The Courage to be Ordinary: The life-changing book from the bestselling author of The Courage to be Disliked

by Ichiro Kishimi

FROM THE 15 MILLION-COPY BESTSELLING AUTHOR OF THE COURAGE TO BE DISLIKED

You Found The Courage To Be Disliked, Now Discover The Power of Ordinary

At one time or another, everyone has hoped that they are different to everyone else – that they are somehow special. Beneath that desire lies a constant, anxious comparison with others, which prevents happiness without us even realising. How, then, can we free ourselves from this cycle of restless competition and find a new way to thrive?

In his inspiring new book, Ichiro Kishimi explores a way of living that will free you from your unease, improve your confidence and help you live a happy life. Rather than striving to be ‘better’ than everyone else, Kishimi reveals that focusing solely on your own potential and accepting who you are is the superpower you really need to succeed in work and in life.

216 pages, Kindle Edition

Published June 25, 2026

About the author

Ichiro KISHIMI Philosopher, Adlerian psychologist and translator of English and German languages. Born in 1956.

M.A.in philosophy from Kyoto University. Director of the Japanese Society of Adlerian psychology. Former counselor at Maeda Clinic in Kyoto and has taught philosophy and ancient Greek at various institutions such as Kyoto University of Education and Nara Women's University.

He presently teaches educational psychology and clinical psychology at Meiji School of Oriental Medicine in Suita, Osaka. Kishimi now has his own private counseling office in Kameoka, Kyoto, and devotes his time to giving lectures on Adlerian Psychology and child education.

Reviews

[Alexej Gerstmaier · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not nearly as good as courage to be disliked.

Book purported some ideas that I disagree strongly with where no interesting counterpoints to my position were offered; ideas such as:
-that a sense of urgency is a bad thing
-that being slow is not inherently inferior to being fast

Still, the book did offer some original ideas and reframings; a lot reminded me of Peter Thiel's famous "Competition is for losers" concept

[Natasha · Rating 3 out of 5]

I had high hopes because I loved The Courage to be Disliked but this didn’t really shift my mindset or teach me anything new.

[Lucy · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was very happy to receive a free review copy of The Courage to be Ordinary by Ichiro Kishimi from NetGalley, and this is my honest review. The book is well structured, with clear and detailed chapters that are easy to follow. It explores feelings of inferiority when we feel we have not achieved as much as others and how we can begin to challenge and change this mindset.

The author questions many of our thought patterns and suggests ways to approach studying, work, and life with greater confidence. Chapters focus on a range of ideas, including approval, confidence, recognition, originality, judgement, responsibility, ambition, growth, and, of course, courage. Personal stories are woven throughout to emphasise key points, which I found really helpful and made many of the ideas easier to connect with.

Some of this book reminded me of the Chinese concept of “Lying Flat”, which has gained momentum amongst younger people, which is the idea of stepping away from constant striving in academic life, careers and society’s expectations. To me, this book felt as though it touched on some similar ideas. The author discusses how many young people may not naturally choose the elite school route or certain careers and how these decisions can sometimes be driven more by parental expectations than personal wishes.

The book explores many other concepts too, all of which I enjoyed reading about, and encourages us to think more deeply about what really matters in life. The final chapter neatly concludes and draws together the key points discussed throughout.

[Otis · Rating 5 out of 5]

A lot of the same material covered in the last 2 books, but I actually enjoyed it more. I didn't really gel with the dialogue set up of the courage to be disliked/happy so this was an easier read for me.

Nothing particularly groundbreaking in here either, but I found myself agreeing with pretty much everything Kishimi was saying. Also, this book made me uncomfortably reflect on my own personality as someone who is unfortunately, for better or worse, forever striving to be 'better'.

I feel this book is a very gentle and soft reminder which I think could be revisited time and time again.

If you liked the concepts in the Kishimi's previous books but hated the format, then give this one a try.

[Helen · Rating 3 out of 5]

There are some very good elements to this book but also it’s a bit of a one trick pony. The entire book is basically saying that you need to stop comparing yourself to others because it holds you back. Great advice but maybe it doesn’t need a whole book to say it. There are also a lot of quotes from Adler. I couldn’t help but find myself wondering if I would have done better reading some of his original works. Thanks to NetGalley and Vermilion for the ARC.

[Tony · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not a bad read, but could be better.

The structure of the book changes from a dialogue to short takes that leave wishing for more. The second half of the book comes far too quickly and the realisation that the author’s pondering about certain ideas and positions is not just going deep enough and does not providing enough practical advice—if any at all.

I would say it is necessary as a closing chapter in the “The Courage to be” series but a clear step down, too.

[Lasciel · Rating 4 out of 5]

I don't know why this says pre-publication. I picked it up at the airport.

It's an interesting concept and made me reconsider my life. Does it deal with burn out? -maybe. Does it deal with altered expectations of life? - Definitely.

Worth a read I think. Not sure it has enough to practically do for me. But is a good thought piece.

[Jose-Luiz Moura · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was disappointing. I loved The Courage to be Disliked so maybe I was expecting too much from this book and it did not deliver. I appreciated that it did not replicated the young man and the master dialogue which I thought it was good, but the book could be half as long and give us the same content.

[Holly · Rating 3 out of 5]

In my current state (very burnt out) I did find this somewhat helpful to read and a couple of sections did genuinely help me. However, all in all o found it a tad repetitive and on the nose. It also referenced Adler so much I may as well just go read his stuff instead! Didn’t hate it but not my favourite.

[Jed Walker · Rating 4 out of 5]

Solid follow-up to one of the better books of the last few years. More simple, practical advice that will help anyone willing to consider & apply it. I certainly have differences in worldview and core values, but there is plenty here to find helpful.

[Natalie U · Rating 1 out of 5]

what a crappy book.

[Nicola Pennell · Rating 3 out of 5]

An ok book, with some good reminders for life. Although a lot of it is about stopping comparing self to others.

[Rachel · Rating 5 out of 5]

It makes some interesting points but overall it felt very repetitive, and more or less read like an essay on Adler. I also don’t feel that it addressed the point of being ok with being ordinary.