What do you think?
Rate this book
Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody #1
Fortællinger om en ubetydelig øgle
Det er ikke let at være gangvagt i en skole fuld af larmende dyr! Særligt når man ovenikøbet er en kolonorm øgle. Så stikker man ret meget ud. Zeke vil egentligt helst være usynlig, men det tillader skolens bølle og wannabe superskurk, pelikanen Pelicarnassus, bestemt ikke.
Kan Zeke og hans venner redde deres skole - og måske hele verden - fra at blive destrueret af en gigantisk pelikanrobot?
Kan Zeke og hans venner redde deres skole - og måske hele verden - fra at blive destrueret af en gigantisk pelikanrobot?
200 pages, Hardcover
First published September 3, 2024
45 people are currently reading
3678 people want to read
About the author
Patrick Ness
57 books18.7k followersPatrick Ness, an award-winning novelist, has written for Radio 4 and The Sunday Telegraph and is a literary critic for The Guardian. He has written many books, including the Chaos Walking Trilogy, The Crash of Hennington, Topics About Which I Know Nothing, and A Monster Calls.
He has won numerous awards, including the Guardian Children’s Fiction Prize, the Booktrust Teenage Prize, and the Costa Children’s Book Award. Born in Virginia, he currently lives in London.
He has won numerous awards, including the Guardian Children’s Fiction Prize, the Booktrust Teenage Prize, and the Costa Children’s Book Award. Born in Virginia, he currently lives in London.
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 134 reviews
December 26, 2024
کتاب رو به خاطر اسم بامزهش و نویسندهش، پاتریک نِس خوندم که یکی از قویترین مجموعههایی که تا به حال خوندم رو نوشته. اما راستش رو بگم؟ این شدت از تفکرات
Woke
به صورت فشاری در کتابهای کودک داره حالم رو به هم میزنه. آره باید از افسردگی صحبت کرد، از معلولیت هم همینطور، قلدری مشکل بزرگی در بعضی کشورهاست، تبعیض هم که مشکل جهانیه، راجع به الجیبیتیکیو هم که دیگه نگم. اما واقعاً لازمه همش رو بریزید تو یک کتاب؟ آیا مجبوریم این آشِ داستانی رو بخونیم چون شما نویسندهی عزیز میخوای به اندازهی کافی مترقی باشی؟ پس ارزش خود داستان چی؟
حیف این ایدهی داستانی جالب راجع به یک مدرسهی حیوانات با مارمولکی که کشور فرانسه رو زانوشه نبود؟ من نمیگم کتاب باید خالی از این مسائل باشه. اما این روزها اینجوریه که انگار نویسنده این مسائل رو روی کاغذ میچینه و از بالا نگاه میکنه و میگه چطوری این نقطهها رو به زور با یک داستان به هم وصل کنم؟ این یعنی فدا کردن ماجرا. در صورتی که یک داستان خوب شاید خودش از یکی از این نقطهها عبور کنه و اتفاقاً اون موقعست که اثرگذار میشه. البته این مشکلیه که این روزها مختص ادبیات کودک نیست و به طور کلی هرجا بحث داستان مطرحه وجود داره (نتفیلیکس!!)
خلاصه که حیف قلم پاتریک نِس و حیف این ایده
۱۴۰۳/۱۰/۵
Woke
به صورت فشاری در کتابهای کودک داره حالم رو به هم میزنه. آره باید از افسردگی صحبت کرد، از معلولیت هم همینطور، قلدری مشکل بزرگی در بعضی کشورهاست، تبعیض هم که مشکل جهانیه، راجع به الجیبیتیکیو هم که دیگه نگم. اما واقعاً لازمه همش رو بریزید تو یک کتاب؟ آیا مجبوریم این آشِ داستانی رو بخونیم چون شما نویسندهی عزیز میخوای به اندازهی کافی مترقی باشی؟ پس ارزش خود داستان چی؟
حیف این ایدهی داستانی جالب راجع به یک مدرسهی حیوانات با مارمولکی که کشور فرانسه رو زانوشه نبود؟ من نمیگم کتاب باید خالی از این مسائل باشه. اما این روزها اینجوریه که انگار نویسنده این مسائل رو روی کاغذ میچینه و از بالا نگاه میکنه و میگه چطوری این نقطهها رو به زور با یک داستان به هم وصل کنم؟ این یعنی فدا کردن ماجرا. در صورتی که یک داستان خوب شاید خودش از یکی از این نقطهها عبور کنه و اتفاقاً اون موقعست که اثرگذار میشه. البته این مشکلیه که این روزها مختص ادبیات کودک نیست و به طور کلی هرجا بحث داستان مطرحه وجود داره (نتفیلیکس!!)
خلاصه که حیف قلم پاتریک نِس و حیف این ایده
۱۴۰۳/۱۰/۵
July 27, 2024
“’I’m making you both Hall Monitors,’ Principal Wombat said, though she quickly added, ‘This isn’t because you’re monitor lizards.’”
From award-winning novelist Patrick Ness, a school story aimed at nine-year-olds that will just as easily appeal to sixty-nine-year-olds, enhanced by illustrations in Tim Miller’s individual style. Anyone who isn’t laughing out loud on the first page has no fun in them. But anyone with a heart will also be choking up during certain bits of Zeke’s story. And Ness gives us all important things to consider, stuff that many school kids have to face daily: bullying, violence and intimidation, fat-shaming, insensitivity to disabilities, mental health issues, and being type-cast. But he does it with humour: there are laughs on nearly every page.
There’s a quirky cast that includes monitor lizards, one of whom has France on his knee, a wombat school principal, a wildebeest teacher, a pony, some egrets, a hawk in sunglasses, and a nasty pelican with supervillain ambitions. Ness gives his protagonist some loyal and brave friends, who spout wise words and offer sound advice, which is needed, because there’s a battle to win if the school is to be saved from destruction. The start of a series? Yes, please! Hugely imaginative and very funny.
This unbiased review is from an uncorrected proof copy provided by Better Reading Preview and Walker Books Australia.
From award-winning novelist Patrick Ness, a school story aimed at nine-year-olds that will just as easily appeal to sixty-nine-year-olds, enhanced by illustrations in Tim Miller’s individual style. Anyone who isn’t laughing out loud on the first page has no fun in them. But anyone with a heart will also be choking up during certain bits of Zeke’s story. And Ness gives us all important things to consider, stuff that many school kids have to face daily: bullying, violence and intimidation, fat-shaming, insensitivity to disabilities, mental health issues, and being type-cast. But he does it with humour: there are laughs on nearly every page.
There’s a quirky cast that includes monitor lizards, one of whom has France on his knee, a wombat school principal, a wildebeest teacher, a pony, some egrets, a hawk in sunglasses, and a nasty pelican with supervillain ambitions. Ness gives his protagonist some loyal and brave friends, who spout wise words and offer sound advice, which is needed, because there’s a battle to win if the school is to be saved from destruction. The start of a series? Yes, please! Hugely imaginative and very funny.
This unbiased review is from an uncorrected proof copy provided by Better Reading Preview and Walker Books Australia.
September 21, 2024
“’I’m making you both Hall Monitors,’ Principal Wombat said, though she quickly added, ‘This isn’t because you’re monitor lizards.’”
From award-winning novelist Patrick Ness, a school story aimed at nine-year-olds that will just as easily appeal to sixty-nine-year-olds, narrated in audio by Robert G. Slade, whose rendition has to make up for missing out on the illustrations in Tim Miller’s individual style. Anyone who isn’t laughing out loud on the first page has no fun in them. But anyone with a heart will also be choking up during certain bits of Zeke’s story. And Ness gives us all important things to consider, stuff that many school kids have to face daily: bullying, violence and intimidation, fat-shaming, insensitivity to disabilities, mental health issues, and being type-cast. But he does it with humour: there are laughs on nearly every page.
There’s a quirky cast that includes monitor lizards, one of whom has France on his knee, a wombat school principal, a wildebeest teacher, a pony, some egrets, a hawk in sunglasses, and a nasty pelican with supervillain ambitions. Ness gives his protagonist some loyal and brave friends, who spout wise words and offer sound advice, which is needed, because there’s a battle to win if the school is to be saved from destruction. The start of a series? Yes, please! Hugely imaginative and very funny.
From award-winning novelist Patrick Ness, a school story aimed at nine-year-olds that will just as easily appeal to sixty-nine-year-olds, narrated in audio by Robert G. Slade, whose rendition has to make up for missing out on the illustrations in Tim Miller’s individual style. Anyone who isn’t laughing out loud on the first page has no fun in them. But anyone with a heart will also be choking up during certain bits of Zeke’s story. And Ness gives us all important things to consider, stuff that many school kids have to face daily: bullying, violence and intimidation, fat-shaming, insensitivity to disabilities, mental health issues, and being type-cast. But he does it with humour: there are laughs on nearly every page.
There’s a quirky cast that includes monitor lizards, one of whom has France on his knee, a wombat school principal, a wildebeest teacher, a pony, some egrets, a hawk in sunglasses, and a nasty pelican with supervillain ambitions. Ness gives his protagonist some loyal and brave friends, who spout wise words and offer sound advice, which is needed, because there’s a battle to win if the school is to be saved from destruction. The start of a series? Yes, please! Hugely imaginative and very funny.
January 15, 2026
1 Sentence Summary: When Principal Wombat makes Zeke, Daniel, and Alicia hall monitors—not because they’re monitor lizards!—Zeke gets on the wrong side of the school bully, Pelicarnassus, and must discover the strength he didn’t know he had.
My Thoughts: This was so clever and funny yet also so sad and heartwarming at the same time. It was such a great middle grade novel: the story was engaging, the characters were fun and relatable, and the pictures were awesome.
The book is for kids, but it is very enjoyable for adults too. Patrick Ness explores some important and difficult topics like bullying, having a challenging home life, and parents struggling with depression. You can really understand and root for the characters. We see the importance of friendship, community, understanding those who are different from us, and standing up for our beliefs.
Very well written and a very sweet and smart and wonderful read.
Recommend to: Fans of humorous and heartwarming middle grade novels.
(Warnings: bullying; parental neglect)
My Thoughts: This was so clever and funny yet also so sad and heartwarming at the same time. It was such a great middle grade novel: the story was engaging, the characters were fun and relatable, and the pictures were awesome.
The book is for kids, but it is very enjoyable for adults too. Patrick Ness explores some important and difficult topics like bullying, having a challenging home life, and parents struggling with depression. You can really understand and root for the characters. We see the importance of friendship, community, understanding those who are different from us, and standing up for our beliefs.
Very well written and a very sweet and smart and wonderful read.
Recommend to: Fans of humorous and heartwarming middle grade novels.
(Warnings: bullying; parental neglect)
January 24, 2025
Patrick Ness never fails to amaze me. Every story he creates displays a new Ness-ness. And more often than not, reveals something new in my path and the world around me with his words. It’s been a minute though. Sooo, what’s he been up to? THIS!
The Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody is super silly. It’s an anthropomorphic world with monitor lizards serving as Hall Monitors, wombats as school principals, pelicans as wanna-be super villains, and so much more. I adored the heavy metal loving Pandas! Simply put, the imagination here is DAZZLING.
Let’s start with Zeke, our monitor lizard hero. And yes, Zeke--you are a hero! Zeke has a lot to deal with at home and school. He has his new Hall Monitor duties, bullies, and surprise invasions to tend to. Btw…The whole French knee story is magnifique. At home, Zeke has his Mom. Since the death of Zeke’s Dad, his Mom has been struggling with depression. Which leaves young Zeke facing big, adult issues on his own. Is he alone though? Not if Daniel and Alicia have a say in the matter! These three friends are fiercely funny and supportive. They have each other’s tails no matter what.
“They’d shared an incubator—it was just a white towel under a light bulb—but once you shared an incubator with a lizard, that lizard stayed your friend.”
Sweetness and silliness go hand in hand in Zeke’s story. Along with the huge all-heart messages that are slipped right in between the fun and art. I can’t scuttle away without pointing out the illustrations. They’re a joy! All big eyes filled with emotion and little legs in motion. Plus, the action-packed scenes with fighting, falling, and jet planes attacking. There’s a lot to see and feel in these pages--like messages of friendship and empathy and identity. Come see for yourself.
I loved these lizards at word one. I hope you do too!
p.s. One of my top 5 lines I would love to say in real life popped up in this book. It’s been awhile since I’ve seen one in print. It’s…“I’ve said too much already.” I long to conspiratorially whisper that to someone someday. It’s right up there with “Get behind that rock!” Haha…
Wait. Look. At. That. I think I just stumbled on an opportunity here. It’s not a whisper but it’ll do. Let me end with….
I’ve said too much already. Go read this book!
February 3, 2025
I laughed some—especially about “he had France on his knee”—but ultimately it was pretty pointless and I don’t really have any interest in reading a sequel.
January 6, 2026
Dopisek z roku 2026:
Urokliwa, życzliwa, żartobliwa i niczym mocno bijące serce. Wzruszająca, barwna, szczera i momentami absurdalna, w najlepszym znaczeniu tego słowa. Zaskakująco śmiała i pełna dobrych intencji. Pierwsza część Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody stanowi początek podróży Patricka Nessa wśród krętych ścieżek literatury dziecięcej i nawet po tak długim czasie od mojej pierwszej lektury przynosi ze sobą tylko ciepłe myśli. Autor świetnie splata wątki czysto dziecięce z rzeczami, które absolutnie śniły się kiedyś filozofom, ale obawiali się je wypchnąć na światło dzienne (tak, patrzę na ciebie, Francjo na kolanie). Za pomocą swej wdzięcznej wyobraźni i głębokiego poczucia człowieczeństwa tworzy historię o rzeczach śmiertelnie dla dzieci poważnych i całkowicie dla nich zrozumiałych; a to dlatego, że jako autor traktuje dzieciaki z należytym szacunkiem i rozmawia z nimi jak równy z równym, spoglądając na nie z nadzieją.
Cokolwiek sobie wyśnicie w snach, których nie pamiętacie, Ness pewnie kiedyś wam to odeśle z powrotem. Nie mogę się doczekać trzeciej części przygód o trzech zadziornych jaszczurkach oraz ich uskrzydlonym kumplu, a wy biegnijcie po Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody i dajcie się potraktować z dobrą wiarą.
Oryginalna recenzja:
Gdziekolwiek nie zawędrowałby Patrick Ness w swych próbach literackich, wszędzie przynosi ze sobą powiew świeżości; równocześnie jaśniejąc w samotnych czterech ścianach swych powieści, niezaprzeczalnie. Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody przypomniało mi, jak tęskniłam za taką szczerością w literaturze dziecięcej, trochę słodko-gorzką.
Jaszczurka nie jest nikim, ma imię, Zeke. Jednak poczucie widzialności czasami niesie ze sobą ciężar, zwłaszcza, gdy nie jest się pewnym, jak inni cię dostrzegają ani ile w tym prawdy. A sprawa staje się jeszcze potworniejsza, gdy akurat zauważy cię największy szkolny zbir – pelikański syn największej złoczyńczyni świata.
Nie jestem pewna, czy to kwestia jakiegoś wyjątkowego pociągu autora do dziwacznej strony życia, naginania fikcji do najgłębszych pragnień i wychodzenia poza pudło, czy też naturalnego sposobu postrzegania świata (bo jakże zachwycający byłby ten obraz) Nessa. Wiem jednak, że każda jego powieść, nowelka i opowiadanie zdołało zauroczyć mnie swoimi dziwactwami, urzec postaciami nieprzefiltrowanymi w swoich uczuciach, wytrącić mnie z równowagi, pociągnąć mnie ze sobą bez kompromisu i przyprószyć moją wyobraźnię o rumieniec, uśmiech czy zachwyt. I nie inaczej było z tą malutką powieścią dla dzieci, opowieścią o szkole dla zwierząt, jaszczurce i czarnym psie nawiedzającym jej mamę.
Naprawdę jest to literatura dziecięca, nie musicie postępować po niej ostrożnie, z pewnością możecie podzielić się nią z kochanymi dziećmi. W Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody odnajdziecie szkołę dla zwierząt, bardzo podobną do naszych podstawówek, gdzie każda grupa stworzeń ma określone cechy osobowości i zwyczaje; postacie są dowcipne, słodkie, barwne i w perspektywie dziecięcej czaderskie. Wiąże się z nimi ciekawa refleksja, kto tworzy naszą tożsamość i co wpływa na nasz charakter, ta kwestia może stać się wyjątkowo ważna dla docelowej grupy czytelników (a nawet dla starszych czytelników). Spotkacie się też tutaj z cudownym humorem (znając pozostałe powieści Nessa wiedziałam, że na pewno będzie łapać mnie z zaskoczenia), wspaniałymi zwrotami akcji (było kilka takich scen, które szczególnie osunęły moją szczękę na podłogę, uwielbiam te małe dziwne cudy tego autora) i prawdami dziecięcymi, które nie tracą na wartości z żadnym pokoleniem, wypowiedzianymi bardzo szczerze i z wyrozumiałością. Dzieciaki z pewnością zachwycą pewne sceny akcji (ach, ci superzłoczyńcy pelikany), fantazyjne obrazy i kreacje głównych bohaterów. Jednak największą wartość stanowią oczywiście kwestie poruszane w powieści, takie jak odnajdywanie własnej tożsamości, podejmowanie się odpowiedzialności, radzenie sobie z ciężkimi emocjami, stawanie naprzeciwko problemowi znęcania się w szkole oraz… przechodzenie żałoby po ukochanych osobach oraz bycie obecnym dla tych zmagających się z chorobą. Oprószone są pięknymi, słodko-gorzkimi metaforami; obraz czarnego psa stającego na straży doprowadził mnie do łez, i to wiele razy, a kwestia… kolana głównego bohatera była jednym z najbardziej fantazyjnych i dowcipnych zwrotów akcji, z którymi spotkałam się w tym gatunku. Co tu owijać w bawełnę, buzia otworzyła mi się szeroko i byłam przeszczęśliwa, ogromnie zaskoczona. Ten wątek jest świetnie przeprowadzony. Warto również zwrócić uwagę na to, jak w świecie Patricka Nessa wszyscy są widziani; w powieści pojawiają się postacie z niepełnosprawnością, chorobą oraz bohaterowie ze społeczności LGBTQ+. Jest to przedłużenie tego, o co autor dzielnie walczy w życiu prywatnym i publicznym, oraz piękne przypomnienie dla dziecięcych czytelników, jak my wszyscy nadajemy życiu tak samo wielką wartość. Z pewnością mogą pojawić się głosy, że treści wskazane przeze mnie są zbyt dojrzałe, poważne czy przeciążające dla dzieci, lecz nawet nie zdajemy sobie sprawy, jak już dostrzegają to wszystko w swoim otoczeniu, są świadome. Nie tylko fikcyjnych bohaterów dotykają pewne zjawiska, a książki posiadają niepowtarzalną mocą czynienia ludzi mniej samotnymi. Jaśniejącymi, widzialnymi.
Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody zaczyna się dość niepozornie, towarzyszyło mi uczucie, że w jakiś sposób jestem nie na miejscu. Jednak szybko porwał mnie ten szalony świat, pełen kolorów i obrazów jak z marzeń, a nieubłaganie powiązany ze zdarzeniami o znaczeniu. Patrick Ness napisał śliczną, ciepłą, poruszającą, ciut zagadkową i wprawiającą w zdumienie powieść dla dzieci, przypominającą dorosłym czytelnikom o tych wszystkich małych sekretach skrytych w ich sercach, a dzieciakom ukazującą ich barwne, troszeczkę inne, lecz jak najbardziej prawdziwe odzwierciedlenie. Ten autor lubi tańczyć na granicy absurdu, lecz to wariactwo zawsze ma swoją godność i znaczenie. Zdecydowaniem polecam czytelnikom małym i dużym.
Nie jestem przyzwyczajona do Patricka Nessa wracającego do swoich bohaterów, a tu takie niespodzianki! Do zobaczenia w Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody: The Hat of Great Importance, udomowione bestyjki.
Urokliwa, życzliwa, żartobliwa i niczym mocno bijące serce. Wzruszająca, barwna, szczera i momentami absurdalna, w najlepszym znaczeniu tego słowa. Zaskakująco śmiała i pełna dobrych intencji. Pierwsza część Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody stanowi początek podróży Patricka Nessa wśród krętych ścieżek literatury dziecięcej i nawet po tak długim czasie od mojej pierwszej lektury przynosi ze sobą tylko ciepłe myśli. Autor świetnie splata wątki czysto dziecięce z rzeczami, które absolutnie śniły się kiedyś filozofom, ale obawiali się je wypchnąć na światło dzienne (tak, patrzę na ciebie, Francjo na kolanie). Za pomocą swej wdzięcznej wyobraźni i głębokiego poczucia człowieczeństwa tworzy historię o rzeczach śmiertelnie dla dzieci poważnych i całkowicie dla nich zrozumiałych; a to dlatego, że jako autor traktuje dzieciaki z należytym szacunkiem i rozmawia z nimi jak równy z równym, spoglądając na nie z nadzieją.
Cokolwiek sobie wyśnicie w snach, których nie pamiętacie, Ness pewnie kiedyś wam to odeśle z powrotem. Nie mogę się doczekać trzeciej części przygód o trzech zadziornych jaszczurkach oraz ich uskrzydlonym kumplu, a wy biegnijcie po Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody i dajcie się potraktować z dobrą wiarą.
Oryginalna recenzja:
Gdziekolwiek nie zawędrowałby Patrick Ness w swych próbach literackich, wszędzie przynosi ze sobą powiew świeżości; równocześnie jaśniejąc w samotnych czterech ścianach swych powieści, niezaprzeczalnie. Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody przypomniało mi, jak tęskniłam za taką szczerością w literaturze dziecięcej, trochę słodko-gorzką.
Jaszczurka nie jest nikim, ma imię, Zeke. Jednak poczucie widzialności czasami niesie ze sobą ciężar, zwłaszcza, gdy nie jest się pewnym, jak inni cię dostrzegają ani ile w tym prawdy. A sprawa staje się jeszcze potworniejsza, gdy akurat zauważy cię największy szkolny zbir – pelikański syn największej złoczyńczyni świata.
Nie jestem pewna, czy to kwestia jakiegoś wyjątkowego pociągu autora do dziwacznej strony życia, naginania fikcji do najgłębszych pragnień i wychodzenia poza pudło, czy też naturalnego sposobu postrzegania świata (bo jakże zachwycający byłby ten obraz) Nessa. Wiem jednak, że każda jego powieść, nowelka i opowiadanie zdołało zauroczyć mnie swoimi dziwactwami, urzec postaciami nieprzefiltrowanymi w swoich uczuciach, wytrącić mnie z równowagi, pociągnąć mnie ze sobą bez kompromisu i przyprószyć moją wyobraźnię o rumieniec, uśmiech czy zachwyt. I nie inaczej było z tą malutką powieścią dla dzieci, opowieścią o szkole dla zwierząt, jaszczurce i czarnym psie nawiedzającym jej mamę.
Naprawdę jest to literatura dziecięca, nie musicie postępować po niej ostrożnie, z pewnością możecie podzielić się nią z kochanymi dziećmi. W Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody odnajdziecie szkołę dla zwierząt, bardzo podobną do naszych podstawówek, gdzie każda grupa stworzeń ma określone cechy osobowości i zwyczaje; postacie są dowcipne, słodkie, barwne i w perspektywie dziecięcej czaderskie. Wiąże się z nimi ciekawa refleksja, kto tworzy naszą tożsamość i co wpływa na nasz charakter, ta kwestia może stać się wyjątkowo ważna dla docelowej grupy czytelników (a nawet dla starszych czytelników). Spotkacie się też tutaj z cudownym humorem (znając pozostałe powieści Nessa wiedziałam, że na pewno będzie łapać mnie z zaskoczenia), wspaniałymi zwrotami akcji (było kilka takich scen, które szczególnie osunęły moją szczękę na podłogę, uwielbiam te małe dziwne cudy tego autora) i prawdami dziecięcymi, które nie tracą na wartości z żadnym pokoleniem, wypowiedzianymi bardzo szczerze i z wyrozumiałością. Dzieciaki z pewnością zachwycą pewne sceny akcji (ach, ci superzłoczyńcy pelikany), fantazyjne obrazy i kreacje głównych bohaterów. Jednak największą wartość stanowią oczywiście kwestie poruszane w powieści, takie jak odnajdywanie własnej tożsamości, podejmowanie się odpowiedzialności, radzenie sobie z ciężkimi emocjami, stawanie naprzeciwko problemowi znęcania się w szkole oraz… przechodzenie żałoby po ukochanych osobach oraz bycie obecnym dla tych zmagających się z chorobą. Oprószone są pięknymi, słodko-gorzkimi metaforami; obraz czarnego psa stającego na straży doprowadził mnie do łez, i to wiele razy, a kwestia… kolana głównego bohatera była jednym z najbardziej fantazyjnych i dowcipnych zwrotów akcji, z którymi spotkałam się w tym gatunku. Co tu owijać w bawełnę, buzia otworzyła mi się szeroko i byłam przeszczęśliwa, ogromnie zaskoczona. Ten wątek jest świetnie przeprowadzony. Warto również zwrócić uwagę na to, jak w świecie Patricka Nessa wszyscy są widziani; w powieści pojawiają się postacie z niepełnosprawnością, chorobą oraz bohaterowie ze społeczności LGBTQ+. Jest to przedłużenie tego, o co autor dzielnie walczy w życiu prywatnym i publicznym, oraz piękne przypomnienie dla dziecięcych czytelników, jak my wszyscy nadajemy życiu tak samo wielką wartość. Z pewnością mogą pojawić się głosy, że treści wskazane przeze mnie są zbyt dojrzałe, poważne czy przeciążające dla dzieci, lecz nawet nie zdajemy sobie sprawy, jak już dostrzegają to wszystko w swoim otoczeniu, są świadome. Nie tylko fikcyjnych bohaterów dotykają pewne zjawiska, a książki posiadają niepowtarzalną mocą czynienia ludzi mniej samotnymi. Jaśniejącymi, widzialnymi.
Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody zaczyna się dość niepozornie, towarzyszyło mi uczucie, że w jakiś sposób jestem nie na miejscu. Jednak szybko porwał mnie ten szalony świat, pełen kolorów i obrazów jak z marzeń, a nieubłaganie powiązany ze zdarzeniami o znaczeniu. Patrick Ness napisał śliczną, ciepłą, poruszającą, ciut zagadkową i wprawiającą w zdumienie powieść dla dzieci, przypominającą dorosłym czytelnikom o tych wszystkich małych sekretach skrytych w ich sercach, a dzieciakom ukazującą ich barwne, troszeczkę inne, lecz jak najbardziej prawdziwe odzwierciedlenie. Ten autor lubi tańczyć na granicy absurdu, lecz to wariactwo zawsze ma swoją godność i znaczenie. Zdecydowaniem polecam czytelnikom małym i dużym.
Nie jestem przyzwyczajona do Patricka Nessa wracającego do swoich bohaterów, a tu takie niespodzianki! Do zobaczenia w Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody: The Hat of Great Importance, udomowione bestyjki.
March 23, 2025
Goofy and warm-hearted.
October 5, 2025
Even a brilliant author's first children's book often goes awry. Patrick Ness had released numerous classic YA novels before Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody in 2024, but could he repeat that success for an audience this young? Zeke, Daniel, and Alicia are being named Hall Monitors at their mixed-species school, an honor which Principal Wombat insists has nothing to do with their being monitor lizards. Daniel has a serious lack of tact when relating to others, and Zeke is terminally passive despite his giant size, but perhaps Alicia can help them do their best as Hall Monitors. They've yet to make any massive mistakes...until Pelicarnassus the pelican breaks a rule and must be confronted.
A self-styled supervillain, Pelicarnassus harangues the Hall Monitors until Zeke's patience snaps and he physically strikes the pelican. Violence is forbidden at school; what choice does Principal Wombat have but to relieve Zeke of his Hall Monitor duties? Now Zeke has nothing to distract him from his family troubles that have been bubbling since the death of his father. Zeke's mother is always closed in her bedroom, allowing only a dog to keep her company. Will life ever feel right for Zeke at school or home?
"There are ways back from everything. It doesn't matter what mistake you make or what consequences you have to face from that mistake, it's what you do afterward that's important."
—Alicia, P. 28
Zeke, Daniel, and Alicia make the acquaintance of a blind hawk named Miel, who squawks everything he says so loudly, it's painful to listen. Miel comes on strong but possesses unique wisdom, and helps Zeke gain perspective. Pelicarnassus isn't sitting idly by, though. He's planning an attack on Zeke and the school that could leave the place a pile of rubble, and the Hall Monitors' lives are in danger. Can this mixed society of young animals learn to live together without setting the world aflame?
There are nice moments, but Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody is gratuitously silly. I get the impression Patrick Ness was striving to emulate the wacky superhero stylings of Dav Pilkey's Dog Man series that was popular around this time, but Pilkey had that formula refined better. The whole France storyline, in particular, pushes the silliness envelope too far, but I like this book enough to round my one and a half stars to two. A Monster Calls it is not, but the right reader will derive some amusement.
A self-styled supervillain, Pelicarnassus harangues the Hall Monitors until Zeke's patience snaps and he physically strikes the pelican. Violence is forbidden at school; what choice does Principal Wombat have but to relieve Zeke of his Hall Monitor duties? Now Zeke has nothing to distract him from his family troubles that have been bubbling since the death of his father. Zeke's mother is always closed in her bedroom, allowing only a dog to keep her company. Will life ever feel right for Zeke at school or home?
"There are ways back from everything. It doesn't matter what mistake you make or what consequences you have to face from that mistake, it's what you do afterward that's important."
—Alicia, P. 28
Zeke, Daniel, and Alicia make the acquaintance of a blind hawk named Miel, who squawks everything he says so loudly, it's painful to listen. Miel comes on strong but possesses unique wisdom, and helps Zeke gain perspective. Pelicarnassus isn't sitting idly by, though. He's planning an attack on Zeke and the school that could leave the place a pile of rubble, and the Hall Monitors' lives are in danger. Can this mixed society of young animals learn to live together without setting the world aflame?
There are nice moments, but Chronicles of a Lizard Nobody is gratuitously silly. I get the impression Patrick Ness was striving to emulate the wacky superhero stylings of Dav Pilkey's Dog Man series that was popular around this time, but Pilkey had that formula refined better. The whole France storyline, in particular, pushes the silliness envelope too far, but I like this book enough to round my one and a half stars to two. A Monster Calls it is not, but the right reader will derive some amusement.
December 4, 2024
so wonderful and heartwarming. patrick ness never misses!
April 6, 2024
thanks to edelweiss and walker books for providing this arc in exchange for an honest review
this is Patrick Ness's first middle-grade book (and certainly would not be his last since this would be a series, according to the blurb). And it's been a looooooooong time since I've read a middle grade book, only read this because of the author, and I'm far from being the target audience so it's quite hard to rate. But...
it's a fine [first] book. The characters seems fun and quirky, some are more fleshed out compared to others, which is understandable since it's a very short book for middle-graders. And it's quite a quick read (for me at least), just one sitting.
The themes it would like to tackle like grief but mostly stereotyping is a bit lacking, since this book focuses on just a few different animal characters. Would like to see a more different animal characters in the next book, as part of the "main character" gang. I appreciate Ness adding symbolism(s) here and there and hoping the target audience appreciate them, too.
this is Patrick Ness's first middle-grade book (and certainly would not be his last since this would be a series, according to the blurb). And it's been a looooooooong time since I've read a middle grade book, only read this because of the author, and I'm far from being the target audience so it's quite hard to rate. But...
it's a fine [first] book. The characters seems fun and quirky, some are more fleshed out compared to others, which is understandable since it's a very short book for middle-graders. And it's quite a quick read (for me at least), just one sitting.
The themes it would like to tackle like grief but mostly stereotyping is a bit lacking, since this book focuses on just a few different animal characters. Would like to see a more different animal characters in the next book, as part of the "main character" gang. I appreciate Ness adding symbolism(s) here and there and hoping the target audience appreciate them, too.
June 1, 2024
Zeke and his friend Daniel have just been appointed hall monitors for their school. “This isn’t because you’re monitor lizards.”
“But all the other hall monitors have been monitor lizards.”
“Coincidence!” declares principal wombat.
A book that makes me smile on the first page is usually a winner & Ness doesn’t let me down with this one.
The story is a madcap mix of animal characters - my favourite being Miel the blind red tailed hawk. Miel means honey in French, do you know why Zeke should have known this - because the country of France is situated on Zeke’s knee…Ness explains this much better than I could 😂
This book has plenty of humour but the way that bullying, young carers, mental health issues, loss, families & friendships are woven in is what sold it to me. The middle grade target audience may well see themselves represented here and if they don’t then it will most definitely build empathy for those children that they’re mixing with that may be going through hard times.
“But all the other hall monitors have been monitor lizards.”
“Coincidence!” declares principal wombat.
A book that makes me smile on the first page is usually a winner & Ness doesn’t let me down with this one.
The story is a madcap mix of animal characters - my favourite being Miel the blind red tailed hawk. Miel means honey in French, do you know why Zeke should have known this - because the country of France is situated on Zeke’s knee…Ness explains this much better than I could 😂
This book has plenty of humour but the way that bullying, young carers, mental health issues, loss, families & friendships are woven in is what sold it to me. The middle grade target audience may well see themselves represented here and if they don’t then it will most definitely build empathy for those children that they’re mixing with that may be going through hard times.
Read
November 16, 2024A perfect book. I heard Ness in conversation with Claire Mabey last weekend, and this weekend I needed a book that is both funny and deeply compassionate. Set — without any explanation — in a school for animals, Ness brings together slapstick humour (hawks can't help but YELL WHEN THEY TALK, the school supplies manager is an asshole pony, theres much discussion of the wombat principal's armoured butt) with big childhood problems: bullying, fat shaming, parental depression. the end let good triumph over evil so that the book remains exciting rather than moralistic, but the themes of the power of friendship and the need to remain open to hope shine through.
June 16, 2024
Много приятна детска книжка, която покрива темите за приятелство, училище, тормоз, домашни проблеми, и какво е чувството да имаш държава на коляното (на всеки се е случвало).
November 10, 2025
A Maine Student Book Award Nominee for 25|26.
This was a super cute story about Zeke the monitor lizard, who struggles to find his place, and his friends in middle school. This is a great story with fabulous illustrations. I enjoyed it!
This was a super cute story about Zeke the monitor lizard, who struggles to find his place, and his friends in middle school. This is a great story with fabulous illustrations. I enjoyed it!
March 26, 2025
Read this with my students but it was actually pretty good
April 18, 2025
Un poil laborieux. beaucoup de bonnes idées mais mélangées n'importe comment (le héros a la France sur son genou WTF ?)
October 15, 2024
I have only read books intended for older audiences from Patrick Ness, so it was such a nice surprise to realise his middle grade writing is just as good.
Hall Monitor Lizards has just about everything young readers will be looking for - it’s fast paced, funny, has silly characters and the writing is really quick to get through because of those things. For more mature readers, it’s missing a little too much; it’s a very silly, obvious story which I think even for younger readers perhaps underestimates them a little.
For a fun, easy read this should be a good fit for readers aged 7-10, but I think any older than that it might need a little more depth.
ARC provided from the publishers in exchange for an honest review.
Hall Monitor Lizards has just about everything young readers will be looking for - it’s fast paced, funny, has silly characters and the writing is really quick to get through because of those things. For more mature readers, it’s missing a little too much; it’s a very silly, obvious story which I think even for younger readers perhaps underestimates them a little.
For a fun, easy read this should be a good fit for readers aged 7-10, but I think any older than that it might need a little more depth.
ARC provided from the publishers in exchange for an honest review.
July 21, 2024
This was just lush. Zeke is a wonderful lizard and he’s got some brilliant friends. I chuckled along to this. It’s touching and it’s warm; the stuff with his mam just made me want to hug them both. It’s silly at times. The hawk really made me laugh. Recommend to all. I loved the illustrations throughout too.
June 2, 2024
Patrick Ness and Tim Miller can do no wrong <3
Read
September 15, 2024Zeke and Daniel have just become Hall Monitors but Principal Wombat assures them it’s not because they’re monitor lizards. Alicia, their monitor lizard friend, is also a Hall Monitor.
I’m usually a fan of zany goings-on; my childhood was essentially one big Roald Dahl reread. I love kid’s books but this one didn’t sit right with me.
I was confused.
Pelicarnassus, who sees himself as a supervillain in training, has a mother you definitely don’t want to mess with. Saying that Pelicarnassus’ mother won’t let him do something dastardly when she’s literally a supervillain didn’t make sense. Neither did her response to her son unleashing his evil plan.
Also, Zeke has France on his knee.
My fuddy duddy was on full display. I’m not sure I’ve ever felt so old.
I didn’t think the language used was always appropriate for the target audience (9+). When I was a kid, saying ‘crappy’ or ‘ass’, because I undoubtedly would have repeated them if I’d read them, would have gotten me into trouble.
I also wouldn’t have even considered discussing my Principal’s butt.
I lost count of the amount of times Pelicarnassus called Zeke ‘fat’.
I was pretty literal at that age and wouldn’t have known a black dog can be a symbol for depression.
I liked Miel, the red-tailed hawk, who doesn’t appear to have a volume control. I thought I liked Alicia, especially when I found her relatable.
For a book that claims there’s no excuse for violence, there’s a fair amount of it in its pages. All of the main characters use violence to varying degrees. I’m all for standing up for yourself and your friends but not when it involves punching, pinching and pushing.
There are some glowing reviews for this book so I’d encourage you to read those before deciding if this is the book for you. Plenty of reviewers have found humour where I found red flags. While I was intrigued after reading the blurb, I’m clearly not the audience for this book.
Thank you so much to Walker Books for the opportunity to read this book.
Blog - https://schizanthusnerd.com
“Coincidence”Being cold blooded and from a less affluent area than most of the other students already sets them apart. This new job is likely to make things even worse, especially when the school bully, Pelicarnassus, and his two egret sidekicks (both called Norman) find out.
I’m usually a fan of zany goings-on; my childhood was essentially one big Roald Dahl reread. I love kid’s books but this one didn’t sit right with me.
I was confused.
Pelicarnassus, who sees himself as a supervillain in training, has a mother you definitely don’t want to mess with. Saying that Pelicarnassus’ mother won’t let him do something dastardly when she’s literally a supervillain didn’t make sense. Neither did her response to her son unleashing his evil plan.
Also, Zeke has France on his knee.
My fuddy duddy was on full display. I’m not sure I’ve ever felt so old.
I didn’t think the language used was always appropriate for the target audience (9+). When I was a kid, saying ‘crappy’ or ‘ass’, because I undoubtedly would have repeated them if I’d read them, would have gotten me into trouble.
I also wouldn’t have even considered discussing my Principal’s butt.
I lost count of the amount of times Pelicarnassus called Zeke ‘fat’.
I was pretty literal at that age and wouldn’t have known a black dog can be a symbol for depression.
I liked Miel, the red-tailed hawk, who doesn’t appear to have a volume control. I thought I liked Alicia, especially when I found her relatable.
But she was also kind of happy that she only had two friends in Zeke and Daniel, because any more "would be really tiring", she once said, "and I think I'm kinda lazy."Then she played into my biggest problem with this book.
One swift pinch of an ear, one assertive push behind a knee, and Kevin the yak was down without even entirely realizing that he'd fallen.Recently I heard someone say that nothing makes it okay to use your body to solve a problem and, while I’ve never thought any differently, I’d never heard it explained like that before and I absolutely loved it.
For a book that claims there’s no excuse for violence, there’s a fair amount of it in its pages. All of the main characters use violence to varying degrees. I’m all for standing up for yourself and your friends but not when it involves punching, pinching and pushing.
There are some glowing reviews for this book so I’d encourage you to read those before deciding if this is the book for you. Plenty of reviewers have found humour where I found red flags. While I was intrigued after reading the blurb, I’m clearly not the audience for this book.
Thank you so much to Walker Books for the opportunity to read this book.
Blog - https://schizanthusnerd.com
February 7, 2025
“Sometimes people carry heavy burdens,” she told him now. “Burdens the rest of us can’t really see. We just see the person struggling to carry them, and it’s hard to find the right way to help them.”
I have been reading so many books that are a bit light and quite short and I really wanted something heavy but then I saw this book in my TBR and it’s an easy middle grade book SO I READ THIS INSTEAD hehe.
It’s really just a short and sweet children’s book that’s packed with laughter and funnies that I really really love. It’s humour that is so sweet and innocent and at the same time only as an adult you’d understand. Not only that, the lessons this book teaches us really just makes you go 🥹.
“WHAT HAPPENS IF ZEKE VISTS FRANCE?”
The class fell silent again. They looked at one another. They looked at Zeke. Who, to be honest, was suddenly curious about the answer, too.
THE COMEDIC TIMING OF THIS!! And then we got interrupted and we never really found out what happens if Zeke visits France. HAHAHAHA
I have always loved Patrick’s diverse of describing things and the way he brings up heavy topics in this book is just so 🥺.
The day his father died, Zeke’s mum came home with a black dog. It didn’t speak, it didn’t look at Zeke, it just hung around his mum like a cloud. Some days it let her get up, make him breakfast, go to work – letting her come close to acting like the mum she was before.
But you never knew. Because there were other days when it wouldn’t even let her get out of bed. When it growled if Zeke tried to come near, when it sometimes even bared its teeth at him and barked and chased him out of her room. The door would shut, the black dog would guard it on the other side, and who knew how long it would be before it opened again?
The way depression was described as a black dog?! CRYING, Alexa, play The Black Dog by Taylor Swift NOW!
READ THIS EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE AN ADULT. Can’t wait to share this cute little book with a child one day.
Also can we just talk about how cute the illustrations are? The way it fits into the story and the cute lizards and wombats AHHHH. Thanks Tim!
I have been reading so many books that are a bit light and quite short and I really wanted something heavy but then I saw this book in my TBR and it’s an easy middle grade book SO I READ THIS INSTEAD hehe.
It’s really just a short and sweet children’s book that’s packed with laughter and funnies that I really really love. It’s humour that is so sweet and innocent and at the same time only as an adult you’d understand. Not only that, the lessons this book teaches us really just makes you go 🥹.
“WHAT HAPPENS IF ZEKE VISTS FRANCE?”
The class fell silent again. They looked at one another. They looked at Zeke. Who, to be honest, was suddenly curious about the answer, too.
THE COMEDIC TIMING OF THIS!! And then we got interrupted and we never really found out what happens if Zeke visits France. HAHAHAHA
I have always loved Patrick’s diverse of describing things and the way he brings up heavy topics in this book is just so 🥺.
The day his father died, Zeke’s mum came home with a black dog. It didn’t speak, it didn’t look at Zeke, it just hung around his mum like a cloud. Some days it let her get up, make him breakfast, go to work – letting her come close to acting like the mum she was before.
But you never knew. Because there were other days when it wouldn’t even let her get out of bed. When it growled if Zeke tried to come near, when it sometimes even bared its teeth at him and barked and chased him out of her room. The door would shut, the black dog would guard it on the other side, and who knew how long it would be before it opened again?
The way depression was described as a black dog?! CRYING, Alexa, play The Black Dog by Taylor Swift NOW!
READ THIS EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE AN ADULT. Can’t wait to share this cute little book with a child one day.
Also can we just talk about how cute the illustrations are? The way it fits into the story and the cute lizards and wombats AHHHH. Thanks Tim!
September 23, 2024
Very funny, issue-filled animal school surprise from Ness.
I've read almost every Ness YA novel. And loved them. Seeing his name attached to a book intended for a younger market was a surprise, but I grabbed this instantly.
For a few pages I wasn't sure what I was reading, but when I clicked and I realised the simple-seeming 'school bully' story was actually a lot more than that, I trusted in the writing and enjoyed it.
It's definitely got its age range firmly in mind - two best monitor lizard friends are working out that Principal Wombat (yes he is) has given them 'hall monitor' sashes because of their breed. Even if one of them is tiny, and the school bullies ignore their new status anyway.
Zeke is already sensitive that he's on the large size too, but with his Mum at home being followed around by a 'black dog' since his dad died, and now a new student, a blind hawk screeching out strange and deep thoughts at them, there's already a lot on his plate. And that's not to mention son-of-a-local-supervillain Pelicarnassus, the class bully and with his sights set firmly on taking down Zeke and his friends after a run-in.
What feels like a standard issue story somehow transforms into an all-out quirky hero-fest by the end, which may come as a surprise to readers (and any parents sharing the story). This definitely takes the genre further than most, probably with Ness's experience of The Rest of Us Just Live Here in mind.
Over-the-top in some respects, and very down-t0-earth in others, with some memorable and realistic characters housed in animal skins. Never would have thought to see an evil bully pelican, so there you go.
Great black and white illustrations add to the story and do help you picture the interacting breeds and species in this unique school.
For ages 8/9 and above.
With thanks to Netgalley for providing a sample reading copy.
I've read almost every Ness YA novel. And loved them. Seeing his name attached to a book intended for a younger market was a surprise, but I grabbed this instantly.
For a few pages I wasn't sure what I was reading, but when I clicked and I realised the simple-seeming 'school bully' story was actually a lot more than that, I trusted in the writing and enjoyed it.
It's definitely got its age range firmly in mind - two best monitor lizard friends are working out that Principal Wombat (yes he is) has given them 'hall monitor' sashes because of their breed. Even if one of them is tiny, and the school bullies ignore their new status anyway.
Zeke is already sensitive that he's on the large size too, but with his Mum at home being followed around by a 'black dog' since his dad died, and now a new student, a blind hawk screeching out strange and deep thoughts at them, there's already a lot on his plate. And that's not to mention son-of-a-local-supervillain Pelicarnassus, the class bully and with his sights set firmly on taking down Zeke and his friends after a run-in.
What feels like a standard issue story somehow transforms into an all-out quirky hero-fest by the end, which may come as a surprise to readers (and any parents sharing the story). This definitely takes the genre further than most, probably with Ness's experience of The Rest of Us Just Live Here in mind.
Over-the-top in some respects, and very down-t0-earth in others, with some memorable and realistic characters housed in animal skins. Never would have thought to see an evil bully pelican, so there you go.
Great black and white illustrations add to the story and do help you picture the interacting breeds and species in this unique school.
For ages 8/9 and above.
With thanks to Netgalley for providing a sample reading copy.
November 6, 2024
I’m a huge fan of Patrick Ness and his YA novels and this was not at all what I was expecting. A school of various animals which had the vibe of illustration and feel of Mr Wolf’s Class, another big favourite of mine. Zeke is a Monitor Lizard and he and his other monitor lizard friends are delighted to be given the job of hall monitor. Unfortunately his first hall victim causes trouble for him which sets up the whole book. Zeke’s mum is clearly mentally ill, he manages himself well but deals with the darkness by being grateful for his friends. I just love the whole gentle humour, compassion and love of this book, the scary resource assistant who is a pony, the firm but fair principal who is a wombat, the pelican bully, the blind hawk who shouts. The only thing stopping this being a 5 that I found interesting but just a bit bizarre and may lose the attention of some readers is the weird France on the knee thing. You have to read it to understand it because I can’t possibly explain it.
January 17, 2025
What an amazing book! This book does such a great job of creating imagery to go along with some hard emotions. The black dog had me and my kids in all the feels. And France, the weight and pressure it must be to carry France around. The friendship in this story was absolutely amazing. Now, go grab this book and curly up with your littles to read it.
February 2, 2024
Insanely funny first book in a new Middle Grade series by Patrick Ness!
Read
March 21, 2025Very cute! An excellent balance of funny and touching, as can be expected from Ness. Though this is of course very different from his YA works.
May 3, 2025
Unlike anything I have ever read.
October 17, 2025
This book was funny and touching at the same time, and it had me smiling from the first page. Some of the language seemed a little advanced for the desired age group, but the storyline was great! 4.5 stars.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 134 reviews