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Untangling the Ties That Bind: Heal Enmeshment Trauma and Break Dysfunctional Patterns with Family Members
184 pages, Paperback
Published September 1, 2026
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Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
Thank you to NetGalley and New Harbinger Publications for providing me with an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
Family is often described as the place where we first learn love, but for many people it's also where we first learn pain. "Untangling the Ties That Bind" approaches that difficult reality with remarkable compassion, validating the experiences of those navigating unhealthy or emotionally damaging family relationships while offering practical ways to begin healing.
What stood out most to me was the balance between empathy and accountability. The author doesn't encourage readers to dwell in resentment or assign blame without purpose. Instead, they focus on recognizing harmful patterns, understanding how those patterns shape us, and finding healthy ways to move forward. Whether that means setting firm boundaries, redefining what family means, or learning to let go of unrealistic expectations, the message remains grounded in self-respect and emotional well-being.
The writing is approachable and easy to absorb, even when discussing emotionally heavy topics. Rather than feeling overly clinical, the book feels like a thoughtful guide that gently walks readers through difficult questions while providing actionable tools for reflection. I especially appreciated that healing isn't presented as a straight line or a one-size-fits-all process. Every family dynamic is different, and the authors acknowledge the complexity without offering oversimplified solutions.
This is the kind of book that invites you to pause after each chapter and think about your own experiences. Some sections may be uncomfortable, but that discomfort often signals an opportunity for growth. Even readers who don't identify with every example will likely come away with a deeper understanding of how family relationships can shape identity, self-worth, and future connections.
If you've ever struggled with guilt over setting boundaries, questioned whether distance from family can sometimes be the healthiest choice, or simply want a deeper understanding of complex family dynamics, this is a thoughtful and validating read. It reminds us that protecting your peace isn't an act of selfishness, it's often an essential part of healing.
Family is often described as the place where we first learn love, but for many people it's also where we first learn pain. "Untangling the Ties That Bind" approaches that difficult reality with remarkable compassion, validating the experiences of those navigating unhealthy or emotionally damaging family relationships while offering practical ways to begin healing.
What stood out most to me was the balance between empathy and accountability. The author doesn't encourage readers to dwell in resentment or assign blame without purpose. Instead, they focus on recognizing harmful patterns, understanding how those patterns shape us, and finding healthy ways to move forward. Whether that means setting firm boundaries, redefining what family means, or learning to let go of unrealistic expectations, the message remains grounded in self-respect and emotional well-being.
The writing is approachable and easy to absorb, even when discussing emotionally heavy topics. Rather than feeling overly clinical, the book feels like a thoughtful guide that gently walks readers through difficult questions while providing actionable tools for reflection. I especially appreciated that healing isn't presented as a straight line or a one-size-fits-all process. Every family dynamic is different, and the authors acknowledge the complexity without offering oversimplified solutions.
This is the kind of book that invites you to pause after each chapter and think about your own experiences. Some sections may be uncomfortable, but that discomfort often signals an opportunity for growth. Even readers who don't identify with every example will likely come away with a deeper understanding of how family relationships can shape identity, self-worth, and future connections.
If you've ever struggled with guilt over setting boundaries, questioned whether distance from family can sometimes be the healthiest choice, or simply want a deeper understanding of complex family dynamics, this is a thoughtful and validating read. It reminds us that protecting your peace isn't an act of selfishness, it's often an essential part of healing.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
Thank you Netgalley for providing me with a copy in exchange for my unbiased review.
Enmeshment is one of those family dynamics that's hard to name from the inside. It doesn't look like abuse. It looks like closeness... right up until you notice you can't make a decision without checking how someone else will feel about it. This book sets out to give that pattern a name and a way through it.
What makes it work is that it doesn't ask you to pick a side against your own family. It's not a resentment book. It holds two things at once: your pain is legitimate, and blame isn't the answer. The goal is recognizing the pattern, understanding how it shaped you, and figuring out what you actually want going forward. FYI, this isn't a book that promises anything is fixable overnight. It offers solutions that require more reflection and sitting with discomfort at times.
The writing itself sounds like its strongest asset: plain, warm, unclinical, the kind of book you can put down mid-chapter to actually sit with a question rather than just keep reading. And it resists the trap a lot of books in this genre fall into: offering one script for every family. Overall, this is a compassionate, practically-minded guide for anyone who's ever felt guilty for wanting space from people who love them.
Enmeshment is one of those family dynamics that's hard to name from the inside. It doesn't look like abuse. It looks like closeness... right up until you notice you can't make a decision without checking how someone else will feel about it. This book sets out to give that pattern a name and a way through it.
What makes it work is that it doesn't ask you to pick a side against your own family. It's not a resentment book. It holds two things at once: your pain is legitimate, and blame isn't the answer. The goal is recognizing the pattern, understanding how it shaped you, and figuring out what you actually want going forward. FYI, this isn't a book that promises anything is fixable overnight. It offers solutions that require more reflection and sitting with discomfort at times.
The writing itself sounds like its strongest asset: plain, warm, unclinical, the kind of book you can put down mid-chapter to actually sit with a question rather than just keep reading. And it resists the trap a lot of books in this genre fall into: offering one script for every family. Overall, this is a compassionate, practically-minded guide for anyone who's ever felt guilty for wanting space from people who love them.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
Untangling the Ties That Bind explores the lasting impact of dysfunctional family relationships and offers practical guidance for setting healthy boundaries without losing sight of your own well-being. Jordan Pickell and Sherrie Campbell explain how family roles, guilt, manipulation, and unresolved trauma can shape our lives long after childhood. I especially appreciated the discussions around recognizing unhealthy patterns and giving yourself permission to step away from relationships that continue to cause harm.
As someone who has experienced family trauma, much of this book resonated with me on a personal level. It acknowledges how complicated these relationships can be while offering hope that healing is possible, even when reconciliation isn't. I found it validating without being overly simplistic, and compassionate without excusing harmful behavior. My sincere thanks to the publisher and NetGalley for providing me with a free advance review copy.
As someone who has experienced family trauma, much of this book resonated with me on a personal level. It acknowledges how complicated these relationships can be while offering hope that healing is possible, even when reconciliation isn't. I found it validating without being overly simplistic, and compassionate without excusing harmful behavior. My sincere thanks to the publisher and NetGalley for providing me with a free advance review copy.
September 20, 2026
A great read for anyone and everyone! Jordan Pickell addresses the serious topics in a straight forward and easy to digest way. The examples throughout the chapters provide excellent visualization of the key concepts.
This is a must read! Your inner self with thank you for reading this book as it has the power to transform relationships with others while providing a foundation for helping yourself.
This is a must read! Your inner self with thank you for reading this book as it has the power to transform relationships with others while providing a foundation for helping yourself.
September 26, 2026
Growing up as the caretaker in your family has a name here: enmeshment. The guide draws on internal family systems work to show how care quietly turned into obligation and how guilt keeps you stuck in that pattern. You'll find guided practices for spotting the dynamics and setting boundaries without apologizing for your own needs. It's a warm, practical companion if Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents spoke to you.
September 10, 2026
this book came to me at exactly the right time
i've been working on untangling the ties that bind for some time now
and the author described it so well, there will be pushback, there will be chaos, but then the system recalibrates and the reliance on you performing the status quo lessens
it's worth it
for anyone who is creating a new future for themselves, this book is for you <3
i've been working on untangling the ties that bind for some time now
and the author described it so well, there will be pushback, there will be chaos, but then the system recalibrates and the reliance on you performing the status quo lessens
it's worth it
for anyone who is creating a new future for themselves, this book is for you <3
Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews