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Why Am I Like This?
Farah Garda believes that she’s incapable of change, stuck in a pattern of self-loathing and destructive tendencies. She leaves Cape Town to care for her ailing mother and stumbles into grief, growth, and green smoothies. Love doesn’t save her—she saves herself.
Told with humour and unflinching honesty, Why Am I Like This? follows Farah on her journey to finding purpose in life, perhaps for the very first time.
Told with humour and unflinching honesty, Why Am I Like This? follows Farah on her journey to finding purpose in life, perhaps for the very first time.
192 pages, Kindle Edition
Published October 17, 2025
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Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews
December 15, 2025
3 stars
Listen okay, when I first started this book I thought it was easy to get into and pretty bingeable. Farah reads like one of those messy quirky fmcs in Sophie Kinsella's novels (rip queen) but while Kinsella's characters change for the better and everything gets tied up in a neat little bow by the climax, Hunter leaves a lot to be resolved...
This was initially messy in an enjoyable way but it turned messy in a "wtf is happening" way towards the last few chapters. This was looking to be a 4 star read due to the easy prose, the realness of having an fmc who didn't have her shit together & the relatable moments of depression/life being hard but dammit these last couple chapters really took a nosebleed dive into the "THIS MAKES ZERO SENSE" territory.
So I was like, okay we're looking at 3.5 stars now instead... but man was I wrong. That ending was even worse and I had to drop points immediately... the climax made me wanna hurl this book on the floor coz I was left here so confused and annoyed coz wdym? (Ofc I didn't throw the book coz I'd never hurt a book but gosh I really wanted to just yeet it)
I hate when things don't make sense and this book with that ending is one of them.
SPOILERS BELOW:
This woman never had a proper job btw so please tell me how did she manage to fund her life that too in bougie Cape Town initially + then fund her Jozi life & all her medical expenditures, delivery food service daily, then special dietary stuff + to top it off all the new experiences she had like hot yoga etc. Where in gods name did the floodgates of money come for any of this? Whatever she did to help her health and healing journey certainly wasn't cheap. Heck the medical bills alone would take someone out financially even if that person works. So I don't get how she managed to tune up her whole physical & mental health + appearance when she has no income and then all of a sudden we're told she gets rent from her roommate which basically means she owns that house but it was never actually mentioned at first. Also the funds her dead mum left were untouched at this time. Even when she lent her toxic ex friend 50k it was from her own money as she said, from rent & savings when she was in jozi. WHAT SAVINGS? Then she paid 10k for a hippie retreat which she escaped from coz it was sus. Like again where is she getting this money from? C'mon. Even with getting an income from rent it's not even cutting close to covering these costs + her general living expenses!
Then to top it off at the end the man who strung her along, was hot & cold, and indecisive suddenly tells her he's gonna marry her and she just accepts it like wdym? What happened to all of that growth you had?... I'm... sigh.
So disappointed coz the turn this book took just ruined it so bad. Such a shame.
3 stars though coz I liked the various representations, the way the angsty moments and harsh past of apartheid was written, the diversity, the raw & realness of how depression,anxiety,doubt,insecurity & feeling hopelessness was depicted. Plus the way the author played with our feelings regarding Zaid. I liked that this book sheds light that you aren't alone, lots of people have no direction in their life and depression from it but it doesn't make you worthless. That message was good which is why I'm so mad and sad about this book falling so flat like that towards the end... ugh ruined potential.
• Thanks JBP for the readalong box •
Listen okay, when I first started this book I thought it was easy to get into and pretty bingeable. Farah reads like one of those messy quirky fmcs in Sophie Kinsella's novels (rip queen) but while Kinsella's characters change for the better and everything gets tied up in a neat little bow by the climax, Hunter leaves a lot to be resolved...
This was initially messy in an enjoyable way but it turned messy in a "wtf is happening" way towards the last few chapters. This was looking to be a 4 star read due to the easy prose, the realness of having an fmc who didn't have her shit together & the relatable moments of depression/life being hard but dammit these last couple chapters really took a nosebleed dive into the "THIS MAKES ZERO SENSE" territory.
So I was like, okay we're looking at 3.5 stars now instead... but man was I wrong. That ending was even worse and I had to drop points immediately... the climax made me wanna hurl this book on the floor coz I was left here so confused and annoyed coz wdym? (Ofc I didn't throw the book coz I'd never hurt a book but gosh I really wanted to just yeet it)
I hate when things don't make sense and this book with that ending is one of them.
SPOILERS BELOW:
This woman never had a proper job btw so please tell me how did she manage to fund her life that too in bougie Cape Town initially + then fund her Jozi life & all her medical expenditures, delivery food service daily, then special dietary stuff + to top it off all the new experiences she had like hot yoga etc. Where in gods name did the floodgates of money come for any of this? Whatever she did to help her health and healing journey certainly wasn't cheap. Heck the medical bills alone would take someone out financially even if that person works. So I don't get how she managed to tune up her whole physical & mental health + appearance when she has no income and then all of a sudden we're told she gets rent from her roommate which basically means she owns that house but it was never actually mentioned at first. Also the funds her dead mum left were untouched at this time. Even when she lent her toxic ex friend 50k it was from her own money as she said, from rent & savings when she was in jozi. WHAT SAVINGS? Then she paid 10k for a hippie retreat which she escaped from coz it was sus. Like again where is she getting this money from? C'mon. Even with getting an income from rent it's not even cutting close to covering these costs + her general living expenses!
Then to top it off at the end the man who strung her along, was hot & cold, and indecisive suddenly tells her he's gonna marry her and she just accepts it like wdym? What happened to all of that growth you had?... I'm... sigh.
So disappointed coz the turn this book took just ruined it so bad. Such a shame.
3 stars though coz I liked the various representations, the way the angsty moments and harsh past of apartheid was written, the diversity, the raw & realness of how depression,anxiety,doubt,insecurity & feeling hopelessness was depicted. Plus the way the author played with our feelings regarding Zaid. I liked that this book sheds light that you aren't alone, lots of people have no direction in their life and depression from it but it doesn't make you worthless. That message was good which is why I'm so mad and sad about this book falling so flat like that towards the end... ugh ruined potential.
• Thanks JBP for the readalong box •
December 8, 2025
A cute book, it had the potential but lacked the depth. As a South African author , I adored Qaanitah from her era of Guji girl but this book just felt rushed. The ideas were there and they could’ve been illustrated further. Nonetheless it was a cute, light read, finished in a day
December 27, 2025
Go Qaanitah go ✨✨✨
Love it om Zuid-Afrikaanse fictie te lezen terwijl we in Zuid-Afrika zijn! Light read, soms beetje te onwaarschijnlijk (zou Farah echt R50.000 overmaken naar Daniël in de breedte van één hoofdstuk?), erg vermakelijk
Love it om Zuid-Afrikaanse fictie te lezen terwijl we in Zuid-Afrika zijn! Light read, soms beetje te onwaarschijnlijk (zou Farah echt R50.000 overmaken naar Daniël in de breedte van één hoofdstuk?), erg vermakelijk
December 16, 2025
3.5 ⭐
This was my first Qaanitah Hunter book and definitely not the last! I love reading books by local authors, especially when they feature highly relatable characters that have me going "omg she's just like me".
Farah Nosipho Garda is one such character. I found her witty commentary and propensity for self-sabotage relatable in a darkly humorous self-deprecating manner that had me feeling so seen and so amused. She's the embodiment of the millennial existential crisis. However, what started as "haha relatable" turned to "ouch relatable" very quickly in a way I did not expect. Farah's signature derision continues throughout the book, but it was also met with deep insecurities and crippling grief that largely influences her behaviour in the events that follow.
Farah's life is upturned when her mother is diagnosed with Alzheimer's. She leaves her Cape Town apartment for a retirement village in Joburg, where she where she takes on the role of primary caregiver to her ailing mother. Her mother's rapidly decreasing state, paired with Farah's own internal turmoil and external dysfunction, leaves her suffering in ways I couldn't help relating to. Enter problematic guys, chronic illness and unexpected death, and Farah's already messy life reaches breaking point. It is at this point that Farah is forced to confront her deep-rooted beliefs and self-destructive behaviours. Her journey of healing is one of many highs and many lows, realistic in its portrayal of health and self-discovery. The ending left much to be desired, but I loved the overall core messages this book conveys:
1. Recovery is not linear.
2. Self-love is a daily decision, not a destination.
Raw, unflinching, thought-provoking and tender-hearted. This is a book I won't soon forget.
This was my first Qaanitah Hunter book and definitely not the last! I love reading books by local authors, especially when they feature highly relatable characters that have me going "omg she's just like me".
Farah Nosipho Garda is one such character. I found her witty commentary and propensity for self-sabotage relatable in a darkly humorous self-deprecating manner that had me feeling so seen and so amused. She's the embodiment of the millennial existential crisis. However, what started as "haha relatable" turned to "ouch relatable" very quickly in a way I did not expect. Farah's signature derision continues throughout the book, but it was also met with deep insecurities and crippling grief that largely influences her behaviour in the events that follow.
Farah's life is upturned when her mother is diagnosed with Alzheimer's. She leaves her Cape Town apartment for a retirement village in Joburg, where she where she takes on the role of primary caregiver to her ailing mother. Her mother's rapidly decreasing state, paired with Farah's own internal turmoil and external dysfunction, leaves her suffering in ways I couldn't help relating to. Enter problematic guys, chronic illness and unexpected death, and Farah's already messy life reaches breaking point. It is at this point that Farah is forced to confront her deep-rooted beliefs and self-destructive behaviours. Her journey of healing is one of many highs and many lows, realistic in its portrayal of health and self-discovery. The ending left much to be desired, but I loved the overall core messages this book conveys:
1. Recovery is not linear.
2. Self-love is a daily decision, not a destination.
Raw, unflinching, thought-provoking and tender-hearted. This is a book I won't soon forget.
December 29, 2025
Just finished reading this book. Someone gave it to me since they wanted to get rid of it, and I thought it might give me some insight into growing up in South Africa, as the title said, "Why Am I Like This". However, I never got the answer. It was mostly about the protagonist's present, with little insight into her childhood or adulthood. That said, that part was actually nice to read. The most touching part was her struggles with taking care of her old mother, which makes one worry about their own parents. However, the good things end there.
Spoiler alert: I never understood why the second guy was interested in the protagonist. He randomly strikes up a conversation with her and then forces himself into her life. Just seemed very convenient to me for the sake of building a story. Finally, after stringing her along for such a long time, when we feel that she is finally learning to put herself first, he wants to marry her, and she is ok with that.
Spoiler alert: I never understood why the second guy was interested in the protagonist. He randomly strikes up a conversation with her and then forces himself into her life. Just seemed very convenient to me for the sake of building a story. Finally, after stringing her along for such a long time, when we feel that she is finally learning to put herself first, he wants to marry her, and she is ok with that.
January 10, 2026
Firstly, I read this book in a few days. It was a page turner, quite funny, and messy.
It's refreshing to read African Muslim representation, to read about apartheid not in history books but in fiction where I feel many are more likely to actually resonate with the stories of previous generations than via textbooks and politics.
It also brings awareness to mental health struggles, obesity and dementia. I love this particularly because there's still a lot of stigma in our communities about some of these topics and I hope it dispels some of that. But also as much as I can empathize with her, I want to shake Farah sometimes. Tell her to love herself more.
To walk away. To make better choices. And she DOES, slowly. However, the ending felt rushed and quite honestly very questionable. Perhaps it lays the
foundation for a sequel.
3.5/5
It's refreshing to read African Muslim representation, to read about apartheid not in history books but in fiction where I feel many are more likely to actually resonate with the stories of previous generations than via textbooks and politics.
It also brings awareness to mental health struggles, obesity and dementia. I love this particularly because there's still a lot of stigma in our communities about some of these topics and I hope it dispels some of that. But also as much as I can empathize with her, I want to shake Farah sometimes. Tell her to love herself more.
To walk away. To make better choices. And she DOES, slowly. However, the ending felt rushed and quite honestly very questionable. Perhaps it lays the
foundation for a sequel.
3.5/5
November 30, 2025
Overall, a decent book with an engaging premise, but it’s held back by numerous grammatical errors and noticeable plot inconsistencies.
These issues disrupt the flow and make parts of the story difficult to fully immerse in. It often feels as though little to no proofreading was done before publication, which is disappointing given the book’s potential.
With stronger editing, this could have been a much more impactful and enjoyable read.
These issues disrupt the flow and make parts of the story difficult to fully immerse in. It often feels as though little to no proofreading was done before publication, which is disappointing given the book’s potential.
With stronger editing, this could have been a much more impactful and enjoyable read.
January 1, 2026
Read in one sitting and easy prose . An interesting storyline . Oh Farah! She's really going through alot in her life and feels stuck.
But she has abundant funds( not sure how) which always helps solve most problems right..
I do love the progress she makes and the internal work she does.. i found that most inspiring! Go girl 💪🏻 .
Zaid however.. 🚩🚩🚩💀
I wouldve loved an epilogue to see what happens though 😏
But she has abundant funds( not sure how) which always helps solve most problems right..
I do love the progress she makes and the internal work she does.. i found that most inspiring! Go girl 💪🏻 .
Zaid however.. 🚩🚩🚩💀
I wouldve loved an epilogue to see what happens though 😏
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
December 27, 2025
I enjoyed this book as I found Farah relatable. The story was quirky and fun although the ending was a bit of a surprise (not predictable, just surprising). I was disappointed when I finished the book because I hoped to have more time with Farah.
January 10, 2026
if you're looking for a cliché happy ending, this isn't for you. This book is too 'real' for that.
This isn’t a neatly wrapped, feel-good, happy fiction. It's an honest look at a young (Gen Z) woman still figuring herself out in a big bad world... while we're rooting for her.
Two words come to mind: raw and real. The open-ended ending reflects real life (messy and ongoing) and by the final pages, I found myself wondering whether I’d just read fiction or self-help... so it’s the kind of book that sits with you.
Full review: https://www.whatwaydsays.co.za/book-r...
This isn’t a neatly wrapped, feel-good, happy fiction. It's an honest look at a young (Gen Z) woman still figuring herself out in a big bad world... while we're rooting for her.
Two words come to mind: raw and real. The open-ended ending reflects real life (messy and ongoing) and by the final pages, I found myself wondering whether I’d just read fiction or self-help... so it’s the kind of book that sits with you.
Full review: https://www.whatwaydsays.co.za/book-r...
November 11, 2025
Insanely relatable and so funny 🤣💝⛈️ loved EVERY bit. Qaanitah Hunter is such an inspiration 🌻
December 14, 2025
Quick, easy read. Can’t say that I particularly liked the main character or her choices. I get the point thought, it was about self growth.
Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews