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32 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2004

: Even on the invitation I am not depicted; how rude. No-one remembers to include the fourth. No-one bothers to remember to include me, even though I am the one that turns up to save the day time and again.
: Wheesht, you know that you are the one that everyone adores. Let's read through the invitation again to make sure we have it right because this doesn't feel too right does it!?
: You see, they are all exactly the same; no hidden deviations to give us a clue as to what this is all about.
: Just as well I bought the CDM street guide from that tour operator in the coach carpark as we'd never of been able to find the HQ, what with all the hastily erected add-on buildings. I hear CELEBRITY CITY has its own laws, postage and police - it has country status.
: If we hadn't bought that map we would have used the front entrance; that horseshoe edifice with all the failed CDM contestants efigised and stuck on the roof.
: The most daunting is Ben Hur in his chariot on the roof overlooking the main entrance. Rumour has it that he met his CDM end whilst distracted and sobbing about putting all his money on the black team.
: Maybe they don't realise we are just a private book club within GoodReads. Who or what is CMC?
: I think you are right, they have called us in in error. Have you noticed the policemen? Haha - they are all wearing tights and balloon skirts.
: It's the pikes they carry that make me feel uncomfortable. Maybe if we explain that there has been a mistake in identity but they would just counter with 'THE CDM IS INFALLIBLE'
: I ASK AGAIN, WHO OR WHAT IS CMC?
: Whilst you lot were in the powder room I asked a loitering old man smoking a malodorous pipe what CMC was, and he turned to his side-kick and laughed maliciously and they went off, hand in hand, to find a bookie.
: I guess this is what is known as a CMC
: I was covered on the invitation under the 'more'