What do you think?
Rate this book
Zweimal sterben
Emma ist gezwungen, das mysteriöse Verschwinden ihres Kindheitsfreundes und Geliebten wieder zu erleben, wenn die Reste eines Kindes ausgegraben werden. Emma ist gezwungen, die Wochen zu erleben, die zu Natalies Tod führen, während sie nach dem Mörder sucht.
240 pages, Paperback
First published August 1, 1991
13 people want to read
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 2 of 2 reviews
June 18, 2020
This is another winner for New Victoria, made even more impressive by the fact that the author was only 25 when she wrote it. On the surface, it tells the story of Emma Kendrick’s childhood friendship with Natalie Mercer, who suddenly disappeared at the age of eight. Over the years, Emma buried the image of Natalie somewhere deep within her. But when Natalie’s body is found, seventeen years later, Emma’s memories begin to return.
The story is told from Emma’s point of view but from two time frames. In the present, Emma is asked by one of Natalie’s old neighbors to look into her death. So, despite her own reservations and that of her best friend Carly, she begins to ask questions. No, this isn’t a thriller in which Emma eventually and stupidly finds herself alone with a killer. Rather, it is a story of loss and love and friendship and abandonment, as Emma loses first her father, then Natalie, then her girlfriend Judy. Even her friend Carly is thinking of changing jobs and moving to a city far away.
But there are also chapters in which Emma has vivid memories of herself and Natalie in the past: in their hidden fort, playing house, talking of the future, just being together in the cold, lonely world. She begins to remember specifics that she had never thought about before—the fact that Natalie once showed up for school with a cast on her arm, her fright at having to leave her home to visit her father after her mother has remarried, the memory of Natalie leaving the school counselor’s office—memories that make her think that Natalie might have been abused.
Although there are lots of lesbians in this one, there is no romance and no sex; the book doesn't call for it. There are a couple of glitches that I am mentioning only in the hope that Lauren reads this and corrects them in any new editions. First, there is a page in which Emma remembers her grandfather having a serious talk with her when she was 14. In the next paragraph, she tells her mother that her grandfather died when she was 12. A second glitch is just an omission. Emma meets Pat Carroll, an older lesbian that she has admired for years, not only for her work in the women’s movement but for her startlingly good looks. When Carly tells her that Pat has the hots for Lauren, Lauren simply doesn’t respond. My god, she has to at least have some thoughts about that. For the record, although I pegged the villain on page 22, I did not guess the murderer. But that’s okay, Emma didn’t’ either.
As far as I know, Lauren, who, like Natalie, was abused as a child, managed to calm her inner demons and live a normal life without having to resort again to literature. Give this one as close to 4 stars as you can without going over. It should be on everyone’s to-read list, although maybe not as high as some others.
Note: This review is included in my book The Art of the Lesbian Mystery Novel, along with information on over 930 other lesbian mysteries by over 310 authors.
The story is told from Emma’s point of view but from two time frames. In the present, Emma is asked by one of Natalie’s old neighbors to look into her death. So, despite her own reservations and that of her best friend Carly, she begins to ask questions. No, this isn’t a thriller in which Emma eventually and stupidly finds herself alone with a killer. Rather, it is a story of loss and love and friendship and abandonment, as Emma loses first her father, then Natalie, then her girlfriend Judy. Even her friend Carly is thinking of changing jobs and moving to a city far away.
But there are also chapters in which Emma has vivid memories of herself and Natalie in the past: in their hidden fort, playing house, talking of the future, just being together in the cold, lonely world. She begins to remember specifics that she had never thought about before—the fact that Natalie once showed up for school with a cast on her arm, her fright at having to leave her home to visit her father after her mother has remarried, the memory of Natalie leaving the school counselor’s office—memories that make her think that Natalie might have been abused.
Although there are lots of lesbians in this one, there is no romance and no sex; the book doesn't call for it. There are a couple of glitches that I am mentioning only in the hope that Lauren reads this and corrects them in any new editions. First, there is a page in which Emma remembers her grandfather having a serious talk with her when she was 14. In the next paragraph, she tells her mother that her grandfather died when she was 12. A second glitch is just an omission. Emma meets Pat Carroll, an older lesbian that she has admired for years, not only for her work in the women’s movement but for her startlingly good looks. When Carly tells her that Pat has the hots for Lauren, Lauren simply doesn’t respond. My god, she has to at least have some thoughts about that. For the record, although I pegged the villain on page 22, I did not guess the murderer. But that’s okay, Emma didn’t’ either.
As far as I know, Lauren, who, like Natalie, was abused as a child, managed to calm her inner demons and live a normal life without having to resort again to literature. Give this one as close to 4 stars as you can without going over. It should be on everyone’s to-read list, although maybe not as high as some others.
Note: This review is included in my book The Art of the Lesbian Mystery Novel, along with information on over 930 other lesbian mysteries by over 310 authors.
July 7, 2019
Last month, my library celebrated Gay Pride Month by having a selection of various books with LGBTQ themes, characters, etc. As I couldn't really go to any of the Pride events going on, I decided to do the next best thing and show my support by picking up this book. What this is in a nutshell is a lesbian murder mystery, but it's not a typical murder mystery. Rather, it is a murder mystery that deals with loss of innocence as well as child abuse and sexual abuse, how one deals with grief, how one remembers their long-forgotten memories of a lover they once lost, and deals with maturity and closure. I read the Author's Note afterward about Jessica's story and how this book was a way to help her let go and move on from a very dark time in her life, and just reading the entire book makes me so glad that Jessica Lauren wrote this book, but at the same time, I am appalled this doesn't get more attention because it really is a fantastic book.
In the story, Emma relives the childhood memories she had with her first lover Natalie. Seventeen years later, Natalie's death resurfaces and now Emma has to cope with her loss, relive what happened in the last few weeks of Natalie's life, and ultimately figure out what happened. As I followed Emma in the story, not only did I learn more about her, but I learned a lot more about Natalie as well, and the same goes with both of their families and the life that Emma has built for herself into adulthood. Even minor characters such as Carly are given time to flesh out, and for a book that is only 182 pages long, that's pretty impressive. What's even more impressive than that is that another character that used to be Emma's girlfriend before the book named Judy is mentioned a lot through the book, and though we don't get to see her, I did get to know about her because there is the comparison of some aspects of the book to what Judy might have been like, so I still got a visual on what kind of person Judy really is.
The character development isn't the only star of the show here. Despite the relative short length of the novel, it still manages to contain the intelligence of a murder mystery thanks to its depth, and that especially goes for Natalie the more I learned about her family. It is also very thematic because it teaches the lesson of how to cope with loss and how to deal with sexual abuse, powerful because its lesbian lead character is beautifully-written and very layered, haunting because of its concept of a long-lost and long-forgotten love (there were parts of the book I wanted to cry at because it's a tearjerker), and once you take all that in, She Died Twice is handled so brilliantly, it is wrapped into a neat bow that makes for an endearing and emotional read.
So yeah, She Died Twice is a brilliant example of what a diamond in the rough is and honestly, I'm shocked this hasn't gotten more people reading this. If you haven't read this yet, you're missing out!
In the story, Emma relives the childhood memories she had with her first lover Natalie. Seventeen years later, Natalie's death resurfaces and now Emma has to cope with her loss, relive what happened in the last few weeks of Natalie's life, and ultimately figure out what happened. As I followed Emma in the story, not only did I learn more about her, but I learned a lot more about Natalie as well, and the same goes with both of their families and the life that Emma has built for herself into adulthood. Even minor characters such as Carly are given time to flesh out, and for a book that is only 182 pages long, that's pretty impressive. What's even more impressive than that is that another character that used to be Emma's girlfriend before the book named Judy is mentioned a lot through the book, and though we don't get to see her, I did get to know about her because there is the comparison of some aspects of the book to what Judy might have been like, so I still got a visual on what kind of person Judy really is.
The character development isn't the only star of the show here. Despite the relative short length of the novel, it still manages to contain the intelligence of a murder mystery thanks to its depth, and that especially goes for Natalie the more I learned about her family. It is also very thematic because it teaches the lesson of how to cope with loss and how to deal with sexual abuse, powerful because its lesbian lead character is beautifully-written and very layered, haunting because of its concept of a long-lost and long-forgotten love (there were parts of the book I wanted to cry at because it's a tearjerker), and once you take all that in, She Died Twice is handled so brilliantly, it is wrapped into a neat bow that makes for an endearing and emotional read.
So yeah, She Died Twice is a brilliant example of what a diamond in the rough is and honestly, I'm shocked this hasn't gotten more people reading this. If you haven't read this yet, you're missing out!
Displaying 1 - 2 of 2 reviews