The Lone Pilgrim

by Laurie Colwin

A collection of stories about love and privacy that are serious, funny, tender, and alive with elegance and spirit.

Genres: Short Stories, Fiction, Literary Fiction, Classics, Romance, Anthologies, Domestic Fiction

224 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1981

About the author

Laurie Colwin is the author of five novels: Happy All the Time, Family Happiness, Goodbye Without Leaving, Shine On, Bright and Dangerous Object, and A Big Storm Knocked It Over; three collections of short stories: Passion and Affect, Another Marvelous Thing, and The Lone Pilgrim; and two collections of essays: Home Cooking and More Home Cooking. She died in 1992.

Reviews

[emma · Rating 4 out of 5]

welcome to my becoming-a-genius project, part 30...point one, or something.

i am a short-story-a-day enjoyer, so i created this project, in which i read the collected works of various authors at a once daily pace, both to indulge in that habit and to become the smartest person who ever lived, presumably.

i love laurie colwin but have not yet picked up her short story collections. what better way to do it than this?

other than the fact that i'm terrified of running out of colwin material to read. well. here we go!

read previous projects here


DAY ONE: THE LONE PILGRIM
calling all yearners, hopeless romantics, domesticity lovers, coveters of things, eavesdroppers on the lives others are living...this one is for us.
rating: 5


DAY TWO: THE BOYISH LOVER
i love laurie colwin's perfect charming female protagonists with their perfect charming lives of little jams and decorative plates and coziness, and reading one kick an unappreciative man to the curb was very satisfying.
rating: 4


DAY THREE: SENTIMENTAL MEMORY
this story is very bogged down in the concept of having to marry everyone you've ever hooked up with, which has not been my lived experience. but i enjoyed the immersion.
rating: 3.5


DAY FOUR: A GIRL SKATING
this is about being the child-muse of a famous campus poet. not exactly a universal milestone but i'm sure colwin nailed it.
rating: 3.5


DAY FIVE: AN OLD-FASHIONED STORY
i read this while the original miracle on 34th street played in the background and now i'm quite convinced old fashioned stories are the very best kind.
rating: 4


DAY SIX: INTIMACY
sometimes i realize laurie colwin lived in a very different world than mine. but she manages to sway me sometimes.
rating: 3.5


DAY SEVEN: TRAVEL
there are so many kinds of people in the world. it's nice to read about two of the weird ones finding each other.
rating: 3.5


DAY EIGHT: DELIA'S FATHER
an abjectly terrifying coming of age experience, but it's laurie colwin so it also included a lot of little details about cozy french homes.
rating: 4


DAY NINE: A MYTHOLOGICAL SUBJECT
laurie colwin might be the only author to ever exist who can write about people cheating and make me feel anything other than blech.
rating: 4.5


DAY TEN: SAINT ANTHONY OF THE DESERT
it's kind of reassuring that f*ckboys have existed through time.
rating: 4


DAY ELEVEN: THE SMILE BENEATH THE SMILE
back to back on the same topic.
rating: 3.5


DAY TWELVE: THE ACHIEVE OF, THE MASTERY OF THE THING
now this one is about being a stoner. just in case you were getting too comfortable.
rating: 3


DAY THIRTEEN: FAMILY HAPPINESS
a shorter version of the full novel of the same name, but it doesn't really lose much by being much more concise. in fact i think it gains.
rating: 4


OVERALL
every day i was excited to pick this up and had trouble putting it down. laurie colwin, nobody writes like you.
rating: 4

[Julie G · Rating 4 out of 5]

I am melancholic writing this reading response today, knowing this is the last of Laurie Colwin's fiction for me to review.

I feel, right now, like a person who had the most delightful, refreshing drink in her hand on a hot summer day, but who drank it down too fast. It's like I've startled myself by my own gluttony, and I'm surprised to look down and see the empty glass, ice cubes rattling loudly at the bottom, marking the end of my pleasure.

I “met” Laurie Colwin 30 years after her passing, and in less than one year, I've read all of her fiction. (I've never been particularly good about “restraining” myself when I discover a new favorite author).

Laurie Colwin was never a Toni Morrison or a Margaret Atwood, as a writer, but her work has impacted me more than almost any other's. I feel, somehow, that Ms. Colwin and I viewed the world in the same way. I've even been told, by a handful of people, that I physically resemble her.



It's crazy, these connections we can make with people we'll never know. I don't even know the sound of her voice, but, I feel like if I ever get to hear it in a recording (I'm on a waiting list for one), I'll know it as I know my own.

This collection of 13 short stories (odd choice, to pick 13, as most writers pick 9 or 12), is not where I'd advise a newcomer to start with her work.

They are delightful and well-written, but somewhat too short and fleeting. If you're looking for more meat on the bone, I'd send you over, instead, to discover Family Happiness, Happy All the Time or Another Marvelous Thing.

I am completely and utterly FASCINATED with how often this happily married author wrote about happily married people and their infidelities. It makes me almost delirious with curiosity: WHY?

Was she, herself, less contented with her own marriage, or did she simply see the subject of infidelity as a vehicle for poking around at human psychology?

Either way, I find it riveting. Regardless of how many times she picks up the stone to see the little buggers squirming, uncomfortably, in the sunlight, the new variables in human behavior she unearths never fail to interest the reader.

You could start here; it wouldn't be the worst thing that ever happened to you, but if you start where I advised above, you might close with this one and find yourself rattling your own dry ice cubes, too.

Actual deprivation and the feeling of deprivation were one and the same.

[Jeanette (Ms. Feisty) · Rating 5 out of 5]

As soon as I finished this collection I wanted to go right back to the beginning and read it all over again. So I did. That's about the best endorsement I can think of for any book. Every one of the stories has something to offer in terms of humor and understated insight into human relationships. If you've ever known any potheads, you absolutely must read "The Achieve of, the Mastery of the Thing." It's the most perfect representation you'll ever find of the happy, harmless, dedicated dope smoker.

Laurie Colwin was an extraordinary, unpretentious, original voice who was taken from us far too soon. Her work slips into obscurity while contemporary authors who write rubbish are handed the Pulitzer Prize. Could just 'bout break your heart if you let it.


Second reading completed May 24, 2011

[Katie H. · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've been depressed since Laurie Colwin died tragically young. I discovered her when I came across Goodbye Without Leaving in an airport God knows where and from then on I couldn't get enough of her work. There's something about her voice. Hard to define but she writes about what it's like to be single and it felt more than familiar.

Laurie gave shape to the ordinary, to people you might glance at in passing but whose lives have tremendous meaning and challenges you will never be aware of. Reading her work I felt that she understood a wide variety of people and empathized with each one. She's written novels and collections of short stories; they all have a similar tone but this one holds up over the years as my all-time favorite book about being youthful, restless and alone.

[Richard · Rating 5 out of 5]

Two important things: (1) I buddy-read this with Kubi with whom I shared frantic voice messages every time I finished a story; she finished the book more than a week before I did, and I was grateful she responded to my late night/early morning messages with as much gusto as I had (2) This is my first Colwin. And what a treat. Maybe it's the recent rerelease of her books that caused the resurgence of interest in her, but damn, what took us so long? We all need this. We need to be infected by her unmistakable wisdom, her incredible empathy, the beauty she finds in horrible situations, the joy she leaves in every full stop. Our domestic lives are complicated, and they are rightly told here. Cheating? It can be a woman's release from misery. Cheating? It can be a woman's choice to keep her sanity. Cheating? It can be what a man thinks his wife is doing but she's just high. In Colwin's stories women are allowed to be happy and women are happy. I wish I had the time to write here sensibly how I felt with each story, but alas, that tradition is gone. But for now I found a writer whose every work I will seek and devour and relish again and again.

Faves: "Sentimental Memory," "A Girl Skating," An Old-Fashioned Story," "A Mythological Subject," "The Achieve of, The Mastery of the Thing," "Family Happiness"

[Kubi]

Contains two of my favorite Colwin stories so far - "An Old-Fashioned Story" and "A Mythological Subject." Overall, utter delight, filled with examples of how life could be happy while still riddled with conflict, either as a result of external forces or, more commonly, our own internal battles.

[Kit · Rating 4 out of 5]

Laurie Colwin was one of my early sources of information about how the adult world worked. As soon as you pick up one of her books it's obvious that she's someone who knows things. I started reading her books about the same time she started writing them and I read everything she wrote. Re-reading The Lone Pilgrim recently was bittersweet. It reminded me of how simply and perfectly she wrote and it made me sad all over again that she died early. She'd be the perfect person to help me make sense of the rest of life.

[Pattie O'Donnell · Rating 5 out of 5]

"Once upon a time, I was Professor Thorne Speizer's stoned wife..." Another classic first line, from one of the stories in Laurie Colwin's little jewelbox of short stories. About young people beginning to live on their own, I read it and loved it when I was young myself. Funny and sweet without being saccharine.

[Annie · Rating 5 out of 5]

SORT OF MAD THAT I SLEPT ON LAURIE COLWIN FOR SO LONG

[David · Rating 5 out of 5]

It must take real skill to write a collection of love stories which (mostly) end happily and for them not to be overly sentimental or cloying, but Laurie Colwin makes it look effortless in these astute, intelligent and exquisitely written tales. Despite the 1970s New York and Boston settings, Colwin has (as I think has been noted before) much in common with Jane Austen, including her generosity of spirit and her wit, though Austen of course never wrote any hilarious stories about potheads! Anyway, on the basis of this book Colwin goes straight on to my select but ever-growing list of authors by whom I Must Read Everything (which sadly isn't that much - five novels and three collections - due to her untimely death in 1992).

[JoAnn/QuAppelle Kirk · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have no idea how I missed this wonderful book of stories by an author whom I adore. In fact, I missed all three of her books of stories. The other two are on their way to me in the mail. I am sure I will devour them just as I devoured this one!

Colwin takes ordinary people and turns their stories into such interesting pieces. Her stories are all complete, and left me satisfied, the mark of a good short story writer.

[Amelia · Rating 5 out of 5]

"The Achieve of, the Mastery of the Thing", is the best stoner housewife, faculty spouse short story ever.

[AJ Nolan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Every once in a while I read a book and think: "How have I never read this author?!" Laurie Colwin is one such author. Just as when I read Edith Pearlman's Binocular Vision, when I read the Lone Pilgrim, I instantly knew I was in the hands of a master, and just sat back and marveled at what she wrote. Every story is a love story, a heterosexual love story, often between people of the upper-class, and so these were not stories that screamed out to me as relate-able, but I loved every single one of them, because in each story, Colwin gets to the heart of what it is to be human. Every female protagonist is fully realized and fully human. Each woman has an occupation and interests beyond her love interests, which may not seem like such a big thing now (although by the sheer number of movies that fail the Bechdel test, having a fully realized female character still is a rarity), but when this was written in 1981, having all her female protagonists be fully independent, career driven and yet also sexual, was still a somewhat revolutionary act. The revolutionary nature of it is evident in the New York Times review of it, with Joyce Carol Oates saying in a condescending way that:

"'The Lone Pilgrim'' cannot be recommended to those whose hearts have been pierced by the cynical notion that stereotypical ''romantic'' situations are not viable as art, or who expect from a writer a great deal more, by way of characterization, than ebullient catalogues of hairstyles, clothes, sports, nicknames, hobbies, apartment furnishings and quirks of diet. Yet Miss Colwin writes with such sunny skill, and such tireless enthusiasm, that her overmined subject matter becomes insignificant"

and then finishes up with the estimation that:

"and at least one story, ''A Girl Skating,'' which touches upon issues rather more weighty than romance, is very good indeed. ''The Lone Pilgrim'' will not nudge Doris Lessing's short fiction off the shelf - but then it is not intended to do so." http://www.nytimes.com/1981/01/25/boo...

While I love Joyce Carol Oates' writing, what she missed in her review was that weight exists not just in the obviously serious subjects like covered in "A Girl Skating," where violence and perversion lurks, just as it does in most of Oates' own writing, but that life itself is worthy of capturing and conveying on the page, and our lives are made up of things like our apartment furnishings, and what we eat and what we wear. While violence can be a useful tool for uncovering our real selves, it takes a certain subtle skill to strip a character down to their core when all they are doing is seeking to deal with the effects of having fallen in love. I also doubt that Joyce Carol Oates would have patronized Steinbeck or Hemingway for demonstrating a "sunny skill" in how they write about the inhabitants of Cannery Row, or what their protagonist wore and drank while watching the bull fights. Characters are created out of details, and Laurie Colwin creates a gorgeous array of characters, each one distinct despite their many similarities.

This is a book I will have to read several times to understand how she accomplishes what she does. This first read was for all pleasure, and I was too caught up in it to jot too many notes, or write down too many quotes. I did do a bit more observing of still on the title story, however, since this was, in essence, my second reading of it having just heard it on the podcast. The story begins with meditations of how the narrator is the perfect house guest, and the work of imagination that the narrator engages in, imagining the various houses as her own. This opening seems like a long period of exposition before the inciting incident occurs, covering five pages before the introduction of Gilbert Seigh, but it establishes her character in a way that cannot be short-changed. We understand her as a serious, imaginative person who has created a life she loved. She is thus a woman of substance before falling in love with Seigh. Likewise, due to this foundation, we thus also understand the seriousness of her previous love affair, because we got to know the narrator first on her own, and only later do we see how she is with her various loves. The story's big reversal hinges on a very human tendency, of how disconcerting it can be when you get that for which you have longed. As the narrator writes, "Woe to those who get what they desire. Fulfillment leaves an empty space where your old self used to be, the self that pines and broods and reflects." (15) She thus places her character on the brink of a major life decision, a decision of love, and she resolves this crisis action in a wholly satisfying way.

I recommend this book to anyone and everyone who loves to read a good story. Who likes both happy and sad endings. Who wants to get a window into what it is to be human. I, for one, will be looking up Colwin's other two collections very soon.

[Catherine Goodrich · Rating 5 out of 5]

a book about aspiring Sweetie Pies for aspiring Sweetie Pies— great vignettes on the value of companionship, the value of privacy, the value of hobbies, the value of laying around

[Christopher · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Lone Pilgrim contains a series of short stories about women in their twenties and thirties navigating relationships, marriage, love and sometimes adultery. The view is often at a distance as if the narrator was looking at a younger self through a slightly distorted mirror. Often poignant and wry, she deftly skewers the men who have passed through her fictional life. But Colwin is not without compassion to mix with her perspective. It is survivor's clear vision which permits her to record a lover's ending response after a painful surprise break up to the effect of: "you will get over it." Not always.

[Lesli · Rating 5 out of 5]

All of Colwin's books, several each of short stories and novels, are wonderful and I can't recommend them highly enough. I actually bought many of her books in hardcover, something rare for me! They are all about life and love in Manhattan. She has been described as having "very acute sensibilities," whatever those are and has also been compared to Jane Austen. Her first novel is Happy All the Time, which is about two couples who are related and are friends. My favorite book of short stories is The Lone Pilgrim; my favorite novel is Family Happiness, which resulted from a short story in The Lone Pilgrim. Many stories were published in The New Yorker and she wrote for Gourmet and published 2 books of her articles on food that originally appeared in Gourmet, entitled Home Cooking and More Home Cooking. She died in mid-'92. If you search under her name on the web, you can still find odes to her writing. I have all her books and do re-read them. Her books are a delight to read.

[Tricia · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent collection of short stories on a common theme: intelligent people navigating adult relationships and responsibilities. Sounds mundane, but Colwin has a gift of nailing external and internal dialogue.

My favorite of the bunch is "Saint Anthony of the Desert."
The opening line: "Haphazardness, as a condition of life, has its usefulness but is of fixed duration."

"My education was as hapless as my finances. As I conducted it, it suited me for nothing. I had been a cheerful student with a short but intense attention span, waiting for some subject to commit itself to me. Since none did, I floated from course to course and ended up unhirable.
No one seemed to have a job for someone whose qualifications included a love of American poetry, an imperfect understanding of astronomy, and a fascination with but by no means a firm grasp of the principles of cultural anthropology."

[Jules · Rating 5 out of 5]

Luminously written, with wisdom and humor coming from every page, often in lovely turn of phrase. Not every story hit me so perfectly but most were like little gems you could hold up to the light, that sparkle with different colors as you look from a slightly different angle. A couple of favorite lines, though there were so many:

"We domestic sensualists live in a state of longing, no matter how comfortable our own places are." (Predating and predicting the era of Nancy Meyers-style movies, IMO.)

"Woe to those who get what they desire. Fulfillment leaves an empty space where your old self used to be, the self that pines and broods and reflects. You furnish a dream house in your imagination, but how startling and final when that dream house is your own address."

I can't wait to read more of hers.

[Joanna · Rating 4 out of 5]

I came to this one through my work and was pleasantly surprised by how much I enjoyed it. The stories are distinct and defined, and yet they bleed into one another thematically and tonally, but in a not-unpleasant way. I don't know that I'd have picked this up on my own, but I'm glad I had the opportunity to read it, and I still find myself thinking about bits and pieces of the various stories still, more than a week after finishing the collection.

[Thomas · Rating 4 out of 5]

These are beautifully written short stories, though mostly lacking in plot - most of them are languid character sketches of intelligent New England women giving themselves permission to fall in love. You can imagine the reality show equivalent would be the opposite of "Real Housewives" - how about "Lifestyles of the Bored and Brilliant"? I'm gonna pitch that!

[Jennah · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great collection of short stories. My favorites were “The Lone Pilgrim” and “An Old-Fashioned Story”.

“Woe to those who get what they desire. Fulfillment leaves an empty space where your old self used to be, the self that pines and broods and reflects. You furnish a dream house in your imagination, but how startling and final when that dream house is your own address. What is left to you?”

[Lauren Rochford · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm gonna go out on a limb and say this story collection is perfect. Every sentence is a dream! I borrowed it from the library but plan to buy my own copy so I can read it whenever I want. Laurie Colwin's writing just makes me so happy.

[Elizabeth Ramstad · Rating 5 out of 5]

my very favorite author--loved it and her

[Linda S. Sabatka-Crappe · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked a few stories, loved a couple & was indifferent to many.

[Tristin McCreight · Rating 4 out of 5]

A quick read definitely a nice break from what I’ve read some short stories I loved a lot and will take while others just weren’t my favs.

[Maja · Rating 3 out of 5]

ya i definitely just don’t like short stories

[ynna · Rating 5 out of 5]

Not Laurie Colwin proving that I can love a short story collection

[Zitrolena · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.3 Laurie Colwin just has this special way of writing, one which I can't really put my finger on. It makes me feel homey, shows the beauty in life, sorrow and confusion. It's very weird how calm every single one of her story is and how nothing actually happens but it still feels so dear to me

[Luke · Rating 4 out of 5]

Normally I get annoyed with books that focus too heavily on romantic relationships, especially (and I realize it makes me sound like an uncultivated brute to admit this) when they're written by women and from the perspective of women. So here is a collection of short stories, each with a female protagonist and every last one of which is a sort of meditation on love. But Colwin, whose writing I'd never read before, kept me hooked through 13 stories (hardly a clunker in the bunch) that are filled with tenderness and humor and wisdom. They're about romantic love, yes (and as cohesive and compelling an exploration of that theme as I've read), but also the related topics of marriage, fidelity, domesticity, and what it really means to enter the adult world. I breezed through the entire book in a day.

Oh, and truth be told, the only reason I decided to read The Lone Pilgrim to begin with is because I'd heard it includes one of the funniest pot stories ever written. Allow me to pass on that recommendation: Read "The Achieve of, the Mastery of the Thing", one of the last stories in this collection. You won't be disappointed!

[Jules · Rating 4 out of 5]

Typically, I don't like books of short stories. I did enjoy The Lone Pilgrim though, perhaps because the stories had several common themes, ie: New York City, falling in love, Love, Academic environments, which created a thread of similarity between the variety of characters and situations in the different stories. I'm not sure why the book is called the Lone Pilgrim for in all the stories the main character(s) end up in some kind of relationship and thus are not really alone. That being said this is not a book for those coming out of a relationship or dealing with infidelity. Only read this if you are in a good place regarding love and it's consequences!