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Published December 14, 2025
To preface my review, I have to be honest: part of what happened between this book and me happened because I did not check what it was. And what it is is a self-published book. I don't do self-published books. Not that I'm a snob but I've been burnt a couple of times by absolute garbage. Self-published books seldom go through a professional editing process and it often shows. Grammar is patchy, spelling mistakes are killing any immersion, story beats and plot points make no sense, etc. I should have made sure what this book was and I didn't. That's on me.
That being said, I didn't like this novel at all. I'll try to keep my tone neutral throughout this review because bashing a person's work is unkind and constructive criticism is always more useful. But boy, am I pissed off at this book.
Right off the bat, I found the writing strangely flat and methodical. He does that, then that, then they blush because they feel that way. And then that happens.. While it is not a problem in and of itself and can be used successfully to convey emotional blunting, for example, it's clearly not the intent here. It makes it hard to connect with a cast of characters who are already hard to empathize with, being for the most part one dimensional and absolute sociopaths. Honourable mention to Hannah, the bully with anger issues, who apparently has the privilege of starring in a spin-off novel all by herself, and who was so grating that I'd rather eat my e-reader than spend another minute with her. None of the characters show any earned personality change during the course of the book. The protagonist suffers from some form of trauma and grief and then he doesn't anymore but we're not sure why. He's not very assertive nor courageous, and stays this way the whole novel until it changes, just because. Billy is a magical Australian First Nations guy, and that's it, mate. Steven is the butt-monkey, and so on.
Another big issue is the author either writing about things he knows almost nothing about or vulgarizing them to the point of unrecognizability. This is quite jarring when the protagonist is supposed to be an MD and a genius genetic tinkerer and uses a mix of techno-babble and straight-up wrong biochemistry terminology to talk about his work (and is berated by the aforementioned bully for being a nerd and verbose).
Chromosome DNA strands on planet Earth are connected by a hydrogen molecule while 2:b chromosome is bonded only through covalent bonds.
Not from the protagonist but I loved this one too:
The word scientific comes from the Latin phrase Scie enti fic. That is Latin for 'know that it is fiction'
In the same vein, there's a French or Québécois crew member aboard the protagonist's ship who speaks broken French. It's OK, not everyone is expected to speak French. But if you don't, maybe stay away from French characters or at least don't make them talk like a bad Maurice Chevalier impersonator, hon hon?
There is a feeling of pulpiness throughout the book. Again, not necessarily a bad thing but in this particular case, it feels unintended or mismanaged. The story progresses lightning fast, the names of the non-human characters are hilariously corny (big up to my homies Brennoan and Greeham), the women are beautiful and very Earthling-friendly (the guys too, to be fair), there is a manly-man diplomat/fighter/spiritual leader who solves everything (surprisingly, he's not the protagonist) and it ends with a deus ex machina and a big curb-stomp battle. It could have been a fun romp if only it had taken itself less seriously. But, to be clear, it's not, because it's not.
Story-wise, it's a mixed bag of genres, none of them particularly well executed. There is Sci-Fi but it's very light. This is supposed to be a First Contact story, but not really. There's a bit of Fantasy without any fantastical elements. There's Romance but it's lukewarm and love-at-first-sight uninteresting. The book is not that long but I couldn't wait for it to finish. I also felt a disturbing undercurrent of New Age philosophy and anti-science running throughout the story that rubbed me the wrong way. And then, there's the ending twist. I don't really know what to think about it. Let's just say, it would have been interesting to reveal it halfway through the story and maybe dwell on the implications? I mean, The author doesn't care.
The elephant in the room now: this is the worst kind of self-published book, a novel which has been subjected to almost no editing process. In no particular order, it suffers from:
- Repetitions. The word "hall" is reused 4 times in one page during a lengthy description.
- Past tense popping up at random in a present-tense paragraph.
- Information repeated within the same chapter or changing during the course of the story. The biggest moon around the planet is either 150% the size of Earth's moon or triple its size, not both. "Oant" is the word for no. Or it could be "Deeaat", who knows?
- Situations making no sense in context. Our lovable gang of sociopaths running low on food but not on coffee, for instance.
- Items appearing when needed, regardless of how credible the characters having them is.
- Items disappearing when convenient. I can't count the number of times the big bad could have been sniped from afar, if only the characters remembered they had modern weapons.
- The author killed none of his darlings. He loves making up languages and thus we have a lot of dialogue consisting only of undecipherable extraterrestrial dialects, which is useless to us, the reader. He's also enamored with people saying "do I know you?" or "who's this guy?" when another character acts out of keeping with their usual demeanor. It could be a funny catchphrase but it's used by all characters so it becomes a tic.
- I'm usually not bothered by that kind of issue but the text is peppered with some violent viewpoint shifts that end up being distracting.
- Some dialogues are full of non sequitur. At first, I thought it was hinting at some sort of quirk in the way the extraterrestrials were thinking. Now I'm quite sure it's a flaw in the author's skill at writing dialogue.
- Grammar and spelling errors. Way too many of them.
The issue, of course, is not that the author made these mistakes. The issue is that an editor would have caught them, and would have asked for corrections.
While nobody forced me to buy this novel, I still feel cheated by the reviews. I *can't* believe more than 2,500 people gave this book 5 stars. I just can't. Anne Robillard, a Quebec writer who writes, let's say, novels of controversial quality and self-publishes, has a very loyal fanbase. Not only has the first volume of her best-known series the same number of ratings on Goodreads than this one, but it couldn't achieve the feat that this book achieved, namely having a vast majority of 4 and 5-stars ratings. Where are this book's disgruntled readers?
Well, I'm here, and that was my review of Eden 2:b