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Learning to Say Goodbye: A memoir of grief and trust
Learning to Say Goodbye
A Memoir of Loss, Love, and What Remains
When a cascade of losses fractures Alexandra’s life, grief becomes both a wilderness and a guide. From Berlin to Dubai, the Seychelles to California, she follows the thin, luminous thread that still connects her to the people she loves - through dreams, uncanny coincidences, and the quiet work of showing up for others at the end of life.
As a pediatric end-of-life doula, Alexandra learns to sit with hard truths and face them with an open heart. What begins as survival becomes a practice of listening for what lingers after goodbye, and trusting that love does not vanish, it changes form.
Told with candor and lyricism, Learning to Say Goodbye is a companion for anyone moving through loss, a testament to how we rebuild a life without pretending it doesn’t hurt, and an invitation to believe that the mystery beyond us is tender, too.
A Memoir of Loss, Love, and What Remains
When a cascade of losses fractures Alexandra’s life, grief becomes both a wilderness and a guide. From Berlin to Dubai, the Seychelles to California, she follows the thin, luminous thread that still connects her to the people she loves - through dreams, uncanny coincidences, and the quiet work of showing up for others at the end of life.
As a pediatric end-of-life doula, Alexandra learns to sit with hard truths and face them with an open heart. What begins as survival becomes a practice of listening for what lingers after goodbye, and trusting that love does not vanish, it changes form.
Told with candor and lyricism, Learning to Say Goodbye is a companion for anyone moving through loss, a testament to how we rebuild a life without pretending it doesn’t hurt, and an invitation to believe that the mystery beyond us is tender, too.
345 pages, Kindle Edition
Published December 3, 2025
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Displaying 1 of 1 review
November 26, 2025
4.8 stars
Learning to Say Goodbye is less a memoir about loss and more a study in human attention—what we notice, what we ignore, and how meaning forms in the space between. Instead of presenting grief as a dramatic turning point, Alexandra Dionisio reveals it as a continuous recalibration of the senses: the way a room’s temperature shifts during a hospital visit, the hush that falls before a difficult conversation, or the unexpected steadiness that appears when caring for a child at the end of life.
What stands out most is her sensitivity to the ordinary. She treats daily life—brewing espresso, brushing past a flower stand, fumbling through a conversation—as raw data that shapes our emotional intelligence. This approach mirrors findings in contemporary psychology suggesting that resilience often emerges in small, repeated acts of presence rather than in sweeping revelations. Dionisio’s encounters with parents, clinicians, and her own inner world underscore this idea. Their stories aren’t framed as lessons; they feel more like invitations to observe more closely.
The book also challenges the common belief that clarity comes only from certainty. Here, clarity grows from ambiguity—moments that resist explanation yet influence how people connect with one another in moments of fear or tenderness. Whether readers interpret these moments spiritually, symbolically, or psychologically, the memoir leaves space for multiple interpretations without insisting on one.
This work is ideal for readers who appreciate emotionally intelligent nonfiction—those curious about the subtleties of caregiving, the quiet labor of love, and the complicated choreography of supporting others through their hardest hours. It may be less engaging for those expecting a linear narrative or traditional plot-driven storytelling.
Above all, Learning to Say Goodbye reminds us that the deepest transformations often occur not at the peaks of crisis but in the softer margins of life, where attention sharpens and the heart, finally, listens.
Note: I received an ARC of this book, but that does not affect the impartiality of my review.
Learning to Say Goodbye is less a memoir about loss and more a study in human attention—what we notice, what we ignore, and how meaning forms in the space between. Instead of presenting grief as a dramatic turning point, Alexandra Dionisio reveals it as a continuous recalibration of the senses: the way a room’s temperature shifts during a hospital visit, the hush that falls before a difficult conversation, or the unexpected steadiness that appears when caring for a child at the end of life.
What stands out most is her sensitivity to the ordinary. She treats daily life—brewing espresso, brushing past a flower stand, fumbling through a conversation—as raw data that shapes our emotional intelligence. This approach mirrors findings in contemporary psychology suggesting that resilience often emerges in small, repeated acts of presence rather than in sweeping revelations. Dionisio’s encounters with parents, clinicians, and her own inner world underscore this idea. Their stories aren’t framed as lessons; they feel more like invitations to observe more closely.
The book also challenges the common belief that clarity comes only from certainty. Here, clarity grows from ambiguity—moments that resist explanation yet influence how people connect with one another in moments of fear or tenderness. Whether readers interpret these moments spiritually, symbolically, or psychologically, the memoir leaves space for multiple interpretations without insisting on one.
This work is ideal for readers who appreciate emotionally intelligent nonfiction—those curious about the subtleties of caregiving, the quiet labor of love, and the complicated choreography of supporting others through their hardest hours. It may be less engaging for those expecting a linear narrative or traditional plot-driven storytelling.
Above all, Learning to Say Goodbye reminds us that the deepest transformations often occur not at the peaks of crisis but in the softer margins of life, where attention sharpens and the heart, finally, listens.
Note: I received an ARC of this book, but that does not affect the impartiality of my review.
Displaying 1 of 1 review