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Growing Through Grief: A Compassionate Guide to Finding Meaning and Purpose After Life-Altering Loss
If you've experienced profound loss, you may feel numb, disoriented, or despondent. The last thing you want to hear is that "time heals all wounds." It sounds like an empty promise—one that negates the importance of what has passed. The truth is that you may never fully heal—and that is okay. You can still go on to live a rich, meaningful, and vibrant life. This gentle guide will help you transform the overwhelming sadness of grief into validation, hope, and personal growth.
In this book, psychotherapist and death doula Alex Mammadyarov presents a step-by-step, comprehensive, and transformative process to help you cultivate present moment awareness, resilience, and self-compassion after the life-altering shock of a significant loss. You'll learn to ride the ebbs and flows of grief that rear up in the midst of painful anniversaries and events—so you can navigate your new reality, relieve suffering, and grow. You'll also find comfort and clarity as you face the challenges of our insensitive, "get over it" culture that prevents you from being fully seen during this difficult time.
It's time for a new way of looking at grief—one that is honest and vulnerable, and honors what's been lost. With this profound guide, you'll learn to grow around your grief—instead of moving past it—to create more meaning, purpose, and connection.
In this book, psychotherapist and death doula Alex Mammadyarov presents a step-by-step, comprehensive, and transformative process to help you cultivate present moment awareness, resilience, and self-compassion after the life-altering shock of a significant loss. You'll learn to ride the ebbs and flows of grief that rear up in the midst of painful anniversaries and events—so you can navigate your new reality, relieve suffering, and grow. You'll also find comfort and clarity as you face the challenges of our insensitive, "get over it" culture that prevents you from being fully seen during this difficult time.
It's time for a new way of looking at grief—one that is honest and vulnerable, and honors what's been lost. With this profound guide, you'll learn to grow around your grief—instead of moving past it—to create more meaning, purpose, and connection.
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Published December 1, 2025
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Displaying 1 - 10 of 10 reviews
January 22, 2026
When I was adding this book to my list some time ago, I had no idea I would need it so soon.
I liked it direct but compassionate approach. It doesn't say that everything is going to by okay or that you need to let go and things like that. It acknowledges grief and loss and is not afraid to say how terrible the experience can be. It meets you where you're at and it's validating. A lot of it probably flied over my head but I think that I may come back to it one day (or maybe soon).
I really miss my friend and I am grateful for this little book that in some ways helped with my first steps in this new world without him.
I liked it direct but compassionate approach. It doesn't say that everything is going to by okay or that you need to let go and things like that. It acknowledges grief and loss and is not afraid to say how terrible the experience can be. It meets you where you're at and it's validating. A lot of it probably flied over my head but I think that I may come back to it one day (or maybe soon).
I really miss my friend and I am grateful for this little book that in some ways helped with my first steps in this new world without him.
December 1, 2025
A deeply, compassionate and honest guide that will support anyone dealing with a new loss or those grappling with loss experienced in the past. The author feels like a friend with her hand reached out who gets it. I’m so glad a book of this kind has finally arrived in the world. It should be a staple in everyone’s book collection.
April 28, 2026
One of the more helpful grief books I’ve read in this stupid horrible garbage time. I listened to the audiobook and I definitely vibed with this narrator more than my previous audiobook.
Parts that I had to pause and rewind so I could type out the quote. (Also as I’m writing this, I got a Finch notification from my bird named Dalton that says “thinking of you” and I know it’s not a sign but I’m choosing to believe 💜)
✨ “The pressure to white knuckle our way through grief is still there because we struggle to witness one another in our vulnerability. It is so hard to be with what cannot be fixed when in the digital age we have access to solutions at our fingertips all the time. It is easier to avert our eyes and hope people figure out how to deal with it, or hide it away so we can stop experiencing the discomfort that arises when we don’t feel useful to others. Regardless of whether your loss occurred months or years ago, you may have attempted to return to normal, perhaps feeling the pressure of this grief-phobic society. Or maybe because you are yearning for some relief. It is an understandable wish. Maybe if I try to act normally, I’ll be okay.” (Chapter 1)
✨ “A sense of purpose might be helpful. You may even welcome and find relief in the call to continue on…loss has upended your life. The events that have occurred, the feelings swelling inside of you, you have had no say in any of it. You have given no permission. Your job is right there, waiting inside your computer and all you need to do is send an email sharing that you’ll be back on Monday. You’ll be back as in your body will be back in the office.” (Chapter 4) WOOOFFFFF THIS IS SO GODDAMN REAL I went back to work 2 weeks after my brother died and it was hard as hell but I also couldn’t feel anything and didn’t care about anything and the routine was almost “nice.”
✨ “The goal is not to feel less. It is to feel through.” (Chapter 5) literally paused the audiobook, this sentence hit like a punch to the chest.
✨ “A common theme we process is that a whole season can be tinged with loss or anticipation, as a slow wave of dread creeps through one or two months. Sometimes the anticipation can feel even more intense than the day itself. People tend to assume that the greater number have years that have passed, the less painful the loss. However, anniversaries can sharpen the edges of grief because they highlight the passage of time.“ (Chapter 5) okay so basically every Fall holiday season leading up to January 14 is going to fucking suck for the rest of my life gr8!!!!
✨ “It’s okay to feel like the loss is a big part of your life and you’re not alone in this. The very fact that I’m writing this book shows that regardless of how many years pass, the loss of my parents has remained a core part of me. At the same time, I make space for other parts of me to emerge so that loss, while stitched into the fabric of who I am, does not consume my identity.” (Chapter 7)
✨ “It can be terrifying to contemplate that the depth of our pain will ease and the loss will remain. We might even feel that it is almost a service to our people, to remain bound in mourning, as the concept of joy becomes a betrayal. Trust that you do not need to cling to that early darkness to stay connected. To slowly and softly move in the direction of joy is to move in the direction of the person you lost. Trust that finding happiness again will not take you further away from them. Instead it will bring you closer.” (Chapter 9)
Parts that I had to pause and rewind so I could type out the quote. (Also as I’m writing this, I got a Finch notification from my bird named Dalton that says “thinking of you” and I know it’s not a sign but I’m choosing to believe 💜)
✨ “The pressure to white knuckle our way through grief is still there because we struggle to witness one another in our vulnerability. It is so hard to be with what cannot be fixed when in the digital age we have access to solutions at our fingertips all the time. It is easier to avert our eyes and hope people figure out how to deal with it, or hide it away so we can stop experiencing the discomfort that arises when we don’t feel useful to others. Regardless of whether your loss occurred months or years ago, you may have attempted to return to normal, perhaps feeling the pressure of this grief-phobic society. Or maybe because you are yearning for some relief. It is an understandable wish. Maybe if I try to act normally, I’ll be okay.” (Chapter 1)
✨ “A sense of purpose might be helpful. You may even welcome and find relief in the call to continue on…loss has upended your life. The events that have occurred, the feelings swelling inside of you, you have had no say in any of it. You have given no permission. Your job is right there, waiting inside your computer and all you need to do is send an email sharing that you’ll be back on Monday. You’ll be back as in your body will be back in the office.” (Chapter 4) WOOOFFFFF THIS IS SO GODDAMN REAL I went back to work 2 weeks after my brother died and it was hard as hell but I also couldn’t feel anything and didn’t care about anything and the routine was almost “nice.”
✨ “The goal is not to feel less. It is to feel through.” (Chapter 5) literally paused the audiobook, this sentence hit like a punch to the chest.
✨ “A common theme we process is that a whole season can be tinged with loss or anticipation, as a slow wave of dread creeps through one or two months. Sometimes the anticipation can feel even more intense than the day itself. People tend to assume that the greater number have years that have passed, the less painful the loss. However, anniversaries can sharpen the edges of grief because they highlight the passage of time.“ (Chapter 5) okay so basically every Fall holiday season leading up to January 14 is going to fucking suck for the rest of my life gr8!!!!
✨ “It’s okay to feel like the loss is a big part of your life and you’re not alone in this. The very fact that I’m writing this book shows that regardless of how many years pass, the loss of my parents has remained a core part of me. At the same time, I make space for other parts of me to emerge so that loss, while stitched into the fabric of who I am, does not consume my identity.” (Chapter 7)
✨ “It can be terrifying to contemplate that the depth of our pain will ease and the loss will remain. We might even feel that it is almost a service to our people, to remain bound in mourning, as the concept of joy becomes a betrayal. Trust that you do not need to cling to that early darkness to stay connected. To slowly and softly move in the direction of joy is to move in the direction of the person you lost. Trust that finding happiness again will not take you further away from them. Instead it will bring you closer.” (Chapter 9)
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
December 1, 2025
If you yearn to feel deeply understood and seen in the often lonely journey of grief, look no further. Alex skillfully weaves her personal experience with significant losses with her clinical expertise in the field to create a warm companion book to your grief. Since reading it, I feel more at peace with my own (at times tumultuous) grief journey and better equipped to support people navigating theirs. Alex offers grace, perspective, and comfort through each page. Moving forward, I feel more confident in how I will navigate my grief. “Growing Through Grief” could not be more aptly named as her words deliver comfort, hope, and guidance. I could not recommend this book highly enough!
January 11, 2026
Great thanks to Tantor Media, Inc, Libro.fm, and the American Library Association for the ALC of the audiobook. The book is now available for purchase from your local independent bookstores as well as Libro.fm.
A thorough, direct, and very useful book.
While I am years removed from my most significant loss and have spent those years in therapy, I still found this book to be an excellent way to engage with that therapy work. Even when the author discussed techniques, such as box breathing, that have long been part of my recovery I found it reaffirming and therefore very helpful to hear about. Perhaps more significant was how holistic the author presented grief work: touching on the myriad angles that grief can come to a person and recognizing that sometimes the work doesn't and cannot begin until months or even years after the loss.
A thorough, direct, and very useful book.
While I am years removed from my most significant loss and have spent those years in therapy, I still found this book to be an excellent way to engage with that therapy work. Even when the author discussed techniques, such as box breathing, that have long been part of my recovery I found it reaffirming and therefore very helpful to hear about. Perhaps more significant was how holistic the author presented grief work: touching on the myriad angles that grief can come to a person and recognizing that sometimes the work doesn't and cannot begin until months or even years after the loss.
December 14, 2025
Growing through grief was very in line with a lot of other books relating to grief but what I really enjoyed was how the author allowed the grief to really suck. They acknowledge that sometimes there won't be the right words or right thing to do that will make you feel even a little bit better- it just gets to suck.
The author easily wove in their experiences in a clinical setting without the book feeling too technical and the whole thing felt really warm.
The author easily wove in their experiences in a clinical setting without the book feeling too technical and the whole thing felt really warm.
December 16, 2025
As a fellow griever and therapist, Alex’s writing is a profound source of comfort and guidance. In each chapter, she beautifully weaves heartfelt stories with insightful, practical tools that leave you feeling truly seen and supported. Growing Through Grief is a companion-- a book that meets you where you are and reminds you that you’re not alone in your healing. A must read!
January 2, 2026
One of the best grief books I’ve ever read (and I’ve read almost 100 in my short life!). Alex beautifully sorts growing through grief into clear topics while interweaving stories, metaphors, and journaling prompts so that you can make the book your own. Truly a support book for life after the death of a loved one I’ll recommend again and again.
April 23, 2026
Thoughtful and caring, this book was written by a psychologist and therapist but also by a grieving daughter who lost both parents in childhood. Helpful and gentle with much good advice and practices.
April 12, 2026
This is a super helpful, friendly guide to working through grief. I found the author to be incredibly kind, knowledgeabe and patient.
Displaying 1 - 10 of 10 reviews