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Putting the Toilet Seat Down: A Man’s Guide to Feminism
For centuries, it has been (wrongly) believed that men are the superior gender. But what have we based that on? What research has been conducted to prove this?
Men are stronger. Men have had more power. So obviously, men must be superior.
Well . . . not quite.
Is it simply conditioning? At what point will we accept that feminism isn’t about one gender being better than another. It is about all genders being treated equally.
Putting the Toilet Seat Down is not only Feminism 101 but the first step we can take towards equal living. It is a no-gyaan, no-judgement guide for anyone who is curious (or confused) about feminism. Or for anyone who wants to unlearn their biases. With answers to questions like what is feminism, why do we need it in today’s world and do feminists hate men, this funny, engaging and nuanced graphic narrative breaks down big ideas with logic, humour, sensitivity and just the right amount of self-roasting.
Instead of lectures, you’ll get real talk—backed by history, science, and real-life examples — about why questioning your own biases doesn’t make you ‘less of a man’; just a better, more empathetic ally.
It’s about understanding the world a little better, and maybe becoming a better person in the process.
Men are stronger. Men have had more power. So obviously, men must be superior.
Well . . . not quite.
Is it simply conditioning? At what point will we accept that feminism isn’t about one gender being better than another. It is about all genders being treated equally.
Putting the Toilet Seat Down is not only Feminism 101 but the first step we can take towards equal living. It is a no-gyaan, no-judgement guide for anyone who is curious (or confused) about feminism. Or for anyone who wants to unlearn their biases. With answers to questions like what is feminism, why do we need it in today’s world and do feminists hate men, this funny, engaging and nuanced graphic narrative breaks down big ideas with logic, humour, sensitivity and just the right amount of self-roasting.
Instead of lectures, you’ll get real talk—backed by history, science, and real-life examples — about why questioning your own biases doesn’t make you ‘less of a man’; just a better, more empathetic ally.
It’s about understanding the world a little better, and maybe becoming a better person in the process.
291 pages, Kindle Edition
Published December 30, 2025
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Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews
February 26, 2026
I picked up " Putting the Toilet Seat Down" out of curiosity, wondering how a male author would approach a topic that is often misunderstood and debated. What I found instead was a refreshing, honest, and surprisingly engaging introduction to feminism that feels more like a conversation than a lecture.
Harshveer Jain explains feminism in a simple, relatable way, breaking down complicated ideas through humor, comics, and everyday situations. The book gently challenges common myths , especially the belief that feminism is about women being superior to men and instead highlights that it is about equality, respect, and fairness for everyone. The approachable tone makes even uncomfortable discussions feel safe and easy to understand.
What I appreciated most was how the book encourages self-reflection without blaming or shaming the reader. It invites people to question long-held assumptions and see empathy and awareness as strengths rather than weaknesses. The graphic storytelling style adds warmth and accessibility, making serious topics feel less intimidating.
While it works best as an introductory guide rather than a deep academic study, that is exactly where its strength lies. It opens the door for dialogue and understanding, making feminism feel human, practical, and relevant to everyday life.
Overall, this is a thoughtful and beginner-friendly read that simplifies an important conversation and reminds us that equality benefits everyone.
Harshveer Jain explains feminism in a simple, relatable way, breaking down complicated ideas through humor, comics, and everyday situations. The book gently challenges common myths , especially the belief that feminism is about women being superior to men and instead highlights that it is about equality, respect, and fairness for everyone. The approachable tone makes even uncomfortable discussions feel safe and easy to understand.
What I appreciated most was how the book encourages self-reflection without blaming or shaming the reader. It invites people to question long-held assumptions and see empathy and awareness as strengths rather than weaknesses. The graphic storytelling style adds warmth and accessibility, making serious topics feel less intimidating.
While it works best as an introductory guide rather than a deep academic study, that is exactly where its strength lies. It opens the door for dialogue and understanding, making feminism feel human, practical, and relevant to everyday life.
Overall, this is a thoughtful and beginner-friendly read that simplifies an important conversation and reminds us that equality benefits everyone.
January 11, 2026
This is a topic most people often misinterpret if you follow social media and Harshveer Jain (the man behind story seller comics on IG) has done a phenomenal job on addressing most if not all questions around the topic and did it in a very simple way to make people understand what Feminism is and isn't and how it's actually beneficial for all genders. A must read.
February 16, 2026
Book Review: Putting the Toilet Seat Down by Harshveer Jain.
Putting the Toilet Seat Down by Harshveer Jain is a refreshing, honest, and much-needed introduction to feminism, especially for men who are curious, confused, or even slightly uncomfortable with the word itself. With humor, relatable examples, and a graphic narrative style, the book makes conversations about gender equality feel accessible rather than intimidating.
Right from the beginning, the book challenges a long-standing assumption, the belief that men are the superior gender. Instead of attacking or blaming, Author asks simple but powerful questions. What research proves male superiority? Is strength the only measure of worth? Has power historically equaled capability orr just opportunity? By encouraging readers to question conditioning rather than defend it, the book creates space for reflection instead of resistance.
What makes this book stand out is its tone. It is not academic, or judgmental. The subtitle calls it a “no-gyaan, no-judgement guide,” and that promise is genuinely delivered. The writing feels like a conversation with a self-aware friend who is willing to poke fun at himself while also addressing serious issues. Through humor and self-roasting moments, Jain breaks down heavy topics - patriarchy, gender roles, bias, and allyship into bite-sized, understandable ideas.
The graphic format adds another layer of engagement. Visual storytelling makes complex social concepts easier to digest and more relatable. Instead of long lectures, readers get scenarios, dialogue, and examples drawn from everyday life. This makes the book especially effective for those who might otherwise feel defensive or overwhelmed by discussions around feminism.
One of the book’s strongest aspects is how it reframes feminism. It clearly states that feminism is not about women being superior to men. It is about equality, about fairness in opportunities, safety, respect, and representation. Author also tackles common misconceptions, such as the idea that feminists hate men. By addressing these myths directly, he removes fear and replaces it with clarity.
Importantly, the book emphasizes that questioning one’s biases does not make someone “less of a man.” Instead, it highlights that empathy, awareness, and accountability are strengths. This message is crucial in a society where masculinity is often narrowly defined. Author encourages readers to grow without shame, which makes the learning process feel empowering rather than accusatory.
However, readers looking for deep academic analysis may find the book more introductory than exhaustive. It serves best as Feminism 101, a starting point rather than the final word. But that is precisely its purpose. It opens the door for dialogue and self-reflection.
Overall, Putting the Toilet Seat Down is a smart, engaging, and approachable guide to understanding feminism and gender equality. It simplifies complex ideas without oversimplifying them. Most importantly, it invites readers to become better allies, not through guilt, but through understanding. It’s a thoughtful reminder that equality benefits everyone, and that unlearning bias is not a loss of identity, but a step toward becoming a better human being.
Putting the Toilet Seat Down by Harshveer Jain is a refreshing, honest, and much-needed introduction to feminism, especially for men who are curious, confused, or even slightly uncomfortable with the word itself. With humor, relatable examples, and a graphic narrative style, the book makes conversations about gender equality feel accessible rather than intimidating.
Right from the beginning, the book challenges a long-standing assumption, the belief that men are the superior gender. Instead of attacking or blaming, Author asks simple but powerful questions. What research proves male superiority? Is strength the only measure of worth? Has power historically equaled capability orr just opportunity? By encouraging readers to question conditioning rather than defend it, the book creates space for reflection instead of resistance.
What makes this book stand out is its tone. It is not academic, or judgmental. The subtitle calls it a “no-gyaan, no-judgement guide,” and that promise is genuinely delivered. The writing feels like a conversation with a self-aware friend who is willing to poke fun at himself while also addressing serious issues. Through humor and self-roasting moments, Jain breaks down heavy topics - patriarchy, gender roles, bias, and allyship into bite-sized, understandable ideas.
The graphic format adds another layer of engagement. Visual storytelling makes complex social concepts easier to digest and more relatable. Instead of long lectures, readers get scenarios, dialogue, and examples drawn from everyday life. This makes the book especially effective for those who might otherwise feel defensive or overwhelmed by discussions around feminism.
One of the book’s strongest aspects is how it reframes feminism. It clearly states that feminism is not about women being superior to men. It is about equality, about fairness in opportunities, safety, respect, and representation. Author also tackles common misconceptions, such as the idea that feminists hate men. By addressing these myths directly, he removes fear and replaces it with clarity.
Importantly, the book emphasizes that questioning one’s biases does not make someone “less of a man.” Instead, it highlights that empathy, awareness, and accountability are strengths. This message is crucial in a society where masculinity is often narrowly defined. Author encourages readers to grow without shame, which makes the learning process feel empowering rather than accusatory.
However, readers looking for deep academic analysis may find the book more introductory than exhaustive. It serves best as Feminism 101, a starting point rather than the final word. But that is precisely its purpose. It opens the door for dialogue and self-reflection.
Overall, Putting the Toilet Seat Down is a smart, engaging, and approachable guide to understanding feminism and gender equality. It simplifies complex ideas without oversimplifying them. Most importantly, it invites readers to become better allies, not through guilt, but through understanding. It’s a thoughtful reminder that equality benefits everyone, and that unlearning bias is not a loss of identity, but a step toward becoming a better human being.
February 10, 2026
putting the toilet seat down by harshveer jain
genre: feminist non-fiction
My 💭:
[10/2/26 7.48 PM]
The best part about being on bookstagram is having access to so many varied type of books from genres which I normally don't explore. And I would have missed out on reading a brilliant feminist book like this one.
The moment I saw that there's a feminist non fiction book written by a male author, I knew that I had to read it asap. But I was worried that this would be yet another non fiction book that would end up boring me. After receiving the book and flipping through the pages, I realised that the last term to describe this book is "boring". Filled with colorful comics and a very easy to read font, this book had the most welcoming vibe among my recent reads. And so, I immediately got to reading it ☕
This book is specifically written for a man who doesn't know what feminsm means and is probably from those category of men who says that - feminism has destroyed society and whatnot. I really appreciated how well the author explained all the nuances of feminism and what it means to be a feminist. Feminism is a very umbrella term and there are sooo many things that an individual must understand in order to even understand the need for feminism in our society. Right from the childhood days to dealing with adult life, across all spheres - workplace to religious places to family - all of us women have FELT that discrimination from men. So when the concept of "feminism" popped up in our lives, it took us just one read to understand it. Unlike men, who after being the privileged gender since forever, felt no need for such concept of equality and even consider it to be a nuisance. The author had such an awesome analogy of this whole thing in the book.
.
Unlike what most men think, feminism isn't about putting women first - rather it's about equality, the option to be ABLE TO choose, without being discriminated in the first place. And to be honest, we women can't fix the balance of this society alone ourselves. It needs everyone collectively working together to bring about a change. Because from where I'm standing, we have a long looooong way to go. I mean even people from my generation seem so brainwashed and dumb that it makes me want to pull my hair out. The idea of masculinity and femininity is sooo misused like OMG! For example, a so called feminist guy of friend of mine laughed when he saw that a BTS member was wearing lipstick. Like what?! Seriously, my expectations with this gender are dashed fully. But still, I urge all men and brainwashed women to open their eyes and see the truth and learn and grow...
.
...And for that, you all can start your journey of feminism with this book. And please please keep your mind open and get rid of all the notions you thought were correct. Yes, even your most ingrained notions. 🙏🏻
genre: feminist non-fiction
My 💭:
[10/2/26 7.48 PM]
The best part about being on bookstagram is having access to so many varied type of books from genres which I normally don't explore. And I would have missed out on reading a brilliant feminist book like this one.
The moment I saw that there's a feminist non fiction book written by a male author, I knew that I had to read it asap. But I was worried that this would be yet another non fiction book that would end up boring me. After receiving the book and flipping through the pages, I realised that the last term to describe this book is "boring". Filled with colorful comics and a very easy to read font, this book had the most welcoming vibe among my recent reads. And so, I immediately got to reading it ☕
This book is specifically written for a man who doesn't know what feminsm means and is probably from those category of men who says that - feminism has destroyed society and whatnot. I really appreciated how well the author explained all the nuances of feminism and what it means to be a feminist. Feminism is a very umbrella term and there are sooo many things that an individual must understand in order to even understand the need for feminism in our society. Right from the childhood days to dealing with adult life, across all spheres - workplace to religious places to family - all of us women have FELT that discrimination from men. So when the concept of "feminism" popped up in our lives, it took us just one read to understand it. Unlike men, who after being the privileged gender since forever, felt no need for such concept of equality and even consider it to be a nuisance. The author had such an awesome analogy of this whole thing in the book.
.
Unlike what most men think, feminism isn't about putting women first - rather it's about equality, the option to be ABLE TO choose, without being discriminated in the first place. And to be honest, we women can't fix the balance of this society alone ourselves. It needs everyone collectively working together to bring about a change. Because from where I'm standing, we have a long looooong way to go. I mean even people from my generation seem so brainwashed and dumb that it makes me want to pull my hair out. The idea of masculinity and femininity is sooo misused like OMG! For example, a so called feminist guy of friend of mine laughed when he saw that a BTS member was wearing lipstick. Like what?! Seriously, my expectations with this gender are dashed fully. But still, I urge all men and brainwashed women to open their eyes and see the truth and learn and grow...
.
...And for that, you all can start your journey of feminism with this book. And please please keep your mind open and get rid of all the notions you thought were correct. Yes, even your most ingrained notions. 🙏🏻
February 9, 2026
Are you a feminist? Do you actually know the meaning of it, or is it just a trend and you’re saying it because everyone else is? Do you realize this tag isn't only for women? Well, if you don’t know these basic things, please do read this book—and next time someone asks you, you can kill it with a real answer. When I first picked up this one , I expected something light, but I ended up reading it very slowly because I wanted to actually absorb the weight of it. It’s a smart metaphor for the 'bare minimum' culture we’ve lived in for too long—those small, lazy habits we don't even realize are part of a much bigger problem. His graphics are too good, using simple, sharp doodles to trap huge, complex ideas into a single image that makes the truth impossible to ignore.
One of the most powerful things Jain explains is that feminism isn't a weapon used to attack men, and he is very careful to point out that not all men are "bad" or "villains." Instead, he holds up a mirror to the "good guys" and shows how we can be well-intentioned but still totally blind to the system that favors us. He shifts the focus from feeling guilty to taking responsibility, showing that you can be a nice person and still unintentionally hurt the women around you by just staying passive. Some of the lines in here hit like an absolute punch to the gut because they call out the exact moments we choose comfort over being a real ally.
The book goes deep into the things we usually ignore, like the mental load, where he explains that simply asking "how can I help?" still leaves the burden of planning and managing on women. He breaks down how we are socially conditioned from childhood to take up more space and stay silent when our friends make casual sexist jokes. He even touches on how patriarchy actually hurts men too, by forcing us into a box where we aren't allowed to be vulnerable or emotional. It’s a complete deconstruction of the scripts we’ve been following without question.
By the end, I didn’t feel attacked; I just felt more awake. It’s a straight-talking, honest guide that stops you from hiding behind the good guy label and actually gives you a manual for being a better human being. He makes it clear that being a feminist isn't about grand gestures or social media posts; it’s about the quiet, daily choices you make when nobody is watching. If you want to stop the cringe and start having real respect for the people in your life, you need to sit down and spend time with this book.
One of the most powerful things Jain explains is that feminism isn't a weapon used to attack men, and he is very careful to point out that not all men are "bad" or "villains." Instead, he holds up a mirror to the "good guys" and shows how we can be well-intentioned but still totally blind to the system that favors us. He shifts the focus from feeling guilty to taking responsibility, showing that you can be a nice person and still unintentionally hurt the women around you by just staying passive. Some of the lines in here hit like an absolute punch to the gut because they call out the exact moments we choose comfort over being a real ally.
The book goes deep into the things we usually ignore, like the mental load, where he explains that simply asking "how can I help?" still leaves the burden of planning and managing on women. He breaks down how we are socially conditioned from childhood to take up more space and stay silent when our friends make casual sexist jokes. He even touches on how patriarchy actually hurts men too, by forcing us into a box where we aren't allowed to be vulnerable or emotional. It’s a complete deconstruction of the scripts we’ve been following without question.
By the end, I didn’t feel attacked; I just felt more awake. It’s a straight-talking, honest guide that stops you from hiding behind the good guy label and actually gives you a manual for being a better human being. He makes it clear that being a feminist isn't about grand gestures or social media posts; it’s about the quiet, daily choices you make when nobody is watching. If you want to stop the cringe and start having real respect for the people in your life, you need to sit down and spend time with this book.
March 3, 2026
Who can be an “authority” on Feminism? Conventional academic practices consider someone who has conducted intense research following a strict methodology to be an expert. Another point of view can be that someone who has first hand experience is an “authority”; thus a survivor of a dogbite can be called upon to comment on policy regarding stray dogs.
There surely are books existing on this matter, which are available to us, like Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’s “We Should All Be Feminists”. But in all honesty, the target audience of this book – Indian men – are most likely to be open to advice, guidance or countering opinion from … yes! an Indian man.
Harshveer Jain's Putting the Toilet Seat Down is an outstanding, no-nonsense guide to feminism—witty, graphic, humorous, and deeply empathetic, especially crafted for men who feel confused, defensive, or curious about the topic.
I am heavily impressed & really happy about this book, because, it addresses such a comprehensive range of questions, “no offence”-questions & dumb questions, which wear down the feminist trying to explain feminism to the traditionalist, & every single question has been responded to with respect, logic & invitation to collaborate.
There's almost nothing that I didn't like about the book! Well, yes, there is one thing ... the title! My 14 years old daughter didn't get the title, which means later GenZ are not acquainted with the idea ... & I am quite sure that earlier generations of non-American-series-watching Indians aren't either (In any case I do not understand why Americans flush without closing the LID, & why all genders don't leave it that way - closed ... Gross!) & won't get the reference ... but then, maybe a confusing, vaguely gross-sounding title is just the clickbait which are, sadly, in our times, needed to get some people to read a book, any book.
Read it! Read it with curiosity, read it with desperation, even read it to prove the author wrong with whataboutery!
There surely are books existing on this matter, which are available to us, like Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’s “We Should All Be Feminists”. But in all honesty, the target audience of this book – Indian men – are most likely to be open to advice, guidance or countering opinion from … yes! an Indian man.
Harshveer Jain's Putting the Toilet Seat Down is an outstanding, no-nonsense guide to feminism—witty, graphic, humorous, and deeply empathetic, especially crafted for men who feel confused, defensive, or curious about the topic.
I am heavily impressed & really happy about this book, because, it addresses such a comprehensive range of questions, “no offence”-questions & dumb questions, which wear down the feminist trying to explain feminism to the traditionalist, & every single question has been responded to with respect, logic & invitation to collaborate.
There's almost nothing that I didn't like about the book! Well, yes, there is one thing ... the title! My 14 years old daughter didn't get the title, which means later GenZ are not acquainted with the idea ... & I am quite sure that earlier generations of non-American-series-watching Indians aren't either (In any case I do not understand why Americans flush without closing the LID, & why all genders don't leave it that way - closed ... Gross!) & won't get the reference ... but then, maybe a confusing, vaguely gross-sounding title is just the clickbait which are, sadly, in our times, needed to get some people to read a book, any book.
Read it! Read it with curiosity, read it with desperation, even read it to prove the author wrong with whataboutery!
Review of advance copy received from Publisher
Insightful, humorous, and deeply important.
It’s very well done! The author takes a sensitive topic and does a lot of work to destigmatize across various contexts through a great mix of research and humor.
I particularly enjoyed the chapters on consent and the workplace. The comics help make the observations relatable.
One line really stuck with me - a moment where a father tells his son that it is only logical to support the mother: "How can we be happy as a family if one of us is unhappy?"
If I could raise one point for improvement: I would have loved to see more comics throughout the section on religion, as well as in the first couple of chapters (e.g. on intersectionality). Those sections are a bit heavier, and the visual humor would have balanced the tone perfectly.
Overall: A great read that I would definitely recommend to most men.
It’s very well done! The author takes a sensitive topic and does a lot of work to destigmatize across various contexts through a great mix of research and humor.
I particularly enjoyed the chapters on consent and the workplace. The comics help make the observations relatable.
One line really stuck with me - a moment where a father tells his son that it is only logical to support the mother: "How can we be happy as a family if one of us is unhappy?"
If I could raise one point for improvement: I would have loved to see more comics throughout the section on religion, as well as in the first couple of chapters (e.g. on intersectionality). Those sections are a bit heavier, and the visual humor would have balanced the tone perfectly.
Overall: A great read that I would definitely recommend to most men.
April 16, 2026
The author used artistic images to explain the nuances of Feminism, and called out responsibilities of today’s man towards the other gender. It was a quick read and the message comes out pretty clear in some parts of the book. Although author could have used a simpler language to prove the point. I couldn’t retain much of the things I read, because of the jargons and circling around the same point. One extra star solely for the topic selection by author and the efforts he put to explain the difficult concept.
Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews