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ZEN KITTEN THRASHERS: A MELODHARMATIC BIOGRAPHY
They believed spiritual practice made them immune to consequences. Physics disagreed.
Zen Kitten Thrashers started as a book club in a basement—four sincere seekers and their alcoholic guidance counselor turned fake Buddhist guru, trying to understand enlightenment through weekend meditation and academic philosophy.
Then they became a death metal band.
Then they thought performing in extreme conditions would demonstrate their spiritual advancement.
Then they triggered DEFCON 1.
Zen Kitten Thrashers is a deadpan satirical novel that follows a band's escalation from earnest spiritual practice to international incident, exploring how intelligent people construct elaborate frameworks to avoid recognizing what they've become. When substances disguise themselves as sacraments, when confirmation bias masquerades as cosmic validation, and when "crazy wisdom" teaching provides permission for catastrophic judgment—tragedy becomes inevitable, even when everyone involved believes they're approaching enlightenment.
Perfect for readers who The absurdist cultural critique of Confederacy of DuncesThe deadpan satire of David Foster WallaceThe uncomfortable recognition of Educated and The Glass CastleThe spiritual materialism examined in Stripping the Gurus
This book Buddhist terminology used with confident incompetenceLyrics that accidentally translate to "the soul becomes cheese"A drummer who joins because he "doesn't have anywhere else to be"Cats that may or may not be mystical guardians (they're just cats)The worst possible interpretation of "crazy wisdom" teachingAn appendix of hilariously mistranslated death metal lyricsNo redemption arcConsequences
This is dark comedy about addiction, spiritual bypassing, and people who walk into disasters while convinced they're approaching transcendence. The satire is sharp. The tragedy is real. Several characters die badly. The author is not here to make you comfortable.
Part of The Bands That Never Were series—exploring philosophical quandaries through fictional bands that probably shouldn't have existed.
A brutal examination of how spiritual language gets weaponized to avoid accountability. Also, the lyrics translate to dairy products.
Zen Kitten Thrashers started as a book club in a basement—four sincere seekers and their alcoholic guidance counselor turned fake Buddhist guru, trying to understand enlightenment through weekend meditation and academic philosophy.
Then they became a death metal band.
Then they thought performing in extreme conditions would demonstrate their spiritual advancement.
Then they triggered DEFCON 1.
Zen Kitten Thrashers is a deadpan satirical novel that follows a band's escalation from earnest spiritual practice to international incident, exploring how intelligent people construct elaborate frameworks to avoid recognizing what they've become. When substances disguise themselves as sacraments, when confirmation bias masquerades as cosmic validation, and when "crazy wisdom" teaching provides permission for catastrophic judgment—tragedy becomes inevitable, even when everyone involved believes they're approaching enlightenment.
Perfect for readers who The absurdist cultural critique of Confederacy of DuncesThe deadpan satire of David Foster WallaceThe uncomfortable recognition of Educated and The Glass CastleThe spiritual materialism examined in Stripping the Gurus
This book Buddhist terminology used with confident incompetenceLyrics that accidentally translate to "the soul becomes cheese"A drummer who joins because he "doesn't have anywhere else to be"Cats that may or may not be mystical guardians (they're just cats)The worst possible interpretation of "crazy wisdom" teachingAn appendix of hilariously mistranslated death metal lyricsNo redemption arcConsequences
This is dark comedy about addiction, spiritual bypassing, and people who walk into disasters while convinced they're approaching transcendence. The satire is sharp. The tragedy is real. Several characters die badly. The author is not here to make you comfortable.
Part of The Bands That Never Were series—exploring philosophical quandaries through fictional bands that probably shouldn't have existed.
A brutal examination of how spiritual language gets weaponized to avoid accountability. Also, the lyrics translate to dairy products.
406 pages, Kindle Edition
Published November 9, 2025
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December 22, 2025
I won this in a giveaway.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
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