On the ice, Weston Hale and Malikai Stone were rivals. But off the ice, they found something in each other that neither love. For Kai, love was something to share. For Wes, love was something to hide from. Their love was like the game they played—built on motion, instinct, and fleeting moments. But like the best plays on the ice, Kai was only here for a moment, then he was gone. Nearly two years later, Wes is skating through life on autopilot—playing, surviving, but never really living. Then comes Lucas Barrett, a forward traded to the Oregon Timberwolves. Luke is sunshine personified; radiant, exuberant, and warm-hearted. Caught between a past he can't let go of and a future he never thought he'd have, Wes must learn that moving forward isn't the same as forgetting. In both life and hockey, every shift change carries its own purpose. One taught him how to love; one is teaching him how to live.
DNF at 30 % but skimmed the rest just to know what happens.
I had this downloaded on my kindle for a long while, so when I went on to read it, I only remembered that someone recommend it as gut wrenching.
The things that didn't work for me: - The writing is overly descriptive for my taste. - The chapters alternate between past and present. The past is Wes relationship with Kai (who is no longer in the present), and the present is Wes with Luke. My brain cannot focus on 2 stories. I cannot root for the main present couple which is Wes and Luke if I am being told in detail the love story between Wes and Kai. - There is 5 long detailed sex scenes between Wes and Kai. 2 of those scenes were after Wes and Luke started having sex in the present. My brain personally cannot work around that. - Again, The past goes through every stage of Wes and Kai's relationship. How their love started, how it developed, them meeting each other's parents, their domestic life. For me, that did a disservice to Wes's relationship with Luke in the present which in itself didn't feel strong and solid. - Book 1 ends on a cliffhanger and there is book 2. From that blurb, it seems like Kai is heavily featured again. - In my opinion, Wes is an asshole for both Kai and Luke. - I wasn't convinced at all that Wes loves Luke at the end.
I might just skim book 2 with no intention to thoroughly read it or rate/review it, but I want to know what was going on with Kai cus sometimes my curiosity kills me.
If my personal hangups on this book doesn't bother you as well, then give this book a chance.
Had me balling through the last half of the book. Story was well written and explored many issues that really brought the characters to life. Looking forward to reading the 2nd book although I feel like I’ll need a box of tissues to get through it.
I went into this book not knowing anything about it, and I can say I have never full on sobbed so hard for characters before. You can't help but fall in love with all the characters, the story development is beautifully written. I can't wait for the next book in hopes it can repair what this one broke in me!
Oh wow. One of my favorite reads this year. This book is adorable, heartwarming, heartbreaking. I couldn't put it down, it made me smile, it broke a piece of me, and I'm hoping part 2 will heal me. Ps I wanted to throttle Wes a bit. A bit much.
This book is devastating. Cried my eyes out the last 50 some pages. So many emotions. Anger mostly at Wes. Dang that guy is a dick. To both of his partners. Never acknowledging they have a relationship outside of their own little bubbles. Always mean to them. Poor Kai crying and begging him to stay and he just walks out. He unfortunately seen the consequences of they way he treats Kai . I can't wait for the second book. Hopefully he starts treating Lucas better.
I'm struggling to put into words how this book has made me feel, the only words that come to mind are utterly heartbroken. A story of love, loss, hockey,and second chances. The love Kai and Wes shared, then to have everthing taken away gutted me, I knew heartbreak was coming, I knew Kai was gone but that did not make reading it any easier, I have sat here for the past two hours with tears pouring down my face. I just keep thinking of Wes taking the glass. Wes thought he could love anyone else after Kai but then along came Luke, he shown him that he can love and live again, Wes just needs to let Luke in. This book ends on a cliffhanger and I'm patiently waiting for August to read the next book.
Updated to review: I have added the trigger warnings in the section with spoilers.
I probably would have still read this book if the triggers would have been in the book but right now, I am frustrated that they were not included (even at the back to where you made the decision to click the link and stay within the book) and instead we are directed to go to the author's website so I am putting this here... Seriously think about going to the author's website and reading the trigger warnings. I think this has been the hardest book for me to read..
The only thing I will say before I put spoiler tag is that I am at the point that I have paused reading but I am upset and mad. It has triggered me pretty hard and that is absolutely on me. I didn't go the the author's website to review the triggers on the website. I was in airplane mode and started it at work on my lunch break... Another mistake. Luckily, most was read at home but I have had to put it down quite a few times. I've paused reading this book but it is probably going to be a DNF. I am not sure I can finish it with how I am feeling.
I am going to end this here... I am way too upset to continue because I am not even sure I am making any sense and realize how crazy it is for me to be the upset over fictional characters but the thing is... The LGBTQIA+ community do go through this and so many do have to hide who they are and who they love because even their home lives aren't safe.
Reviewing this book through a face full of tears and a broken heart, having stayed up reading until 3.30am... which says it all really.
This book is a dual-timeline story about love, loss, grief and the devastating impact of internalised homophobia.
The early part tells the love story of Wes, a hockey defenseman, and Kai, a bright and beautiful rookie player on a rival team.
Wes is deeply closeted and emotionally closed off as a result of his homophobic father. Although Wes loves Kai deeply, he can't allow himself to be out and proud with him, or even to tell Kai how he truly feels, instead choosing to try to live in the moment and not think about what might their future might hold.
As their relationship progresses, Wes's fear of being outed begins to take its toll on Kai, who gradually starts to lose his sparkle. Despite their love for each other, Wes and Kai start to hurt each other emotionally, until one night everything comes to a head and Wes loses Kai forever.
Fast forward a couple of years and we find Wes still trapped by guilt and grief, and unable to move forward. More emotionally closed off than ever, he's just going through the motions in life - until a new player, Luke, arrives on the team and changes everything. Luke's bright and kind and reminds Wes of Kai... but how can Wes allow himself to fall for someone new when he's still in love with the man he lost?
I loved the relationship between Wes and Kai, and the ways that Wes showed his love through quiet gestures behind closed doors.
I loved Kai, who adored Wes fiercely, and the way he tried to heal him, even without fully understanding the demons he was fighting.
My heart broke for Wes and his poor damaged soul, which won't allow him to have the love he deserves from life.
And most of all, my heart broke for poor kind and lovely Luke, who loves Wes but can't understand why he can't seem to love him back, stoically enduring Wes's occasional cruelty without understanding its origin.
I didn't realise this was a two-parter. Although the story would have allowed Wes and Kai to be the focus of Book 1 and Wes and Luke to be the focus of Book 2, I suspect the author decided to tell both stories in parallel so that we at least have some hope of a happy ending for Wes by the end of this instalment. The book was sad enough as it was, and without the Luke storyline to balance things out, it would have been utterly devastating.
4.25 stars out of 5. Not a five-star read purely because I felt the hockey content was excessive at times and found myself skipping through detailed descriptions of matches. Apart from that though - emotional, riveting and heartbreaking.
Definitely one of my favorites for this year. I did not read the trigger warning ahead of time and that was fine for me but if you have potential triggers please be mindful of your mental health and read those tw’s.
This was such an emotional story. Yes there are points of gut wrenching sobs but I found myself get teary at many places in the story.
I wanted to give Wes a good shake more than once but sadly he is a product of his upbringing and he just wasn’t in a place where he could envision things being different
I waited until Beneath the Ice was released to start on Shift Change so now I can just keep right on going since I already have my tissues out.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
They say books with mental health trope should be read with caution and i couldn’t agree more! This book broke my heart into a million pieces! It hurt so so much! Kai you angel! A beautiful angel! I honestly felt sick at the end of this book. The pain!! The love hurts! My poor Wes jeez that man hurts!! Luke Luke Luke well I love you!! Please I need to get to book 2 before I freak out that you’re not going to be ok!! Please if your deciding on reading this have tissues and a strong soul!! X
I was hesitant to read this because of the cliffhanger but my besties encouraged me to push through and I’m glad I did. There are a lot of heart wrenching and heart breaking moments in this book. A few rays of hope which is what keeps us on the edge of our seats. Lots of hurt people hurting people. I cried the entire last 10% of the book. I hope to see the resolution we’re all rooting for in Book 2.
It will make you cry, but it will also warm your heart. The characters are fantastic, and you can’t help but find yourself rooting for them every step of the way.
The writing is brilliant, and I was so excited to receive an ARC of the follow-up story. It will be wonderful to be back with these characters and continue their journey.
Wes, Kai, and Luke will find a special place in your heart by the end of this book. ❤️
Umm, I’m utterly shattered after reading this book. It’s heartbreaking, frustrating (mostly Wes’ behavior) and omg Kai 😭 I haven’t had a book destroy me in a while but this one did it. I’m actually incredibly grateful I didn’t read this until now so I can go straight into book 2 because I would not emotionally recover. This is one of those books that stays with you. Ugh, infinity stars. No notes. But I’m sending you my therapy bill 😭❤️
This book is everything. Grief, love, fear, spice. Wes loses good first love in the most horrific way and just stops living. Until he meets Luke and no matter how hard he tries, he came alive again. I haven’t cried so hard through a book maybe ever. The try definition of the term: grief is unspent love. Wes, despite his childhood that was seriously lacking in love, has so much more love to give than he ever thought possible.
Whoa. I don’t think I was fully prepared for the depth of this story. Did I stay up til 3 am reading it? Yes. Did I cry for the last 3 hours? Yes. Absolutely wrecked me.
Check your triggers. Be prepared for an emotional journey. Be ready to jump right into the next book.
Amazing! So well written and heartbreaking. As much as you wish everyone could get a happy ending, I stopped myself numerous times to remind myself to think realistically. The author does an amazing job of depicting grief, heartbreak and how to navigate life that keeps moving when you all you want to do is crumble and fall apart.
This may be the saddest, most devastating book I have ever read! I’m usually not a fan of dual timeline POV, but this was done masterfully! You get to see Kai, Luke and Wes in some truly beautiful moments, and some very sad ones. Wonderfully written! Can’t wait for book 2!
Omg, talk about a hidden gem!!!! I’m so glad I found this book!!! Absolutely LOVED Kai and Luke.. I found myself missing each character every other chapter… was absolutely sobbing in the last third of the book. I can’t wait to see what happens next for them. RIP Kai 💔
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
I don’t tend to weep while reading mm romance. I did here. I don’t like sad and heavy while I read mm romance. I did here. I don’t give many 5 star reviews. I did here. Thankful that I can dive into the second book immediately.
OMG what a tear jerker, I can't remember the last time I cried so much at a book. I had to sit with a tea-towel to catch my tears, tissues were not enough. This book was amazing, loved the stories that overlay through the book. Straight into book 2 now .
I think it’s very interesting that both of this author’s books are a direct copy of titles by Ryan Taylor and Joshua Harwood that have already been released. Coincidence? I think not.
This was one of the most beautiful stories I've ever read. Easily an infinity-star read for me, and it has already become my favorite book of 2026.
Going into this story, I knew it was going to be emotional, but I was completely unprepared for just how much it would wreck me. From the very beginning, we know that Kai isn't in the present-day timeline, and yet I still let myself fall completely in love with him. Maybe that's what made it hurt even more.
I'm a sucker for a dual timeline, so I absolutely loved the way the story moved between the past and present. Watching Wes's journey unfold piece by piece made every reveal hit that much harder. As we slowly approached the present day, we finally began to understand why Wes had become the guarded, closed-off man he was. Every layer peeled back made my heart ache for him.
Kai and Wes completely stole my heart. I rooted for them with everything I had. Their love felt so genuine, so hopeful, and so painfully bittersweet.
But then there's Luke. Luke is quite possibly the sweetest character to ever exist. He wears his heart on his sleeve and simply wants to be loved and accepted. He gives Wes everything without hesitation, while Wes struggles to let anyone truly in. My heart broke for him over and over again.
I desperately wanted a happy ending for every single person in this story. Even through all the heartbreak and tears, I loved every second of it. This book shattered me in the best possible way.
I am absolutely foaming at the mouth waiting for book two. I need it immediately.
Malakai (Kai) Weston (Wes) and Lucas (Luke) Even with the trigger warnings I was not prepared. First of all - so good. Excellent writing. I can’t believe this is a debut novel. But second - omg the tears. I knew Kai was not in the present timeline but I did not expect how hard it was going to be to navigate through his relationship with Wes. This is a dual timeline and I love that. In the past we’re watching the relationship between Wes and Kai develop while in the present watching Wes and Luke. And not fully understanding the hurtful behavior Wes is throwing at this little puppy dog of a character Luke. Eventually we can’t help falling in love with our golden retriever Kai. And it breaks our hearts along with Kai’s as we watch Wes struggle with his own demons. I loved Kai so much that I almost felt guilty loving Luke. I love everything about this book. The family and side characters are wonderful. The grief is written so authentically that there’s no chance it won’t hit hard. The farther into the book I got the harder I cried. Right up until the last page. We don’t get a true HEA but we do get the sense things are going to work out in the next book. 5/5 ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Highly recommend.
I adored this book!!! From start to finish it had me hooked and I’m not normally a fan of “then & now” books but oh my goodness I loved every single second of this one. Just fabulous