If

by Nicholas Bourbaki

In If, you are the nameless protagonist, a young dreamer from northern California. At the end of each chapter, you must make a decision, some seemingly frivolous, some traumatic, but all far from inconsequential. These decisions shape your identity as the novel swerves toward twenty-two possible endings. From the margins of starvation in a third world country, to a romance in Paris, to an opulent party in a Manhattan high-rise, your life becomes the unexpected result of the choices you make. Can there be too much freedom? OR, conversely, how much of life lies within our control?

Genres: Choose Your Own Adventure, Fiction, Gamebooks

375 pages, Kindle Edition

First published July 20, 2014

Reviews

[Escopeta De]

I know it's over. I was born a choker, nobody's coming for me.

[Finlay · Rating 1 out of 5]

I recently got the sudden desire to try a "Choose Your Own Adventure" type book, and this is one of a small number that have been written in recent years.

I found this descended into tedium pretty quickly. Part of the gimmick is that the book's writing style often changes with each choice, and some of the chapters had things like archaic language or seven-page-long paragraphs, which I confess to having skimmed. Another part of the gimmick is that the nameless main character ("you") often discusses choice and philosophy directly, and it's evident that the choices aren't meant to have any realistic effect on the plot - but that doesn't stop me getting annoyed when the book offers me the chance to kiss a naked guy and then tells me that "you" didn't really like it and went straight back to pursuing one of the interchangeable female characters. That plus the more homophobic characters in the "childhood" chapters near the "beginning" of the book left a sour taste in my mouth.

I also got the distinct sense that the author is trying to write a memoir of sorts at times, but trying to be philosophical or postmodern about it - what if I'd done "that" instead? or something like that. But it comes across as navel-gazing. It's never more clear than the chapter describing "your" experience at New Year's in Germany with "your" non-English-speaking Japanese girlfriend. The story seemed too real to have been made up, too specific to the culture shocks that the character gets.

Anyway, not really what I was wanting from a CYOA book. I'm probably gonna go back to Ryan North's Shakespeare adaptations or something. At least find me a book that LETS ME BE GAY.

[Sofía Lopez]

aguante twenty one pilots

[C.P. Cabaniss · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read a book similar to this as a child and have been fascinated by the idea ever since. The story is determined by you. You make a decision at the end of the chapter that determines where you go next. I think the flow based on these decisions worked very well. The point that this fell short for me was the story itself (or stories). I just felt like there was really no connection to the story for me. Definitely an interesting read based purely on the concept of choosing the path of the novel. My full review can be found here: http://courtneysreads.blogspot.com/20...

[Cassie]

Poorly written. Don’t bother reading.

[Sterling Wesson · Rating 1 out of 5]

My first ever 1 star on Goodreads I believe. This was not only filled with an incredible amount of sexism, discrimination and just about every crime you can think of, but also just not well written in the slightest. The main character/you are such an insufferable asshole in seemingly every timeline that you have no desire to see where their story ends up. The misogyny in this book is EXCESSIVE.

[Nick Carter · Rating 4 out of 5]

Only because I’ve read House of Leaves does this come in 2nd on my list of “Most Unconventional Reads.” This novel was quite a journey.

I love the idea of choose-your-own-adventure stories, ever since I read the R.L. Stine books as a kid. Combining that structural novelty with the presentation of various philosophical stances and a wide array of narrative styles, Nicholas Bourbaki (if that is your real name, sir[s]) creates a rich, layered experience.

Some of the parts - in another similarity to House of Leaves - seem intentionally written to discourage you from wanting to even finish reading particular decision paths. But given the philosophical depths of this book, you end up diving into your own discomfort instead of ranting at the author.

4/5, though. There are a few parts in the book that, given my passion for building inclusive cultures, I didn’t enjoy.

[Kassandra · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Choose Your Own Adventure" for eternal adolescents. The only clear lesson to take from it is, watch out for white guys who skipped grades and majored in things like philosophy or literature. They tend to be kind of fucked up.

[Emily · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is half choose-your-own-adventure book, half thought experiment on the nature of free will. There is a map of endings in the back if you want to read in a somewhat linear fashion, but there is no "main" narrative; only paths that are longer than others.

[Ryan Pangilinan · Rating 3 out of 5]

Giving this a 2.5/5.0

I bought this book a while back because I wanted to try reading one of those Choose-Your-Own-Adventure novels, but one that was targeted towards adults. In this one, "you" are, at the beginning, a young I want to say 6th grade kid who's apparently quite smart and actually skipped two grades. From there, you just read, and whenever a choice presents itself, you follow to the base that it takes you. The pace moves relatively quickly, as the choices you make lead you down into further stages of life in many cases. I guess the whole point was to emphasize that these choices can have a large impact on life? Sometimes it felt a bit absurd, and other moments, kind of felt recycled, and had the same kind of tone. There are a couple scenarios that I did enjoy, and for certain had a different tone to it, but much felt kind of samey, at least in tone. That tone being kind of cynical in many of the scenarios.

It's an experimental story so I respect what it did, and it's worth just taking a look at it for that, but I wouldn't say you'd have to read and see all the endings like I did. Though that wouldn't take too long either.

[mia · Rating 5 out of 5]

when i first finished this one, i felt like i was hit by a truck. especially when Francis said "you had your chance. you missed it."
this is a book of choices, and i wasn't ready for it. so i decided to take that chance again, even though technically, the side of the story that i chose ended so sudden for me.
either way, reading all the passages will, sooner or later, wind up cancelling out every choice (ironically enough??) and personally, i think that's the reason why i loved it so much.
or maybe because it was the first CYOA i've ever read.
or maybe because i found the book itself very disturbing.

anyway, stream choker by twenty one pilots ;)

[Vincent · Rating 5 out of 5]

I stumbled across this book at the AWP conference. The publisher had a table and hand sold me this saying it was a choose your own adventure novel for adult readers. Which it is, but the larger themes of choice... I couldn't have known they were coming. There are moments that made me shudder, made me laugh, made me squirm. I'll not bother to sum up the many possible outcomes and scenarios. Just know that the back jacket does not lie: each path leads to no wisdom. (PS: nice shout out to Finnegans Wake, Mr. Bourbaki, or whatever your real name is.)

[Katherine · Rating 3 out of 5]

So I’ve gone through it and got to 3 different endings now and will probably go back once I’ve read something else to see what the other are like. Parts of this book were really interesting and fun but in particular some of the endings are very abrupt and I wish there were more chapters in those story lines so I could keep going

[Zahir]

There were times when I was fully enveloped and on the edge of my seat, and there were times when I forgot to finish the book and left it untouched for a month or two. I have to admit that I absolutely loved the way it ended for me. After having explored all the decisions in the book, I concluded with the paths leading from 219 and I sincerely don’t think it could have ended a better way for me.

[Someone Or Other · Rating 1 out of 5]

I read the whole thing, i.e., I tried every possible path in the decision tree of this choose-your-own adventure book. It is complete crap. If you want to read 10 pages of poorly-written, stream-of-consciousness philosophical ramblings between each decision, be my guest. Themes of rape, abuse, and extreme substance abuse abound. Have at it.

[Jen Ifer's Inklings · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was really looking forward to this choose your own adventure experience. Unfortunately, it was not a fun experience. Every choice turned me into more of a dick, even when I was intentionally picking the least dick-ish option. Ugh. Not fun.

[Midweekpurple · Rating 2 out of 5]

An experimental novel where the idea was wonderful but didn't quite live up to my expectations. Although, I did enjoy the Hell Loop I found myself in during one ending it wasn't as gripping as I'd have hoped.

[Isaac Boyd · Rating 3 out of 5]

Reminds me of reading Choose Your Own Adventure books when I was a kid. Only with a lot more underage sex and drugs, profanity, and violence than I remember.

[Lee-Ann27.reads · Rating 2 out of 5]

This was a choose your own adventure book that was a prompt for my 2019 Pop Sugar Reading Challenge