ultimately, I had to stop halfway through because the frustration outweighed my enjoyment, but I can still appreciate what the author may have been trying to portray through this character.
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
I'm devastated, satisfied, and unsatisfied all at once. You can say my brain has erred. What happened to Jihad is no less than horrifying 😭 I don't know how she went through all of this and ended up being a decent human being 💔 She was so relatable; being a hijabi and grieving the loss of a parent myself the book physically touched my heart and utterly broke it. I'm both satisfied and unsatisfied simultaneously with the ending; knowing that Jihad didn't get to have her vengeance, yet also realizing that this was the only logical and realistic ending the book could have had. How I wished for an extended epilogue showing how Jihad and Jamie's relationship ended up. Absolutely One of the best books of 2026 💙
⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚𝕻𝖗𝖊-𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖉˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆
Update:
Oh my God you guys 😭😭😭😭😭 I've got a Ramadan gift 😭😭😭😭 and it's "read now" on Netgalley
⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚..........˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆
I've been stalking Zoulfa's IG for nearly two and a half years, waiting for this book, and now I'm checking NetGalley every single day, waiting for the ARC to be dropped. So please, please, please, give me the darn book. 😭
⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚𝕻𝖗𝖊-𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖉˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆
Update:
Oh my God you guys 😭😭😭😭😭 I've got a Ramadan gift 😭😭😭😭 and it's "read now" on Netgalley
⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚..........˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆
I've been stalking Zoulfa's IG for nearly two and a half years, waiting for this book, and now I'm checking NetGalley every single day, waiting for the ARC to be dropped. So please, please, please, give me the darn book. 😭
Want to Read
February 22, 2026After As Long as the Lemon Trees Grow...
I sense another masterpiece with this new release!
I NEED this book NOW!!!
💙💙💙💙
I sense another masterpiece with this new release!
I NEED this book NOW!!!
💙💙💙💙
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
🪼.⌗. three point five stars ★
⊱ publishing on june 2nd, 2026 ˎˊ˗
⠀ ⠀This was absolutely amazing. I adored every little thing about this book and barely have any complaints.
⠀ ⠀The writing style is what I loved most about this book. It was the very epitome of “show, not tell.” Emotions were described in vivid, dark colors; reading this gave me the same feeling I had whenever I blended my watercolor paints to my satisfaction. The resulting colors were not always the ones I had in mind, but the process of the brush dipping in water and the colors colliding to create something only in your imagination will never fail to be beautiful.
⠀ ⠀The plot was very intriguing. Not to mention, raw and realistic with a dash of magic. It is a well-known fact of the injustice muslim people face. I will never understand the ideology of one person in a community making a mistake resulting in the whole community facing punishment. America is dictated by a pedophile, but I don’t see people pointing fingers at white people and screaming “PEDO!!” Atlas, that’s just the harsh truth of the world, and this book unravels these truths perfectly. Watching our main character, Jihad, struggle as a hijabi and a girl who lost her mother was heartbreaking . The unfair treatment she faced just because of her name and the scarf she wrapped around her head had me frustrated at what society has shaped the world to be. The author did not spare mercy on us readers- she did not soften the reality of what muslims have to face, and I adored her for doing so. Not to mention, not only does Jihad face bullying in school, but she has to deal with financial and family issues. Oh, my heart!
⠀ ⠀The magical aspect of the book had to be the most interesting part of the book, though. The little dash of magic had to be the reason why this story would have any reader ensnared within all the words. Little blessings were being passed to the women in Jihad’s family that were not the normal superpowers in every fantasy book you read, but gifts that spoke to one’s heart. From talking to trees and learning the stories they keep in their roots to seeing the colors of a person’s soul.
⠀ ⠀My only complaint has to be that the ending was pretty dull, after all the conflict and drama the main character faces, I was expecting a much grander ending. But that’s just me.
✴︎ a special thank you to netgalley and author for an arc! 🌊⋆
⊱ publishing on june 2nd, 2026 ˎˊ˗
“I am a blade of grass, the drop of courage, the warmth in a mother's eyes, the sliver of moonlight guiding the path, the lilt of voices speaking in Arabic, the curve of the curlicues, the ink in the calligraphy inscribing poetry on marble walls, the sunrise orange, and the twilight blue.”
⠀ ⠀This was absolutely amazing. I adored every little thing about this book and barely have any complaints.
⠀ ⠀The writing style is what I loved most about this book. It was the very epitome of “show, not tell.” Emotions were described in vivid, dark colors; reading this gave me the same feeling I had whenever I blended my watercolor paints to my satisfaction. The resulting colors were not always the ones I had in mind, but the process of the brush dipping in water and the colors colliding to create something only in your imagination will never fail to be beautiful.
⠀ ⠀The plot was very intriguing. Not to mention, raw and realistic with a dash of magic. It is a well-known fact of the injustice muslim people face. I will never understand the ideology of one person in a community making a mistake resulting in the whole community facing punishment. America is dictated by a pedophile, but I don’t see people pointing fingers at white people and screaming “PEDO!!” Atlas, that’s just the harsh truth of the world, and this book unravels these truths perfectly. Watching our main character, Jihad, struggle as a hijabi and a girl who lost her mother was heartbreaking . The unfair treatment she faced just because of her name and the scarf she wrapped around her head had me frustrated at what society has shaped the world to be. The author did not spare mercy on us readers- she did not soften the reality of what muslims have to face, and I adored her for doing so. Not to mention, not only does Jihad face bullying in school, but she has to deal with financial and family issues. Oh, my heart!
⠀ ⠀The magical aspect of the book had to be the most interesting part of the book, though. The little dash of magic had to be the reason why this story would have any reader ensnared within all the words. Little blessings were being passed to the women in Jihad’s family that were not the normal superpowers in every fantasy book you read, but gifts that spoke to one’s heart. From talking to trees and learning the stories they keep in their roots to seeing the colors of a person’s soul.
⠀ ⠀My only complaint has to be that the ending was pretty dull, after all the conflict and drama the main character faces, I was expecting a much grander ending. But that’s just me.
✴︎ a special thank you to netgalley and author for an arc! 🌊⋆
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
3.5 ──★ !!
↳ ┆ .✦゛ 𝚂𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚎𝚍 : march 7 ˎˊ˗
↳ ┆ .✦ ゛𝙵𝚒𝚗𝚒𝚜𝚑𝚎𝚍 : march 19ˎˊ˗
· · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · ·
⟢ ❝ 𝐈 𝐚𝐦 𝐚 𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐬𝐬, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐫𝐨𝐩 𝐨𝐟 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐠𝐞, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐭𝐡 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫'𝐬 𝐞𝐲𝐞𝐬, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐨𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐠𝐮𝐢𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐡, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐥𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐯𝐨𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐀𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐜, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐯𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐮𝐞𝐬, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐡𝐲 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐛𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐨𝐞𝐭𝐫𝐲 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐬, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐛𝐥𝐮𝐞❞
₊˚꒰🪼꒱‧ 𝚂𝚢𝚗𝚘𝚙𝚜𝚒𝚜 ‧₊ ᵎᵎ 🐋
Seventeen year old Jihad Dabbagh can see life in colors, a magical gift from the women in her family. But after her mom dies, everything turns gray and she can’t feel or see the colors anymore.Her family doesn’t get it, so her dad sends her to a fancy school. There, she sticks out because of her name and hijab and faces a lot of hate. The only thing that helps her is an old sketchbook from her mom’s Syrian hometown. Jihad starts painting again, pouring her grief and pain into the story of her mom’s life.Then, her art starts appearing mysteriously all over New York, going viral and getting her noticed but also putting her in trouble. To find herself and her voice again, Jihad has to embrace her talent and her mother’s story to build a new future.
· · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · ·
₊˚꒰🪼꒱‧ 𝚃𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚜 ‧₊ ᵎᵎ 🐋
I felt like it was extremely long and boring. Slow paced. The only part where I was not bored was towards the ending. I wished the book ended with more closure, about Jamie and Jihad’s relationship. And the characters lacked depth. All friends of Alexis seemed like the same person, with no original personality. In every good book, the character must have their strengths as well as their weakness and flaws , which make them more humane. The author intended to create Jamie as the perfect bf and male friend , but should’ve added some flaws to his character because with his perfect personality, he looked more like a superhuman. Amal was a great sister. The writing style was YA-ish and modest, very simple, which didn’t align with my taste.
The plot, about Muslims facing bullying and racism, was very raw and realistic. It genuinely shocks me that how people with peanut sized brain, based on the actions of a few people, can characterise an ENTIRE community. Muslims are genuinely one of the most kind and soft spoken people I’ve ever met. I think it would resonate more with the people in Muslim community. The amount of problem people have with a girl covering her head with a piece of cloth , OH MY GOD ITS NOT THAT HARD TO MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS. It’s genuinely terrible how much bullying she had to face. Our dearest FMC, proceeds to do nothing about the bullying , because ofc why would the principal ever trust her?( he GENUINELY pmo so much ugh) Yes it was frustrating to see her not taking stand for herself, but She did take an initiative at the end and I sighed in relief. I love how strong and brave she was, if I were her I wouldve genuinely kms.
· · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · ·
₊˚꒰🪼꒱‧ 𝙵𝚒𝚗𝚊𝚕 𝚅𝚎𝚛𝚍𝚒𝚌𝚝 ‧₊ ᵎᵎ 🐋
It was a okayish book and I prefer Khaled hosseini’s books but nevertheless I would still recommend it!!
↳ ┆ .✦゛𝙿𝚞𝚋𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚍𝚊𝚝𝚎 : june 2 ˎˊ
⤷ Thank you Netgalley and Little, Brown Books for Young Readers and The author for this arc in exchange for an honest review! 💓
↳ ┆ .✦゛ 𝚂𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚎𝚍 : march 7 ˎˊ˗
↳ ┆ .✦ ゛𝙵𝚒𝚗𝚒𝚜𝚑𝚎𝚍 : march 19ˎˊ˗
· · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · ·
⟢ ❝ 𝐈 𝐚𝐦 𝐚 𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐬𝐬, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐫𝐨𝐩 𝐨𝐟 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐠𝐞, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐭𝐡 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫'𝐬 𝐞𝐲𝐞𝐬, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐨𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐠𝐮𝐢𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐡, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐥𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐯𝐨𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐀𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐜, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐯𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐮𝐞𝐬, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐡𝐲 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐛𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐨𝐞𝐭𝐫𝐲 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐬, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐛𝐥𝐮𝐞❞
₊˚꒰🪼꒱‧ 𝚂𝚢𝚗𝚘𝚙𝚜𝚒𝚜 ‧₊ ᵎᵎ 🐋
Seventeen year old Jihad Dabbagh can see life in colors, a magical gift from the women in her family. But after her mom dies, everything turns gray and she can’t feel or see the colors anymore.Her family doesn’t get it, so her dad sends her to a fancy school. There, she sticks out because of her name and hijab and faces a lot of hate. The only thing that helps her is an old sketchbook from her mom’s Syrian hometown. Jihad starts painting again, pouring her grief and pain into the story of her mom’s life.Then, her art starts appearing mysteriously all over New York, going viral and getting her noticed but also putting her in trouble. To find herself and her voice again, Jihad has to embrace her talent and her mother’s story to build a new future.
· · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · ·
₊˚꒰🪼꒱‧ 𝚃𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚜 ‧₊ ᵎᵎ 🐋
I felt like it was extremely long and boring. Slow paced. The only part where I was not bored was towards the ending. I wished the book ended with more closure, about Jamie and Jihad’s relationship. And the characters lacked depth. All friends of Alexis seemed like the same person, with no original personality. In every good book, the character must have their strengths as well as their weakness and flaws , which make them more humane. The author intended to create Jamie as the perfect bf and male friend , but should’ve added some flaws to his character because with his perfect personality, he looked more like a superhuman. Amal was a great sister. The writing style was YA-ish and modest, very simple, which didn’t align with my taste.
The plot, about Muslims facing bullying and racism, was very raw and realistic. It genuinely shocks me that how people with peanut sized brain, based on the actions of a few people, can characterise an ENTIRE community. Muslims are genuinely one of the most kind and soft spoken people I’ve ever met. I think it would resonate more with the people in Muslim community. The amount of problem people have with a girl covering her head with a piece of cloth , OH MY GOD ITS NOT THAT HARD TO MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS. It’s genuinely terrible how much bullying she had to face. Our dearest FMC, proceeds to do nothing about the bullying , because ofc why would the principal ever trust her?( he GENUINELY pmo so much ugh) Yes it was frustrating to see her not taking stand for herself, but She did take an initiative at the end and I sighed in relief. I love how strong and brave she was, if I were her I wouldve genuinely kms.
· · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · · · · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · ·
₊˚꒰🪼꒱‧ 𝙵𝚒𝚗𝚊𝚕 𝚅𝚎𝚛𝚍𝚒𝚌𝚝 ‧₊ ᵎᵎ 🐋
It was a okayish book and I prefer Khaled hosseini’s books but nevertheless I would still recommend it!!
↳ ┆ .✦゛𝙿𝚞𝚋𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚍𝚊𝚝𝚎 : june 2 ˎˊ
⤷ Thank you Netgalley and Little, Brown Books for Young Readers and The author for this arc in exchange for an honest review! 💓
March 7, 2026
Edit: this book did absolutely destroy me in the best way possible
I know this book is absolutely going to destroy me and I’m ready.
I know this book is absolutely going to destroy me and I’m ready.
Want to Read
December 25, 2025
Okay Okay Okay 🌬
I haven’t read the novel yet, but I am waiting for it on pins and needles! I just know it’s going to break me and leave a mark on my heart that I’ll never forget. Why? The answer is simple: first, because it’s written by Zoulfa; second, just the title alone makes me pause and reflect; and third, because I know she writes with such sincere honesty.
It’s as if she actually lived with the characters—they aren't just ink on paper, they feel completely real. As a reader, I live alongside them and feel their presence in this world. I find pieces of myself within them, and I’ll never forget the hope that is planted in the reader by the end of the story.
The ocean would paint me blue
Why I’m hyped! I’m definitely not alone—everyone who loved her previous novel feels the exact same way.
To be honest, my heart is bursting with energy to read this, and I really hope I’ll be among the very first to dive into it... This is probably the first time in my entire reading history that I’ve felt this level of hype for a new release. It has truly never happened to me before!!
I can’t wait to stop talking about it and actually judge it properly, but for now: expect beauty, expect depth, and bring tissues (or sunglasses)!! I wonder... what is Zoulfa going to do to me this time?
''You are the entire ocean in a drop.''
Okay Okay Okay 🌬
I haven’t read the novel yet, but I am waiting for it on pins and needles! I just know it’s going to break me and leave a mark on my heart that I’ll never forget. Why? The answer is simple: first, because it’s written by Zoulfa; second, just the title alone makes me pause and reflect; and third, because I know she writes with such sincere honesty.
It’s as if she actually lived with the characters—they aren't just ink on paper, they feel completely real. As a reader, I live alongside them and feel their presence in this world. I find pieces of myself within them, and I’ll never forget the hope that is planted in the reader by the end of the story.
The ocean would paint me blue
Why I’m hyped! I’m definitely not alone—everyone who loved her previous novel feels the exact same way.
''You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty.''
To be honest, my heart is bursting with energy to read this, and I really hope I’ll be among the very first to dive into it... This is probably the first time in my entire reading history that I’ve felt this level of hype for a new release. It has truly never happened to me before!!
''The sea, once it casts its spell, holds one in its net of wonder forever.''
I can’t wait to stop talking about it and actually judge it properly, but for now: expect beauty, expect depth, and bring tissues (or sunglasses)!! I wonder... what is Zoulfa going to do to me this time?
February 22, 2026
initial reaction: actually one of the most devastating books I’ve ever read, sending Zoulfa my therapy bill brb
Where do I even start? This book is everything. It's heartbreaking, it's healing, it's tragic and hopeful all in one. I think the instinct will be to compare this to As Long As The Lemon Trees Grow and I cannot emphasize enough how different this book this. While it is also devastating, it is a different kind of devastation.
I started crying a few pages in this book and I don't think I ever stopped. The grief that is stepped in these pages is overwhelming, my chest ached more and more with every chapter. I'm crying writing this review just thinking about it. And it's not just the grief of a lost parent. It's the grief of a childhood lost to Islamophobia and a country we long for.
Zoulfa always does an incredible job of putting her readers back together after she's broken them and this book truly healed me, and I am a better person for reading it. I was seen and validated and comforted. I love everything about this book and these characters and I cannot recommend it enough.
Where do I even start? This book is everything. It's heartbreaking, it's healing, it's tragic and hopeful all in one. I think the instinct will be to compare this to As Long As The Lemon Trees Grow and I cannot emphasize enough how different this book this. While it is also devastating, it is a different kind of devastation.
I started crying a few pages in this book and I don't think I ever stopped. The grief that is stepped in these pages is overwhelming, my chest ached more and more with every chapter. I'm crying writing this review just thinking about it. And it's not just the grief of a lost parent. It's the grief of a childhood lost to Islamophobia and a country we long for.
Zoulfa always does an incredible job of putting her readers back together after she's broken them and this book truly healed me, and I am a better person for reading it. I was seen and validated and comforted. I love everything about this book and these characters and I cannot recommend it enough.
Want to Read
October 22, 2025Yesssss...now this's my cue!!!
I looooved Zoulfah Katouh's prev novel As Long as the Lemon Trees Grow and I'm not kidding when I'm saying that I've starved for this book...finally it's announced....wooooooohooooooo!!!!
I looooved Zoulfah Katouh's prev novel As Long as the Lemon Trees Grow and I'm not kidding when I'm saying that I've starved for this book...finally it's announced....wooooooohooooooo!!!!
Want to Read
October 22, 2025BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ANNOUNCEMENT FOR MONTHS HELL YEAH ZOULFA OUR QUEEN
Currently Reading
May 12, 2026I have the arc but what I don't have is a single second of free time to read it helpp
SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UPP
SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UPP
April 19, 2026
i read this book a few months back when it wasn't officially announced, and having to keep quiet about one of the most beautiful books i've had the pleasure to read was legitimately gruelling. zoulfa has long been one of my absolute favorite authors; she builds skyscapes out of nothing but words and simple sentences, characters that echo past the narrative and come alive on paper. she is my favorite storyteller.
the ocean would paint me blue took me right back home with the same melodic, resounding prose that surrounded as long as the lemon trees grow. this is a story that's hopeful and in the same breath anguished, about grief, but also about love. i could never describe everything it meant to me, and the tender, soft spots it touched: what it means to be a girl who finds her place in colors and pigments and pages, what it means to be left behind and carry on, to be surrounded by the embers of lost love and finding shreds of hope in it despite. more than anything else, perhaps, it's a story about what it means to be a muslim girl in a world that's already cast you in a certain role, how a slip of cloth alienates you, vilifies you, in a unique situation i think no one outside of it can quite comprehend. i've read a lot of books in my life, and i have never, never come across something as poignant, as beautiful, as thoughtful as this book. every choice—and i do mean every single small, microscopic choice—is made with so much intent it shines through the paper. it's a book that's a love letter to syria, but also a love letter to muslim girls, hijabi girls, a love letter to everyone lost and cornered and finding their way out. it's a love letter to the sea, that bridges a soul to their homeland, a love letter to the crystal blue you find in waves and in the fluorescence of a jellyfish. it's the hard choices you have to make, and the life you can spend reeling from something you never saw coming. the unfairness of the world and the beauty in spite of it. it's one unforgiving brushstroke at a time, and it coalesces into this beautiful, stunning painting that, honestly, try as i might, i'll never be able to fully, properly articulate. i loved the character work and the writing, i loved how every choice and turn the narrative takes is done so naturally and with insistence, how at every instance, the love shines through the ache.
this is a book that i think we've always deserved, a book that takes it upon itself to stand for a reality that's been so contorted, words that have been maligned and used against us for so long. this is a book that i wish had been there for me when i was fifteen and so scared, and i am so elated now that it's finally going to release: there's going to be some muslim girl in the world, reading these words, and know she belongs. that she can paint her own sky, her own ocean, and it doesn't have to bend to what the world might try to impose. that is important. that is what literature means, what everything is for, at the end of the day. there is hope in these pages. there is conviction: that things can be, will be better.
thank you so much to the author for the advanced copy. 5/5 stars.
the ocean would paint me blue took me right back home with the same melodic, resounding prose that surrounded as long as the lemon trees grow. this is a story that's hopeful and in the same breath anguished, about grief, but also about love. i could never describe everything it meant to me, and the tender, soft spots it touched: what it means to be a girl who finds her place in colors and pigments and pages, what it means to be left behind and carry on, to be surrounded by the embers of lost love and finding shreds of hope in it despite. more than anything else, perhaps, it's a story about what it means to be a muslim girl in a world that's already cast you in a certain role, how a slip of cloth alienates you, vilifies you, in a unique situation i think no one outside of it can quite comprehend. i've read a lot of books in my life, and i have never, never come across something as poignant, as beautiful, as thoughtful as this book. every choice—and i do mean every single small, microscopic choice—is made with so much intent it shines through the paper. it's a book that's a love letter to syria, but also a love letter to muslim girls, hijabi girls, a love letter to everyone lost and cornered and finding their way out. it's a love letter to the sea, that bridges a soul to their homeland, a love letter to the crystal blue you find in waves and in the fluorescence of a jellyfish. it's the hard choices you have to make, and the life you can spend reeling from something you never saw coming. the unfairness of the world and the beauty in spite of it. it's one unforgiving brushstroke at a time, and it coalesces into this beautiful, stunning painting that, honestly, try as i might, i'll never be able to fully, properly articulate. i loved the character work and the writing, i loved how every choice and turn the narrative takes is done so naturally and with insistence, how at every instance, the love shines through the ache.
this is a book that i think we've always deserved, a book that takes it upon itself to stand for a reality that's been so contorted, words that have been maligned and used against us for so long. this is a book that i wish had been there for me when i was fifteen and so scared, and i am so elated now that it's finally going to release: there's going to be some muslim girl in the world, reading these words, and know she belongs. that she can paint her own sky, her own ocean, and it doesn't have to bend to what the world might try to impose. that is important. that is what literature means, what everything is for, at the end of the day. there is hope in these pages. there is conviction: that things can be, will be better.
thank you so much to the author for the advanced copy. 5/5 stars.
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
thank you to netgalley and the publisher for the arc in exchange for my honest review
The ocean would paint me blue🌊
5 stars𓇼
Here I am again after getting absolutely destroyed by a zoulfa katouh book. I don't know what she puts in her books and characters, but I always end up attached to them in a way you would be attached to family members. This book had some hard subjects and themes discussed like racism, abuse, islamaphobia, grief and depression. And I think that zoulfa did that wonderfully, with her character who's name is jihad.
𓇼 ⋆.˚ 𓆉 𓆝 𓆡⋆.˚ 𓇼
Oh, jihad, words could never describe how much your name suits you, and how much you deserve to be called that. Jihad is a character that describes exactly what this word means with her struggles and determination. How can one go through so much and still wake up in the morning to do it all over again? She did that because she is a jihadi.
Jihad is a 17 year old syrian girl, who lives in New York with her family, and who also lost her mother a year ago. As she is going through her last year of high-school, she faces all kinds of bullying, abuse, and humiliation a person could endure due to her religion, and the hijab she wears on her head. But jihad isn't only her struggles, she is also a very talented artist who paints incredibly, which is something she stopped doing since her mother's death, who caused her to lose her ability of seeing colours. Jihad eventually finds a way to help herself and to tell her mother's story through her paintings, and her story starts here.
This books showed all the stereotypes and false accusations that Muslims get, it showed how it's always the people who know nothing about Islam that tend to accuse the religion of these "stereotypes". Unlike what most people would do, jihad doesn't try to explain herself or try to deny the accusations that are put upon her, she doesn't try to change anything about her appearance or beliefs in order to be able to get accepted into the society that she is in. Instead, she holds onto those beliefs, and she finds comfort in her hijab. She shows up everyday, forcing everyone to accept her presence, even if they don't like it.
𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞
Along her journey, jihad meets Jamie in school, who becomes her support during that year, and bonds with her over both their heritages, Jamie is a quarter Vietnamese from his mother's side, and while he lived all his life in the USA, he is still very attached to his homeland, just like jihad, who never went to Syria but always felt the need to be there and connect with her land because of her mother's stories. Their friendship is everything, I got so attached to these to I would genuinely cry everytime something wholesome would happen between them. I know that this wasn't about the romance, but I can’t deny that I really needed more of them towards the end, a satisfying ending to their story. I think this is something that will forever keep popping into my head every now and then reminding me of how much I needed closure.
𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞
I don't think I could describe how much this book touched my soul no matter how much I try to write about it. It reminded me of why I love reading, why I love exploring different people's lifes and souls, and jihad was one of the souls that I loved exploring. I will forever remember her. I learned so much from this girl, things that I will be remembering throughout my life. I am proud of her as if I know her personally, and I think I really do.
𓇼 ⋆.˚ 𓆉 𓆝 𓆡⋆.˚ 𓇼
Thank you zoulfa for showing Islam in your books, for balancing the struggles with how much they actually make us stronger and bring us closer to it. For showing your heritage in such a beautiful way, making me want to see it with my own eyes in real life. As an egyptian, I already have so much love for Syrians, we lived among you guys for years, and your books never failed to increase this love.
The ocean would paint me blue🌊
5 stars𓇼
Here I am again after getting absolutely destroyed by a zoulfa katouh book. I don't know what she puts in her books and characters, but I always end up attached to them in a way you would be attached to family members. This book had some hard subjects and themes discussed like racism, abuse, islamaphobia, grief and depression. And I think that zoulfa did that wonderfully, with her character who's name is jihad.
𓇼 ⋆.˚ 𓆉 𓆝 𓆡⋆.˚ 𓇼
Oh, jihad, words could never describe how much your name suits you, and how much you deserve to be called that. Jihad is a character that describes exactly what this word means with her struggles and determination. How can one go through so much and still wake up in the morning to do it all over again? She did that because she is a jihadi.
Jihad is a 17 year old syrian girl, who lives in New York with her family, and who also lost her mother a year ago. As she is going through her last year of high-school, she faces all kinds of bullying, abuse, and humiliation a person could endure due to her religion, and the hijab she wears on her head. But jihad isn't only her struggles, she is also a very talented artist who paints incredibly, which is something she stopped doing since her mother's death, who caused her to lose her ability of seeing colours. Jihad eventually finds a way to help herself and to tell her mother's story through her paintings, and her story starts here.
🐚I can do this.
I can do this. I am brave. I am jihad🐚
This books showed all the stereotypes and false accusations that Muslims get, it showed how it's always the people who know nothing about Islam that tend to accuse the religion of these "stereotypes". Unlike what most people would do, jihad doesn't try to explain herself or try to deny the accusations that are put upon her, she doesn't try to change anything about her appearance or beliefs in order to be able to get accepted into the society that she is in. Instead, she holds onto those beliefs, and she finds comfort in her hijab. She shows up everyday, forcing everyone to accept her presence, even if they don't like it.
𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞
Along her journey, jihad meets Jamie in school, who becomes her support during that year, and bonds with her over both their heritages, Jamie is a quarter Vietnamese from his mother's side, and while he lived all his life in the USA, he is still very attached to his homeland, just like jihad, who never went to Syria but always felt the need to be there and connect with her land because of her mother's stories. Their friendship is everything, I got so attached to these to I would genuinely cry everytime something wholesome would happen between them. I know that this wasn't about the romance, but I can’t deny that I really needed more of them towards the end, a satisfying ending to their story. I think this is something that will forever keep popping into my head every now and then reminding me of how much I needed closure.
🐚"I want you to know she's changed my life, and I'm just the beginning of a long list of people who will absolutely love her. Thank you for her. Thank you for naming her jihad. She's all the colors of bravery"🐚
𓆝 𓆟 𓆞𓆝 𓆟 𓆞
I don't think I could describe how much this book touched my soul no matter how much I try to write about it. It reminded me of why I love reading, why I love exploring different people's lifes and souls, and jihad was one of the souls that I loved exploring. I will forever remember her. I learned so much from this girl, things that I will be remembering throughout my life. I am proud of her as if I know her personally, and I think I really do.
"They took my hijab, tore it, stepped on it, and raised it on a pole.
So I will take the American flag and make it worth something on the statue of liberty. I will take their humiliation and make it my pride."
𓇼 ⋆.˚ 𓆉 𓆝 𓆡⋆.˚ 𓇼
Thank you zoulfa for showing Islam in your books, for balancing the struggles with how much they actually make us stronger and bring us closer to it. For showing your heritage in such a beautiful way, making me want to see it with my own eyes in real life. As an egyptian, I already have so much love for Syrians, we lived among you guys for years, and your books never failed to increase this love.
February 20, 2026
Seventeen-year-old Jihad Dabbagh comes from a lineage of women blessed with magical sight, the ability to see the world in breathtaking, luminous color. But after her mother’s sudden death, that gift drains away, leaving everything muted in shades of gray. Grief doesn’t just hollow her out emotionally; it reshapes the way she sees the world.
When Jihad is sent to an elite academy where her name and hijab make her an easy target, she becomes hypervisible in all the worst ways. Whispers. Assumptions. Words like terrorist, alien, immigrant flung carelessly, weaponized without thought. In the midst of that isolation, she finds refuge in an old sketchbook tied to her family’s history in Syria. As she paints her grief, and her mother’s story, her artwork begins appearing mysteriously across New York City, impossible to ignore. Suddenly, the girl who wanted to disappear is thrust into the spotlight and danger at her school.
This is an important read, not just for high schoolers, but for anyone navigating a world where rhetoric about identity is too often stripped of empathy. At its core, it’s a coming-of-age story about a Muslim girl reclaiming her voice, her faith, and her sense of self in a society that constantly tries to define her from misinformation and false narratives, ignorance, and antipathy.
While the magical realism sometimes feels more atmospheric than integral, and the student bickering may skew younger than some readers expect, the heart of this story is undeniable. It confronts prejudice, grief, and systemic bias with honesty and urgency. More than anything, it invites readers to sit with discomfort, to examine assumptions, and to extend empathy toward those who endure discrimination and racism daily.
It’s not just a story about seeing color, it’s about learning to truly see people.
When Jihad is sent to an elite academy where her name and hijab make her an easy target, she becomes hypervisible in all the worst ways. Whispers. Assumptions. Words like terrorist, alien, immigrant flung carelessly, weaponized without thought. In the midst of that isolation, she finds refuge in an old sketchbook tied to her family’s history in Syria. As she paints her grief, and her mother’s story, her artwork begins appearing mysteriously across New York City, impossible to ignore. Suddenly, the girl who wanted to disappear is thrust into the spotlight and danger at her school.
This is an important read, not just for high schoolers, but for anyone navigating a world where rhetoric about identity is too often stripped of empathy. At its core, it’s a coming-of-age story about a Muslim girl reclaiming her voice, her faith, and her sense of self in a society that constantly tries to define her from misinformation and false narratives, ignorance, and antipathy.
While the magical realism sometimes feels more atmospheric than integral, and the student bickering may skew younger than some readers expect, the heart of this story is undeniable. It confronts prejudice, grief, and systemic bias with honesty and urgency. More than anything, it invites readers to sit with discomfort, to examine assumptions, and to extend empathy toward those who endure discrimination and racism daily.
It’s not just a story about seeing color, it’s about learning to truly see people.
Want to Read
February 26, 2026Zoulfa is back!! Can we please skip to June?
After cover real:
How does she come up with the most beautiful book covers?!
After cover real:
How does she come up with the most beautiful book covers?!
April 21, 2026
3.5⭐️ I’ll be back with a full review once I’ve processed this because it was A LOT!
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the arc
Upon reflection this story has left a bitter after taste in my mouth. While I read it I was completely invested and loved the characters, now though I find myself venting about the book. The book tackles Islamophobia and depression/grief first and foremost and there just seems to be so much anger and heaviness in the book. That’s not necessarily a bad thing but for my brain it just doesn’t feel productive. Which I know a book should be telling a story but when a book like this, which is representing a huge group of people that rarely get represented the pressure on each narrative becomes much more potent. It’s unfair but so would me inflating this rating be. I still loved the writing and would read another book by this author. Also something to be aware of is there is a subplot of romance in this book that I would argue isn’t strictly halal, despite there being no physical contact between the two parties.
To clarify; the Islamophobia rubbed me the wrong way because of how extreme it was and how many instances happened in this book. This might be someone’s story I don’t argue that but it was a lot and didn’t really make sense why the character didn’t herself out of the situation and prioritise her safety especially considering her past. I don’t know that this is a helpful book for young Muslim women or if the goal is to raise awareness of things we might experience to people who aren’t Muslim?
Upon reflection this story has left a bitter after taste in my mouth. While I read it I was completely invested and loved the characters, now though I find myself venting about the book. The book tackles Islamophobia and depression/grief first and foremost and there just seems to be so much anger and heaviness in the book. That’s not necessarily a bad thing but for my brain it just doesn’t feel productive. Which I know a book should be telling a story but when a book like this, which is representing a huge group of people that rarely get represented the pressure on each narrative becomes much more potent. It’s unfair but so would me inflating this rating be. I still loved the writing and would read another book by this author. Also something to be aware of is there is a subplot of romance in this book that I would argue isn’t strictly halal, despite there being no physical contact between the two parties.
To clarify; the Islamophobia rubbed me the wrong way because of how extreme it was and how many instances happened in this book. This might be someone’s story I don’t argue that but it was a lot and didn’t really make sense why the character didn’t herself out of the situation and prioritise her safety especially considering her past. I don’t know that this is a helpful book for young Muslim women or if the goal is to raise awareness of things we might experience to people who aren’t Muslim?
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Want to Read
February 19, 2026DID I JUST GET MY FIRST EVER EVER ARC?? OH MY GAWDDDDD I AM GOING FERAL.
Review of advance copy received from Edelweiss+
My heart hurts.
Want to Read
March 4, 2026i absolutely cannot wait to suffer and have my heart be broken into a thousand pieces by another zoulfa katouh novel 😍😍😍
i have been ANTICIPATING this book!!! even more so since i met zoulfa coincidentally in waterstones when she came to london last month, and i actually spoke to her too she was so so sweet omg core memory 🥹🥹🤍
i have been ANTICIPATING this book!!! even more so since i met zoulfa coincidentally in waterstones when she came to london last month, and i actually spoke to her too she was so so sweet omg core memory 🥹🥹🤍
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