To Have and to Hold

by Deb L Brown

When life doesn’t go according to plan, perfectionist Amelia must trade control for faith—and find joy in the beautiful mess of becoming a mother.

To Have and to Hold is a contemporary Christian novel that weaves heartache, humor, and hope into the unpredictable journey toward parenthood. Amelia Greathouse is a meticulous event planner who thrives on structure, checklists, and perfection. She wants to have it all—marriage, a career, and a family. Her husband, Melvin, is a creative museum curator with a spontaneous streak that keeps her grounded—and sometimes off balance. Together, they make a loving but unlikely pair.

When infertility turns their plans upside down, their marriage and faith are pushed to the brink. From invasive treatments to a devastating miscarriage, Amelia's pursuit of motherhood becomes all-consuming. As she supports her best friend’s pregnancy and silently compares herself to the chaotic moms around her, she feels increasingly broken and alone. At work, a major opportunity tempts her to prove her worth—but at what cost?

Just as joy seems within reach, a heartbreaking setback threatens to unravel everything. Told with warmth and wit, To Have and to Hold explores the tension between striving and surrender, and the power of faith to carry us through life’s detours—toward the family we never expected but were meant to have.

307 pages, Paperback

Published October 13, 2025

About the author

DEB L. BROWN writes stories that explore loyalty in marriage and faith in God when facing life’s challenges. A member of the American Christian Fiction Writers and Women’s Fiction Writers Association, her books handle heavy issues with a touch of humor. She’s mom to her five children and Graham Cracker to her grandchildren. She lives with her husband in Minnesota.

Reviews

[Melissa (christianbooksandcoffee) · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a beautiful story. I really liked it. Amelia and Melvin struggle with infertility. The author does a wonderful job with describing the heartache that comes with that. As someone who has personally struggled with infertility and many miscarriages, I can relate to the couple in this story. If you have struggled with this please note you may cry as I did. That being said, the story was very well done, and there is a happy ending amongst all the heartache. I really loved the characters, and felt the emotions were very realistic. There is great Christian content as well. Overall, a great story.
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Content: infertility, miscarriage, adoption

I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book which I received from the author. All views expressed are only my honest opinion.

[Aprilslibrary · Rating 5 out of 5]

Deb Brown wrote a beautiful story about love and loss. I am not someone who has dealt with infertility or navigating the emotions connected with loss, but this story opened that window for me to understand those feelings. This story was beautifully written and was filled with hope. I am not one who often reads contemporary woman’s fiction, but I was sucked into the world of Amelia and Melvin, their love for each other and their pursuit to start a family. I will hold onto this one in my heart for a long time.

I feel this story could be healing to those who are navigating loss, infertility, or are in the adoption process. This one is for you.

*I was sent a copy of this book by the author. My opinions are all my own.

[Kelly-Ann ~ Sassy Bookish Mama · Rating 4 out of 5]

This author has tackled the topic of infertility which a lot of women go through and she did it in a tactful and yet meaningful way. She goes through the different emotions and different avenues in which you can become a mom and the hurdles and grief that each step takes.

Both Amelia and Melvin go through a lot of emotions. I really had a hard time with Amelia because although I completely understood her desire for motherhood, I found her lack of understanding towards Melvin a bit annoying at times. I have never gone through anything like this so these are just my feelings while reading the story. I thought both characters walked in a manner of faith that wavered as they went through each loss but it made them real and human which was good to see in a story.

Overall I thought the author did a good job with this story and I think it will be a relatable on to those that have gone through this.

I received a copy of this book for review. All views expressed are my own.

[Diane Bowen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I just finished my advanced reader copy of To Have and To Hold by Deb L Brown. What a story to pull on the heart strings!

This story is about a couple, Amelia and Melvin, that are dealing with infertility. And while I haven’t experienced infertility, I have dealt with life not turning out the way I expected and “waiting on the Lord” in hopes I could receive the desires of my heart. I loved reading the story from Amelia’s point of view and being privy to her inner dialogue. Since finishing this book, my goal is to be more sensitive and more caring in my interactions with others knowing we all have struggles the eyes cannot see.

I highly recommend this book that delicately weaves the joys and sorrows of life throughout its pages. To Have and to Hold launches on October 13. Find the book on Amazon: https://amzn.to/46hLwnx

[Veray · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a difficult subject to read about. It is well written and tastefully done. It did made me cry a few times as I have experienced some of the things represented in this story. The ending was very satisfying.

[Rachel · Rating 5 out of 5]

I thoroughly enjoyed this book. The theme of faith, hope, and resilience through trials was beautifully shared. I've never been through pregnancy or infant loss so I can't say I could understand what Amelia and Melvin were going through but the way the author artfully and tactfully described it tugged at my hearstrings. At the lowest point for Amelia in the book (without spoiling anything) I cried with her. I couldn't even begin to imagine the pain she was feeling and trauma she went through.
As a parent, I enjoyed reading when she and Melvin babysat Ruby. We're all the perfect parents until we have kids and this humorously depicted that.
I loved seeing them grow from just adults to parents. Amelia was a good person but it seemed that she had some silly annoyances that she had to learn how to manage. Melvin was a great and supportive husband but he also had to learn how to become more of a couple as they both overcame grief and pain.
I think my favorite description in the book was when Amelia visited the restaurant and the author described it as a ballet waiting to begin in the dining room while the kitchen was the ballet in full swing. I've never thought of it like that but it really lent vision to what everything actually looked like.
It was refreshing to read something without swearing, violence, or sex. I would definitely recommend this book for anyone because it's a breath of fresh air. Faith, growing, trust in God, and families. Beautiful themes and beautiful message. I'm excited for more!

[Kathleen Basi · Rating 5 out of 5]

In “To Have and to Hold,” Deb Brown paints an sensitive and oh-so-real portrait of the rollercoaster that is infertility, pregnancy loss, and adoption. Those who have experienced any of these realities will recognize themselves in Amelia and Melvin: the stress, the conflict, the need for grace and forgiveness in marriage, the raging at God, and the difficulty of discerning how much to tell and to whom. Women who have gone through these experiences know that no matter what you tell or don’t tell others, the responses will always cause you further pain. This book should be required reading for all people of good will who have not walked this road. Perhaps it can bear fruit in a community of people better able to understand and support those who weather some of life’s most difficult journeys.

[Virginia McCullough · Rating 5 out of 5]

This author skillfully created an emotional journey I jumped on fast and never left. The beginning hooked me immediately, and I was right there with the fertility issues, which were made real for those of us who don't know firsthand. I was especially glad the author introduced adoption early on, and having adopted my second child many decades ago (before open adoption) through an agency, I had my fingers crossed for this couple in this more complicated adoption era. This is modern women's fiction, with a strong religious element, but I'd consider it a crossover book. I don't share the religion but it didn't interfere with my ability to root for the characters and their universal dilemmas in building a marriage and a family. A lovely story. Highly recommended.

[Aleah Donald · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was privileged to be an ARC reader for this phenomenal book. It beautifully explores the lonely and often frustrating journey couples face while walking through infertility. As someone who has personally experienced this same path, I can say that Deb Brown did an amazing job capturing the emotions, struggles, and raw reality couples endure in similar situations.

I highly recommend this book if you’re looking for a Christ-centered novel that follows a journey both heartbreaking and hopeful. There were moments I had to pause and reflect on my own experience—the toll infertility can take on marriage, work, and even one’s faith in God. This story reminded me that even in the midst of tears and pain, there is still hope, and God still has a plan.

Amazing job, Deb Brown!

[Holly Abraham · Rating 5 out of 5]

To Have and to Hold by Deb L. Brown is one of the most honest and faith-filled books I’ve read about infertility and adoption. The author takes us on a journey of vulnerability and grace, inviting readers into the real emotions of failure, disappointment, heartbreak, and ultimately, surrender.

She beautifully shows that adoption isn’t a “second choice” but a sacred path shaped by God’s love. Amelia and Melvin's faith shines through, reminding us that even in despair, God is faithful and His timing is perfect. This book is tender, uplifting, and full of hope—a must-read for anyone walking through trials or learning to trust God’s plan.

[Sharron · Rating 4 out of 5]

When the miracle doesn't come, can faith survive the silence? This deeply moving novel explores the emotional landscape of a woman grappling with infertility and a wavering sense of faith. The author captures the raw vulnerability of longing for a child, for spiritual clarity, and for independence. With honest, unflinching prose, the story lays bare the silent grief of infertility and the complex dynamics within a marriage. The protagonist’s journey toward self-acceptance and spiritual reckoning is both heartbreaking and empowering. A must-read for anyone who has wrestled with unseen battles and the weight of expectations.

[Jen Sinclair · Rating 5 out of 5]

Deb Brown leads readers through the emotionally turbulent world of pregnancy loss and infertility struggles with empathy and grace. Her writing is beautiful and captivating, and the story grabs you from the start. The characters are realistic, their reactions authentic as they experience the highs and tragic lows of their journey toward fulfilling their dreams of becoming parents. I felt invested in Amelia's struggles as if she were my best friend. I wanted to hug her at least a dozen times throughout the story—a testament to Deb Brown's strength as an emotional storyteller. This is a beautiful book about perseverance, faith, love, and hope. I'm excited to read more from this author!

[Heather Dodge Martin · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this sensitive portrayal of a couple’s journey towards building a family, through difficult times. The story has strong Christian themes, but it’s not necessary to share the faith to appreciate the finely drawn characters and evocative language. Amelia and her husband Melvin’s struggle to remain connected to each other and to their family and friends while enduring fertility treatment, infant loss, and the vagaries of the adoption system felt emotionally real and nuanced. I’ll be looking forward to the next books in the author’s Dearly Beloved series.

[Sharon Hughson · Rating 4 out of 5]

An emotional journey through infertility and adoption. Having known people who traversed both, I attest that this book accurately depicts the emotions and possible outcomes for a person struggling to conceive.
I appreciated the faith journey Amelia took more than any other aspect of this story. She learned that emotions could swallow everything, but God would send a lifeboat in many different forms to keep her faith afloat, even when it was weak or questioning.

[Wendy Haller · Rating 5 out of 5]

I had the opportunity to receive a copy of this beautiful story as an ARC reader. All Amelia and Melvin want is a family of their own. When mother nature, modern medicine, and the adoption system fails them their faith in God is tested.

Instead of asking ‘why?’ they learn to ask ‘what’s next?’. With the support of family, friends, and community they learn that there is a path for them even if it’s not the one they planned. Written from a place of love and compassion, this book beautifully describes the journey of infertility and the heartache and joy it takes to have faith.